Cum Town | Regular | 12/12/2019
[00:00:00] Let's get retarded, ladies and gentlemen mr. Disney business
[00:00:18] That's a good one. I'm still I'm still doing the levels here, so you want to talk
[00:00:24] We're not recording. No towels. Tell that story you're telling early about the daycare
[00:00:28] You're having sex with the mothers and no yeah, yes, I did I said I got a job at a daycare pussy
[00:00:38] Yeah, that's right because there's nothing right yep up until now you're correct
[00:00:43] Yeah, that's the way you said the twist is that there's no twist said I'm having sex. There's no twist. Oh, we're not recording yet
[00:00:56] It's the beautiful trigger you sound weird you sound me. Yeah, doesn't he sound muffled talk at him check check
[00:01:03] How do I sound okay? Yeah, maybe let me see say something
[00:01:11] What can you keep just keep talking okay, but I all right. Yeah, I'll keep talking so I
[00:01:19] watched the social network again this weekend cuz all the hot guys in it I
[00:01:23] Didn't think it was she wanted to have sex with the two twins the wink the winkle vosses the winkle
[00:01:32] Whatever fine. That's close enough. Okay. We good. We're good. You're coming through
[00:01:36] I mean it that you don't really come through clearly it doesn't need no one cares what you have to say
[00:01:42] Some muffles that you know, they'll protect me from the legal ramifications of anything
[00:01:47] I love that I gotta figure out where's that from originally that's just that came with it that came with it
[00:01:57] That's a fucking billion dollars. All of this shit was already on the thing
[00:02:09] Presets yeah, I just I'm going through the presets. Yes a couple of fun
[00:02:13] What else they got we my bitch nigga by own damn fries that I can't believe Barack Obama's audiobook
[00:02:32] Talk about his checkered past he talks about going and by going and getting french fries
[00:02:36] He's french fries with the time he lost his temper getting french fries
[00:02:39] When my bitch nigga by own damn fries, okay, that's pretty good. You know, it's my own damn fries
[00:02:49] Yes, that's it that's good. No because he has one where he talks about packing somebody. I don't know what he called their
[00:02:57] Forgot which ones were which it's okay, man. The point is Ben Carson has a story about how he he
[00:03:03] Stabbed someone though. No, I think he said he said yo mama to somebody
[00:03:07] Mm-hmm, but I would like to listen to that
[00:03:11] So that came pre-losing what was his book called like hands of God if these hands could eat pussy
[00:03:19] I may be I may be a brain doctor, but I'm still
[00:03:28] That's we're on our third and fourth if you count implied and
[00:03:32] Well, we had a couple actual ones I spoke them by the 44th president. We're getting into the dangers
[00:03:51] I can't wait to net we don't soon. I was doing this earlier. I can't wait till we don't have to even talk
[00:03:56] Dude if this podcast a string of sound boards
[00:03:59] The money's been dropping off for a while now awesome if we get back on track if we hit a hundred thousand dollars
[00:04:04] I'm gonna full set up where I have just three different producers on passing those two and they're finding sounds cutting them up for me
[00:04:11] And then we get I just you know, and it's it's like girl talk. It's like watching a cartoon play a big word
[00:04:20] And you never know a nice collage of so you never know because it's it's ten different radio shows at once
[00:04:26] I got different bits being pulled absolutely, you know, we're playing. Yeah, we're playing a Kirkmark and Lopez
[00:04:34] Yeah, we're playing Mickey and immediately all the ever anytime anything has ever been on Baltimore
[00:04:43] That were briefly the sports junkies. You remember those guys were just a couple of guys talking about sports doing heroin
[00:04:51] They had one guy named hint or something. Yeah, there's nothing
[00:04:57] Go to the Orioles game and then I got robbed by a bunch of
[00:05:08] I just make that noise when I feel sick
[00:05:11] Oh, that was your noise. Yeah, no I made that with your fruit your mouth
[00:05:22] It just makes it that noise I didn't know that yeah, yeah, I mean, you know, it's the combination of heroin and sports
[00:05:30] He needs to get right over dose and anyway, so there was a couple of
[00:05:36] No, maybe the first time that's just a I make
[00:05:50] It really seems like you're doing you're talking right now respect your elders you got to respect it that you make
[00:06:05] Stop first of all right before you make that noise now you started
[00:06:10] Floating into an end zone before you make it no the I'm making is
[00:06:17] Look sometimes I do too much heroin and I make it
[00:06:28] No, but stop if you make I make when I'm when I'm fucked up on heroin
[00:06:38] This is a sick man, so you're saying noise for everyone. Yeah, I'm saying
[00:06:47] Well, come on man, I'm trying the systems got me down
[00:06:51] You know, it's like most of my stuff I got together, but people this is tell everybody knows
[00:06:56] I'm a heroin addict cuz I go in a store and they hear me saying and they know and they know I see
[00:07:09] And they know I can't I can't get my shit together
[00:07:13] I'm sucking some just so I can get another back
[00:07:36] Okay, all right, well, we don't have to get into it anyway. See you later sports junkie. Yeah, no
[00:07:56] Fuck you talking. Oh Carl told you that shit too. Yeah, no, he was lying
[00:08:00] Yeah, that guy was racist. Oh man. Well, I'm glad he's dead and that's the good news all races should be
[00:08:13] All races should be killed without a trial. Yeah, man. Can I cannot get some of your French fries?
[00:08:17] We might bitch nigga buy your own damn fry
[00:08:23] And the person so it's being me just cuz I'm a heroin
[00:08:28] Well, that's rude of him I'm not gonna call the president
[00:08:42] I love the new era this is high production
[00:08:58] Our dicks are hard so so did you watch the the Lakers I did game last night
[00:09:05] Did you see that clip from the jumbo Tron of lizzo's ass I did yeah, I thought it was a
[00:09:11] Masters out. I thought it was beautiful pretty nice. I
[00:09:14] Thought I think you should actually adopt that look a giant t-shirt with a whole with a whole cutout just for my
[00:09:20] That was a great look. I thought it was fake at first
[00:09:22] I didn't know that it was lizzo until I found out today on Twitter. Well, she said she wanted to fuck Carl Anthony
[00:09:28] Town's oh cuz she's a she's from Minneapolis. Yeah, she's from Minneapolis. She's from Minneapolis
[00:09:33] You probably didn't hear that we'll catch that one. I did I dropped his levels in buzzed him right when he said she's a
[00:09:50] Implicating stop implying well, yeah, I was wondering what was going on here cuz Nick the mic was down. He was just
[00:10:04] Thought we were on the sports junkies we got to know the sport junkies are dead. All right
[00:10:10] There was that wasn't dead from racism and not from drugs. Yeah, let me see so
[00:10:17] Wait try to talk again hello wait, I'm still hear me in the head in the camp you can hear it
[00:10:26] Yeah, you're a channel you're two stops three. I'm three
[00:10:32] Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, that's all right guys in a couple weeks. We're gonna know all the channel
[00:10:36] No, we won't we'll just I didn't sound quite right, but I would have fucking I would have gotten
[00:10:40] Well the good news is you could just do it and post it anytime I could you
[00:10:56] It's all Oh the beat party is to yeah, yeah, I'm gonna turn it I'm gonna I'm gonna you be like dial this
[00:11:19] I mean I was making fun. I was trying to stop saying it implied, but you're just dropping
[00:11:26] I was gonna say mix master but I'm mixed
[00:11:38] I haven't seen Nick Smol this much in six months
[00:11:50] The way this podcast is enabled me to get to the final levels of autism which is spending
[00:11:56] Seven hours of the day doing duo lingo Chinese and then fucking around with it and then making other people relearning it
[00:12:03] Trying to pick it back up. Mm-hmm. Cuz I I don't want to if I go on a trip to China
[00:12:08] I want to at least be able to I don't want to repeat of Japan
[00:12:12] Hmm where I just assumed that I'm like of course they learn English a lot of them do no
[00:12:19] It was difficult it was hard, but here's the thing the phones
[00:12:21] I you I broke like two of those fucking coffee machines and
[00:12:28] Cuz I didn't know you're actually you're right. They did they did speak way less English. Yeah, I got frustrated
[00:12:34] But that's a sign that's how you show them you go in there. You're like listen up. You fucking I got a
[00:12:44] Where do I get heroin in Japan? I'm looking for some heroin. Do they have
[00:12:55] What all right, it's one thing if Nick does it but Adam I really need you to stop man because it's not clear if you're being ironic
[00:13:06] You know I didn't say I wish I got the first time was perfect timing
[00:13:10] But I did you and said yeah cuz he's sitting over there. So my hand thinking that's three. Yeah, but this is too. Yeah
[00:13:17] Yeah, it goes better right. Oh, that's why your shit's what that's why your shit's muffled. Oh
[00:13:25] Keep talking hello. Yeah, there we go. That sounds better, right? Yeah, I think that sounds better
[00:13:33] Hey listen real quick before I know we usually plug later
[00:13:36] But if you're in Houston this weekend come see me man H sound H town. I'm gonna be at the secret group
[00:13:41] I'll save the rest of the plugs for later, but this one's time sensitive. You're getting plugs, too
[00:13:46] I'm getting your hair plugs. Yeah, beautiful. Are you eligible for the surgery? I think so
[00:13:51] I think what's the eligibility wait though?
