[00:00:00] Anabe from the last samurai has it. I was like I guess he's had a pretty good life

[00:00:04] I was like trying to convince myself that I have a good life

[00:00:08] And that's the Ken Watanabe story. Yeah

[00:00:11] Yeah, after Adam had sex with Ken Watanabe who has a Kent wanted

[00:00:16] Kent want a knob a

[00:00:20] No, he wants a knob who Ken wants a knobby

[00:00:23] He can't even a Canadian Japanese. Oh King wants an Aabe. He was the second to last samurai

[00:00:30] and then the last one was of course

[00:00:33] Tom Tom Thomas Cruz one of the last samurai one of the

[00:00:38] It's a fat guy

[00:00:42] Why would it be fat guy man because that's who likes that culture. That's true

[00:00:46] You're either severely underweight or fattish it. Mm-hmm imagine you're just working in like Japanese customs

[00:00:54] And you see those guys getting off the plane. They're like

[00:01:00] He's gonna try and play he thinks he's gonna fuck the girls

[00:01:04] Wise here. He thinks they're gonna be impressed that he like learned four words from a children's show

[00:01:11] Just fucking teavas and oh, yeah cargo shorts. Yep. Yeah to carry all your knickknacks all the Japanese knickknacks you got

[00:01:24] That's why I wore that's why I was I wanted to

[00:01:27] Establish I was not one of those fat guys when we were in Japan. That's why I'm track

[00:01:32] That's why I was making it certain that I'm not I'm the cool fat guy

[00:01:37] I still would like to fuck the women, but you know did not listen me. I want to fuck the women

[00:01:45] Brandon would you like to fuck the women of Japan? Yeah, yeah in general. Yeah, I'd love to I think it's hard to crack a Japanese woman

[00:01:53] Yeah, I'm probably hard even in America. I think I a Japanese American woman. I find a tough nut

[00:02:00] Japanese people give love so much I

[00:02:07] Japanese women love

[00:02:09] Rapes so much that like it's hard to tell where the line is with them

[00:02:14] Yeah, it's so much further than with like American women

[00:02:18] Like if you go up to a Chinese woman or Japanese woman or bar and just choke slammer into the yeah, that's like being like

[00:02:25] Let's be courted. Oh, hello. I think I think I think I think

[00:02:32] I fucked a girl who is half half Chinese half black and death

[00:02:41] What she's half death no she was full death couldn't hear a lick

[00:02:46] And tell the double racist accent you were talking

[00:02:48] Yeah, yeah, and Greg Stone said to be nice three birds with one stone

[00:02:57] Said one of your birds is a deaf girl

[00:03:08] He's not ableist

[00:03:10] Great she really what kind of noises did she make?

[00:03:13] Uh not many I think she was aware that they were probably gonna be crazy. Yeah, well, I'm in terrified

[00:03:20] You ever hear a deaf person laugh well, yes, but I think they know it's crazy

[00:03:25] I think when they laugh they're like the ones who are like, you know what I'm gonna do it

[00:03:29] I used to work at a cell phone kiosk. Yeah, there's just like hot death

[00:03:34] That one I fucked and I learned sign language just so that they could tell me that they never fucked stop

[00:03:39] No, it was after you

[00:03:49] No, she didn't suck my balls did she do then do this little

[00:03:56] No, she did tiny dick. Yes

[00:03:59] We would talk on her iPad like we should a notes program where you just write and one time I had to

[00:04:06] Get out of her bed naked

[00:04:09] Walk across the room get the iPad walk back across the room getting to bed and then slowly like

[00:04:15] Scroll out like I'm sorry. I usually last longer

[00:04:29] Fucking and then and then that shot zooms out and it's a presentation and Tim Cook is like

[00:04:36] These are just some of the things you can do

[00:04:39] With the new iPad

[00:04:44] Where you bust early with the death three bird chick

[00:04:50] She lived above like the loudest bar

[00:04:53] Yeah, I thought you meant she was a real estate agent. No, no, no, that'd be like well. I'm the your new home

[00:05:10] Anyways, that's where did you meet this one with tinder?

[00:05:14] Nice

[00:05:16] That was sorry go ahead. I know you're nothing

[00:05:19] The like the biggest idiot I knew in college you should get blackout and send like mass text to people

[00:05:26] Yeah, I went to school in DC and he got blackout one night and sent a mass text to like all our friends

[00:05:32] He's like I'm partying down at that with the deaf kids at the deaf college Gallaudet University

[00:05:38] And he's like this shit is crazy. You guys should come you were saying that like kids were like fingering each other

[00:05:44] No, it's deaf people throw the fun. They love the culture is crazy. Yeah, okay

[00:05:50] She was like and she was like this is what like the deaf world. This is what it is normal. Yeah, really?

[00:05:57] Yes, there's no music. Well, it's you know, and it's a hack point, but they sound retarded. So yeah people think they are

[00:06:03] Well, I also like how you just added there was no music playing right like yes

[00:06:08] Silas they can't hear anything, but they like the vibrations what they do they are because I asked her

[00:06:15] I was like, do you know?

[00:06:17] What music is?

[00:06:21] Understand you like this where's a blank? I think a color is right? Yeah, then she was like

[00:06:27] I mean I can like we can feel it, you know, like I can feel the beat right, but I don't I don't you know

[00:06:33] I don't really know now. Okay, go back to say she was saying like deaf culture is

[00:06:37] Great like we should like would you eat your ass off rip or what do you mean? She was she just wanted she wanted like

[00:06:45] Immediately like wanted fingers up the ass like right away

[00:06:48] You know first time and had no and it was nice. There were no who tells that story about the put your fingers in my ass

[00:06:55] Is there somebody that has that story about it a deaf girl? Am I just having like deja vu? Maybe fuck

[00:07:01] I maybe maybe that's a bit we did that sounds no no no no this is fun. Ah fuck. This is not a comic

[00:07:08] Oh, okay, put your fingers in my ass

[00:07:13] I mean that's the thing where it's like oh that could have been like every other sentence last week

[00:07:19] And

[00:07:21] Yeah, she wanted you know a lot of stuff up her ass great. There was no your wallet. There was no

[00:07:26] Yeah, whatever was there was no she had no qualms about it being like us being like this was years a few years ago

[00:07:35] But she had no qualms about it being totally sexual like it was like it was like no

[00:07:40] I don't we can't fucking talk like what do you think this is gonna be awesome?

[00:07:44] You know like like I'm supposed to bring you home to my deaf parents

[00:07:48] Right she was actually like she was actually from DC DC

[00:07:52] It's like the world capital of Deaf people and then on top of that Maryan you brought some loud boy home

[00:08:01] Loud race

[00:08:08] To podcasts and audiobooks on speakerphone

[00:08:14] She had nothing she had she wasn't even like a partial talker

[00:08:18] I think those guys those like I think they can hear a little Marley Maitlin

[00:08:25] Or they or they just learn how to move their mouth, but she she no one taught her that

[00:08:30] In plan ice a cochlear

[00:08:34] I don't know I don't remember a name

[00:08:37] Because I have tried to look through my phone

[00:08:39] Fire's in there back up the name in all capital letters. Yeah. Yeah. Well, here's the interesting thing

[00:08:50] When she fucking

[00:08:53] Contact when we started talking on Tinder. I go

[00:08:56] Where you from? She's a DC. I said no you're not you're tricking me because her grammar was so bad

[00:09:02] And what I found out which I still don't quite understand is that deaf people often don't write very well

[00:09:08] Well, yeah, cuz ASL is a different language. Yeah, there's no there's no reason for them to have like

[00:09:14] Conjunctions and that's right like you when you're doing sign language. You would just say me go eat some

[00:09:20] Some that people know like C sign though, which is like like almost like a like a trans

[00:09:26] Literated I guess version of English, but it like follows like English grammar rules more than like American sign language would but but here's my issue with it

[00:09:34] Yeah, maybe you can explain like source. Yeah, so so I

[00:09:40] She explained that to me and she was like ASL is not she breading the problem was that she was half black

[00:09:52] My issue is that if you're deaf

[00:09:55] wouldn't you just because of like

[00:09:58] lack of

[00:09:59] Non-hearing entertainment wouldn't you read a lot and wouldn't reading a lot make you be able to know write a lot

[00:10:08] Like I'm bored all the fucking time and I still just look at my phone. I play video games

[00:10:14] There's a whole deaf world of you. I don't think that I don't think the thing holding me back from being a moron is that I can hear

[00:10:23] She might just be a dumb bitch

[00:10:25] They have be funny if I go around time people, you know the deaf they don't have great grammar

[00:10:31] Then I meet other deaf people

[00:10:36] Oh, yeah, he met he was she can hear the whole time

[00:10:45] Frog

[00:10:48] Calcos

[00:10:50] Brendan

[00:10:53] I think she was half Chinese

[00:10:57] There was something about her face

[00:11:01] But there was something maybe she was like half black half Chinese, but then also white if you can imagine the combination of facial features

[00:11:13] Great stones like well perfect half a stone one bird

[00:11:17] Greg what's happening?

[00:11:19] Your head

[00:11:22] The only thing this segment has done is make me miss this girl

[00:11:30] That's a shit that stays in your head you're like you can fuck like a million hot women and then you're like ah but that pirate

[00:11:39] 300 pound pirate

[00:11:43] It was so different yeah, but that one with no fingers yeah

[00:11:48] the homeless girl

[00:11:53] I do still miss the homeless girl. I made out with an in-game or an Atlanta. I yeah, I hooked up the homeless girl one time

[00:12:05] That's the plot of I am Sam. Oh, yeah, you get some homeless pussy

[00:12:08] Which you imagine if I am Sam's fucking even homeless woman. He must be slaying. Oh, yeah, he's like I just wanted something different

[00:12:18] He's getting all this regular pussy

[00:12:21] Then he's like I don't know you I could wall dog. She's homeless. What's she gonna do keep it

[00:12:29] Is that really what happens with him Sam? It's the worst movie that's ever been

[00:12:33] I thought you're making a no ridiculous joke

[00:12:36] A lot of I am Sam. I am Sam is the Sean Penn movie

[00:12:39] Replays a retarded man who's knocked up a homeless woman and now he's raising the daughter

[00:12:44] But because she's now become smarter than him at age eight

[00:12:49] The state's gonna take her away and like the prosecutor or whoever the state's like representative is that it takes

[00:12:57] Children away from tard. Yeah, it's played by Toby from west wing

[00:13:01] Oh hell yeah, and he's like well makes you think you can take care of a seven-year-old

[00:13:06] An eight-year-old this man is an idiot

[00:13:16] But it's Toby from west wing given this like in passion like, you know, I just want to be the best speech writer

[00:13:22] I can be is fuck this retarget

[00:13:25] Is Toby the guy who's in billy madison

[00:13:27] It was also get out. No, no, no, that's uh, no radley widford. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but there's this that guy is in west way

[00:13:35] Yeah, yeah, speaking of deaf schools. There's a Russian movie called the tribe. Have you ever heard of it? No

[00:13:41] So it's entirely done in sign language with no subtitles

[00:13:45] About this like boys. No, I'm it's it's one of the craziest movies I've ever seen really it's about this like

[00:13:51] uh kids deaf school where the kid like the new kid gets initiated into like their world of crime

[00:13:58] And then they assign him this girl to start pimping out at the deaf school

[00:14:02] And then he falls in love with the girl that he's supposed to like be like sending sending out on the streets selling her pussy

[00:14:08] And yeah, that pussy did for sale

[00:14:11] That's our

[00:14:13] That's our petal band

[00:14:16] Deaf pussy for sale. Yeah, like sort of like a queen's of the stone

[00:14:19] Yeah, well, but it also works great fs

[00:14:23] It also works great on flyers because like this friday night at the pet the bell had deaf pussy for sale

[00:14:31] What? How come?

