Cum Town | Regular | 12/02/2020
[00:00:00] Okay, good morning. Good morning everyone. Now that I got this, that's 15 hours remaining.
[00:00:08] That's alright. We're trying some, we're doing a little adult swim on the other side.
[00:00:13] Oh yeah. We're doing a little straight swim. Yeah, so on this one. Guys with regular dick swim, I wake up, I wake up at like 6am every day.
[00:00:24] Yeah, so I'm up, you know, nicks up. I'm walking around doing karate down here in his robe.
[00:00:29] Oh yeah. And then, you know, Stav wakes up, because Stav has sleep apnea, so he wakes up.
[00:00:36] That's not the reason I would have. For a different reason. I have a machine that regulates my sleep.
[00:00:41] He wakes up with sleep apnea. I don't wake up with sleep apnea anymore. And in fact, my Fitbit could tell you right now how many hours of sleep.
[00:00:50] Oh, you're asleep? Yeah, it did. Tried to sleep. My dad's got sleep apnea. And I got him an apple watch.
[00:00:57] And he was like, all excited to use the sleep tracker. But I'm like, you got to charge your ship while you're asleep.
[00:01:02] No, dude. I mean, I guess he could probably charge you during the day. That's what I do.
[00:01:06] Because he doesn't do exercise. Right. So that's why I need the apple watch. Because it's like a track.
[00:01:11] You're not fucking every hour of the day. You're not doing exercise.
[00:01:14] Well, I'm at my desk doing a little something like charging. I use it as an activity track because I try to hit the minimum like...
[00:01:21] Right. But you're sitting at your desk working for at least a couple hours. That's when you charge it.
[00:01:26] No, I'm constantly standing. In fact, I'm standing right now.
[00:01:31] I didn't even hand you my jacket. I got six hours and 34 minutes of sleep last night.
[00:01:39] I was awake for 46 minutes of it. Really? Let me check my...
[00:01:44] But that's mostly in the morning when I just kind of wake up and lie there.
[00:01:48] Let me see. How do I get it? Yeah, dude. This shit rocks.
[00:01:52] I went to bed at 1.53 a.m. and I woke up at 9.13 a.m.
[00:01:56] Yeah. See, this just you can only set a sleep call.
[00:02:01] And I was strapped up to the apnea mask with fucking beautiful fresh air.
[00:02:08] Pumping into my lungs. Yeah. Anyway, ensuring I don't die.
[00:02:12] I'm up early. You know, I'm up the second earliest. I'm getting my shit ready to go for the day.
[00:02:18] Stop, wake up. Wake up. And we said it wouldn't be funny if we just didn't wake up at him.
[00:02:28] And it was such a good idea. He's right upstairs.
[00:02:41] He's probably... He's dreamy. He's probably just fucking... He's in bed.
[00:02:46] He's in bed looking... He kept Tumblr somehow. His is the only Tumblr that doesn't not have point anymore.
[00:02:52] He's in bed masturbating to pictures of his girlfriend.
[00:02:55] What about the loser? You're on vacation, bro. Look at porn.
[00:02:59] Look at porn. He's got a picture of... They had another friend shoot it from behind.
[00:03:04] It's the two of them in Harvard Square Hold in hands.
[00:03:08] And he's masturbating to that picture in the autumn.
[00:03:11] He's got a scented candle that she likes. She's smelling that.
[00:03:15] Mm-hmm. You ever jack off the smells? No.
[00:03:19] But there's been... You know when you use somebody else's shower and he'll use a shampoo of somebody that sucked you off at one time.
[00:03:29] Absolutely. You get hard looking at that blue curls. What was that one?
[00:03:34] You know that one? Yeah, you gotta have a cut beat off in the shower.
[00:03:38] Of course. You walk out. You're like, that thing's a bath now.
[00:03:45] Give that about 25 minutes before you look at the drain.
[00:03:49] Don't look at the drain at all. I remember when I was like 13, I discovered beating off in the shower.
[00:03:57] I discovered it. I didn't know you... Yeah, like Christopher Columbus.
[00:04:03] Busted for a busted. Columbus. Busted for a made-compest.
[00:04:08] There we go. I need the money. I need the money.
[00:04:11] So I go on my boat and beat off. I need to go to the boat. I can't get off over here on the sea level.
[00:04:16] I want to go see if there is... If we could go around the world if there's a way to put your penis in it.
[00:04:23] My idea is that the world is not... It's round, but also there's a hole on one side.
[00:04:35] And you can fuck the globe like a big beautiful lady.
[00:04:43] I made the two million francs for that.
[00:04:48] Here you talk to the queen of Spain. He went to every fucking queen of Italy.
[00:04:53] Italy Spain. So Columbus, he was Italian, but the Spanish fondant, right?
[00:04:59] I believe so. And according to Furio, I think he was a Northern Italian, what did he say?
[00:05:07] Columbus. I don't like him. I don't remember where Columbus from.
[00:05:12] Because he's not Napoli's. He's not Napolitan.
[00:05:19] Yeah, he was a fucking... He was just begging monarchs who were trying to get their cloud up.
[00:05:27] Who discovered America? Columbus. Oh, so it was him.
[00:05:32] It's kind of like I said that Columbus...
[00:05:34] This was America of Espucci. Everyone talks about him, but I've never heard his story.
[00:05:40] The Pussy of the Penis and the Suckumup Penis?
[00:05:43] Exactly. The Pussy of the Penis and the Suckumup Penis.
[00:05:48] The Penis of the Geneté de Cacapu, see?
