[00:00:00] and give me a fucking little join a really

[00:00:02] yeah we're good

[00:00:04] alright check check watch the pep i got the fucked up crinkly my court but

[00:00:09] i'm gonna do it like a professional in the one and will will do what i have

[00:00:12] broken you drop the volume like a

[00:00:14] a little bit i thought that it doesn't make it louder yeah louder than i said

[00:00:18] and i thought they're hanging out of the ball yeah you guys are getting the

[00:00:22] experience it might have a sound you guys can you sound good

[00:00:25] you sound good

[00:00:26] maybe my key to my cans up alright you sound great

[00:00:29] thanks for showing us that it is

[00:00:31] uh... i don't think it should be the difference at all

[00:00:34] oh well that's too much that's too loud

[00:00:36] yeah but we should be the same here i think i know that i just crank them all

[00:00:40] because i don't know what okay yeah

[00:00:42] i'm feeling good

[00:00:44] okay

[00:00:48] i'm feeling good at my dick is hard

[00:00:51] you want to hit record

[00:00:52] it's already gone

[00:00:53] oh okay

[00:00:55] no listen you've used every part of the buffalo yeah i got you

[00:00:58] yeah

[00:00:59] yeah

[00:01:00] so um... hi yo

[00:01:02] yeah for all of you who have been

[00:01:04] following

[00:01:05] the the plot line of

[00:01:08] us being the cabin

[00:01:10] it's taken a turn for the worst i suppose oh yeah

[00:01:14] yeah

[00:01:14] yeah tell the people what happened elders died trying to get marshmallows

[00:01:19] that's what he says but this disappeared

[00:01:22] he was lord into a gay sex den we've reached the now we need guests to get

[00:01:26] through an hour portion of the show

[00:01:28] yeah

[00:01:29] the crew of the whole week boy we've always been in that position

[00:01:33] yet we got we got damn

[00:01:36] this fucking he had to break the mic or didn't break the mic or just it's alright

[00:01:40] i know what i'm doing i see

[00:01:42] see how i'm handling it

[00:01:43] like a fucking gentleman with a hard-ass dick

[00:01:45] okay

[00:01:46] well folks

[00:01:50] but maybe maybe switch chords without him

[00:01:52] yeah it's only right

[00:01:54] totally right here

[00:01:56] the shitty one i don't give a fuck actually

[00:01:58] we got our boy Ian

[00:01:59] little dick fight answer the mill in the building what's up opposite day it's

[00:02:03] actually not it's the same it's the it's real day

[00:02:06] it's a real day it's real day it's not opposite day yeah and that's what

[00:02:11] was the size your dick but nice try chief

[00:02:15] uh... damn you have a question

[00:02:17] what i see what you guys got going on the other

[00:02:20] in a nice little dent

[00:02:22] uh...

[00:02:22] uh... that's one of that

[00:02:24] in the ends ass

[00:02:25] he's got pajamas on you do look awesome thank you yeah you're wearing like a

[00:02:29] in came to the slumber party with the whole costume switch yeah

[00:02:33] he's here he's here for

[00:02:35] like eighteen hours

[00:02:36] uh-huh he came and i brought pajamas yeah and a robe

[00:02:40] he put pajamas in a robe and i am at

[00:02:42] comfort level infinity and beyond yeah we got elders in the in the kitchen

[00:02:47] but making a shit she'll be looking in the kitchen we've got the albanian in

[00:02:50] the kitchen making a chilli

[00:02:52] we've got we've got our uh...

