Cum Town | Regular | 11/25/2020
[00:00:00] We're just gonna spoilers we're going random. It's like Nick and I saw Phantom thread
[00:00:04] Do you know I spoil Phantom thread to me didn't see it we saw it we saw it man
[00:00:10] But there was like an NPR New York City New York City audience and then the force laughter in the theater
[00:00:15] It was just the two of us were looking at each other was it funny. I thought it was he was a man at the end of the movie
[00:00:20] There's a punchline you realize the entire thing has been building up to a punchline
[00:00:24] I don't even know your most to spoil and then Nick and I started laughing and then everyone else in the theater was silent
[00:00:30] New York, baby. Yeah, he likes the abuse
[00:00:34] It's it's it's about abuse. Okay about people that that's enough sit conflict is I've heard enough
[00:00:41] I might have to switch out. Do I sound like I got a weird sound. I'm not wearing cans
[00:00:46] Do I sound I don't think so whatever fucking fuck it dude
[00:00:50] I mean next time on the next one we get fixed luckily. I've been brought a separate cable, but we're already 56 seconds in
[00:00:57] I know we're gonna stop and start a late. I would just swap the cable
[00:01:03] We had to lose that I would absolutely I would just we were just talking about our breaking stuff
[00:01:18] What a beautiful day is today, yeah, what is it? What's the date Nick of the episode that it is today wink wink
[00:01:31] No, I just need to have the copy in front of me before oh, so this is a regular episode on a premium
[00:01:37] This is a regular episode stop letting people into the workshop exactly the workshop of the mind
[00:01:43] This is our two sentence conversation. We usually have before I'm trying I was you gotta be a professional item
[00:01:49] Dude everyone knows that I'm the professional in the group no absolutely not everyone that's what they call a professional dancer
[00:01:58] You're a provident sir. You suck off a gay guy for money
[00:02:02] It's just starting to imagine the studio being like well
[00:02:04] We like the script but you can't call it Leon the pedophile
[00:02:07] Yeah, how about the professional what's the difference?
[00:02:14] Yeah, and it's their problem if they say that that little girl is hot. Yep. That's all you know
[00:02:19] We dress her up like no we put a little baby. This is my wife my baby. Why is my
[00:02:29] Now I have to kill I have to kill the bad guy because my wife she demands that I kill her
[00:02:34] That's the same guy that did the fifth element correct. Yeah. Yeah Luke pizza. Do we are
[00:02:40] I would I would love that on the lineup this week. I watched it
[00:02:46] You did a couple months ago. It's another movie. That's clear a pedophile wrote it this time
[00:02:55] Lady's body, but she's got the brain of a child. She's a really trying to learn English like well
[00:03:00] She's getting smarter faster and faster. She's growing up. It's lit this guy is
[00:03:05] Everything he does war is he should he should be able to go to jail off of those two movies alone
[00:03:11] There two movies about be like it's not using being a stop trying to ruin jacking off to her in the bandages
[00:03:17] Oh man, I've made the point before but it's just it's so funny that first scene in the movie where they
[00:03:23] Reconstruct her from like that alien's arm. Uh-huh and then like the general of the space army is like
[00:03:40] Stick even gets hard. Yeah, because it's a PG-13 movie. Yeah
[00:03:44] I'm in my opinion that is peak Tucker the Tucker cruncher
[00:03:53] Ruby roads. Yeah a gay intergalactic radio host. Mm-hmm. I love that the show their show was just done while walking
[00:04:03] That was you remember that part where I haven't seen it in years, but it was like an Aaron Sorkin themed MTV
[00:04:12] They go down hallways. Yeah, I had to come all the way to space to be gay. Tell me what are you doing here?
[00:04:19] You like an Indian blue bitch are there white versions of the blue bitch
[00:04:25] On your planet. Do they got white blue bitches and you're the Indian type of blue bitch
[00:04:32] Shouts out to Chris Tucker you like the the Kamala type of blue bitch on in blue world. Yes
[00:04:39] What are they white what are the white people are they green?
[00:04:42] What are they called white people where you're from?
[00:04:50] And and and Chris Ruby Rose is the lady that's who's that she's like hot
[00:04:55] But she has short hair and they're like she's she's a fucking gender queer icon because she has a short haircut
[00:05:02] Yeah, I mean she tapes her titties up and she's in I think she was in orange using you black
[00:05:07] But I you know if somebody's hot as shit they don't get points for being brave I think
[00:05:12] Uh-huh in my pages because you call the show the L word doesn't mean I'm not gonna jack off to it
[00:05:17] It's actually the J word. It's jumping off is the
[00:05:23] Ruby wrote is a character no no Ruby Rose
[00:05:26] Talking about someone someone who's hot a hot lesbian or I don't know if she's even or she's by or if she's even
[00:05:34] Or maybe they're they I think if I had to guess
[00:05:36] She she they strike me as a they they're hot the bad guy for the only is named John Baptiste
[00:05:47] Yeah, it's Gary Oldman, right? Yeah, yeah, where are the storms? Oh
[00:05:56] I'm gonna be working for evil aliens that are destroying everything
[00:06:02] I think but they just like usually that's like the double cross that they tell them oh you're gonna be safe
[00:06:08] But this movie they're just like oh, yeah, no, we're also gonna kill you
[00:06:12] But you have to do what we say and Gary old was like, yes, I'm gay. Yeah, and he has the hair to the side
[00:06:18] He has the alt right haircut does have all right haircut with a plastic thing on his head damn
[00:06:23] I want to see that movie. I love that movie father Vito Cornelius general Monroe
[00:06:33] Doesn't Bruce will try and rape her too. Yeah, who me legit? Yeah
[00:06:39] He holds her down in Fox are in the goes you pick a
[00:06:45] That rape was actually a Christmas dude this director needs to go to fucking prison
[00:06:51] It's legal there is it can you be so Western sorry?
