Cum Town | Regular | 04/28/2021
[00:00:00] Are you say that again? I'm ready to have my ass fucked by you Star Wars.
[00:00:05] Sir yes sir. Wow dude are you fucking serious?
[00:00:10] Wait we're recording? Suspect alert. Come on bro. You can't. Mr. Soss. Full tiny penis.
[00:00:16] Full tiny penis. The FTP market? Yeah. God damn it. Friedlin. What is wrong with your
[00:00:23] dick? I've never seen a dick so small. Last week we did the Simpsons. We did do the
[00:00:32] Simpsons. I'm not as familiar as Stanley Cooper. Oh the cubic universe? Yeah. Okay.
[00:00:39] It's a bunch of monkeys. I'm very Linden and your dick is small. Oh that's my fault.
[00:00:44] I'm going to have a bunch of monkeys like in the desert looking at a very small dick
[00:00:49] coming out of the ground. A tiny metal penis. Yeah yeah they can't even see it. Yeah. They're
[00:00:54] squinting really hard. All the monkeys their eyes explode because they're trying to see
[00:00:59] your penis coming out of the ground. Yeah. Bum bum bum bum.
[00:01:07] Adam. I swear to you. Smell. Yeah just Shelley Deval horrified looking at a piece of paper
[00:01:14] on a typewriter that just says Adam's dick is small. It's scary. Small dick. That's
[00:01:22] there. Make Jack go crazy. Um yeah. What's the little dick smell backwards? My name is
[00:01:32] Adam's dick. My name is Adam's dick and I'm small. Who's that there? That's your friend?
[00:01:42] That's your friend you got there. Was it going doc? Was it? Is that your friend doc?
[00:01:47] Your son can talk to Adam's penis. What's that mean? Adam's got the smallest dick in
[00:01:54] the world and only children can see his own but only children that he comes alive in their
[00:02:01] hands. Adam's dick. A heart's children's hands. Small dick.
[00:02:09] No one eighth of my nail really hurts. What's with small dick backwards? That's where I
[00:02:14] was trying to figure out. Kid. Kid laughs or kid lambs right? Kid lambs. Small lambs.
[00:02:22] Skid wouldn't dick be or no. Dick would be kid. Yes. Kid lambs. Kid lambs. Kid lambs.
[00:02:31] That kind of works. Yeah. Scary. Adam Kid lambs. Scary. Hopefully this will drive our audience
[00:02:44] towards the cinema of Sam. Now and well you know what back to the movie houses because
[00:02:50] things are open. Let's fill it up there. Thank you very much to everyone who came to see
[00:02:54] him Baltimore. Dr. Strange Dick or How Small My Dick. How I started to stop worrying about
[00:02:58] small my dick is. Yeah. So are my balls. You guys ever see the killing? That's him too.
[00:03:06] That's really good. Yeah. Yeah. That's good. But there's not really like a identifiable
[00:03:10] thing. Adam on stage. Adam on stage. Adam on stage. Adam on stage. Adam on stage. Adam
[00:03:12] on stage. Pulling his pants down clothes. That's true. Just bombing for 30 minutes and
[00:03:18] then check this out folks. And then he. And it's like we're at the Harvey Weinstein trial.
[00:03:27] How's your dick doing for in real life Adam? Because we've pretty good. Pretty good. He
[00:03:31] disparaged it for the last. Pretty good recently. Not bad. I'm learning to love him again. Are
[00:03:36] you getting hard nicely? Getting hard. Yeah. I'm getting hard. Yeah. Free clothes. Yeah.
[00:03:42] Yeah. From here. My dick is getting hard. Getting hard from the dog sitting on my lap
[00:03:46] and getting hard all the time. That's great. Yeah. Light touches brushing against strangers
[00:03:52] on the subway. Masked up. Well, yeah. I'm getting hard. I'm always getting hard as Arnold
[00:03:57] would say in pumping iron. Yeah. I'm always. I'm always coming. That's fucking awesome.
[00:04:05] I'm trying to pump iron. You know what I was watching? I was in Baltimore. You know,
[00:04:08] I was just clumping iron. Gotcha. You got you. I'm not I'm not. I can't be one of the
[00:04:17] clumps. I'm not. I'm so strong. My baby. You got you. I'm not. Although I will say the
[00:04:29] little fat boy too big. They're eating too damn much. I did like the Herculean. Herculean
[00:04:36] is her. Absolutely. That was actually now that I'm thinking about it. That was a big that
[00:04:41] was a big move. The fact it was to do Hercules was also the truffle shuffle of course. I
[00:04:47] know. I kind of want to rewatch Naughty Professor. I bet I bet it's good. I haven't seen it in a while.
[00:04:52] Yeah, baby. Yeah. The classic line from the Naughty Professor. Yeah. Yeah, babe. Mom,
[00:04:59] mom, mom, mom, oh, baby. Janet Jackson was in the first one or the second one. Maybe the
[00:05:08] second one. Who's in the first one? I bet the Naughty Professor, but it's a nerd. It's
[00:05:14] a nerd and he drinks a potion. But it's come and well, no, then he's just like, and you
[00:05:22] just like bust. He's in the middle of just fucking busting. Yeah. And he's walking around.
[00:05:28] He's just like spring come all over the inside of his pants. People are like, look how cool
[00:05:32] that guy. Yeah. Look at that nerd. You know, now that I think about it, I'm actually pissed
[00:05:37] off at the night professor was because the original he goes from what is it? It's Jerry
[00:05:43] Lewis, right? Yeah. He just uncrosses eyes, basically. Yeah. Yeah. But the second one,
[00:05:50] why did they have to take such a fivefold? Well, nobody was fat in the 1950s. But come
[00:05:54] on. He could. He's just Jewish. That's true. Which is a problem, which is an equally bad
[00:05:58] health problem to have. Honestly, I would rather be a fat non-jude than a Jew. You guys
[00:06:05] have everyone. Everyone's intolerant. Everyone's got a deviant. Everyone's always hypochondriac
[00:06:16] or have real health problems. Whereas, you know, as a fact non-Jew, sure I'm not as healthy
[00:06:22] as your average as your average non-Jew. But also there is an element of inbreeding.
