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Ep. 238 - 300

Cum Town | Regular | 12/16/2020

[00:00:00] this is really going to be a test
[00:00:03] to see if we can do it
[00:00:06] to see if we can make it
[00:00:08] into
[00:00:09] trump to uncharted territory the next dimension trump brought up hitting a
[00:00:14] ramp
[00:00:15] oh yeah
[00:00:16] oh yeah
[00:00:20] in what context
[00:00:21] he brought it up this week with advisors apparently
[00:00:25] we are headed to the final frontier that's a that would be such a ball
[00:00:28] we don't trump to start around war with iran no yeah like right before the
[00:00:33] transition it's by the way i do what this
[00:00:35] that's it now you get to do it
[00:00:38] yeah gay
[00:00:41] that would actually be kind of funny but i hope it doesn't happen
[00:00:45] you know from my iranian brothers and sisters out there i got a ton of
[00:00:48] Persian uh you know people in my corner
[00:00:52] listen what happened during three hundred
[00:00:54] you versus us persians versus greeks that's water under the bridge
[00:00:58] uh-huh we want i want you to be safe we should watch three hundred
[00:01:02] dude
[00:01:04] i would like to know eventually it's a point put it on the list i only saw it in the
[00:01:08] theaters once i saw it high as fucking the
[00:01:11] theaters i was yeah one of my first high i was like 16 when it came out i think
[00:01:15] something right and uh i got fucking stunned out of my
[00:01:18] fucking gourd my yeah yeah my grandma fucking saw me she was like what's
[00:01:22] what's wrong i was like i'm with your grandma asleep no no
[00:01:26] she saw me leave the house and she's like are you okay
[00:01:29] i was like i'm sleepy yeah yeah in high school my friend told his dad that he
[00:01:34] was crying that's awesome and then uh i was over at the house it was
[00:01:38] dad's like let me smell and then he ran away from home and i was just
[00:01:42] stuck at his parents are you serious we're both stoned
[00:01:46] we get home his dad's like why are your eyes like that he's like i was
[00:01:49] crying wait and he left and then he was like ran away and got in his car and
[00:01:54] i was like stuck at his house what did you and then i called him i was like dude
[00:01:58] i'm still at your house you're like oh fuck
[00:02:03] that rocks dude yeah i just talked to him he's he's about to have a second child
[00:02:09] oh yeah is it baby hot uh can you see if his cock is big on the
[00:02:13] on the echo location i haven't asked on the uh echo fuck what's that called
[00:02:19] the um ultrasound ultrasound yeah the echo location yeah
[00:02:26] that's on the check for your watch the other show it's probably a similar
[00:02:30] technology yeah they put dolphins up for real hold on it's probably similar
[00:02:34] it's an ultrasound ultrasound and echo location is bouncing sound beams off
[00:02:38] that shit why would it be sound if it is that what an ultrasound is it's the
[00:02:44] sound of a what the fuck why the fuck wouldn't it
[00:02:46] why would i never think of that kind of stuff why when they put sound in the
[00:02:50] title of the one that's female problems dude that's true
[00:02:53] that doesn't sound like a meat problem i guess you know yeah you're technically
[00:02:56] right it is a kind of form of echo thank you
[00:02:59] thank you right wouldn't think i think it sounds right thanks motherfuckers
[00:03:04] no i'm just saying i don't know what it is though
[00:03:06] but it sounds right i am right now yeah i mean you don't know what it is that's
[00:03:11] right you're using sound to to generate um i just
[00:03:15] remember you bounce off you know the baby i spent
[00:03:17] probably like three days learning how to draw people with down syndrome when i
[00:03:21] made that um beer shirt uh bastard ale and then i ended
[00:03:26] up not even going with like a guy with down syndrome is the final design
[00:03:29] oh you didn't i remember the i remember the tests no it's that you sent over
[00:03:33] yeah it's i ended up being sloth from the goonies kind of okay he sort of
[00:03:38] retarded yeah that's that's retarded sloth is definitely like
[00:03:43] wildly mentally disabled no actually he's really smart
[00:03:46] actually he's one of the smartest real yeah
[00:03:51] how old is sloth is 43 the character yeah i mean the character
[00:03:57] supposed to be in his early 60s no i don't know i've no i've
[00:04:01] fucking young but you know not that young maybe two
[00:04:04] two old to be hanging out with all them kids that's the thing this has sloth
[00:04:08] ever fucked do they get him a whore to
[00:04:11] calm his urges yeah you'd think a guy like that would really want to fuck yeah
[00:04:16] because he's all armed people with extra chromosomes
[00:04:18] extra males like they're more aggressive and shit that's people with extra um
[00:04:24] no i think i'm right just to have extra an extra set of testicles
[00:04:29] that this is to be retarded yes that's not no
[00:04:33] all retarded people have extra bull that's why they're mad yeah
[00:04:36] because it's so you know two two nuts get hurt it hurts a lot
[00:04:40] imagine getting hit in four nuts you know imagine you're nuts hurting twice as
[00:04:44] bad that'll be all how horrible that would be i would be
[00:04:47] fucking pissed off too is that why Nick um yeah i'm now i'm just trying to
[00:04:52] sketch retarded people you're just trying while i'm trying to sketch
[00:04:55] retarded how often how many times a week do you
[00:04:57] hit your nuts or a month well say we'll put it on a month
[00:05:02] to hurt your nuts i would say two in a month two in a month
[00:05:06] um not often for me you know i'm Adam just hit me
[00:05:09] nuts today i hit you in the nuts yeah right on the nuts when why would i do
[00:05:15] right on the fucking nuts at breakfast i think
[00:05:18] why would i do that you made me an egg i think you were joking
[00:05:21] yeah but you went too far i witnessed it i watched it what did i do
[00:05:25] no wasn't breck what you hit me in the cock and balls
[00:05:30] you hit me right on the ball right on the ball
[00:05:33] like in the fucking sweet spot bro i'm sorry about that
[00:05:37] this guy never has any accountability that's what he doesn't remember his
[00:05:42] transgressions yeah i'm a i'm a white guy dude
[00:05:45] you know i don't have any accountability it's true
[00:05:48] and um and you forgot we forgot who rolled when
[00:05:51] remember that that was not my last go that was your fault we just had a heated
[00:05:56] game with katana might be my next being so quiet right now
[00:05:59] no i'm i'm i'm i'm trying to put myself in you know we're coming on hot off that
[00:06:04] error clap and right probably and i'm not
[00:06:07] pinnacle i'm worried that i'm not going to be able to repeat that
[00:06:10] so what i'm doing is i'm putting myself this is a trick
[00:06:14] a lot of you can use okay as you start doing a different kind of
[00:06:18] creative work right so i'll just draw kind of like shapes or eyes or
[00:06:23] loops yeah or pussy and um and what that does is
[00:06:27] draw pussy it runs off the clock so i don't have to uh
[00:06:32] say as much stuff yeah yeah that's fine no but what it does is it puts you in
[00:06:36] you kind of have to then you have to like work to get back into
[00:06:39] sort of a riffing mindset i guess interesting and boy you get you have to
[00:06:44] get frustrated with trying to draw retarded people
[00:06:47] and you just you keep working and working and working
[00:06:51] and no matter what you never really get any better
[00:06:53] no you get a little better and god did it so easily
[00:06:57] he made the heavens and the earth yeah
[00:07:00] he met on the eighth day and on the
[00:07:05] spaghetti day god forgot how to count
[00:07:09] that's when that's when they say that the christian people will say that
[00:07:13] they're like well you know his my son was touched by god and that's why he is
[00:07:18] the way he is oh right oh about retarded you guys are
[00:07:21] so high dude i'm not yeah i'm high yeah i guess we drove over the border in
[00:07:25] massachusetts where they have we got some fucking
[00:07:28] we went to we got some loud pack over and i didn't
[00:07:32] i was crying i could drive dude i was crying because you're sinking about
[00:07:36] three hundred i told you guys about the goddamn and i was in college
[00:07:42] with that i'm leaving i just passed and he was gay right
[00:07:46] yeah my friend did he make did he make like ledges
[00:07:49] trash all that's funny dude laughing with gay people
[00:07:52] i just think it's a funny poster to have a surprise to you
[00:07:55] that's funny no he was uh he was like do you that's funny he was like
[00:08:00] he was like a misogynistic bro but he had only a night as poster in this room
[00:08:05] and because he's gay it's funny yeah that's half of the show
[00:08:10] that's no no certainly not you're a fucked up guy for that one
[00:08:16] so this is first of all this is a podcast that's about music
[00:08:20] and socialism
[00:08:25] we're talking about tool yeah and we're talking about motherfucking uh
[00:08:29] carl moron uh we yeah a lot of people have been waiting for a
[00:08:32] i know the penis fits a review of inside inside my own 10 000 days
[00:08:40] i haven't heard that one all i've heard is the song about making the pieces fit
[00:08:44] that's yeah i know the penis fits inside of my
[00:08:50] budget by tool podcast but my my my my my my my my my my