[00:13:53] Cuz you I feel like there's gonna be sooner rather than later a way to just like spray your shit with stem cells
[00:13:59] That'll be awesome. I am waiting. Let's be honest
[00:14:02] I think have you seen that have you seen that they've got like it's basically like a paint sprayer
[00:14:06] But they put like skin cells. Yes in a spray gun for burn victims
[00:14:11] Mm-hmm, and you know damn if they do that with beautiful curly hair. Yeah, I want curls when I get hair
[00:14:19] Again, like me no more beautiful than yours like a like a young mare donna. Oh
[00:14:28] Kind of Greek exactly yeah, you get like those leaves although Shirley Temple's not a bad look either. Yeah tight red curls big lolly
[00:14:36] Sailor see I would rot shirt shirt or no not Shirley Temple fucking
[00:14:41] Shirley temple no what is that the little little the little god damn that was a good one yeah
[00:15:11] Now we're cooking again. Oh, yeah, I guess oh they named the drink after her. Yeah. Yes
[00:15:20] Yes, I thought I had another Freudian slip where I forgot a real person's name and switched it for like a food or something
[00:15:27] It's both a food. I used to fucking love a damn Shirley Temple. What is it sprite and cherry shit? Yeah
[00:15:33] Maraschino cherry juice and shit like that. Yeah, that was
[00:15:36] It was a call whenever you went to a place with like fantastic and they had like a like a baptism or wedding
[00:15:42] Yeah, like a bath. I remember there was apartments for where they had a bar. Oh, yeah
[00:15:46] They had they had I was like it was Nick's bar mitzvah. Yeah
[00:16:00] I make a brilliant comedy writer character. I do it's an all right guy
[00:16:06] I figured there was a market for it. They can make some money to spend on boys
[00:16:14] Bar mitzvah theme was the Academy Award
[00:16:16] No, the theme was Shirley Temple. Yeah, so I'm Shirley Temple and all of my guests are mr. Bojangles
[00:16:26] Complimenting me and teaching me how to dance
[00:16:31] That's a nice bar mitzvah, man. Yeah sure virgin Shirley temples my friend had the best. Well, they don't they are they're all virgin
[00:16:37] I know there's no I didn't know that no. Yeah, Nick used to put I would pass in there. Yeah, very virgin Shirley
[00:16:45] Not like we're not like version Dax is a virgin Dax is a virgin Dax absolutely
[00:16:52] David Buster's also had version dude a dad one that they let you when they let you get a daiquiri. Yeah
[00:16:59] And I'm just having three and they're like, okay. I'm a business name
[00:17:04] I'm a I'm a small business man. I know you look at my width
[00:17:08] You say who's the circular boy? What's he doing? Yeah, dude? I used to have to shit so bad after
[00:17:16] Baptism or wedding the shit I would put into my body
[00:17:18] I would literally pray to God because my stomach ache was so bad honestly what I did to myself looking back at my life my
[00:17:25] My greatest regret is not staying fat as shit forever. Yeah, cuz it's like come back, but it destroys you come back
[00:17:34] But then it's like if you write exactly who cares, but you don't know what it's like to not be fat anymore
[00:17:43] There's a light at the end of the time brother. Here's the thing you stay here and you make your little neighborhood
[00:17:48] That's what I'm saying. That's that's I didn't do that. Yeah, I'm a man without a country. You are you really are
[00:17:54] Cuz you can't you'll never really be part of it. I'm part of the diaspora
[00:18:00] I'm sorry that it cut out for a second. I think you said the fat diaspora. I did
[00:18:05] You have to censor because because of lizzo because you'll lose. Oh no because you're not allowed to say that anymore
[00:18:11] No, I'll tell you something she's gonna die from
[00:18:29] I'm sorry for my friends from my friends behavior. I would love to make a plus-size child with you
[00:18:45] Gerber should make this ever fat baby line and it's just like a little cup of barbecue sauce
[00:18:51] Honey dripping yeah dripping from bacon. I'm thinking fried sweet and sour sauce from McDonald's in my head
[00:18:58] Oh, yeah, but I've been having a bad. I used to love that shit
[00:19:02] Mm-hmm, but honestly as an adult as a man
[00:19:06] It doesn't I don't have the same appreciation for it. I like Polynesian sauce from Chick-fil-A
[00:19:11] Yeah, Chick-fil-A's got the sauce game on lock. Yeah Chick-fil-A sauce. Wonderful fantastic Polynesian sauce with a little mayonnaise
[00:19:18] To cream it up. Yeah, that's right. It's not easy isn't creamy enough. It's too clear
[00:19:25] It is it's a real problem. You need a more coming first of all Chick-fil-A sauce is the exact right consistency for a dipping
[00:19:31] So it is true and what's it? What's the difference?
[00:19:34] Little mayonnaise that's the nice thing about Chick-fil-A is you take the sandwich you dip the whole sandwich into the container
[00:19:40] Incredible multiple sauces brother when they open the Chick-fil-A on campus at the University of Maryland both more county
[00:19:46] Mm-hmm. That was a I had this the Jew I hit I got the junior 15
[00:19:50] They had a Chick-fil-A on campus at the George Washington University and payment was very optional. Yeah. Oh, yeah
[00:19:57] Yeah, there was some broke days where I would just go
[00:20:01] Have like a man for money three sandwiches would buy you a sandwich. Well, I just remember the sandwich
[00:20:10] I had a friend of a friend who was like a rent boy like a boy for high-powered DC homosexuals
[00:20:18] Oh, he was you could just get his ass ran through by like a call boy
[00:20:22] He was a call boy and he was like he what he did it
[00:20:26] It's like what a rich woman does it like for the thrill. He was kind of like that who's in it for the yeah
[00:20:31] Yeah, I bet you I bet you they make it underwear for guns like that
[00:20:34] I think they do what kind of wonder what it is, you know, my problem is when I go to buy underwear
[00:20:39] It's not designed to get fucked in your ass. So this store you go in a store and you're like
[00:20:46] Fuck this store. I hate stores. There's damn store. It's like what?