[00:06:27] I agree. It's just I'm cold because my BMI is low and I'm constantly having to defend
[00:06:33] Israel. That's right. You're using up so much. Fat community is always inbreding. That's
[00:06:38] right. We're doing their own in-house breading and frying and common foods. I do Chinese
[00:06:46] food and deep frying and refrying it. It wasn't done right the first time. Yeah. We're going
[00:06:51] to heat it back. We're going to take out of them and heat it back up at home. You know
[00:06:54] the way the way people like restore antiques, that's what we do with fast food. Yeah. Like
[00:07:00] this wasn't grilled correctly. Oh, yeah. You're like working on your 57-7. That's right.
[00:07:05] That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right.
[00:07:07] With a wing style. That's right. With a wing style. That's right. By Guy Fieri. Today,
[00:07:11] we're restoring a 17-minute old Domino's. Yeah, dude. You strip the old cheese. You put
[00:07:21] a new layer of cheese over top. Yeah. And we're doing, we're converting this one to pepperoni.
[00:07:28] Oh, yeah. You're doing a pepperoni conversion. Yeah. I have an apple. So goddamn. Yeah. That's
[00:07:36] a little fucked crust pizza. Oh, I would love pizza. We should do it. We should go to a
[00:07:41] we should go to Pizza Hut. Mm-hmm. Drive out the suburbs, go to Pizza Hut, play a little
[00:07:45] Area 51. Yeah, dude. That would be awesome. Yeah. Drink a bunch of orange soda out of the
[00:07:51] soda machine. We need to go and then go bowling. I remember in the movie in a hundred percent.
[00:07:55] In the movie Mars Attacks, the kids got really good at killing aliens because they played
[00:07:59] enough Area 51. Mm-hmm. We showed the three of us go to the bowling alley and they're like,
[00:08:07] okay, two pairs of shoes and I see one of you brought your own bowling ball. No. No.
[00:08:12] I don't look like a bowling ball. Just polishing stuff. I'm just putting a towel. Whatever it
[00:08:21] was. I didn't know what the angle was going to be exactly, but I knew I'd be a real pro.
[00:08:27] You brought your own ball. First of all, I'm a grown man. I'm not the size of a ball.
[00:08:33] Maybe if I was a little a smaller fat guy who's rounder and first of all, maybe back in the day
[00:08:40] when I didn't have any hair, maybe I could see this one. Yeah. But I am not a bowling ball.
[00:08:45] Maybe if you had said something like, I don't know,
[00:08:47] one of those machine, you know, those machines that little kids ride, which was like,
[00:08:53] we put 25 cents in. Yeah. Are you jacking off? I'm scratching my nuts.
[00:08:59] I mean, you just got off the road. You look like you've been masturbating for the last 15 minutes.
[00:09:05] My nuts, what do you want from me? I don't have the kind of soaps I like in Greek town.
[00:09:09] I'm just asking you. There was a stretch on the other side. There was an article that said that
[00:09:14] apparently showering less than quarantine has made people cleaner. Really?
[00:09:19] Once again, I've been thinking, no, this is I got to see your all your science on this man.
[00:09:23] Who came out of that? Yeah. Fucking Harvard or some shit.
[00:09:28] Harvard. You hear that? I don't hear. How about this? I'm going to ask God in the Harvard.
[00:09:33] I probably could have if I tried. Yeah. I just feel like we got honorary degrees.
[00:09:37] I got we bought. We bought. We bought this. One of the things about Epstein was that he was
[00:09:43] like a Harvard guy, but he didn't go to. He didn't go there. He just got the shirt. He was like us.
[00:09:48] He thought it was cool. He was like one of us. Fucking gay. Yeah. By the way, listen,
[00:09:53] watch how you speak for me. I was waitlisted at Johns Hopkins. You're wait.
[00:09:56] Well, it W. No, no. I'm like, I'm like, you get in, but you're too fast.
[00:10:02] They put him on a scale. He's crying. It's a truck scale. This is one of those truck wings.
[00:10:08] Yeah. They're like, what is this? The last part of the interview,
[00:10:13] why are we going all the way out? He's definitely got illegals inside of them.
[00:10:17] Yeah. He's smuggling. He's smuggling two small Peruvians in his ass.
[00:10:23] And I'm like, no, I'm just incredibly fast. He's way as much as three people.
[00:10:32] Yeah. Maybe I should have just fuck it. Sometimes I wonder, what if I just went to Johns Hopkins,
[00:10:37] waited it out, talked to stop. You would have been a real nutty professor. I would have been a
[00:10:42] bust a nutty professor. I'll tell you that much. That's good. Should we make that movie?
[00:10:48] The bust a nutty professor, it kind of goes back to what you were saying earlier.
[00:10:51] You sure you weren't waitlisted to know whatever it is, no.
[00:10:57] And what Tim Hortons? Yeah. Just because it's a name, because a name like John Topkins.
[00:11:02] Yeah, exactly. That's the idea. Long John's long John. Long John. Yep.
[00:11:12] That's good. Big John's big John's boy. No, it's Bob's big boy. Big John's boy.
[00:11:18] It should be another restaurant. Big John's boy? Yeah.
[00:11:23] You got waitlisted at Sloan Kettering, the hospital.
[00:11:27] Hospital. Yeah. They said you're too bad.
[00:11:29] They're too bad to go to the hospital. Yeah. They broke their Hippocratic oath.
[00:11:33] What do I, then who sees me? The guys, there's the elephants at the zoo.
[00:11:37] Yeah. You got to go to a vet. I got to go to a hippo vet.
[00:11:42] Is say, say, say, say, what's how do you pronounce that word? S-A-T-I-E-T-Y.
[00:11:49] S-A-T-I-E-T-Y. I don't know about that word.
[00:11:52] S-A-T-I-E-T school. S-A-T-I-E. Like S-A-T-I-E.
[00:12:00] Is that a S-A-T-I-E school? Yeah, yeah. It's like...
[00:12:06] What does that mean? Is that a fucking word? Like to be S-A-T-I-E.
[00:12:08] Yeah. The feeling or state of being S-A-T-I-E-T.
[00:12:18] I'm going to count that as a good riff.
[00:12:33] Fuck that word. That word songs about how everybody...
[00:12:40] We live in a world with no discrete meals.
[00:12:56] We did some real fat phobic stuff on the...