[00:08:55] dick is small but my oh yeah i know my dick is small because i measure
[00:09:04] because i just got a ruler and i'm a certified dick
[00:09:12] what small is it how are you doing my name is
[00:09:17] man of james keenly i'm one of um the guitarist
[00:09:21] to wait no i'm not looking for you so shit
[00:09:26] i'm just going no uh well yes actually
[00:09:30] the bass from the oh he's back it's uh
[00:09:34] loose back uh right now it appears that we're looking at
[00:09:38] eric claptor we're a tool t-shirt no it's manor james need
[00:09:43] manor james keenly whatever the fuck his name is
[00:09:47] from the band who what was your favorite part of writing the
[00:09:51] people with the pieces fit i guess adam's gone already i'm going to help
[00:09:54] already make it nine minutes nine minutes adam nine minutes into the
[00:09:57] podcast before he the fuck you do again you're jul
[00:10:00] oh now he's coming back to say something hilarious
[00:10:03] there we go ahead yeah what he's saying
[00:10:07] yeah when did you come up to me that song the pieces
[00:10:09] fit
[00:10:12] that's a good question yeah i just thought about it in the other room
[00:10:16] it's me manor made of james keenly is that him
[00:10:20] yeah no i shut the fuck up that's what that guy looks like that's what he
[00:10:24] looks like that's a different tool that's when was an alice cooper he's from
[00:10:27] ohio he's from columbus it all comes back together
[00:10:31] you know alice cooper are you fucking serious
[00:10:33] alice cooper is a scratch golfer no he's not he's like a plus
[00:10:37] five-hand really he's like insanely good at golf
[00:10:41] who is alice cooper oh and picture when you see i saw him in
[00:10:45] these village one huh it was really good did he look like an old
[00:10:48] jewish woman he was in he was in like a suburban with a much of like
[00:10:52] outward handlers around him he looks like a lady now
[00:10:55] do you know it's weird because his name is alice cooper
[00:10:58] yeah it's like he was trying to tell us something
[00:11:02] yeah the original that's the one that's a different that's a way to become a
[00:11:05] lady without being trans yeah be an old rock star
[00:11:09] named alice and then eventually he's basically trans even
[00:11:13] tyler looks like a translator yeah
[00:11:20] fits
[00:11:22] because
[00:11:24] um
[00:11:28] what are some other tools
[00:11:31] i don't really they don't really have that many hits i'm sorry to say that
[00:11:34] yeah they don't they're actually no one knows who to
[00:11:38] tool is i know they have a big following and they're big band uh
[00:11:41] good afternoon i'm shifting shell shock from the band the
[00:11:44] the offsway oh really what's going on shift when
[00:11:48] i wrote the album x-nay on the ombre i was thinking about
[00:11:54] both pig Latin and spanish and other very similar languages yeah
[00:11:58] if you notice yeah what's you listen to both and it sounds like
[00:12:02] idiotic
[00:12:03] yeah
[00:12:06] both of them just sound like the absolute ramblings of rongholoid
[00:12:10] some of a mongoloid race and that's where i came up with the name x-nay on the
[00:12:14] ombre that's which is a mixture of i've always been
[00:12:17] obsessed with languages right you're linguist in your spare time
[00:12:20] right it's me the shift to your shell shock whoever who's the head guy the
[00:12:25] offspring
[00:12:26] shift to shell shock was uh my butterfly of course
[00:12:31] that's i know shift to shell shock is not from the office
[00:12:34] oh i thought you thought i was shift to shell shock i thought it was to be fair
[00:12:39] i don't know their names assume me for not knowing the fucking name of the
[00:12:42] guy from all of us i never learned that grian holland
[00:12:46] oh yeah we just got got fucking little dutch shoes on brian deckster
[00:12:50] what is he wearing fucking wooden shoes and putting chocolate up his ass
[00:12:53] when a windmill being gay yeah uh we started the band because uh you know
[00:13:00] we were all uh living in holland and we were gay
[00:13:04] that's why he changed his name
[00:13:07] you know there's a bunch of windmills
[00:13:10] the windmills are coming in and out of our ass you know the only job at the time
[00:13:14] was either kookoo clock manufacturer or kookoo clock repairman right
[00:13:19] those are the only jobs in denmark that's it yeah
[00:13:21] but denmark which is the other name for holland yeah
[00:13:25] they are too similar one although holland has the awesome orange
[00:13:30] line yeah they're like uh it's called holland but also the netherlands and
[00:13:34] but dutch and it's like actually you can pick one yeah that's the three
[00:13:37] shivers three things actually we're bringing the knots
[00:13:40] use back yeah but that's the not that is the
[00:13:47] nazi's music it would be cool if if pennsylvania invaded europe
[00:13:51] mm-hmm just an independent state yes
[00:13:54] and got pitch you got finally the pitch burger and filial line they can come
[00:13:58] together for the first time to fuck up that's really the whole
[00:14:02] america has been holding them back by keeping the pencil by
[00:14:06] pittsburgh and uh you must feel you guys from you must unite united yeah then
[00:14:11] they can unite all of pen pencil tucky
[00:14:15] yeah which is all where the fucking rednecks are over there
[00:14:18] how about manor and slames penis uh-huh and he's like he's slames
[00:14:23] slames yeah because he's british oh he's lame
[00:14:27] he's just like oh it's like i'm having a rather charming slice
[00:14:32] slames but i'm just saying respond
[00:14:35] it's lame
[00:14:38] then it's claims bond was lame no i don't fuck that's james bond
[00:14:43] me i'm just uh i'm a spy but my thing is um
[00:14:47] fingering i kiss a lot i do a lot of i love making out really
[00:14:53] good play and and smothering myself in the breast
[00:14:58] and being smothered by them that's kind of nice but penetration is not for me
[00:15:02] that's where you that's where you lose me slames
[00:15:05] because i would get smothered by a fat couple titties
[00:15:08] i'm on board with you my friend but you got to also penetrate afterwards
[00:15:14] what is it why don't you penetrate james slames
[00:15:17] uh we're penetrating this finger i guess that's true because i don't want to get
[00:15:21] a bunch of uh dried pussy juice on my tuxedo
[00:15:26] i don't take my shirt off when i thought this is why you have body issues
[00:15:30] yes oh james bond is the one that's confident
[00:15:34] he's going to the year yeah i'm very
[00:15:37] slames though i guess i'm good at code breaking
[00:15:40] oh okay so you're basically a programmer i'm a programmer but i have a license
[00:15:45] to kill wow have you used it my thing is i'm not you know i'm not clever so
[00:15:50] it's a bad guy i just shoot him in the face
[00:15:52] jitter of the face i go find him and i kill him i just kill him and i do programming
[00:15:57] he's like ah slames so good just boom
[00:16:03] right there just blast us yeah i paint the wall with his brain walk out
[00:16:07] we have time for tea and finger finger popping
[00:16:10] by high have high fingering it
[00:16:15] and you hear that big bend you know they used to keep that clock in the
[00:16:20] queen's poster really yeah when the tower of london they think it was a
[00:16:26] torture facility but really as you know britains
[00:16:29] we Brits invented being gay that's true well hold on a second
[00:16:35] you perfected it that's really self-eventing and eventually we ran out of
[00:16:39] things to do fuckwise so we had to create a b d sm tower
[00:16:44] uh-huh and because back then even you want to sell educational tickets and
[00:16:48] packages so you have to tell people it was for torture but
[00:16:51] that was all just to make people come oh that's awesome
[00:16:54] well i was the first like leather place it was like that um that one
[00:16:59] with the tower in san francisco what the fuck was the point of the inquisition
[00:17:03] it was just like say god rules basically no they just took
[00:17:07] say say say even peninsula back from the morse
[00:17:11] and it was run by arabs and muslims oh so they so they drum up public support so
[00:17:16] then they they use the church to murder muslims and jus
[00:17:20] smart yeah i think that's i think that's right i think that
[00:17:25] what happened was the church got in trouble with some banks
[00:17:28] and uh they could make that's where that's that did happen in england we
[00:17:32] talked about it norm in the jewish or whatever the norm in the jewish
[00:17:37] they got it uh king's owed like a billion dollars too
[00:17:41] it's funny to think that they could rack up millions back then i love the way
[00:17:45] hoteps use language and try to like work their way back linguistically
[00:17:50] do that whole thing it's like that's why you're jewish
[00:17:53] i love it because you're not you're like oh yeah that makes a sense
[00:17:57] modern england yeah that's like the eddie griffin thing
[00:18:03] you you told oh yeah which thing church people do that too
[00:18:09] which thing specifically said where they take the words and then they
[00:18:13] the break apart and use fake etymology so i don't remember it now
[00:18:18] but i remember what was the eddie driffin thing
[00:18:20] yeah that's what they call it adamology because a jewish man came through
[00:18:25] decided what all the words are gonna fucking be
