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Ep. 281 - wonduh bred

Cum Town | Regular | 10/14/2021

[00:00:00] We good we going
[00:00:06] Record
[00:00:09] Go ahead and pound to reap welcome the corn this fucking dick we're here with Bowen yan learned to suck again
[00:00:17] Bowen yan the
[00:00:19] Who just recently left SNL I didn't know that last night. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I did
[00:00:26] I laughed to open I'm
[00:00:30] Opening a KB toys. That'd be fucking that's a bad. That's a bad career move
[00:00:36] But that would be sick cuz I miss KB
[00:00:38] I spent all my I spent all my business. I spent all my did my corporate arbitrage
[00:00:42] Yeah, fucking what do you work for brain capital Adam? What the word arbitrage? He has said it a bunch of my new word
[00:00:49] Did you say you said it four times? We're having lunch and he was like do you did you hear about this kid who went
[00:00:55] YOLO with crypto arbitrage? Oh, yeah, the u billionaire
[00:01:00] Yeah, I what was the point of you telling us that story? We're supposed to think well. That's what we're supposed to be doing
[00:01:06] No, I'm supposed to quit the show go full crypto. Mm-hmm. I'm trying to recruit
[00:01:12] That's not me dude. I'm I've studied a hundred percent times. I I'm greek. I'm gonna buy house
[00:01:18] I'm gonna be a landlord and I'm gonna run a restaurant
[00:01:20] You are the financial guy although Nick is the online guy the financial look I
[00:01:26] Tired from online, but you that's I'm just talking about the ways we're gonna we're gonna use our money after the show
[00:01:32] traditional, you know banking and you internet stuff and me
[00:01:37] I won't be doing landlord restaurant. Wait. Can I can I share a share a little tidbit to can it?
[00:01:43] Can by the way greek people are allowed to be land. Can I share a little fact that I learned the other thing?
[00:01:47] We do have bone yang here, okay, this is as okay
[00:01:51] Go ahead
[00:01:53] Thanks for opening a KB toys, okay. Thanks for having me. I found your bone yang
[00:01:58] I'm bone yank. Thanks for having me and I found out recently that there's a correlation
[00:02:03] Correlation between I forget the actual technical term my friend was telling me this the other night between the
[00:02:10] I'm bone yang. Okay, you sound exactly the same between
[00:02:13] I'm doing that character bone. Yeah, go ahead
[00:02:18] Between the distance between the base of the balls and the anus. It's like are you sure this isn't just Adam?
[00:02:24] This is weekend up. No, okay, we're doing okay. Listen. There's a
[00:02:28] Something Adam would know and the distance
[00:02:31] That there is a correlation between the distance. I don't want to pet you between the fuck out of the base of the balls and
[00:02:38] the anus that correlates with homo or heterosensory. Yes, and
[00:02:45] the
[00:02:47] Smaller the distance the higher correlation there is with home
[00:02:50] Homosexuality if your balls are close to your ass and your gay and on average
[00:02:56] The distance is shrinking what and a lot of people attribute it to the existence of micro plastics
[00:03:03] So do you I know this is pseudo science and I know that as bow and yang this is something that I overheard someone else say
[00:03:10] Why do you have to be booing yang? But I did take well? I thought we were having bow and yang on the show. Okay, I guys
[00:03:16] I was like he's related that Andrew Yang. I don't think so well to hold on here because I noticed they both got the same last name
[00:03:24] And on top of that they're both gay Chinese guys. I don't believe bonus Chinese
[00:03:29] Well, I guess that puts that the best and I don't believe Andrew and Andrew is by his yeah
[00:03:36] I think he's by is it or I think he's he's he's pan
[00:03:40] Sapio yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, he only folks if you're going forward. Yeah, he's only attracted to a radical centrist
[00:03:49] Yeah, anyway, I know this is my I want to have I want to have sex with the trolley from the trolley problem
[00:03:54] Mmm, I want to put your cock on the rails. There's a lever that directs the trolley into my ass
[00:04:00] That's awesome. I think that's just called bit straight and it said how come nobody's ever thought of this?
[00:04:05] Yeah, the third rail the third rail that goes into my ass third rail of politics
[00:04:10] That would be you saving the world you save both people both tracks by putting the trolley in your ass
[00:04:15] Anywhere do the trolley running over all the people and killing them and then pulling into mr. Rogers's house
[00:04:20] He's like well. Hey mr. Trolley. Yeah, we've got blood all over the trolley. He's like I don't want to talk about it
[00:04:26] Yeah, it's like I had a hard fucking day. Mr. Rogers. I always have to talk to me
[00:04:30] You can bring that blood by me. I already have the HIV antibodies
[00:04:34] Seriously, it's true. He had HIV once mr. Rogers. Yeah, he doesn't need the HIV vaccine
[00:04:40] I'm gonna be the gay guy that's taking I've remecked into prevent HIV
[00:04:45] throwing out all my prep and bear backing
[00:04:47] I've got I've remecked anyway, so yeah, why don't we have more gay conspiracy theorists? They do
[00:04:54] He's just it's impossible. There's no way that you would ever be able to hear from them
[00:04:58] Why why because I would have because it doesn't fit into people's brains
[00:05:02] When everyone's got this into my brain. Do you know who's got these little peg coal brains? Not me
[00:05:07] I'm open to everything like well the gay one does same reason you don't hear about the the anti-vax BLM protests
[00:05:13] Mm-hmm. We hear about it. No, well, I hear about it and I tell you about it against your wishes
[00:05:18] No, I'm that's because you're part. I love information. You said I already told you my wishes chocolate
[00:05:25] Chocolate River have decadence that is absolutely decadence
[00:05:29] I want silk that perhaps is made out of strawberries. Yes. No regular silk a team of oompa loompas
[00:05:35] Assisting you and you have a position
[00:05:37] Acquisition of chocolate, but they have I want fat tittin oompa loompa green hair red faces fat tits
[00:05:44] I would fuck a fat tittin oompa loompa. It'll be great of Apple. I have no question
[00:05:48] Tim Cook dies and then they get they have Tim cookie like a fat CEO. Mm-hmm. It's like the new iPhone is made out of chocolate
[00:05:57] Cost
[00:05:59] $15,000
[00:06:01] Hell yeah, all the nerds are lining up for the new the benefit as you can slowly eat it so by the time the new iPhone comes
[00:06:08] Out you've already run out. You need a new
[00:06:11] We're bringing we're bringing we're rethinking the term candy bar phone. How do they get in a way with this iPhone 13?
[00:06:17] It looks exactly like the 12. Yeah, I mean that's been the deal for the last fucking yeah
[00:06:22] What are you talking about? They're all exactly the same 11 looks different from really really 11 is like curved at least
[00:06:28] Well, you need there Apple Apple has been all the same bullshit like almost a decade
[00:06:34] Yeah, if I if there if it was not for I message I would have gotten a fucking that's literally the only thing that's locked everybody in
[00:06:40] Is I message every other piece of shit every other product I have is fucking garbage
[00:06:45] Yeah, yeah, I've been a Mac guys since I was fucking in in high school. I'm the next computer
[00:06:50] I get will be a PC. I thought you have a PC, but I mean my next laptop. I have a nice yeah
[00:06:55] My desktop's a PC. Yeah, all my zoom podcasting happens on a fucking PC. You know I'm saying personal computer
[00:07:07] Penis a little computer
[00:07:10] That sucks
[00:07:13] Putting his finger in a cat's ear that's gross feels bad
[00:07:18] She likes it look she is snuggling up to you more, but she's a fucking she cuz you're doming her
[00:07:24] She's a warden desperate for love. It's called sonning and young everywhere doing it
[00:07:31] Sunning each other. Yeah, they're calling it sonning and young are doing it to each other jamming up the education system
[00:07:40] I was gonna do my homework and then some can't buy you son me and knock into my home
[00:07:45] What did he say to you? Yeah, he called me a bitch
[00:07:47] Classic educators are wondering what they can do to refocus young and get them back on okay Charlotte
[00:07:56] We really can't have you saying that you can't be writing your own copy on his broadcast news
[00:08:02] Just read the teleprompter
[00:08:04] Albert Brooks is like I really think this story could go somewhere. I really want to produce this segment
[00:08:13] That movie
[00:08:14] Feels is like well this make a man love me. I haven't seen it. I find that movie is like one of those first half great second half
[00:08:22] boring
[00:08:23] Type of movies kind of like your dick a lot actually it's a bad movie a lot of James L
[00:08:28] Brooks movies are first half pretty good who's James L Brooks the guy that made James L
[00:08:33] Brooks that you know from the Simpsons
[00:08:36] Oh, really? Also the director and writer of broadcast news wait broadcast users. That's one of the guy's head explodes
[00:08:42] No, what is their movie about news you're thinking of scanners
[00:08:50] That
[00:08:53] David crony no no
[00:08:56] For some guys like I'm not gonna take it anymore
[00:09:00] That's network combined network and scanners
[00:09:03] That's not from I'm mad as hell. I'm not the guy's head exploded in that movie. You're literally thinking of scanners. Okay
[00:09:11] Yeah, I was gonna watch scanners recently, but I just called scanning and young
[00:09:16] Everywhere getting into it their heads are exploding young Canadian are getting into scanning each other in Toronto
[00:09:23] I didn't know that you're watching a channel seven hard R news
[00:09:47] Hard beep news and
[00:09:49] And you know although I won't be in Toronto
[00:09:53] I will be this week in Phoenix tomorrow when you're hearing this and actually today with a Toronto of Arizona today when this comes out
[00:10:00] There's a hot pantheon to go to all right and they'll be in Phoenix this weekend 14 to the 16
[00:10:07] Actually, he's gonna be in Phoenix. I will not be in penis. There is
[00:10:10] I'll be
[00:10:19] Silently
[00:10:21] Going on stage everybody clapping it dies down. He's like thanks guys for coming out
[00:10:25] You know I was fine, and then you just noticed some guys bulge in the front row and
[00:10:29] It just goes catatonic and it's rolling
[00:10:32] It's like 20 minutes and people are like stop are you okay?