[00:13:00] The premium episode which is coming out this Sunday.
[00:13:05] When I'm away, you just attack my community.
[00:13:23] This is checking every day having a different cake.
[00:13:26] Stop got mad that you got rejected from an HBCU
[00:13:29] because you thought it meant hamburger bun cheese university.
[00:13:38] They're like, what are all these black people doing at hamburger bun
[00:13:48] And you and BC is the junior restaurant bacon cheese.
[00:13:56] I love that old tenacious D-scat restaurant.
[00:14:02] I didn't understand why that was supposed to be funny.
[00:14:05] Because it's like a guy that wants to be on a diet,
[00:14:08] So he's getting the small versions of everything,
[00:14:12] And the charm of Jack Black, I think we can all agree.
[00:14:17] There's nothing better than a charming fat guy.
[00:14:23] You know, I think that we can all agree.
[00:14:30] which reminds you of how cool black people are.
[00:14:37] The guy's got everything going for him.
[00:14:38] That is another element to his personality.
[00:14:52] No, there is parties on the Eastern shore.
[00:14:57] Yeah, you have to go to the Eastern shore.
[00:15:24] No, you're going to want to say keep that sandwich at $4.
[00:15:30] And some of the names like a ramen place.
[00:15:43] They had like an old man that sends them out with candies.
[00:15:50] so we're trying to give the kid a dollar.
[00:15:55] And I was like, that's a terrible deal for six Oreos.
[00:16:03] She was cutting us a deal on the Oreos.
[00:16:07] You know, like they send a bunch of kids out with candy
[00:16:11] And then they return to their, you know,
[00:16:18] He's the man, the old Jewish man from all of our twists
[00:16:21] who makes all the orphan boys go out and make money.
[00:16:24] I'm not reading all of her twists, bro.
[00:16:34] Because he doesn't seem like an essential part of the story.
[00:16:38] And he joins a band of the orphaned boys.
[00:16:41] It's being run by an old Jewish man who's sending them out to make money for him.
[00:16:48] we're raising money for our basketball team.
[00:16:50] Yeah, they're part of one of those faggen style schemes.
[00:16:55] Faggen is one of the, he's like one of the old anti-Semitic characters.
[00:17:07] So good that they kept the name around.
[00:17:11] You don't hear a faggen, but you hear a Shylock.
[00:17:20] Anyway, dude, I don't know who Faggen is.
[00:17:25] I didn't know a lot of people don't know who.
[00:17:26] I guarantee a lot of people listening right now
[00:17:28] are like, what the fuck is Adam talking about?
[00:17:30] A lot of people listening there and I don't know much.
[00:17:35] So you were haggling with a little girl for.
[00:17:37] I didn't get haggled, but it did bother me
[00:17:39] that she was charging $3 for six Oreos.
[00:17:43] And then one of the other kids came back and she's.
[00:17:57] I'm not going to give them $3 for six Oreos.
[00:18:11] You think they make money on that $3 Oreo?
[00:18:14] I'm still thinking about schools and candy.
[00:18:35] Because it's like we could just pick like,
[00:19:47] Now I'm going to just a fat lady store.
[00:19:52] It is good, but it's pretty off because it's good.
[00:20:12] Because I just want a major in wearing fat lady pants.
[00:20:17] That's a such a funny concept for a store.
[00:20:22] It's like big, big bitches that try to look professional.
[00:20:25] Nothing wrong with that as far as I'm concerned.
[00:20:28] I'd like to, yeah, I'd like to get sucked off by a BBW and a pencil skirt.
[00:20:35] It'd be one of those jumbo novelty sized pencils.
[00:20:41] I was going to say like marker, but jumbo novelty sized.
[00:20:52] What is it like a big novelty sized pencil?
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[00:24:16] I think maybe they're testing all the sessions.
[00:24:25] See Kyle, I love saluting Hitler while I'm dick deep in a baby.
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[00:26:19] Because you know, when you get fucking high,
[00:26:21] shit off Mary Jane, you're not deep in a fucking bag of Pringers.
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[00:26:35] I've never scrolled down this far on the page.
[00:26:59] because you just think it comes in in a pre-rolls.
[00:27:02] You got the little half grams, they got the whole gram.
[00:27:06] So why don't you sprinkle some of that onto my nuts and smoke that?
[00:27:11] I have some, but it fell under the couch.
[00:27:18] I'll find a stick or something to get under there with you.
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[00:28:42] I feel like the Walter White of this kind of shit.
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[00:29:14] I've been taking my no say ends at all.
[00:29:19] Yeah, and look, does he have as much energy as he is happy?
[00:29:25] But he's not saying it anymore, you know.
[00:29:27] So sometimes you have to fucking do trade off.
[00:29:30] Oh no, I accidentally took say ends all.
[00:29:36] I've been taking my say ends every day.
[00:29:42] Yeah, I gotta, I gotta, the doctor says I gotta say ends.
[00:30:02] I know I shouldn't, I know I should only do one a day,
[00:30:10] Fifth chance financing, so sweet a deal.
[00:30:23] Damn, imagine what a 97 Hyundai is looking like right now?
[00:30:27] I think anybody's patrolling one right now,
[00:30:31] I saw a Saturn the other day on my neighborhood.
[00:30:43] Like GM just like canceled half their brands,
[00:30:56] You're also thinking of the burrito in this show.
[00:30:58] I didn't even know that wasn't burrito restaurant.
[00:31:05] So you think the reason I wanted a fire bird-
[00:31:09] that attacks me when something is named after a restaurant-
[00:31:21] I have wanted, I have wanted a fucking fire bird,
[00:31:27] There was a lime green firebird on a Dundalk lot for a year
[00:31:33] Some for some reason it didn't sell. Yeah, you told you told this story. I know that's what I'm saying
[00:31:37] So that's so maybe maybe from the time it was a little boy. I knew
[00:31:43] Firebird was the type of burrito. Yeah, what are now just since we since we did broach the subject
[00:31:48] What kind of burritos do they have over there?
[00:31:52] The same kind of burritos they have literally anywhere you go. That's not true. Anyways, because she dreams calm Pungo could come down
[00:31:59] Dude, that is not true burritos are fucking vastly different places you go
[00:32:04] Kedoba versus Chipotle versus what's the case?