[00:18:28] right right that's why they call it television because you call it adamology
[00:18:33] because it tells he's adamizing the language he is adamizing trying to take it
[00:18:37] away from the original people it's adam
[00:18:25] it's adamology because it tells he's adamizing the language he is adamizing
[00:18:36] trying to take it away from the original people
[00:18:39] it's adamology the first jews got from north philly
[00:18:43] black ashram north philly original jews that's right
[00:18:49] it's always i mean philly i get but it was surprising to meet boston black
[00:18:53] people yeah that's always weird because when they
[00:18:56] sound like they sound like yeah they sound like guys from like they sound
[00:18:59] like laurins fishburn and mystic river
[00:19:02] that's him rolling up in that crime scene in the first part of the movie
[00:19:06] yeah we got a fucking girl is dead down into
[00:19:11] that sounds tight yeah is that a good movie uh no
[00:19:14] but it's i i i when i worked from home i had like
[00:19:17] fucking nine dvd said i would just like watch over and over
[00:19:21] mr gribbers one of them i would i had one day where i watched mr gribber
[00:19:25] four times in a row because that's how i measured my shift
[00:19:29] uh-huh i was like all right i got three more viewings in mr
[00:19:33] is it about kids getting raped it's about um well yes i sound that
[00:19:38] mystical yeah i mean it is it's well it's mr cow river
[00:19:42] mr cow the rapper watch yourself fire like kaya yeah
[00:19:47] don't tell your parents i'm the less than you keep it
[00:19:50] easy watch stage i'm about to fuck you right now
[00:19:56] before um he also didn't he rape his maid or something
[00:20:00] you're right mr cow mr cow i don't know she was like oh mr
[00:20:04] Sheffield no no i think he caught her
[00:20:08] stealing and then he was like all right well you got sucked my
[00:20:11] dude did that for justice yeah and then he went to jail
[00:20:14] that's which is like you were up you caught her she goes to jail
[00:20:18] she raped herself she shouldn't be stealing she raped herself
[00:20:23] she raped herself was that a video that guy that tried to defend
[00:20:26] themselves by singing in court oh yeah
[00:20:30] apology oh no this 75 is a prayer
[00:20:37] through this life that i chose and he's like talking with
[00:20:40] he's doing like rap terms this the fucking Hail Mary's
[00:20:44] he's like tells his lore he's gonna he's gonna address the court before
[00:20:48] sentencing i mean if that worked that would have been awesome yeah
[00:20:52] and then he's there's yeah for this life that chose
[00:20:58] i mean even if you're a moron like i mean if you're the dumbest person in the
[00:21:02] world yeah what are you think how did you
[00:21:06] such the thought process on the guy maybe you thought it was so fun i
[00:21:14] would look i don't know it's even i wish when you when he was like it
[00:21:16] measures like murder or something something
[00:21:18] some wild yeah like what was it for yeah i was a it was a double homicide
[00:21:24] yeah oh no he probably just robbed something i would
[00:21:27] guess but singing because he was in this life that i chose
[00:21:32] yeah that's my favorite part that radio is fucking rules
[00:21:37] moving off the street i want to see what the fucking uh
[00:21:39] it's a goddamn desserts and brian earl tailors we don't have any desserts
[00:21:44] you got plenty of fruit which is a good heat
[00:21:46] okay yeah i know i've been eating fruit all day i know but it's gay
[00:21:51] it is i was i want a pie wow i want a piece of it can we make a pie
[00:21:55] Italian cheesecake i'll tell you what we wrapped this up i'll drive us
[00:21:58] we'll do a little late night 7-11 okay oh yeah that's sure 7-11
[00:22:03] his pie gas they will go to the gas station we could probably whip some
[00:22:06] up get a big old bag of beef jerky i'm pretty bliss right now i'm
[00:22:10] making you guys a pie no more we got apples we got apples and crust
[00:22:14] apples but no well i'll go get we got butter
[00:22:18] we can go to 7-11 i'm sure they have flour
[00:22:20] uh-huh i'll make us a pie we can get a pie if we go to 7-11
[00:22:24] thanks i'm gonna be taught i'm gonna be sleeping i'm gonna be
[00:22:27] free to worst pie i know it's gonna suck this
[00:22:30] i have ice cream would be pretty nice i was i was i was
[00:22:34] i was like i followed yeah i followed the recipe from your friend's youtube
[00:22:37] account it's the pie from the help
[00:22:41] i made you guys a vibe in the resume it's a famous you remember you
[00:22:45] remember you had your pie from american pie it's
[00:22:47] yeah i had ses when she shitting the pot she shits in the
[00:22:50] really that's awesome i was just guessing which i had never seen the help and i
[00:22:55] was laughing the other day imagining that that's the first scene in the
[00:22:58] movie that it just opens with her shading in a pie
[00:23:02] so why did she share he had a serving into a bunch of white
[00:23:06] deals and then you're very very supposed to be like
[00:23:09] so who is this character what's what's going on in her life
[00:23:13] she does it she does it because of some racist stuff i'm guessing
[00:23:17] um yeah
[00:23:21] everything for this live that i chose just skip the fucking ad and let me
[00:23:25] watch the singing skip the ad you fucking piece of shit
[00:23:28] you don't pay for you don't put him on book who pays for you
[00:23:31] you out of your fucking mind i pay for youtube you're you're crazy
[00:23:34] paying for i'd listen to like most of the music
[00:23:37] Spotify on youtube why do you use the youtube because they have a lot of
[00:23:41] stuff dude it's hard to enjoy that i don't know
[00:23:45] experience they have everything youtube has everything
[00:23:50] here i know i'm sorry for the things i've done
[00:23:56] it's beautiful and i try and be stronger
[00:24:01] in this life i chose but i want you to know
[00:24:06] that
[00:24:16] oh shit i've never heard the second word i've only heard like 10 second clip
[00:24:21] to the victim
[00:24:26] this is victim this is gonna usher in
[00:24:27] ushers
[00:24:38] there wow dude what happened we know it yeah he was
[00:24:41] uh mr for like unlawful imprisonment and carrying a concealed
[00:24:45] letter jesus kraig you kidding i have done a gum
[00:24:48] point
[00:24:51] yeah
[00:24:58] you're singing while doing crime for this life and i'll try to be stronger for
[00:25:04] this life i've chose this doesn't make it is awesome
[00:25:07] makes it sound like he's gonna be better at crimes yeah
[00:25:09] yeah respect i wish i you could either be like the
[00:25:14] fuck it just absolutely dumb as shit or smart
[00:25:18] mmm this middle territory just have to be a regular person
[00:25:22] everyone the rest of us have it awful i know
[00:25:25] i mean we just have to be like oh fuck i gotta pay my taxes
[00:25:28] i could be either person that's so smart they don't have to worry about it
[00:25:31] because they know how to like communicate with planets with their minds
[00:25:34] uh-huh and that's what you think is smart or the dumbest guy in the world
[00:25:37] the happiest man in the world the dumbest guy in the world who just gets
[00:25:40] to go to prison he just gets to be executed by the state
[00:25:44] that's it yeah probably you probably has a couple good times in there before
[00:25:49] there's plenty of good times it'll be funny to be on trial for like some
[00:25:53] horrific murder and then front of the victims family be like
[00:25:56] understand what i did is awful um i would like to make a statement now or
[00:26:02] put in my request for the final meal that i am
[00:26:07] understood that i am in enticed in tight uh
[00:26:12] that is owed to me and what i would like is to and this is a special
[00:26:20] request i understand but the joe's crab shack to go
[00:26:24] is not very good so i want to either have the prison converted into a joe's
[00:26:30] crab shack or have my second will you can put me in the
[00:26:34] handable lecture chair that's fine with me you don't need
[00:26:38] to ask you know tell me twice no permission as long as we're going to
[00:26:41] joe's crab shack and uh i'm getting the birthday song
[00:26:46] i also want to be executed on my birthday and also i want uh heroin
[00:26:53] that's part of the meal it's and pussy is if i eat it it's a meal
[00:26:57] i'm allowed to have pussage i would put pussy on there
[00:27:01] thank you your honor for the rape and murder of four years old
[00:27:05] tisha james we find you guilty and you were sentenced to die by execution
[00:27:11] by getting your dick sucked by a million ladies
[00:27:18] do it
[00:27:20] he has his best lawyer
[00:27:22] he's so smart yeah
[00:27:25] that's a crack legal team right there dude yeah
[00:27:29] that's julia honey this prime is it not enough for yeah i said i would do
[00:27:32] vincent price on this i can't remember what he sounds like
[00:27:36] to see this man die to see him die
[00:27:40] or can we see him get his dick sucked the way he wants and restore our own
[00:27:45] humanity that's right yeah that's that's that's kind of a
[00:27:49] young vincent price i thought it was like gay or something it is
[00:27:53] gayer yeah it's gayer yeah yeah it's galatore
[00:27:58] um i'm vincent price he's the original like gay villain he really was
[00:28:03] vincent price 1936 it's crazy that you all the way
[00:28:08] there do you feel a connection to that lady jadam