[00:20:50] Did a no, can you hand me French fries?
[00:20:55] My bitch nigga by own damn price. We're gonna damn under what that's what you think when you're buying
[00:21:01] underwear to store. Yeah, I say I want Obama to buy
[00:21:04] My underwear and he says in my bitch nigga buy owned underwear
[00:21:13] Panic because the president has said a slur to you horrible worthy you would never think we're saying if you said it to me
[00:21:27] I go to Mac Weldon calm that's so much better. You could do it online Mac. Well, no, it's not there's no guy named Mac Weldon
[00:21:34] It's just we just fucked up to be fair. Well every clothing company now for guys like us. Yeah, they're all their names are like
[00:21:46] You know I love Tim Horton's important maple scented boxer coffee and jeans
[00:21:52] Timi hormones Tim hormones. That's right
[00:21:54] Yeah, we sell we sell a little donuts donuts donuts and then
[00:22:12] Mac well in the Tim Horton era they're merging there
[00:22:17] Family products it's guys stuff, you know, it's underwear and then
[00:22:41] Egg drops in the underwear go to Macwell
[00:22:44] Not where you put your balls and you will leave two egg drops you get a spinach egg white omelet
[00:22:50] Medallion in the nut sack. Yeah, which they have a special little sack for your nuts
[00:22:57] There look Macwell calm their mission is simple to make sure all your basics and beyond are smartly designed
[00:23:04] And shopping for the miseasian convenient. I've never heard a less convoluted sentence in my life. I mean you're basic
[00:23:10] I hate how hard it is to what are basics like underpants under shirts?
[00:23:14] Yeah, see Macwell calm our mission is simple to make sure all your and beyond are smartly designed and shopping is easy and
[00:23:28] Adam just ran up at him shitting himself
[00:23:32] Anyways, actually, you know what I had to give a pair of Macwell underwear to Ian the other day
[00:23:37] Mmm, and he loved them and it was because he came over to my apartment to hang out and shit himself on
[00:23:47] And then had the audacity to come out of the bathroom and pretend he didn't well
[00:23:51] No, not pretend that he didn't he tried to throw his underwear away in my kitchen
[00:23:56] Oh shit. Yeah with shit all over with shit
[00:24:00] Your kitchen is smelling like a man shit. That was his plan was to throw it away in there
[00:24:06] I was like no you got to put those outside
[00:24:10] Yeah, but then have the audacity to be like you should be getting out more man
[00:24:15] It's like no you should be learning the basic stuff you need to learn before you go out
[00:24:20] Like not shit ain't don't shit yourself on the way B
[00:24:24] Don't try and keep the soiled shit underwear in a common area in the home
[00:24:28] So we had to set him up with the pair of Macwell
[00:24:31] And he loves them because Macwellness about the basics basics like not shitting yourself
[00:24:36] That's right the best pair on the where to get if you've just graduated from diapers at age 34
[00:24:41] That's right and more of your asshole has been ravaged so much right to your friend's house
[00:24:48] If you're fast and loose from playing it fast and loose you'll love Macwell and underwear
[00:24:54] That's right. Do you have a big asshole get Macwell get Mac their frustration was real and their ureca moment happened in a department store
[00:25:03] I'll full of brands that dominated our top drawer
[00:25:06] Surrounded by a mind-numbing assortment of underwear and socks we realized consistent fit and quality became a game
[00:25:16] But no, they are there there are very there nights look I don't know if if we've got a lot of
[00:25:22] Younger men that listen to this yes that are mad because they want to TFW no pussy for for Mark
[00:25:31] TFW that damn a lot TFW no pussy for founding for gamer mark
[00:25:37] And it's like guys here that are like their basic setup you're a five out of ten
[00:25:42] You don't understand why you're not why you can't fuck or whatever and it's like well
[00:25:47] You know you may look to us, but you forget that we're famous
[00:25:51] We're famous. We're funnier than you we're more interesting all that kind of stuff
[00:25:55] I mean that might not even be true, but it's like you know you got it. There's other shit that you got
[00:26:00] I mean for the most part it is there might be I wish someone had pulled me aside when I was 22 and been like you can't
[00:26:07] Keep wearing underwear you've had since high school. Yeah. Yeah with holes. Yeah, whole just torn to pieces. Yeah
[00:26:14] Yeah, I'm like what the fuck is underwear. I still got a couple of holes
[00:26:17] You wearing sweatpants with ducks all over them and a shirt you found in a church not get pussy
[00:26:24] I know for your shirt that you found that a church you're wearing blue M&M put a jam of pants, right?
[00:26:29] Yeah, that's not a problem. That's pretty cool. Yeah
[00:26:32] Blue lives matter so there's all these guys now the younger guys that know how to dress themselves
[00:26:37] That's right, and you just got to emulate them. Mm-hmm when that doesn't work then you can go shoot up sandhose
[00:26:48] But listen you will get here's the thing guaranteed you will get pussy if you buy clothes from Macwell
[00:26:54] Guaranteed you will get or your buddy back or your pussy or your pussy or Adam or you a pussy by the underwear or your
[00:27:04] Yes, here's how it works if you're not a pussy you will get pussy if you buy these underwear
[00:27:09] Well, I'll tell you what our pussy you won't get pussy. Well, you're ready a pussy. So you already got pussy
[00:27:14] They feel good. You know they feel good because you have yourself the design now smart. It doesn't work the fabrics are premium
[00:27:23] Yeah, stop trying to do your Seinfeld comedy
[00:27:27] I'm not doing Seinfeld comedy. I don't know. I thought you know, I'm not good at observational comedy
[00:27:31] Yeah, that's a good all the shit on Seinfeld that made Seinfeld bad
[00:27:35] Was like was Jerry Seinfeld's input. Yeah him doing his act on the coffee shop. Everybody loves saying salsa
[00:27:43] What the fuck are you talking? What is it? What is it?
[00:27:50] And just all the writers who are like the best comedy writers in the world being like, okay, Jerry
[00:27:55] We can put this also thing goes in sure. Yeah, great
[00:27:59] No, really good stuff dude. Yeah, shouldn't you go? Can you go hang out with a commie seller and lecture people?
[00:28:10] Shouldn't you be driving around in your Ferrari lecturing people?
[00:28:17] Like I just fucking tell people what the fuck to do. Yeah, he raped the child
[00:28:25] I guess he didn't I guess is not illegal, but yeah
[00:28:31] Dude, I'm like 20 years ago when that shit was like nobody gave a shit. Yeah, you go you go get yourself
[00:28:46] Well, and Mac over and everyone thinks you know, he's like everyone's gonna think I'm cool
[00:28:52] And then 20 years later, they're like remember when he thought he was cool
[00:29:12] I mean it makes sense. I'm gonna pretend like I know that and then I wasn't just waking up that he pretended he had down syndrome. No, it makes
[00:29:25] His act is a guy on the spectrum back well
[00:29:30] Mac well will be the most comfortable underwear
[00:29:35] Under shirts hoodies and sweatpants and more that you'll ever wear they have a line of silver underwear and shirts that are naturally
[00:29:41] Antimicrobial Adam. What does that mean? I?