[00:32:08] So it's the place the place with no there's a qualitative difference versus the place that used to be open that was awesome
[00:32:13] That's dead now you say in all this and all I'm here and all I'm hearing is ching chong
[00:32:18] I'm Miss Lucio Lucio once the illusion was incredible. Yeah, Lucio Lucio was high
[00:32:23] He's had these fries and burritos good. So that place was so good that I got food poisoning from there twice
[00:32:30] I would still come crawling back. I remember when Chipotle got case of and stop and I went to Chipotle
[00:32:36] Yep, we're like, oh god. We gotta see what this is all about. I haven't had a good burrito in a while, dude
[00:32:42] There isn't the Mexican food in the Mexican food here's fucking gay. No, there's one really good place
[00:32:57] It's really bad and then Nick says it's bad and then you're like
[00:33:00] You should see when you guys aren't even here. What is it? It's like what's it called? I'm furious at myself. Uh, you are you
[00:33:13] Went there. There's the place in Jackson Heights, and then they just added a second place
[00:33:16] So I'm sure I went to dinner with Woody Allen. No, I didn't he saw Woody Allen
[00:33:21] Really? Yeah, that's awesome. There's like talking and soon you have been soon you were just like get the fuck out of here
[00:33:27] Tables away from us. Are you joking? I'm dead serious. Whoa that rocks. He came out of this cave
[00:33:32] Yeah, did you say you say I'm a big fan of yours?
[00:33:38] I know that like he does this whole thing where he goes he didn't say this he got Corley does this like Woody
[00:33:43] And it's a thing he does with Michael Jackson, too
[00:33:45] It's really no Michael Jackson actually is this shot up Adam
[00:33:49] And Woody Allen was like do you have any quarters?
[00:33:52] I was like wow aren't you like a billionaire? Do you feel like I can't stop? I can't help myself
[00:34:03] My rapist yeah, I'm sorry. I was trying to save money. I'm saying I'm kind is I'm saying that because he's a rapist by the way
[00:34:11] Yeah, yeah, not for any other. Yeah, there's no other reason we're disparaging Woody Allen or talking like that
[00:34:17] We were doing a rapist voice. Yeah, it is so
[00:34:28] Little kids Joe Jackson chemically castrated when he's a child in that sexual function
[00:34:34] He was like he was like an angel sent from God did angels have genitalia. I don't think strata the ones that know it did
[00:34:40] Big old dick. Yeah, really? Yeah, either an angel should have a smooth or should have a giant huge car
[00:34:47] I think awesome. Yeah massive, but doesn't get hard. It's too. It's like an engineering mistake. I would God make like doctor Manhattan
[00:34:54] Yeah, yes exactly that big floppy blue thing
[00:34:57] You just want to how about nurse Manhattan and then doctor Manhattan. He's got the blue dick, but then also a big pair of tits
[00:35:04] Oh, yeah, mm-hmm sign me up. That'd be cool. What it what is like I have to live on the moon cuz everyone's trying to fuck me
[00:35:09] Yeah, it's not very good people just keep trying to fuck with this nurse Manhattan look the same way in the face
[00:35:15] Or does she have you she's same way in the face, but she's got the nurse hat on. Yeah nurse hat jacked big tits
[00:35:21] No, I don't want to jacked big don't I'd like big tits cute big dick. You're gonna be man-handled by a nurse
[00:35:27] That's what your dream is not really to be spongebait and man-handled by spongebait and sucked off now
[00:35:36] From a super jail. That's your dream woman
[00:35:41] Your mind is suppressing your memory of it because you know, that's true. I would like I just said I'll get spongebait
[00:35:49] And sucked off. I have no problem with that. Uh-huh. I don't know about getting man-handled spongebait squarepants
[00:35:55] I would prefer to do that if someone's got to get man-handling. I would prefer to do the man-handling
[00:36:01] Yeah, I don't particularly want to be but sometimes the lady does the man-handling
[00:36:07] Fucked anybody strong enough to man-handle me actually, that's not true
[00:36:12] I've got my my head my head squeezed pretty vociferously while eating pussy with some very strong thighs
[00:36:18] It was pretty tight actually like a zine on style. Honestly. Yeah, and that was awesome. Yeah
[00:36:23] But for the most part no the women that I have sex with are not capable of man-handling me
[00:36:28] I'm sure you have definitely a stop stream. Wow. That's not good. No, I don't think so. Yes
[00:36:39] That would be a good look for you stop dating a fitness lady, dude
[00:36:43] I'm so in but she's got to be strong. Of course. I don't have a problem with that
[00:36:48] But that's the thing psychologically I would have to be
[00:36:52] Powerful to not get man-handling have to be my cunning
[00:36:55] I have my charisma all the late all the ladies I've had sex with are incredibly strong
[00:37:01] But on the inside you literally strong people tell me you you definitely fucked at least a couple women that could beat you up
[00:37:07] Hmm. Oh just mostly because of how frail you are. I fucked a lot of women that have beat me
[00:37:13] You're just getting backhanded by fucking little ass girls what's the largest woman you fucked like they could the biggest
[00:37:29] Just in general general just powerful. How about that most physically powerful?
[00:37:38] Think in college in the laundry room. Yeah, there's a big girl. She pinned you down your ass
[00:37:48] So in a wrestling match she would have beaten you at the time we would say
[00:37:56] Possibly yes, I didn't start weight training at that point. I was still on the tail end of puberty at that point freshman
[00:38:04] We didn't really even say any words to each other just kind of happen. No shut up
[00:38:09] Are you serious very erotic? I I'm masturbate to the thought of it. Are you fucking serious?