[00:28:12] what being a gay villain yeah damn he looks he looks fire in this little
[00:28:16] Egyptian outfit oh yeah you look cool there yeah
[00:28:19] i guess i didn't realize he was an actor i thought he just like made his own
[00:28:23] halloween movies mhm you like that big cat i have one in my apartment if you
[00:28:29] want to come over and take a look
[00:28:32] there
[00:28:33] but here's the voice though yeah we'll find something dude oh also
[00:28:38] bridge wallet oh yeah oh yeah dude that's a hell of a product bridge wallet
[00:28:42] calm bridge wall dot com what you guys talk about for a second well
[00:28:46] i i fucking love that shit dude that's one of my favorite type of wallets
[00:28:50] in fact every other type of wall can suck my fucking cock
[00:28:54] and slurp it up dry let's keep sucking till there's three or four loads till
[00:28:59] nothing but a poof of air comes out there's no even
[00:29:02] calm that's how much i love ridge wall and they have carbon fiber shit
[00:29:07] it's the first it's the they have you don't have to listen you don't need a
[00:29:12] bunch of fucking shit damn now i want to read watch the original
[00:29:15] house on a hill you don't need a bunch of shit in your fucking wallet you need
[00:29:18] four fucking things you need your fucking cards your
[00:29:22] id it holds 12 cards the ridge wallet you have
[00:29:25] up to 12 corner one of the only things on the show i personally use myself and
[00:29:28] would attest to and buy right even if the owner of the company called me
[00:29:33] a little piss baby cry cry baby nazi really yes
[00:29:38] you would even still do that the company is on the record saying that i am a
[00:29:42] nazi really and you still are fascist you go back for more like a little
[00:29:46] fact piss baby war they don't pay for these spots anymore
[00:29:50] no you just love the product we don't have to do business with
[00:29:53] fascists this is a pure testimony it's you and Andy Niga we were done with you
[00:29:58] uh-huh and you know i believe it's new and you know
[00:30:03] you know pretty sure it's handy niggas i don't think it was the way you're
[00:30:06] saying it does not seem right i'm i'm actually a professor i think
[00:30:10] you should maybe go back and believe those my name is is
[00:30:13] winston asia i'm a professor of chinese names
[00:30:18] at harvard university i'm a professor of chinese
[00:30:24] chinese ality right and i can assure you it's
[00:30:27] pronounced and no no it's it's really not and in
[00:30:30] a go and in a go okay so anyway everything's to go
[00:30:36] with the ridge wallet brought to you that's right
[00:30:38] in a go is the guy the faith getting when you're making your own journalism
[00:30:44] videos so rile up uh the president disabled mentally
[00:30:49] ill gay people are throwing things at you
[00:30:53] it's and calling it you calling it reporting calling it journalism yeah
[00:30:59] what the fuck is that guy i mean really i know you just he hates antifa
[00:31:04] yeah but it's all like you know i it's just him going to places where other
[00:31:10] anti-social people are right and being like
[00:31:14] am i in the way don't touch you know i'm not touching you yeah yeah yeah
[00:31:19] yeah which is not like that's not even political there's a lot of places i
[00:31:24] could go right now and be annoying sure get the shit kicked out of me
[00:31:27] and i can't be like oh wow can you believe this situation and for
[00:31:32] radio shack yeah it's just annoying yeah if you go in there and shove a camera
[00:31:36] in people's face eventually somebody's gonna swing on you
[00:31:38] right now but he's making good points and he's making good points while using
[00:31:42] the ridge wallet he always has that on his
[00:31:45] person oh these are nice superstar track pants thanks no they're a little
[00:31:49] fucking oh yeah they are i guess they are superstar i can tell by how shiny
[00:31:52] they are i thought i thought those go real well with the
[00:31:56] ridge wall they go great the ridge wallet slides right in
[00:31:58] those probably have the ridge wallet i have the fucking one with the phone
[00:32:02] yeah oh yeah that's right those who got a backpack too we forgot to mention
[00:32:05] we got to get the back back it looks nice we got to take a look because they got
[00:32:08] a bunch of other shit can they send a backpack
[00:32:11] you keep saying that and if they do i get it you have a nice backpack you don't
[00:32:15] get any of the i don't have a backpack right now so i i earned that backpack
[00:32:19] mm-hmm i haven't got i bought it i also shout out the ridge wallet i
[00:32:23] consulted them on i love the way their website looks
[00:32:26] yeah and so for my shirts i asked them for help oh really they're kind of pointing
[00:32:30] me in the right direction that's nice of them they're nice guys actually they're
[00:32:33] nice guys they're nice guys and the whole thing like that they're like they're
[00:32:37] ground up they started the whole thing in like a fucking garage respect to them
[00:32:40] yeah they put all the screws and they said they said shark tank and
[00:32:44] suck my dick fuck more cuban they go to shark tank no they don't even need to
[00:32:48] yeah they don't need to invest to the products that fucking good
[00:32:51] yeah that's right and they have fucking what do you have carbon fiber they got
[00:32:55] steel they got aluminum carbon fiber titanium they have
[00:32:59] a the metal you can't steal your information that's really not rfid
[00:33:03] blocking rfid that's what it's saying that you don't get a
[00:33:06] meter backpack it's weatherproof they got this this new one that says
[00:33:09] Damascus i don't know what that means that's awesome but it's kind of like a
[00:33:12] carrier it's kind of like a wood grain texture nice but i'm not sure what a
[00:33:16] backpack oh dude it's a wallet the wallet that
[00:33:21] be that oh they got leather phone cases i love that
[00:33:24] rich wall would look nice i don't think i might get i might get the leather i
[00:33:27] have a glass this one yeah i don't my thing is like i i i'd like to not
[00:33:33] i like to leave the house without my phone see i like that too i need my
[00:33:37] wallet because you know what if i have to do shopping
[00:33:40] mm-hmm shop mm-hmm there's a good point but the same time
[00:33:46] maybe the solution is yeah the solution is two ridge wallets
[00:33:51] one on your phone one off your phone oh they got knives now too
[00:33:55] i use that to search to double-circum size atom yeah i just want to
[00:33:59] chop is i appreciate you doing that because they didn't really
[00:34:02] finish the first time i don't really know shit about knives it looks nice
[00:34:07] but they're really good yeah well i mean here's the thing is you can't
[00:34:11] there's no way you can have this in New York City
[00:34:14] the knife uh yeah i look basically every knife is illegal
[00:34:18] they'll fucking say that yeah i carry a knife but i'm here against the law
[00:34:22] yeah i mean you're a rebel i'm a double dot com a homo i carry a swiss army knife
[00:34:28] so which invaluable by the way what's the kind of stuff is it helped you
[00:34:33] with um i i use a lot dude i mean if i
[00:34:37] oh it like there's stuff you don't even think about yeah like once you get used
[00:34:41] to having a knife on you all the time how about this why you should get the
[00:34:44] ridge wallet knife right because you're just there's
[00:34:48] the flip side of that is i carry a swiss army knife but i actually have two of
[00:34:51] them and i like cascade them with the fucking warranty
[00:34:55] department at victory knocks because i just fuck them up smart you know i'm
[00:34:59] not i'm not buying a sharpen or anything no so i send them off
[00:35:03] i'll send one off and then i have the other one
[00:35:05] one the other one comes back it's a nice little scam it's not a scam
[00:35:09] it's a scam no i paid for two knives with a lifetime i don't even know if they
[00:35:14] have i don't think they do but you call the knife
[00:35:18] ridge wallet probably has a ridge wallet listen the point is ridge wallet
[00:35:22] you should get the the better superior version of the product nik was just
[00:35:25] talking about which is a ridge wallet knife but i do want this
[00:35:30] because i i don't know if i have the forged carbon or the carbon fiber 3k
[00:35:34] whatever oh the Damascus one looks no i already saw that one
[00:35:38] it's just more expensive i might swap it would
[00:35:42] i kind of like this this this this uh just a regular aluminum black one
[00:35:48] maybe get that oh and they got a they got an aluminum tropical one in case
[00:35:53] you're a white coke yeah it's i think it's cool guys for the
[00:35:59] boardroom or the disc yeah when you're at the whether you're at the board room
[00:36:03] the disco or being asked to leave the entomens
[00:36:08] dispensary for asking for too many samples for having too many samples
[00:36:14] and i say do you know who my father is and they're like yes you don't care i'm
[00:36:17] like no i'm literally asking you i can't remember which one i am
[00:36:21] i'm the shirt one they both had them together yeah they also sell
[00:36:25] a wireless power bank love that um okay here we go multi gear
[00:36:31] we'll see what's in that shit oh they got one of those door hook openers
[00:36:35] love that there's now a thing that we all need they have a ridge wallet beanie
[00:36:39] they got a bottle opener that shaped like a credit card that i'm assuming slides