[00:29:47] Yeah, come on the good people man. I don't like to look at what I'm doing
[00:29:56] It's against the rules for you to pre-em to me
[00:30:01] Maybe I should do it blindfold that would be fun. Yeah, yeah, no cell phone. That would be good
[00:30:06] That way too. You can't tell the difference between people right? I'm not gonna
[00:30:17] So anyway, what's the promo code the promo code come town is
[00:30:25] Tango Sylvester's a great name. It really is. I'm gonna name my son. So no, no, you're not
[00:30:31] Yeah, Sylvester for 20% off your first order visit macwell.com and enter promo code come town that's CUM T. Oh
[00:30:52] Come town come down 20 you mother fuckers enter promo code come town 20 at macwell.com 20% off your first order
[00:30:58] If you do not like the underwear you can return them no questions asked no questions asked
[00:31:04] And well you don't return them you just get a review and then you keep the underwear
[00:31:08] So if you pull a little Ian in your pants, yes watch free underwear free underwear
[00:31:13] Well, I mean you still got to throw them out in your friend's kitchen
[00:31:16] So it's technically you don't get anything really but you don't have to pay for the underwear that you shouldn't oh shit
[00:31:21] Oh shit in my pants. I took a dump in my pants arena
[00:31:29] Yeah, where is a movie called instead of crank it's shitted
[00:31:33] You don't understand I'm gonna keep shitting he's got a constantly be
[00:31:47] By cheeky cello gave me a pause and cheeky poison a cheeky poison a mace my my booty cheeks open up just a little bit
[00:32:01] I'm gonna do I have shit too much so couldn't he just get something in his ass if it's about how his cheeks clamp up
[00:32:10] That's smart you need to see what so wait cranky has to keep his heart beat over yeah, you mean to tell me that this guy's got shit in his ass
[00:32:24] Yeah, I'm out here and beautiful Vancouver and I got a dick in my ass
[00:32:31] Vancouver's a great city. It's one of my favorite cities. I love coming here and
[00:32:35] I'm gonna pick fat dick right up my Dwayne the rock Johnson you having gay sex in vain Dwayne the Johnson here
[00:32:45] For WrestleMania 27 this is a great event. We've we're raising money for kids who are also
[00:33:16] Sound boys great. That's really good. It really takes it up to 11. Oh, yeah
[00:33:21] Yeah, we have an apparti out here, baby. We have a
[00:33:31] See you see both continue. No, I got nothing I'm starting to feel weird all of a sudden
[00:33:35] Yeah, I just found out I've die re-iduring the Mac Weldon really so if I get sick from you man
[00:33:47] That's probably good hang. Hey, it's Dwayne Johnson here. I'm on frantic at the stand tonight
[00:34:00] Yep, can you smell my ass while it's getting forward? We get this straight yet
[00:34:15] Oh, yeah, if there's one thing I want sure
[00:34:41] Atomeger is it like a cockney slang? Yeah
[00:35:08] Nothing like a beep beep beep beep is the bad
[00:35:12] I'm really taking what you're doing episode. I feel bad for fucking kids growing up today without beep beep beep
[00:35:19] Do that in class. Yeah teacher being mad at you. What the funniest shit in the world
[00:35:23] I used to love watching Jerry Springer. Oh, yeah, and they would have an episode of Jerry Springer would be like
[00:35:28] We she's in third grade and she's having sex with black men twice a rage
[00:35:34] Let's bring around Delilah, and then it's a little girl in the audience. It's like
[00:35:43] Yeah, I don't care 90s Jerry. I'm gonna do what I want
[00:35:47] I'm gonna do what I want Jerry if I want to I can do it if I want to
[00:35:56] Great boo. Yeah, my question is for the little shorty if you are hot if you if you don't know your ABCs
[00:36:10] Yeah, the audience like tries to fight the guests. Yeah, I love it right Jerry's on a new show
[00:36:14] I didn't know this I was home at if you in grade three. Why do you got HIV?
[00:36:22] They would go to the audience to do this
[00:36:27] Jenny Jones you need Jenny Craig. Yeah, that was a big one. Yeah, yeah
[00:36:32] So Jerry's on a new show called judge Jerry judge
[00:36:36] He's I didn't know he even had a law degree, but he's like taking now. He's like then it's the new judge show on TV
[00:36:42] I think you mean Jerry's sign though. No, it's just wait. Was he is he a judge?
[00:36:46] Yeah, I know he was mayor of Cincinnati. I know he's a mayor. I think he's a lot of defendant
[00:36:51] That makes sense plaintiff. What the hell is that should be called a kuzah?
[00:36:56] That's good. Yeah. Yeah, you ever notice how there's a plaintiff
[00:37:03] Mark yeah, oh mark. Yeah, Joe's a Joe's mobile
[00:37:07] Basie, it's true. Yeah, I finally got sued for something
[00:37:10] But you know you're supposed to be able to meet your accuser
[00:37:15] That's like a big part of the you should be confronted just a system. I guess but they're telling me if it's a five year old
[00:37:35] Mark the pedophile you're so close to the floor. Yeah, the other thing they get all these pedophiles now and they're in schools trying to
[00:37:44] Yeah, a big thing now is trans people they want to make it legal to
[00:37:52] And trans people really have it the best don't they
[00:37:56] Damn can we add that one to the board those pretty good what the fart you guys heard it is in your headphones. I guess
[00:38:01] Yeah, you know how the best in this world is trans black guys
[00:38:09] You're good to be a girl so everybody wants to have sex with you, but you're also six foot five
[00:38:16] I can't say that I walked into a subway and I was like give me a sandwich
[00:38:23] They got more mad at me than they did the pedophile used to work there
[00:38:29] Was a wedding wedding subway Jared just say it was trans. I
[00:38:44] So do you see our friend our friend friend of the show Hillary Clinton was on the Howard's dude Howard looked horrible
[00:38:52] Dude, what the fuck do you hear us sucks?