[00:14:33] How come for that? I'll put you guys exactly like you

[00:14:37] But what it's a band

[00:14:39] Oh fuck

[00:14:46] This is yeah, I got just tearing up a single dollar

[00:14:51] Fucking shit

[00:14:59] Fuck we should also say uh

[00:15:01] Brandon a returning guest has a great podcast the rad dude cast

[00:15:05] Mm-hmm. And you motherfucker should sign up on their patreon. Oh, yeah next time you want to get mad at us for some bullshit

[00:15:10] Audio thing and delete your subscription go sign up to the rat son of the rat dude podcast instead throw them

[00:15:16] What do you do five bucks a month five bucks a month stick to the formula, baby?

[00:15:19] We got our formula from you

[00:15:21] We got our formula from Chappo and they got their formula from some other fucking loser

[00:15:25] And you know what we got we have a lot of fans that came from you guys now

[00:15:31] Yeah, three of us have been on it. I'll be honest. Most of them came from my appearance

[00:15:38] Yeah, we get that a lot. We're like they were like no more Greg no more Anthony

[00:15:41] But uh, you know what's funny is now there's this dedicated group of fans who will like

[00:15:49] Message me and go they'll go

[00:15:52] Come town is the best podcast in the world you guys are the second best

[00:15:57] And Tuesdays with stories is a third the three best podcasts in the world. I'm like well you didn't have to number

[00:16:10] They just throw in Tuesdays for no reason

[00:16:15] Which is great. I'm like that's great that you came over but like you don't have to number them

[00:16:19] I know you have to have some kind of social deficiency to like be even able to listen to three people talk for an hour and not like turn it off

[00:16:27] 100 sure I don't care how funny it is to listen to a conversation. You're not part of for an hour

[00:16:33] It's like will you a fucking serial killer? Well, not if you're talking about death pussy for sale, right? That's a band

[00:16:40] A

[00:16:42] And a good band that's uh we in the rad duke has a similar to come town in that like

[00:16:50] We don't

[00:16:52] You know, we also don't have like a hook. Yeah, you know what I mean? So like that's even harder

[00:16:57] Right. It's like we're not talking about like uh, we're not taking relationship questions. Yeah, you know what I mean?

[00:17:03] We're just maybe we should sitting down and talking trump. We've been talking about

[00:17:07] We're just the election. Yep. We're almost there three Jewish women

[00:17:13] Jewish witches

[00:17:15] And we're so we're a coven a coven of a Jewish. What did you tell me that one podcast? It was like they're like we're a coven of 14

[00:17:22] Socialist kickass. No, it was heck yeah hecking so heckling socialist witches. Oh

[00:17:29] They're not doing a bit. No, I love a I love I do love a 14 person podcast

[00:17:34] It's the brian sets our orchestra

[00:17:38] We make 36 dollars a month on patreon only because people listen to that every 25 minutes you guys

[00:17:46] That is funny christ

[00:17:50] You're right. That is funny christ

[00:17:53] It's funny. You said it

[00:17:55] What's this? I don't know this that's larry. He may know if it's a 14 person podcast is one guy

[00:18:00] Okay, that's his only contribution. Yeah, a coven of 73 hecking socialists

[00:18:06] socialist women and we talk about the marvel cinematic universe and wrestling okay

[00:18:14] Man, I and I know it's like been a while since nannette no one's talking about anymore

[00:18:18] But I watched that chris gethard

[00:18:21] Special event last year

[00:18:23] Holy shit

[00:18:25] Is it is it rough awful? Yeah, it's tough and it's like I don't know

[00:18:30] I understand why people got fucking mad at nannette and this has just been on well because screaming services

[00:18:36] That's what some people do with though like just say oh, it's a one-man show

[00:18:40] So it doesn't have to actually be funny and then it's like supposed to be theater or something

[00:18:44] But like that fucking sucks if i'm going to theater. Let me fucking I like to sing a song

[00:18:49] I like these show you know what I mean his tv show is funny

[00:18:53] Which one TCGS I never saw it. Well, anyway, it's his specials the same exact thing as nannette. Yeah. Yeah, it's like sad and shit

[00:19:01] Let me ask you what theater are you going to where you see titties?

[00:19:07] I have a lion king

[00:19:11] Yeah, I get I sneak into the lion king dresser. I have a

[00:19:17] I have a webcam programmed on the dressing room of Matilda that truncheball

[00:19:21] And i'm looking at George most pussy her big heaven in her private bathroom her big blue tits pop out of her shirt

[00:19:29] Anyways, we're all saying the criss getha thing that's right all in this special brandon. This man. I don't watch

[00:19:36] I don't know the guy. I just like I was just blown away because we'd seen what she did with cat Williams who who is incredible again

[00:19:44] The best comedian that's ever lived problem

[00:19:46] So good well the crazy thing about cat Williams and when people people like uh, knock him for being

[00:19:53] Crazy and it's like well if you smoke crack you're gonna be crazy. Yeah, but he is legitimately like an extremely good comedian

[00:19:59] Well, not only that not only that dude his audiences like any comedian

[00:20:05] We'd know yeah would get in front front of an arena of cat Williams fans and be like well

[00:20:11] This is an impossible situation comedy cannot be done because the arena of people just scream yelling

[00:20:19] Just like fights like crazy shit and he goes up there and he controls it

[00:20:23] Can dive foot two men with a purse?

[00:20:26] He conducts the whole thing and it's like it's just like 30,000 thugs like fucking

[00:20:31] Just scream you like you watch a special and they're just yelling and it's like well

[00:20:35] This is on comedy can't happen in this situation and he can do it like he's that good. Yeah, where it's like

[00:20:41] There's very few people that would even take the stage like people would be in the back like no

[00:20:47] That fucking bit about because he's like got some some he's going off on like foreign policy and his like

[00:20:53] Special which is like you know he doesn't know what he's talking

[00:20:57] But it's still cat Williams. So you're like let's see where this goes

[00:21:00] You know and then the the joke is like, you know, he's like, you know, we're in Afghanistan and Pakistan

[00:21:04] He's like motherfucker. You say it Afghanistan. They're Syria and you know blah blah blah and he's like

[00:21:10] The the joke is essentially like look you can go in the club and say fuck every motherfucker in the club

[00:21:18] But then you can't just walk your ass out

[00:21:23] Such a good bit

[00:21:26] It's so far beyond like what you'd expect out of it. It's like just right and he's just right

[00:21:31] It's so and there's no other comedian. That's that like funny that gets blown up all and I don't get it

[00:21:37] I don't like maybe it's because he's like consistent. I don't understand like what why he doesn't really get

[00:21:43] The attention is but he does he does he doesn't

[00:21:48] He doesn't from comedians. He doesn't from the media right, but he's but he's

[00:21:54] Okay, I mean, but yeah

[00:21:56] He's not like he's not like he's not like he's not like who's that yeah, there is that like he's not the black comic they

[00:22:01] Was right? Yeah, he's homophobic

[00:22:06] But he's right

[00:22:12] He hit a target employee in the face with his motorcycle

[00:22:16] The uh

[00:22:17] I believe the details of the transaction were uh the target employee expressed

[00:22:22] Possible interest in buying the motorcycle helmet and then backed out of the deal

[00:22:28] And cat Williams hit him in the face with the

[00:22:31] Which is fair fuck you you said you were gonna buy it from it

[00:22:37] Yeah, I just watched I don't even I don't watch comedy. I just watch clips of norm mcdonald

[00:22:42] Yeah, that's all I like yeah, I like he's the best. Yeah norm does it for me

[00:22:46] I haven't seen the show. I saw a couple episodes was pretty good of the episode of that podcast. It's the same thing basically

[00:22:52] Yeah, yeah, but there's a magic to that podcast because it came out of nowhere, right?

[00:22:56] You're just not expecting norm. It's the best podcast. Yeah ever that first season of the norm mcdonald podcast was yeah

[00:23:02] That's the best podcast ever

[00:23:04] After that's number one come to number two

[00:23:07] Red dude cast number three

[00:23:09] I used to love uh, I used to love when it first came out and this was this was before I knew what a podcast was

[00:23:17] This was back before there was an app where you had to you had to

[00:23:20] I you had to buy him like they were audiobooks on or you

[00:23:25] Yeah, I love I love the ricky dervais podcast and he since has really gotten on my nerves

[00:23:31] Yeah, but when he first came out when when I first like learned about him and like when I first started listening at podcast

[00:23:38] That podcast was fucking great. I never listened. Yeah, it's great

[00:23:41] And then and then he eventually became kind of a whiny and shitty and didn't HBO just bought it and they animated it. Yes. Yes

[00:23:48] Yeah, yeah, the carl pilkington one right. Yeah, I used to watch that when I lived with cubus

[00:23:53] He would download all of them. Yeah, but that shit's so funny. It's so great because carl pilkington in real life

[00:23:59] It's like a genius. We were saying like we kind of stole the formula. We if we go to idiots and then one smart guy that's a loser

[00:24:06] Yeah, well, I got a guy that I think I sound

[00:24:10] Yeah, but the fun

[00:24:13] That's that's what the the thing about

[00:24:16] Your podcast is like well you guys do the same thing like Greg is the imbecile Greg is dumb as shit Greg's a fucking moron

[00:24:24] Mentally, I got to stick up for Greg. No, you know

[00:24:29] Greg's playing a part. I love Greg is very smart

[00:24:33] Sensitive about that. There's a great thing. Yes, you're right. You're like a genius level. No, yes, you are

[00:24:41] Yes, you are. That's the fucking

[00:24:43] That's like four things about this one. No, no, you're not and you act like you're not but you are

[00:24:49] No, I have like I have like old man tidbits where there's certain like I know specific information about our upn

[00:24:56] About weird things. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's like how do you know that it's like because I don't know how to read

[00:25:01] Yes

[00:25:03] But I but but reading like that's a choice. I bet I bet if you your IQ was tested

[00:25:10] No, it's probably extraordinarily. I choose to be illiterate. You're right. You're right. You're like

[00:25:16] It's literally not a choice. It's weird because I have like no control over the shit that stays in my head

[00:25:21] But there's certain things that like facts that I'll remember that I don't know what like I think like I pulled

[00:25:25] I knew the like the commercial release date of CDs

[00:25:29] It was like octope down in like a month. It was like october of like 1982

[00:25:33] Yeah, I pulled one time. I have no idea why I know that and it's like people will mention comedians that I've known probably a decade

[00:25:40] And I haven't seen them in two months and I'm like, who the what are you talking about?