[00:36:44] in now that's cool give me your phone Adam yeah i'm looking at it right now
[00:36:47] yeah it slides into the ridge wallet look at that look at that
[00:36:52] i like that that's cool yeah that's cool now we're talking baby for beer
[00:36:56] and you got some some multi-tool action if you're a beer head
[00:37:00] they got keychains yep you know they got condoms yeah they got condoms
[00:37:06] to wear on your penis all right here we go we got a ripstop duffel bags
[00:37:12] oh they got this uh they got a travel kit
[00:37:20] and i'm looking at this now and i kind of want to
[00:37:22] so get it bro um don't deny yourself think my problem is i fuck up like the
[00:37:28] little dog kits or whatever because i would get one like every three years
[00:37:32] is a as like a christmas present for my grandma
[00:37:36] you know she would hit she would hit the little like
[00:37:38] coals end caps and get my shit going nice you know i was like i know i
[00:37:43] know i know i know i know i know i know i know i know i know i know
[00:37:51] maybe uh maybe like a time x weekend or yeah
[00:37:54] or a dob kit or whatever but then i just um all my fluids leak in there
[00:38:00] so this is the move is you get the the ridge wallet
[00:38:03] travel kit yeah um and you pay for it because you guys
[00:38:08] keep take care keep the you you do in this in this
[00:38:12] unprecedented time yeah what you need is to keep buying shit with our promo
[00:38:17] code yes and our promo code is definitely it's
[00:38:21] probably come down it's Kamala Harris 2020 it's Kamala 2024 it's uh it's uh
[00:38:26] it's uh it's Joe Biden 2020 here's Joe Biden yeah
[00:38:31] it's me Joe Biden it's me president Joe Biden
[00:38:35] i am Joe Biden oh my god i can't wait to bid Joe Biden
[00:38:39] i don't have to get the pussy from Joe
[00:38:45] come town
[00:38:49] promo code come down check out for for 10% off your order that's that's free
[00:38:54] money right there that's that's that's smart yeah ridge wallet dot com
[00:38:59] slash come town you can just go there go to that site they got a direct link
[00:39:03] arena yep that's to suck my dick arena one of the
[00:39:07] options if you buy enough ridge wallet you get to suck next you get to suck
[00:39:10] my cock so if you're a woman or let's be honest the gay man
[00:39:15] that's the one you need you need to buy four thousand dollars worth of ridge
[00:39:19] wallets and then a secret uh button will pop up women still don't like me but at
[00:39:24] least i don't get angry dms from them anymore that's good
[00:39:27] that's what that's honestly that's that's uh i'm i'm never been going to aim for
[00:39:32] being a guy that's just getting pussy all the time sure
[00:39:35] but being a guy that is no longer being scolded by women who don't know me
[00:39:42] why do you think that if you think that it was going to winter i'll just go
[00:39:45] because you're off twitter what's going to fix me is an angry message from you
[00:39:49] yeah yeah you're like you know what you're right i am a piece of
[00:39:53] shit that's so true i guess i'll just burn it all to the ground
[00:39:58] you're right i guess i'll go fucking get a regular job
[00:40:02] yeah you're absolutely correct i'll go back yeah i'll go back to
[00:40:07] selling being rich because you were right because you're so
[00:40:12] small so good fucking bitch we're never doing that
[00:40:17] yeah people are like oh what would you just say slurs because it's worth it
[00:40:21] for just to sell out and say slurs and it's like absolutely
[00:40:25] yeah dude if it really was that easy and it's not far off
[00:40:29] it's not it's absolutely not that i'm not making a technically yes
[00:40:34] but it's in the ballpark it's not like you could just be anybody
[00:40:38] sure and be like you're listening to uh to mike and steve and uh
[00:40:44] uh fucking Puerto Rican people yeah they use too much laundry detergent
[00:40:49] yeah right now i want to listen to that podcast
[00:40:54] the mike and steve mike and steve show would you like to check out at ridgewall.com
[00:40:58] slash come down handy niggoo handy now is it
[00:41:02] andy no is it not me no i'm sure it's not or what about
[00:41:06] no like new wins yeah but he's got a weird accent you remember he invented his own
[00:41:10] accent where's he from he's from uh via the
[00:41:14] nom i think i don't know none of those guys are from maybe
[00:41:19] in there really that always wears me out there like
[00:41:22] immigrants that are like i'm i'm a bitch and uh and that's what he sounds like
[00:41:27] i can't wait to and this they threw milkshake at me
[00:41:32] they threw the milkshake at me they threw that milkshake at old ande
[00:41:37] oh he's from portland andes from portland no but originally why does he talk like
[00:41:41] that no he's born in portland originally
[00:41:45] how does he talk yeah oh there's like there's like a bunch of asian comics to
[00:41:49] do a joke oh no no he's like oh where you're from and i'm like
[00:41:52] uh america and they're like oh well you know what i mean
[00:41:55] and then it's like is the audience supposed to be on your side here you know
[00:41:58] what they fucking mean right answer the question i say where's your family
[00:42:02] from yeah but i got an ad because i'm an immigrant i'm like oh
[00:42:05] mom from my family from greece how about you uh
[00:42:08] beautiful it's a beautiful chess move right i just don't ask
[00:42:13] i don't ask questions of anybody about them that's true
[00:42:16] you don't really make that much small talk hmm
[00:42:19] you make big talk yeah big talk mm-hmm when i made an asian person i would say
[00:42:23] what would it take to get you to kill another man
[00:42:26] uh
[00:42:29] those are the questions i'm interested in big talk no small talk yeah
[00:42:33] if you had if you had to kill one of your children which one would it be
[00:42:38] would it be sofy yeah is the daughter named sofy that would be interesting
[00:42:43] if they gave it away in the title no the main bitch has to be named sofy
[00:42:48] i've never seen the movie but sofy's choice sofy's making the choice i've
[00:42:52] never actually never seen the movie either but i
[00:42:54] kids to kill i think it's probably her she's got to be
[00:42:58] yeah so the movie is one you have to kill one of your kids she has to have
[00:43:02] sex with one kid and kill the other whoa the Nazis are making a merry
[00:43:06] fuck kill you know eric clap and wrote that really
[00:43:09] yeah i didn't know you were you friends with them you keep disappearing whenever
[00:43:12] eric comes oh uh no i'm afraid of them you're afraid of them i got too high off
[00:43:17] cushy dreams oh dude yeah yeah cushy dreams is a wonderful
[00:43:23] product in fact if me and adam had smoked cushy dream i think i think i
[00:43:26] would be wait hold on let me just double check whether
[00:43:30] you got too high off cushy dreams are too high off
[00:43:33] i don't know mac welden or something no don't do that move
[00:43:38] cushy dreams oh okay yeah i think i'll get too high off smoking underwear next
[00:43:42] week
[00:43:46] now that i take a look at the
[00:43:49] schedule here it seems like a yes i've penciled in
[00:43:52] getting blasted off underwear but we'll have to wait a week for that
[00:43:57] right this week we're smoking we're smoking high quality premium CBD
[00:44:02] and some might say if we had smoked CBD instead of actual weed
[00:44:07] me and adam would have contributed something more to this episode i think
[00:44:10] it's fine you know what this is a late night special that's it seems a little
[00:44:13] late i'm overheated because i'm worried dude i'm hot as
[00:44:16] shit yeah do you think it's the meat switch it is
[00:44:19] we need a 10 pound pork we need a 10 pound pork
[00:44:23] children is done it's over i thought we were gonna have
[00:44:26] lunch tomorrow i thought we got sandwiches i bought fucking tacos
[00:44:29] how about we got guys who live right after this by
[00:44:32] the whole bag of beef jerky and pie making the chills
[00:44:36] we're getting a pie we're not making a pie just walking in
[00:44:40] both hands in the in the three excel hoodie pockets
[00:44:44] basketball shorts pulled down below your ass
[00:44:48] y'all got pie shit yeah we're on vacation
[00:44:53] no we came from the city yo have you been to that weed dispensary
[00:44:57] we got so faded off that dispensary earlier oh fucking gotta take some
[00:45:01] ad we just came up here from bushwick we've been shooting a
[00:45:04] skateboarding video for 17 and a half years and now we're up here to get away
[00:45:10] from coronavirus get away from it all yeah i'm clark this is Tyler
[00:45:14] Skyler, Tyler, and Tyler, and he's from India
[00:45:18] he's yeah Tyler, hey what's up
[00:45:21] what's up i was born in bro jyler did you bring your hookah
[00:45:28] all the way from bushwick we're gonna we got to go back to bushwick
[00:45:33] that's right so anyway we're unfortunately we love
[00:45:38] well not we love cushy we love cushy dreams almost as much as one of those
[00:45:42] simpletons from bushwick that's right don't live in the refined low cows of
[00:45:46] different styles yeah that's right you guys don't understand
[00:45:49] you guys are they don't even deliver the new yorker to bushwick yeah
[00:45:54] they won't even go that far out yeah you guys are classy bed-sty guys just
[00:45:59] i love bed-sty and me i'm a fucking queen's rat