[00:06:55] I think so America. I'm fucking uptight provincial you'd think my Greek roots. I would be you know
[00:07:02] Yeah, but these what I the thing is covering for the crimes here people thing is I come from a culture where
[00:07:09] It's got to be a boy you to mathematics more
[00:07:13] Yeah, and that but you stop when he's a man or he's gay not like a slutty girl
[00:07:18] Yeah, let it go. Let it go. This stuff is so the song from the fifth element that the blue bitch thing
[00:07:24] It's impossible to sing actually did like computer generate tones that humans can't make interesting
[00:07:30] But the closest they got was an Albanian no
[00:07:34] Wow, this movie sucks. I decided in Vamula in Vamula. Yeah, okay, you know what I'm in the mula is some pussy
[00:07:44] For pussy by long car one no do a joke with the name don't just let people know you know the name of the movie
[00:08:05] Without even thinking for a second for pussy boy long car wide long hard wide
[00:08:10] It's that yeah, but you know what it didn't and why because you want people to know listen guys
[00:08:23] Episode it's funny because yeah, yeah, I guess that's true. Um, you're you're like
[00:08:29] Your inability to help yourself with that and stealing jokes. It's kind of like
[00:08:33] We all three of us have a specific sickness
[00:08:40] In Europe we make have real problems with food and we're addicted to it in a way
[00:08:46] I'm like fully accepted that I have like a just a straight-up eating disorder for sure that I'm obese as I do you are first of all
[00:08:57] Cuz I'm not obese at all. I'm in much better shape than you are and it's everyone knows that my addiction is is
[00:09:10] That is that is actually literally true
[00:09:15] But also you're addicted to stealing. You know what my problem is improving that you know little facts
[00:09:21] That that is truly the worst thing in the world and you do it and you have never in the in the years that we've known each other
[00:09:29] You've never tried to I've been working through it in therapy. I don't think you have
[00:09:32] I don't think you have the impulse that a Jewish person has to say oh is Jewish like if Sammy Davis Jr. Comes up
[00:09:41] Something that I've deliberately tried to work through in my life. All right. It is obnoxious
[00:09:46] Well, I would just say and the tidbit thing is like that's weird because I just don't want to eat an entire pizza if I have
[00:09:54] If I just fuck up and have one garlic knot
[00:09:56] Listen, we all have our crosses to bear. Yeah, and then it's like all right. Well, let's start the show
[00:10:01] Let's start the show. Let's get the show going. Let's eat a whole damn pizza
[00:10:05] Let's eat the entire pay and after you finish the pizza. You're like anybody go for some wings
[00:10:09] Well, we order some wings just pretending like someone else at the party ate the pizza. Yeah, I guess we all ate the pizza. Yeah
[00:10:17] It's literally like eating drinking hand sanitizer on a on a bus and then waking up
[00:10:26] Prostitutes ads. It's a little feels so good though to just fucking just go off the rails
[00:10:30] Oh, when you go off the rails the day you go off the rails is the best day of all time
[00:10:33] Yeah, it's the next day where your head is just swollen with sodium. Yeah, you just have diarrhea
[00:10:40] Dude, I feel hungover but from food just purely cousin's birthday and I felt like my ribs were separating
[00:10:47] My cousin's girlfriend was like that's what pregnant women's
[00:10:53] Dude my stomach gets so fucking like bloated and hard. It's like literally it's like that episode of king of the hill where con
[00:10:59] It's the hot dog eating contest. Yeah, the ring of fat that stops you're stomach from expanding
[00:11:04] Yeah, my stomach bumps up against the ring of fat very often
[00:11:09] Yeah, I was actually thinking about koba yashi last night respect whenever yeah, how does he do it with a six pack?
[00:11:16] Exactly what con was talking about. Yeah, I mean, it's yes
[00:11:19] There's no ring of fat to stop him. I look wild after a night of like overeating distended belly probably yeah
[00:11:26] I mean, I look I look insane. Yeah, it looks so on the top. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
[00:11:37] Because everything else is so emaciated that the stomach
[00:11:41] Just kind of like pops out. No, I think it actually does swell with something about a deep
[00:11:49] That picture of that vulture waiting on that kid is one of the most fucked up things I've ever seen in my life
[00:11:54] Ever will see birds are cool. No fuck birds. Absolutely. They're dinosaur's dude
[00:11:59] I honestly I would fucking kill every bird if I hit it was up to me. I'm not a fan except hummingbirds
[00:12:05] They're cute and they're little and shit. I don't like I won't say every bird
[00:12:11] I guess we can keep chickens alive and kill them in the factories, which is what they deserve
[00:12:16] Every bird should be treated like factory-formed birds. Yeah, mm-hmm. That'd be they would cool in sesame street as big birds
[00:12:23] Just in a cage and Gordon's like pulling eggs out of his ass
[00:12:27] He's being forced to keep making eggs bitch
[00:12:31] Big bird's like I just want to teach the alphabet
[00:12:34] Yeah, well, how about I got some letters for you right here?
[00:12:42] And then they're like whoa, whoa, don't be fucking homophobic Gordon
[00:12:46] He's just we're just treating him like like this because he's a bird not because he's gay
[00:12:50] Mm-hmm, then we'd have to put bird in her knee in cages as well
[00:12:53] You know it'd be really funny like just because kids wouldn't even get it if I worked for sesame street
[00:12:57] I would definitely I would spend every day of my life trying to get into the show
[00:13:01] We're seeing more like you know Elmo's with like a kid or something like okay, Gloria. Let's go see Gordon
[00:13:08] You know and they're like hey Gordon and Gordon's there with like
[00:13:14] And then the letter and it's like I'm really sorry Gordon and Gordon's like don't worry about it man
[00:13:19] Just fucking don't you know and then Elmo's like what's going on Gordon? What are you guys talking about?
[00:13:25] And Gordon's like it's nothing Elmo. It's not a big deal
[00:13:29] Between me and N. Yeah, so what do you guys learn in today shapes? And then it's just that's it
[00:13:34] You're gonna just I'm gonna say you would not be able to get that in yeah
[00:13:43] I would say like well, maybe just Gordon has a difficult relationship with the letter N and Elmo's like what?
[00:13:49] Why are you in the letter and mad at each other Gordon?
[00:13:53] And he's like because people have history Elmo
[00:13:56] We didn't all just suddenly appear right when you were born
[00:14:00] There's a context to everything that's based in identity
[00:14:04] And if you I think the more detail I'm getting the less I believe you'd be able to know
[00:14:09] I think it's kind of a nuanced conversation that needs to be sure
[00:14:14] Yeah, children need to confront I think I think they they shoot sesame Street and queens actually so yeah, we should just start
[00:14:23] Waiting up and full camo. Mm-hmm. Yes, or we show let me write for the show
[00:14:28] We show up dressed as snuffle up. I came all the way to Queens from Brooklyn
[00:14:36] Why don't we just show up dressed as the muppets?
[00:14:38] Yeah, and sneak in that way just dress up as Elmo. We're like, oh, I'm here for work
[00:14:56] Still around I remember that guy now you say was he a grown up? Yeah, he was grown up. Yeah
[00:15:01] He was a grown man that hung out with babies
[00:15:04] And we're up it's Gordon was Gordon like Afro Latino wasn't there like or was there just a straight up Latino guy on there?