[00:10:36] You're like oh, yeah, yeah, and I just do my act but
[00:10:39] Breakfast is what was I saying and then Madison? I'll be in Madison, Wisconsin from the 21st to the 23rd
[00:10:45] Dude, you know you should do is halfway Detroit and Columbus halfway through your said start plugging your dates and other cities
[00:10:51] Yeah, no, I like I like doing stand-up. Yeah
[00:10:55] And then Detroit and Columbus and then New Orleans
[00:10:58] And then also I'll be doing an hour here in New York City as part of the New York Comedy Festival at Gotham on November 10th
[00:11:05] And I tell you if you want t-shirts for the holiday season you want gifts
[00:11:09] You got to order them now because I'm fed up with the print shop and I'm going to switch to another print shop
[00:11:15] And so the store will obviously have to be down for a while and you know you want to get the orders in now
[00:11:21] So you get those in somebody owns a print shop emailed me and I will email them back and it's sort of first come first serve
[00:11:28] for a business that
[00:11:30] does about
[00:11:32] $400,000 a year in gross revenues
[00:11:36] So there's money here that nix making too much money buy your t-shirts at stavey.biz
[00:11:41] Shop it's it's evidence that the t-shirts are better
[00:11:45] I wouldn't say that I think you know we've we all want to support equally. I know this is a socialist podcast their union
[00:11:53] Uh shirts as is this as ours are mine. No, they're not
[00:11:56] Yeah, huh? How do you know that because I asked who I emailed I emailed the check what check I emailed the
[00:12:04] I emailed I talked to the guy the fucking I talked to the guys over there at the place
[00:12:09] Where is it? Where's the I thought I called them up and I asked what's his name? I fucking spoke to him
[00:12:15] I don't think you did pal. You're asking me. You did chief
[00:12:18] You're over here asking questions like I'm some kind of like, you know, like this is fucking 20 questions
[00:12:23] That's true. I am doing that people. Let's look the important thing is phoenix this weekend madison next weekend pantheon today
[00:12:31] fucking detroit columbus new orleans tamper boston
[00:12:35] It's all happening folks and I don't want to give anything away. We might be adding a little la date in
[00:12:41] December so keep your little fucking keep your little fucking ears open for that motherfucker
[00:12:46] But yeah stavey.biz slash tour
[00:12:48] Stop it that b slash I don't know merch or shop or some shit
[00:12:53] To help you know buy my mother a nice christmas gift actually if you know what a good mixer is
[00:13:00] I'm gonna buy my my my couch and I'm gonna buy her a new stand mixer for
[00:13:05] I got a nice gift for your mom. It's the standard. It's like the fight
[00:13:11] Yeah, yeah, it's the best. Oh, okay. Yeah, I want to get her the best one
[00:13:14] Get the kitchen in one get that one. You know what you say get it with the pasta attachment
[00:13:17] Well, that's what I was gonna say if you I don't know if you have a Costco membership
[00:13:19] I do then get it. Yeah get it there. Really? Yeah, I want the Cadillac nothing's too good for my mama
[00:13:26] Well, the bait the unit itself is like the same pretty much
[00:13:29] I think they only have like two sizes, but when you get it a Costco you get like the bundle attachments
[00:13:34] I fucked up by buying the Vitamix
[00:13:37] Buying any kind of vacuum. That's the shit you always want to buy if you're gonna get like one of the nice ones
[00:13:41] That's the shit you always want to buy anything goes wrong take it back
[00:13:45] Not only that but it comes with all the shit comes with it's always a bundle pack and I will also say for the record
[00:13:50] I already got a very nice gift for your mother. What did you get her? Well?
[00:13:55] For a new mother
[00:13:57] I
[00:13:59] Got her the Jewish son. She's listening to you
[00:14:03] Look my mom is more than happy you want to ever come over eat a pastry tell somebody your problems
[00:14:08] My mom will absolutely no joke. I know the starters a bit. You're all you're always welcome to come get a big hug from little v
[00:14:15] We went out for lunch with the George
[00:14:19] One day, maybe Nick was there to Nick Halky us was there too. Yes, but I think I went in for the hug after lunch
[00:14:26] And I got to tell you
[00:14:28] Incredible. It felt really nice. She's one of the best huggers of all time. She's a pair of tits
[00:14:32] They're nice mom titties your mom has a very nurturing pair of breasts
[00:14:39] They weaned me bro. You know there's some big fat ones dude if they they survived breastfeeding me
[00:14:45] Venetia if you're listening, I would love to hug you
[00:14:48] She did you're always welcome to get a hug. I'm Venetia to suck my dick. No you need to watch your
[00:14:54] That doesn't even make sense teens are saying it. No one is saying what kind of teens you ask young
[00:15:00] No, they're not all over
[00:15:03] Chicago school dish Chicago. They know my mom and Chicago. They know her and they know her well
[00:15:12] Yeah, you're welcome anytime Adam so her gift is a kind of more of a gift for myself. Yeah, it's just for man
[00:15:21] It's just for a man. You did a picture you're having sex with guys
[00:15:23] I'll take your silences. Yes. Oh, you're asking me. No
[00:15:31] I love you too. That's my answer. Thanks, man. You know, I love that. He's like he's like a Hong Kong Beijing
[00:15:39] Agitator now. He's pro Hong Kong. He's pro Beijing. What but he's from Hong Kong. I know but he's pro
[00:15:46] Gotta go. Yeah, gotta go CCP smart move Jackie. It's gonna be great. He joined the Yankees
[00:15:51] It's gonna be great. I'd be like me stop stop rooting for the Orioles to fucking roof for the Yankees
[00:15:56] Fuck that he fuck the Yankees you grew up in bean town and Southie projects now
[00:16:00] He's now is playing first maybe for the young be great if like China just goes in fuck the Red Sox
[00:16:06] decimates Taiwan and like six months by Jackie Chan doing karate. Yeah goes in there Jackie Chan
[00:16:12] He's gonna choose the whole arm. He's gonna. What do one of those fake drunk things?
[00:16:15] Yeah, and nothing is done about it. I would love to see that and I'm not saying that just despite the United States
[00:16:28] But good for China
[00:16:30] Mm-hmm China should be unified look you set yourself up is we know what you're fleeing. Yeah once the once the great war comes
[00:16:37] Lee hold on fleeing never
[00:16:39] That's a disgusting word. I would never flee anything. I'm making a choice
[00:16:45] I'm emigrating for better opportunities
[00:16:50] And we will be seeing Nick I'm moving a little way to you know moving to the lower east side of China
[00:16:56] Starting the white guy community
[00:17:00] Laundry across a fruit cart. I just yeah, I'm selling dog meat
[00:17:05] Yeah, like the Chinese like oh business is not so good. I don't tell you
[00:17:15] It was the living and lower east side China tenements
[00:17:19] Trying to sell dog meat to these Chinese but 12 white men to a room it's disgusting. Yeah, dude
[00:17:27] Everybody watching watching NFL games on their little STVs everybody huddling around. I would love that there
[00:17:33] I would love to be a an American refugee living in China and the low east side of China low
[00:17:39] Name the five oh yeah
[00:17:42] Fuckful that's my name. Fuck me the fuck gets head the Saul bellow of China
[00:17:48] That's a cool name. Yeah bellows awesome. Yeah, cuz they can't say it. That's what that's what we would do
[00:17:54] We'd move over there and choose names. Everybody's name Larry. Yeah
[00:17:57] Larry Laurent Laurent. Yeah, Lorella Lorella. Yeah, my name is Larry Lorella, Ro
[00:18:06] The Chinese cops being like let me give me your paper
[00:18:09] Let me see your paper
[00:18:12] Your Lawrence rollo if your funeral
[00:18:16] And then it's like in scanners. Yes head just fucking pops
[00:18:19] Hmm. I think you're thinking of networking you
[00:18:22] I am thinking of that work that work like he's a rocker the movie network
[00:18:27] His head bro up when he leave the name
[00:18:31] He'll eat a name. I say bro up
[00:18:34] Yeah, I'm gonna watch all those movies so broadcasting uses just a bullshit movie then broadcasting is this guy
[00:18:39] The first act is
[00:18:41] Is a watchable movie? You know what his best movie is? I'll go on the record saying please spanglish love that movie. Oh
[00:18:49] That guy made spanglish. He made spanglish. That never looked good to me
[00:18:53] And I thought that way that came out when I was fully 100% and Adam Sandler I watched it
[00:18:59] No matter what I'm doing I was with my parents at home
[00:19:02] And I also wanted to fuck phenolphic crews ever lost us or not
[00:19:05] I'm just Adam demand her to give me pussy and said Adam Sandler's Adam demand Adam demand
[00:19:20] Oh, I'll kill you. Oh, I'll kill you. Oh, I'll kill you. Yeah, that's good. He does the yelling
[00:19:36] I don't know the man for some pussy
[00:19:40] Manler pussy my my my my my my my my my my my my I think it's a pussy you can do it
[00:19:46] Yeah, I mean you should get all the guys back for an anti-vaccine pro rape
[00:19:55] Murderers row did we got Rob Schneider Rob Schneider would 100% be there
[00:20:00] I don't think Jim Brewer would be there. Yeah, that guy fucking rules
[00:20:15] We get grandma's boy guy. Oh grandma's boy guy. Yeah, no one knows that guy's name
[00:20:20] I don't even think he has name here with the guy who played the boss
[00:20:23] No, the main guy and grandma's boy
[00:20:25] Who's also next horses a secondary character, but he's also invited who's the main guy and grandma's boy the guy
[00:20:32] The grandma's boy next words
[00:20:37] Next words that lives with his parents and raised car bed in that movie. Yeah. Oh, no, but the guy's naked the guy the loin cloth
[00:20:43] The naked. Oh, that's his site. No, that's why I was thinking of but you're right. There's another guy loin clause guy
[00:20:49] He was gay and big daddy. He had a he was gay and big daddy, right and another movie had a big cock
[00:20:57] Okay, I remember he was like pissing next Adam Sandler and Adam Sandler was like well
[00:21:01] He was like maybe his his girlfriend
[00:21:05] And he was like
[00:21:09] Movies brought to you by cushy dreams
[00:21:11] Yes, it is which Adam you want to rifle through that stack of papers over there cushy dreams are
[00:21:18] Appreciate the beauty of autumn
[00:21:21] It was nice. I got back. I got off the plane yesterday and I was like, oh, it's fall out this bitch
[00:21:26] I had a real cozy day got some apple cider
[00:21:29] Cushy dreams smoke your CBD because you can come on man. That's the closure
[00:21:34] No, that's their slogan. They're blowing it. You open it with a slogan you close it with the slogan. You don't know
[00:21:41] You say it at the end for fucking for effect. Listen, especially a slogan that good. You want to blow your watch
[00:21:50] All right, I listen, I don't want to fucking I don't want to go Joe Joe slogan Joe slogan. He's like
[00:21:56] I don't know I tell you what man. I'm loving it. Yeah. Yeah, you can have it your way
[00:22:02] You got a lot of guys, you know a lot of guys in this league
[00:22:06] So do you look at the look at you in the eye and they'll tell you about about Bob Bob?