[00:46:02] bushwick can suck a dick oh absolutely i'm with you
[00:46:05] bushwick is the worst neighborhood 100 yeah
[00:46:08] bushwick followed by williams
[00:46:11] and these williamsburgers you get a nice view we'll do all the worst
[00:46:14] neighborhoods brought to you by cushy dreams
[00:46:16] cushy dreams is proud to bring you the worst neighborhoods in new york city
[00:46:20] ranked right the worst bushwick number two
[00:46:24] south williamsburg so i'm with you there uh
[00:46:27] number three regular williamsburg no come on there's kind of nice
[00:46:31] no yeah it's not bad towards greenpoint it's fine
[00:46:35] yeah i'm not the views are going to williamsburg no it's like going to town
[00:46:39] yeah anything we're there to go to the apple store south
[00:46:42] south of makaren park and suck a dick oh green points nice
[00:46:45] green points all right yeah yeah uh then what are your top some
[00:46:49] interesting going i'm that's what i was trying to do the body
[00:46:52] rail the list when you said oh come on williamsburgers where's the
[00:46:56] place worse than what is i don't fuck it out of east
[00:46:59] new york not east new york's fine it's just uh an impoverished food
[00:47:04] desert yeah with that's where you want to hang out
[00:47:07] i wouldn't i don't have any animosity towards east new york
[00:47:10] listen man i don't have any animosity but
[00:47:14] i moved out of baltimore because it's not as nice as i'll tell you what i've
[00:47:17] done in east new york i got things sandblasted there and i had a nice
[00:47:21] conversation with a man that owns a uh motorcycle customization
[00:47:26] show they do have a lot of auto shops there yeah
[00:47:29] there's connoisse like how far are we going here
[00:47:32] connoissees got good food you would rather live in connoissees than williamsburg
[00:47:36] actually yeah it's way cheaper you can get a whole fucking house for like
[00:47:40] six hundred thousand dollars no fucking chance would you connoissees like by the
[00:47:45] the broadway junction if my options were rent a three thousand dollar a month
[00:47:50] one bedroom apartment in williamsburg you find or buy a house in connoissee
[00:47:54] buy house you could buy gg will as well yeah it's not that expensive but it sucks
[00:47:58] anyway i'm sorry i do you know the list you can also we don't have to have a real
[00:48:02] conversation the cliche dreams the cliche dreams
[00:48:05] where's the place where all those uh... jews that have the protest where
[00:48:11] midwood or burrow park midwood yeah burrow park
[00:48:14] midwoods midwoods pretty midwoods midwoods very midwoods all right burrow park
[00:48:20] i like you know what i like southern brokle in a lot
[00:48:23] i like south bros and connoissee you're going to lose me on that you know
[00:48:26] be kind of a great sense of
[00:48:29] midwood even the
[00:48:30] incense in herst
[00:48:31] yes benson herst and grapes and they got into good restaurants
[00:48:34] bayry you don't even fucking leave in new york anymore
[00:48:37] no that's real new york dude have you seen
[00:48:40] have you seen uh... spiky joint that the speech
[00:48:45] benson herst
[00:48:47] whatever i'm sorry we just have drastically pneumonia garlands i think is
[00:48:50] technically a grave set but i'm going to give that one to bence i think it might
[00:48:54] be yeah
[00:48:56] yeah
[00:48:57] anyway go on i'm sorry the worst neighbors in new york going
[00:49:00] ozone park probably pretty bad they got the aqueduct
[00:49:05] they have the racetrack so what is that on you go bet on pony so we've never
[00:49:09] done it but you can
[00:49:11] that be cool and you can go bet on ponies in howard beach
[00:49:15] howard beach is hilarious i also saw uh... mark seven lsc that's been uh
[00:49:21] had like a custom like t5 swap or something for sale on howard beach
[00:49:26] okay it's a great great move
[00:49:31] uh... so okay for what else
[00:49:33] credit french village um it's nice
[00:49:37] it's i wouldn't live there yeah
[00:49:39] howard beach i'm not it's really just this three bad neighborhoods in the
[00:49:42] york it's
[00:49:43] bushwick williamsburg and south williamsburg
[00:49:49] there's no fucking worst parts and that was brought to you by cushy dreams
[00:49:53] actually yeah and you can put it in promo content on 20
[00:49:57] mario can suck a dick oh yeah that's actually the real answer
[00:50:00] no mad can suck a dick turtle bay
[00:50:03] although they have these two really cool part of the buildings there
[00:50:07] that would be kind of chill to live in
[00:50:09] where they have these i think it's in turtle bay or
[00:50:13] first turtle bay it's like all in the midtown east east side
[00:50:18] yeah yeah i'm with you there
[00:50:20] cushy dreams also the u in buildings pretty cool you
[00:50:23] that is cool i i love that i like riding up i ride up the east side on my body
[00:50:27] riding up the f t r and that the because i just take the bridge over to queen
[00:50:32] is that the u in building is one of my favorite buildings in the
[00:50:34] north and especially after you watch north by northwest
[00:50:37] yeah you get to see that ship pretty cool pretty cool and you can smoke cushy
[00:50:41] dreams no matter where you are i'm about snort my fat brass
[00:50:45] and it's uh it won't go okay all over it is i love that
[00:50:49] and uh who's the guy in that movie kerry grant yeah
[00:50:52] kerry he's like uh
[00:50:55] oh what the hell is this a bunch of cocaine
[00:50:59] he probably was gay in real life but he pretended to fuck with me
[00:51:02] pussy yeah i don't know sounds good dame sounds good to get some pussy
[00:51:08] are you sure you're not talking about rock hudson i'm pretty sure
[00:51:11] well i guess it's time to have sex with your pussy
[00:51:16] just another day just another day here at north by northwest well
[00:51:20] listen mac you don't have to have sex with my pussy if you don't want to
[00:51:23] i want to dammit i want to and one of these days i'll get my
[00:51:28] dick on i'll promise you i promise you i will i've just
[00:51:33] i've smoked too much cushy dreams which actually that's the reason it's even as
[00:51:38] hard as it is become so hard that it's killed you
[00:51:43] if you want your dick to get if you like sexy i love this
[00:51:47] for a full line premium smokable cbd that's the same ingredients in viagra
[00:51:51] and she that's right oh dude he lived with his
[00:51:54] his friend thank you guy swish what just ruined he was addicted and he was
[00:52:00] addicted to suntanic i love suntanic i mean
[00:52:05] although i guess that sounds a lot like me too i live with my friend
[00:52:09] i love suntanic and it's now shipping legally to all 50
[00:52:12] states all 50 states get your fucking cbd
[00:52:16] and you know what do you want to eat it with a fucking gummy here's something
[00:52:19] you can want to vape it now there's nothing you can do with it you can
[00:52:22] discuss benefits experienced personally or look up some common cbd benefits
[00:52:26] oh yeah and i don't know that might be for us which i
[00:52:29] love i got so blasted off cbd that i started google and common cbd benefits
[00:52:35] and it was less anxiety going to bed it's not my aches and pains they
[00:52:42] went down oh i love cbd because it makes me feel
[00:52:48] like an a street latina i went down the h street
[00:52:56] and they got latinas with ashes so big you feel like you're fucked up
[00:53:04] so it was it was mike oh we already do we just
[00:53:07] mike from brazil yeah mike goes to brazil where mike in brazil was
[00:53:11] a separate latinas was part of the bang bang
[00:53:14] that was but then mike have his own whole smokin you a cbd
[00:53:18] yeah they spicy latinas or something nobody had like a
[00:53:21] to deliver cbd it's kind of i think mike in brazil was
[00:53:24] with the mill funter was on the same mill funter i was a big fan well i
[00:53:28] that was the job i wanted but i do not get
[00:53:32] fifth grade job fair i came i came to class i said i want to be a mill
[00:53:36] funner whatever next to the t hc next to the
[00:53:39] independent lab testing shows compliance and purity
[00:53:43] it's awesome grown in california in Oregon
[00:53:46] each plant is hand selected by a team of experienced cannabis flower experts
[00:53:52] alternative for people looking to suck their own cock that's right
[00:53:56] looking for you spoke this year i'm sorry
[00:53:59] alternative it's perfect alternative for people looking to cut back on sucking
[00:54:03] their other cock sucking other cock smoking other things
[00:54:07] so okay let's roll back oh no not this sorry i got it wrong
[00:54:11] i think it would know what's over guy let's try that okay one more listen
[00:54:17] no pressure managers to take your time with it
[00:54:20] it mixes well with other races you can smoke
[00:54:23] okay each sorry no i don't know i'm sorry okay from the other stuff
[00:54:28] looks like guy quality marijuana feels like a cock sliding into your ass
[00:54:32] marijuana and taste like high quality marijuana
[00:54:35] no CBD content is up to 20 percent which is some of the highest in the game
[00:54:41] got that one right yeah good job all right
[00:54:44] nice job charles you'll clean all this you know we'll clean it up in post all
[00:54:47] right perfect the attention to detail is noticeable
[00:54:51] in every beautiful anus smoking your CBD is the most efficient
[00:54:55] quickest way to deliver child pornography no time out