[00:38:54] To see your heroes be complacent in that I mean he's just a rich guy
[00:38:59] I'm what you don't you think Bernie's I can't do Howard Stern at all. No, it's it's deep and it's like New York
[00:39:05] It's not I have no idea. It's super low. I have no idea. We're even
[00:39:12] I can't do it. You can't do any I can do a couple of
[00:39:38] I can go outside and take it in hell or is been going to go outside. I'm gonna take a big that sounds great Howard
[00:39:49] Yeah, I can't do it dude. No, we're crushing it. Yeah, we got
[00:40:00] Oh Bernie fucking stay around Bernie run my chances
[00:40:08] Cuz she was like right he sucks. Yeah, cuz he he sent me a letter saying he was gonna rape me in
[00:40:15] June of oh my god 2016 Wow the only reason I ran is to get black women out of jail
[00:40:21] That's so great and a lot of people he stole all my ideas
[00:40:25] Can I see your personal this these were all ideas at me and Liz Warren
[00:40:30] I know you can't trust Jews. Yeah, you really can except for my good friend Jeffrey Epstein
[00:40:37] Who killed himself? He was a misunderstood guy
[00:40:41] Yeah, me and your husband Bill had a great time on those airplanes Harvey Weinstein too
[00:40:47] He Epstein and Weinstein though this thing while Luigi and why rape
[00:40:58] It thanks for listening to the Howard Stern show come back and we're gonna get Hillary to ride the Sibian
[00:41:34] Because your net is not one I did a pretty good drink because you had a terrible Peter Griffin last time you tried to do it
[00:41:41] No, it was hilarious. Yes, it was so pink and walrus. Yeah. Yeah, it was really bad
[00:41:47] So it's good to see that you did I'm just out here free. You're so humiliated. You went back into the workshop with that
[00:41:53] Well, I was not humiliating. I'm never human you watch YouTube is what I did was I felt see it's kind of like in basketball
[00:41:59] When you're when you're on a hot streak for example, I just nailed Howard Stern so much
[00:42:02] Mm-hmm that my confidence allowed me to nail Peter Griffin. Yeah, it's true. I'm how it's turned and I'm gay
[00:42:10] That sounds good change law. Yeah, I don't even know what Peter I can't do Peter's alright man
[00:42:17] Why everybody's gifted with the instrument like I would just have to listen to me
[00:42:21] It's an easy voice to do Howard. It's really no Peter. Yeah. Yeah, it's Rhode Island
[00:42:26] Yeah, I'll be in Rhode Island who plays the neighbor. It's putty, right? Yeah, I think it is. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah
[00:42:34] Wow, of course it is. Yeah, let's put that together. Yeah, it's me. Shout out to putty getting it's hacks after good
[00:42:39] Here I am the neighbor. Oh, someone said to me after one of our they said that you're a faggot. No, well
[00:42:46] At the end I heard that too. No, stop it. I also heard that. How are you sir? We're going live to the guy
[00:42:52] And he said that you're a that was going live to the guy. Yeah
[00:43:02] I've got him on another okay away. Let's patch him through a lane. It's me family
[00:43:17] Over your center. Oh, right that he's a well you heard it from him Elaine
[00:43:26] Wayne from Seinfeld was the guy. Yeah, she's my girlfriend on another show
[00:43:32] Well, thank you so much putty family guy. Yeah, this is the Howard Stern show. Yeah
[00:43:37] Come back. We're all gonna have sex with Robin
[00:43:39] Oh my god, how would you crazy for this one?
[00:43:50] Well if you need to replace your wallet
[00:43:53] Yeah, my dad's suggestion Reno a little website called Ridge
[00:43:58] Oh, you might might write which we've said before I've been told by the Ridge wallet company that the ridges does not stand for the penis
[00:44:05] Really, yeah, they actually sent that note over you know
[00:44:09] They might someone might have hacked their email because it seems ridiculous that it wouldn't stand for penis
[00:44:17] In fact if anyone just because I assume their website was hacked to say that it doesn't stand for that if we have any hackers
[00:44:24] Out there that might want to hack into their website. Yeah, hack it back hack it back
[00:44:28] Back to the point where it says it stands for penis
[00:44:33] Resident Ridge wallet we're asking is for some freelance hacker to hack the company paying us money and say that their product
[00:44:41] Means penis. Yeah, so it means the penis tip
[00:44:46] The tip the tip the tip of the ridgerino the tip of the penis
[00:44:50] The tip of the penis. That's what the Marines are the tip of the cock
[00:44:53] I'm gonna little tip touch on my peenhole if the Marines are the tip of the spear the tip of the spear is the army the shaft of the cock
[00:44:59] It is and the balls is one of the Navy and one ball is the air force the merchant Marines
[00:45:06] Air Force is the asshole so rich the edge wallet is a brand new type. This is this is a blade runner shit
[00:45:12] Oh my god. I love that. I use the Ridge wallet myself
[00:45:15] Mm-hmm and here's some language about Ridge to inspire you. I love language
[00:45:19] If you guys are at home trying to figure out your own ad reads for Ridge to tell your friends
[00:45:23] Because let me tell you nothing makes friends other than like walking up to a group of strangers and just going into about a product
[00:45:30] You enjoy yeah, you go up to the bus stop and you go. What's up?
[00:45:34] So you guys I guess that's probably that's it. That's when it stopped being funny
[00:45:43] Well, he could have said anything folks. Yeah
[00:45:46] That's the beauty of the beep. Yeah, you don't technically have them
[00:45:51] All right, so I had a big piece of shit wallet this company comes mosey and down the ball
[00:46:01] Smelling great. I just said too much shit in my wallet
[00:46:05] Like literal shit Adam. What are you doing?
[00:46:10] Nothing what kind of wallet do you have I have a Ridge wallet? He has a purse. He's got a purse
[00:46:15] Well inside my purse. I've a Ridge wallet. He's got a plane
[00:46:21] Elaine can we get you on the line here on the Howard's dirt show? Yeah, I'm talking to Elaine right now great
[00:46:27] Let's hear from her. What kind of wallet does Adam have? Yeah, she says he's got a purse
[00:46:31] And does he keep it in his own pussy keeps it in his ass. I got a little thank you for clarifying
[00:46:36] I got a pussy in the well, we've got both
[00:46:45] Do you have a pussy and an ass Howard leave that boy alone shut the fuck up
[00:46:53] What did you just call me Howard I didn't say anything you dumb. Oh
[00:47:01] Please please end it with a soft day Howard. Please just let it in with a soft day
[00:47:22] 12 years I had to listen to that we're on satellite radio. I didn't say the N word. Yeah, so 12 the 12 years of slave
[00:47:29] That's it's my my full fast and just saying that for 12 years
[00:47:34] The end it's a soft day and he gives a guy a high five and he's like all right go back to New York
[00:47:45] I use the Ridge wallet with the carbon fiber. Oh nice, but yeah
[00:47:49] It's basically just two pieces of fucking metal aluminum or titanium or carbon fiber or whatever
[00:47:54] Yeah, hold together with elastic. Yeah, and then it's it holds all your credit card size. So holds all your fucking cards
[00:48:00] I love that fucking money clip on the back hell. Yeah, and yeah, anybody tries to rob you
[00:48:05] You're not fun with a wallet. You can get to your everyday carrier Glock
[00:48:11] Fully automatic so some guys like hey, man. You got you have 25 cents a cup
[00:48:18] I was afraid for the lives of me and my fellow officers
[00:48:21] In the police like okay, well, you're not a cop. It will accept that anyway
[00:48:25] Thank you. That's acceptable testimony in the United States of America
[00:48:42] Yeah, you care a lot of point man care a lot of point of stuff in the wallets receipts hotel room key you spent gift cards
[00:48:51] Resemble some cases more than wallet you fuck condoms dude
[00:48:55] Tell me carry the con look look if we weren't talking about gender shit. I'll be real with you. Yeah be real
[00:49:00] Dude, it's a bitches job to bring condoms
[00:49:09] Back in the day. It's like women didn't want to seem like horse. So they didn't carry condoms around. It's like we know you're all horse
[00:49:15] Yeah, 100% at this point this point this is getting writer and
[00:49:25] We're not pretending like this is the first time you decided to fuck somebody in the security hallway
[00:49:34] Like sometimes they have to pay you $15 first, but you think that this you think that's brave
[00:49:42] Yes, this is not only is it brave, but now it's the same thing as reading Karl Marx
[00:49:46] Yes, it is socialism is to go out get on cam and and fuck yourself in the ass
[00:49:52] That sounds pretty chill. Yeah, it's cool. I'll look at a video of that. Yeah, anyways
[00:50:08] There's no space for condoms. It's the bitches job
[00:50:12] I got a bumper sticker on my my wallet that says no space for condoms. That's the bitches
[00:50:19] It's a bitches job a feminist so I carry around a female
[00:50:24] Put it in your ass and you put in your ass and they piss in it. Yeah
[00:50:30] Yeah, but it's with a girl. Yeah, it's not gay. It's not good
[00:50:33] It'd be funny to not like not bring condoms or whatever like to a random hook up. Yeah, and then you're like
[00:50:38] I don't like she's like I don't know any kind of like I don't either. I guess I could just take a shoot in your
[00:50:45] Excuse me. I'm like I guess that's the next
[00:50:49] That's his slick way of like I mean we can give each other head. Yeah
[00:50:54] I don't really like that. I mean I feel cuz like you know, there's also viruses on you get stuff from head
[00:51:00] I might get like I might get like you know, chlamydia in my mouth
[00:51:05] In your pussy and I'll jack off. I'm just gonna jet beat off while shit
[00:51:13] But I'll get an infection yeah, but that's not a virus you fucking you fucking dumb bitch
[00:51:21] Oh wait, I found condoms. It's like fine. I guess I'll take a shit in the condom
[00:51:35] So you want me to press my asshole up against the plastic condom and warm pussy. Yeah, you fucking bitch. I hate fucking
[00:52:00] Yeah, I'm using the Ridge wallet with the carbon fiber shit
[00:52:03] I got they gave me too many and a lot of people have asked me if I can give them one free nope guess who just
[00:52:17] Because I've already bought everyone Apple TV and I have no idea what other you did kindles like to help
[00:52:24] Kindles this is yeah, yeah, that was three years ago. Yeah, was that three everyone's got Apple TV
[00:52:29] Everybody's got kindles and it's like time for a ritual at this point. It's like
[00:52:34] What the fuck are you getting people cash?