[00:02:54] me and my dog

[00:02:55] we have your dog

[00:02:57] we've got some

[00:02:58] some fun wheels just watching basketball yeah i'd be willing that's right

[00:03:02] that's right here

[00:03:04] and which is it's a real tell you could tell they it was

[00:03:07] they did rock paper scissors either an intellectual debate or battleship for

[00:03:11] who get out of place any blows up to liberty and then says you're not a

[00:03:14] play the rest of you

[00:03:20] would you do that

[00:03:21] that's how you know that i wouldn't do that actually i would

[00:03:25] i would play and i would close my you know battleship lap top of the thing and

[00:03:30] say that

[00:03:31] i'm not into war your pacifices on pacifices

[00:03:35] yeah that's awesome

[00:03:36] yeah well you know what i'd say

[00:03:38] what here we go

[00:03:42] alone around about a news to speak mind

[00:03:44] week

[00:04:09] All the way up on it try it again, okay one more time Adam volumes all the way up. It is okay

[00:04:15] Wait apropos nothing you're what I'm a pacifist

[00:04:26] Did you pull up seven eight times the charm

[00:04:30] You too

[00:04:38] Also, we get bored later. I brought Marlboro playing cards nice dude nice

[00:04:42] I brought this book that maybe we could have some fun with it's called

[00:04:46] Italian without words. Oh my god

[00:04:50] You treat this like it's a tonight show

[00:04:53] This is a boa constrictor

[00:05:01] Fudges led a fart at us

[00:05:05] That's awesome you're not and you want to smell you like shit yourself earlier and I couldn't smell it

[00:05:09] I didn't shit myself. Well, he made it seem as such

[00:05:13] I was worried I had covid because I couldn't smell no no no just melt that but I could smell the pork

[00:05:17] Why did I make it seem as such? I don't know you said it was terrible. Oh, I thought you said he said made up a rumor that soft shit

[00:05:24] I've been like them rip and I've been afraid I will have been found out so I've been getting up and leaving too far

[00:05:29] Did the president shit himself meeting with the poker now a couple months ago?

[00:05:34] Yes back in late October in early November

[00:05:38] Your job is to control the media campaign to prevent people from

[00:05:43] No, yeah, I want it Secret Service is a change Biden's diaper

[00:05:49] Honestly if they they have a heart attack gun. That's proven. Yeah. Yeah, the heart attack guns real

[00:05:55] So they have to have a shit yourself gun. They absolutely have a shit. Well, that's what that brown note was right

[00:06:00] They have a brown noise makes you shit yourself, which is awesome brown sound imagine every morning you get in the foot

[00:06:06] You get in a squat honestly this you play that you should yourself

[00:06:10] Accuated the shit yourself gun should be like a children's toy. Yeah, that would be better than laser for constipated kids. Yeah, nerf

[00:06:18] Yeah

[00:06:19] Why do you both look at me? I need you to pick up the slack. I gotta fucked up Mike. Okay. Okay, so you know turf's yeah

[00:06:25] Yeah, what does nerf stand for? No

[00:06:28] It doesn't stand for that women should be able to do whatever they want except talking movies

[00:06:40] And that's a nerve. Yep. Yeah, that's good, man. So

[00:06:45] Ian, why's your finger with your finger hovering over there? You got something else?

[00:06:49] We got another deuce big a little clip. No, I was just I I

[00:06:53] To next point about people talking to ice went saw the movie titanium in theaters and

[00:06:59] It was in a part of town where you know it was like mystery science theater

[00:07:03] 3000 for people who can't read and

[00:07:06] What what do you mean the can't read part this person yelled something out and then this but it's a French movie with subtitles

[00:07:13] They can clearly read no not these you saw you saw a French movie in a black theaters. Yes. Yes

[00:07:20] The magic Johnson theater so in your attempt to not be racist and say black people you claim that all black people can't read

[00:07:26] Those are your words chief. That's what you said say that you said mystery science theater for people who can't read

[00:07:31] He wasn't talking about black people who's talking about babies

[00:07:35] He went to an infant's theater and this this woman got up in the front row and some guy was like

[00:07:41] What he called their bitch there you go

[00:07:52] Hell yeah, dude, that's awesome man

[00:07:54] That's what he said yeah, I could believe it. I also could believe I recorded it. That's crazy