[00:38:13] You were in a you were in a laundry room, and you just fucked a stranger. It wasn't fuck. Oh, okay
[00:38:18] It was a third base or oral pleasure you were okay. Yeah, did you you only better than sex
[00:38:25] You only got your dick's after you eat pussy, too
[00:38:30] This is awesome Adam. I'm pretty cool. Yeah, so what oh that's the around kind of and you
[00:38:38] No never hooked up again. Wow. That's nice. That's magic. It was very nice
[00:38:44] That would make me believe in God that kept me going for a while. Absolutely. That's huge. I'm so happy
[00:38:51] Right now. Shout out to her. She was very nice. That's so cool. And what happens you guys know college nice college, but it's like hey
[00:38:58] What's up, but it wasn't regular college like you know toga party everyone getting ladle or me getting ladle
[00:39:04] I wasn't getting ladle all the time. So I'm just here is one of my few sexual experiences there
[00:39:08] That's huge, and that's so she was she was like stout
[00:39:18] She was solid you would say she was driving the encounter you got your dick sucked you were chosen
[00:39:23] It was a vibe thing it was hot a vibe. It was a vibe her in the in the fucking thing late at night doing laundry
[00:39:28] How will time we talking 1 a.m. Yeah like to oh my god is how you just start talking? I
[00:39:35] Think we turned a light the light off who turns the light off
[00:39:40] Maybe me maybe her I don't remember light goes off light goes off and then you start kissing a little bit of
[00:39:46] Kissing a little bit of kissing there's no talking
[00:39:49] I don't I don't remember clearly, but no I don't think that there was a lot of huge the whole thing last
[00:39:57] Seven I think I came immediately. Oh I think I came so fast. I think I came very fast
[00:40:02] I still come very fast. So that's huge. Yeah, I know how about this you still beat off to honestly that might be my peak
[00:40:11] I think I think it is yeah, she's it the vibe
[00:40:14] That might be my go vibe and she's sucking you all I don't know if it's her vibe my vibe
[00:40:20] It's very very hot. I think I'm gonna not to disrespect you
[00:40:25] Anymore than usually do here, but I'm gonna say I appreciate the compliment you're making me feel really not
[00:40:30] I'm going to say that you did you were it's a little bit of right place right time. Oh, yeah
[00:40:37] I think you caught her in a real dick sucking food and the guy and God said Adam could use a W right now
[00:40:43] It was next let's get this fucking rugby player to suck is let's get him. Let's get him to grip on us
[00:40:55] It wasn't an accident figure out there I think about you it was beautiful. Yeah, holy fuck no it felt felt nice
[00:41:02] Anything came back to my dorm didn't really say anything to anyone. I'm so you just sleep. That's incredible put on
[00:41:17] Forest or Grandma's boy. I was during that
[00:41:21] Those and you know my Dell on my Dell laptop a kid that was watching those movies
[00:41:27] Mm-hmm nothing could possibly better than randomly getting your dick sucked to the laundry best seven minutes my life
[00:41:32] Oh, I'm so jealous dude pretty cool fuck pretty cool. I think if any spontaneous. No that stuff happens anymore
[00:41:40] We're adults. I mean you're not where you gonna you know also. We're so we're so you get your dick
[00:41:45] So famous now in a bathroom bar. We're such celebs now
[00:42:12] And that gets their pussies going they're like what is that a solid gold wallet
[00:42:16] Yeah, and you're like zip. I say that's exactly right and I got a ridge wallet calm
[00:42:23] Which this just sent us a whole bunch of shit. Yes, they did we got the duffel and maybe you guys can talk about how nice the
[00:42:29] Large backpack song I can't really see us
[00:42:32] Remember there was battle of wits last week and solve loss. I can't really speak to this one
[00:42:39] I have used it and I put my power bank in it and a cord and I was on the go the other day
[00:42:45] And I was able to charge my that's great
[00:42:47] My phone and use it that's great and I'm happy for you
[00:42:49] And it's kind of nice too because you have the cord coming out of the backpack
[00:42:52] So you feel like one of those guys in like in a like World War two like calling in like that
[00:42:57] They need air support or something. You're the communications guy with the backpack. It's pretty cool
[00:43:03] That is cool. Now this is definitely Adam with that. I think well there goes a mentally retarded
[00:43:09] That's that's pretty much what you look like I say there goes one of the gayest guys have ever seen cool back cool backpack
[00:43:18] Yeah, the backpack rules the guy is gay
[00:43:24] Yeah, and you can decorate it with different pins and stuff
[00:43:27] Yeah, I should see the kind of I've one with swag I one with the American flag in the Israeli flag crossing
[00:43:33] I thought yeah, there's only weird on the lapel of my sister 18 karat gold one which I took for myself
[00:43:39] Yeah, by the way, I'm I got to get the duffel. You don't need the duff. You got the you got the
[00:43:43] Next yeah, but the duffel now has other stuff in it. No, you said it came to go
[00:43:48] Why are you getting a backpack and the duff? Why do you get 18 karat gold?
[00:43:52] You can have one there's in there in the bag if you want a wallet you can take a wallet
[00:43:55] How about I thought listen? I'll take the bag home to check the wallets. I want the bag contains other items
[00:44:03] That's that argument is such a Jedi mind trick attempt on your part
[00:44:09] Just because there's other things in the bag you could put the thing somewhere else
[00:44:13] I could and empty the bag perfectly in the bag. You have a lot of bad. What about your old backpack?
[00:44:18] You don't use I'm using them to cat sleeps on
[00:44:21] I'm using the bag. I got the little backpack to do brand work
[00:44:27] What guys your company I'm going around handing out the products to Ridge wallet. Yes, so you got a side deal with Ridge
[00:44:38] Wallet now. I have a side deal where I do additional marketing for them by handing out the products to homeless people
[00:44:43] Okay, well listen when it's empty since that's what you're doing well
[00:44:47] You can argue with the homeless man that ends up with it
[00:44:49] You're stealing from the homeless again what we're gonna put in there candy that you're gonna eat in one day anyway
[00:44:59] You're gonna check the donation bin go back to the I'm not I don't put candy in duffle bags
[00:45:04] Anyways, this this gold wallet is very nice. It is nice. I have to say
[00:45:12] They all got the money clip in the cash and it's made out of money, but I really like this thing. I've been using it for
[00:45:21] We just take a look here. What are you going through the bag? He told me you just told me I could go through the bag
[00:45:27] I know I know oh yeah, you can do that, but don't look at my medicine. You don't have any medicine. I do have medicine in there a
[00:45:34] Lot of people don't know there's little dick pills now. They don't know that I'm dying
[00:45:38] Yeah, and now I'm actually a hero for continuing to do the show despite the fact. Yeah, he's like the guy black panther guy
[00:45:51] I was gonna buy you guys knives. I know you were and then I couldn't grave. I couldn't find the Jewish knife
[00:46:01] I was trying to find the kind they used to do the
[00:46:05] Circumscisions. Oh, yeah, it's more of like a ridge Damascus. What's this? I have no idea
[00:46:11] So let's see it up and find out. Yeah, take the knife and open that up anyways ridge wall
[00:46:17] It promo code come town or come town 20
[00:46:20] Do you remember what it is? I think it's 20, but I know yeah, it's come down 20 free shipping and returns on all orders
[00:46:26] Wow a black blade. Yeah, yeah, you fucking take the operator. Be careful with your fingers
[00:46:31] You're cutting in a very unsafe way now that's cut away from yourself. You're about to stab yourself
[00:46:41] Stop flying around the room. You go on the room
[00:46:56] Let me fucking crack open the Damascus yeah the mask but that's just like it's just wood wood grain, right?