[00:25:43] They should make a they should make a movie of you called uh worthless rain man

[00:25:49] No, that's it rain man except none of the fact that help which which is just a mentally disabled

[00:25:57] It's I am saying no

[00:25:59] I called childless and the court just doesn't like him

[00:26:06] The state takes him to court to be like this man is fucking retarded

[00:26:10] You think you could raise an eight-year-old? I don't have an eight-year-old. They're like but even still

[00:26:16] He's too dumb to raise an eight-year-old. He keeps raw-dogging the homeless

[00:26:22] Senator told me are you going to get to a point? Yeah, wow, we even hear today

[00:26:27] To call this man retarget. Okay. All right. Case closed. He's an imbecile

[00:26:36] Yeah, the thing is oh, uh bet the aside dot com. Yep. That's correct. The read

[00:26:42] We're trying to do thing now where the read is as short as spots

[00:26:45] I like that and I'm presenting this to the clients

[00:26:48] This week bet the side and that's that's it. That's the whole

[00:26:51] But this other that's just I the company because the problem is people fast forward through the reads

[00:26:55] But if you do them quick enough, they don't have time we could just interspersed them in the middle story

[00:26:59] You're like bet the aside become

[00:27:02] What a great job. What is gonna have to rewind?

[00:27:04] Bet the aside that comment was that what's venti aside dot com

[00:27:07] That's the aside dot com. It's vent the aside. It's a ventilation

[00:27:11] Corporation company. You got you

[00:27:14] You can do an h-back

[00:27:16] That's good. A lot of podcast same high. Yeah, you got to get into the local h-back. Yes. Simon vald gm bh

[00:27:23] Industrial concerns

[00:27:25] His proud sponsor the come time

[00:27:28] And if you need acetate polymers

[00:27:32] Eastern Long Island

[00:27:37] Says vulcanized rubbers for any industrial application. We're talking that's right, you know, a mid-grade heavy equipment

[00:27:44] That's what re imaging systems

[00:27:48] Whatever you can think of yeah that that stuff would be used for yeah, that's if we do it. Yeah, see that what you just said

[00:27:55] You're a genius. It's no

[00:27:59] Brendan

[00:28:01] Those things mean

[00:28:07] You and Greg are both stupid

[00:28:09] He's made up a commercial. I'm like I do have vulcanized rubber needs I do

[00:28:16] You're a dumb crazy man. Holy shit

[00:28:20] Markelly has been dropped by his record label following a documentary series that drew allegations to decades of sexual misconduct allegations

[00:28:26] I have enough money to get a fucking recording studio

[00:28:32] Start a label and fucking sign our Kelly right now

[00:28:34] Not guilty records streaming and album sales went through the roof after that came out, but he probably doesn't own this all the old backlog

[00:28:41] This is by low cell high. I know I've made some investing mistake

[00:28:47] With signing our killing to a million dollar deal

[00:28:52] I'm telling I'm telling you I'm putting every goddamn dollar I have in the arc out

[00:28:58] Differences with my label just say you fuck the kid just tell you I'm not gonna censor you

[00:29:03] You want to put that in the song no more euphemism

[00:29:07] We'll go direct the one on the second channels. We're gonna cut out the middleman the fathers

[00:29:12] The FBI yeah, anyways bet the SI calm you can bet on you can bet on whether

[00:29:17] Bet the SI by rame those children is a premiere sports betting website to been in business over 20 years paying out fucking winners

[00:29:24] They offer live in-game wagering change your mind change your bets

[00:29:28] Uh, they got award-winning mobile app easy to use anywhere 24 7 customer service. You call them up say I'm fucking

[00:29:36] I'm gonna kill myself

[00:29:38] Uh

[00:29:40] What else do they do stop?

[00:29:42] They they have a customer support they do

[00:29:45] They do customer support 24 7 24 days a week seven days a week seven 24 days a month. Yeah seven hours a day

[00:29:53] So

[00:29:54] Yep, you got to figure out when though we actually never found out what bet with the dsi stains for

[00:30:01] um

[00:30:03] The ranged black entertainment television doesn't seem interesting

[00:30:08] Dot com. How about that?

[00:30:10] Where's the black with the bt bet? Oh bet bt. Okay. Oh, so you I think bet

[00:30:16] Is just bet. Oh, that's just bet and dsi is something. Yeah, because it's a betting website. Mm-hmm. Okay

[00:30:21] Um bet black entertainment television doesn't seem interesting. That's pretty good

[00:30:26] You what why would they be in the gambling business though? Because it's a gamble to have that as a name. That's sure

[00:30:33] It's a gambling website. It's a gamble. Oh, yeah, no vents. No, no, that's a different

[00:30:42] But they have politics bets to yeah, you can bet it's not just sports baby. Yeah, we'll we'll gank

[00:30:48] a new bachelor's gang it up

[00:30:50] Mm-hmm. Oh bachelorette. You can bet on that. I think I think you know what they should do with the new bachelor

[00:30:56] They get a straight guy and it's mostly women, but then two

[00:31:00] Like gay black men or whatever. Okay, and they're really hot. Yeah, but if he doesn't pick those guys

[00:31:06] He's shaming cancel social media

[00:31:09] Be bully this guy in the picking them. I always said they should do they should do the gay bachelor

[00:31:15] Deontay, I guess you get a rose. They should do the gay bachelor and have one gay guy. Of course you'd say you should have

[00:31:22] Then they'd all

[00:31:25] The game

[00:31:27] Starring Adam free. Check out my cool apartment

[00:31:30] I'm gay and I'm stylish

[00:31:33] No, but then what would happen was all the contestants would just be like why do we have to just compete for this one guy

[00:31:39] They'd fuck they just all start fucking each other. Yeah, and then it wouldn't work. Which is that show temptation island

[00:31:44] Yeah, right never that exactly to make you know

[00:31:47] I was so funny because it was like NBC had survivor. They're like people it was he was on an island

[00:31:53] And Fox was like people fucking yeah, I think that's it

[00:31:58] Fucking oh they do is fuck

[00:32:02] That was awesome. Yeah, you know what though Adam the show you just talked about I remember watching love to watch

[00:32:08] It would be better than the regular guys fucking I remember watching the norch

[00:32:12] Temptation island when I was like 11 12 whenever that was oh yeah jack off and just being like man. I'm never gonna have sex

[00:32:20] I'm just never going

[00:32:26] You can't line me up the edge of a pool with other people

[00:32:30] I would go to the pool and take my shirt off and crawl to the edge

[00:32:34] As fast as possible covering is submerged my body and be like no it's magnification

[00:32:43] Just to up to my nose and water

[00:32:45] In the deep end don't look at me

[00:32:47] They should throw an ugly guy on temptation island just for like just so everyone's fucking and then one guy's just mad

[00:32:55] Well, then you can bet on who wins at bet the aside.com. Yep. They offer live in jame. We're drink this week. We're gonna be betting on

[00:33:01] The fucking NFL take bet on the NFL this week. So when you sign up make sure you use promo code no

[00:33:07] Awe no, it's the Rams. Oh no, there's a buy before the super game bet now who gets the buy you bet

[00:33:15] Yeah, put the money down

[00:33:18] No, no this week this week is for next games are this week no this for next is for Wednesday

[00:33:23] Yeah, so this week is the pro bowl

[00:33:25] And then yeah, but on the AFC super bowl and as we know the super bowl is the cleveland Browns versus the oakland Raiders

[00:33:34] So bet on that

[00:33:36] fucking idiots

[00:33:38] You fucking piece of fucking gambling retard

[00:33:42] Oh, I should also mention that the shows for this week have been moved I had some problems with the

[00:33:47] uh

[00:33:48] The fucking venues and delware and Hartford there. Oh wait this episode comes out on the 23rd. Yeah on Wednesday

[00:33:54] Yeah, that's what I mean. Yeah. Yeah, which is today the 23rd was today what we're recording

[00:34:00] So if you were coming to Hartford, doa you've already got this episode is actually recorded on july 7th 2016

[00:34:06] Every episode of come so precious come down. Sure one non-stop conversation

[00:34:12] That happened two and a half years ago

[00:34:15] If we've now edited into pieces. I we should do that. We should just do random ass. I've been living in tahiti fucking natives

[00:34:21] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, nix kernel kurtz or whatever the fuck his name is nice dude. You got it. Oh, did I get it? Yeah?

[00:34:27] Is it hurts? Yeah, yeah

[00:34:30] So when you sign up make sure you use promo code cum 120 so they know we sent you when you sign up

[00:34:34] You've got some options you can just play and cash out or you can take the bonus money

[00:34:38] Which is like getting a casino comp up front before you've played at the tables

[00:34:42] It has a rollover requirement, but it's free cash

[00:34:44] So if you're gonna be in the sports book, which is where we like we love being the sports

[00:34:48] I love being in the sports book

[00:34:50] You can use promo code cum 120 up to a thousand dollars

[00:34:53] You're gonna give you 60 bonus cash which would turn a thousand dollars into 1600 to play with

[00:34:58] And we know you guys like playing with

[00:35:03] NPSi.com come on 20. Let's start the show

[00:35:07] Yo, what if the s stands for sports book? Yeah. Oh, yeah

[00:35:11] Bet the sports the sports book and incredibly yeah, nice. I guess we figured it out. Yep

[00:35:17] I do think it's you I don't trust a company that won't tell you what it stands for

[00:35:22] That's so true. I think you guys should be suspicious of them. No, no

[00:35:26] You should not

[00:35:28] No, still use their service and give them their money your money, but be very suspicious

[00:35:33] Yeah, furrow your brow while you do it for yeah, make sure you do a lot of brow furrow

[00:35:38] Brow furrowing um

[00:35:40] But yeah hard for the delo we're gonna happen in a different week guys

[00:35:43] But still come see me in san diego and l.a. San diego on the 27th l.a. On the second

[00:35:49] And then come to funny mums, which is uh, I don't fucking know the 28th. I won't be here unfortunately

[00:35:55] But we got a great lineup for you joe list

[00:35:59] You'll be there

[00:36:01] Somebody else will also be some other people

[00:36:06] Ah

[00:36:07] Fuck brando. What's up, man? So you're not fucking these def hoes. No more. No, I'm seeing somebody

[00:36:12] I pissed in her bed

[00:36:15] Sexually or no, man. It's don't you get into piss shit. No, I don't like that. Wait, you don't like have you tried it?

[00:36:21] What no, I'm in the shower once I pissed on a girl, but more is a joke. Yeah

[00:36:27] What like it's like a jellyfish thing kind of thing or like in the mouth no on her leg, you know

[00:36:34] It wasn't sexual. I don't like it sexually. You should try it everybody should try it. I I'm open to it

[00:36:39] Lisa's talking about it becoming the sexual thing. No, I did

[00:36:44] I don't give a shit with liza is door. I just don't fuck with you on record as saying this like

[00:36:50] A year ago because I was doing a thing about like, you know, like everybody talking about eating ass or whatever. It's like oh shit

[00:36:56] I was eating ass when I was 16. That's the thing. You don't know fucking sick of this people saying what's new what I've been

[00:37:02] I start I ate ass before I even ate pussy, right?