[00:05:51] Suckin' the fucking N' Sickin' the Dickin' the Pussy.
[00:05:53] The Suckin' the fucking N' Sickin' the Pussy.
[00:05:55] That might be one of the most beautiful collections of syllables that has ever come out of my mouth.
[00:06:06] Suckin' the fucking N' Sickin' the Dickin' the Pussy.
[00:06:08] Suckin' the fucking N' Sickin' the Dickin' the Pussy.
[00:06:09] Suckin' the fucking N' Sickin' the Dickin' the Pussy.
[00:06:13] I was just sorry. I was a little bit sorry.
[00:06:16] It makes me feel kind of like a dick-a-boo.
[00:06:19] How the call it fell is my feeling when I do the raps.
[00:06:23] Absolutely. I feel like Twister right now.
[00:06:26] I feel like Twister, I feel like it's the mid-2000s, and I'm fucking doing a guest verse on everybody's fast song.
[00:06:36] He's just fuckin'... I don't know if he's American, but you do this like weird-look British character.
[00:06:46] Honestly, everything you're saying sounds gay or by the instant.
[00:06:50] It's one of the worst things that has ever been made.
[00:07:02] And I dig all you cats out there whipping and wailing and jumping up and down and sucking up that fine juice.
[00:07:08] And patting each other on the back and telling each other who the greatest cat in the world is.
[00:07:13] Mr. Mallon called Mr. Darling called Mr. Lison Hahn, who's in the weeds and Meissen-Woozer.
[00:07:17] And Mr. Whithill and Mr. Beachhill and Mr. Tricey and all them hills, they gonna get it straight.
[00:07:23] So it's basically, it was a black guy that did the voice...
[00:07:26] Or white guy that did the voice rather than paint himself.
[00:07:32] But it was like spoken word black voice.
[00:07:37] Y'all trying to get some pussy but you ain't got it.
[00:07:43] You ain't getting no motherfucking pussy.
[00:07:46] We only got two kinds of sweet potatoes.
[00:07:48] We got regular sweet potatoes and we got yams.
[00:07:54] Stick your dick straight through the damn thing.
[00:07:57] Looking like a train going in the tunnel.
[00:07:59] Coming out the other end covered in orange.
[00:08:01] Orange, sticky, icky, ookie, gookie, baby, please.
[00:08:10] We use the cover I had but put her son dress down and use it as a squeegee.
[00:08:16] Clean all the windows off and coop the fill.
[00:08:20] Big old bubbles like a retard will blow while he's asleep.
[00:08:24] Coming off his hand so big you could go live in it like a bi-old dome with Paulie.
[00:08:29] Remember that Paulie is sure you would do yoga in the movie?
[00:08:38] You get an even guy he was so flexible from the yoga he could suck his own dick.
[00:08:43] You got two ways you can suck your dick.
[00:08:45] You can either bend or you can have a big dick.
[00:08:51] For some men they got hogs so big they can suck them standing up.
[00:08:59] Other guys are going to fold up like a pretzel.
[00:09:03] They call him Snyder the penis hider because he's bent over and put his cock so far down his own throat.
[00:09:14] Don't ever hear coffin maybe because of the...
[00:09:20] Sucking all my penis getting my dick hung.
[00:09:23] Taking it out, putting it in the man's hands.
[00:09:30] Taking it in the store, pulling my dick out.
[00:09:37] Biggest you ever seen so big she clipped herself mourned and the whole damn thing blew up.
[00:09:44] Bit so fast she grew a swastika on her ass.
[00:10:00] Not Bubba Sparks or something like that.
[00:10:08] I saw somebody say a slur when he was in eighth grade.
[00:10:18] One of the worst things I've ever seen.
[00:10:29] That's one of those kids where it's like, you know, they make all these common sense arguments
[00:10:34] It's like, yeah, why do children do that to each other?
[00:10:38] I mean, it's really, you know, you think back about like, you know, because both dulled out and
[00:10:42] deep, there's a lot of like emotional trauma that everyone goes through in the first, you
[00:10:48] Just because like human beings are kind of ill suited for socialization.
[00:10:54] You know, I mean, some people are, I mean, I don't want to say.
[00:10:57] They're not ill suited for socialization, but just because they're fucking shit heads and
[00:11:01] cruel and like, yeah, you know, it's like that is sort of part of, it's not all, it's not,
[00:11:05] you're, you're, you're, I guess, libidinal impulses to, to be aggressive or, you know,
[00:11:11] be aggressive or shitty towards people aren't properly sublimated yet at that age.
[00:11:16] Mainly because we don't allow children to join something like a, like a police organization
[00:11:21] for, for youth, like a, like a hit or youth army or something.
[00:11:25] No, cause a lot of that, a lot of people, they, they, one of the good things Hitler did.
[00:11:32] I mean, look, if you had a way for children to properly sublimate their libidinal impulse
[00:11:39] and get their words, organization of state violence, they wouldn't need bullying.
[00:11:45] And one of the things that marked Hitler's Germany was how peaceful everyone was as an adult.
[00:11:49] Anyways, because you got out of your system.
[00:11:53] They got it out of your seat, but I, I will make this argument and it, okay, you can fact check
[00:12:01] There was no bullying in the house of Germany.
[00:12:13] We're all going to do conflict mediation.
[00:12:21] You, with that guy, you watch that video and you're like, oh, this may or I swatch boys.
[00:12:26] Maybe bullying does, maybe bullying does have a place.