[00:47:01] It's pretty cute. It's a metal wood grain or it's an actual wood. No, it's metal. Yeah metal with a wood grain
[00:47:07] Hmm interesting. Yeah, look. I think I'm gonna go full ridge full-time ridge water. You know, yeah, they're nice. What is that?
[00:47:15] Well, I see that little microfiber cloth
[00:47:18] No, I just want to clean my glasses. No. Yeah, they're not for cleaning glasses. What they're microfiber cloth
[00:47:24] You can use it for your glass. It's not there. We're not maybe you're a large back
[00:47:27] That came with a microfiber to wipe off the residuals burned in image of a man's penis
[00:47:32] That's not even staring at glasses burn
[00:47:41] You can't wipe it off it's like the way like a what is it like an LED TV if you leave it's long?
[00:47:45] Oh, yeah, oh, that's what happens to Adam's eyes
[00:47:52] No, you you are I want to you're buying it. I haven't yet a CX that you got a deal on because you know a guy I
[00:48:03] See one how much is that cost? I might I might have a deal. So what's the cost?
[00:48:10] So I'm gonna call him and I'm gonna Ridge wallet calm
[00:48:13] They bitch it's your if your birthday you get an 80 million dollar gift card and something
[00:48:20] You buy the wallet it's guaranteed shipping they guarantee they absolutely absolutely will
[00:48:27] Ship it to you they guarantee that it will they come in the mail this thing where it says get 15 to 19 dollars
[00:48:36] Share this offer with friends they get 10% of their first purchase and you can earn increasing rewards Wow
[00:48:41] So go to Ridge wallet calm use promo code come down or come down 20. I can't remember which one it is and I never will
[00:48:49] That's our promise and it's a great product. Yeah, and it's I'm really the rest of the price
[00:48:54] I'm actually really enjoying my new duffel bag as well, which I will be taking this is what you did you fucking idiot
[00:48:58] I'm taking the knife the wallet and the duffel bag
[00:49:01] You could have taken the knife yourself. It's been in your house. It would have been unfair
[00:49:06] Everything I've been trying to be every day that's not one of the back now. You're an idiot
[00:49:11] Everything stayed fair. Sorry that I simply leaving it all in there
[00:49:15] No, it wouldn't have been a fair do you want Adam? I just want to see what's in there here
[00:49:19] I'll hand you this stuff. I love I'll hand you everything in the duffel bag Adam
[00:49:28] Like this one, but I don't know I'm a wallet guy
[00:49:32] Yeah, maybe try this guy. I mean Ridge wallet guy. Yeah, I'm a little bit more. What are you doing?
[00:49:37] Sorry, that's that's the story of the show and I was in between wallets and they sent me one and now
[00:49:45] I've never looked back. That's true. You know me. I do plenty of looking back. We should sell your old Ridge wallet
[00:49:50] I do nothing but repress. I don't want all of it. No, you can have them just put it in the know
[00:49:58] Now next to be mad. There's gonna be garbage. There's gonna be shit all over the place put it all back in the duffel bag
[00:50:06] That's fine. I'm coming with a shitty bag
[00:50:09] Just just just ask them just email them and ask them to send you a duffel bag
[00:50:14] You using the duffel bag the duffel bag is filled with the Ridge wallet shit, which is being distributed to
[00:50:19] There's only like three to the socially and feebled people. There's only three wallets in here that I do work with
[00:50:27] What about the big does a lot of charity the penis fully and feebled? Yeah, they're also getting stuff. You're also getting condoms
[00:50:35] Ridge rate condoms. Yeah, I'm bringing condoms hundred percent
[00:50:39] I get this one or the other one or the Damascus. What do you guys think? I like the gradient? I like the metal gradient
[00:50:46] I'm gonna get this one. Yeah, do that one. Go to Ridge wallet calm the products are beautiful folks
[00:50:52] They have a great line of products. It's not just wallets
[00:50:55] Mm-hmm and the backpack I got the little backpack and I have to say it's pretty good to as well
[00:51:01] It's nice and because it's little it's like you're like a slut girl
[00:51:06] What also helps stop with dieting because if he had the full size he's gonna get I wouldn't feel it with candy
[00:51:11] There's gonna be I wouldn't feel whatever bag I have with higher roasted pig
[00:51:19] Liquid you put some apartment puts the bag down. There's an apple rolling across the floor
[00:51:29] Now you can just fit two hands and so the entire pig. No, I'm off the fucking pork. I'm on that shit. I'm off that shit
[00:51:37] That's good. I'm on that ocelama like I'm type shit right now. Do you yeah? No pork actually? That's a lie
[00:51:43] I guess I actually haven't eaten pork in quite some time because I mean a lot of seafood when I want to treat myself
[00:51:49] I get a little fucking beef. I went to the the handrail place in decal mark. So good. It's bigger now, too
[00:51:56] They got a larger menu. They got more now. You want to go after this? I have to go home and
[00:52:00] FaceTime my friend. We're working on something
[00:52:06] Gay porno. It's a gay porno. It's a gay porno over FaceTime. Yeah
[00:52:13] We working on do nothing. I don't talk about it. Well, if you want to hear what Adam's working on check out
[00:52:18] You could have just found premium. Yeah, I did mention on the premium this week
[00:52:22] Stav was on the road for it. So we say I can't wait to say a lot of anti Greek patreon pro Albanian what pro
[00:52:32] Albanian slash comtown. Yeah, there's an extra episode. There's an extra episode every there are about
[00:52:38] 300 episodes on the patreon feed. I checked this week and as you know, I am dying and next time
[00:52:44] Get back to all this while you can like Chadwick Boseman. Yeah
[00:52:48] It would be funny if you guys continue doing the show, but you probably would that's kind of how everybody works
[00:52:53] No, I think I would feel kind of weird Adam would keep doing it. Yeah, I'd be keep doing it alone
[00:52:59] I'd act like you guys had him would do some kind of hostile takeover or just bleed the patreon dry. Yeah. Yeah, like I
[00:53:07] Insist on being entombed with both the Ridge wall with duffel bag and
[00:53:14] Somewhere just people they're laying the bricks on the screen. Yeah, like smithers. Yeah
[00:53:25] Baby, I want to fuck yeah, not one one of those hand rolls are burrito or something
[00:53:30] Those hand rolls are very good. I'm down to go. What's a hand roll? It's like a sushi that they don't cut. Oh, yeah
[00:53:39] It's like you eat it immediately and the nori is extra crispy and you tip it's it's so good
[00:53:45] It's a fucking fucking eel in the salmon belly there fucking a man Sam and the Toro. Yeah, fatty fatty Sam
[00:53:53] Awesome. Oh, no, that's Toro's tuna Adam's Adam had to say he knows the word. Yep
[00:54:00] But my PD bomb squad is called into examine a package where all traffic around the museum is being which museum?