[00:37:06] Yeah, I looked at what that in fucking middle school. I like to go fast

[00:37:12] You ate ass in middle school. Yes. I looked at girls asshole in middle school because I just thought that's what I just wanted to

[00:37:20] I just went with what I wanted to do and that's what I wanted to do

[00:37:24] And now two years ago. I got to hear everyone going eating ass is in exactly

[00:37:28] That's what's never out exactly and now people are going pissing the next big thing. Fuck you

[00:37:33] There's a guy there's guys that have been pissing in women's mouth since 1974

[00:37:38] Me but don't act like it's a new goddamn thing

[00:37:41] That's all I'm trying to do is preempt it because I there is gonna the pissing thing to start

[00:37:45] Maybe I just maybe I didn't see it yet

[00:37:46] Yeah, but I feel like the pissing thing is starting and I'm trying to before these fuckers. Sure and say look this is me

[00:37:53] I'm this is me buying our

[00:37:55] Bit not my bit. It's your bit protecting my client's interests

[00:37:59] Right

[00:38:01] Right. Yeah, he's number one. He's number one pisser. He's the number

[00:38:06] I'm sorry. I had to spell it all out. You've been a piss guy for a long time. I just don't know it

[00:38:11] It's whatever. Yeah, I'm it's I'm not into it. I'm open to it

[00:38:14] It can be some if a girl said piss in my mouth. I'd say I will gladly

[00:38:20] I fucking loved it. I'm not it doesn't get me off

[00:38:23] But you know what I mean if it gets her off

[00:38:25] You can't get you off. Yeah, you're pissing, but if it gets her off the great. Yeah, I'll write on board

[00:38:31] You know it doesn't get anyone off piss over your fucking face

[00:38:36] But uh no this was the non-sexuals don't cold sober. I'm sleeping over I pissed her and I

[00:38:43] As a drunk I never pissed the bed. Yeah, as a kid. I never pissed the bed all sudden out of nowhere

[00:38:49] As an adult all of a sudden out of nowhere three weeks into a relationship

[00:38:53] I pee the bed not and not like a

[00:38:56] Half-P and I wake up and then this is this is I wake up

[00:39:02] Hours later unrelated and I'm covered in this yeah, and so I'm lying there going how did she realize it?

[00:39:09] Well, she so she's sleeping and I'm going do I do I roll her?

[00:39:15] Rubbery

[00:39:17] Yeah, I would embarrass you but yeah, you're pussy leaked all of it

[00:39:22] You got so wet while you're sleeping that's everything

[00:39:25] I'm like is this is it is it smoth could I say I came you know like I don't know you squirted this

[00:39:32] You did this to me. I fucking I fucking had a wet dream

[00:39:36] That's how much yeah, it smells like ammonia. That's love come you know, but uh damn

[00:39:41] But she was cool about she works venti aside dot com by the way

[00:39:44] Right any industrial rate ammonia products

[00:39:49] Venti

[00:39:51] She works with toddlers so she goes I'm kind of used to this

[00:39:55] And you're I didn't want to I didn't want to be lumped in with that

[00:40:00] I was hoping I wouldn't get thrown in with

[00:40:03] I fucked

[00:40:05] I'm always fucking

[00:40:08] Uh, but yeah, man, that's like uh, uh, it should be like uh

[00:40:12] Uh, stone cold sober

[00:40:14] Don't cook sober and you know and it was like uh, it was like a relationship

[00:40:19] Builder like it should be sure you know in like a mag a woman magazine with her like let him piss the bed

[00:40:24] You want to you want to find out if he's right for you build an ikea shelf together

[00:40:28] It should be like pissed the bed three weeks in right?

[00:40:32] You'll find out if she's the girl, you know like uh, she had a bit great

[00:40:36] Maybe she tipped your fucking fingers in the warm water. Maybe she was trying to figure out how you'd react

[00:40:41] It could be I don't care she's you that that's the thing about that prank is

[00:40:46] If if if you don't care, it's not a prank the pranks on them true

[00:40:50] If they put your fingers in warm water and you piss yourself and you go

[00:40:54] Yeah, it's your fucking couch. Yeah

[00:40:57] A couple years ago though. I I had like maybe two beers before I went to sleep

[00:41:00] Yeah, and then I woke up and I was just like buzz. I don't know like why I did it. Maybe I sleep well

[00:41:06] I don't know but I remember being lucid. Yeah, but I got out of bed

[00:41:09] And my laptop was like on the ground next to my bed and I just started pissing all over my laptop

[00:41:14] And I was like, oh, that's not right. And then I went and just pissed in the corner of the room. Yeah

[00:41:19] And that's not right now this is right

[00:41:22] Uh, that was my that was my issue before I got sober. I never pissed a bed

[00:41:27] But I would do that a lot

[00:41:29] One time my mom one time I wake up. I'm like a home from college

[00:41:34] You know, I come downstairs my mom's like weird, you know

[00:41:37] Mm-hmm and I go what's what's what's what's the problem? She goes you don't know what you did last night

[00:41:43] You got what she goes you raped me

[00:41:48] Fuck you wait my ass

[00:41:50] You came home from middle school and ate my ass you drank my hide a

[00:41:55] Fuck me in the mouth

[00:41:58] And then you came too soon you eat the shit

[00:42:01] No, so I come out of the I come out of I came out of the bedroom

[00:42:05] And my mom was awake

[00:42:07] And my mom goes Brendan and apparently I didn't say anything and I just faced my mom

[00:42:12] She goes we were five feet away from each other and you just started you just pulled out your dick and started pissing

[00:42:18] I'm the ground five feet away from me as I'm looking in your face telling you to stop

[00:42:24] I go I don't know what to tell you. I don't know what to tell you, you know, sorry

[00:42:30] You kept muttering. I love you

[00:42:32] Yeah, mom. It's for you. Yeah, mommy. I love you

[00:42:39] Jesus Christ, that's all right

[00:42:41] My friend my buddy lived in a three-person dorm and he had one roommate

[00:42:45] He was just the biggest piece of shit

[00:42:47] He'd get blackout every weekend and just piss in a different place in the dorm

[00:42:50] He'd open up drawers and like a dresser. Yeah, he pissed in there. My friend was in bed with another girl

[00:42:55] He pissed on him the girl

[00:42:57] What? He came over to you like staggered drugs. That's just a good bit Trevor. Dude Trevor is in bed with a girl and then his roommate just pissing

[00:43:06] He peed on Phil. He peed on everyone. Yeah, ever

[00:43:11] Dana had a friend of the show Dana had like this roommate that lived down like a hall. Yeah, west coast Adam

[00:43:18] This guy lived down the hall and then the girl of next to her like in like the room next to her

[00:43:23] You know, it's like two rooms at the hall then this other guy so the guy who lived in the end of the hall

[00:43:28] Well, anyways like one morning the girl lives in the room next door. Just is like, oh wait

[00:43:33] What the fuck wait, you know, it's just like screaming or whatever and then you hear the guy be like oh

[00:43:38] I'm sorry. I'm sorry, you know

[00:43:41] And then like later the story is is that he had gotten up in the morning

[00:43:46] And slept walked into a room and started like shitting on her nightstand

[00:43:55] You just got the wind into it thinking it was the bathroom

[00:43:58] Well, see what I said that on the nightstand I just started forcing a turd out

[00:44:04] That's insane. I know

[00:44:06] Pissing is whatever

[00:44:09] Just like

[00:44:11] You stoop. I don't know what the fuck would you do? You squatting and shitting

[00:44:14] But that guy was such like you know, like just like sort of like a buttoned up dc guy

[00:44:20] Imagine like, oh, I'm sorry. I guess I had too many cabernets

[00:44:27] Last night at bar trivia that were fucking rules. Yeah, maybe I answered too many questions at bar trivia. Yeah, right

[00:44:35] I had a butter scotch candy at maybe after 5 p.m

[00:44:39] I

[00:44:41] I've been real into these youtube videos of this

[00:44:44] It's this British guy that went to prison in Arizona. He was like he became an ecstasy kingpin

[00:44:50] Oh, yeah, seven years in Arizona

[00:44:52] He does all these youtube videos where people just ask him questions about prison and he did this video

[00:44:57] He's not still in prison. No, he's out. He did this video about

[00:45:01] the greatest

[00:45:03] Shitslinger

[00:45:04] He's ever known of in prison because shitslinging is like, you know, for the it's it's for the guys

[00:45:10] And do we clear we're talking about like

[00:45:12] Like this is like not literal because that happens in prison also. No, this is literal. Oh literal

[00:45:17] This is literal

[00:45:18] Like a baboon

[00:45:19] Yes, then yes

[00:45:22] And they're mostly people that they're mostly people that have been

[00:45:27] Everything taken away from so they're lifers who

[00:45:30] Have their TVs taken away from so they have everything so it's like

[00:45:33] There's nothing you can really do this

[00:45:35] So this guy was known as the best shitslinger like there's also it's a sign like the guards couldn't come close

[00:45:41] I hope he has stirrups like like

[00:45:44] And he would he would like mix the shit to the right consistency keeping milk cartons

[00:45:49] He had all these

[00:45:50] He would make tubes of out of out of newspapers

[00:45:55] He'd make tubes to like shoot it out at the guard

[00:45:57] So they take him to shower one day and they're like they're so careful

[00:46:01] Which would be who is the sheriff? They check him

[00:46:05] They check him

[00:46:06] They come to get him out of the shower. He's been in the shower for you know 15 minutes, whatever

[00:46:10] They check him everywhere. They look in there. They're very careful. There's no holes. They he can't get out

[00:46:14] They look there's nowhere. He could have put any shit

[00:46:17] Uh, so they're like, okay, put your hands out

[00:46:21] official

[00:46:24] He gets cuffed up he starts walking down the hall. They're walking down the hall. Is he nude?

[00:46:28] What yeah, he's naked. They're walking down the hall back back to himself

[00:46:32] All of a sudden he just starts spraying shit out of his mouth

[00:46:37] He took his dump put it in his mouth and switched it around for 45

[00:46:44] He's got the turds in his mouth

[00:46:47] He's lit up the town square with turds out of his mouth

[00:46:51] He switched the shit around in his mouth to make it like a fountain and just

[00:46:55] Salute spraying the gosh. We're gonna have to get the Marsos in here

[00:47:00] And they're running around like fucking have it

[00:47:03] Oh, jesus christ the shit's in his mouth

[00:47:08] That's awesome

[00:47:10] All the prisoners like that guys

[00:47:11] That's the best shit slinger there ever was

[00:47:14] I'll tell you what's probably a lot better than having a bunch of human feces in your mouth is wearing boots from thursday boots

[00:47:20] Well, I agree I agree

[00:47:24] Thursday really good boots thursday boots.com is a boots company that

[00:47:29] sells boots

[00:47:31] You would think it's just on thursday's but it's not actually thursday is

[00:47:35] It's just a name. Yeah, I don't actually there's a band name thursday

[00:47:40] Why it's called that

[00:47:43] It doesn't matter but they're good as boots

[00:47:45] And you know the fucking they got the same shit that the big dick heritage brand

[00:47:51] Oh, yeah, good of you

[00:47:53] Special chicago leather

[00:47:55] They actually have bigger dicks than the heritage brands

[00:47:57] Yeah, because those motherfuckers charge the same fucking do the same shit for higher prices

[00:48:02] Buffalo for skin. That's right. I cut the dick tips off of buffalo. Oh, yeah, stretch them over

[00:48:08] Uh, uh, wing tips. Well, the feet of paraplegics. That's right. So these are feet that have never touched the ground of no soft

[00:48:16] Beautiful soft pristine shaped beautifully. Yeah, so you know they get these these handy cap kids

[00:48:23] And they chain them

[00:48:26] They're they're they're chain them up there with the buffalo. No, they're another room, but it's very nice and comfortable

[00:48:32] Yeah, they're like can I go home like it's not fucking thursday?

