Cum Town | Regular | 01/27/2021
[00:00:14] Yeah, he's not I don't give let's not part of my job
[00:00:17] Wait cuz you want to watch me walk across the room?
[00:00:19] I am in this outfit that you made me wear before we recorded
[00:00:23] I do want to know what the outfit that you want to be wearing Canadian Mountain to make body paint to make the boys jealous
[00:00:37] Mr. USB let me see if this does if it's still plays. I don't know if it's a
[00:00:46] It's coming through the headphones cool all right
[00:00:48] Then I don't have to worry about it because I was recording I guess the phone does like both channels here
[00:00:54] Instead of interesting interesting welcome to come town folks
[00:01:06] Gardening oh, yeah, we're gonna grow shallots. We should pick the most boring
[00:01:11] Gardening is not boring. Yeah. No, yeah, we're getting not gardening. What's the what are the magazines that are just like shit for your patio?
[00:01:17] It's just like housewives in the 80s. They'll be like I need more wicker
[00:01:23] I'm gonna read a magazine. Yeah, I'm gonna sit in my fucking like and we're about different fuck my wooden ass kitchen
[00:01:30] I would like I would like a magazine like that
[00:01:33] Yeah, I've gotten into some integrity or decorating soft focus patio shit magazine
[00:01:39] Yeah, I don't have a patio just creamy creamy ass patty patio furniture creamy. Yeah, just real
[00:01:46] Look at they just I don't really fuck with the wicker stuff. Honestly. No, I'm talking about the photography. Oh, yeah
[00:01:52] Yeah, there's Vaseline over the lenses. Yeah, yeah real real soft the same way they shoot Barbara Walters old ass
[00:01:58] The way yeah, the way even though what she was used to be shot back in that is true when you go in like that
[00:02:03] Was a great way to go in some guys garage and he just had like
[00:02:08] Holy shit, the curly is like a perm and those like back when they're not quite cone titties because cone titties were out
[00:02:15] And back when they yeah back when they were like, you know, sometimes an Asian bitch can have big tits. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah
[00:02:22] The beginning of that there was a lot of that it would growing up and going to like my dad and his friends like shops
[00:02:27] That's what I mean. It's very it's very garage. Totally. Yeah, very garage
[00:02:31] You just saw a naked bitch. So what you're supposed to be hard while you're fucking yeah
[00:02:45] Yeah, sorry, uh, I was supposed to be done today, but I got got put a portal all over the walls and I kept
[00:02:52] Not so it's gonna be a couple more days and we're gonna have to charge you for it. Yeah
[00:02:57] I think I've mentioned this before but I got a hair cut the busting surgery. I got a haircut
[00:03:02] for at a Dominican barbershop in Bushwick once and they had like a kitchen TV like moms would have in their
[00:03:08] Yeah, kitchens like seven inches just playing just hardcore anal anal. Yeah, anal like at like an 1130 on a Tuesday
[00:03:17] I said it to you in Doc X format. Thanks Nick. Wow. You motherfuckers have Microsoft. No, I don't
[00:03:26] Know the copy was sent to me in Microsoft format everybody that works for
[00:03:32] Anybody that has any kind of like middleman media job. They'll use doc use think pads
[00:03:37] Because they're a little novos. Yeah, they're a whole world is is held up by the the myth of
[00:03:44] PowerPoints and Excel spreadsheets necessary for anything
[00:03:47] But I feel like I feel like we're past as Google Docs really came through and put they dick all up in
[00:03:55] Microsoft we're sitting on living in a baby. I'm a really happy
[00:03:59] World, you know, we're not even more data
[00:04:03] So what do you mean? It's not gonna be the people are gonna go on touch just feel yeah motion. Yeah, yeah, it sounds sensual
[00:04:09] Yeah, that's the kind of world that's the softball. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah sitting on a wicker chair get my dick
[00:04:16] Absolutely fucking last your printer smells fucking bad at him. That's my ass. No, it's the printer
[00:04:22] What's the time is sitting between you and the printer? First of all bitch. Why would I was joking?
[00:04:27] I can say it's my ass. You can't you just had a you just had a sort of
[00:04:33] Okay, and I wasn't gonna say anything yeah, I did because I'm sweaty so I
[00:04:49] Getting and you know what now with your fucking attitude about my bike ride. I'm absolutely wasn't an attitude
[00:04:54] And can I just say something soft really I just say I ripped you know what off lead
[00:04:58] You know what the printer does smell bad. Why is it key printing? Is it multiple pages?
[00:05:02] I thought it was a one it's your printer. It's your man. Maybe you were printing something before and yeah
[00:05:14] Just so many fucking black and white pictures of a man's penis what the fuck are you printing out on him?
[00:05:22] What is that you fucking retard? What did you print out? You printed out the actual email?
[00:05:33] What is how are you ever a paralegal? Yeah, dude wasn't it isn't the whole job like printing stuff and being like right away, Mr
[00:05:44] Coincin all have this printed up for you a sap in my experience being a paralegal was taking um
[00:05:50] Two-hour lunches at the at the white marsh chilies
[00:05:55] Mmm. That was a big part of mine. I would like to be a paralegal and my job is to watch movies all day
[00:06:03] I guess they're just never gonna open movie theaters again in here
[00:06:05] I'm gonna kill myself if that's the case. It's funny because it's like we had phases at one point
[00:06:11] Yeah, there's a whole phase thing and now they're like we're going to do what?
[00:06:18] Like the idea of everybody at home having gay sex if we were at home watching videos of me taking it raw
[00:06:28] Now one would miss the video the movies
[00:06:31] We wouldn't have to go to the movie place only go to the movies to watch me get my ass
[00:06:36] I painted my butt cheeks to look like spider-man's face
[00:06:41] And now he's sucking a cock upside down in the rain
[00:06:50] I'm not gonna talk bad about the governor anymore. Why did you worry about getting whacked? Yeah, dude
[00:06:56] I honestly it's gonna be funny try me Andy. I got the fucking Blicky on me right now be careful stuff
[00:07:02] Yeah, I don't want to I don't want anything happen. There is a chance
[00:07:05] I mean I feel like the governor is spiteful enough of word got back. It's a political machine state
[00:07:11] Yeah, it's family runs his family runs the state
[00:07:15] It could very easily get back to the governor and he's like I want these people killed
[00:07:20] No, he could say that we're doing BDS against Israel and then we are we are thrown in jail
[00:07:25] By the way, yeah, and I don't know what it stands for but against Israel. That's what I like to hear
[00:07:30] Yeah, it's bond by the way. Did you see did you see that they for some reason?
[00:07:36] Curious reason are not allowing you gondin Jews in to Israel
[00:07:40] What are you talking about and that's from you? They already did not crazy. They would also
[00:07:45] Forcefully sterilize them when they entered
[00:07:53] Earned on the Ethiopian Jews in like the 80s
[00:07:56] I thought now there's a whole all out black-ass type of Jew African like Jewish African migrants that come to Israel are forcibly sterilized
[00:08:04] Yeah, they try to do they try to do it's a real
[00:08:06] Apologist will tell you that that's a lie right and it's not
[00:08:14] Why is it called apologize apologize because they never apologize
[00:08:19] They never apologize for they excessively apologize. That's how they get away with everything. No, they never say I'm sorry
[00:08:29] Skinch of all the cost I need a doll up. Let me get the Holocaust
[00:08:41] Right out of your way, it's gonna be two seconds
[00:08:47] I'm gonna fire a little missile into this preschool and I will be right out of your head
[00:08:56] We're gonna do you want good movies don't you I just gonna get a little smidge of Ray doesn't make movies though
[00:09:04] No, they don't yeah, they do what oh they make all the movies is that one is really filmmaker didn't didn't
[00:09:16] Here's the thing they made all of his when Harvey Weinstein was we were a cone when Harvey Weinstein was making good movies
[00:09:22] He didn't need Israel to track down those women because we were so entertained by the man
[00:09:29] Wow well in my opinion. He never made good movies and I never liked him even before I knew he was canceled
[00:09:37] So it seems like you were a fan of him now. Why did he get that much credit from making the movie?