[00:15:12] I don't remember at all. Will you not assessing me straight by Roscoe?
[00:15:17] And don't you dare say I was a Barney guy because that shit was gay too. I was a Barney guy
[00:15:22] Dude, I was a Barney guy too. I was mainly a sesame Street guy. Remember being mad. Oh, he's still on sesame Street
[00:15:28] Let me see on sesame Street since 1962. Damn. He's a legend. Let me see his picture
[00:15:34] Yeah, I don't I don't I there's a Latino guy on it too. Isn't there?
[00:15:39] I should have taken a shit. I should have taken a shit
[00:15:50] Dude, it just started happening when I was the second I was not thinking it just took over. Oh, hold on
[00:15:56] 1970 professional, but 1974 to 2018 is how long Gordon was on. Oh, wow, he's in retirement
[00:16:05] Do you think he like hated sesame Street the way we hate the podcast
[00:16:11] I think I gotta go do you with these fucking kids again
[00:16:18] How to fucking send pizzas to your house. Do people do that? Oh, yeah, that's gotta be dangerous for you
[00:16:25] Uh, it's fine because I it listen if they were prepaid I would see that as a form of respect
[00:16:32] Have you bought any of them? No, I never have you've never been tempted. Well, can I be honest?
[00:16:39] Honestly, if I were the CEO of dominoes and like I would just start doing that to people
[00:16:45] Like pick neighborhoods where do you like get the data figure out who's fat?
[00:16:49] Mm-hmm. Yeah, you're like, oh, you know, somebody you ordered this. I guess just send the drivers out. It's terrorizing San Antonio
[00:16:55] Yeah, yeah, because somebody's gonna buy them and then they're gonna think of it's free marketing
[00:17:00] Oh, you know what they could do say look
[00:17:02] I'll give it to you for half price. Mm-hmm. And then it's free and then you're covering your costs
[00:17:07] Yeah, more people will do it and then they have a taste for dominoes. That was a classic
[00:17:12] Tom green bit the price cutters pizza where he'd fall around the delivery guy. Oh, yeah, that was really good
[00:17:19] You know what I would do? I would tap the phones of Papa John's and then take orders
[00:17:24] Uh-huh. And all my local dominoes locations
[00:17:27] And then see where try to get the pizzas to them for the same order, but from the dominoes menu
[00:17:32] Get cash and be like no, I guess you ordered dominoes. Then be like weird
[00:17:36] I didn't think and then just steal all of their customers
[00:17:39] That's what I was a CEO if you're doing
[00:17:44] Regardless of the fact that makes you play the credit card probably yeah, well, I would make it illegal to pay back
[00:17:51] Okay, so you would lobby the government smart
[00:17:53] You're only allowed to buy pizza pre non prepaid cash only cash only cash on the barrel you have to get a barrel you have to have a barrel and
[00:18:02] And then you but you would make it legal to tap
[00:18:10] I got a question. How did how did anyone get so poor that they had to just wear suspenders and a barrel
[00:18:19] Like no one ever did that. I don't think that was so poor. I think that was the irish being so drunk
[00:18:28] The irish got so drunk they don't live in a barrel
[00:18:31] I sold all me clothes. This is be life now. I sold all me clothes and now I have to live in a barrel
[00:18:39] It's saving me so much time my wife smatted me because nine of our children died last week. We only got 15 left
[00:18:47] Dude how blown out with those irish pussies in the early 1900s
[00:18:51] They said that there would be a great future for us in in Brooklyn, but it's nothing but me beating my wife and
[00:19:03] Did they even have like the the like um
[00:19:07] Thread that shows up pussies after the babies are born back then the husband's stitch
[00:19:12] Did they even have that they probably did I guess they were doing the surgery if it's after the civil war. Yeah, I mean
[00:19:19] That's when yeah, that's when yeah, that's when field surgery really
[00:19:27] I'm just I'm just thinking damn. He was on Samford and son the same time to sesame Street. Oh, hell yeah
[00:19:32] My mom was getting paid. So our Robinson. He was played Gordon Robinson
[00:19:36] This is these are the names of his characters. This is funny because you go from the 70s to the present day
[00:19:41] Yeah, let's see if the names get more yeah
[00:19:43] Afro centric his first role is willy the second one was Gordon Robinson
[00:19:58] Adrienne I guess he was greek for two years Marcus maybe using Marcus ain't greek bro. Maybe it's a Roman. Yeah, Gordon Robinson
[00:20:06] Uh captain wallinger malcom captain ralston gordon robinson sir eddy
[00:20:15] Gordon robinson judge gordon robin judge pops gordon robinson gordon robinson mr
[00:20:27] Train waiter jojo boss officer Oscar record m mike stanton
[00:20:39] I guess that was gone. Yeah, I thought it would be funny if the name step were like
[00:20:44] Willy africa bum bottom. Yeah, and then you get further in his career and it's like fucking
[00:20:49] chicken tikka misei misei misei misei mbeau
[00:20:58] Wouldn't have ever mind. I'm not gonna say what that would make more sense for him. Yeah
[00:21:06] He put it. Yeah. Yeah. He put it gone into my head and made me suck his dick
[00:21:33] This is fucking annoying. So we we have to we have to do reads and usually just
[00:21:37] I keep a timer on my phone or whatever, but I tried setting up the iPad and the iPad keeps shutting off
[00:21:43] You can do that and you can fix that in settings and settings. Mm-hmm. I don't know about any of that stuff partner display
[00:21:49] brightness listen, I don't know anything about settings more of a
[00:21:55] You know about characters sure dialogue, of course, you know, no, sir. It's the settings on your phone
[00:22:01] Plot driven plot points. I don't know like I wrote a story. I'll write a story sometimes
[00:22:08] You know, it could be a western. Mm-hmm. We're talking 1870. Yeah, you know in the middle of a Yuma County
[00:22:15] Yes, or a space opera doesn't matter. It would be you could cast this characters are the same characters are the same
[00:22:21] Just go to settings on your phone when you're not that if you to see just the brightness needs to go up
[00:22:26] And but I know I didn't even get pussy until I was 27 years old
[00:22:36] Problem is they have all your information now, right used to be able to prank call customer service department
[00:22:41] So I guess you still can it's just you can't get really passed like if you pretend to be old
[00:22:46] You can get past they're like asking for your name. All right, you better like I don't know
[00:22:52] They get in there like sir your name, please. Well, that's a good question
[00:22:57] But what's really important is this is the keys
[00:23:05] And that's not the same as the one on the computer
[00:23:08] It's not the same one. What about this thing with a key chain here? Is that do I click on that?