[00:48:36] I told you

[00:48:40] And they've got a calendar that she's only got one day wednesday tuesday friday saturday saturday

[00:48:45] Why don't you look at the calendar boy

[00:48:49] You and your game legs can go home all Thursday

[00:48:53] We got buffalo dick boots to make

[00:48:57] And that I think that's where it comes from. Yep, uh, that's correct

[00:49:01] So let me ask you prefer clunky work boots or delicate fashion boots cheap boots that fall apart after a few wears

[00:49:07] No, no

[00:49:08] $400 repair boots to barely get you through one season. No, all of these are possible at thursday

[00:49:13] Oh, no, no, hold on

[00:49:15] Well, here's not something right now. There's another option

[00:49:18] None of that bull's thursday boot company a four-year-old boots strapped startup

[00:49:23] They put bootstrap in quotation marks because it's sort of a good joke

[00:49:26] It's just it's but what they mean is that those children strapped to the ground basement

[00:49:33] Strapped the music common hence a four-year-old startup. No the company's been around for 10 years

[00:49:44] It has been shaking up the

[00:49:46] They have been shaking up the industry that is true. Yeah

[00:49:51] That you get the kids to be

[00:49:53] The shake of his an anything member create brainstem injuries so the industry the industry is the kid's name

[00:50:00] They've been shaking in my three years four years

[00:50:04] The industry you can go home on thursday boy

[00:50:08] You go home on thursday now shake your brother shake your baby brother

[00:50:16] You better hope these boots sell boy

[00:50:19] Hopefully that compact

[00:50:24] They do their job. Maybe i'll be thursday this week

[00:50:32] Um, oh wait here you go the brand started in 2014 the name thursday came about because on thursday you work hard

[00:50:36] But it's also the unofficial start of the weekend so true. That's what I always said. That's so true

[00:50:43] That's weird because I thought it I thought they sent the four-year-old paraplegics home on thursday

[00:50:48] It is that's what I always thought that first day boots the first boot company

[00:50:53] They allowed Ian finance to name

[00:50:58] Boom shakalaga boots. Yeah, I had the best name for a shoe company

[00:51:03] It's thursday cuz on thursday. It's the weekend

[00:51:07] You work hard, but it's the weekend you should be allowed to be gay on thursday

[00:51:13] And your dad look at that from heaven doesn't get sad

[00:51:16] He's doing a bar mitzvah opening for jerry sign fell

[00:51:20] To some trust fund cake you should be able to suck dick in a movie theater

[00:51:28] Ex-name on the big sucking material

[00:51:35] It's okay to blow guys for crack

[00:51:39] Like I didn't who booked him this

[00:51:41] It's an outdoor ed event. Yeah, fucking middle school

[00:51:47] All right guys, we got a comedian for lunch

[00:51:53] Thursday work arbors on the unofficial

[00:51:55] Durbal enough to take a serious beating. Oh, come on. There's too much in this copy that feeds into the paraplegic

[00:52:03] Durbal enough to take a serious beating and sophisticated enough to clean up for a date. So they beaten fuck the kids

[00:52:09] That's right. Yeah, yeah, the kids are sophisticated. Clean up boy. Why is it thursday? No?

[00:52:17] It's Friday. What happened so Wednesday?

[00:52:22] Girl, that's right. You gotta be a girl

[00:52:26] Don't cry now. You know you can't feel it with your numb ass

[00:52:31] You ain't got nothing past c3 don't act like you feel nothing going inside you

[00:52:35] I could feel it in my soul. That's right. You could feel it in your soul. That's what keeps the boots off

[00:52:47] Anyways, Thursday boots are built for men and women who understand quality and want a good looking pair of boots that will last a few seasons

[00:52:54] Made in the same north american manufacturing facilities as the heritage brands your parents and grandparents wore

[00:53:00] Not adam's grandparents because they had their shoes taken away from them when they got to the camps

[00:53:04] Mm-hmm. This is a three-time surprise

[00:53:07] Thursday boots are not only a better value, but they use better materials too like the famous chrome excel leather from the four ween tannery in chicago

[00:53:15] Oh, yeah, that's good shit. Now

[00:53:19] The four ween tannery. I mean really they put that in here and it's like do people know what that is

[00:53:26] I'm a boot game. Maybe I just like the idea for you lived in chicago, right? No, no

[00:53:30] You're just from the midwest. I just always assume every midwest comic goes to chicago before new york

[00:53:37] fucking insulting

[00:53:39] I just like the idea of the guys if you have a black eyes. I'm like you from africa

[00:53:46] Come you went to africa for comedy. I like the guys that uh

[00:53:51] Thursday thursday's boots

[00:53:53] being like

[00:53:55] He did a he did a the adory. We we got a lot of sales from comets how the adory was it was largely about uh

[00:54:05] child

[00:54:07] molestation the child was paralyzed and then

[00:54:10] At the end I thought that was gonna be the end of it and then he did a holocaust. Yeah. Yeah, that wasn't my favorite part

[00:54:16] Just thinking that in there. They're like uh, well, hold on. We have to shoot on the tannery too

[00:54:23] Yeah, we have to shoot on the tannery, but it's from the whore ween tannery. So I don't know look that up. I guess it's good. How do you spell that?

[00:54:30] um

[00:54:32] gay

[00:54:37] A historical tannery in chicago because I don't know if any of you guys have ever read uh the jungle

[00:54:43] Oh, of course. We've already yeah, we were in sing Claire. Yeah, the good job homework the beef industry in chicago is like

[00:54:50] Notoriously like the worst place in the history of places. Yeah, but you're not gonna

[00:54:56] Do you think the leather comes from

[00:54:59] Well from from abuse

[00:55:01] We've already chapter the jungle entitled it's not thursday

[00:55:07] It's wednesday girl. Yeah, you don't know how the boots. Okay. So yeah, this is

[00:55:13] They look I'm not saying look you can't say that they look they're not they can't get mad at that because it's like a lot of

[00:55:18] Boot companies do that. That's just how that's how boots are if you want to make glue you got to kill a horse

[00:55:23] Yeah, you know, I mean if you line up a horse bad boots then get a then use a kid that's not paralyzed

[00:55:29] Right. We've got some boots from china where the children just make the shoe

[00:55:32] I gotta say these leathers look really nice at the whore ween tannery. Yeah, so the call to action here with prices starting at

[00:55:40] 149 and

[00:55:41] Shipping returns free shipping returns mom Mia thursday boots are the best buy for this winter and with their clean timeless design and durability

[00:55:48] Thursday boots will keep you standing comfortably for years to come. I have fucked up feet. I'm wearing something right now. Yeah

[00:55:55] They're nice. You can't say they're not I don't even know what the fuck this company was but like before they even

[00:56:02] Sponsor is like everybody. Yeah, but my cousin was wearing them and then yeah

[00:56:06] My cousin already had a pair and then his mom got him like a gift certificate to the company anyways

[00:56:11] You see that so people like people like my cousin who's not a fucking retard that has a podcast

[00:56:17] He's a normal person with a regular job that he has to show up to he's in a successful relationship

[00:56:22] Yes smiling all sounds fucking gay fucking text me every like month or two like we got to see each other. Oh, we don't bitch

[00:56:29] I have to play video games. You do not need to see each other

[00:56:32] I want to but I can't bring myself to attach to anyone even people I've known my entire life

[00:56:38] Who I genuinely have feelings for and I can't bring myself to say I love you too

[00:56:43] So that's kind of who the boots are that's yeah

[00:56:45] So if you could say if you've said I love you to any if you ever loved it, well, you know what I'm sorry

[00:56:49] I'm sorry this is for our fan base

[00:56:52] No

[00:56:55] Just buy the fucking

[00:56:57] Stupid ass I give a tip to your fans. Yeah, uh-huh. Uh, you know, and this is this

[00:57:05] Relates right into the boots. Yeah, you know my dad. He's from Ireland. You know, they don't have a lot of feelings

[00:57:11] Yeah, he never he never told me he loved me then I uh then I hung myself

[00:57:17] And uh now he tells me he loves me. Whoa. Yeah, so all you got to do

[00:57:21] If you got one of these dads that don't say aren't good with the feelings hang yourself unsuccessfully

[00:57:28] Uh, and they'll start some time saying that make a loose ass not with a fucked up little blanket or whatever

[00:57:36] Yeah, you know and then for me. It's kind of a boy who cried wolf

[00:57:40] I mean, I don't I don't be a dick or anything man

[00:57:41] But like you know we have a relationship with these companies if you can't say like yeah

[00:57:46] Well, no, but I what I'm saying

[00:57:48] You're gonna get a shit like that. You're gonna be getting you're gonna drop by this. Yeah. No, I know

[00:57:53] Fucking Chris Gethard over here

[00:57:55] You know, he's your little Chris Gethard hour

[00:57:59] Anyways, uh, light brand

[00:58:03] Just chill out all right

[00:58:06] You should about your fucking mick dad in his stupid feeling

[00:58:09] Relax. Well, they don't do sales or discouts head over to thursday boots dot com slash town town

[00:58:16] Yeah, I wonder why they chose that

[00:58:19] That's thursday boots dot com slash to wn and get free shipping and returns and use our links to the boots people

[00:58:27] No, we sent you no we sent you let's let's start the show. Let's start the show

[00:58:32] Let's start the fucking show. All right. Go mites

[00:58:35] I'll tell you what dude. Mm-hmm. Lewis is kind of like Cosby

[00:58:40] It's like the impression doesn't need to be like anywhere close to what Lewis actually sounds

[00:58:44] Oh, just do that. Yeah. Oh god. I'm a son. I'm gay. I'm gay

[00:58:51] I'm gay for this is cookie monster

[00:58:56] Seek is for penis

[00:58:58] That's good enough for me

[00:59:00] But but cock monsters see see stands for cock. No, it's done for penis

[00:59:07] But that's not you're teaching the children the wrong thing are you saying there's something wrong with being gay

[00:59:12] The children really know that no which is that's just not the alphabet

[00:59:17] I'm going to get you fired

[00:59:20] That's what cock come on see is for penis. That's like that's not technically correct. What do you mean by that?

[00:59:26] No, no, no, no, no, no, no eat all the the penis you want. It's just see doesn't stand for penis cock monster

[00:59:34] I love cock. How dare you? I love cock. I'm telling I'm going to tell

[00:59:40] I'm blogging about this. I'm telling on you

[00:59:44] What is your immediate supervisors?