[00:22:14] The saying you know should you get the vaccine? Yeah, if you're in a higher risk group certainly but if you're under the age of
[00:22:20] 40 and you're an athlete you're in shape then
[00:22:25] Fuck we'll leave the light on for you
[00:22:27] Then when you're here your family we got the meats
[00:22:33] Where's the beef I'll tell you where it is in these mystery experimental vaccines. Yeah
[00:22:39] I'll tell you what brother. I'll tell you what brother
[00:22:41] We got Milo Yiannopoulos on the show and he is one double a beep beep
[00:22:47] MCO if you know what I'm talking about double a
[00:22:50] Yeah, so anyway done that before listen
[00:22:58] For sure did I do it? Yes, and then Adam just copied it right now
[00:23:02] I just said beep beep MCO and then you remember that you could also be there's a hundred percent chance Nick's done that before
[00:23:09] That's a famous
[00:23:10] Funny cuz now I'm like I'm in a debilitated state. I have dementia
[00:23:13] I don't remember anything and like the notebook Adam's just reading me my own jokes back. But pretending came up with all this
[00:23:24] I'm in a wheelchair with an and it's wrote up to my neck and I'm scared and I'm like I don't remember anything and I
[00:23:31] You wrote all these jokes you loved me because I was the funniest guy you'd ever met and I kiss you I kiss you
[00:23:37] I you mean like not give me the fucking the
[00:23:40] the
[00:23:42] Your private crypto keys
[00:23:45] Regular horses penis
[00:23:55] Okay, they specialize in extraordinary CBD rich hemp flower aka but
[00:24:01] joins and there are two options for those you get a point five roll pre roll
[00:24:06] Or you got a three point five back in the field. Okay, you didn't up to yawn. It's pretty interesting stuff
[00:24:12] Oh, I'm yawning cuz of out of pleasure. Okay. Well, I do that too
[00:24:17] Sometimes and they do a three point five vacuum seal. I don't remember doing this way. Okay
[00:24:23] Join the group of
[00:24:27] Okay, you don't commit enough
[00:24:32] Doing it good enough
[00:24:34] You have to want to it. You have to want it as bad as you want to Nick is honored a baby mama
[00:24:40] Yeah, Nick is honoring these honoring dezy cult who lay down a beautiful baby
[00:24:46] Justin should do
[00:24:51] Black
[00:24:58] Kiss and love a baby
[00:25:00] Guys you can join the group of adults who are sick of vapes and gummies and want to smoke their CBD and it ships to all
[00:25:08] I hate I hate fuck babies fuck gummies
[00:25:12] Fuck that kind of shit. I'm a fucking man. I smoke my fucking CBD
[00:25:17] And I don't say this to a lot of people
[00:25:19] But I'm on fucking probation and I don't like breaking the law and you can legally get this stuff in the mail
[00:25:26] That's right. There is no I have an ankle bracelet on right now
[00:25:31] Attum was chargedness because you can Adam was charged with
[00:25:35] voyeurism at the planet fitness
[00:25:38] Men's locker room, which he was allowed to be in but he was looking so hornily. It was a crime
[00:25:43] Men's bathroom at the YMCA and they had a pair of binoculars that were cartoonishly extended
[00:25:49] With with they had to look rickety wheels on the end
[00:25:52] And they were facing out of the window from the bathroom at the boy's school
[00:25:57] I know I was in the ladies locker room
[00:25:59] masturbating looking through the porkies hole at the
[00:26:02] Yeah, and what I got in trouble for is being in the ladies and you're like your honor. I'm gay your honor. I was being gay
[00:26:13] Your honor trial of a century
[00:26:15] The trial of the century arrested for being in the ladies locker room, but defending himself
[00:26:21] Prosser gonna say well, I'm gonna put him in jail for being gay
[00:26:25] But you didn't charge him with that
[00:26:28] It's double jeopardy. It's double jeopardy
[00:26:31] And that is what that movie should have been about
[00:26:34] It looks like high quality movie anytime recently. No, I haven't seen really fucking bad dude. It's very funny to watch
[00:26:40] but do they fuck
[00:26:42] uh morgan freeman no fucking tommy lee jones and morgan freeman and
[00:26:48] Very hot dude
[00:26:50] Put it in my ass put it in my mouth put it in my ear. I want you to fuck every hole on my body
[00:26:55] I wanted you to fuck every hole on my body
[00:26:59] I don't I can't do tommy lee jones to that was supposed to be you're good at that was
[00:27:05] I can't fear his voice in my head. So I don't know what like
[00:27:08] You can do it looks like high quality marijuana
[00:27:12] It feels like high quality marijuana and guess what it tastes like high quality
[00:27:17] The CBD content is up to 20 percent, which is some of the wow in the
[00:27:23] Holy fuck
[00:27:23] Tells noticeable in every single beautiful flower you're getting your smoke your CBD
[00:27:29] It is the most efficient and quickest way to deliver a CBD into your system
[00:27:33] So don't shoot it up. Don't eat some fucking candies like a fuck. What are you a little fucking girl?
[00:27:40] Don't vape it like you're some sort of fag
[00:27:44] Um, it does not get you hot. I'm vaping
[00:27:48] Yeah, that's what you sound like when you don't vape
[00:27:51] Vape
[00:27:52] Don't buy fucking CBD from the people that give us money. That's what you sound. It does not get you high
[00:27:58] There is next to no to you. It makes you feel nice, but it makes you feel real noise
[00:28:02] I'm bringing back saying noise guys. No, you're not. You never said I used to say noise a lot
[00:28:09] I'm gonna test this out for a couple weeks. Say just a noise
[00:28:13] Um, anyway, independent lab testing shows the compliance and purity. It's grown in California and Oregon
[00:28:19] And that's where the best shit comes from legal high
[00:28:23] His head is hand selected by a team of experienced cannibal
[00:28:27] Can cannabis flower experts that are all legal immigrants. I am sure
[00:28:34] Alternate for people looking to cut back on smoking other things don't forget like pole
[00:28:40] It mixes well with other things
[00:28:43] Each batch is you know, I said like pole like pole like cock
[00:28:48] There's three lines
[00:28:50] Private ultra premium and premium which are indoor outdoor
[00:28:54] There are also three experiences that you that for your desired effects
[00:29:00] And those are relaxed piece create hustle energy dream. I like to mix them all up and really
[00:29:06] I'm gonna relax on the dream guy. I like to make some all make a nice salad of them
[00:29:11] And uh take you know open up my tear my tear die
[00:29:16] I'm also the three your asshole. Yeah, my turdi my
[00:29:20] My my my brown my brown my brown hole
[00:29:25] Um, they're pre-roll CBD joints that also come in all those different flavors
[00:29:31] So go to cushy dreams.com spelled k u s h y dreams and check out use promo to
[00:29:38] promo code promo code come town for 20 percent off your same your first order smoke your
[00:29:45] CBD because you came wow
[00:29:48] And that landed the plane with grace and that is how sully
[00:29:53] Had a cushy dream
[00:29:59] More than the kids favorite kind of CBD
[00:30:02] It was what my had a cushy dream used to chief but one day in Selma, Alabama
[00:30:08] Why why fucking kids and black kids get high together?