[00:23:18] No, sir. Do I what do I do? I deleted it
[00:23:22] I deleted everything. Yeah, well, I'll tell you what if you want to delete
[00:23:27] Your dicks inability your soft if you want to delete your soft dick. Yeah, you can
[00:23:32] The the leak some blue chew pills the leak them they're delectable actually they are they taste really good
[00:23:40] They taste really good. They're basically candy. I eat them alone all the time just because it's like well
[00:23:49] They are a lot like smarties. Yeah, and you could probably give them to a kid and he wouldn't even notice damn
[00:23:53] I miss smarties now. I was never a smarties guy
[00:23:56] I I wasn't a smarties guy, but you'd get them on Halloween and you finish eating the good candy and then there'd be a thing of smarties
[00:24:03] You'd be like you like fuck it smarties were the top tier of the second choice candy. Yeah. Well, what's that tier?
[00:24:10] Build it out for me handy mine. I'm really candies. What are the minor league candies smarties milky ways
[00:24:19] Three musketeers three musketeers. I'm milky. There's also milky way milky ways
[00:24:23] But it's a second tier can you don't fuck with milky ways. Here's the thing if you put if you put oh my god
[00:24:28] If you put three musketeers in the top tier then they're dog shit
[00:24:47] The Canadian League of that world is baby roost and payday sure I
[00:24:53] Would you have a hundred grand bar lives in hundred grams good? They're good. I'm just saying they're playing in different leagues
[00:24:59] 100 grand is what it's a side say I think I have no problem bumping hundred grand up to you know what you're right
[00:25:05] It's a you're it's from a different league, but it can play with them. Of course. It's a ladder
[00:25:09] Yeah, we have exposition games we're eating right hand. Oh, right. That's right
[00:25:13] But I would go hundred grand a baby Ruth over milky way shut the fuck up
[00:25:18] Hundred grand. I need a crunch. No baby Ruth can suck my fucking dick. Anyways blue chute tastes like smarty
[00:25:24] Yeah, and it's a pill that gets your dick hard hardy. Okay, you know what I've my penis it sucks
[00:25:34] When I when we when I first when I when I the first time I had sex not only was my dick bent
[00:25:40] Hmm, but it was small it was small and it was soft and it's not I explained to the girl
[00:25:46] She's screaming. She's crying. I'm holding her down. I'm telling holding her down. It's not bent
[00:25:51] It's the only the one side of it works. Let me fuck you sideways. We're gonna
[00:25:56] Jesus then it'll be straight. God Jesus Christ. It's like you know you deal with these fucking brad
[00:26:03] These fucking hers and they worse you gotta I don't know
[00:26:08] I fucking we doing a Chicago. Yes, we're making fun of people from Chicago. Yeah, anyway my dick is shaft
[00:26:22] Everybody Chicago. That's the thing. It's a Chicago thing. Yeah, I don't know what it is everybody else
[00:26:27] They got straight dicks that goes down and then it goes out my dick. It kind of hooks around in a weird way
[00:26:33] It's like a and you could use it to serve deep dish. It's like a warped piece of lumber
[00:26:39] You know, it's a piece garbage. It's anywhere else. It's garbage. It's I'm gay. I'm gay too
[00:26:46] There's a lot of people in Chicago. It's a Chicago
[00:26:49] You know in New York you get a New York style of pizza and that's real flat
[00:26:54] What we like is being bent over and getting fucked with a gun door
[00:27:00] New York Chicago. Yeah, they call it a New York Chicago. That's a Lou Melnati
[00:27:09] And that's where you get put down on your knees your your partner takes a blue chill, huh?
[00:27:14] He's dick gets hard and then he puts a nine millimeter in your mouth. It makes you suck on it
[00:27:19] That's right. Well the blue chew kicks in
[00:27:22] Now point, you know, you already got a lot of saliva built up on the mouth from sucking on a gun
[00:27:32] And you wake up your blood and you're crying and you maybe check out an improv comedy
[00:27:38] Call that a Chicago typewriter. You know what that is. What's that?
[00:27:42] It's a typewriter where you write all your gay secrets on it and put it away in a little drawer where your mom can't find Chicago style
[00:27:48] No, cuz you're sharing you're sharing a
[00:27:51] Where there? How's it got Chicago bungalow?
[00:27:53] Yeah, you know the living in a Chicago style bungalow with my mom since 1973
[00:27:58] And I when I was 13 I picked up a Chicago typewriter, right, you know, which a lot of people
[00:28:06] And you tuck it away for years they kept it in a drawer
[00:28:09] But one of my stepdad's found that while he was looking for pornography
[00:28:12] Mm-hmm, and I had to bludgeon him to death with the baseball bat. Yeah, well he took me out into
[00:28:19] a garage and he he put he put stapes he stapled my butt cheeks closed
[00:28:27] And he said the only way anything's getting in here is if they got one of those old
[00:28:32] This things you pretended was a monster. Yeah, those jaw things a little monster. Yeah, the fang good luck
[00:28:37] Find one of those in Chicago. The only thing we have here pal is dildos
[00:28:40] That's always a little bit back then of course only topping on a deep dish pizza was a big sloppy dildo
[00:28:49] Yeah, oh greased up with ass juice and cub right
[00:28:53] But the point is when you're getting fucked Chicago style you want to make sure your partners got blue
[00:28:59] They want his cack because it's the same generic ingredients as Viagra and Seattle
[00:29:05] Chicago style they call that deep dish dick pills
[00:29:12] The pills are thicker, you know, it's a same same milligram dosage
[00:29:16] But you can use them as earplugs. You don't have to listen to the sound of your son being sodomized
[00:29:25] You know you got to do a lot of thing Chicago rents are going up
[00:29:29] She true everybody's moving to Chicago because the coronavirus right you heard that because and so just to be clear
[00:29:39] Because of that you've said has to get a right room out in your house in your
[00:29:49] That's why you need a deep this style of bleacher this style dick pill you get it right here in Chicago
[00:29:54] In your ears or in your mouth you plug it you plug it you put it in your ear and it works in your ear, too
[00:30:01] Yeah, that's how they call that taking dick pill Chicago style
[00:30:07] It's a slow burn because everybody in Chicago. They's got a bent dick
[00:30:11] So you really only need half the pills is get that the good side of your dick heart
[00:30:17] Right the south side gets hard in your then the top stays limp so the whole thing curves back around interesting
[00:30:24] And then your dick is kind of the opposite where the south side is good on your dick in Chicago
[00:30:29] Everybody's city the south side it moves back and points at you and you walk around with your pants down