[00:59:46] Female and his boss also I took a video. I'm going to own you shipotle

[00:59:57] Uh

[00:59:59] That is karaoke

[01:00:01] Wow great. Well last time out of the break you gave us the pissing story anything else Brendan. I don't know man, you know, I

[01:00:11] She

[01:00:12] The girl's bed. I peed in

[01:00:14] Mm-hmm. Yep. She watches a kid, you know and uh

[01:00:18] Baby sits that seems to be like the job everyone has to have like rich people just

[01:00:23] It's like no rich person ever looks after the toddlers is the piss all over the bed

[01:00:27] He's like fuck was he a while he's gone

[01:00:31] We

[01:00:35] It's just a Chinese

[01:00:37] I fuck dare you. We're babysitting a 43 year old

[01:00:44] Last time I'm not fuck baby

[01:00:47] I'm not fuck baby. I'll go woman

[01:00:50] I did you let me go outside right now

[01:00:55] I did catch her fucking a three-year-old

[01:00:59] But not you have a seat over here. She babysits. She's just ballsed the

[01:01:03] And uh, she's you be a sec Chris. Yeah. Yeah

[01:01:08] We caught the decoy

[01:01:12] We have to give it a second before we cap week

[01:01:16] According to Arizona law

[01:01:19] He has to actually be fucking the toddler before yeah

[01:01:23] They reveal

[01:01:25] Once you have a seat over here

[01:01:27] No one ever

[01:01:29] How come no one ever says

[01:01:31] Oh, I knew this was you like that's it. That would be my thing. I would say no. I knew this

[01:01:37] I knew that I was trying to get on yeah, I thought about this

[01:01:41] I could tell this was fake. So I was like well, I'm gonna try to find a book you catch you

[01:01:45] There's Hanson and just come on. Yeah, talk. Yeah, I knew this

[01:01:49] I just like the show because it's like what is the crime they were talking to an adult

[01:01:53] No, no, no, they're they're like sending cockpicks and like yeah, but it was an adult the whole time

[01:01:59] But they think it's a child the kids they're like but if you say I knew it wasn't if you say this was a fantasy

[01:02:06] But if you I wasn't dealing with a guy if you if you buy fake drugs from a police officer

[01:02:11] It's like still like you're trying to do something. I don't know

[01:02:14] I don't know the actual lee galley, but there's a way there's a way that they can like

[01:02:18] Maybe in the chat you guys got a real thing against a guy trying to fuck a 13 year

[01:02:23] Let me put it this way. I'm like I I hear where you're coming from. I also like I hated that show

[01:02:29] I like a huge problem with that show because it's like it's not really journalism

[01:02:33] Yeah, it's sort of this morbid fascination right? Yeah, and it's like these people

[01:02:37] Like you don't know like if they haven't offended yet

[01:02:40] What should be happening is like hey, this is in private. This is a fucking wake-up call

[01:02:45] Here's something that the state pays for to get you help so you don't ever actually

[01:02:49] Do they sign the release so that they get like a reduced sentence? I think because they're like committing a crime

[01:02:56] You can show their face. No, that's always been what I've heard about cops is that is that if you're found guilty

[01:03:03] You have no right you give which I think it's in the which is in the public interest. Which is fucked up

[01:03:08] It's crazy. Here's the thing

[01:03:10] You can like you can there's certain things you can do that if they're in the quote-unquote public interest

[01:03:14] You're like allowed to do it. I don't need a relief

[01:03:16] Yeah, if you do something that like creates emotional distress to somebody that you it's like you can make an argument that it's like in the

[01:03:22] Like is that why is that why the guy from girls gone wild didn't get any releases?

[01:03:27] Because he's like this in the public interest have these big ass titties out there

[01:03:29] Did he not get releases on a lot of girls? He didn't yeah, I don't I don't know

[01:03:33] I mean, I don't know I have no fucking idea about any of this shit

[01:03:36] No, I know I know I was joking that showing titties is in the public interest. Yeah

[01:03:41] Because

[01:03:43] Something

[01:03:46] Wrong with you to like your passion is to pretend to be a child and have cyber sex online all day long

[01:03:52] Well, I mean, I know you got to catch these guys

[01:03:55] Like I know the police have to catch these guys, but it's just I always had a huge problem with cops

[01:04:00] Yeah, but it comes up and not to be like it takes one to know one kind of thing

[01:04:04] But it is like you're a pedophile Brendan. No, I mean I mean like to be that hyper focused on

[01:04:11] Like oh, yeah, like I'm protecting children

[01:04:14] It's like you should be suspicious of that guy because there was that there was in like Prince Williams County

[01:04:20] I think there was some like fucking detective. It was unreasoned.com

[01:04:23] There was like a big story about some kid that got arrested because he sent his like he was 16

[01:04:28] He sent his like oh, I remember this guy

[01:04:30] Like a picture of his dad the dad saw it the girls dad saw it

[01:04:34] They arrested the girl they arrested the boy they arrested the boy for like

[01:04:38] Soliciting sex from a minor they arrested him for production of child pornography for taking a picture of his

[01:04:45] 16 they were both children. Yeah, and and this was great. Yeah, and the the

[01:04:51] Detective in charge of the case had the kid in custody took him to the hospital so they could inject like I don't know

[01:04:57] C Alice or something and it was dicked to get his dick hard so he could take pictures of his dick hard

[01:05:02] As evidence prove that it was the picture

[01:05:05] His day never mind the fact that the phone it shows that it came from his phone

[01:05:09] He wanted supplementary pictures of this child's penis to help solidify the case

[01:05:15] Martin I think we got a million

[01:05:17] No, no, we got to get him to the hospital no one stopped him

[01:05:20] The the staff at the hospital didn't stop him the fucking like d8 and stop him other people in the department didn't stop him

[01:05:26] This man was allowed to like get medically get this kid's dick hard traumatize him inject a fucking syringe and do like is how are the fuck they do it

[01:05:34] I'm gonna assume they stick a giant needle into your dick

[01:05:38] Bluetooth the officer

[01:05:40] Lollipop

[01:05:42] Has it on his mouth and he applies it to the boys penis

[01:05:45] publicly so six months later. There's like a child pornography staying of course that direct detective his house comes out

[01:05:52] He's just says he's

[01:05:54] Has dozens of images on computer and he blows his brains out before they can get there

[01:05:59] They're like taking down the door he kills himself

[01:06:00] But it's like there should have been some kind of like red flag there

[01:06:04] Yeah, I mean not so far as the extreme of like okay

[01:06:08] Obviously the guy like getting this kid's dick hard to take pictures of it

[01:06:11] Yeah, but like I am suspicious of like people are like yeah

[01:06:15] I pretend to be a child online all day long to try and get pedophiles. Yeah, well, it's always it's always the guys like I

[01:06:22] recently listened to this thing about

[01:06:24] This guy who was the head of

[01:06:26] One of the

[01:06:31] largest gay conversion therapy programs there ever was

[01:06:39] Christian one not you know in the old days

[01:06:43] One

[01:06:47] How about

[01:06:49] Nice don't want to be gay five dollars six dollars. I'm not gay anymore. Just give me the money

[01:06:57] So this guy a complete success

[01:07:00] this guy was like he ran this thing and oh yeah, those are always gay and like

[01:07:09] Dozens of kids killed themselves, you know, it's like you can't it's not a thing like you know like gay conversions and out of things

[01:07:15] Well, we turn them into a different kind of yeah, we made them hate themselves

[01:07:21] Well, it's still gay, but it's a different type of gay

[01:07:23] Yeah, so at least a step in the right direction and then of course the this thing I'm listening to is like we caught up to John in

[01:07:30] 2010 in Texas where he lives with his husband

[01:07:34] It's like you know fucking shit like of course he's gay like you know

[01:07:39] And you know it's probably those kids probably killed himself because they were being molested at the fucking camp

[01:07:43] Yeah, well and not even it's not even a trauma that's not that it's not yet that it's not traumatic

[01:07:49] Right somebody tell you it should be gay, but yeah, probably that guy was a pedophile. Yeah at the very least he beat off to them

[01:07:55] Yeah, well very yes

[01:07:57] I mean, I mean the whole thing is it's fucking well. We should do here's what we should do

[01:08:01] Yeah, the world is an entirely fucked up place and children just shouldn't exist

[01:08:06] Yeah, I like you right we should make them adults quickly. No, I mean look that's my plan

[01:08:10] We need to reverse population growth. I mean yeah children should be illegal

[01:08:15] It feels like they're just getting molested anyways. Mm-hmm. You know, I don't think population's I don't need I don't need

[01:08:21] I don't need any more X-Men movies

[01:08:23] You know if that's a trade-off. No more children in molest. We don't get any more X-Men movies

[01:08:30] Yeah, I said that I don't know how the fuck Brian Singer came out just bulletproof as hell his movie wanted a Golden Globe

[01:08:36] Yeah, it's almost like there's a

[01:08:38] Conspirator giant network wait. Is he back? Yeah, dude

[01:08:46] Ten million dollar directing deal he's yeah, it's back no consequences

[01:08:51] Well, they didn't thank him at the Golden Globe, so but he is taking these creditors director on it. Is he?

[01:09:01] Moon ves is that how you say it how it's like it's like success

[01:09:04] He doesn't get a hundred and twenty million dollars not only that he's fighting for it

[01:09:09] Yeah, you may get it. You may get it and the people are like this is step in the right direction

[01:09:14] You know it's like no, it's a fucking disgusting trap. He's also already a billionaire. Yeah, not going to jail right

[01:09:20] Yeah, someone should kill him. They what I'm not saying you should but theoretically if you want justice

[01:09:28] There are a lot of people that should be killed

[01:09:30] We probably shouldn't say somebody should probably kill him about somebody that you should probably kill on the show

[01:09:39] The certain people where it's just funny. Yeah, you know if I say somebody should murder Brian Cranston, right?

[01:09:45] That is funny. Yeah, because I don't want I don't deal with post-breaking bad Brian Cranston

[01:09:52] Being in a fake wheelchair and squaring scarves

[01:09:55] Dude that way poster of Kevin Hart riding on the back of the wheelchair with Brian Cranston smiling is so funny

[01:10:03] Yeah, just the picture is so funny just in that picture. It's like like, you know, like we're acting

[01:10:09] Look at my way. They were acting were such actors and whatever this fucking piece of shit movie is some French movie that they're just

[01:10:16] Yeah, yeah, they speak French. No, no, they're remaking a French movie. Oh, yeah, I thought it was a guy

[01:10:21] I thought it was a real guy. No

[01:10:23] Yeah, they just made that movie up it might be rude

[01:10:28] Yeah, probably what the fuck that's what movies are man

[01:10:32] Understand that but I thought for sure that was one of the ones like a guy

[01:10:36] That's kind that's the one where I'm like, oh if you didn't you just wrote that that's I don't stand for a movie

[01:10:41] I'm about a movie called I comma Sam and Toby's like ladies and gentlemen. Not only is this man retarded. He's also a robot

[01:10:49] I

[01:10:51] Robot can't raise an eight year old especially not a retarded

[01:10:56] You know, you ever saw in a you ever see children of men

[01:11:00] In rules, but ever saw that you never they didn't show the panicked pedophiles. Yeah, you know as children are

[01:11:08] Angle just one guy like fuck man. There's no

[01:11:13] Damn, what were those petaphiles?

[01:11:15] They brought that movie they brought that the script for that the dream works and the guys reading he's like

[01:11:21] What do you mean? There's a horror move?

[01:11:26] The most disgusting thing I've ever read

[01:11:30] No way no way will I do never be me no one will some things aren't even funny to joke about

[01:11:36] Yeah, I bet that happened. Yeah, probably honestly

[01:11:47] Yeah, that was moon vision is fucking ridiculous. I know

[01:11:51] He would he rape or so straight straight up just rape dude. It's just like it's just not even

[01:11:58] Yeah, damn. He was one of the most powerful people in media. Yeah, it's funny

[01:12:02] It's like you know just like calling someone's office like yeah, you know somebody that's in like it's not unreasonable

[01:12:08] This isn't like a Louie thing like don't go back to his hotel. Right. It's it's he's all in the building

[01:12:13] You're a fucking actress and it's like yeah

[01:12:15] That like the head of like development. What's that a meeting with you?

[01:12:18] It's fucking three o'clock in the afternoon, right?