[00:54:10] Hopefully that the museum of get wait. Why why that one? It's not in
[00:54:18] Let's talk about the African American Museum just being like a regular museum but with like a sort of like an African American theme
[00:54:27] So it's still like y'all have to see electricity. Yeah, yeah
[00:54:32] Y'all want to see some old paintings. Yeah some Dutch shit. Mm-hmm
[00:54:37] The Ben Frank the Dutch masters the guys from Dutch masters. They call this shit Trump layo lay
[00:54:44] What's chopped layo a I don't know it's the only thing I learned in art history class
[00:54:47] I think it's something that looks like it it like it is in real life
[00:54:52] About our words to reclass our words. Yeah. Yeah, you know how you can do like women's studies in college
[00:55:00] You should be able to do retard studies. Yeah, why can't this do it?
[00:55:03] We're studying the history of retards. That's why I don't know why you can't like if you can't stay
[00:55:09] Yeah, if they're like, yeah, this is what it's been like to be a bitch throughout history, right?
[00:55:14] Right. Well, how about being like a retard or
[00:55:19] If I get major why they do that, let's see famous retarded people
[00:55:24] Champagne and I am Sam. Yeah, that wasn't even real. Just writing your thesis on I am Sam
[00:55:34] Yeah, I guess they're who are the I mean I guess they were like monarchs and stuff who were probably mentally and feeble. Yeah, yeah
[00:55:42] I guess yeah, if you look this up, it just seems like guys. They used to put it in the circus. Unfortunately
[00:55:51] It's not really going for what you can write a thing about the circus
[00:55:54] You can write a paper about the circuit was funny back in the day when like PT Barnum at his like museum of bullshit in New York
[00:56:01] And the exhibit called the what is it and it was just a retarded black guy
[00:56:16] Contemporaneous accounts of people being like, you know, they have this exhibit called of what is it?
[00:56:20] And it's clearly just a mentally disabled guy from Virginia
[00:56:24] It's like even then they weren't like wow, what is it? They're like, oh, this is a retarded person
[00:56:34] What about Asperger's that's probably people are saying Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart was an Asperger's guy
[00:56:41] That's true Isaac Newton Jerry Seinfeld. Well, I think Seinfeld admitted about himself
[00:56:48] History's 30 most inspiring people on the autism spectrum. Here we go
[00:56:55] Megan Fox hands Christian Anderson Benjamin Banneker. Oh the clock guy, of course
[00:57:05] Henry Cavendish Charles Darwin Emily Dickensuck Paul D. Roch the rock
[00:57:17] Michael Angelo the New York Herald ad tells the reputed story the creator of Nintendo's Pokemon
[00:57:23] So they capture and process of civilizing what Barnum called the nondescript
[00:57:28] The what is it exhibited presented in an African American man is the link between man and monkey Jesus Christ
[00:57:34] What is it open at the American Museum shortly after the publication of Charles Darwin's origin of species?
[00:57:39] At the height of political tensions over slavery in the US
[00:57:42] The exhibit claimed to prove that Africans descended from monkeys and thus merged supposedly objective scientific findings about evolution with ongoing
[00:57:51] Antebellum debates over racial definition
[00:57:59] Yeah pretty fucked up you ask me Daryl Hannah apparently she's autistic
[00:58:05] That was cool Barnes promotional material for the what is it claim that it is the opinion of most scientific man that he is the connecting link
[00:58:12] Between the wild native African and the orangutan. Oh Kinsey
[00:58:17] The sex guy the way because you have to have a scale
[00:58:23] Back call back to the beginning of the show. Yeah
[00:58:40] Oh, congrats to Elon friend of the show for finally long overdue
[00:58:45] We've been we've been a lobbying for that for a while. It's it's nice that a me a certified meme Lord
[00:58:51] Could be that's the best thing about his fans is that they think he's really
[00:58:57] This picture of Adam I found that's not me
[00:58:59] That guy that guy's got a button knows exactly
[00:59:06] My if I looked like that my mother would be my parents would think I was such a good boy
[00:59:10] Yeah, if I was just a you do look like a bow tie sweet young thing is you do look like this guy Sam Humphrey
[00:59:22] From Frankston Victoria Australia's best not yeah, I guess he's 27 and he's four foot two nice
[00:59:32] The greatest show me the greatest showman
[00:59:38] It is you yeah Adam. Are you hearing that's not me it's you
[00:59:45] It's you there's no you can't dispute it
[00:59:50] He looks exactly like him he looks just like him
[00:59:52] We looked at the pictures and it's some really amazing stuff. It looks exactly like him. It's him apparently he started the
[01:00:01] TV film Jeremy the dud. Yeah, so check that out check out Sam Humphrey
[01:00:08] Which in what I'm guessing is Australian or New Zealand television
[01:00:16] Adam's been watching Barney and friends lately. Yeah
[01:00:19] Do you want to you want to tell us about that Adam? What's this it's?