[00:54:59] time we can let you slide with anus but friend that hides it in this
[00:55:03] in stuff crush pieces the way sides what now you're not even making a mistake
[00:55:08] you're just going off the top of the dough i'm trying to get it just get in
[00:55:12] just look at the words i'm sure some of us need to tell secrets
[00:55:17] part of being good voice over actor is slipping secrets
[00:55:21] you'll you'll thank me later when i get to the disclaimer
[00:55:25] each batch is slow cured for two to four weeks to guarantee maximum freshness
[00:55:30] and those are the flavor and cannabinoids they take the artist in approach
[00:55:34] everyone is small batch organic farming practices
[00:55:38] no slaves 100 percent zero slaves okay i like that
[00:55:44] movie like they make drugs but the women after that be naked
[00:55:48] yeah makes you want to make sure no one puts anything in her pussy
[00:55:52] yeah she's not stealing yeah we're gonna have to put my cock in your
[00:55:55] post-sew to make just a check just make sure you don't you're not putting any
[00:55:58] weed in there that's right they they make the women get
[00:56:02] stan every woman that works in cussy dreams factory every
[00:56:05] but as make all they get your fucking
[00:56:09] hot as she's so hot i know we're supposed to be auditioning for this
[00:56:13] read but i just had nine okay go ahead man if you can get this to mark
[00:56:17] Cuban let me know all right it's Papa John's but the pizza
[00:56:21] comes in a woman's pussy i think i can get marked on the horn
[00:56:26] i think i can get marked on the horn i think we should get you on the
[00:56:28] let's start tweeting at him so tell us about your idea brother man
[00:56:32] what you got what you got okay you gave in
[00:56:38] that doesn't sound anything like the guy and we know who you're doing
[00:56:43] my kids are wonderful i sell bullshit on qbc
[00:56:52] i sell bullshit for stupid women and i would like to hear your ideas
[00:56:59] sir i was doing a voice over and i realized there's no way to order pizza
[00:57:06] that comes in a pussy right everyone's nodding yeah it's
[00:57:10] papa pussies pizza pussy and it comes in a bang bus so you get to
[00:57:16] fuck the girl you get to fuck the girl how many sales have you made
[00:57:21] how many sales have you made you know how to make pizza
[00:57:25] i know how to say things that's where you come in
[00:57:34] if you give me 18 million dollars i will recreate 9-11 as part of a
[00:57:40] marketing campaign for papa's pussy
[00:57:44] the reason people don't like papa johns anymore is because he's racist
[00:57:49] but with the help of dame and brother man
[00:57:55] we'll be able to rebrand papa johns as a black owned business
[00:57:59] yeah and corner the market hell yeah well papa why do you have to be
[00:58:05] involved because i want to fuck the girls
[00:58:07] who bring you pizza so you just want to be a customer
[00:58:14] you want to say your answers to start this business so you can order from it
[00:58:20] i misunderstood the premise of shark hair
[00:58:27] i guess i've never seen the show okay second i do it's a show like shark
[00:58:33] tank but it's things you want to have and it's called it's called pussy tank
[00:58:40] and you come in and millionaires have to buy pussy for you
[00:58:44] and pizza you get a piece of pizza that comes in the pussy
[00:58:50] what is it you separate ideas so both your ideas are well
[00:58:54] pussy can i please have money or pussy they sell pre-roll cbd
[00:59:00] relax peace create high-level energy dream
[00:59:05] dream is a nighttime hybrid indica dominant love us that's the indica
[00:59:10] bends the setiva over this is thumb it says your name is grace now
[00:59:16] you with thomas on the outside and here you grace the tank engine
[00:59:19] oh no i'm just getting my wife
[00:59:23] thomas getting raped and trained jail it would be funny to like get arrested
[00:59:28] you got to do like ten years or whatever and like you want to look tough before
[00:59:32] you go to jail so you get like a thomas the tank engine too
[00:59:36] like the tasmanian that will be stuff they're like this so protect me
[00:59:41] this is a one-year number of customers yeah
[00:59:44] it would you know be horrible get about to get out of jail your last day you
[00:59:48] get raped oh yeah that would be the danny glover
[00:59:51] that's what they call that that one avenue well it's kind of the premise at least
[00:59:55] yeah he's about to retire yeah yeah i think i'm one more day in prison
[01:00:01] rigs if you get me raped i swear to god i'm gonna raise my son
[01:00:07] i'm fucking crazy man i'm crazy i'm fucking crazy i'm
[01:00:11] one more fucking whack job what if what if you get raped it's the only way to turn
[01:00:15] to tell me i'm something with a bomb what if
[01:00:19] who's bomb is gonna go off unless you get raped
[01:00:24] rigs are you fucking stupid that's not how bombs
[01:00:32] you should know this man you were special forces
[01:00:35] true i'm trying to remember anything about the movie yeah i don't really
[01:00:39] remember much i don't remember i see i remember he gets
[01:00:42] pussy from the in the third one yeah
[01:00:45] Mel Gibson Joe Pesci in the second of the third one yeah oh that's a great one
[01:00:50] yeah show the weapon three is so good yeah show with a dumb dumb bullet
[01:00:54] mm-hmm you know what that is no we saw a guy she got shot in his thumb
[01:00:57] and he died there's only a lot of her lethal weapon three
[01:01:00] uh-huh lethal weapon four you tell me this guy's Chinese
[01:01:04] oh yeah i never it's the four four's not good there's a joke in four
[01:01:09] where he gets beat up by jat lee and then he sees rene vrusa the next day she
[01:01:14] said what's wrong and he said i had he said bad Chinese
[01:01:21] and i remember thinking that was pretty funny it's a little okay
[01:01:24] that's pretty good i'm so i stand by that i stand by that Mel
[01:01:30] maybe maybe it's time to maybe tonight after this when we wait for the bar to be
[01:01:35] baked we go to 7-11 okay and we buy one of those portable
[01:01:40] DVD plays we also why don't we just watch on the internet tv
[01:01:45] because i want to watch the movies outside it's good too cool man i'm trying to eat
[01:01:50] ice cubes and watch all the weapon movies and 300
[01:01:54] i did them all a couple years ago battlefield earth
[01:01:57] you did them all i would love to see battlefield earth i love to watch that
[01:02:01] i love probably for the listener we've been talking about it for three
[01:02:04] other so i'm not bad i'd love to watch
[01:02:11] wait two and a half weeks for us but i don't feel
[01:02:18] so okay let's go back to talking about milf hunter there was a one
[01:02:22] there was one scene he was special forces there's one
[01:02:26] there's one there's a blah no she's a brunette woman wait do we say
[01:02:32] kushy dreams promo code promo code comtown 20 come town 20
[01:02:36] get 20 percent off your first k u s h y dreamers.com
[01:02:40] use promo code comtown comtown for 20 percent off your organs the name of the
[01:02:44] show comtown c u m t o w n kushy dreams
[01:02:51] i'm gonna get those tattooed on my because you can like mama's like
[01:02:52] manta the reads yeah that reads and then what their promo
[01:02:56] codes the promo codes that's a good idea i gotta come up in 2021 we need a
[01:03:00] better system for remembering the stuff yeah there's
[01:03:04] google josh shit is well we could just print them
[01:03:07] i was doing that for a while but then i will just have that yeah we'll have
[01:03:11] ended up being printed i don't remember seeing a single print one time i
[01:03:16] saw i used to do it i'd say if we have one folder that has a
[01:03:21] laminate is a copy and we laminate each one of the
[01:03:24] laminate lake it's fucking eliminated as professional
[01:03:27] land that's not saying this job series shit and one of those things and see
[01:03:31] what happens yeah laminate a shit yeah laminate it's
[01:03:34] all like a little uh that would be fucked up and then turn that into your
[01:03:38] teacher smear yeah let's say just tell me what
[01:03:42] great i don't want to get like a blister pack ceiling machine and then take a
[01:03:45] shit and then blister pack seal it and then bring it to game stop and i'll be
[01:03:49] like yeah i want to return this copy of uh
[01:03:52] gears of war three and it's just shit in there that's the guy's like very
[01:03:57] funny that's a great bit um is that a bad game no i don't i
[01:04:03] know i in fact i think i liked it i was trying to think of the really
[01:04:08] shitty game and i game games can't really be shitty
[01:04:13] you just stop playing them yeah i like how dare they make yeah i know
[01:04:18] you wasted 60 fucking dollars on a game you don't play that's shitty um
[01:04:22] well i don't think i've done that i don't think there's been any game i've
[01:04:25] been like fucking like did i because i don't really buy
[01:04:28] many games yeah that's you know get the big temples yeah i play like a
[01:04:32] one game a year right red dead redemption was the last big
[01:04:35] thing to play and then after that i went back to i've been playing i
[01:04:38] i'm still in the story mode of grand theft auto v2 bro
[01:04:42] what is the next one coming up i don't know but that game came out like
[01:04:45] 2013 yeah i've been playing it's that's a lot of
[01:04:47] years i think they put it i think they're putting it on