[01:12:20] And then you go in there and he's like come take a look at this and he like pulls his dick out and shoves your fucking head on

[01:12:25] Yeah, it's like did but it is fucking rape

[01:12:28] I see what you mean about not joking about killing him because he should be dead. Yeah, yeah

[01:12:34] Yeah, and then well like you know, it's like well, you know, it's kind of a he said she said he said it was consensual

[01:12:40] It's like you have like that's come on man. Yeah

[01:12:43] It doesn't fall under the like all it's an abusive power thing. It's just rape

[01:12:47] I mean, it's like no other way to fuck. Yeah. Yeah. I don't think he should get up at the cellar personally. Yeah, yeah less

[01:12:53] No way you're doing spots, bro. You're not welcome. I'm not booking. Yeah

[01:13:01] But then it's like that it's even on the table that it's like well

[01:13:04] We don't know whether we should give him the hundred and twenty dollars severance pack. Yeah

[01:13:09] Well, he's literally has the balls to sue for he's suing for it right now

[01:13:13] Like and then someone asked people ask someone asked Chuck Laurie who you know made a bunch of money

[01:13:17] And he's like hey, that's above my pay grade just to say whether he's a rapist is like first of all Chuck

[01:13:23] Laurie you made yeah a billion dollars on doing half men who is richer than you man. Yeah, yeah above my

[01:13:31] Making a way

[01:13:34] What do you think you make you idiot? Yeah, you get you get he's literally saying listen my silence has been bought

[01:13:40] Yeah, right right. He's saying I'm afraid. Yeah, just saying negative

[01:13:47] Beyond the afraid I've been paid off to protect a rapist. Yeah, and that's all I'm gonna say

[01:13:56] Yeah, yeah, he'd like to say that he's been paid the money

[01:14:01] She's prison videos. I'd like to watch that one question they asked the guy was

[01:14:05] Will Jerry because now this is like the with the third. It's why I love any YouTube series

[01:14:11] That's guys who got out of prison and we'll answer prison questions. I like J. Leno's garage

[01:14:18] And there's this one British guy who's particularly like willing to answer any is that the guy that went to Arizona for ecstasy?

[01:14:23] Yeah, you know one of the questions was will will they kill Bill Cosby and what this guy said was it will be up to

[01:14:32] First of all, he'll automatically be in protective custody because he's such a big name

[01:14:36] Right without you know right away, right?

[01:14:39] Doesn't even have to be an incident, but that doesn't matter. They can still

[01:14:43] Especially if you're that big a name they can still get to you, you know, I mean they got to whitey bulger, right?

[01:14:49] And what he said what this guy said is it will be up to his race. It'll be up to the blacks in whatever prison he's in

[01:14:57] Because that's just how prison is you deal with your own

[01:14:59] Like it would it would start trouble if if a white if the area in brotherhood or the mexican mafia if they killed him

[01:15:06] It would start trouble. It's up to your own

[01:15:09] Met out discipline so how big a posby fan

[01:15:13] Well what he said will have likely happened is that they will fucking bleed him dry

[01:15:19] And then maybe they'll kill him but first they'll just extort the shit out of him for protection to stay alive

[01:15:26] They'll basically be like, you know, you you you're paying for all of our commissary

[01:15:31] You're there you need to meet you need to have someone on the outside and meet this guy and give him x amount of money

[01:15:37] You know that he was like he'll just be you need to sag your pants. Yeah, he was like he'll be bled dry of money

[01:15:42] Holy holy for the whole time. He's in there. That's that's pretty good. Yeah. Yeah, I mean

[01:15:46] Did you think like always old who cares?

[01:15:49] It's up to the Jews to kill subway Jared

[01:15:52] Yeah, and they are historically a very weak prison population. That's not true. We take we take care of our

[01:16:00] Justice. Yeah, how many Jews are in jail? Oh, there's actually not a single one

[01:16:07] subway Jared

[01:16:10] That's well the interesting thing about Jews in jail is that you

[01:16:14] Depending on the prison can't join the area brother. Yes, you can. That's what's interesting

[01:16:18] Well, that's that's always been my first thought. It's like how do I like yeah, you do that Adam Adam would be fun

[01:16:24] It's me

[01:16:27] That's always prison and that's always been like besides the ass rape and all this stuff

[01:16:31] It's like my biggest fear is like

[01:16:34] How would would I convince the area and brother? Yeah, no, they don't care. They don't care. It's a white thing

[01:16:38] Yeah, it's not the swastikas and all that like they don't they don't they probably aren't gonna love that you're a Jew

[01:16:44] but like they don't

[01:16:46] Chances for advancement within the ranch

[01:16:50] Does anyone know when Easter is

[01:16:54] I hear it's right around the corner. Oh, I just love wearing my cross. I love the way it feels

[01:17:01] That's interesting. Huh the juice. So yeah, they'll take Jews, huh?

[01:17:05] Yeah, they because they they whoever is in control of the whites like as would be who your crew is like

[01:17:11] So you might not necessarily join the area in brotherhood, but if they controlled the whites in your prison or your block

[01:17:18] That would be who you answered you and they wouldn't they wouldn't kill you just for being a Jew

[01:17:23] You know you'd be part of the white crew interesting. I watched a couple of those like prison videos

[01:17:27] I remember seeing one that was like how to continue bodybuilding in prison

[01:17:32] And it was this guy that got out and he was like it's very tough man

[01:17:34] You know to get the right amount of protein and calories in or whatever

[01:17:37] He was still like, you know, jacked just jack, but it's just so funny that that's like a concern in the bodybuilding communities

[01:17:43] What if I go to prison and I can't hit my back

[01:17:49] Right. Yeah, that is a tough time in your life to lose muscle mass. Yeah, you want to be as jacked as possible

[01:17:55] Well, no, probably not you want to be like kind of down to like a fighting weight. You want to be all bulky

[01:18:00] But if you're strong, yeah, this isn't really carry over

[01:18:02] That would be so funny if I if I was a prison you guys visited me and like my head was shaved and I was like listen guys

[01:18:09] 1488 like

[01:18:12] We gotta do something about these juice

[01:18:15] That would be awesome. No joke. I would love it if you went full anti-scent but I want the phone

[01:18:19] I'm like but adam you're and then stab I take the phone away and he's like

[01:18:29] What I meant to say is you're not you

[01:18:31] anyways

[01:18:32] Yeah, podcast is going great

[01:18:37] It's just okay

[01:18:40] Just having quadruple just

[01:18:44] You know no one can tell the adam bot

[01:18:50] No one could tell it's not you

[01:18:52] I hope cool Adam does a great job

[01:18:54] Yeah, what are you in prison for?

[01:19:02] I don't know it's not illegal

[01:19:05] The way you do it it is no, it's so gay that the cops like no

[01:19:10] Nothing this game

[01:19:17] He's in prison for

[01:19:19] Providing like false test in order to a law enforcement officer when he gets so addicted to snitching. He's just making up

[01:19:28] He's like I don't have any this

[01:19:35] I saw some black guys rape a grandma

[01:19:40] All right, who wasn't snitch Adam

[01:19:42] I'm doing the crime who was doing the crime. Yeah, you're fucking season season five

[01:19:51] McNuddy

[01:19:54] Fuck. Yeah, what are we saying Brendan? Oh, man. I'll tell you I don't remember no worries

[01:20:00] What was it?

[01:20:02] You're like did you guys see oh yeah

[01:20:09] Guy and four

[01:20:11] Was he worked at a he worked at a wildlife

[01:20:16] And he was fucking an alligator

[01:20:22] And another alligator came up behind him and killed him

[01:20:28] Really? Yeah, he was fucking an alligator

[01:20:30] That's because man, it's all about what race you are

[01:20:34] Not as wild by bark. I love that because bestiality is so uh confined to like cows and dogs

[01:20:42] You know, there's like three animals and all of these like now fucking i'm gonna fucking alligator

[01:20:47] You imagine how fucked up that alligator must because like they lay eggs

[01:20:51] Like they're from a time when fucking didn't exist. They're dinosaurs. Yeah, and dude the fucking

[01:20:57] Big-ass alligator got furious. He was killing this pussy. He killed him. Yeah, that's my biggest. Yeah, that's my biggest dude

[01:21:05] That's wild. Yeah

[01:21:07] You're 23 girl guys name was Jimmy Olsen like from uh superman

[01:21:11] Wait, what is crocodile pussy even feel I don't even he was an expert probably you'd have to be an expert. Wait. It's not this guy. Is it

[01:21:20] Is it that guy because this is on snow since this didn't happen

[01:21:22] No, no, no, this is this was in the news this week. Oh, florida man has been arrested after a port

[01:21:27] He was tranquilizing alligators in the everywhere legs and then raping no, that's that's no no

[01:21:32] This sounds real. I want to believe it's real. No, it's real. I saw it on cnn

[01:21:36] Yeah

[01:21:38] CNN let me tell you they had a story the other day about a man having sex with alligator

[01:21:42] Can you imagine if cnn accidentally?

[01:21:44] Ran that story and how much how much how much trump would have

[01:21:48] If that turned out to be bullshit and say you would hear about the alligator say every single day is it this guy? Yes

[01:21:55] Yes, hold on. Let me see. Oh wow that guy's amazing. Yes. Yeah

[01:21:59] He's perfect. Oh, yeah, dude

[01:22:02] He looks like that kind of like person that's really a woman

[01:22:05] Yeah, you can't tell if it's a man or a woman

[01:22:07] A ziggy was killed this morning in the alligator enclosure of the navel zoo while he was attempting to sexually assault a 12-foot long reptile

[01:22:19] According to captain henry white spokesman of the navel's police department

[01:22:23] 24-year-old jimmy ulsen was engaged in full sexual intercourse with one of the younger

[01:22:29] She was fucking a baby alligator

[01:22:31] It's better be a big one the young man was caught by the throat by the alligator who dragged him underwater and drowned him

[01:22:41] Oh no. Oh no, this says it's fake. It's fair. It was on CNN. Oh, fuck someone get this

[01:22:47] Not a bin on CNN fuck

[01:22:50] Damn it. Oh fuck. I was so excited about this

[01:22:54] I was so excited about being on CNN

[01:22:56] Can can can can you reverse google image search that guy because whoever he is he he raped probably?

[01:23:02] Well, that's a rough deal when they just use your

[01:23:07] For a viral story about fucking alligator

[01:23:10] Some guy who loves reptiles

[01:23:13] Dedicated his life to them. Oh, actually he raped every day

[01:23:17] He goes on the google. I mean he's like no, I don't fuck alligators. I've never fucked an alligator

[01:23:26] That's beautiful man. Yeah, no. Yeah

[01:23:29] Shit, that's I normally don't fall for that. That's all right, man. Got me. They got me. It's okay

[01:23:34] It's so good. I wanted to believe it. That's I understand wanting to believe. Yeah, I truly do

[01:23:39] That's so funny. Yeah, bummer

[01:23:43] Bummer

[01:23:44] But you do never get a guy

[01:23:46] That's into like

[01:23:48] It's always it's a beastiality is always horses. Yes dogs

[01:23:53] Cows and sheep you never get a guy that's like I just got an all-out-of-the-sarg. Yeah, silently fucking yeah

[01:24:00] Yeah, just a turtle

[01:24:02] Yeah, what's the weirdest animal you fuck that I would outside of the brow? Yeah

[01:24:20] Put it in my head. I told you it's me

[01:24:22] Yeah

[01:24:29] What animal you think has the best pussy I think horse pussy is the best it's probably big though

[01:24:35] Now horse pussy is huge man. Yeah, but it's still probably good. It's probably good

[01:24:39] Here's I I'm only basing this and I've told the story

[01:24:42] I'm just gonna google what I looked because we were trying to get my friend

[01:24:46] I've talked about before we're trying to get our friend ramsie

[01:24:49] Index with a kid college to have sex with a horse and he was like no man. I would never do that

[01:24:53] We're like come on. We'll throw it wall. We were all gonna pitch in like a hundred bucks

[01:24:56] Each we're gonna give him five hundred dollars to fuck a horse my friend lived on a farm. Yeah

[01:25:01] And he was like I'm not doing it

[01:25:03] I don't care how much money and then we showed him a picture of a horse pussy and he was like

[01:25:09] The horse pussy looked good dude, right Adam doesn't look good one time. I got an answer according to

[01:25:15] Google okay damn look at the size of a

[01:25:19] uterus

[01:25:20] Yeah, but the fucking size of a basketball nice, but the pussy's small though, right? No

[01:25:27] No, yeah, they gotta give birth to us like the size of my entire arm

[01:25:31] Yeah, apparently they did a study and said that who's vanity?