[00:08:00] That's such a good stroke of good luck for our show. I know and I have something actually you can stroke as well

[00:08:06] I'll tell you after the show. I will I will absolutely show you

[00:08:13] Show me on the stop where you want me to touch you

[00:08:17] You should make dolls to sell yeah myself. Yeah, you should have dolls

[00:08:22] Okay, and you pull the cord and it says a stop phrase. That's squeezing. Yeah, that's good. It laughs

[00:08:27] Yeah, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's not actually really good

[00:08:34] I'm strong how much that the overhead cost might be hard on a doll. Yeah, it's not like a t-shirt

[00:08:39] It's not a t-shirt. It's not a calendar. Well, we got we got to take over a trip over to Beijing me with the manufacturers

[00:08:46] And so I'm about to take a shot of pep toe. What's it called Beijing?

[00:08:52] Because like yellow

[00:08:54] Bage, oh, it's Beijing. Yeah, why don't you take that for a walk a little bit? What happens there?

[00:09:05] What happens in Beijing and it or is it there's slaves of love

[00:09:11] So I do have gas X if you need it. I don't want gas X. I want pep toe. That's not pep toe

[00:09:16] That's top care eldest bought the fucking generic shit. Yeah, dude. He's on a budget

[00:09:21] Look at him, dude

[00:09:25] They were out of pep though you say all right

[00:09:27] Elders and I the best drive up to what happened on multiple pissings on the side of the road. It's a two and a half hour drive

[00:09:34] Yeah, that seems completely unnecessary. Well, I have the world's honey bladder over there. That was you elders

[00:09:39] Yep, yeah

[00:09:42] Check out his prostate he said no

[00:09:44] So Ian and I you know all boy, you know in the house

[00:09:50] There's a lot of tests offs from you know, especially with me and Nick and stop

[00:09:54] We're always we're always me and Nick. There's a lot of tests. We're always firing shots at each other and it's equal

[00:10:01] And you know, it's not it's not you know, whatever of course start dynamic will be boy's will be boys

[00:10:08] But when Ian got here, I was like oh another soft boy is here. So I said you want to talk

[00:10:12] He's our soft to just gay you got the wrong

[00:10:22] I looked at Adam and I was like

[00:10:28] Anyway, I'm trying to tell a story

[00:10:31] I'm trying to you don't even have a sound bite you have a YouTube video. You keep buffering back over the part

[00:10:36] He's now that's that's the bit. Yeah, he's

[00:10:42] He's scrubbing over a cam rip of deuce bigalow

[00:10:47] That's all right. Anyway, okay, so what you guys up to I meant like I was like Ian you want to come walk the dog with me

[00:10:52] Mm-hmm. So we were having as we tend to the you know, the gayest conversation

[00:10:59] We were talking about how nice it was to be in nature to be out of the city. It is nice

[00:11:04] What were we saying in we were saying like we do we it was just such a moment of like dude

[00:11:09] Look at all this beauty everything is I mean like look at these rolling hills and it's so nice just to hear these sounds

[00:11:15] You're not okay. It's so nice to be out here and then what happens nature

[00:11:20] And I think Ian was saying like if you look at the these houses and you look at the way like people live out here

[00:11:26] There are so many people in this country that live exactly like that. Maybe we're more similar than we really wow

[00:11:32] That's such an interesting which I thought was a really interesting Thomas to it. Yeah

[00:11:37] He's wearing a smoking jacket and I was throwing my robe belt around

[00:11:43] So anyway all of a sudden my dog just like like convulses and then just dives her head into

[00:11:50] like a pile of leaves and then she

[00:11:54] Pulls out this she has this thing in her mouth. There's like long black black

[00:11:59] Like thing I was like why are you eating that I was like trying to get it out of her mouth

[00:12:04] And he got all this black shit

[00:12:05] I got all this black shit all over my hand and then like

[00:12:09] basically

[00:12:11] The carcass falls out what?