[00:12:32] The type of person who decides I'm going to be a snitch.
[00:12:37] On the snitch, he's getting in on social media now because apparently he was like just shitting
[00:12:41] all over like Rebecca or the creek in the cave or something because they closed.
[00:12:46] See, that's interesting to me because it's like, you're not even a fucking comp.
[00:12:50] Like, maybe some comics could have had, I like the creek in cave, whatever.
[00:12:54] I didn't really experience it and some people really loved it.
[00:12:56] But I don't fucking give a, it's not really my place.
[00:12:59] I wasn't a part of that scene when it was like really jumping.
[00:13:03] This motherfucker isn't even, but I'm sure some comics have a fucking gripe with the creek
[00:13:09] If you're a comic and it was bad to you.
[00:13:13] No, he smelled like diarrhea and it was like.
[00:13:17] And it was just a place for like autistic people.
[00:13:21] The people around there were horrible sometimes half the time.
[00:13:26] To me it would be like a GameStop closed.
[00:13:33] But I just mean, I'm glad now that you know what, the benefit of the creek in the cave closing.
[00:13:39] Is that there's no longer the risk of becoming someone that hangs out.
[00:13:43] You might not wake up at 37 having another PBR on Happy Hour.
[00:13:52] It's a good thing that there's nowhere to go.
[00:13:57] It's like when they clear out an underpass, you're like, well, where are these homeless people
[00:14:03] And it's like probably to a warmer grate.
[00:14:07] This is probably somewhere better than where like RVs empty their septic tanks.
[00:14:17] They'll go back to their five people in a three bedroom and Bushwick apartment.
[00:14:22] But I guess my point was, motherfucker wasn't even a stand up.
[00:14:31] I mean, I don't really know anything about the guy, but yeah, with his like SNL grudge, it
[00:14:38] seems like he just wanted to be somebody that was like a TV writer and fancied himself funny
[00:14:43] because he was like, that seems to happen a lot.
[00:14:48] It's a guy I call it like homework brain.
[00:14:54] Where people who love homework and think but because they're good at school that they're
[00:15:00] And that you can check a series of boxes.
[00:15:04] The opposite is true, which is how Donald Trump became president.
[00:15:12] You know, like it's the homework brain is very similar to that's what I should have said
[00:15:18] You know, even if like that's why I mean, Hillary is the ultimate example of homework
[00:15:23] She checked off every single box of what you're supposed to do to get to do what you want,
[00:15:29] I think the worst era of homework brain was probably like 2013, 2014.
[00:15:33] I don't know if you remember the toast that that website was it?
[00:15:39] Was it like there was a there was a period where like all online humor was like that
[00:15:48] Shouse barely a joke with like way too many words.
[00:15:52] Yeah, it's like what if it would have like texts from Jane Austen is the best example.
[00:15:59] Anything into that formula, which is like here's a reference to college to a thing I had to
[00:16:06] And then, you know, modern Seinfeld is it?
[00:16:11] You know, just updating it or whatever.
[00:16:15] Seinfeld is stealing Seinfeld and not some gay book.
[00:16:24] Creme gets his dick sucked outside of Tinder.
[00:16:48] All I got is getting fucked up playing Settlers of Catan with my boys on drugs.
[00:17:04] Like you have to, you were in first place except for fucking Rainbow Road where I ended
[00:17:10] with a nice third, second place finish.
[00:17:14] Well, obviously got fucked over by Don Quixote.
[00:17:17] I'm not going to say anything about the other Kongs.
[00:17:26] So I don't want to hear anything about how I am.
[00:17:37] But no, you guys don't know how to, and I tried to tell Adam, you don't just drive.
[00:17:42] In Mario Kart, you have to like drift the whole time.
[00:17:49] Yeah, you got to use the shoulder button.
[00:17:58] Because when you drift, like the back of the cart will turn blue and then red.
[00:18:02] Oh, that's what happened a couple times.
[00:18:07] Every time you go over a jump, you got to hit the shoulder button and then it'll like
[00:18:17] I was driving with nothing but panache.
[00:18:19] That being said, I put a lot of time in the racing simulator.
[00:18:23] That's why you're going to edit my drive.
[00:18:25] Nick was in a week, his driving wheel, by the way.
[00:18:27] He was playing Mario Kart in his 800 drive.
[00:18:34] Dude, I did not care about PlayStation 5.
[00:18:40] But if they do like a Gran Turismo 7 special edition, I'm going to get that.
[00:18:46] You got to find a way to get that wheel going again.
[00:18:53] I mean, you kind of let the cat out of the bag already.
[00:19:04] Turning the diar room into a driving simulator.
[00:19:09] No longer pretending that that's an office.
[00:19:17] I'm going to take my laptop from the couch to the office.
[00:19:22] There is a bag of cat shit sitting in there for like.
[00:19:25] It's a rumor I put a contractor bag filled with garbage.
[00:19:42] I want a fucking little arcade machine.
[00:19:48] You know what the best one for home I always thought would be the old Jurassic Park one
[00:20:00] It's like a chucky cheese when you're the fucking cool older cousin.
[00:20:07] You're like, I'm just getting seven year old.
[00:20:09] Getting ahead from Chuckie when you're seven.
[00:20:18] You're afraid of getting molested by Chuckie by getting your little child's dick sucked
[00:20:29] I hope it's a fucking, I hope it's probably a hot girl.
[00:20:32] It's probably a 58 year old man, but I'm pretending it's a girl.
[00:20:37] I'm having a dream and having a cushy dream.