[00:52:38] My dad my mom I can go I might go he's got my mom like earrings or some you can get her a soda stream supporting good cause
[00:52:45] What are you talking about your mom your mom would like that?
[00:52:48] I know how your mom feels about the place where some
[00:52:53] Yeah, get her so shims get her the DVD box set of power Rangers. Yeah get her Schindler's list
[00:52:59] She has the hey, my mom's just watching Schindler's list in reverse. Yeah, just rewinding it and smiling
[00:53:05] She loves the beginning. Yeah, she loves the early parts. Yeah, we're they dismantle the factory and all those people go back into the pot
[00:53:14] Go back to the get toe the Ridge is a minimal front pocket wall
[00:53:17] This is designed to streamline what you carry every day
[00:53:20] It has 30,000 five star reviews and is better to carry your cash and cards at this point. It's got to be 40,000 stars
[00:53:26] Oh, yeah, it is I just checked 47,000 they got a nice bump folks listen to this
[00:53:31] It's got 30,000 star reviews. That's almost a hundred thousand star
[00:53:37] The wallet companies that calling me up and they say I've got the juiciest guy I've ever seen
[00:53:43] They had to make a new wallet. There's women and they have an abortions
[00:53:49] Out of their pussies. Mm-hmm. There's women and they they're putting babies inside of the pussies
[00:53:55] And we got to stop it. It's got to be stopped. It's disgusting
[00:53:59] There's a lifetime warranty if you love it in free returns if you don't comes in titanium carbon fiber aluminum and over adopted
[00:54:04] Dobby-Dobby and dipping dials in college. Okay get 10% on today
[00:54:09] Really good read nice we they're gonna love this
[00:54:16] We're hitting them with a lot this one well, I guess they said it's not the dick
[00:54:20] It's I don't think they look like I do like a lot of people think the reads are designed because they're hard to skip
[00:54:26] But the truth is they're hard for the clients to listen
[00:54:31] They just trust using the code so that's how you know the code
[00:54:35] Yeah, you know the promo code the promo code so go online
[00:54:39] Requested an engraved wallet with whatever your favorite word is
[00:54:45] At Ridge dot com slash comtown use code comtown to get 10% off with free worldwide shipping and returns
[00:54:52] All right, they got other shit on there, too. They got a nice backpack. We found out last time cell phone. Yeah cell phone cases. Oh
[00:55:03] Way my bitch nigga, I don't damn frice Obama
[00:55:08] Come on, dude. Don't you have to go hang gliding with fucking
[00:55:13] You fucking piece of shit. Hey, this is doing the rock Johnson. I'm here live on Jeffrey Epstein's Island
[00:55:19] Stop did you see Trump's address to that Jewish organization?
[00:55:25] Yeah, I did absolutely rock. It's good. Yeah, and he's crushing in the room too
[00:55:30] That's like this is so anti-Semitic, but he's like you guys are brutal violent
[00:55:36] News corner. What is he really say that he says to be fair to fully contextualize a clip at the very beginning
[00:55:43] He says a lot of you are real estate guys. I know you I've worked with you. That's awesome. He's like
[00:55:48] I don't like you you don't like your killers. You're you know, you're cold-blooded killers and
[00:55:53] Like people leave off the real estate thing. No, it's in the clip
[00:55:56] Yeah, it's in the clip, but I mean, it's like you're he's talking about other people
[00:55:59] He means he knows the real estate. He's also he's also addressing like a right-wing pro-Israel group, too
[00:56:05] So it's not like yeah, it's a love it. They love getting saying they're killers
[00:56:10] Yeah, and then it's like I don't know that clip of Joe Biden last week where he just addresses that guy is fat
[00:56:15] Listen fat and then listen fat get your words straight Jack and then each other challenge him to push up
[00:56:22] I don't know if you push up to run anything you want just squaring off with them
[00:56:26] Like it's about to be the Thunderbirds versus you know the 21st Street's incredible deal. Yeah, yeah
[00:56:51] What you think I'm gonna be my biggest supporters because you'll be out of business in about 15 minutes if they get it
[00:56:56] Some of you I don't like it at all. He's funny that was awesome
[00:57:02] It's so funny that he is more put together than Joe Biden. Yeah, the Democrats are trying to get your words straight Jack
[00:57:10] Purely I'll do a push-up contest right now. This motherfucker's brain is tapioca pudding dude
[00:57:14] That she's gonna start coming out of his family. Maybe if you weren't watching the damn news
[00:57:18] I want to see I'm not sudden Terry. I want to see honestly at this point like
[00:57:22] You know, I won't Bernie obviously, but if it's not him. I won't buy it indeed
[00:57:26] Those would be the best about Blurdney Sanders. I would much rather have Biden than fucking Buttigieg
[00:57:34] Does it Biden versus Trump in a debate? I guess you're right. I guess you're right that would at least be funny
[00:57:44] Hard I'll vote but I mean it's just it's it's hard to ignore it hasn't stopped since 2016
[00:57:51] But there's been no yeah, well, it's never gonna stop. That's how it works now
[00:57:56] It's just a constant election. It's just it's just trash. I mean it'll stop or I mean, I don't know who knows
[00:58:05] It's kind of funny the funniest outcome is is Mayor Pete beats Trump easily that
[00:58:11] Walks everything back and then none of the note not a single socialist policy matters
[00:58:16] He doesn't have to walk anything back. I know but I mean it's like
[00:58:19] He no, I mean he was initially like more friendly to he was he used to be a medic for a guy
[00:58:26] He was very early on and then he like mince's words with regards to it. I mean, it's it's like he's just so purely a fucking policy
[00:58:34] Like it's so awesome. No, that would be the funniest outcomes it honestly gets a nomination easily beats Trump and
[00:58:42] And then and then quietly people at large stopped caring about socialist stuff and then it just sort of gets relegated back to being
[00:58:54] Yeah, kids at the last like decade that would be funny, but I don't see it happening man
[00:58:59] I think the funny is the funniest outcome is him everyone who has a patreon us included just loses all the money
[00:59:05] And then you know, they're doing they're trying to figure out what the next thing that would honestly be awesome
[00:59:10] I'm about to work in the peep but a judge White House who means I'm free. It's it's it is the funniest outcome
[00:59:17] Yeah, just people with 35 different socialism podcasts being like
[00:59:29] This is how this we've always talked about the man would really harm us what dude politics kind of nauseating
[00:59:35] So we're gonna take a break. We're keeping the name eat the rich kill kill fuck rich babies podcast
[00:59:42] And the heckin yeah heckin witch antifa eat the rich babies
[00:59:49] Punch a Nazi podcast is now about the baby Yoda
[00:59:53] Where we discussed different to just you know, just different frickin baby Yoda memes
[01:00:04] Dude just like you know what just take a step back and maybe give people the benefit of the doubt
[01:00:10] You know a lot of this like cancel stuff. It's like yeah, not the best move
[01:00:29] It would be awesome everyone just goes back to being bacon
[01:00:32] I say well because it's like a yikes man. No one wants to admit that they're just fucking like
[01:00:38] Literally capitalizing on a trend. Oh, yeah, could not be cannot more so be doing that it's straight up trickle
[01:00:44] Everyone's trickling off chapo's balls. Basically. It's all everyone's you lapping up that water coming off
[01:00:50] They're nutsack and we're like a baby taking a shout. We're teflom
[01:00:53] We got you can't stick any of that shit does why because we got a motherfucking sound
[01:01:07] Fuck this a noted socialist podcast right that would really affect us big time
[01:01:14] I mean as long as the whole ship goes down no, we'd be actually hilariously fun
[01:01:18] I think we'd be absolutely but because we're cursed. It's like we'll never be free. That's why
[01:01:25] Yeah, I guess and because we'll be doing this one. We're fucking 80 that will be next to this next to the grave
[01:01:35] How there you yeah, I would like to see the podcast bubble burst that would be awesome that'd be great
[01:01:41] And what kind of bitter people that creates this would be yeah, this is such a horrible art form
[01:01:45] And I hate that it's the most like the most popping one right now wait for this
[01:01:51] Yeah, like Brandon's podcast fell apart. That'd be hilarious. Yeah, what would Brandon do?