[01:00:31] There's a lot of everybody do you do your share yeah everyone do your share this this shooting in in North Carolina has to be horrific
[01:00:44] Well, they're they already declared the state of emergency, but you never you can ever really trust the cops
[01:00:51] They might be it might be like one thing where it's not as bad
[01:00:54] But they're doing all this to get people to riot beforehand. They're like
[01:01:08] It's sort of the Joker what was the situation? It's like a middle-aged guy got shot in the back
[01:01:23] We're declaring a state of emergency so we can have gay
[01:01:34] Damn what was the situation he is just some guy got shot in the back randomly by cop
[01:01:39] Yeah, looks like they get a traffic stop or I have no idea
[01:01:51] Trending I think your pussy fell out. Oh, yeah, let me look at let me go to CNN calm. Oh no something else. Oh really
[01:01:59] Yeah any day now proud rodeo mom soccer mom baseball mom hockey mom dog fucker and constitutional
[01:02:09] That's her Twitter bio. Yeah, we're honored to serve the people of Wyoming and Congress and also have sex
[01:02:20] You know if you were to pick a dog to fuck there are some like like a marma a marma Duke type dog a big ass dog
[01:02:33] Yeah, you're a powerful strong people's no
[01:02:36] I don't know if she retweeted this woman is like posted some woman that the Iranian woman the guy that fucked up by an acid attack
[01:02:42] But look how hot this woman is that even with the acid still
[01:02:47] Still yeah, she's pretty hot. She's too hot even with her half her face
[01:02:52] Kind of got a Harvey Dent situation American woman could never yeah, she is sort of like a two-face kind of a two-face a two-face
[01:03:05] In fact, it's like it might she probably you probably overlooked this woman if she wasn't like that because you'd be like
[01:03:11] Ah, she's that's just a pretty lady right but now a little bit of acid a little bit of Monica in my life. Yep
[01:03:31] Mambo number I gotta get my dick sucked by a guy if you don't fuck me. I'll kill you
[01:03:42] What was that guy's name fucking Lou Baker
[01:03:54] That's correct that is correct. Yeah, I
[01:04:06] Yeah, he was German David German he was a black miss his name was David Lou Bega
[01:04:11] Yeah, and he changed his name to Lou Bega Wow
[01:04:17] They got a lot of black German guys over there. Yeah
[01:04:24] No, well did aren't there like a bunch of American German black guys because of like war yes
[01:04:30] I thought this guy was American service. I thought this guy was fucking Cuban or something
[01:04:34] That's what I thought too his mom's Italian is dad's black
[01:04:36] Are you see that does kind of sis Sicilian and Ugandan that's basically Cuban. No, that's just extra Italian
[01:04:45] That's just doubling down. That's just making a sure silly and even more
[01:04:49] Sicilian it's true a half Sicilian half black is 100% Sicilian. That's true
[01:04:54] It's a hundred and ten percent Sicilian I to have seen a romance. I don't want to I had those opinions before that
[01:05:05] You know a little bit of you know this in my ass you're actually a Lou Bega
[01:05:13] You ever hear that song mambo number five
[01:05:25] How about this guy's good. Thanks, man. Oh no those trace a little bit of Monica suck my dick a
[01:05:37] Little bit of penis in my little bit of penis in my mouth a
[01:05:42] Little bit of balls on a lady named Monica
[01:05:46] Just a just a pinch of having balls. So it's still a girl. Oh
[01:05:58] Just a little bit of just maybe she's got maybe one ball
[01:06:04] I'm a big old pair of tits. Where's the ball come out of this?
[01:06:10] When I say a little bit of Monica, that's what I mean a little bit
[01:06:15] It's one of her is one for lips droop all the way down mombo one ball mombo is a dance. Will you suck a guy's cock?
[01:06:31] Dude, I don't about to chop your cock off. I'm gonna cut my car about to double circumcise you with this ridge knife, dude
[01:06:38] Dude, I told you my my neighbor converted to Judaism three times
[01:06:43] Like reform conservative Orthodox you have three
[01:06:46] Circumcision, I don't know what the fuck is this doesn't make any sense
[01:06:49] He got his foreskin cut off. He was a Mexican American man his foreskin cut off and then the
[01:06:54] Next time they have to just draw blood to have account is this a circumcision?
[01:06:58] So he had it three times get the fuck a little slit on his on his cock. That's not true. It's true, dude
[01:07:09] Don't know if it was a prick or a slit. I didn't ask to watch this adult male circumcision. No, I didn't
[01:07:14] But I she did I understand that he had three
[01:07:17] Ceremonies I heard it was the rabbi drew blood with his teeth. Mm-hmm. He broke the skin
[01:07:27] What would they do is they put a they put a dime on
[01:07:31] The tip of the penis and then they pulled a foreskin around the dime and then the rabbi bit bites around the ridge of the dime
[01:07:40] That's how they that's how they sever it. No, and then the rabbi's eats the foreskin and the dime
[01:07:45] That's what I heard, dude. Yeah, is that true Adam? Would you say no you put a dime on top of the forest?
[01:07:51] Can you try to flick it over your head expression drop a dime on them comes from
[01:07:58] Baby's penis part of a baby's penis and also money. Yeah
[01:08:08] The model doesn't want to keep the baby's penis. Yes God is telling him to do it. He's not enjoying
[01:08:14] Yeah, baby. I'm doing every second of it
[01:08:16] It's what God needs that man and why because Jewish God is a fucking
[01:08:38] So are you gonna start playing harmonica anytime soon no sunglasses harmonica? Yeah, no, yeah
[01:08:45] That's not happening. That's the next move. No the next well actually I don't know there's got to be something between here and full bald pony
[01:08:51] Or you're doing every say like John Popper kind of I'm sure yeah
[01:08:57] I'm not into that scene. That's your scene. That's not my scene at all. Yeah, you said I'm done with hip hop and all that crap
[01:09:05] I'm getting back in a blues traveler. I've never I can't get back into I've never been in it
[01:09:09] He said when you were a child, I never was I was into Elvis. I told you that guys then
[01:09:14] But I'm not I was never in a blues or any like some like it fat
[01:09:18] He wasn't even in that movie. Yeah, it was just an old movie. Yeah, those merlin men sound like being fat
[01:09:45] Extra cheese a little bit of bacon baby. That's what I like