[01:25:35] Manatee pussy is the closest to human push in the animal kingdom

[01:25:40] That's what mermaids are probably they gotta track down the guy. Did that study?

[01:25:47] So funny this is from bodybuilding calm

[01:25:51] It's a big bit that's why

[01:25:54] Dementity pussy yes, I'm a scientist. Don't fuck you mean as you a scientist

[01:26:02] I got a clipboard don't I what a fuck your lab code at?

[01:26:07] anyways

[01:26:08] I digress back to my results

[01:26:11] Manatee pussy feel like big bitch

[01:26:16] Because because the blubber see no that's why I'm saying she let she go

[01:26:20] She can be loving on your dick with all that what are that manatee fat come around

[01:26:25] I really think that's probably how mermaids came along

[01:26:27] People in the fucking like pirates would fuck manatees and they'd be like oh yeah, dude. It was um

[01:26:33] That's something you like how you use your pussy when you fuck a human

[01:26:37] This woman just doesn't know

[01:26:40] I was looking for a horse pussy, but then I found a woman fucking a horse

[01:26:44] Can I see real quick, but she's inserting it direct like I mean this is how like a four year old

[01:26:49] Might I see the horse dick will kill might I know but you I don't even understand that yes you could see it from there

[01:26:55] No, I want to look at it closer. Oh, yeah, but that's she has to do that

[01:26:58] She's looking the size of that thing if she actually she was bent over put that in her pussy

[01:27:02] She that thing would go in you guys ever look at all you mean like this motherfucker

[01:27:06] I've watched a lot of horse fucking porn. I know that women do it the regular

[01:27:11] I'm saying this bitch is dumb and she's doing it a guy. We are mean Greg we're on

[01:27:16] Lewis's podcast. Here we go. Here we go. Let's see this guy pounds horse pussy at animal flicks.com

[01:27:24] How is that just on google? Why is that legal? It's not

[01:27:27] It's definitely I feel like google blocks that usually are you like on a special circle? No, I just typed in a horse

[01:27:35] Just on his phone

[01:27:40] I have never stumbled upon

[01:27:43] Man fucking a horse pussy ever well here's the thing I've seen plenty of horses fucking women on sure

[01:27:49] Yes, and I've seen I seen mr. Hain. I have yeah, mr

[01:27:52] Hain's I'm not proud to admit it, but I did jerk off to one of those in like when I was 14 in the kazade's

[01:27:58] We uh, oh kazau you because you would get surprised by like you had to wait you jack off to wait for like 15

[01:28:05] I'm older than you and so I used to have to wait even for a picture to load. Yeah, and so whatever

[01:28:12] Oh, wow dude. This is a guy. Oh, no

[01:28:17] No

[01:28:19] That guy looks like a guy that goes down. I think that's my uncle looks like ray comp

[01:28:24] Yeah, he really does that is ray comp. Yeah, I does a girl. I

[01:28:31] Yeah, I just this girl. I'm actually all right there

[01:28:34] Is that ray?

[01:28:36] We really hear it off there. I mean that horse. I've made a sugar cube. Yeah, we're very nice

[01:28:44] Used to just have to jerk off to whatever picture came true

[01:28:47] It was because like my mom was only gone for so long and it would take an hour and a half

[01:28:53] So it was like well, whatever. Yeah, I'm jerking off. Yeah. I used to go on to the guy

[01:28:58] I was I would download the same two video or same two pictures like every day

[01:29:04] Yeah, it was still from swordfish holly berry's tits. Oh, yeah class and then a picture of

[01:29:11] Lisa Welsh who was like miss September 1980 nice and those were the two images

[01:29:17] I beat off repeat it. I would beat off to uh in water world with kevin cost. Yeah, there's a part where they're smoking

[01:29:27] You finally see kevin costers gills no

[01:29:30] Uh

[01:29:32] No, that we're the woman offers me

[01:29:35] She offers herself to kevin costner and she drops her clothes and you just see her ass

[01:29:40] Yeah, and like this was when I was very first beating off. I would pause the vhs so much

[01:29:45] Yeah, that that part became unwatchable. I took that

[01:29:48] Stat against shit. I had a um I did that with the lives of douche

[01:29:52] I had I had like a blank vhs tape that I had recorded all of the like 2 a.m. Like call now

[01:29:57] Yeah

[01:30:00] Of like respect that one sex phone call hotline that I would just masturbate to respect

[01:30:06] That's a good you plan. I'm gonna keep it secret too. So it's just sandwich in between simpson's episode. Yeah

[01:30:13] Salute that's that's the most I've been impressed by anything you've done the sandwich brings up an interesting point my friend drew

[01:30:20] We found a porn tape of his dad's right. Yeah, and it's 45 minutes of normal like 70s his dad doing karate

[01:30:29] It's 45 minutes a normal and the five minutes of him fucking french french porn

[01:30:35] And then 45 minutes in this woman just gets fucked by a horse

[01:30:41] This is clearly the point of the video

[01:30:43] Like it's you know what i mean? It's for a guy that's it nobody's like in the both

[01:30:49] You know what I mean?

[01:30:50] It's for a guy who wants horse fucking but you put a little protection up front in case anyone finds it

[01:30:55] Saluted your dad

[01:30:57] My man was being off the girls. They're fucked by horses in the vhs. Yeah in the vhs. That must have been expensive

[01:31:03] Find the guy that was like $450 damn that's rare. Yeah, we have more stuff in this

[01:31:09] But it's very important you will never beat off all this after me

[01:31:18] Yeah, i'm looking for something for my son

[01:31:22] He's like yeah, you got a mogh right now. I have video of woman fucking

[01:31:28] We uh me and Greg run uh luis gomez's podcast one time and he goes

[01:31:33] I don't know how this came up, but he goes hi

[01:31:35] We had this friend in the neighborhood uh

[01:31:37] When I was growing up he would uh fuck a cat as a joke and me and Greg go uh, I don't think that was a joke

[01:31:44] You know when you fuck a cat

[01:31:46] Lewis grew up in the junk yard from street trash

[01:31:49] Yeah, that's generally not a

[01:31:51] It's generally not a big rubber when you fuck a cat

[01:31:55] Hey guys check out this joke. I made up. Yep. We're all gathering around watching me fuck this cat as a bit

[01:32:01] Yeah, we all lived out in the uh the same burned out Pontiac Bonneville

[01:32:07] My friend Richie would fuck a cat and that was school

[01:32:12] That was what we had instead of elementary school was my friend sodomizing

[01:32:17] feral cats

[01:32:19] And it was so funny because you couldn't tell what was mange and what was dried cub

[01:32:23] I mean, but the noises have got to be great the noises are terrible. Have you heard a cat being fucked on the street like two feral cats?

[01:32:36] Fuck yeah, it's terrifying. Yeah, I love that shit. Dude. It's it's rape. I just imagine I imagine I'm fucking rob howford as they do

[01:32:43] It's breaking the law breaking the law

[01:32:53] Fucking my ass fucking my ass there I was completely wasted drunk as shit and nude

[01:33:01] Tied up in a dirty basement making shitty boots

[01:33:05] All right, that that's gotta be the capper right how long are we done? That'll be an hour and 33 minutes. Oh, jesus christ

[01:33:16] Yeah, well Thursday boots one last time guys

[01:33:19] Please come see me in mother fucking san diego this sunday and then la on this february 2nd

[01:33:27] Um and then we got funny mom's on the 28th and then my birthday funny mom's on the 11th

[01:33:32] Whoa, right so come out to that maybe some surprises stops final birthday. It'll be my 30th

[01:33:38] His last birthday before he dies

[01:33:43] Also make it clear. He's going to die. He will be dead this year

[01:33:48] That'd be funny if we had kind of a memorial service for you. Yeah, it would be funny if we had a funeral instead of just letting his body rot

[01:33:55] On the floor of come on everybody

[01:33:57] Um also I have dates for the make-ups. I just got him during the show actually

[01:34:02] So i'm going to be doing a saturday in uh heart for two 16 same show

[01:34:08] Elbow room and then in delaware that I had to move is now february 22nd of friday

[01:34:14] So sorry I had to move those problems with the venues, but we got to figure it out now

[01:34:18] Um, but yeah, that's that's it and of course listen to the mother fucking rad dude

[01:34:23] Thank you

[01:34:25] rad dude, yeah, yeah, slash rad dude cast

[01:34:30] You guys so much of course

[01:34:32] So this was so fucking love having you thank you for talking about all the things weird shit you've done sexually

[01:34:45] We all fuck Brandon's mom

[01:34:48] She's nice. She was a nurse nice. Oh, and not she says she fuck bugs Bonnie

[01:34:53] In in the old days you had to jack guys office a nurse. Well, you know, uh, grandma was a nurse. So I know about all that

[01:35:02] Yeah, is that true about the old days? Oh, yeah, those are good times

[01:35:06] You can't move from war war two you're missing a leg. I think about that all the time dude

[01:35:11] It's like no other and that's the thing man. Nobody other than like straight white guys

[01:35:16] like it's not like

[01:35:17] And this is a burden we deal with a lot of people don't fucking realize it's like yeah

[01:35:21] We have a lot of privilege now, but we used to have so much more much go off

[01:35:25] And it's like you don't have to like hear that all the time. It's like oh, yeah

[01:35:27] You used to be able to just fuck anyone who was your employee

[01:35:31] You're drunk all the time you had $9,000 suits

[01:35:35] For some reason and then you had a 12

[01:35:37] You had a mansion because like some guys you played fucking shuffleboard with at Princeton

[01:35:45] Don't like I used to be a

[01:35:46] Extra mansion get too much pussy and you have a mansion and you just hate everybody

[01:35:52] And that's that's the way it got to be in the 15th and you have to you almost have to cheat on your wife

[01:35:57] You have to almost make you

[01:35:59] Yeah, you you

[01:36:01] Never read something happened by Joseph Heller. No, yeah, it's uh, it's great

[01:36:06] But it's just about you know just some fucking like 70s

[01:36:09] Middle-class guy that's just like and it's yeah, well, I guess I have to just fuck my wife

[01:36:14] Yeah, fucking cheat on my wife all the time. Yeah, hater. My daughter's a whore

[01:36:18] Yeah, yeah, yeah, all right folks, right. Bye