[00:09:42] He didn't make shit. Can I have the I suppose I suppose I will well that's like saying that
[00:09:49] That there's only one thing here. There's only one read so one page. It's a one page. Oh, you're buying way too thick paper
[00:09:55] I know dude. I'll get a thinner paper next time. I don't think it's that sick. I try to do a nice
[00:10:00] No, it is nice, but you're wasting money. No, I know who's fucking from Israel now. Yeah, I know you know I'm saying it
[00:10:06] Guses unreal Israel. I'm down toilet paper at his house. You should see it. This is coming out of the production
[00:10:12] No, it's not that's that's prior. I bought that privately and I had I'm not
[00:10:16] Invoicing you Adam's share of the Patreon money. Yeah
[00:10:21] Fun. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, but he makes his money back working as a secretary
[00:10:27] I don't like the dress code aspect of the secretary
[00:10:37] Once again, you got my ass my ass my ass has been caught my fellow Americans
[00:10:42] My ass has been fucked by the mojo. The mojo Dean have gotten my
[00:10:50] At not at zero nine hundred hours this morning the mojo Dean released a video calling me gay
[00:11:03] But let me just go back to the earlier point Adam and say I need an apology from your comments about my bike ride
[00:11:09] I apologize. Thank you. No, and I saw the amount of exertion. I have to do some more printing here also
[00:11:14] But you on three copies well, we're gonna need no now you're gonna have to find the other emails. I forward you
[00:11:21] You're gonna type up a little a little sheet a little
[00:11:29] Yeah, I got that because right away we need the promo code and we need to
[00:11:33] Highlighted the promo code the thing is is that you have to type in the URL
[00:11:37] I don't think they have a way to put a promo code in interesting
[00:11:40] It's a landing page and then I will also forward you or I probably already did
[00:11:46] The copy that was originally presented to us no it was a taste the copy is not
[00:12:02] Any of that 1940s attitude none of that fucking classic Adam night bull shit
[00:12:11] Just print out the name of the website the main couldn't have been clear and open up a document and we're gonna
[00:12:18] You're gonna make us the most beautiful copy we've ever seen it's gonna say
[00:12:23] Super og x a cratum company. It's the ice cream of the future
[00:12:29] And it's over there's over six billion served
[00:12:31] And they're all in heaven right now. They're all happy. They're all it's such a good time
[00:12:38] That they're dead and they're in heaven. Mm-hmm. And there's not a single I'll tell you it's I'm not I heard this
[00:12:44] I don't know if it's true. It's all white people up there. I
[00:12:51] But it's what I like to believe and that's what going to church is about is believing thing
[00:12:58] Damn a whole whole week of Joe Biden is the fucking president man. They're gonna hide him away
[00:13:10] Shouts out to have what is he what has he done so far? I don't know
[00:13:14] It's not some executive orders and that's the politics do what I
[00:13:20] Think so nothing's changed over here. I think you make when our
[00:13:23] Podcasters gonna move to the front of the vaccine line. That's what I want to know. I think you made this is 100% true
[00:13:30] And people should should know this but apparently Russians were behind the vaccine so Russian people were making it
[00:13:36] Mm-hmm, and so you can't do it if you're a liberal you might want to think twice about you know that vaccine
[00:13:42] Yep, in fact the Russians made the mass also
[00:13:46] Whoa and the fuck I really there's a secret memo from Putin that went to Trump that said boy
[00:13:51] You know it really steamed my beans if if a bunch of liberals in America put guns in their mouths and pulled the trigger
[00:13:59] He would be pissed off that would bother him. Yeah, so maybe try what size font do you want on this?
[00:14:09] I love you want to readable 12 is nice 12 is the 12
[00:14:13] I'll be honest with you 12 feels a little handicap to me. No, yeah, but we're doing a read we want a big
[00:14:20] I can read fine print very 13 is too big the smaller the font the faster I read
[00:14:33] I'm well. There's no the question doesn't make any oh wow. Do you hear this Adam? What?
[00:14:39] Minds faster it reminds me when it's smaller because it reminds him of his dick and he won't say
[00:14:54] That doesn't make sense what you just said doesn't make my statement was what I said makes sense was the quality of fastness
[00:15:01] Being expressed because that no no because that the letters aren't fast your ability to read is fast the thing can't be fucking
[00:15:11] um affected by the you know your dick your dick speed its size
[00:15:18] We're talking about size not quickness. Yeah quickness is one of the variables
[00:15:24] We're celebrating the anniversary of Christopher Reeves is passing. Oh all right p fell off the horse, right? I think I don't know
[00:15:31] He fell off the horse. No, it was paralyzed then died years later. Yeah, dude
[00:15:35] You don't remember that he was walking around or rolling around in the fucking chair passed away
[00:15:39] Yeah, he looked like shave. He's already look bad. Robin Williams and him went to fucking acting school together 16 years
[00:15:45] They were boys. That's why they're such similar actors the the acting school curse. Yep
[00:15:51] Well one killed himself one just got got by a fucking horse if you're a man and you're into horseback riding in a serious way for it
[00:15:58] That's kind of that's but it wasn't it wasn't just horseback riding. It was playing polo. Oh, he had mallets
[00:16:04] No, he was they were jumping over a fence and then the horse's legs got caught on the like I thought it was a pole horse was like
[00:16:16] And this is this is paralyzed a beloved cultural figure yeah speaking
[00:16:24] I saw a bam on Instagram said he's off all of the 25
[00:16:28] Prescriptions that he's been given in his skateboarding is back to normal again
[00:16:31] Should we try and get him back on the pod? So I just I wish and wishing the best of bam
[00:16:37] Absolutely wish him the best and let me just say brother open invite to get back on the podcast this time just us boys
[00:16:45] No, no, maybe good. No need for your family manager x and gene
[00:16:51] That was wild. There's just all these extra people that were there
[00:16:57] We should get stevo on to talk about vinnie because I guess he doesn't like vinnie
[00:17:02] Oh, really? So we want to get the stevo
[00:17:04] We should get stevo and vinnie and try to broker a piece of course stevo if you're out there listening to this right now
[00:17:14] Either you come on the show or you've made yourselves three
[00:17:21] We will staple your nuts to your penis not your not your eyes penis in real life actually
[00:17:37] Me and brandon or dell and jamell were walking down the street on sunset in l.a