[00:30:13] fake weed
[00:30:14] Now that lets you from tally
[00:30:27] The fucking crossover of the century
[00:30:32] Yeah, tally and fucking
[00:30:41] Man tally was awesome. They brought him back
[00:30:44] Really? Dude, I watched one of the newer south parks randy's still they've rebranded the show where it's just called
[00:30:50] Tagrity farms or whatever and it's like it's about randy's weed farm. Oh, yeah randy goes into weed now
[00:30:56] Wait, wait south park is yeah south park is just called tagrity. I mean, it's called south park
[00:31:00] But tagrity like the show starts off and the intro is just tagrity farm
[00:31:04] I mean, I'm also I barely pay attention anything so that I'm just confused as to what's out of it
[00:31:08] It might have been one episode. It's still funny or no. It was a couple episodes. Oh interesting. It's still funny
[00:31:13] They still got it. They got tally. They got tally is his business partner
[00:31:18] Oh, I thought they were gonna make him join the tally band. Oh, tally
[00:31:24] That's all straight character. Dude, what?
[00:31:26] And then also mr. Dude. What was the fucking piece of shit's name? Uh, mr
[00:31:30] Dookie the christmas pew mr. Hanky mr. Hanky. Mr. Hanky. I love him and he loves me
[00:31:37] He loves you those characters were like originally like supposed to be ironic or some shit
[00:31:41] I don't know, but I think they were perfect for children because that's when that third and fourth grade where that
[00:31:46] Well tree parker matt stone. I think that that was all because that was like the first episode is mr
[00:31:50] Hanky
[00:31:51] That's the first episode of south park. Yeah, it's early on so that was like they were
[00:31:55] They were probably both like probably 13 and 14 years old when they wrote that nice
[00:32:00] Yeah, because the show has been on since they were in middle school. Yeah
[00:32:05] They're actually around our age. They're about our age
[00:32:11] It is wild how like I mean, yes season one episode nine you can check in that and that show and it's still good for a waff here and there
[00:32:17] Yeah, I guess because it didn't have like the kind of precipitous decline that that the simpsons did family
[00:32:23] Well, it's been the same guys the whole time. It's been the same guys the whole time, but it's just yeah, it's impressive how much
[00:32:30] You know
[00:32:31] There's there's like 30 seasons of that show and I think they've been fairly immune to uh
[00:32:38] Sorry to bring up this term, but yeah canceled culture
[00:32:42] Because it's the only show that is worth the shit on and that viacom has it all. Yeah
[00:32:49] Yeah, I think that they're really still allowed to go there
[00:32:52] I
[00:32:54] Yeah, and they actually do too because the one episode I watched or just like shitting all over china
[00:33:00] I mean, it's not even like it's not it's funny because you know, you know, you know, I can talk about like the the shappell thing
[00:33:05] Which I didn't watch and I barely know what people are mad about but like
[00:33:09] you know
[00:33:10] like if
[00:33:11] Because the south park has been consistent where they they are but like, you know, I guess you call it a libertarian show to a certain extent
[00:33:18] but certainly about like caring about like
[00:33:20] Pre speech if you do within the context of comedy. It's like the biggest threat really is
[00:33:27] to degree in which like
[00:33:30] Companies are beholden to the fucking
[00:33:32] Government of china now. I mean it's the fucking the marvel shit the NBA shit is insane
[00:33:37] I mean, that's like fucking true. Yeah, darrell mori the most chilling thing
[00:33:41] I've seen in the last couple of years with regards to speech is just that john cena video
[00:33:45] We're him speaking fluent mandarin and apologizing for saying that Taiwan was not a part of
[00:33:51] Wait, that's real. Yeah, you haven't seen that. No, I thought that was a joke. I saw john
[00:33:56] I know the show. I thought it was like a deep fake of somebody with john cena's
[00:33:59] No, this is real. That's real. Oh, no, I did not know about this. Yeah, does he know how to speak chinese?
[00:34:04] I guess he had to they had to fucking teach him. Yeah, he had to fucking apologize for
[00:34:10] Wow, that sucks. What is that so sorry? Yeah, he's like, uh, nihao
[00:34:14] Uh, you you kind of sue me at ch ch ch ch ch
[00:34:27] Well, maybe I mean I wouldn't know it was a deep fake or not. I guess um, but yeah, I just assumed that
[00:34:33] Yeah, no, they were they were shooting all over. Uh, you know china, which is good
[00:34:38] Yeah
[00:34:39] Which is your approach
[00:34:40] I am pro china, but it's also you know, if if i've i've abandoned
[00:34:46] Carrying about free expression anymore. Yeah, I don't give a fuck if people don't people don't want it being pro
[00:34:53] Survival
[00:34:55] That should be your number one priority is being a weasel and figuring out where rat yeah, exactly like a little rat
[00:35:02] Well, it was me. I'm a i'm a fat little fucking
[00:35:04] I'm cute i'm a cuter little weasel and i'm probably you're having too good at time to jump on the right ship
[00:35:12] Because I mean little nuts the whole time and i'm getting a little chipmunk pussy
[00:35:17] You're a pig being fucked by not a pig you are you're a pig you've had your hooves removed
[00:35:23] No, you're being used for sexual pleasure by the chinese army. No, I'm not there you are
[00:35:28] They would have people to fuck. Thank you very much. They wouldn't fuck pigs
[00:35:31] Now they have a pig that they're and i it's not me. We're using rat. We're using rodent analogies
[00:35:36] You're a little rat that survives and you're a pig. I'm a fat little chipmunk. You're a
[00:35:41] You're a gay rat. You're a jewish person. We told you we're using your mouse
[00:35:46] I say I say i'm a chipmunk nixarat your mouse nix is i'm a pig you're a Jew
[00:36:01] I mr. Hanky the christmas poo. He loves me. I love you. God that shit used to hit so hard
[00:36:08] You played episode of south park for the last half of my god, of course we should
[00:36:11] Through the through the speaker. How do you know what the fuck?
[00:36:21] Is that real?
[00:36:24] He's being perfect Chinese. He's doing a weird thing with his voice
[00:36:42] Remembering how to speak Chinese. I think he already spoke Chinese. What the fuck?
[00:36:48] No, he's just memorizing. John Cena is very sorry for saying Taiwan is a country. That's wild, dude.
[00:36:55] Yeah. John Cena is pretty Chinese. I think he's just remembering it. That's how I did with
[00:37:02] my bar mitzvah portion. I don't know the words I was saying. I just remember the sounds.
[00:37:09] Let me see. It says that he learned Mandarin while he was in the WWE to help the company.
[00:37:16] He's quest to break into the Chinese market. Wow. That's wild. Good for him, dude.
[00:37:22] That should have been a part of the movie The Wrestling. That should have been his comeback.
[00:37:27] Randy the Ram Lawrence Chinese. I learned myself this fucking chick language so we could go big in China
[00:37:33] and maybe I could get my fucking daughter back.
[00:37:35] I'm going to watch that to beat off to Marissa Tobi.
[00:37:46] That's a great movie. Let's listen to Quiet Ride for the last time.
[00:37:54] I had a big quiet ride phase. Yeah, everybody did. It's called being a teenager.
[00:37:58] I don't think everybody did, man. Adam, do you have a quiet ride phase?
[00:38:02] No, I was listening to Bach's concertos. Shut the fuck up. No, of course I listened to that.
[00:38:09] Did you? That should have left. That should have ruled. I guess I'm just I just guess. Yeah.
[00:38:18] My friends were into gay emo shit or they were into like I was also into that.
[00:38:26] Or they were black people. So nobody I really didn't have any friends. I felt I felt like
[00:38:30] a very unique and having a fucking quiet riot phase. But I guess I just having the white American
[00:38:37] teenagers experience. Yeah, I remember there was like probably like 15 years ago. It was on New
[00:38:43] Year's quiet ride played in the Old Town Brewery in Gaithersburg. Oh fuck.
[00:38:51] Oh, we played like stadiums in the 80s. Yeah. I don't know if you've ever been to the Old Town
[00:38:55] Brewery, but I have. Didn't Erwin used to show there. Did he? I don't know maybe.
[00:39:00] But you know it's not it's like barely a venue. It sucks. Yeah. Well, it's nice.
[00:39:05] Maybe I'm thinking of a different place. I remember they had girls rock your boys.
[00:39:08] They had girls rock your boys. That place that place like changed ownership.
[00:39:13] So many times it was like a bunch of different restaurants. Maybe one of them called smokers or
[00:39:18] some shit. Growlers. Growlers. Yeah. That's where I was. Yeah. Growlers was the name of it for a while.
[00:39:24] So yeah, I have been there. I did an open mic there. Yeah, they had. So mean quiet riot before the
[00:39:28] same place. I remember seeing that at the time being like that can't be right fucking quiet.
[00:39:34] Damn. I didn't realize that the vocalist name was Jizzy Pearl.
[00:39:41] No, it's not spelled J-I-Z. J-Z Pearl. Come on. Suck my dick.
[00:39:50] Jizzy Pearl. Real name James Wilkinson is American Vocalist.
[00:39:55] What languages does John Cena speak? English, Mandarin Chinese.
[00:39:59] That's awesome. Yeah. It's only speak two languages. It's very funny.