[00:20:40] Oh, I'm having a good dream where the person sucking my dick as a child in the Chuckie
[00:20:46] I can't wait to get my opinion sucked by chucky boss.
[00:20:50] I used to, I don't know about you guys, but if Chuckie cheese was open right now, what
[00:20:55] me and Nick would be doing would be smoking high quality CBD from our friends at cushy
[00:21:00] dreams, getting absolutely not stoned, but feeling good and then going and playing time
[00:21:10] In fact, I agree so much that I have to find the copy for the ad read.
[00:21:15] I don't know how you guys remember this shit.
[00:21:17] It's fucking, it's the same bullet points over and over again.
[00:21:21] For example, with cushy and listen, they're not even bullet points to me because I love
[00:21:33] Are those the ones that if they get in your cock, they'll completely like split it open.
[00:21:41] I hate stuff that goes in your cockhole.
[00:21:43] There's that little fish apparently in the Amazon that swims up your dickhole and then
[00:21:52] Oh, I just got an email back from the business.
[00:22:01] It might be finally be time to switch podcast hosts.
[00:22:15] We've been with Shout Engine for years.
[00:22:30] So like on one side, it's like if something fucks up, you know, it's like this.
[00:22:39] First of all, I can empathize with that.
[00:22:45] Running a business that's successful by accident.
[00:22:50] When the print shop sends out fucking 900 shirts that are completely wrong.
[00:22:54] And then suddenly you owe a bunch of people $40,000.
[00:23:05] Why don't you just be happy for me for trying my best?
[00:23:10] But then the flip side is is that there are also two like incompetent to ever charge
[00:23:19] But at the same time, we had an illegal room in there for three, four years.
[00:23:26] It's like, okay, so yeah, maybe sometimes you got a fucking the toilet gets clocked.
[00:23:28] But also you can have your have your good friend Ryan shut, live in your in an eight
[00:23:34] I think it's finally time to pay for podcast.
[00:23:37] I think I would have a single overhead for this fucking.
[00:23:40] I think four years in or whatever it is.
[00:23:46] You can smoke cushy dreams that show you out while you deal with the anxiety of having
[00:23:52] And they got a lot of different blends too.
[00:23:54] They got now when we're actively doing work, I like to smoke the fucking create.
[00:24:01] I smoke imperialism and that's the game.
[00:24:05] And I'm specifying racism, imperialism, colonialism, that's your favorite brand of cushy dreams.
[00:24:14] My version of colonialism is when an Indian guy walks into a small room and you have
[00:24:18] to open a window because they've got too much.
[00:24:22] That's a very good analogy of what the British did to the world ironically.
[00:24:29] That's what the British did with tea and going, yeah, they made everybody do that.
[00:24:34] Anyway, look, corona, that's what that's.
[00:24:37] It's corona, as when we make the coronavirus.
[00:24:42] And we send it all over with the sponsor about cushy dreams.
[00:24:45] Corona, Corona, Corona, Leo, Corona, imperialism, it's the only way it may.
[00:24:51] Of course it was sponsored by cushy dreams.
[00:25:00] It sounds like the Japanese did the coronavirus not the Chinese.
[00:25:39] I spent like an hour about myself just pretending to be Japanese in the series and having Siri
[00:25:53] Cuz she dreams has you can either get eight.
[00:25:58] Yup, they got 3.5 Gs or my favorite the single pre-roll G gram joints.
[00:26:08] Yeah, I don't really fuck with the, I don't like, because I don't want to bowl, because
[00:26:15] I also got a nice little lamp from my apartment.
[00:26:21] Yeah, just look up like they have like these Chinese made like fucking knockoff Tiffany
[00:26:29] So I keep the lights down low and I smoke in there and I have a home phone that I gossip
[00:26:37] I don't know if I'm going to put anybody on.
[00:26:49] Who are you gossiping with the types of people you gossiping with, you know?
[00:26:54] It's actually yes, it is an older gay man.
[00:27:05] Many of you are thinking that describes Adam perfectly.
[00:27:17] And then the cushy dreams gets me just right.
[00:27:21] And I'm ready to nicks over their smoke and the cushy dreams mean like Lucius.
[00:27:33] I don't want to put anybody in my glass.
[00:28:00] The only problem now with my friend, a friend of mine moved in with me is that he took the
[00:28:07] guy that I actually, I guess I could call Ben O'Brien.
[00:28:10] Ben O'Brien's still over there on LA time.
[00:28:18] Fucking smoke a joint and gossip with your gay old friends.
[00:28:26] Now a lot of you are going out there getting that fake Chinese Tiffany's lamp that Nick
[00:28:30] has and you're going to, and if you want to complete the thing, you got to get a gay
[00:28:33] old friend and you got to buy most importantly some cushy dreams.
[00:28:39] So go to cushy dreams.com K U S H Y dreams.com and you smoke a C B D because you can.
[00:28:49] Come town for 20% off your first order.
[00:28:52] 20% of your service or smoke your CBD because you can.
[00:28:58] One of the farthest marketing ultra premium premium.
[00:29:07] I like it a lot better when see right now we should have broads on.
[00:29:14] But I'm currently we've been here two days, not even right?
[00:29:24] It's kind of stuff I'm eating access is insane because we bought healthy quote unquote stuff
[00:29:30] and I just ate everything I ate so much.
[00:29:33] The only thing that was slightly bad is butter.
[00:29:39] That entire thing of Kerry Gold bread's gone bread's gone.
[00:29:43] It's like I was spreading butter on my shit.