[00:17:45] And then we and then cameras popped out and it was stevo tried to fill the new pranks video and he was wearing
[00:17:51] Bike spandex and then he had his penis out. That's also yeah, this is pretty funny. It was pretty how big is his cock
[00:17:57] Uh, I'm not sure if it was I mean it was that he his penis was painted the color of his like spandex
[00:18:04] So i'm not sure if maybe it was a fake penis, but i'm pretty sure it was his real penis
[00:18:07] It was like a pokahana song. Yeah, like the pokahana
[00:18:15] But you have a once your penis is exposed in the air though. I've seen you do before you close your eyes and you can smell exactly how big a cock
[00:18:22] That is true. Um some people say it's a blessing because of how gay you eyes. It's a curse
[00:18:35] Where exactly now adam we're coming up on the 20 minute mark here. Okay still haven't done your your little printing and typing
[00:18:41] You're really fucking up. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, I'm slow. Listen. I'm trying to because you know
[00:18:45] We've we vowed never to go in a minute over an hour anymore. So we have to hit our 20 minute mark
[00:18:58] All right, nik tell me what that looks like the time the typing that I did
[00:19:02] All right, and then you do you've typed up all the all the points
[00:19:05] No, I just typed up if this doesn't say nik is gay. You're not funny. Oh god
[00:19:11] Yeah, if you did your job for real, I thought you said you
[00:19:14] Oh my god, I know he says you wanted you didn't print a picture of a dick
[00:19:18] You didn't say fuck you nik. He printed yourself. That's what you would have done to be funny. Yeah, just awful
[00:19:24] Oh, what do you mean? That's just awful. That is just awful. I was a secretary for years. I don't know completely unprofessional
[00:19:30] It's unprofessional. It's not formatted nicely
[00:19:33] Mm-hmm. Even if you were trying to do a good job. You did a bad job. You did a bad job. You didn't do a funny job
[00:19:37] You didn't do it. Yeah, exactly the only two modes that are acceptable
[00:19:42] An office they lost sex sex you are you should have tried to get nik to say the n-word by printing it in there secretly
[00:19:49] Or something all right. I guess I was back to the drawing board here time to forward you more emails
[00:19:59] Oh, it's calling you skip. Oh, right my nickname. Yeah, which means captain
[00:20:07] Because it does like that was a gamble imagine being the nate because it has to go back to the 1800s where if you insulted the captain
[00:20:17] You would be putting a block of ice and left the there really was so much more decentralized total power in like the 1800s
[00:20:24] Like so many like barely powerful people could have you killed so easily. Yeah, whereas now it's I would say it's a little harder
[00:20:33] Yeah, you know what I mean? Like your boss can't rape you well, I guess that's the thing we really take for granted
[00:20:42] I mean for real women to have no idea how good they
[00:20:47] Or kill you or suck your dick against your will which is also rape I suppose all right super
[00:20:53] I think men were getting raped at a good clip back in the day as well
[00:20:59] Okay, not as much all right, okay, but that's the thing when women weren't in the workforce
[00:21:04] Somebody was getting raped so it was probably weaker men
[00:21:07] Mm-hmm. That's true. Yeah, they saved us weaker men the women the jail system
[00:21:13] All right. Okay, Adam. I sent you this one once you get all this copy typed up. We'll be able to actually start doing the episode
[00:21:19] Okay, we're not and then see I've been I've been distracted professionally and I can't I can't get into the
[00:21:26] Printing right up the clown zone. No, you better take that email and put the bullets in a new document
[00:21:34] In a new document with the right URL at the top so I can see it
[00:21:39] And oh now he's gonna try and do the joke if you do a joke now it's now it's
[00:21:44] I would be textbook at him the moment has passed
[00:21:49] And it's gonna be if you were a clown. I wouldn't hire you for a three-year-old
[00:21:59] I'm getting a spam risk from Franklinville, New York. Let's plug it in. Let's hear what they say
[00:22:10] Hey, hello, thanks. You're on the air. Hello. We can try to reach you concerning your vehicles extended warranty
[00:22:25] Hey, Eric. How about you suck my fucking dick pal
[00:22:29] Well, yeah, we're just guys. We're roasting this guy. This guy is getting destroyed
[00:22:35] What was that Eric? Oh, who's that? Can we speak to a rep?
[00:22:40] Can we speak to a guy with a bigger dick than you? Can we have sex with your wife?
[00:22:46] Maybe yeah, that's what I thought bitch
[00:22:48] Never fucking call here again. Okay. Well, that was that was a good one, dude. Yeah
[00:22:55] We're getting in that we're taking it we're taking it back to the
[00:23:05] Taking the power back to the people yes
[00:23:08] From the spam callers for yeah, absolutely
[00:23:11] If you're listening and you recognize that man's voice and you want to send his personal information yep
[00:23:16] To any of us. Well, we'll go ahead and we'll uh not look into it and uh, okay
[00:23:21] That's one of my favorite photographs printed a picture of Nick me and me and soda and soj
[00:23:31] Once again though the opportunity to do this was that was the first you should have done it the first time
[00:23:37] And now i'm going to print a picture of adam trying to stop printing don't print i'm gonna
[00:23:43] Struggling the bench press no don't print that picture adam struggle you promise 45
[00:23:48] No, it wasn't 45. It's a 45 pound bar and he was having trouble
[00:23:52] No, I was just doing that for the form just trouble. You racking. No, I was having trouble
[00:23:59] I was doing that for the form. I don't think so mate
[00:24:04] Okay, all right, that should be the bullet points coming up
[00:24:07] Well, i'll tell you what while you're waiting for the other read to be read maybe you can enjoy blue chu.com. No
[00:24:14] No, i'm sorry that I meant i'm having trouble with the printer to do it again
[00:24:18] Well, tell you what if you like sex you'll love blue chu.com. Oh, yeah blue chu.com offers men and performance enhancement for the bedroom
[00:24:27] Blue chu.com you get the first chewables with the active ingredients so then
[00:24:35] And you know why they make those so hard to pronounce. Yeah, I don't know they should have called them dick hardium
[00:24:40] That's because these are fake scientists. Yep, they came up with the dick pills and they're like they're they're feeling bad about themselves
[00:24:46] So they have to give their medicine like complicated names. Yeah, so they can feel cooler than i
[00:24:52] I say dick hardium and cocks diphnean name. Mm-hmm. That's what I would name them
[00:24:58] Chewables can work faster than the others because you can chew them up. Yeah
[00:25:02] Chewables from blue chu can be taken on a full or empty stomach
[00:25:06] Come or food you can eat come or food are you printing that Adam?