[01:01:56] What's funny to watch Brandon too, who is our friend?
[01:01:59] But yeah, that's why we're mocking him friend of the show because he is our friend
[01:02:04] Everyone we mock were friends because Brandon's only like a couple years younger than us and he's old now
[01:02:09] He's old he's like 27 and like what will happen when like he because he's probably not on TikTok
[01:02:14] No, he's got a gun being young it's over but there's no it's not like he can grow up in anything
[01:02:21] No, he's grown up his way. No, you know, you're just gonna wait. He has grown up. He's embarrassed about ox court DJ
[01:02:29] You're gonna watch because it's like, you know, yeah, he'll just it'll be fucking 10
[01:02:32] He'll be like the Tony Hawk guy yelling at those Mexican women
[01:02:37] Well sure, maybe I don't know I'm not saying good or bad
[01:02:41] It's just interesting to see like youth culture pass up somebody who is so like deeply entrenched in it
[01:02:47] What's what happens anytime anyone's like young?
[01:02:50] He's gonna try and do the Justin Bieber cut his hair get sexy. I think he actually he's trying to be a fits guy now
[01:03:03] He became a fucking classic if you try to be a menswear
[01:03:11] Classic man, you can be me if you got HIV
[01:03:21] You can be me if you poop and be a bathroom man nice. That's a good one. Yeah, baby. I'm the bathroom
[01:03:28] I'm the bathroom man. I'm the bathroom man. I'm the bathroom man
[01:03:36] Yeah, I don't know what anybody's gonna do. What do you mean?
[01:03:40] What in the future? I'm gonna retire to Baltimore. Just like doing one man, please
[01:03:44] I'm gonna get that nose job because zoomers are fake. That's not a real thing. Yes. It is. No, it's not. Yes
[01:03:49] There's no generational gap. Yes, there is why do you mean people at iPads? No, it's it's it's like people that are slightly older
[01:03:57] Excusing themselves for being bad at the internet by being like well, you know, it's because these kids. It's a different generation
[01:04:04] What do you mean? There's no generator? There is of course 100% different than us younger motherfuckers
[01:04:09] But they're only I'd say that there's not a pronounced generational gap between the two that like warrants
[01:04:15] I think there is what like between us and like what a fucking 15 year old
[01:04:21] Between somebody like 1920. Yeah, dude. There is bro. There is
[01:04:26] I don't know what it is because we're old that's the thing you don't know because you're old no because we never went to school with like
[01:04:31] Trans kids for instance like that kind of stuff isn't a as big a deal
[01:04:35] I think like virtue signaling isn't as big a deal to them because that stuff is like more normative to them
[01:04:40] I think that's such a minor distinction
[01:04:43] Why because I think all of us like did shit that we regret when we were younger as millennials
[01:04:49] They probably saw a cultural shift now the biggest thing the biggest things are like the ubiquity of the internet and like 9-11
[01:04:56] And it's like I don't I mean I guess yeah, there's they don't remember not a little thing man
[01:05:01] You talk to people who like yeah, I remember dating a girl is probably like
[01:05:07] You are the one who's it speak up now if you disagree
[01:05:19] Adams whoa Adam what the fuck didn't they muted me? Oh, sorry. I'm back anyways
[01:05:25] Yeah, no, but it's like she grew up in like California and she's like yeah, I remember seeing I love I had no idea what the twin towers were
[01:05:31] Or anything so she that's okay, that's just one person. Yeah, but we only care about hot people. That's also true 9-11 never mattered
[01:05:39] Mmm. Yeah, that's true. I don't know here's the thing. I'm fucking stupid and I'm not thinking about it
[01:05:45] But I just of course there's gonna be differences that we as old motherfuckers
[01:05:49] Because that's just how the world works puppy though sure yes, and I'm saying there there will be some sort of some like
[01:05:58] Or like demarcation point I guess between this generation the next one. Yeah, I don't think it's it's like what's identified as zoomers and
[01:06:09] Like clearly distinct cohorts going back to my theory if we have multiple kids
[01:06:14] Like if I have multiple kids they'll probably be dating each other having sex with animals. No, you know absolutely
[01:06:20] You'll be having sex with them you I'm not gonna be having sex. I would be like a dead-ass
[01:06:29] Yeah, let's add an extra eye to the LGBTQ
[01:06:34] That's your big friends. That's your big move. No, that's you know, you know my theory. Yeah, I don't think it's just coming up
[01:06:42] But what do I know we don't have to get into it?