[00:40:04] Boy, I only speak two languages. There's only speak two languages and one of them is Chinese
[00:40:07] and you're John Cena. Yeah, there you go. You'd think he would speak Italian or French or something.
[00:40:11] You got to suck my fucking little piece. Oh, so the original singer was Kevin Dubrow who died
[00:40:18] of cocaine overdose and then had a call in Jizzy Pearl. Gotta go to the bullpen.
[00:40:25] Gotta go to the bullpen.
[00:40:56] Hey, what now Matt, I didn't go to that show at the old town. You fucked up, bro.
[00:41:00] That show is a rock.
[00:41:30] I'm not gonna lie, I'm gonna lie, I'm gonna rock it till it strikes.
[00:41:40] Mac Weldon, I don't know what happened. Mac Weldon is brought to you by some cushy dreams.
[00:41:50] It was just getting good. Adam, do you want to get the,
[00:41:54] do us a favor? Get your little piece of paper out. Adam, do you want to get your little piece of
[00:42:00] paper out? Well, I was reading about the death. All right, I was reading about the death.
[00:42:06] Yes, I do. Wait, what happened? There's an echo, I think.
[00:42:21] There we go. Okay. Here we are. I fixed it. Very good work.
[00:42:25] Mac Weldon brought to you by Def Leppard. All right, Mac Weldon.
[00:42:32] Is this the hurry up? You're running out of time. Is this the appropriate
[00:42:37] copy? Yeah, that date. I printed it out. Okay.
[00:42:46] You're a busy guy. Stop thinking about what you wear and just embrace the radically efficient
[00:42:52] Mac Weldon best song. The smoke cigarettes. The smoke's in the fucking city. The daily wear
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[00:43:09] These are the most stylish but that's the short underwear and beyond.
[00:43:15] Mac Weldon makes it easy for you to dress or works leisure and play wherever you're
[00:43:22] in the summer or in autumn, I guess this is the case.
[00:43:52] To it.
[00:44:07] Adam is the reason you stopped doing your job. It was too loud. We probably shouldn't have
[00:44:13] copyrighted songs over the ads. So there are plenty of copyrighted songs. You think these
[00:44:18] guys are punk rock? Do you think they never copyrighted shit? A couple of cool punk rockers like Def
[00:44:23] Leppard would go after some of them. One of the most punk bands ever. Would go after somebody for
[00:44:28] something as cool as including their music and a read for men's. They're bad. They're
[00:44:34] probably too late for love. Many of Mac Weldon's products are some of our favorites. Stavros,
[00:44:40] are you wearing a pair right now? I'm actually not today. I'm free-balling. He's free-balling today.
[00:44:46] Usually I do wear Mac Weldon's and I gotta say they hug my cock like you wouldn't fucking believe.
[00:44:52] Nick's got him on right now. He's got a big pubes sticking out of him.
[00:44:55] No, that's a thread for my pants. I know, but I was, you know, it's my pants off for comedic
[00:44:59] effects. Thawing apart because they're not made by Mac Weldon. That's right. They're made by Levi's.
[00:45:04] You can see Nick's little ass cock through his jeans but not his underwear. Here's the nice
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[00:45:25] Aeropostal pair of pants and then a limited two t-shirt. No, that would be humiliating and
[00:45:32] embarrassing. That's why I am draped in all designer and that designer is Mac Weldon.
[00:45:38] Yeah. You know, for the ultimate lazy Sunday, I like to wear their Ace Sweat shorts, which
[00:45:43] is a sexual sweatshorts. Which are asexual. Yeah. And they've been perfect if you're not getting
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[00:46:05] For the high tech, highly, highly packable that are the perfect high tech, highly packable combo.
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[00:46:34] radically efficient. Why don't you talk about the website and how easy it is to log on?
[00:46:38] The website is incredibly easy to log on. So you can put in www.macweldon.com. You can also search
[00:46:46] Mac Weldon into your preferred search browser, Google, whatever it may be. What else you think
[00:46:53] it might be Safari Bing, whatever. Yeah, the Safari. Is there a difference when people use these?
[00:46:59] Doc. Go. Doc. Go. Alt-a-vis search engine. You have to use if you want to look up fucking
[00:47:06] misinformation. Oh, right. Doc. Go. Yeah. They don't go there. If you Google like vaccines on
[00:47:11] Doc. Go. The only place you'll find the truth is Doc. Go. Yeah. Too late. Too late. And once again,
[00:47:20] rest in peace to Kevin Dubrow, the original singer of the band Quiet Riot, who overdosed on
[00:47:29] Kewe. Look up Def Luppert and see if we can email them and get them on the show. Okay,
[00:47:33] that would be awesome. I'm gonna look up. I'm gonna Google right now. We had that one guy.
[00:47:37] That was named Brett Lejandra from the Jackass series.
[00:47:44] Mr. Jackass himself. Yeah, we had that guy. We should get more guys like for the kids.
[00:47:52] We're trying to break into a younger audience. We figured we had some kind of crossover. Yeah,
[00:47:57] Def Luppert. Stuff kids are into rather than, you know, this is a lot of old guys listening to
[00:48:03] this. It shows about we got Dean Martin on and stuff and Steve Allen. We should get Gene Beck.
[00:48:11] Yeah, the comedian has been on the show more than anybody's Dick Gregory.
[00:48:16] Man's election. Honestly, we literally should just get Gene D'Nappoli back.
[00:48:22] Honestly, he just Gene D'Nappoli and Def Luppert on the show. Gene D'Nappoli and Doug
[00:48:26] the gene for a full hour of Dev Lippert's three more. We had everything they wanted, but from
[00:48:31] New York, we're Italian and we're Elvis. Gene is, Gene is so down.
[00:48:36] All to come back on the show. Yeah, that's one of the best things ever. He's the fucking King,
[00:48:42] brother. We had everything they wanted. Honestly, when I met him, I was happy for like the next three.
[00:48:48] I cherished that part of my fucking life around so much more than anything else. It was the
[00:48:55] best day, one of the best days of my entire life. It's really funny. Anyway, the current members
[00:49:01] are some guy named Joe Elliott, Rick Savage. I mean, these all seem like original guys. They have a
[00:49:06] guy named Phil Collin. Yeah, Phil Collins was in Def Lippert. No, I'd Phil Collins, Phil Collin.
[00:49:14] Phil Collin, my dick. And Rick Allen,
[00:49:18] and Vivian Campbell and guitars and backing vocals. Is that a bitch named Vivian or a British
[00:49:24] guy named Vivian? I think around 30 to 40% of British men are named Vivian. It's a very common
[00:49:33] name. It's definitely British. They're from, yeah, they're from Northern England. They're from
[00:49:42] their Yorkshire boys. Yeah, it's a guy named Vivian. And I believe Rick Allen, the one-armed guy,
[00:49:46] is still in. Yeah, dude. He learned how to jump with his feet. That's one of the most
[00:49:50] all-
[00:49:52] all-panel inspiring stories of all fucking time. That guy, you know that guy, Tony Ioni
[00:49:58] from Sabbath, he's missing the tips of his fingers. He can still shred.
[00:50:06] A butchering accent. He can still shred. That's so inspirational. That's a guy missing his
[00:50:11] fucking arm and drumming is so much more inspirational. They're both inspirations.
[00:50:17] It's not even in the same stratosphere of inspiration. That's like saying a guy, okay,
[00:50:24] there's a Jewish guy with a dick you can barely see. There's a Greek guy with a
[00:50:30] small but regular penis. Yeah, it's a little inspiring that I fuck, but it's very
[00:50:35] very- But it's not like you fucking with your microscopic cock.
[00:50:40] You said at first age, you were a guy. Well, it was you. I also also said a Greek guy.
[00:50:45] Okay. We were talking about it. So I'm Tony Ioni and you're the guy from
[00:50:49] Deflepper when it comes to Cox of Cox. So I guess I'm Warren's brave.
[00:50:53] You are. Yeah. All right. I'll take it. I'll take it.
[00:50:56] So much smaller to be clear. I'll take it.
[00:50:59] Your dick is smaller in a major way. I'll take that.
[00:51:04] So yeah, Mac Logan, come tell me that you can go to the phones and hit up.
[00:51:09] No, you have nine call 98 Rock call called 98 Rock. All right.
[00:51:14] You're rocking to request Deflepper and say I think that
[00:51:19] Stavros has the bigger dick or I think Adam is the bigger day.
[00:51:23] Let him know what you let him know that Adams dick is an inspiration because it's so small
[00:51:27] and request Deflepper.
[00:51:31] And then and if you want to buy underwear,
[00:51:33] or you want to buy basics with nice fabrics, they got sweats shorts t-shirts,
[00:51:40] silver knit polos, radius shorts. They got it all.
[00:51:44] Oh my God. And it's all at Mac Weldon dot com slash com town 20.
[00:51:50] It's a fucking steel, honestly. It is the best deal in America.
[00:51:57] Without question.
[00:51:57] I wanted to talk about it. It was probably second cock.
[00:52:04] I you know what I watched. I had never watched in my life,
[00:52:08] except like one episode here and there.
[00:52:11] I watched entourage.
[00:52:14] What? It was really good.
[00:52:16] You'd never watched the first six episodes yesterday.
[00:52:20] You got to watch the whole thing. I'm going to. It's so good.
[00:52:23] I've watched the entire series and I didn't even try to watch the entire show.
[00:52:28] What do you mean Adam type of show?
[00:52:30] It's you know, it's about friends in the entertainment industry and that's,
[00:52:33] you know, like a young man like yourself. You're like, this is going to be us one day.