[00:29:45] How I can be a glutton with like a head of lettuce.
[00:29:50] I was going to get a strawberry all going.
[00:29:54] It's weird because like animals don't get fat but occasionally they'll be a squirrel or
[00:29:57] like a fucking orangutan that's like just obese and it's like I guess I would be that
[00:30:04] I'd like to think that I'd be one of the normal animals.
[00:30:08] But there's just one of them that's like fucking like what are those?
[00:30:25] It's like nothing but like Korean raccoon accounts.
[00:30:34] Mine's mostly basketball highlights and girls with big breasts.
[00:30:37] You don't want to sing about doing it once we get the video set up.
[00:30:43] Instead of having our own YouTube channel.
[00:30:46] Let me know what you think about this idea because there's already people that are like
[00:30:50] Just identify like the top five accounts that already repost stuff.
[00:30:56] And then just give them the video to upload.
[00:31:00] In exchange for them like emailing view counts.
[00:31:09] So I think that seems like a little too much logistical work.
[00:31:28] I actually probably would not be a problem to write like a scraper that just pulls the
[00:31:32] Isn't that one of the most readily available pieces of information on YouTube?
[00:31:36] I just don't want to actually go to the website.
[00:31:39] But there are like, isn't there like back end that analytics that only the account on
[00:31:46] We can look at my YouTube channel later.
[00:31:48] I'm not saying about doing it that way.
[00:31:49] Because I like the idea of the brand being something that's just like distributed with
[00:31:56] Although then one of those guys started posting N words.
[00:32:03] But I like the idea of being like a wholesaler rather than like, you know, so people come
[00:32:08] and they're like, I want to buy my thing.
[00:32:10] And it's like, well, then you got to find it.
[00:32:12] You got to find an autistic guy that's staying up on the like making clips.
[00:32:19] Yeah, we have a website and then you click buy and it's like, there's nothing there.
[00:32:23] Because I don't want to come down to be a thing that you can just go get.
[00:32:25] I want it to be like, she he come town.
[00:32:31] If they buy, if we sell, okay, I like this idea.
[00:32:38] We have to sell dealership like rights, naming rights.
[00:32:45] I want to show to those guys who sell it for whatever they want.
[00:32:49] And then the dealers, you know, they had dealer options.
[00:32:51] Like, so they can like, people can get the podcast without them edited it out.
[00:33:03] And then you can do whatever you can monitor any way you want.
[00:33:10] You got to go to like a specific, come town dealership to get like your own option.
[00:33:14] I'll provide a supplementary file where I'm only doing it like different races.
[00:33:26] But then you would say to yourself, what if it's the regular one, but then he goes into
[00:33:30] Indian, but you have Indian, you have Indian, right as the regular.
[00:33:38] But then so it's the Indian version of the regular episode.
[00:33:43] But in the regular episode, it switches to Indian.
[00:33:46] Well, how well, how would I know that here's where I live?
[00:33:59] You find like if you look at color chart yellow plus fucking blue is green.
[00:34:05] So whatever the opposite of Brown is is what it was.
[00:34:09] So you take Brown, the other side is purple.
[00:34:13] Like a fucking Vietnamese woman's pussy.
[00:34:42] I think it's like with like a beats pill and the train.
[00:34:44] They're like, what is that coming from?
[00:35:01] I got a newbie and newbie and cubians come down.
[00:35:10] I'm just putting YouTube to do my show.
[00:35:15] Just fucking give the raw files to that guy.
[00:35:17] Well they can still do the clips if we just have the whole episodes.
[00:35:20] Well they can do whatever they want with it.
[00:35:22] They just get the raw files and then we take the metrics from like the aggregate.
[00:35:27] You pick the top five, ten people to distribute the thing or that could do whatever.
[00:35:33] I just don't want is when people like, you know, the less if we did our own channel or
[00:35:44] I mean, why even do the video if we're not going to do it our own channel?
[00:35:48] Because if you get the aggregate numbers, you can still sell ads based on those numbers.
[00:35:54] If you don't control, I think it's hard to sell ads on something you don't control.
[00:35:57] I mean, from whoever we talk to, what if I can do it?
[00:36:02] I think if you went through a company, we're like, hey, there's five guys.
[00:36:06] We don't know that run a YouTube channel that also they look it's like, well, how do
[00:36:11] they even know that the ads going to be that channels going to be there?
[00:36:20] I got blessed those guys, but I think it's a novel idea.
[00:36:26] It's all about finding something new and new way and new way to do business.
[00:36:39] He's like, what if we had a bank that was also an orphanage?
[00:36:43] You put the fucking little little kids to work.
[00:36:45] Put in their little making their little fingers and making rules of pennies.
[00:36:57] I arched his eyebrows in a way that says old style means molest them.
[00:37:01] I was thinking about that that ventrilo harassment video.
[00:37:05] Still one of the funniest collections of...
[00:37:11] That guy that would like hack ventrilo servers.
[00:37:16] Ventrilo was like a precursor to Discord basically.
[00:37:19] It was like a chat server that you could like if you play games online they didn't have
[00:37:29] And stop a five on a section with your puppet.
[00:37:31] There was some guy that went in the one with like a Duke Nukem sound board.
[00:37:36] I know exactly the one you're talking about.
[00:38:09] It is funny because that woman had no idea what she was getting into.
[00:38:13] Are you gonna stand here or are you gonna leave?
[00:38:34] There has to be somebody from the guilt or somebody that we know.