[00:25:12] What's going on with the printing? I don't know it's it's the
[00:25:18] Oh, there it is. Yeah. Yeah, that should be it. It's gonna be the same joke over and over. No, it's not that's gonna run
[00:25:25] We'll just gonna run out the clock. That should be the bullet points and you printed it sideways
[00:25:35] I just wanted I thought you get all the information
[00:25:38] What is this I look like I'm at a man like I'm at a menu restaurant. Yeah
[00:25:47] I look like what I'm Johnny McDonald's over here. Yeah, let me get the the beijon free. That's right
[00:25:54] Let me have the Beijing McDonald's let me have the the roasted
[00:26:03] And then I think we'll have some of the soy sauce
[00:26:07] That's right. I look like a freaking clown. Yeah, I look like an eating
[00:26:13] I didn't mean to humiliate you you honestly do never when I
[00:26:16] I know what the people can feel it. They know what it they know I'm humiliated
[00:26:21] Yeah, and they're they're feeling bad for me because everyone listens to show they identify with you. Yeah, it's true. I'm the most relatable
[00:26:33] Nice brother. Uh anyways blue chew blue chew is one of it's a wonderful drug if you have a fucked up penis
[00:26:40] For multiple reasons some you could be very fat
[00:26:44] That's me. You could be secretly gay. That's Nick
[00:26:47] You could be have incredibly low testosterone. That's me
[00:26:51] That's the only reason to be gay is because it's a secret. Yeah. Yeah, that's the fun. That's the appeal to me
[00:27:01] All these damn queers. That's why I'm that's why I'm against lgbt stuff because if you take away being secretly gay
[00:27:12] They used to be they used to be like James bond James
[00:27:15] Spence and they used to have very good art Richard Simmons, you know now we have fucking with
[00:27:21] Asa scary glitter whatever the fuck his name is
[00:27:23] Don't take litter was a pet of you know, it's a few minutes. You're a guy Randy glitter Gary Randy rainbow
[00:27:38] Chubles from blue chew calm can be taken on a full or empty
[00:27:42] You know, it takes a few minutes to connect with a blue chew calm affiliated physician
[00:27:46] And if you qualify you get prescribed online quickly
[00:27:49] Mm-hmm. No in-person doctor visit no awkward conversation though waiting in line at the pharmacy
[00:27:54] It ships directly to your door in discreet packaging very discreet packaging. It's got swastika's all over
[00:28:01] People are like this guy's a Nazi. Oh, it's this works fine. It's not a literature
[00:28:07] It's Mark Twain, but they put in more and worse
[00:28:12] It's the adventures of people Barry's the double it's not it's the double
[00:28:35] It's in a book that's in a book tom hollowed out all the dick pills are in that book Tom sare
[00:28:43] Yeah, and bleeple Barry bleep it comes over and he's like what you doing that fast Tom
[00:28:49] What should be what should be doing? He's I'm painting the end word on it
[00:29:00] Shit, I'm trying to get my dick stuff. I was like, well, why don't you paint the fence
[00:29:04] And then he did and then Tom yeah when he got some pussy on the side well that bitch
[00:29:11] That's awesome. That's a good book. Yeah, what also happens? Oh, I don't know. I've never read that gay bullshit
[00:29:19] You didn't you didn't read it in middle school? I did I tried to but it was fucking boring
[00:29:24] Well, I'll tell you what here's what's not boring getting your dick hard the no in-person doctor visit
[00:29:29] The game doing the video conference which Adam you have you have some experience zooming into the meeting
[00:29:35] Yeah, but you dot com to get your dick pills and getting confidence in bed every time you and your partner will love it
[00:29:41] You and do it. Here's a deal for your guys. We visit bluetooth.com your first order
[00:29:44] Free when you use promo code comtown just pay five dollars shipping. Mm-hmm. That's be I take them like vitamins
[00:29:51] I don't know if you're supposed to mm-hmm. I haven't had sex in months and I just take a
[00:29:55] dick pill every day to get my dick hard and to elevate my heart rate
[00:30:00] And so that's another way to and because it tastes like candy
[00:30:04] And so you know what you could do that too guys
[00:30:07] Yeah, I had honestly I did one time I took a dick pill and I fucked and then
[00:30:13] It sometimes it laughed the effects last a nice amount of time
[00:30:17] And I had a weird dream the next day about fucking an old lady
[00:30:21] And I woke up and I was just then my dream I was pounding this old bitch
[00:30:25] And you got pussy in there. I literally woke up. I'm not even joking humping my bed
[00:30:31] I was fucking my dick was like pushing into my bed and my and my dick was like pushed up on my stomach
[00:30:36] It kind of hurt. I had a cool dream that I was in like a defensive driving class and everyone was calling me an idiot
[00:30:44] No, and then a bunch of people got trapped under ice and I had to swim under the ice and save him
[00:30:50] And I was the only person that could do it which you and your dick was hard from blue cheese
[00:30:59] Well, thanks for recovering the bodies at least damn well you got half of them. That's pretty
[00:31:03] Were you wearing scuba gear where you just I was just I just went in damn bro
[00:31:07] They're like if anyone else does it they'll die they'll die but not you know you have been talking about cold showers
[00:31:13] Yeah, exactly. You've been talking about cold waters swimming too. I want to do I want to go to brighten and do the let's go
[00:31:19] Dude, I got my wetsuit. All right. I need somebody to because if you you can just die
[00:31:24] I'm not interested in that. You do it wrong if you just go in there and you don't like I would probably die
[00:31:29] You know, you're not gonna die from a polar bear plunge, bro
[00:31:32] No, if you don't if you just don't I mean if you jumped in the water that probably fuck you up
[00:31:37] Walking out there. No, you got a jump. Yeah, you got a jump
[00:31:40] You just got you gotta bring a shit ton of cigarettes so you can warm up at ya get your lungs fucking hot
[00:31:46] Yeah, you gotta you gotta you gotta you gotta take a big ass bone rip and then jump
[00:31:51] Yeah, nothing makes me get me hotter. So use blue chew calm promo code comtown just pay five dollar shipping
[00:31:57] That's bl you eat shoe calm promo code comtown
[00:32:10] And oh, I know that one from the candy. Yeah, yeah, yeah
[00:32:25] That's the only one they tell you how to spell phonetically
[00:32:27] Mm-hmm interesting. Yeah, just calling up
[00:32:32] See is in no, no, no, no, I'm not you wouldn't have to do this everyone can figure out where this bit is going at
[00:32:40] But if you're new to the show, I think you could probably also figure it out
[00:32:45] If you they would be funny if somebody started listening like right now. They're like this is jacked up
[00:32:59] From the voice and he's got an awesome way. He's got a suck his cock sounds physically overheated
[00:33:04] No, he said that he had to remove his clothes and 15 degree
[00:33:08] First of all, I'm wearing long. I'm wearing heat gear leggings. Thank you very much. So I'm hot
[00:33:13] I'm running hot from the bottom. So I'm letting a little steam off up top damn leggings remind me of the woods
[00:33:20] Yeah, I wish I wish we were still we're gonna go back. This show is gonna become a vacation show
[00:33:24] Yeah, we're gonna go on four vacations a year do all the episodes
[00:33:29] We should have they should give us look if guys grow if diners drive ins and dives can be on the air for
[00:33:35] Now I think at this point 37 years, I'm pretty sure that's true
[00:33:38] Then there's no reason that we can't have I would love to have a travel log show
[00:33:43] And they're like we're here at McDonald's. Yeah, and we're here at the pizza place right by the cabin that we got
[00:33:49] We're at we're at the McDonald's in fucking
[00:33:54] Delaware the only one where you're allowed to smoke inside
[00:33:58] Sir, can you put that out please shut up?