[00:12:14] Yeah

[00:12:16] Snake all right. Yeah, I know as we were in the middle of having that conversation

[00:12:21] Yeah, it's just like what happens on curbing

[00:12:31] I feel like that actually

[00:12:39] But it's not the right thing like it's it's stop pretending you're some Andy Kaufman level genius

[00:12:46] I am you're not so mad so like trying his best with some sound cues

[00:13:01] Well, that's awesome man

[00:13:06] Yeah, so I pulled I and like like it was like a sleeve was coming off of it and it was

[00:13:12] It was the it was the skin of the snake she had to sell the carcass in her mouth

[00:13:20] Yeah, and then I had to wrestle the carcass out of her mouth. Wow. Yeah, did you get it? I?

[00:13:25] Think I got most of it. She ate some of it. She did but yeah, he doesn't have to pay for dog food

[00:13:34] It's a happy story. Mm-hmm. That's awesome, man. Yeah, it's a pretty good. I was hoping honestly

[00:13:39] You kind of built it up a little too much. Yeah, you just what just you wait till we get me and Ian can tell the story on

[00:13:47] Honestly, I should have just walked in and told you guys what happened. Yeah, I thought you guys are

[00:13:51] But it is true at least you fucking hold your

[00:13:54] Hold it near the yeah, hold it near your mouth, dude

[00:13:57] You're so you're so amped to do these sound cues. You're not even talking on Mike. Good. Sorry

[00:14:04] Okay, hold on, but yeah, I mean

[00:14:08] You are right

[00:14:10] He said I'm good to save on dog food. Oh my god playing

[00:14:23] That's that's where you would do the curvy

[00:14:31] And what point are you kind of getting across with that musical cue what?

[00:14:35] It was just my YouTube playlist

[00:14:42] So tell us more about the pajamas worthy

[00:14:49] What you missed was

[00:14:52] We were outside admiring nature looking at the stars

[00:14:55] Trying to figure out where the north star was what planet that is and young Adam

[00:15:01] Mm-hmm was like hey guys, what are those streaks in the sky and as we're trying to figure that out

[00:15:06] We all this is also boring a shooting star

[00:15:12] It was beautiful I saw some cows earlier today

[00:15:18] I'm sad. I missed the shooting stars. I was shooting my nuts off. No you were sitting in that chair on your cell phone

[00:15:23] You just saw your big

[00:15:25] Girls and calling elders. It's like the inverse of being like I went to New York and I saw Elmo and Spider-Man

[00:15:32] Yeah, there's a coyote and a shooting star

[00:15:35] Yeah, what'd you wish for when you saw the shooting star?

[00:15:38] We can only be friends forever

[00:15:45] Yeah

[00:15:46] You just said it out loud. Yeah, you thought you're right good thing. I knew it and I didn't say the real wish

[00:15:52] You'll never get out of me. That's awesome

[00:15:54] You told me the real wish Adam stopped. You don't have any secrets in Adam

[00:16:00] Ian yeah, he does every secrets. Do you think you have any secrets left? You're only as sick as your secrets. Oh is it a a thing?

[00:16:07] So I don't keep the secrets. That's awesome. I mean why one of the a rules. Yes. How does that keep you sober?

[00:16:13] Like if I drank and didn't tell anyone. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, or you're like, you know, so you have to say everything

[00:16:22] Second guys off

[00:16:24] Without telling your wife certainly have secrets it's called boundaries. You do you have secrets? Mm-hmm

[00:16:30] Foundry's is the bar he hangs out

[00:16:44] This is a good ass episode

[00:16:46] That's always a good time when he is here. That's always a good time

[00:16:49] I believe our one of our most popular guests. Mm-hmm. It's very very fun to be here and I appreciate everyone being

[00:16:58] Nice and kind and saying hello and coming to shows. It's very nice. That's cute, man. Yeah