[00:38:39] I hope not because I don't think your mother is very happy about it.
[00:38:46] I want every person written name written down.
[00:39:01] I'm gonna rip your head off and shit down your neck.
[00:39:08] That woman has just never been told in her life she doesn't understand what's going
[00:39:15] People didn't know how to handle their shit online.
[00:39:17] And ironically those people won because now the internet is like if you come online with
[00:39:22] that attitude like they give you a TV show.
[00:39:29] So like one of the bravest, the most beautiful.
[00:39:40] One of the biggest facts we've ever seen.
[00:39:44] Everybody loves how much of a fucking loser this guy.
[00:40:06] Damn I love being out here in the fucking country.
[00:40:10] I wish there was, is there, there's a mountain nearby right?
[00:40:17] We should probably, you want to go like, Adam's probably not even gonna be like, I'm
[00:40:22] We should go get some bacon or something for breakfast.
[00:40:28] Take a little trip to the grocery store.
[00:40:30] I would also like some, this coffee's not bad, but I want some like, some better coffee.
[00:40:35] Nah, just like milk or something to put it.
[00:40:38] Because it's like I'm getting tired of drinking.
[00:40:40] Getting tired of drinking black coffee.
[00:41:05] I'm here to suck dick and chew bubble gum.
[00:41:10] All the bubble gum is actually more dick.
[00:41:14] And when I said bubble gum, I meant penis.
[00:41:16] I'm here to suck dick and eat ass and get fucked in my mouth.
[00:41:23] I'm here to get bent over and fucked until I'm out of room in my ass and then you've
[00:41:28] got to fuck my mouth and I drink all the comments, throw it up all over your dick to
[00:41:32] lube you up so you can fuck me in the ass again and eat bubble gum.
[00:41:47] I love my ridge wallet, but it might be time for, I'm, I kind of want to, I'm going to
[00:41:51] hit them up and get another getting you one.
[00:41:54] Yeah, just the other one I have is fine, but you're going to have it actually.
[00:42:06] I don't need what I was going to say, Nick is I don't need it because I already have
[00:42:10] It sucks because it's like, you know, you do these reasons.
[00:42:16] I will say that like instantly, because I did, I did like real ass podcast or whatever
[00:42:24] And this was all that was like the fidget spinner era of course before he became a professional
[00:42:35] Whatever you like is probably gay, Lewis.
[00:42:41] Dude, like well, because like, you know, like, I mean, they sent us them and then I just
[00:42:45] started because my wallet was fucked up.
[00:42:46] So my plan was to just use the ridge wallet until you bought it until I went back and
[00:42:55] And, and it's been, it's not, I will say the regular wallets are fucking impractical.
[00:43:02] You just need something for a couple of cards and IDs.
[00:43:05] You mean you first see the ridge wallet.
[00:43:06] You're like, well, where am I going to put all my shit?
[00:43:09] Like I have, I have six years worth of receipts.
[00:43:15] Like all this bullshit that you don't fucking need.
[00:43:17] And then the ridge wallet makes you pare down your stuff to.
[00:43:20] So my, there's like a whole subreddit called like daily carry.
[00:43:24] People like check out my loadout or whatever and they'll have like, they always put their
[00:43:29] shit out on like, you know, there's like, there's like, kind of soft rubber grids that
[00:43:39] Well, they act like it's a fucking drug bust.
[00:43:42] When they just have like, yeah, they have all their shit laid out to go like work in a
[00:43:48] And the best is like half of them are have guns also.
[00:43:51] It's like a gun or ridge wallet or campus.
[00:44:02] Well, I don't want to see, see, I don't like your ritual because I have the one that's
[00:44:06] I like the, I just like carrying one thing.
[00:44:10] I love the name of fucking love the naked phone.
[00:44:13] See, I like the, I like the ritual phone case.
[00:44:16] I don't like the naked phone because I'll fuck it up.
[00:44:19] I finally, I've never broken a phone ever.
[00:44:22] And the, well, I had the iPhone 10 and I finally broke it.
[00:44:25] But I was like, I would throw that thing across the room all the time.
[00:44:30] You know, I come home and I take off that.
[00:44:31] I cut off all my clothes with a pair of scissors.
[00:44:36] I learned how to undress myself, do anything in life.
[00:44:44] You come home, you cut off all your clothes.
[00:44:48] You, and you throw the phone against the wall, which is what you do every day.
[00:44:54] But the, which more importantly is that what you would, it doesn't matter how hard you
[00:44:58] throw it, the Ridge wall will never break.
[00:45:06] It's, it's very, why the fuck can I ever find this fucking copy?
[00:45:21] Um, well, you know, I have them all in like a Google drive.
[00:45:26] Like I have all the copy in a folder on Google drive.
[00:45:30] When I open Google drive on my phone, it's like, oh, here's a bunch of bullshit you don't
[00:45:35] You would do reasons, but then it's like so recent and it's, it's, cause I also, I use
[00:45:42] So it's all of my like accounting shit.
[00:45:44] It's fucking like, yeah, you know, line one, a hundred thousand extra small condoms.
[00:45:54] Oh, I have to go to star subscription to gay star.
[00:46:00] And then for 100,000 dollars and here either.
[00:46:09] So you go to Google drive, you go to start cause I guess the app one has starred and then
[00:46:13] the fucking desktop one expenditure for a tiny dress for a little woman.
[00:46:25] It's a little woman size cause you like being exposed mostly.
[00:46:45] What the fuck is like the shortcuts app on iOS?