[01:06:45] It used to be with like younger people there used to be like a like a clear difference between high school and college because like
[01:06:51] The only way people in high school would get access to what people in college are consuming is when their older brother or sister came home
[01:06:58] Mm-hmm like the holidays gave them that REM record literally yes
[01:07:02] I mean like exactly that kind of shit and it's like with the internet that doesn't exist anymore. Mm-hmm. So it like
[01:07:08] Really muddies any kind of like generational distinction
[01:07:13] Or now people are locked in a state of like permanent adolescence
[01:07:17] Well, that's true like the amount of people that are like, you know that they're like to the extent that they're like
[01:07:24] Left activists or whatever. I mean it sounds exactly like people
[01:07:28] I knew who like we're into raging against the machine when they were fucking 12 years old. It's like it's childish larping
[01:07:35] You're responding to the leftist activism on the internet. Oh, yeah a lot of the aesthetic of it
[01:07:41] I mean sure it's like there's a difference between
[01:07:43] not the actual thing but I mean yeah if you have like a like a fucking account with a profile picture of like
[01:07:49] Karl Marx or whoever. Mm-hmm. Clearly this is like an aesthetic that you're curating mine's Chris Bosh personally
[01:07:59] And I do it because he's black. Oh, yeah, so you can digital blackface you digital blackface and I'm sure there's like a
[01:08:07] You know an example with anybody that's like a
[01:08:10] Fascist or whatever. I mean, I'm just not like paying attention
[01:08:14] Do I don't know if like Pepe is still even a fucking thing. It's great for now
[01:08:18] Is that the same thing? It's the same thing. I think it's an ugly air pepper and now I think Pepe is
[01:08:25] Can be left no. Oh, yeah. Yeah, Dem sucks
[01:08:31] People like I don't I don't fucking give a shit. This shit is gay. Yeah, that is it is
[01:08:40] I will dude. Oh about this. Okay, you want me to you want me to I got a good one for you next week
[01:08:47] Is the last funny moms of the year? What date is that that is the 16th? I said literally hold on Adam
[01:08:54] Not not playing date. So I have one for you. Oh go
[01:08:58] Is it worse to circumcise a baby with the suck its dick?
[01:09:02] What a circumcise 100% but then it's worse. What about doing both?
[01:09:06] That's true. Can you imagine if there was a cold? Oh, yeah, that would be horrible. It's a very rare thing that we're back on track
[01:09:12] No, see I told you and I honestly mean this I think it's literally worse to circumcise a baby than the suck its dick
[01:09:19] Look if you don't care if you can't put whatever the conversation is then come in with the hypotheticals. Yeah
[01:09:24] Yeah, I'm sorry if you got shamed out of bringing the hypotheticals in or not
[01:09:29] That's not so can we talk about it? Absolutely. We can talk so what do you rather talk about that?
[01:09:34] So let's do it do you I cuz I I don't want to say my point
[01:09:38] I know what your point is and it's a very rare thing. It only happens. No, I'm not I'm not no
[01:09:43] That's Nick's point Nick is coming with the anti-Semitism. Okay. I am coming with purely
[01:09:48] It's barbaric to chop up a baby's penis. I have to answer honestly
[01:09:52] Yes, I don't know even if I marry a Jewish woman. I don't know if I will sir
[01:09:57] No one asked you what you're gonna do. What is worse is the question? No, what I'm gonna do is suck my baby
[01:10:04] I'm not saying you suck it it. Yeah, that's your gun who says
[01:10:10] Yeah, can we can we isolate that it's very suck my baby
[01:10:15] To answer honestly, I don't know if I will do that. I
[01:10:19] Think I didn't ask you that I asked you if a baby and I answered you ready not your baby
[01:10:26] Right in theory is it worse for a baby to have gotten sick sucked by a random person or to get its cock part of its cock chopped off
[01:10:37] The long term muted my mic. Oh, no, I'm back
[01:10:41] Nick, what are you doing on the board don't can we just come we engage in discussion Mike again? Okay now back
[01:10:46] Is there any evidence that it has any like lasting
[01:10:55] Dramatic impact I'm trying to get like clean the audio of him by himself saying he would suck a baby
[01:11:01] Okay, all right. Yeah, you go right because we're doing it in one channel. We're doing it in one channel
[01:11:08] And now no, but you told me what you wanted to do. I'm not gonna do it now
[01:11:15] I'm not gonna walk into this trap. Do you feel all alone? I do feel all alone. I don't like it
[01:11:21] Bill Burr Monday podcast just be solo ranting about Boston sports
[01:11:28] No, I think that I think that it is I don't know about the psychological impact of what would happen to a baby
[01:11:36] That got their dick side, but I don't think it could be as bad as getting
[01:11:47] Circumstising a penis is not getting it. But dude getting your little baby dick socks for like a set like 10 seconds
[01:11:54] You got it's like getting a bath probably just feels nice and warm for a sec. Yeah, but I think that maybe if
[01:12:00] Maybe it's not smart like a three day old baby is definitely not getting like the psychological damage of being molested
[01:12:08] Okay, but here's the thing okay, you know, we need another question charter schools
[01:12:14] Good or bad, you know when you meet like a French person right? Yeah
[01:12:17] And they're like they say things that are like extra cringe and like because they like in Europe
[01:12:24] like they're like have you let their hair of like a
[01:12:27] Bob Dylan like those kind of guys those guys are really
[01:12:32] Yeah, anyone who would bring that up isn't I would never say have you ever heard of Bob Dylan?
[01:12:36] That's a stupid thing. No, you would just throw on the documentary and start crying
[01:12:40] I wasn't crying to the documentary and you guys didn't even last long enough to know what the point
[01:12:48] What's your take on this issue Nick hold on let's hear Adam. Let's hear Adam's take from inside his bedroom. Go ahead Adam
[01:13:03] He's in hiding in his bedroom. Can you come out dude Adam? Can you just please come out?
[01:13:07] You don't have to cry in your bedroom. I'm not in my bedroom right now. You just change my microphone
[01:13:18] All right, well, you know, that's the thing I wanted to talk about and since we're done talk
[01:13:23] I guess no one's to engage me honestly with beautiful
[01:13:28] Other news stuff you know already saw the generation stuff so please come to settled come to funny moms the final
[01:13:35] Year the 16th. We're gonna get all our friends favorite favorite guests gonna be a fun show. It's gonna be about Brandon's future
[01:13:42] That's settled. Mm-hmm. Yeah, Brandon's done come to Houston this weekend come to fat Tuesdays at the stand on the 17
[01:13:50] Were you going bathroom again to have diarrhea?
[01:13:53] And then it's not I have it. These aren't getting released it, but Milwaukee
[01:13:58] Appleton Lincoln Lodge Chicago to have his period I will be there the 2930 at 31st and 1st
[01:14:04] He's gonna be at Lincoln Lodge of January and February during the Rock Johnson here for the Lincoln Lodge
[01:14:10] I'm gonna be at the comedy connection in Providence the six through the eighth six through the eighth the tickets are free
[01:14:15] They are not where they cost money. I'm gonna be in hyenas at Plano, Texas
[01:14:19] Vagina's vagina's the jineenas the 13th through the 15th Valentine's
[01:14:23] They come be my valentine high mean eenas and I'm gonna be at the DC draft house of 20th to the 22nd
[01:14:28] Full-ass February I will be in San Diego in February for a funeral
[01:14:36] One of my family members is there and if you can guess who then you get $20 off awesome
[01:14:46] And then I think I'm going to fucking London and
[01:14:51] Maybe some other shit. So anyway come suck us off come fuck me come see me on the fucking road
[01:14:56] Uh, fat Tuesdays every Tuesday starting on the that's a busy February. I'm going a lot on February brother. Damn
[01:15:05] No, I'm here though because it's all it's all weekends. So it's like
[01:15:08] So it's not I thought a lot of travel. I'm just like we could do that
[01:15:11] We could probably stick to the regular schedule for most got shit got you got you got you
[01:15:20] Gotta ask you about that too. I'm gonna be
[01:15:22] My schedule yeah, I'm being Tokyo at the end of January
[01:15:26] But if you are an English speaker, I'm gonna be having a show for no English speakers or recording my special
[01:15:33] Me and a room of Japanese people that do not speak English. That would be awesome
[01:15:37] And I'm gonna do a little bit of my poopoo cock. I'm gonna do all my classic crush
[01:15:42] And I'm just mad at him and doing Japanese comedy
[01:16:10] You can only go like alright guys. That's the fucking show. That's the show