[00:30:36] Or you hey you were talking to me right because that's in the dick points at you right and they can't do that in New York
[00:30:43] That's why you got to have you know the neuro
[00:30:44] He's got the little gun in the movie right remember that that was sort of a a reference to Chicago
[00:30:49] Yeah, but however by when he pulls when he whips a gun out of his sleeve that was score says he's saying I've been the Chicago
[00:31:01] We all know about the cocks situation in Chicago the way their cocks point back
[00:31:07] So anyways you want a couple is Chicago's this style blue shoe pills
[00:31:19] NFL and guess what you don't got to go to an old fucking back to the NFL reminds me of my friend Phil so then
[00:31:26] Great guy. Good guy. Yeah, Chicago guy Chicago. Oh really? Yeah. All right. That's weird
[00:31:32] You know what I knew that because I knew him from Chicago and we grew up there together
[00:31:37] I know guy and never let us just cock looks exactly like you described
[00:31:41] I've been living on beaker Street in Chicago my entire life right north side. They got that like sure
[00:31:47] Yeah, every street is just streets from New York, but you take a letter out. So I never even I lived in yet beaker and
[00:32:01] And mubbery yeah over there on mubbery Street mulberry
[00:32:07] Yeah, no, I was living in the mirror for a long time and now it's not it's the wrong city
[00:32:14] Whoops there you go. You don't pay attention for a second. You end off summer completely different
[00:32:24] Philadelphia it's like Chicago, but nobody's gay
[00:32:28] but none of that weird game in Western stuff and
[00:32:31] And you don't got to go to no gay doctor you do it all online
[00:32:37] Yeah, New York Chicago or or Philly. I forget. I don't really know where we are anymore
[00:32:41] They got thin crust pizza in New York in Chicago. They got deep dish and in Philly. They got whites only pizza
[00:32:54] Yes, right. That's what that means. Yeah, whatever. I guess it's got a like a cream type of cheese also
[00:33:01] Yeah, we got cream cheese. That's our type of shit
[00:33:03] So now go now go you can do it from your home in Philadelphia. You can go to yeah
[00:33:12] Give me a second here. Let me get back to we got to get back to talking about blue
[00:33:17] Chew we going back we doing Philly or are we doing in Chicago? I can't tell the father
[00:33:22] I can't do Chicago anymore. I think it's lost
[00:33:30] The fuck now we're not capable of it now I can't I hit my limit with that fucking city
[00:33:39] It's it doesn't help the chick it doesn't help the Philadelphia's you know what I think bundle you would
[00:33:44] With the problem sleeping slip into it no problem the problem is that you try to do Chicago and you've ruined it for me
[00:33:51] Well if you were actually good at the voice it wouldn't matter without the fuck I was dead. Oh excuse me
[00:33:56] I am actually good. Okay. Well then why the fuck ain't you being able to do it yourself?
[00:34:00] Because you started talking and you I was doing it pretty good
[00:34:03] I slipped one time and that's one time and I went right back
[00:34:10] We're on it you had to go to fill on a tandem bicycle here and you fat footed those pedals backwards
[00:34:16] I did it one fucking Tom and you ruined the whole thing bicycle fell over now
[00:34:20] We look like a couple of fags on the side of the road with our bicycle falling over
[00:34:27] That's a funny mental images to gay guys on a tandem bicycle. That's just in a gutter. Yeah, and they're like
[00:34:45] Tanned the bicycle a dildo in the seat of course and then yeah, but that's go and like one of the sky rider banners flying behind it
[00:34:53] It says blue chew calm. That's right, which is a great website if you like sex. Yeah blue chew calm
[00:34:58] You go there you go over to your hood come down go to promo cold calm town and you get a
[00:35:06] Intro and they're like James Sean and thief you say what do you got dick pills?
[00:35:10] You got a chink you got a Jew chink kid will take that right?
[00:35:16] Well, why don't we just do the promo code? It's a highly emotional. It's a great scene. I'm first of all I'm quoting one of the
[00:35:21] Quoting to you. I know maybe after the how about instead it's Jack Nicholson at the beginning of the department. No
[00:35:39] That's a blue chew calm you promo code come town. That's the thing Chicagoans don't realize I
[00:35:45] Don't want to be your product to my environment. I want my environment to be free
[00:35:58] We got to get the beat back on the board though. Oh, we do need to be for sure get the beat back on here
[00:36:06] Go to blue chew calm promo code come down get your first order free or free shipping or something
[00:36:11] Yeah, they come the point is you want your dick hard Billy get it Billy beat boys Billy beat boy
[00:36:17] Yeah, the Billy beat boy. They got a couple of beat boys down there
[00:36:22] Yeah, they call him beat boys cuz they well, I'm not gonna explain it
[00:36:27] You know why they call them blue chew calm promo code come town or come town 20
[00:36:34] Blue chew blue blue blue blue blue blue chew blue chew and let's start
[00:36:40] Let's start to show let's start the show blue chew down
[00:36:49] They said suckers the dick you're the piano
[00:37:08] Yeah, I don't know anything about the settings I'm more of a I
[00:37:13] Do to plot I'm more of a plot guy. I do the plot. I've never really cast anything that is dependent on a setting
[00:37:24] About it's more about cool shots, you know
[00:37:29] Putting Bobby the Nero somewhere where you look at him and you say now there's a guy that not only fucks
[00:37:34] But he does crimes that is crime's any I can see his balls
[00:37:37] You know I remember the original draft of heat. I just wrote the word fuck down on a piece of paper
[00:37:44] And I thought where's the Chicago Michael man. That's where he's from. Oh, yeah. Yeah, well, yeah for real
[00:37:50] I think thief was his first or one of his first. Oh, I had no ideas
[00:38:05] But you wouldn't score points with the other Jews no, but I did do it in the voice of me trying to be right
[00:38:11] Which set myself up her failure. It's a character you do Adam trying to be right now David Mammon David Mammon's like first draft or something
[00:38:20] Just being the word fuck and then I wrote down fuck on the piece. Oh, that's why I met mamet
[00:38:24] Not Michael man. Both of them are Chicago man. It's your Chicago. Yeah
[00:38:28] Huh the three guys from Chicago or Michael man David Mammon and shell soldiers thing. Yeah, she'll still receive Chicago
[00:38:35] Yeah, Chicago. I fucking love shell soldiers Jim and John Belushi. That was my guy's a little kid
[00:38:40] I used to love those books. Yeah, and he looks like he fucks. I didn't see a picture from till pretty late in life