[00:34:02] After telling the bitch to shut up we continued smoking
[00:34:08] And eating some pbj's we brought from home eating peanut butter and giant s sandwiches
[00:34:13] Oh, yeah, that's a yummy stuff Adam why the fuck isn't the URL on this copy on the make the main the menus
[00:34:28] Well, if you put the one the fucking sucked bro. Look. I'm trying why do we need two pages look at this dude
[00:34:34] I'm trying to read this and it's I'm sorry dude. I think you take a break take a breather dude
[00:34:45] That was mark twaining me into having to do more work than I want
[00:34:50] Twaining you so fucked. I just printed it in landscape hamburger size
[00:34:54] Same thing my boy Sammy go pussy the man who prints sideways is known to have a small dick. Yep, but if that wasn't enough
[00:35:07] You know, not just very funny, but also very insightful
[00:35:11] And they had some great views on the jewish people uh a link and it was said that link in new Adam
[00:35:22] Yeah, it's Shelby foot in the civil war documentary. Oh, well. Yeah, shut that door boy. Shelby
[00:35:30] A lot of people think Shelby is a gay name
[00:35:32] Because your girl's name you would often tease me about it and I would always say to them
[00:35:37] Actually, it's Adam. That's your girl's name
[00:35:40] And they would say that's true. There are a lot of atoms that are not girl
[00:35:46] Most of them. Yeah, I'm saying there's cool. Who else Adam Adam West Batman. Adam West is okay. Adam driver Adam driver
[00:35:55] I can take your leave Adam driver. I don't mind him
[00:35:58] I know it's cool to not like him. Is it cool? A lot of people are like he's ugly. Don't say he's cute
[00:36:05] No, I think he's cute. I think he could get his I think he could lay some pipe. Yeah, I'm just saying
[00:36:10] You know, I want to rewatch Star Wars on mushrooms, man
[00:36:13] It's very bad if you know take it back on mushrooms. I don't know. It's awesome on mushrooms
[00:36:19] I've never seen the u1 without mushrooms and by the way, the old one's not that good
[00:36:23] Which ones I don't know every watch them. They weren't they every watch the empire was not that good. Yeah, everyone knows revenge to the set the best one
[00:36:35] I think it's like there's like oh, I love revenge of the sith in the in the movie theater
[00:36:38] I think one is revenge of this. I think it's part three. That's the last one of the two prequels. Oh, yeah, I'm I'm due for
[00:36:46] Getting fucked up and watching all of those movies and passing out 10 minutes into the first
[00:36:50] Yeah into the potter a sink. You know what I want to do. I've never seen Lord of the Rings. I want to take mushrooms and watch Lord of the Rings
[00:36:56] It's not good. I don't think I've tried a I've tried a billion times to be like you know what?
[00:37:01] I'm doing it. I'm getting a fucking bag of a pizzeria pretzel combos respect
[00:37:05] I'm taking some pill family size. I hope and yes, and then also muddy buddy checks
[00:37:11] Oh, buddy, buddy's bro. Oh, man. That is the good that's just got me happy doing a couple of lines of blow
[00:37:23] Snorting ketamine. Yeah doing percusset. Yeah. Now. I'm ready to understand. Now you're at art
[00:37:34] To be a guy that hasn't had a drink in it
[00:37:42] To be ready to get up down up up down down and up in middle and be regular
[00:37:49] Really just take all that stuff and just be in the middle
[00:37:52] Don't you feel like when you take mushrooms and you look at the mirror you look like an elf?
[00:37:56] When I take when I've done ketamine in the past and I've looked in the mirror
[00:38:02] Because it's dissociative my face. It's dissociative will turn. I hate my face
[00:38:06] So all like just different discrete components. So it's I hate it
[00:38:09] You're looking at it. It's just like eyes and a nose and a mouth and shit
[00:38:14] Maybe you're gonna just sort of like placed on your head. Yeah, it's like a mister potato head style
[00:38:20] It really hurts by feeling yeah, you can't look at a mirror
[00:38:23] Maybe you sent us a really ugly picture this morning. You looked hideous. I know I thought we were all sitting ugly
[00:38:28] Wait, we were saying good. We looked good, but you look like a good
[00:38:33] You look like you just get like went through a difficult labor and
[00:38:42] I thought we were all sending you just a little pics from bed a man looking down at this woman
[00:38:46] Look how disgusting that I guess this bitch gave me a son
[00:38:50] Yeah, why you guys should never be able to fuck this woman?
[00:38:52] No, I'm looking at it for us. This is you after a difficult they had to do a cesarean
[00:38:58] I thought you did blow your pussy out. I've been trying to get it out first
[00:39:01] You're pulling out and then they had to then they're like, oh, they still get back in the c-section
[00:39:06] Oh, you really think my picture was ugly at him? No, I thought we were all sending each other bedroom photograph
[00:39:11] I wasn't as dead. I was sitting at my table doing work. I'm fucking up in the morning
[00:39:15] Food war for talking about both. I was just sending emails working on some projects
[00:39:19] I get up at 7 a.m. Every day. You're snoozing like a fucking bitch. Yeah
[00:39:25] Looking bad looking dehydrated on there how to print stuff out like an asshole Wikipedia page
[00:39:29] Listen, I'm in the middle of the mood. What's the most asshole way to print stuff?
[00:39:33] You actually like nice. You know your skin your skin looks really good
[00:39:37] Say something nice about me too. Thank you Nick. I like that spit tool on your lip. It's coffee
[00:39:44] Coffee. Yeah, my skin also look spittle your skin does look good. My skin is pretty
[00:39:49] Your skin is good right now. Thank you Adam. You're welcome
[00:39:53] I told you that my skin gets dried out when I don't use my dandruff shampoo enough
[00:39:59] Is that so the right have something called dermatitis and the central column of my face
[00:40:05] Drives out. Okay. Yeah, I'm spray-matizing. I'm trying to do a medical
[00:40:10] Uh fucking well, you know what absolutely cure
[00:40:14] Dermotitis 100% guaranteed by the FDS. Yeah, and we're allowed to make that clear legally
[00:40:20] Uh, we don't know what that is, but we know it's something that's drinking calm. We'll do that
[00:40:25] But no something that can't cure anything, but it's nice pretty cool. It's very uh, hold on
[00:40:32] Yeah, see this and this is what you need to fix
[00:40:35] This needs to not be at this I specifically the problem
[00:40:38] I was wrong with landscape the the whole point of this. Okay, so that I don't very easily readable thing
[00:40:45] Yeah, you have made the least accessible if everything is small. This is the problem small
[00:40:49] You said this is the problem wins in print is the fucking where it says due to FDA regulations
[00:40:55] We're not legally permitted to state that our sub don't don't say it
[00:41:00] Don't say that comes after the first line that says it is very helpful for and I can't you need you need this
[00:41:06] Got bolded next time. No, don't just take this fucking line out and put the FDA regulations thing first
[00:41:15] We already dismissed the other we know you need the other paper because that is the promo code. I'm getting hot
[00:41:20] Okay, I'm sorry. I'm getting where's the other paper. I'll tell you right now
[00:41:24] I'm getting you the other paper. This is we better go to this product lunch after this. All right. I'm buying
[00:41:30] There better be a nice. No, it's my week to boy stops. We can buy I'll buy it like I buy it every time
[00:41:35] No, I bought last week. No, this is what the FDA wants us to say I took us out in our in my my
[00:41:40] Cadillac in your 57 Chevy. Yeah, should I get a big Cadillac? Yeah, absolutely. Just for going to lunch. Yes
[00:41:51] Intended this product is not intended to
[00:41:58] Is a look if you already fuck with cratum then ignore what we're gonna say and just go to get super leaf
[00:42:08] Okay for 20 percent off your next order get super leaf dot com slash comtown
[00:42:14] 20 percent off your next order now this product is not intended to diagnose treat cure prevent any disease
[00:42:22] So we none of that shit, but I will say it's nice
[00:42:25] I like it and you should buy it if this is intended to be nice
[00:42:29] I don't know if this you're allowed to say this, but it definitely fucks you up
[00:42:37] Recommended doses in a pinch where you can't get fucking pills. Yeah, check this shit out because it is most definitely a drug
[00:42:47] But it's legal for the time being there is a loophole that allows you to buy it over the fucking
[00:42:52] You can internet except for in some backwards say like Alabama except for that bullshit where they might where's that fucking fan bitch
[00:43:08] What separates them from their competitors the most creative brands are manufactured and really poor conditions bullshit naked
[00:43:15] Grawaj naked Guatemalan ladies with their titties out so they can't steal anything. Yeah, like yeah, yeah
[00:43:26] Sometimes these are home-based businesses selling products out of their garage
[00:43:33] Cratum on the market has potentially unsafe levels of bacteria
[00:43:41] Guys Cox I'm legitimately having trouble reading this
[00:43:43] I'm struggling to read so can I read I could read it you've going on go ahead and read it
[00:43:50] Pass me the paper you don't know how to read you got a pass me the paper and then I can read it
[00:43:54] You're in third grade read in fifth grade
[00:43:57] I try to put the laptop away. No reading
[00:44:03] Okay, listen, I worry about in gravy stick bubble gum in your face and fuck you in the end
[00:44:12] That's gross things like Salmonella E. coli and mold are common. Oh, I hate all that shit
[00:44:18] Yeah, I fucking hate it. Yeah, and that's you can only get that kind of stuff. It's super. No, no, no
[00:44:24] No, you don't get that's that's the competitors. Yes. That's cool that you get to say that imagine
[00:44:29] We did a read for Burger King. They're like did you know McDonald's is filled with dog shit?