[01:04:51] playstation 5 that's wild saying releasing you when you fucking pricks
[01:04:56] well the like it's i mean it's insane how long that game is and you don't
[01:05:00] want to play it you're only playing it because four was great
[01:05:03] yeah no i want to play it that's good gt i've found the story of five
[01:05:08] i did but i don't finish most of them oh really yeah
[01:05:11] four i loved four is great but i didn't finish it yeah
[01:05:15] play i just like to you know fuck around they need a new city
[01:05:19] yeah we should be maybe like Brazil yeah that would rule they should do
[01:05:23] brazil or they should do italy or something like a favela
[01:05:25] fuck yeah this is going around favelas yeah i like that modern warfare too
[01:05:30] this those brazil levels never played modern warfare yeah
[01:05:34] no i'm just heavy back in the grandeurismo now my dick is too hard i love
[01:05:38] it dude and my shoulder doesn't hurt anymore
[01:05:40] that was the other thing that's what changed it
[01:05:43] you should hold yourself because i had a wheel but i got a chair for the wheel
[01:05:46] finally and now your posture is correct yeah fix it and now
[01:05:50] now i can drive for hours that's why i don't have the same shoulder
[01:05:53] problem drive yeah not play it's right it's driving
[01:05:58] simulated driving it's the same as being in a risk
[01:06:03] part they can drive right it literally is the same
[01:06:07] as you're laughing but i mean it's it's the same
[01:06:12] do you have a do you have a rumble pack in the seat
[01:06:17] no i don't know you should get that you should get it so it feels like you're
[01:06:20] in a car you can't get you can't look if if we ever got if somehow
[01:06:24] we got to the point where we're making a million dollars yeah
[01:06:29] a year then maybe i would get a motion rig now we're
[01:06:33] because they're fucking like ten thousand dollars nothing for your
[01:06:37] for your right room that you're building right now you would have to
[01:06:41] be yeah you would have to because you need like it has like three
[01:06:44] TVs so you see the like the trees passing you and then you also too
[01:06:49] fuck yes bro yeah i don't know if that works with
[01:06:52] consoles you gotta have to build like a you have to build like a racing sim
[01:06:56] where's the rig and then worth every fucking penny and then there's other
[01:06:59] game like i have i have project cars too and i've played it a couple of times
[01:07:04] but i can say about grandeurismo strikes it
[01:07:07] project cars too is i think that the biggest racing sims are like i racing
[01:07:13] and project i think i racing is the most popular
[01:07:16] that's real shit yeah that's gets into the territory guys that like take
[01:07:20] simulated racing like very seriously or whatever
[01:07:23] could you do you if you worked really hard become formula one race car driver
[01:07:28] of course without question that would be a good one for you because
[01:07:34] it's if i worked really hard i couldn't even become a guy that's good at grand
[01:07:37] to reason
[01:07:39] i mean this is not on the table i can marginally improve
[01:07:44] what's what life starting over the handicap of course
[01:07:47] marginal improvements yeah that's what being in your 30s about is just
[01:07:50] accepting that like except it getting sneaking in just a little bit of
[01:07:54] improvement until it's all once once things happening like where you
[01:07:58] start getting joint pain from doing math yeah
[01:08:02] then i got sore from playing catch the other day yeah
[01:08:06] yeah that's because you were playing it with your asshole
[01:08:10] that's right somebody was throwing a ball into your
[01:08:13] ass no it wasn't a penis catch whatever you've seen the inside of his ass
[01:08:17] it's filled with cum slack tights i thought young vincent price
[01:08:23] oh i used to listen to what it sounds like it's yeah i couldn't find it i was
[01:08:28] driving me nuts because i can't i just want to real quick say
[01:08:31] if anyone has ever seen the if everyone knows we're going to clip that's
[01:08:35] very fun turn that's why i want to do it where the lady has a bobs
[01:08:37] said we should watch that is is house on a hotel
[01:08:40] both the original and then the remake which is also she neither
[01:08:43] they're good she's got pretty big tits she's
[01:08:46] she's a brunette bob at a certain point of the
[01:08:50] couple minute thing that i've jacked off to probably at this point but i guess
[01:08:53] i've been it like uh 17 years excuse me excuse me
[01:08:58] 17 years ago she pushed she tugged on her ear
[01:09:02] i before she fucked the guy i think i think you're up in a mall i think
[01:09:07] 17 years ago i found it anyway brunette bob kind of big titties
[01:09:11] mom if anyone could get me that clip from milf hunter i would
[01:09:15] honestly be really thrilled and it hits were big go ahead
[01:09:18] it hits were very big you enjoyed it and if you find it i haven't been able to
[01:09:21] find it if you can find it for stop rose i've looked for it
[01:09:25] five years like a girl who got away yeah a girl who came in and started
[01:09:30] sometimes you know classics pop up on like x
[01:09:34] videos stuff they used to beat off to the little teasers
[01:09:38] remember the teasers couple weeks you would have to beat off to the 90
[01:09:41] second teasers oh yeah and now sometimes those pop up
[01:09:45] on the full version and that feels good that feels good that feels
[01:09:49] all feels good yeah i feel fucking good
[01:09:53] it feels like you get the fuck ago you kissed
[01:09:56] you know i consumed years ago i've consumed probably
[01:10:00] a cumulative amount of like
[01:10:04] almost you know what none i don't think i've looked at porn once this year
[01:10:08] what yeah what the fuck are you talking about no yeah i just haven't
[01:10:13] how many what do you jack off to nothing
[01:10:16] what are you thoughts yeah i kind of got back into that but i mean that's
[01:10:21] that's impressive not much going on in my head either it's like i just need to
[01:10:23] beat off that's artistic is it yeah you're making you're making
[01:10:28] stuff up in your brain now i mean it's gotten so far to the point now where
[01:10:33] it's like having a cigarette but i also don't be off that often maybe like
[01:10:36] once a week yeah once a week yeah i've been beating off
[01:10:42] quite a bit you haven't been beating off over here have you i actually haven't
[01:10:46] good tonight because we said we're not going i beat i'm pretty i've been
[01:10:50] honestly you've been off twice yeah oh there's there's a mirror in his
[01:10:54] bed before but i haven't beat off yet but i feel it coming i'm
[01:10:58] there's way too many mirrors in this bathroom a lot of mirrors it's fucking
[01:11:01] insane it's like okay i don't need to see i like it
[01:11:04] what my posture looks like i like seeing it i like it's just me
[01:11:07] me in there yeah you need sometimes you need to be confronted with that kind of
[01:11:11] shit yes yes and and the pig shall have his spoils
[01:11:15] the squealy pig the deplete let's let's go let's go let's see what
[01:11:21] Vincent Price sounds like Vincent Price sounds like this
[01:11:26] then by the door with a large sack for the
[01:11:28] large sack again and then get rid of the kids by trick or treat
[01:11:33] trick or treat he's over there though yes he's
[01:11:36] a lot in horror you're the young Vincent Price
[01:11:39] well i i don't think that's so bad as a matter of fact yeah i
[01:11:42] i've been all right that add a shut it off we forget we have headphones on
[01:11:46] oh yeah i'm sorry so you're fucking everything up here
[01:11:49] am i making a lot of god fuck you fuck you all right i'm gonna make a
[01:11:54] pie for these fellows oh this is the episode over it is
[01:11:58] i'm gonna miss this why we're gonna keep doing this but without having to
[01:12:02] do the episode we're better you get higher
[01:12:04] i'm making a joke fuck you yeah fuck you fuck you
[01:12:09] yeah fuck you goodbye everybody if you enjoy the show
[01:12:14] you should actually you should subscribe at
[01:12:17] com patreon yeah patreon slash comtown double the
[01:12:20] episode five bucks a month for fucking extra
[01:12:23] i was a month i would say the last premium episode we did maybe one of my
[01:12:28] favorites so i certainly have the year
[01:12:32] and uh and it's been it's honestly for such a
[01:12:36] shit year this last quarter has really
[01:12:40] invigorated my passion for broadcasting yes sir
[01:12:46] and i'd say now that the the autumn years of my life have begun i'm dying by
[01:12:52] the way yes oh yeah nichor you ready to
[01:12:56] yeah we let them know how funny it would be if i was dying and i was like
[01:13:00] well we better record several hundred episodes
[01:13:03] it's my goodbye yeah it's something you're leaving
[01:13:07] something to adam is everyone knows yeah
[01:13:11] so adam can live off the show for the rest of his life
[01:13:15] and i will join vincent in the grave of gay beyond
[01:13:19] i will become a gay icon in death in a way i could never attain in life
[01:13:25] imagine doing the show if you were dying
[01:13:29] right
[01:13:33] fuck dude that would be so sad i know you're
[01:13:38] fucking though just like how about um
[01:13:45] i'm sorry the pain is just michael clark don't condone us
[01:13:52] beep beep beep
[01:13:58] boss to make him be cut all the munchkins with my ass
[01:14:04] B