[00:38:46] Yeah, you know, I grew up in Chicago, Southside and that's why most of my movies they deal with a you know guy saying fuck
[00:38:59] Like what if you what if you're trying to get some pussy right right but the gang they need you to do one more crime
[00:39:07] You know, you got to really what you want is pussy what you want is pussy
[00:39:11] But you also don't want to be enslaved by the pussy right you got to put you got to put work in between a pussy and you and really
[00:39:17] That's right. It's it's chiefly concerned with the idea that freedom is is sort of like not only not possible as
[00:39:25] A state of being but it's impossible is even an abstraction that you can comprehend because these men don't even know what they're trying to escape to
[00:39:33] It's certainly not pussy. It's being shot to death by Al Pacino in the in an airfield
[00:39:39] And while while that bullet presses into Robert De Niro's heart the audience can't help but think you know
[00:39:45] He's probably thinking about suck again. Yeah. Oh, yeah
[00:39:48] He's probably thinking about what he really wants the entire time which sort of whole movies about being gay
[00:39:56] Tugging on his tugging on his little ponytail while you suck his cock. Yeah, I don't know if that's
[00:40:04] It's not how I saw it. Hey, listen when I invited you on to do the DVD commentary. I didn't say
[00:40:11] I didn't say you get you're just here to say yes. Hey Bobby. I didn't see him as a gay guy
[00:40:17] I didn't see the gay guy. I didn't see him that way. I even when I you know when I do this with Marty Marty
[00:40:24] Usually holds my hand and we thought she's other spinners
[00:40:27] But the character's not good characters not gay. I'm gay with my the character
[00:40:42] I'm doing it. I make it a little money. I'm director Michael man, and this is Robin Williams
[00:40:50] That little go to make sure you wonder if it's held on with calm
[00:40:57] You know I always wanted to do heat with Robin and I wanted him to play all the characters original idea was that it was
[00:41:06] And you know the big joke is that we never get to see these men having sex with each other
[00:41:14] They didn't really get it. They didn't see it as a comedy. That's how it was you thought it was
[00:41:18] Yeah, it was too nuanced. It was too much of a heist movie
[00:41:21] We thought it was really about the bank robbery rather than this idea that these five guys are gay with each other and they can never
[00:41:31] You know moment in the hallway where they bump into each other and all the papers go scattered and they pick it up
[00:41:36] And they you know one hand falls on the other yeah, they realize it meet cute a meet cute
[00:41:40] They're hidden desires. Yeah, you know realize so they have to be bank robbers, and that's you know
[00:41:49] Yeah, we're Robin Williams playing all the most expensive
[00:41:53] But he's you know, Mrs. Doubtfire. He was busy with that, but he actually made all his own clothes and costumes
[00:42:00] When I met Robin and the motel six off sepal Veda and
[00:42:09] We used to meet up there every Thursday, you know, we would tell our wives respective wives
[00:42:13] We had a business meeting and me and Robin would show up and he'd be dressed as Mrs. Doubtfire and I'd been them over and fuck him in
[00:42:22] I said, you know what would be great if what we could do is reshoot heat shot for shot or with you playing all the
[00:42:28] Characters and then release that as a director's cut, but the studio said we don't have another 40 million
[00:42:35] We don't really have the money to reshoot the whole thing a lot of people think heat the name is about the heat the police
[00:42:42] But it's all it's really about the hottest cut kinds about the heat emanating off a man's ass hot gay sex
[00:42:49] You know, yeah, well, that's what always interested me about gay sex
[00:42:53] It wasn't the temper wasn't the act itself is that when you do it without lube the friction that's built up in an ash and
[00:43:00] And you know eventually, of course you ejaculate. Hopefully not too early
[00:43:06] Hopefully it's you know, you have time to savor the the act is
[00:43:10] Is is that when you finally pull your penis out of a man's ass and you're completely hard?
[00:43:15] You know because this is you know, it's not the wife
[00:43:17] You've been the best type of sex your fucking Robin Williams dressed up like a British grandma in a motel sex and
[00:43:25] You're harder than you've ever been in your life and it it pulls out and you can see some of the
[00:43:31] The inside of the rectum come out a little bit and then he builds up it reminds me on both
[00:43:37] Literally and metaphorically the Big Bang and it makes me think well God was probably
[00:43:42] You know if God exists or whatever your conception of God is is a guy going out
[00:43:50] He's out on the bearback exchange. He's fucking right
[00:43:53] He's fucking right and he's in the clubs and he's on drugs and he's getting aids in the club
[00:43:58] Right and dry and high and that's why you know
[00:44:01] You've Angelicals so say that God sent aids and you know, it's like well is this even really a punishment
[00:44:07] Right, you know because there they take the wrong the wrong they got their wrong idea when they think about it because AIDS actually makes it the sex
[00:44:14] Even hotter it's like having a gun to your head
[00:44:19] And it's I don't think it's a coincidence that the
[00:44:27] Emergence of the HIV virus coincides exactly with gun control laws in the United States
[00:44:33] So true because there is never room to really have the conversation about whose effect that most by
[00:44:39] By gun legislation and that is of course bear back exchange gay guys. I love showing guns
[00:44:44] Would you look at that heat is over well hope you guys enjoyed the commentary
[00:45:11] The barrel can I go back to New York now?
[00:45:17] Okay, I guess who is through yeah Bobby really didn't take the Chicago
[00:45:24] Difference between a culture of Chicago
[00:45:28] That Bobby really didn't seem to come I love Chicago you guys are just a couple of homos yeah
[00:45:34] I just thought I don't know if I want to get HIV I
[00:45:52] Wanted to saw to get HIV and only Val Kilmer agrees
[00:45:57] Of course we brought David Mametton for just some suggestions the thing he pressed harder son
[00:46:11] Fuck yeah, well I'll tell you all the characters should get HIV and you know what else all the characters should get
[00:46:17] Is manscape is their cockshade if their penis is groomed there's nothing in here. I should have printed this shit
[00:46:24] Yeah, well, you know this the good thing is the kid we know the products
[00:46:29] So this is no we do but also they like this is the copy for the winter. Oh, okay
[00:46:36] Brace yourselves winter is coming. Oh, man. Do I miss game of thrones?