[00:52:36] We're all going to be managers and agents.
[00:52:39] They show you that in Hebrew school.
[00:52:41] There are types of parasites.
[00:52:43] They show you identify personally with Vinny Chase, the leader of the man.
[00:52:47] No, no, no.
[00:52:48] I am Queens Boulevard.
[00:52:50] No, you identify with penis chase.
[00:52:52] That's true.
[00:52:54] You love to chase cock.
[00:52:55] Yeah, he's chasing us.
[00:52:57] Sorry guys.
[00:53:00] Penis Chase is who you are.
[00:53:02] I'm Vinny Chase.
[00:53:03] Hey Adam, that movie is Snowpiercer.
[00:53:05] Do you wish you were in it?
[00:53:06] But it was called penis soccer.
[00:53:09] You were the digital or penis.
[00:53:11] You're the guy that merely has to make it to the front of the train.
[00:53:13] The soccer conductor is cock.
[00:53:16] No, I don't wish that.
[00:53:17] Is that what you mean?
[00:53:18] I don't wish that.
[00:53:19] Are you sure you don't wish that?
[00:53:20] No, not for a second.
[00:53:21] I don't wish that.
[00:53:22] Hey Adam, Chiu-Chiu.
[00:53:25] Your trains arriving.
[00:53:26] No, it's not.
[00:53:27] Your trains here.
[00:53:28] I have never thought of that before.
[00:53:30] Yeah, you have to create distractions until you get sucked up.
[00:53:32] That is absurd.
[00:53:33] Ed Wood's cock at the front of the train.
[00:53:34] The movie starts off and it's a box car to Auschwitz.
[00:53:37] Ed Wood.
[00:53:38] Is that his name?
[00:53:39] There's whispers going around.
[00:53:40] Yes it is.
[00:53:41] They're like, I think they're taking us all to a concentration camp to gas and kill us.
[00:53:46] They're like,
[00:53:47] breathe well, we have to figure out a way to stop the train. And Adam's like, what if somebody,
[00:53:51] I got sucked in the conductor?
[00:53:53] Sucks the conductor's dead.
[00:53:54] I thought I saw what he was doing with him.
[00:53:56] And they're like, all right, well Bon Voyage, an even goes from car to car.
[00:54:01] And he gets the next car.
[00:54:02] He gets the next car.
[00:54:03] He gets the next car.
[00:54:04] And there's a rough rabbi.
[00:54:05] There's a buff rabbi at the front of the front.
[00:54:06] He's like, you're going to go up to this school.
[00:54:08] Oh, what?
[00:54:09] You suck my dick first.
[00:54:11] Wait, the rabbi was behind the Holocaust?
[00:54:12] Ed Harris, Ed Harris.
[00:54:14] Yeah, Ed Wood was the like B movie director guy.
[00:54:17] You saying somebody's trying to suck the conductor's dick?
[00:54:20] That's Ed Harris.
[00:54:21] Yeah, that sounds a lot like the Iraq.
[00:54:23] No, it's I'm Ed Harris.
[00:54:24] Is it Ed Harris at the front?
[00:54:26] I'm Chinese.
[00:54:28] You saying I'm Chinese?
[00:54:31] Isn't there somebody named Wood?
[00:54:32] Yeah, Ed Wood was Ed Wood.
[00:54:34] He was like a director of like bad movies.
[00:54:39] That's not who I'm thinking of.
[00:54:41] You're thinking of Ed Harris.
[00:54:42] I am, but is there contemporary actor named something Wood?
[00:54:45] Elijah Wood.
[00:54:47] No.
[00:54:50] Reverend Evan H.
[00:54:51] Rachel Wood.
[00:54:52] Maybe.
[00:54:54] You know that guy Evan Rachel Wood.
[00:55:01] You probably suck Ed Harris's cock.
[00:55:03] Me?
[00:55:04] No.
[00:55:12] I believe you did.
[00:55:14] Hey Adam, did you ever wish you were in that movie phone booth?
[00:55:19] Instead of a phone, it's a guy's dick.
[00:55:21] Yeah.
[00:55:22] It's actually, and you're in there sucking on it.
[00:55:25] They're like, please come out and you're negotiating with the police for two hours.
[00:55:29] With what cock in your mouth.
[00:55:30] You're negotiating through sign language.
[00:55:33] So you're trying to make me stop sucking the penis.
[00:55:39] Yeah, that's what it's about.
[00:55:41] And they have snipers on the Holocaust is on the other line.
[00:55:45] And he's trying to suck it off.
[00:55:47] That's noble if he's trying to stop the Holocaust by second cock.
[00:55:50] Do you think anyone ever sees an Indian woman, you know, with a bindi?
[00:55:57] Like a red dot on her forehead?
[00:55:58] Yeah.
[00:55:59] And then like, that's what God's called the bindi.
[00:56:01] Bindi tackles her because he thinks it's sniper.
[00:56:03] Because it thinks it's sniper.
[00:56:04] That sounds more racist than the dot.
[00:56:07] Bindi?
[00:56:07] Bindi is the right word.
[00:56:09] I think it sounds cute.
[00:56:10] This little bindi on her head.
[00:56:12] I mean, in that context, yeah.
[00:56:13] What the hell is that?
[00:56:14] You got a little fucking bindi.
[00:56:16] You only got a bindi here.
[00:56:17] A booty bindi booty.
[00:56:19] Booty bindi boot.
[00:56:20] They're called dots.
[00:56:21] All right.
[00:56:23] They're a little respectful.
[00:56:24] Bindi head does sound racist as hell.
[00:56:27] Yeah.
[00:56:27] I mean, I mean, sure.
[00:56:29] So does the other option.
[00:56:30] But, you know, I'm sure at least one time someone's just tackled an Indian woman.
[00:56:37] So I just saved her life.
[00:56:39] That's why I thought a sniper was trying to shoot you in the heart.
[00:56:42] He says, Simpson's joke where the bark is like a laser pointer.
[00:56:45] And he's putting it on principal scinner's crotch.
[00:56:48] And he's like, oh, it seems there's a red dot on my pants.
[00:56:52] I guess the natural thing to do would be to remove them.
[00:56:54] Yeah.
[00:56:55] Yeah.
[00:56:59] Let's go ahead.
[00:57:00] Let's watch.
[00:57:00] Let's think about.
[00:57:01] Let's just think about what are our favorite Simpson's jokes for.
[00:57:07] You got anything on him?
[00:57:09] Favorite joke?
[00:57:10] I can't really.
[00:57:11] Nothing's really coming to mind on the spot.
[00:57:13] I liked when Auto crashed the bus and they were on the island.
[00:57:17] Doss bus.
[00:57:18] Great episode.
[00:57:18] And go banana.
[00:57:20] His Martin or one of the I think it's Martin.
[00:57:23] And he's like, I'm so hungry.
[00:57:24] I could eat at RBs.
[00:57:27] I used to think I was really funny when I was a kid, even though I thought
[00:57:30] RBs was delicious.
[00:57:32] Oh, wow.
[00:57:33] So you let Hollywood media tell you how to think.
[00:57:36] I let the Jews who wrote that episode.
[00:57:39] Tell me what to think of RBs.
[00:57:41] Sam, which you could dip.
[00:57:44] I've never had RBs in my life.
[00:57:46] I've had it like twice.
[00:57:48] I thought you just said as a kid you thought it was tasty.
[00:57:50] I had it as a kid twice and I liked it both times.
[00:57:55] Were you a McDonald's family?
[00:57:57] I'm still a McDonald's family.
[00:57:58] You too, bro.
[00:58:00] I've been having McDonald's a lot recently.
[00:58:02] Really? What's your order?
[00:58:03] It's just fucking good.
[00:58:05] I've been ordering breakfast.
[00:58:08] Like Uber eating.
[00:58:10] Really?
[00:58:11] Yeah.
[00:58:12] That's wild.
[00:58:13] That's that's uh...
[00:58:15] You wake up one day.
[00:58:16] You want that Mac breakfast?
[00:58:17] Just go walk and get half-
[00:58:18] Yeah, but what if you got 15 minutes?
[00:58:20] I walk past McDonald's and they almost got a lot of time.
[00:58:22] What if you got 15 minutes before what?
[00:58:25] You don't have a job.
[00:58:26] Before breakfast closes.
[00:58:27] No, I'm just saying.
[00:58:28] I see.
[00:58:28] You know what I'm saying?
[00:58:30] All right.
[00:58:30] And then you can just go and grub hub and get you...
[00:58:33] Adam, you know that movie The Ghosts in the Darkness?
[00:58:36] Do you wish you were in it?
[00:58:37] I don't know that.
[00:58:37] What's that movie?
[00:58:38] And it's called The Dick and the Penis.
[00:58:41] The Dick in the Penis.
[00:58:42] Sir Robert Beaumont played by you as behind schedule
[00:58:45] on a railroad to Africa.
[00:58:47] He's enlisted, noted engineer John Henry Patterson.
[00:58:50] I've never heard of this movie.
[00:58:52] To write the ship at Beaumont expects results.
[00:58:55] And everything seems great until the crew discovers the mutilated penis.
[00:58:58] What does it have to do with the Dick in the Penis?
[00:59:01] Assuming they're killed by a lion.
[00:59:03] Oh, did we watch that movie one time?
[00:59:07] The ghosts in the room?
[00:59:08] Hey, you're old, please?
[00:59:08] Maybe.