[00:17:04] That's a good experience. That's a good experience and I get I get feedback that my um

[00:17:10] Homosexuality has helped other that's huge. Oh man. That's awesome. I'm like a it gets better moments. Mm-hmm. Wow

[00:17:18] Someone looking at your life and being like maybe one day. That's how I can be

[00:17:30] I mean to say

[00:17:38] I'm just saying that sounds awesome. Yeah, it sounds cool fat peep fat motherfucker say that to me too. Do they? Yeah

[00:17:44] Well, they say one day I'll get pussy like you they're just like dude. Thank you. I which I actually think is hilarious

[00:17:49] I never I'd never meant that but I like it as a

[00:17:52] As a side as a positive side effect Ian is doing a lot to make people feel better about themselves. Yeah, you're in work

[00:17:59] The work you're doing talk about sucking cock in eighth grade. Mm-hmm. It's more important than what I'm doing

[00:18:07] Who's who is fifth grade?

[00:18:09] No, he was dry hunting. He said it was dry and hungry

[00:18:15] Figuring out just doing a couple rough drafts, but he showed us the guy and he's pretty good. He's lying

[00:18:20] And he shows his cock too. Yeah, you have

[00:18:27] It's his no they kept his head later

[00:18:35] They call each other by their name

[00:18:37] That is true

[00:18:40] Oh, man, so you had you do you want to tell your book fair story?

[00:18:44] I mean, I know I'm not unique in it. Oh, I know other people have having gay sex at the book fair

[00:18:50] Ask most people don't even buy books at the book fair. Dude. Yeah, we just use it as a cover

[00:18:56] Book fair the book fair pissed me off

[00:18:58] It was a fucking picture from a movie and then you would open the book and it would just still be a gay ass book

[00:19:03] Wait, you thought inside of the book? I don't know what I was expecting

[00:19:11] I don't know what I was expecting dude, but I was pissed off

[00:19:15] They should have like more pictures or something

[00:19:18] There wasn't even like a picture there would be like maybe three pictures in the middle from the movie

[00:19:22] It should have more pictures through it even if it's still the fucking book. Yeah, that's all I'm saying

[00:19:27] I don't think that's a ridiculous point of view in fact

[00:19:30] No, I just I now I understand I don't think you were like wanting like a

[00:19:35] Pop-up movie. Yeah, that would have been sick too if it was one of those flip books

[00:19:41] There was the whole movie

[00:19:43] That'd be fucking awesome. It's book. It would be a thick ass book

[00:19:47] Like like that wasn't disappointing what like I'm the asshole for thinking that no thank you

[00:19:55] No, you did you ball out on book day?

[00:19:57] No, not really when they when they set the library

[00:20:01] Yeah

[00:20:02] But that was always a hustle where you'd have to send your mom to work to sell your ship

[00:20:07] Yeah, but then you'd get all your family members

[00:20:09] Their Christmas gifts for the year you'd get like your grandfather like world's best grandfather pencil and you're like my job is done here

[00:20:15] Yeah, I don't think I got my think my grandparents were in Greece or did

[00:20:22] So they didn't get shit. Yeah, my grandparents

[00:20:24] I remember I got my dad tools from like the from the book fair

[00:20:28] No, they would do like a secret Santa workshop at John Rura where I was like little kids would spend

[00:20:34] It was just like a place for you to buy gifts for your family

[00:20:38] And I see you over there getting a fucking clip together. You don't know what I'm doing. Just tell you a little story

[00:20:43] Come on

[00:20:44] You're about your barter system for tools

[00:20:47] Yeah, I was just like your barter system and also

[00:20:50] Cushy dreams. Oh shit. Should we chief some cushy dreams right now?