[00:46:43] The writers of game of thrones didn't want to tell you is
[00:46:46] Brand was actually in a wheelchair because he didn't trim his balls of an landscape. That's pretty good
[00:46:51] Poor guy thought it was okay to trim his balls with a traditional race. Oh, that's funny. That's funny
[00:47:00] Winter is coming so if you don't want to have a cock so hairy that you become a wheelchair bound
[00:47:09] The fucking best motherfucking cock it is nice because I just kind of accepted that you know
[00:47:15] You're gonna cut your dick in balls. Yeah, it's gonna be a good you were doing it with a straight razor
[00:47:20] And just nicking things I was using I was using a katana. Yeah
[00:47:24] Which a rusty katana I still maintain that that probably is the best way to do it sure
[00:47:30] It's just I don't have the skills and let's face it. I'm an American. That's why I use an American maid
[00:47:36] Let's see if they're probably not probably
[00:47:39] American made man, but American soul American branded
[00:47:43] American thought up that's what's more important at this point now having your shit made in China by slave labor is more
[00:47:50] Quote unquote American made. Yeah, I trust it more. Yeah, of course
[00:47:54] It makes me feel more American knowing that some Chinese person's life was my enemy. Yeah
[00:48:01] Logical enemy right that guy in the factory. Yeah
[00:48:06] Because that's all we have with China is the trade war
[00:48:10] So a sense of superior. Yeah, why would you want American? May you don't want some fucking guy in America?
[00:48:17] Having a shit job you want a Chinese guy having a shit job the American guy at home shaving his balls living on welfare
[00:48:24] That's right. That's right. That's the dream. That's the dream
[00:48:26] You can account you can achieve that you can achieve dick dick razor
[00:48:33] Communism right by going to manscape calm massive got calm and pick up the new lawn mower 3.0 trimmer
[00:48:40] It's beautiful and it comes with little Hispanic guys that landscape
[00:48:52] They work really hard they hire me a man skid and I have to shade their balls
[00:48:58] And I use a lawn mower 3.0. Yes, that's great. It's quiet
[00:49:04] It's waterproof the battery lasts it doesn't like fucking time
[00:49:08] It's got a light so you can shave your cock in the complete darkness
[00:49:14] Advanced skin safe technology to reduce nicks and cuts even as a light to help you close shave down there exactly
[00:49:20] Yeah, that's quite it's like you already said that no, right? It's like I didn't even need to read it
[00:49:26] Yeah, the weed wacker ear and nose hair trimmer
[00:49:29] Yeah, I'll be wack those nasty weeds in your delicate holes
[00:49:33] Oh, I got a delicate hole for you pal. Yeah, you got a you got to clean your ear out before you put the dick pulls in there
[00:49:39] That's right Chicago. You got your son Chicago guys
[00:49:45] Yeah for shelter too much hair you can hear your son. Yeah, I was taking my son to a cubs game
[00:49:52] And got molested in the bathroom. Hmm. I couldn't hear because I had too much hair in my years
[00:49:57] Interesting and that's after that I started using the weed wacker now the damage is done that boy skired
[00:50:02] Right so might as well put them out on the street get a little rent money
[00:50:06] You know, I mean it's like your best case scenario he ends up as a director
[00:50:16] Worst case scenario he ends up as a New Yorker
[00:50:22] Jeez it's weird that there's not more rivalry between Chicago and New York now we we don't even a fucking right
[00:50:28] I mean there isn't at all isn't it one of those rivalries that only goes one way. Yeah, yeah
[00:50:33] It's like Baltimore DC like we don't like DC no the no one in DC gives a no about no no one's like
[00:50:38] But we're like fuck DC. Yeah same way Chicago. It's like look whatever you're cute
[00:50:43] You're in the middle of the fucking country. You're the best city there
[00:50:46] But come on suck one for this New York dude the performance package includes a crop preserver
[00:50:51] So do you order in for your balls to protect against chafing?
[00:50:55] Also to crop a rival tone or keep your boys fresh at all times
[00:51:00] Yep, if you're wondering why I talk like this just because I've gone deaf from using the wrong kind of ear hair trim
[00:51:08] That's right. That's before I got the manscape one the fucking weed wacker and you know I it doesn't say in here
[00:51:14] But I'm assuming you can also use it on your asshole
[00:51:17] I'm gonna say don't use it on your ass don't try to use it on your
[00:51:21] Have smelly feet the manscaped hope with her foot dust. I'm sorry, but this is all just disgusting to me
[00:51:31] This is disgusting keeping up keeping a nice fucking grown I don't have any of these problems
[00:51:38] You don't have I don't smell. I don't have body hair. I do have long nose. There's no way you don't smell
[00:51:44] I don't smell the I that is with the one of the craziest ideas you just like your own brand
[00:51:50] I've lived with lots of people knowns ever complained because you fucking shower. It doesn't mean you don't smell. I don't smell
[00:51:57] I've smelly feet manscape can help you with their foot dust or foot deodorant made the fight odors of the dirtiest feet
[00:52:03] Want to smell good everywhere good because the refined cologne by manscape
[00:52:09] Fresh scent designed for the refined gentleman. Yep, so if you were a tuxedo you got it
[00:52:15] I was laughing the other day about wearing a tuxedo to somebody's funeral
[00:52:21] Mean black tie. I thought you had the drawer where a suit
[00:52:27] On top of everything maybe you can turn in the shed travel bag the carrier goods and it's a nice bag
[00:52:33] The bag is nice. They're using it right now. All the accruiter mods are nice. Love it nice
[00:52:40] You know, I mean if you're the kind of person who keeps their shit together or whatever
[00:52:43] You know like my the skin under my beard bleeds. Yes. Yeah, and I'm constantly just bleeding and chafed
[00:52:51] I don't I have you've resigned yourself. I've had mental illness. Yes
[00:52:55] Uh-huh so for me as a mentally ill guy if I wanted to convert to being uh-huh, you know
[00:53:01] I who this is a way I do it. I don't be like Nick. I do a whole
[00:53:09] Mm-hmm get 20% off and free shipping with the code
[00:53:17] It's XX X in the copy but it's probably come down. It's probably come down. It's probably come down
[00:53:22] Just try that 20 try it's come down 20 remember what the first time we got advertisers the
[00:53:28] I think it was I don't remember what the company was but the promo code was Nick Mullen podcast
[00:53:35] That's so funny you want to say come down
[00:53:38] Well the big biggest win for us was when
[00:53:48] Come down 20 let me just double check here. It's one of those fucking two you can you're smart people
[00:53:54] You guys are smart. You want clean shaving cocks. You fucking you listen a smart podcast. Yes, you know it's important
[00:54:01] Then we get the right okay. You're a hometown 20 all right
[00:54:03] Come down 20. Yeah, come town will not work. It is deactivated
[00:54:09] Come town 20 okay the proper promo code
[00:54:12] So use come town 20 to get 20% off your first order and get your dick shaving it so nicely
[00:54:22] Stop you tried the shears tried the shears clip my nails looks nice. Yeah Brittany shears
[00:54:29] That's what they should have called her when she shaved her head
[00:54:32] You know yeah, you know I was never attracted the women but when I stopped right knee here's
[00:54:38] Here it's yours with the shaved head. I wanted this I wanted to at least get my dick
[00:54:42] So I wonder if I couldn't see your I want to just pop that fucking bald head right up my ass
[00:54:48] Want to fucking jam her in there like a door
[00:54:53] You know just have her get her stuck in there and then run around waving my ass around like a peacock
[00:54:58] Just fucking windmill in her whole body with my ass. Oh, yeah torque off the side of a yacht. Oh, yes, sir
[00:55:09] Damn, I hope Brittany's okay. No, she's not I know dude. Yeah fucking dad or something's got her locked up
[00:55:15] She's yeah, she lives in a conservatory now or something. Yeah, she's a
[00:55:19] Conservership or something. I got something you can conserve Adam. What is that your fucking words? Okay?