[00:44:36] We pasteurize our cratum which means they put in the microwave. Yeah
[00:44:44] They just buzz in the mic real quick, you know, and that is clean and then our creative and then test vigorous vigorous
[00:44:52] rigorously to protect our customers we meet the American crater
[00:44:55] Oh, yeah, you read an awful laptop not a fucking fucked up piece of paper
[00:44:59] It's smaller here than it is on that. I don't think so. Yes, it is
[00:45:02] I don't think so at all we meet the American Cratum Association standards for quality verified by third party audit and our
[00:45:15] Dogs yeah dogs American Kennel is the American cranium association. There's a video intro to their brand
[00:45:21] Is that there's there's should we play the video intro aka also a black lace or American Kennel Association the logo
[00:45:28] It's it's like a cat an Asian guy wearing a ten-gallon hat
[00:45:44] Some of the most delicious delicious dogs you've ever seen usd a state that's a Andrew Yang's America
[00:45:52] That's what we're looking forward to you when he becomes president. Yep. He's a real New Yorker
[00:45:57] Mmm. Oh, it's so funny that Shane got fired for saying chank on his show and then Andrew Yang was like
[00:46:04] I'd like to reach out to Shane and we can talk about saying chank. Yeah, and then they took they spoke on the phone
[00:46:10] Shane said he was like, hey, he's cool. Yeah. He's cool. He's cool. He's just a fucking done. Well, I'm just saying it's like a wild
[00:46:18] Series of events to happen. So you should you're trying to get Andrew Yang trying to get a phone call from I'm trying to have a fucking position
[00:46:24] In the Andrew Yang mayor's office because he will be mayor of New York. Yep. I don't think so. No, you know
[00:46:30] Who's putting him there is he's yin ping. That's true. He's being installed
[00:46:36] Okay, they are these guys the cratum guys are passionate about what they do and they view cratum as something that
[00:46:43] That one day can help just as many people as cannabis does get super leaf.com slash come town
[00:46:48] The stories they hear 20 customers are absolutely incredible people are able to ditch their prescriptions with cratum and lead a healthier more
[00:46:57] Productive life. They sent a link to how to pronounce super speciosa
[00:47:08] About they link to this dick and balls just make sure the fucking check clear special
[00:47:16] We give it fuck how you pronounce it Spechie also, what would be super mentions you's Italian, right? It's awesome
[00:47:41] The research shows that Cratum interacts with the opioid receptors, but in a much safer
[00:47:44] way, significantly lower risk of dependence and respiratory depression.
[00:47:49] Respiratory depression is what causes people to die from opioid overdoses.
[00:47:53] So good news, it's significantly lower of a risk than heroin.
[00:48:04] It is a, you have a much less chance of dying of a cratum over those.
[00:48:16] This is significant giving the opioid epidemic we face as a country.
[00:48:20] If you or anyone on your team has any interest, you can skim through this presentation recently
[00:48:32] He figured out how it was possible for her to fuck sex with Andre Drummond.
[00:48:38] And she is a leading creative researcher in the university of Florida.
[00:48:43] From just a scientific standpoint, would like to see his dick go into her pussy from
[00:48:49] I might have been trying to jack off to that necessarily.
[00:48:51] Anyway, what are you trying to jack off to make girls with big tits sucking dick, getting
[00:48:57] Your girls with big tits sucking dick or honestly, what I'd like to jack off to is after I send
[00:49:06] the picture of my dick to a girl, she says, wow, that looks nice and then sends me a picture
[00:49:16] It feels like a really nice like boost to have a girl look at your dick and say that looks
[00:49:24] Really all I want to do is be in the woods and child firewood.
[00:49:31] I want to go on some kind of training montage.
[00:49:34] I feel like I'm in a training montage part of my life.
[00:49:41] I'm an imagine if I had a big ass bird on my arm and it's sitting there on the glove
[00:49:47] and Adam prints something off wrong in the bird and the bird just fucking pips his
[00:49:52] eye out tears his face off and then it flies back over the two feet that flies.
[00:49:59] I just saw a slow and lands on my arm and I say good boy.
[00:50:15] You're bleeding all over the place and I'm like, could you, could we please do the show?
[00:50:29] Don't anything he has to say has nothing to do with you.
[00:50:40] It's very refreshing to have somebody do his job around here.
[00:50:43] A little tiny microphone that goes to the bird's mouth and we just put it to be slowly
[00:50:48] turn Adam's levels down and Eric's up as we replace Adam with the show falcon.
[00:51:00] We'll put a little bit of an order on this.
[00:51:03] And a little tiny scroll over his foot.
[00:51:05] That'd be cool if we pitched the Silicon Valley.
[00:51:15] We pitch a delivery app, but it's all done by Falcon Ring.
[00:51:22] No, every restaurant would have a falcon.
[00:51:24] We have to bring over Indian falcons that were doctors in their country.
[00:51:29] And they're like, where I lived, they would have me do a face surgery on the uglyest
[00:51:38] And now I come here and I do Uber Eats.
[00:51:48] I like the idea that yeah, he's doing the surgery with his beak.
[00:51:53] Packing her a big ass nose, making it smaller.
[00:51:56] You're watching pre-thiemake over on Bravo.
[00:52:01] All of the good doctors in India have moved to America to work for Uber Eats.
[00:52:11] Hopefully this falcon could make my wife's teeth bigger.
[00:52:15] The food of the falcons are laying eggs in their breasts.
[00:52:26] You have to put the eggs in there and crack them.
[00:52:29] So the details become juicy but crunchy.
[00:52:35] That is honestly a thing I would not want in a breast.
[00:52:41] Maybe over time, don't people put eggshells on their hair or some shit?
[00:52:51] Doesn't eggshells have some fucking kind of nutrients?
[00:53:03] I feel like eggshells people claim have a lot of fucking properties.
[00:53:08] So maybe it would be fine if it dissolves into the titty.
[00:53:11] I tried a new mushroom the other day that apparently is supposed to help your brain.
[00:53:31] Let me look that up because I've been getting into mushrooms recently.
[00:53:50] I just sauteed it with a little bit of garlic.
[00:53:51] I did a dry saute because it has a lot of water come out of it.
[00:53:57] And then I put it in a little bit of...
[00:54:00] Extra version and then a little bit of garlic.
[00:54:09] Mmm, why read the Wikipedia page for the movie Gravity.
[00:54:26] Sandra Bullock's armpit should have not been shaved.
[00:54:33] What do you talk about eight years ago?