[00:46:48] Like I love every like, every like couple iterations of whatever software they'll like
[00:46:54] The new feature that some dickhead like Gil from the Simpsons, I had Apple was probably
[00:46:59] like, this is going to be it's going to change everything.
[00:47:02] This is going to be the thing that everybody wants to use.
[00:47:05] Look, all you have to do is, is you learn how to create iOS specific macros.
[00:47:13] It's just your fucking about your phone again.
[00:47:18] It's just they're grouped in the same exact little box as you already fucking group them
[00:47:26] Let me do a sort of cut for me to look at a pussy.
[00:47:35] Now that's a shortcut I can get behind.
[00:47:43] How about you fucking cut to the Ridge Wallet ad copy very shortly?
[00:47:50] It's live read copy and it's blue chew because you know, man's game.
[00:48:18] Why don't you talk about your experience with Ridge Wallet?
[00:48:28] You were sleeping extra long because you were dreaming of the Ridge Wallet, weren't you?
[00:48:32] Yeah, I was having great dreams about the Ridge Wallet.
[00:48:38] Damn, I just want to get a picture of you looking nice, dude.
[00:48:51] We played guitar and saw him almost kill me.
[00:49:03] We've been looking for the Ridge Wallet copy for like four minutes.
[00:49:27] You're giving you one whole episode off, dude.
[00:49:31] It holds up to 12 cards plus room for cash.
[00:49:38] I'm going to ask them to give me that burnt titanium one.
[00:49:42] I have the carbon fiber one now, which makes me feel like a little haunted.
[00:49:48] I put my hand on my hip and I look over my shoulder and I have the Ridge Wallet hooked
[00:49:57] I go into these country bars and I'm like, did anyone order a haunted?
[00:50:01] And people are like, we don't know whether to beat you up because you're regular gay
[00:50:11] Whatever you're doing bothers me so viscerally that I'm short circuiting.
[00:50:15] I'm having a meltdown because you're doing a gay stance.
[00:50:20] I do not understand what the Honda thing is.
[00:50:26] You are so deeply embarrassing as a human being that it is making me want to kill my own unborn son.
[00:50:51] I think he's talking about a carbon fiber wallet and sort of looks like a Honda I guess.
[00:50:58] Well, you know how the risers over the carbon fiber hood on their car is a car modification,
[00:51:06] Even Japanese cars, I mean carbon fiber on anything.
[00:51:11] It's just like a way to reduce the weight.
[00:51:17] So anyway, I think that's what he's doing, but I don't know why.
[00:51:22] And then he's pretending he's got his ass stuck out like a homosexual would.
[00:51:28] It's made with RFID blocking technology that protects you from digital pickpocketers.
[00:51:34] That's the thing that's been happening a lot more worked.
[00:51:38] I get digital pickpocketed constantly left and right.
[00:51:46] Yeah, every time your girlfriend's like, why the hell did somebody order gay porn on my computer?
[00:51:52] It's like I've been digital pickpocketed.
[00:51:54] These gestures are a little British child robot.
[00:52:05] What's that? Look quick there, Governor, over there.
[00:52:08] Quick, get his pockets, check for microchips in circuitry.
[00:52:16] Use promo code COMTOWN for 10% off your order.
[00:52:21] And you want to do it right the fuck now.
[00:52:25] Go to ridewallit.com slash COMTOWN and use code COMTOWN.
[00:52:39] Something like weird vibe on the show now.
[00:52:52] We'll try to figure out what changed, but we were really rolling there.
[00:52:57] I don't know if you were going to be able to explore something like the digital pit pocket.
[00:53:05] And the idea of taking it, doing a joke with that.
[00:53:07] And just kind of running with it fully.
[00:53:09] Rather than, yeah, someone just saying, oh, yeah, I got digital pit pocket.
[00:53:20] You're doing like a punitive thing where you could have woken me up, but this is like an extension of a greater thing where you've been mad at it.
[00:53:34] But you wake up and then it's like, hey, guess what?
[00:53:39] We already know it wouldn't have been nice.
[00:53:41] And then we could go get breakfast and then we could do another one.
[00:53:44] I wake up and have it in the breakfast.
[00:53:46] I want just for us that we don't release and it's just for us.
[00:53:53] Just for us, we'll keep it in a little little ridge wall frame.
[00:53:56] It's just the three of us and we're not.
[00:54:03] You can put it on your man, hang it up on the fridge.
[00:54:06] It'll be like one of those cards, a reading card, and you open it and it plays the full episode.
[00:54:11] Listen, I went to Radio Shack and I made a fake version of the mixer with even more buttons.
[00:54:15] You can take home with you and you can press all the buttons.
[00:54:23] It's got a little steering wheel on there.
[00:54:27] Why are you on some of our sister price mixer?
[00:54:31] My first studio, Baby's first thing to fuck up.
[00:54:38] I used to fucking do little radio shows.
[00:54:47] I know that Savros was kind of like one of the collaborators before the Holocaust,
[00:54:52] but you were definitely one of the Gestapo's.
[00:54:56] No, honestly, I was like, let's just say...
[00:55:00] I was just saying, maybe if you wanted to go down remotely close to the Holocaust.
[00:55:04] Maybe if you wanted to see the Nazis came in and forcibly gave the Jews a day off work.
[00:55:09] It wasn't a day off work without affecting their income in the slide.
[00:55:13] We're not allowed to Jews to sleep in and get an extra paycheck.
[00:55:18] If you said we have work at 10, I would have been up.