[00:55:31] I'll take that to heart. I love what it's it's not gay and it's just just purely disrespect
[00:55:42] Appreciate it actually, you know, well if you did you would listen to his advice. Yeah, I never will
[00:55:51] My heart ass dick is killing me. Yeah, nobody should
[00:55:57] Don't do anything that I did including the joke formats
[00:56:10] I don't know occasionally. They'll be one somebody like one probably one out of 90
[00:56:17] There'll be somebody that's got a so even give them that don't do that man. They're gonna shoot their shot at a
[00:56:22] I don't care. They're gonna do it anyways
[00:56:27] But one every once in a while somebody will do one of my car, right? And I'll let them know yeah, I'll be like, okay
[00:56:33] Respect he's a benevolent king not that I'm the authority on it's got it. It's boy. That's problem is people understand
[00:56:40] It involves between you and your friends exactly and there's a lot of people that don't have friends
[00:56:52] On the friends for not that the jokes themselves are funny. It's that we hate comedy
[00:56:59] And we are stupid in the way you're only supposed to be stupid with your friends exactly that's right
[00:57:06] I'm not even good at comedy. I'm put I'm no friends part. Yes, right? That's my way up to this. Yeah
[00:57:14] Well, you're better at the friends part than comedy without
[00:57:20] Without throwing any value judgments. I'm a great friend. I'm a great lover. You're not I don't think that's probably
[00:57:26] No, I think it's true. I think you're fine probably if I had to guess how you fuck because you know why you don't have that much to prove
[00:57:32] Oh, yeah, no, I mean, I think you and I basically have the same basic
[00:57:38] Don't want me in grift, which is that we just make it sound like it's gonna be really don't let me in
[00:57:44] I don't make it sound like it's gonna be I make it sound like it's I say my dick is bad
[00:57:48] I said I'm good at I say it's really small and the sex is bad
[00:57:52] And then if it's just a D minus then it feels like a word for the I can't help myself
[00:57:57] I have Mediterranean passion in me. Uh-huh. That's true. Fuck beautiful
[00:58:02] You're an olive skin sex. I'm supposed to be on a beach getting tan getting my dick sucked by tourists
[00:58:08] Oh, Trump conceded. I guess well for real. He did. Mm-hmm. It's gonna be so pretty in December whenever the fuck it does
[00:58:27] Jingle jangle on Netflix this looks gay, you know what I just remembered when uh some Christmas movie
[00:58:36] He was there was he was doing Christmas calls to kids. Oh, I guess it's a black Christmas movie
[00:58:48] No, I mean, it's not Jordan Peele. It's
[00:58:53] The other guy might keep my key in Michael key. He can Michael key. Yes. Yeah, he's good
[00:58:58] I like him. Yeah him and then I guess the fucking son. I'm just a teacher on Matt
[00:59:02] He would have for trending topics on very funny when it first came out was also a nice soft landing sure handle lunch
[00:59:09] They had that they had a good sketch on my TV the two of them key in peel where it's like two
[00:59:15] Two like guys like squaring up to each other and then getting gay or in gay or with one another. It was very fun big
[00:59:30] I was just remembering when Trump was calling kids with my exactly the one you're gonna say
[00:59:36] Are you still a believer in saying he's like you're seven?
[00:59:39] I mean, it's kind of borderline at this point. Are you still a believer in Santa cuz it's seven years old. It's marginal. It's marginal
[00:59:49] Funny as president ever yeah pretty funny. We'll never they'll never take that for them
[01:00:00] No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, fuck yeah
[01:00:07] I did press it the record, okay, but I don't know what that thought so that that could've been a disaster. I don't know
[01:00:15] It's well, I know which one it is do you would you are we cruising or do you want to
[01:00:21] Because we can keep going okay. I thought it would be funny to stop the show after it would be countdown
[01:00:25] Yeah, what did I just do though? What button did I press this one luckily didn't do anything?
[01:00:29] Okay, just to be safe. We should I don't know the
[01:00:35] Difference between the record and the play button on it. I should fucking look at the man
[01:00:39] I've had it now a year and I'm just gonna keep deleting episodes
[01:00:47] Hey, come on. I mean doing the show fun
[01:00:50] But that's a that was always made me laugh about comedy is like you'd see guys you see guys on stage
[01:00:55] You've been doing comedy since 1993 and they'd be like so what they caught it
[01:01:00] They call it a firehouse cuz firemen live there
[01:01:03] But they don't call it police at you know
[01:01:04] And then the quarter drop out of the mic and then they'll fumble with it for like fucking ten minutes
[01:01:19] Stool and my nothing have most of them don't know how to use a mic stand. Yep. Yeah, and not a mic stands
[01:01:26] I've just broken mid-sest and then been like okay. Well, this is oh Mike said is it possible?
[01:01:31] It literally took until this year for me to understand how to use any of that
[01:01:35] My son is like an internal combustion engine. I mean that's that's engineering right there
[01:01:40] Yeah, I love the simple one you just do the twist one is the classic
[01:01:45] This one is the best one. Yeah, and that's a cool part of the movie. We don't need the bend below the
[01:01:49] Oh, it feels great. Yeah, that's that's actually one of the benefits of being short is the power move of lowering the microphone
[01:01:56] It is a lot of people think it might be a masculine
[01:01:58] But it's not when you fucking you got that like little wrist action. Yeah, let's sit down
[01:02:02] And you're like let's get to work cuz it looks like you're assembling a pool cue
[01:02:07] About to like I sure pal I could play a couple of games
[01:02:10] I don't know much I've never played pool before in my life. I'm just a fag from Chicago
[01:02:25] Anything about shooting pool or even money it how to gamble never done anything like that in my life