[00:20:55] Copy in your mind. Yeah, dude. You you've been training for this way. You've been training for okay. Okay. This is what you've been training for

[00:21:04] It's been months

[00:21:06] Just past me think it's under battleship

[00:21:10] Anyways, it's a website you can go to you're all on Nick. You should do this over like music

[00:21:14] Okay, that'll like set the mood for like

[00:21:19] No, because then maybe they didn't license the music for their ad. Mm-hmm. Oh, we don't want to get them sued. Yeah

[00:21:30] Chill

[00:21:34] All right

[00:21:36] Okay, I'm going to the mic and he's really yes, I got copy right here

[00:21:42] Right here. He goes my friend, but he is a queer. Yep. I'm sitting here with Nick at the table

[00:21:49] That's right. He's been really unstable

[00:21:54] Oh, this is the kitchen. He's frown turn your crap

[00:21:59] Sometimes he can't rap well

[00:22:01] Okay, good. That's all she dreams. I mean

[00:22:06] That's better than anything I've ever done on this

[00:22:10] Nice round of applause for eating. Did you write that or that's you? That's that's off the dome

[00:22:14] I mean look man. It's off the dome. That's straight off the dome off the dome

[00:22:23] I'll tell you that story about doing

[00:22:25] Some show at the crown

[00:22:27] You know, I would turn into a karaoke bar afterwards. Yep. Yep, and that black guy and those two fat black ladies that came in after the show

[00:22:33] To do karaoke and the black dude did it was like money for nothing

[00:22:37] Did a freestyle rap about drunk driving

[00:22:41] Yeah, it's like who taught the kids to drink and drop, you know, I don't want I was drunk out of my mind

[00:22:46] I'm like this is amazing. Yeah

[00:22:49] And then like 30 minutes late. No one's doing karaoke. He just goes back up again does the same thing

[00:22:55] That was over. Over money saying he had written this drunk driving song

[00:23:00] Do you remember Eddie of the lyrics? No. Oh, dude. That's sick. I don't think I remember that about that guy. He was the same guy that came up outside

[00:23:09] You know, there's people sitting outside. He's like, how you doing? I'm on em perks and on em deans

[00:23:13] I will not ask for money, but I will take a cigarette

[00:23:17] Just letting you know it could have been worse

[00:23:22] All right, turn that off

[00:23:24] Cushy dreams offers a full lineup of premium smokable CBD. They specialize in extraordinary CBD rich hem flower

[00:23:32] AKA bud and pre-roll CBD joins so join the group of adults who are sick of vapes and gummies

[00:23:38] I'm so tired of that shit me too. I hate vapes. I hate gummies. Same. I love smoking my fucking CBD

[00:23:44] Yes, the the group of adults who are tired of vapes and gummies and want to smoke their CBD smoke it

[00:23:51] So it looks like high quality marijuana. It feels like high quality marijuana and it tastes like high quality pussy

[00:23:59] Oh

[00:24:00] What?

[00:24:01] Yes, did they making you addition they changed it now is cushy dreams sober. Yeah, it seems like a snort could see dreams and be so

[00:24:09] You would you would follow. Yeah, yeah, you've got you relapsed on handstands. Yeah, you would oh, you're right

[00:24:15] No, you can't do. No, I didn't relapse on hand sanitizer dickhead hand sanitizer was the last thing I drank you can't even rush the teeth

[00:24:24] Going on a bed. Yeah, yeah, I have a rush my teeth at six years. You can't one day at a time. You can't do scope. Uh-uh

[00:24:31] I used to do that. That was that was wash. Oh, yeah, Stephen King

[00:24:36] Good company. I don't know that part of mention that but I don't understand why he would he's a millionaire

[00:24:41] Yeah, he was doing roba tuss and also because it's mental gymnastics you convince yourself while I'm not really drinking

[00:24:47] You know, I would put it in my mouth and walk in my room ago

[00:24:49] I can't spit this out. I'm in my room and I drink it and just do that like 12 times. I never stopped you with cum

[00:24:55] Yeah, because it's not a sin to drink. Oh, it's encouraged by our heavenly father