[00:54:36] Yeah, something I was pissed off about.
[00:54:38] The biggest flaw in the movie The Me is where there are two astronauts already in space.
[00:54:44] Working on the satellite and George Clooney floats up and he's like, so what are you doing
[00:54:53] Yeah, she doesn't even want to be there.
[00:54:54] Well, the real biggest issue with the movie is that this is supposed to be a person that's
[00:55:00] been immobilized after the death of their child.
[00:55:07] Like I haven't really been able to do anything since much somehow.
[00:55:11] Except becoming an astronaut would go to space.
[00:55:20] And maybe you should see a little pussy here coming out of the side of the room.
[00:55:25] The space shoot because space is a vacuum.
[00:55:30] So there's really no reason a female astronaut should have the suit covering any part of the
[00:55:35] Well, that's how black holes are logically speaking.
[00:55:37] They're pussy should be completely exposed.
[00:55:39] Reverses the gravitational rays of space.
[00:55:44] They put them in the suit and the pussy sucking up all the air from the male astronauts.
[00:55:49] That's why George Clooney died in that movie.
[00:55:51] Listen, you're going to have to seal your pussy.
[00:55:54] One of it either your pussy dies or either.
[00:55:59] It's oh man, always have to sacrifice themselves for women.
[00:56:04] How cool would it be if you remade Titanic and fucking Jack made that bitch Rose sink?
[00:56:10] The movie is about an old man that got pussy.
[00:56:13] And then he's like, he started selling a different story immediately about a different girl.
[00:56:21] Rose is like four minutes of the movie.
[00:56:33] And then I always see his where always see his or kids.
[00:56:37] And then that's the whole part he remembers.
[00:56:45] She could have been on one of the rich people, but that's how you know I had good ass dick.
[00:56:51] Anyway, as soon as I got back on land, I fucked this Puerto Rican.
[00:56:54] But yeah, and we didn't even have now we got him all over the place back then.
[00:57:00] I thought I was going to have to fuck this Galapagos turtle.
[00:57:03] And the big titty natives came out of the forest.
[00:57:16] This is Jack remembering all of us he got.
[00:57:34] It's literally just him narrating and all the like flashbacks are hardcore porn.
[00:57:51] That was like, if you're an artist, I used to carry a guitar around.
[00:57:57] And honestly, they don't know this, but I would draw the the naked shit.
[00:58:03] And then I would just have to fucking fuck up their face.
[00:58:06] I took a picture of her naked while she was sleeping and then I just traced it.
[00:58:13] He didn't have revenge porn laws back up.
[00:58:23] You rip your shirt off while she was asleep.
[00:58:26] Take a picture and then you trace him and then they think you're an artist.
[00:58:29] They show it to all their friends and they're like, I can't wait to get pussy from this
[00:58:40] Put Leonardo DiCaprio in fucking prosthetic makeup.
[00:58:43] Just halfway through his echolice and you got to fuck my friend for breezy.
[00:58:46] I was like, you got to have to get my friend for breezy.
[00:59:02] For breezy, just fattish shit sitting next to him in the chair next to him.
[00:59:07] I'm coming with him to get some pussy also.
[00:59:12] Where are the dumb movies where Ben have to sacrifice themselves for what?
[00:59:22] As long as we're remaking everything, just read for guys.
[00:59:25] Yeah, you don't even have to change the pendulum swings both ways.
[00:59:31] You make the guy version of a girls movie, but this time you do actually switch some fucking
[00:59:37] Instead of it just being the guy version of Yaya's sisterhood.
[00:59:43] Because that would just be a movie for gay men.
[00:59:51] The sister, the Yaya's sisterhood is smiling.
[00:59:54] You should see that movie itself because it takes place in the Greek islands.
[01:00:03] No, you're talking about Mona Lisa's smile, dude.
[01:00:06] Stop trying to take shots before I send a bird.
[01:00:10] I don't want some of the before Eric comes at you.
[01:00:13] The pain that Eric would inflict from his talons would not hurt as much as the pain of
[01:00:19] you making a new friend and ditching me for some sort of bird.
[01:00:29] You're jealous of a fucking animal dude?
[01:00:46] The only reason we're friends is the only reason you're on this show is because you have
[01:01:15] Maybe we should do another read just for money.
[01:01:28] Everyone knows why we just talked about driving a car.
[01:01:33] That's why Tesla is invented a car that runs purely on batteries.
[01:01:57] Can you imagine how much criticism she would face if Elon Musk was a woman?
[01:02:06] She wouldn't be allowed to have that much money.
[01:02:15] I'm trying to throw up on the mic, but I can't.
[01:02:21] I can't start because people get mad if we eat on the mic.
[01:02:25] What if we started throwing up on the mic?
[01:02:36] People getting mad red scare for me doing Bellini on the show.
[01:02:55] We've patched up our friendships with them and by we, I mean me.
[01:03:01] Well, I went to a New Year's party featuring Anna.
[01:03:05] We had a good time before people started spreading rumors about some kind of intro show animosity.
[01:03:24] I watched the movies in the war of weights.
[01:03:28] Anyway, I watched the movies Jack this weekend where Robin Williams is an adult, but a boy.
[01:03:35] And yeah, it's pretty absurd how hot his mom is.
[01:03:42] Diane Lane peak 10 of 10 Diane Lane like the perfect Diane Lane.
[01:03:53] It was, I don't know, something that was put on at maybe 2.30 AM.
[01:04:03] But it is kind of, I do want to like program a film festival where I play that and Clifford
[01:04:10] and there's one other movie that a dion Lane's got some nice tees.
[01:04:19] She gets fucked in that movie unfaithful with Richard G.
[01:04:44] I just heard there's some fucking website like Jerusalem estates.
[01:04:52] And for whatever reason, like their fucking ads, but they, these fucking, these guys,
[01:04:58] these shisters, they put something in like the code of their ads.
[01:05:01] So if you're scrolling on a website, it stops scrolling when you hit their ad.
[01:05:06] Oh, and I've accidentally clicked on their ad like a hundred times.
[01:05:11] But when you block it, like the only way to block an individual website on the iPhone,
[01:05:15] you have to like block all adult content.
[01:05:21] I'm watching something that people have.
[01:05:32] We should do an entire episode of shit clapped.
[01:05:35] We should do an entire episode where we're all just watching different porn or individual
[01:06:00] This is this is the scene from Unfaithful.
[01:06:19] Fran Drescher, like, plays his friend's mom who wants to fuck him.
[01:06:28] It's one of the worst movies with some of the hottest women in the entire.
[01:06:31] Some of the nicest pieces of pussy pie.
[01:06:33] The nicest pieces of pussy in the entire world.
[01:06:41] Listen, guys, if you haven't gotten a Stobby Baby calendar yet, we've got a discount running
[01:07:01] Now we've over corrected to the other way.
[01:07:06] And Stobby.biz, there's T-shirts available at com.town.
[01:07:11] It's the official podcast merch that you can wear.
[01:07:23] Well, I'm on the podcast and it's officially my...
[01:07:38] I just want to announce today I am starting an app.
[01:07:44] You can talk to other Adam Friedland fans.
[01:07:47] Kind of like Jeremy Renner tried to do last year.
[01:07:53] I'll get in the Google Play Store and the iTunes Store.
[01:08:21] That does seem like the way a weird poly person would say come over to have sex.
[01:08:29] Those are the worst people in the world.
[01:08:39] Yeah, putting that guy's hair in your pussy.