[00:55:32] I'm waking up, I'm thinking about new business model, dealership ideas.
[00:55:36] What are you making a dealership like that?
[00:55:44] Adam, don't spit in our face when we do something.
[00:55:55] Honestly, if I had woken up and you guys had done the show, you know, happy I'd be.
[00:56:00] I would have been like, this is the best day of my life.
[00:56:14] Okay, now you're bringing up Jews because they don't have questions.
[00:56:20] They're never trying to meet Santa Claus.
[00:56:22] You know that's one of the biggest part of this in my life.
[00:56:27] If you had everyone who was goddamn waking up early for presents.
[00:56:31] The goaim have waking up early built into them because they're always trying to meet Santa.
[00:56:38] This man that brings good fortune overnight.
[00:56:42] You remember why the financial markets don't open until 9am?
[00:56:52] Because people train on the west coast.
[00:56:54] Because guess which kind of sleepy group.
[00:57:03] Because stock rubbers on the west coast have to start at 6.30.
[00:57:06] Once again, we're playing around a real answer with joking.
[00:57:27] It's like a sleepy jusion in the market.
[00:57:32] I just pulled out of my ass to justify doing a podcast.
[00:57:37] The sleepy jus is one of the oldest anti-submaxxial either.
[00:58:04] But basically, Adam, this was kind of like Christmas where you wake up.
[00:58:14] That pussy's on Amazon like two years ago.
[00:58:18] You're fucking, you, ugh, waking up, looking at the markets,
[00:58:23] demanding everyone stole things from it.
[00:58:30] It was a rough Friday, but yeah, there's a vaccine announcement.
[00:58:40] That's why I'm counting on Greek town, Baltimore, Maryland.
[00:58:48] I'm gonna just crowdsource opinions on all of our ideas.
[00:58:52] And by that, I'm only if you know what you're talking about.
[00:58:58] Adam, when we were discussing, yeah, what's that, the bus?
[00:59:02] I've been here the whole time, except for this morning when I was sleeping.
[00:59:06] Because I drank too many mango white claws last night.
[00:59:11] You buy an empty lot in Brooklyn, and then you park the bus on it, you retrofit the bus
[00:59:19] And we can go on the road, take the bus, but also just use it as any in town studio.
[00:59:25] And now you're saying that and our competitors are gonna beat us to it.
[00:59:29] Lewis is gonna listen to this, and he's gonna get...
[00:59:33] Lewis's move is always moving the direction of pretend radio station.
[00:59:39] You know, he wants to make a serious XM.
[00:59:44] Yeah, but where's the country getting pushed?
[01:00:07] I mean, it's like a marginal difference in terms of expenses.
[01:00:13] It's a much nicer alternative to flying.
[01:00:21] I don't know, because I think you have to hire a driver.
[01:00:25] It's also to be the dealer and to get the groupies.
[01:00:28] If you retrofit, you need to see the L if you're driving something that has the capacity to carry more than 16 people.
[01:00:38] If we retrofit it, it's just a studio and it's basically like a motorhome, then you might not need the CDL.
[01:00:44] Well, that's why I'm also saying we should get a van, because that's easier to drive.
[01:00:50] Yeah, but if we have a van, I'm just saying, we're not going to sleep in the motherfucker.
[01:01:00] Yeah, I want to get like in a con a lot.
[01:01:06] I mean, at the very least, you have to get a sprinter.
[01:01:09] Or like a little school bus in retrofit to school.
[01:01:13] And then the studio is just sideways in the thing.
[01:01:19] No, you do one like trust me, there's a way to build it out.
[01:01:27] With the equipment run off the battery?
[01:01:28] Well, you got like a width of like at the very least internally, like seven, eight feet.
[01:01:37] It's there's like a generator on the bus.
[01:01:40] We have to, but we have to run the bus every time.
[01:01:47] There's probably a way to hook like, you know, I don't know, fucking electricity up to the
[01:01:51] bus because the bus has shit that, you know, you would just set all that up.
[01:01:59] I'm asking the questions we need to interest.
[01:02:00] I mean, we don't have to get alone anyways to do all this shit.
[01:02:03] So it's like I figure roll that into the cost is getting like the electricity hooked up
[01:02:08] Also like some kind of like hardwired data connection when it's just parked there.
[01:02:14] Now it's starting to seem like there's a lot of parts.
[01:02:16] And we can sleep in Walmart parking lots because those are open 24 hours a day.
[01:02:20] Maybe we just buy a van and drive around in it.
[01:02:23] It's a problem is that there's an idea and the idea is ambitious.
[01:02:28] And you want to dial it back so far that it just becomes a bad idea.
[01:02:43] Well, then maybe that's what we should do.
[01:02:44] At some point having a van still sounds like it sucks.
[01:02:52] And we'd stop off at YMC as take showers.
[01:03:03] So then it would that would run off of a gray water.
[01:03:09] It's what in our views and campers with a it's like water you can't drink but you
[01:03:13] get a shower with what you shit inside of in a mega bus.
[01:03:26] I want to make sure people go buy my calendars.
[01:03:31] These are out now by the time this comes out.
[01:03:32] You guys will have the Stobby.biz 2021 Stobby baby calendars out there.
[01:03:40] If you get it right now, you'll probably get it before Christmas or so.
[01:03:43] I don't know what day this coming up or whatever.
[01:03:52] We got your stocking stuffers figured out folks calendars and shirts.
[01:03:56] We're closing in on the final the final couple of days here to because this comes out December
[01:04:08] You'll be able to have it for the holiday.