[00:25:01] Um, so I get a lot of

[00:25:03] Oh, yeah, cushy dreams. Yeah, the CBD content is up to 20

[00:25:07] Which is some of the highest on the game the attention to detail is noticeable in every beautiful flower

[00:25:13] Smoking CBD is the most efficient and quickest way to deliver CBD to your system. Well, actually that's not true

[00:25:20] You can boof it up your ass. You can boof it. Actually, that's what we've been doing. We've been boofing it up our ass

[00:25:24] Yeah, we've been doing grab bongs in our asses

[00:25:30] We've been boofing it. Yeah, we've been a roar up our ass the

[00:25:33] Roar roar dude. Oh my god. Yeah, you know, you know why you guys are doing that because

[00:25:40] Girls just want to have fun. Okay. All right. You can't play a song and then say the fucking title

[00:25:53] How are you explaining your fucking sound use?

[00:25:55] I

[00:26:02] Do a freestyle rap to this

[00:26:08] It's not a sin to drink on

[00:26:10] Yeah, it's not a sin to drink on

[00:26:22] It woke up went to the book fair who do I see but him standing there

[00:26:29] And

[00:26:31] Because drag Thanks

[00:26:54] I did it! Do it for two more years!

[00:26:58] Oh wow. Do you think maybe that's what you get off on? Is it humiliation?

[00:27:03] Oh, interesting.

[00:27:04] No.

[00:27:05] So it never feels freeing. It's just like I'm disgusted with myself.

[00:27:09] Next one, what do you mean?

[00:27:11] No, don't let him, Nick's doing a little check.

[00:27:13] No, I'm just checking in on you.

[00:27:15] And yeah, he's wondering.

[00:27:16] Nick's doing a little reconnaissance.

[00:27:18] A little research for his next loop.

[00:27:20] Next life move.

[00:27:21] I've got opera binoculars.

[00:27:24] Yeah.

[00:27:25] Because multiple times the conversation moved elsewhere and then Nick would go,

[00:27:28] let's go back to the book thing.

[00:27:30] Yeah.

[00:27:31] He loves books.

[00:27:33] Nick's going to start loving books.

[00:27:35] Yeah, he loves reading.

[00:27:37] Nick's in wait.

[00:27:38] He's going to start a radio over to look at his library.

[00:27:41] Yeah, I've been purchasing thousands of books.

[00:27:44] I'm going to go in this classic book, man.

[00:27:48] I'm getting sucked off by the fucking drama teacher in these elementary schools.

[00:27:52] Yeah, Ian, I have all the goosebumps.

[00:27:55] I'm very interested.

[00:27:56] You want to come over and check out my goosebumps?

[00:28:01] Grown in California and Oregon, each plan-

[00:28:03] Stop playing.

[00:28:04] Stop the music.

[00:28:05] Yeah, we got to do advertising.

[00:28:06] Grown in California and Oregon, each plan is hand selected by a team of experienced cannabis flower experts.

[00:28:12] Alternative, sorry, whatever.

[00:28:15] It's an alternative for people looking to cut back on smoking other things.

[00:28:20] It mixes well with other things you like to smoke.

[00:28:23] Each batch is slow-cured for two to four weeks to guarantee maximum freshness

[00:28:27] and preserved flavor in cannabinoids.

[00:28:30] It's organic.

[00:28:31] It's all that shit.

[00:28:32] Anyway, why don't we spark up some fucking cuisine.

[00:28:34] We're living in a single room with three other individuals.

[00:28:36] One of them was a male in the other two, the other two were filming it.

[00:28:39] I love this song.

[00:28:40] Not only knows what they were up to in there.

[00:28:42] And furthermore, Susan, I wouldn't be the least bit surprised to learn that all four of them have virtually smoked marijuana.

[00:28:47] Muralighter.

[00:28:48] Muralighter.

[00:28:49] Muralighter.

[00:28:50] Reversed.