[01:08:50] If you are tired of the lack of quality and the regular episode.
[01:09:01] We're fired up and I've been saying slurs under my breath.
[01:09:05] Playing the penis game with slurs is the way to repurchase.
[01:09:09] And then I'm in what they call the goofball.
[01:09:12] It's too cold to eat outside though, right?
[01:09:21] All your clothes got sucked into the electric license.
[01:09:26] I was wearing a fucking jacket and a hoodie and a shirt.
[01:09:30] That's why and I was doing vigorous exercise, which even though some haters will say it's
[01:09:46] Let me just say that I fucking, even though it was an electric bike, let me pull up my
[01:09:50] fucking Fitbit right now and say, you know, I burned up.
[01:09:57] So it's like you had, you only had 10,000 calories.
[01:10:10] Oh, that includes your like, your lumberjack breakfast.
[01:10:20] I have 26 zone minutes in the fat burn zone.
[01:10:25] I love to hear you that you're in the fat burn zone.
[01:10:30] There's one thing that's amazing about those Fitbits is that you see those numbers and
[01:10:35] it definitely has a correlation with your, what you actually look like.
[01:10:39] Again, I will, the hate rules down my back.
[01:10:44] No, because, and let me just say, because the same slant is a stomach one.
[01:10:51] That's because I'm not affected by you small people.
[01:10:56] If you were, if Adam, Nick, for example, if you started, this, look, first of all, my
[01:11:01] criticism is directed towards big tech, not big people.
[01:11:06] I don't think, I have, you have a well documented problem with the overweight.
[01:11:12] Only because stemming from your own traumatic, your mother, your mother, your mother, your
[01:11:21] If you were, if you were doing some, what I say to you, if you were doing a little bit
[01:11:25] of mental health, if you did a little meditation, what I say, you're a fucking piece of shit.
[01:11:39] If you were keeping a game stopping point.
[01:11:45] I said that doesn't sound accurate in regards to your Fitbit.
[01:11:48] I would have liked some fucking positivity.
[01:11:54] I've always supported you every step of the way.
[01:11:59] And when there was one thing you should do.
[01:12:05] You should get rid of the Fitbit and you should exercise because it makes you feel good and
[01:12:08] you'll establish a more healthy relationship with exercise rather than one dictated by
[01:12:17] I'm going to get an apple on your data.
[01:12:22] You have an apple watch and you're always talking about macros.
[01:12:29] Macros are, they turn into calories but it's also among the other end of the spec.
[01:12:40] You know, you need to be mindful of macros and stuff when you're in the window of 8% to
[01:12:44] maybe 12% body fat because then it's a down to a fine science.
[01:13:04] To be honest with you, I can never tell how much you weigh.
[01:13:06] My memory of my memory of you when we first met was that you were 700.
[01:13:19] I remember you not having like articulated knees.
[01:13:34] I do get, I do get pretty fucking wobbly.
[01:13:40] And then I've since then though, because I remember you losing weight and then I probably
[01:13:42] since you lost your hair, I've just thought of you as a bald person.
[01:13:53] And all you can do is look at how fat I am.
[01:13:59] Oh man, I didn't gossip about always constantly.
[01:14:01] I think as soon as you leave, it's like stops up 10 pounds.
[01:14:08] I've installed secret scales in the floor.
[01:14:12] You haven't seen any girl on the floor?
[01:14:14] I had one of those like those memories.
[01:14:19] Because iCloud memories pop up from when we went to DC in like 2018.
[01:14:28] And you look like literally maybe a quarter of the size you are now.
[01:14:31] I was much, that was right before I heard my foot.
[01:14:37] Well I don't know if it was right before.
[01:14:40] That might have been the only off the beaten path restaurant that I've ever taken the boys
[01:14:45] That was a smash where I was given a compliment.
[01:14:49] Like do you want to go to this holiday in?
[01:14:50] I know there's an off of New York Avenue.
[01:15:01] And you immediately started gaining weight after that.
[01:15:06] It was the Skankfest basketball tournament.
[01:15:08] And which one of your friends said, Stav, you should tear your plan or fashion at the
[01:15:18] So me, just worried about which device you happen to be using.
[01:15:29] So we could do walkie talkies or we could do walkie.
[01:15:36] The bullion man into being able to use the walkie talkie.
[01:15:42] And then as soon as Adam gets an Apple Watch, they're going in the trash.
[01:15:55] Yeah, you kind of have tiny wrists, actually.
[01:15:57] You're insecure about your small wrists.
[01:16:06] It's a pain in the ass to use the buttons.
[01:16:11] I can't imagine it would be more comfortable.
[01:16:13] Well, certainly not easier, but I feel like the smaller one would be unusable.
[01:16:17] I don't know, I'm just used to the little ass foot bit.
[01:16:22] Anyway, where are we going to eat, man?
[01:16:39] What I'm saying is let's get barbecued.
[01:16:47] Can we just go buy some seafood and I'll broil it?
[01:16:50] I mean, go to the store, yeah, if you want to.
[01:16:57] Yes, I would love to do that, actually.
[01:16:58] Let's get some barbecue and watch for the...
[01:17:01] Well, me in the middle, we're going to get a smoker and smoke a salmon from 40.
[01:17:11] I love to warm my apartment, fill it with some nice smoked juices.
[01:17:14] I don't know why, but I would love to cut your head off with a machete.
[01:17:23] Your head would look funny on a big green smoker.
[01:17:27] We did kind of like a Rwandan genocide view.
[01:17:32] You know, just left your head in the middle of some dirt road somewhere.
[01:17:43] All right, well, I'm glad we're back to normal.
[01:17:45] You guys also haven't noticed that I've been wearing lifts this entire episode.
[01:17:52] To fix my posture, I've bought elevator lifts.
[01:17:55] Those are the fucking gay shoes I've ever seen in my life.
[01:18:06] How does that fix your pilgrim shoes, dude?
[01:18:17] Apparently, people in the restaurants and people that are on their feet a lot where dance
[01:18:23] So I've gotten them as my in-the-house shoes.
[01:18:26] But you're sitting down almost constantly.
[01:18:33] No, I'm walking from living room to bedroom to bathroom, back to kitchen.
[01:18:40] That's what people in restaurants wear.
[01:18:44] Well, yeah, you got to get used to them.
[01:18:46] But it would look like fucking dumb ass shoes.
[01:19:02] Oh, Adams Deal Corner, Paragon Sports, if you're in the New York City area is doing
[01:19:07] a massive sale because they're downsizing their store.
[01:19:12] Well, they're, I guess, selling on fucking sucks.
[01:19:20] And also too, it's like until like fucking three years ago there was modell...
[01:19:27] You've got to go to Mose, but you can't anymore.
[01:19:30] We used to have Sports Authority and City Sports.
[01:19:32] We had Sports Authority, City Sports, Modell's.
[01:19:37] Not that I can think of it, but it's just like straight up.
[01:19:42] I used to go to Hollabird Sports over and off.
[01:19:47] I don't know if there's a Dix in the city.
[01:19:58] I used to love shooting hoops on the hoops inside of Sports Authority.
[01:20:03] What's that seafood market around here?
[01:20:09] That's not a market that's just a restaurant.
[01:20:34] I said before I move, I want to go there one time.
[01:20:39] It's probably all filled with mold and slime and snakes and shit.
[01:20:44] And we can still all the fucking new ones.
[01:20:46] We can do more on the supposed Katrina David Foster.
[01:20:47] We should go to Chuck E. Cheese for the pizza, dude.