[00:59:09] Yeah, there's a lion.
[00:59:10] Who's in it?
[00:59:11] Multipenancy.
[00:59:13] Chris, Multipen, and Val Keller.
[00:59:15] Or did I watch that back in the day when I first moved here?
[00:59:20] I watched the Val Kilmer documentary recently.
[00:59:23] Very sad.
[00:59:25] I just watched the episode of Entourage where he plays the weed guru.
[00:59:30] Yeah.
[00:59:31] He's lost his ability to talk.
[00:59:33] He can't talk anymore.
[00:59:35] He is.
[00:59:35] You ever going to get it back?
[00:59:37] No, he speaks.
[00:59:39] He has to like cover the hole and using like dongling.
[00:59:42] Yeah.
[00:59:43] Yeah, he's fucked up.
[00:59:44] Wait, who said?
[00:59:45] Val Kilmer lost his voice.
[00:59:46] Yeah.
[00:59:47] How?
[00:59:48] He was on tour.
[00:59:51] He wrote a one man show about Mark Twain.
[00:59:55] He was trying to finance it into like his greatest project.
[00:59:58] He thought that he thought he could tell the story of America through Mark Twain.
[01:00:02] You know what, I'm just going to read it myself on Wikipedia.
[01:00:05] And then he was in Nashville one day doing the show and he lost his voice.
[01:00:08] He's can't hate cancer.
[01:00:10] He never came back.
[01:00:11] Did he have cancer?
[01:00:12] He found out he had cancer.
[01:00:14] God damn, what the fuck?
[01:00:15] And he'll never, he'll never act again.
[01:00:17] What?
[01:00:18] He might act again, but he's got to be in the role of a guy that talks like that.
[01:00:22] Or a guy that doesn't talk at all.
[01:00:24] True.
[01:00:25] He's a good little factor that he could pull.
[01:00:27] He's a really good actor.
[01:00:28] I've always thought that he deserved that one iconic role that he never got.
[01:00:34] You don't think he's got plenty of iconic roles.
[01:00:36] Yeah, he never got that one starring.
[01:00:41] I guess he was talented enough to.
[01:00:43] I mean, between heat and fucking.
[01:00:45] He's the third building heat.
[01:00:47] Yeah, sure.
[01:00:48] He's the second building top gun.
[01:00:49] Turn the on the set of top gun.
[01:00:51] On the set of top gun.
[01:00:52] Because Adam, he was so method.
[01:00:55] What do you think?
[01:00:55] He was bullying Tom Cruise.
[01:00:57] What do you want to be a movie called?
[01:00:58] Because he wanted, it's called me.
[01:01:00] It's called me.
[01:01:01] You're like, I'm always 30 minutes away from sucking a guy's dick.
[01:01:07] Anywhere I go, no matter where I am.
[01:01:10] I'm 30 minutes away.
[01:01:11] 30 minutes.
[01:01:11] I could be sucking a guy's dick.
[01:01:13] I start getting horny when I feel the meat around the corner.
[01:01:14] When you feel the meat.
[01:01:16] When you feel the meat.
[01:01:17] My eyes starts puckering up when I feel the meat around the corner.
[01:01:20] If I'm on you and it's between you and some other guy.
[01:01:25] I'm going to force you to suck dick and gun.
[01:01:28] You don't even have to do that.
[01:01:29] I would do it without the gun.
[01:01:30] I would do it for free.
[01:01:32] You wouldn't even even even gun.
[01:01:36] Oh, really?
[01:01:38] Now that we're out on it.
[01:01:38] How about I saw you suck by cock right now?
[01:01:41] Now that we're sitting here two guys are dinner together.
[01:01:43] I think you're cute.
[01:01:44] Maybe we could have sex.
[01:01:46] Sounds beautiful to me.
[01:01:48] That was the deleted scene.
[01:01:49] Yeah.
[01:01:49] No, that's the scene from meat.
[01:01:51] No, that's from which the movie you drew originally.
[01:01:54] Yeah.
[01:01:54] Listen, what if we did a secret interview?
[01:01:57] What if we did a secret interview?
[01:01:58] How we all dream about it when we called meat?
[01:02:02] And you want to be in it, but it's also your real life.
[01:02:04] You know, I'm only dreaming about pussy.
[01:02:06] And that and the ahh.
[01:02:08] You know, I'm only dreaming about it.
[01:02:10] So P.M. SS.
[01:02:12] Why?
[01:02:12] He would bully Tom Cruise because he was mad.
[01:02:13] Tom Cruise was the first on the call sheet.
[01:02:15] Is that what your story was?
[01:02:17] No.
[01:02:18] Yes, it was motherfucker.
[01:02:20] What do you mean no?
[01:02:22] Wait, what is this?
[01:02:24] In 2021, after-
[01:02:26] No, he would bully him because he wanted it to like,
[01:02:28] he wanted Tom Cruise to hate him in the performance.
[01:02:31] So he would like hit, he would bully him on set to like piss Tom Cruise off
[01:02:37] so that their on screen chemistry would be like more real.
[01:02:40] That's in Top Gun?
[01:02:41] In Top Gun, yeah.
[01:02:43] And then he made up this whole story about the ice man-
[01:02:46] The only bottom gun that you were in.
[01:02:50] He made up this whole story about the ice man
[01:02:52] about a man whose father pushed him to heart.
[01:02:55] Like he made up a whole backstory and then he like just kind of brought it.
[01:02:58] That's just good acting.
[01:03:00] The guy, what you find out from the documentary is that this man, Val Kilmer,
[01:03:04] truly cared about the work and he was labeled difficult to work with
[01:03:11] because he really cared about what he was doing.
[01:03:14] He was also Batman.
[01:03:16] He was Batman and he was very disappointed in Joel Schumacher's-
[01:03:21] Joel Suckhacher.
[01:03:22] Joel Suckhacher.
[01:03:24] He actually was gay as hell, right Joel?
[01:03:26] Any fuck like a thousand guys?
[01:03:27] Yeah, he was legendarily fucked the most guys of all time.
[01:03:32] I'm not even joking.
[01:03:32] I think I came out like 20,000-
[01:03:34] Yeah, something like that.
[01:03:35] He said he had sex with Joel Schumacher.
[01:03:39] He said he had sex like 20,000 times.
[01:03:41] 20,000 guys.
[01:03:42] He really makes shitty movies, huh?
[01:03:43] Bad director.
[01:03:45] What else?
[01:03:45] What else?
[01:03:46] What a hell of a lover.
[01:03:47] St. Elmo's penis, which Adam is also-
[01:03:51] Son of a man.
[01:03:51] It's me, St. Elmo.
[01:03:53] Shut up, Marion, that movie.
[01:03:55] I have a guy's-
[01:03:56] I'm Elmo, but I have a cop that looks like a man.
[01:04:00] Gordon, Adam showed up earlier and he kept digging through my fur,
[01:04:04] looking for something.
[01:04:08] He pulled my leg apart and he was going through my fur,
[01:04:11] looking for something.
[01:04:12] That didn't happen.
[01:04:14] Well, it sounds like you were molested, Elmo.
[01:04:16] I was my wild wested.
[01:04:19] You were molested, Elmo.
[01:04:21] Elmo was bad into a saint.
[01:04:23] Everybody gets molested, Elmo, you know that.
[01:04:26] I don't even remember what Gordon said.
[01:04:28] I'm thinking about Scatman Crothers from fucking The Shining.
[01:04:32] That's Gordon, Mom.
[01:04:33] Gordon was the black police officer or mailman or something?
[01:04:36] Ball black guy on Sesame Street.
[01:04:41] That was it.
[01:04:41] There's a black mailman in Mr. Rogers, I'm thinking of.
[01:04:46] It's a beautiful day to get here at Dick Suck.
[01:04:48] The beautiful day to get here at Dick Suck.
[01:04:50] It's a beautiful day to Suckman.
[01:04:52] That's a beautiful day to Suckman.
[01:04:54] So, we'll just suck, man.
[01:04:56] And, well, what you say is that, perhaps...
[01:04:58] I'm like, perhaps...
[01:04:59] I'm like, perhaps...
[01:05:00] ...the link, folks.
[01:05:00] It's Mr. Rogers after dark with your host.
[01:05:09] Fuck, fuckly pussy.
[01:05:10] Fuckly pussy.
[01:05:14] I tell you, I bought this for a bit.
[01:05:16] Instead of a trolley, it's...
[01:05:20] Yeah, fuck it, it's just a trolley, of course.
[01:05:22] Yes.
[01:05:25] Well, don't you suck my penis.
[01:05:27] Won't you suck my penis?
[01:05:29] How about this?
[01:05:29] If you ever bought a fun, ugly Christmas sweater
[01:05:32] over the last decade, you thought that would be like a fun thing to do?
[01:05:36] You can go ahead and kill yourself.
[01:05:37] Whoa.
[01:05:38] Whoa.
[01:05:39] Okay.
[01:05:39] Do I...
[01:05:40] Okay.
[01:05:40] Okay.
[01:05:41] Kill yourself to that fun spring.
[01:05:44] Whoa.
[01:05:45] If you...
[01:05:47] If you're a white woman,
[01:05:49] then...
[01:05:51] ...over 265 pounds!
[01:05:53] He JC!
[01:05:54] Go ahead, go ahead.
[01:05:56] Sheldon.
[01:05:58] Aren't you okay?
[01:05:59] I like it!
[01:06:00] So...
[01:06:02] That's a really good...
[01:06:05] I'm just saying...
[01:06:06] ...you're white woman!
[01:06:07] You should kill yourself, basically.
[01:06:08] That's Jeff Fox, where it's Pastor Charlie.
[01:06:10] Kill yourself, Jeff Fox, where they live.
[01:06:12] One night old poised presses his...?
[01:06:15] Oh, baby!
[01:06:17] How long is it?
[01:06:18] What the fuck is the MTV Movie Awards?
[01:06:21] The audacity of MTV.
[01:06:23] They're still doing that?
[01:06:24] Yeah, to be like, oh, we also have an award show.
[01:06:27] Well, they have it for the video music award.
[01:06:29] Also disrespectful is the Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards.
[01:06:33] I'm intensely offended by those kids.
[01:06:36] Fuck, fuck, fuck.
[01:06:37] Those kids think.
[01:06:38] And they picked the worst shit too.
[01:06:40] They're like the best movie in fucking 1992
[01:06:44] is Short Circuit 2.
[01:06:46] Yeah.
[01:06:47] Shut the fuck up.
[01:06:47] Shut up.
[01:06:48] You dumb ass.
[01:06:49] Well, fuck you.
[01:06:50] Fuck you.
[01:06:51] Let's pick this one.
[01:06:53] It picks from the children's.
[01:06:54] Mm-hmm.
[01:06:57] Won't you suck my penis?
[01:07:02] Oh, here we go.
[01:07:03] The 34th annual Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards 2021
[01:07:07] is on March 13.
[01:07:09] I don't like six people with that birthday.
[01:07:11] Really?
[01:07:12] All women with eating disorders.
[01:07:16] And some of them are just fat.
[01:07:17] I don't know if they have eating disorders.
[01:07:18] They're just a little chunky.
[01:07:20] Little chunky?
[01:07:21] Little chunky.
[01:07:22] Little chunky.
[01:07:23] You know.
[01:07:24] Have you seen that movie The Chunky Express?
[01:07:26] You can do it.
[01:07:27] It's about a bunch of big bitches on a train.
[01:07:31] Is it?
[01:07:32] Yeah.
[01:07:33] Dude, throw a little chit-choo.
[01:07:35] I'm trying to get in there.
[01:07:37] I'm trying to get in there.
[01:07:39] Just punch my way through some fat pussy.
[01:07:40] A bunch of big, fun type of bitches on a train.
[01:07:43] That sounds awesome.
[01:07:44] That's pretty cool.
[01:07:44] That sounds really cool.
[01:07:46] Pretty cool, man.
[01:07:47] Some heavy titties in my mouth.
[01:07:48] Here we go.
[01:07:49] The chunky express.
[01:07:50] These are the nominations for Best Movie at The Kids Choice Awards.
[01:07:53] Yeah.
[01:07:53] We're going to get these assholes.
[01:07:55] Do little.
[01:07:56] Hamilton.
[01:07:57] Hubie, Halloween, Mulan, and Sonic the Hedgehog.
[01:08:01] Wait for this year?
[01:08:03] For this year.
[01:08:03] I'm going to go out on the limb.
[01:08:04] And the winner was pretty good.
[01:08:07] The winner was Wonder Woman 1984.
[01:08:09] What?
[01:08:10] Yeah.
[01:08:10] Now that's a bad choice.
[01:08:12] Kids don't like that.
[01:08:13] Yeah.
[01:08:14] Best actress was Billy Bobby Brown.
[01:08:17] That makes sense.
[01:08:18] Wow.
[01:08:18] She's a kid.
[01:08:20] To me, that's an adult.
[01:08:20] And half the way.
[01:08:23] To me, Andrick, that is an adult.
[01:08:25] Vanessa Hudgens, Scarlett Johansson
[01:08:28] as Mulan, or Melissa McCarthy in Super Intelligence.
[01:08:31] What the fuck is Super Intelligence?
[01:08:33] It's a movie for kids.
[01:08:34] Anna Kendrick.
[01:08:35] I get a voice from an animated movie.
[01:08:37] That's a separate category.
[01:08:39] Is he going to get top from Anna Kendrick?
[01:08:41] Who?
[01:08:42] Me.
[01:08:43] Are you?
[01:08:43] Could I?
[01:08:44] If you learn the cup stacking thing from that movie.
[01:08:48] Here we go.
[01:08:48] Look, this is the music.
[01:08:49] This is, keep in mind, this is 2021.
[01:08:51] The best male artist, the nominees are Justin Bieber.
[01:08:56] Drake, Post Malone, Sean Mendez, Harry Styles
[01:09:00] in the weekend.
[01:09:01] OK.
[01:09:02] Justin Bieber.
[01:09:03] Justin Bieber won.
[01:09:04] Yep.
[01:09:05] How?
[01:09:05] And he deserves it.
[01:09:06] Has he made, has he released music?
[01:09:08] Yeah, he's got new music, dude.
[01:09:09] And it's pretty good.
[01:09:10] Well, I haven't heard any of it.
[01:09:11] I've been sucked with Dick and Californian.
[01:09:13] Tasted great.
[01:09:14] That's him.
[01:09:15] That's him.
[01:09:16] That's him.
[01:09:16] And he has another one that music video where
[01:09:20] Diane Keaton plays his grandmother and my girlfriend
[01:09:23] made me wash up with her yesterday.
[01:09:26] And I definitely did not want to.
[01:09:29] Did it make you horny?
[01:09:31] It's actually like shot terribly.
[01:09:33] It's like I wouldn't take issue with the cinematographer
[01:09:38] you found that Justin Bieber raised God.
[01:09:41] No, it's very funny.
[01:09:43] It's very it's very funny.
[01:09:45] Let me see.
[01:09:46] No, you got to put you got to put her on the chunky express.
[01:09:48] You know, straight up fat line of Del Rey.
[01:09:51] I don't know.
[01:09:51] I haven't seen the pictures, but I'm interested.
[01:09:54] Get you on the show.
[01:09:55] I'm on his way.
[01:09:56] You know, it's like really truly put her in a corset.
[01:09:59] It's an improvement.
[01:10:00] But she's got too much of that like mini fridge mid section.
[01:10:04] I love I don't got no problem with that.
[01:10:06] A wide a wide back, a wide parallel.
[01:10:10] Big old some titties bouncing up and down.
[01:10:12] Now, let's see.
[01:10:13] That's some nice thighs.
[01:10:14] That's not what's happening.
[01:10:17] You're missing your misreading.
[01:10:18] Let me see.
[01:10:19] I don't have a problem with this with a fucking belly.
[01:10:21] No, it's not the belly.
[01:10:22] It's the width of the waist.
[01:10:24] So she looks square.
[01:10:26] Again, I'm really not seeing an issue.
[01:10:29] Especially if she's fucking hot.
[01:10:31] She's got a pretty face.
[01:10:33] Your boy is busting.
[01:10:35] Ooh, look at these thighs, bro.
[01:10:37] I'm in.
[01:10:38] She's a thickam.
[01:10:39] She's there's a couple of drumettes, bro.
[01:10:42] She's a nice thickam.
[01:10:44] Look, at the end of the day, she's still Lana Del Rey.
[01:10:46] She's hot.
[01:10:47] I don't know who Lana Del Rey is.
[01:10:49] I just Googled fat women and it came out.
[01:10:51] I like it.
[01:10:51] Listen, I like it.
[01:10:52] I like Lana Del Rey.
[01:10:53] I don't even.
[01:10:53] I never heard.
[01:10:54] Oh, yeah.
[01:10:54] Look at this.
[01:10:55] Oh, yeah.
[01:10:55] I just want women to know that I like Lana Del Rey.
[01:10:58] Well, we all know.
[01:10:59] We all know.
[01:11:00] I like it.
[01:11:02] Dude, she looks like a fucking.
[01:11:03] We all know the play of the I would fuck this woman
[01:11:07] to fuck other women move.
[01:11:10] She looks like a white trash Italian girl from like fucking
[01:11:13] Essex right now, which is pretty Italian.
[01:11:17] That's not her name, right?
[01:11:18] No, it's a stage name.
[01:11:20] I think her name is Lizzy.
[01:11:21] Her real name is David Blaine.
[01:11:24] Whoa, for real.
[01:11:25] Yeah, what if that's what we find out
[01:11:27] is that Lana Del Rey has been David Blaine this time.
[01:11:30] Yeah, it's been a magic trick.
[01:11:31] I really can't.
[01:11:32] I'm not seeing that many pictures of her fat.
[01:11:34] I mean, there's this one.
[01:11:36] Oh, interesting.
[01:11:37] Let me see that.
[01:11:38] You know, everyone's got their off day, but that's I mean,
[01:11:41] that's just I told you guys the average wait for a woman
[01:11:45] in America is 177 pounds.
[01:11:47] It's 235 pounds.
[01:11:52] I suck the dick in California.
[01:11:54] Turn me gay.
[01:11:55] They might have to shit again.
[01:11:56] I've been shitting quite a bit.
[01:11:57] That's good.
[01:11:57] Dude, that's helpful.
[01:11:59] My body's getting all the toxins out.
[01:12:01] All right.
[01:12:01] Well, I'm going to go for this episode.
[01:12:03] You guys can keep feel free to keep going.
[01:12:05] But I have to shut.
[01:12:06] How much money?
[01:12:06] Oh, we're way.
[01:12:07] Oh, we're good.
[01:12:08] OK, bye.