[00:28:54] Thank you, Ian.

[00:28:55] Dude, best band.

[00:28:56] You got to start with the music.

[00:28:57] Yeah.

[00:28:58] Yeah.

[00:28:59] You guys are so awesome.

[00:29:00] Best band.

[00:29:02] Oh, yeah.

[00:29:03] Here's the deal, guys.

[00:29:04] They have two lines of products.

[00:29:06] They have a 3.5 gram, 8K, and 8.

[00:29:11] Nitrogen sealed can of marijuana, CBD buds, that you can mix with anything else you like to smoke.

[00:29:20] You just put his asshole up to them.

[00:29:22] And they have a pre-roll of CBD joints that are gram each.

[00:29:28] Lautomar sick.

[00:29:29] Both of these products come in three different lines in order of quality.

[00:29:32] Three different lines, man.

[00:29:34] Be careful there.

[00:29:36] Private reserve, ultra-premium and premium.

[00:29:39] And of course, there are six different choices of specific strains of full flowers.

[00:29:44] Don't smoke in that loud pack, right?

[00:29:46] The fuck, man.

[00:29:47] That can match any of your different moods, like relax, peace, create, hustle, energy,

[00:29:51] and dream.

[00:29:52] And it's good to smoke on the beach.

[00:29:54] And our boy, our big-dick Bill Menaker, he's actually smoking cushy dreams right now.

[00:29:59] Is that cushy dreams that you're smoking?

[00:30:01] Yeah, you want some?

[00:30:02] No.

[00:30:03] What?

[00:30:04] Why?

[00:30:05] It is, it is.

[00:30:06] No.

[00:30:07] Give it to me, then.

[00:30:08] Anyway, all right, let me finish.

[00:30:09] Hold on.

[00:30:10] We just go ahead.

[00:30:11] I want to get a celebrity endorsement.

[00:30:12] How good is the cushy dreams?

[00:30:14] Pretty fucking good, bro.

[00:30:16] You're right here.

[00:30:18] First, folks.

[00:30:20] From Big-Dick Bill Menaker.

[00:30:22] Nice to see you.

[00:30:23] Big Bill.

[00:30:24] So you go to cushydreams.com.

[00:30:25] Oh, we do.

[00:30:26] What you do?

[00:30:27] Oh, my God.

[00:30:28] Get his ass in.

[00:30:29] No, no, no, no, no, no.

[00:30:31] Don't turn the knee in against me.

[00:30:33] Get his ass in.

[00:30:34] Don't turn the knee in against me.

[00:30:37] It's been 10 episodes with you.

[00:30:40] You've never figured out that you could do that.

[00:30:44] I've been waiting for that.

[00:30:46] Oh, my God.

[00:30:47] The final chest move.

[00:30:48] The final chest move.

[00:30:50] Cushydreams.com spell K-U-S-H-Y dreams.

[00:30:53] And a checkout used promo code comes down for 20% off.

[00:30:57] I'm so hungry.

[00:30:58] Smoke?

[00:30:59] You're CBD because you can.

[00:31:02] Thank you, cushy.

[00:31:03] One hit the loud pack?

[00:31:04] Sure.

[00:31:05] Cushy dreams.

[00:31:06] Yeah, I love cushy dreams.

[00:31:08] You know what else I love is you guys coming to see me do stand up comedy and buying the

[00:31:13] 2022 Stobby Baby calendar, which is on sale now.

[00:31:16] Yeah, I don't exactly know what I'm good.

[00:31:20] Can you?

[00:31:21] And I'd like to thank you all for always being nice and great.

[00:31:26] And I appreciate the love.

[00:31:27] It means a lot.

[00:31:28] You mean us, not the people who listen to the show.

[00:31:31] Oh, yeah, shit.

[00:31:32] And come see me as, I don't know exactly everything yet.

[00:31:34] I don't know the exact dates, but I'm coming to San Diego, Las Vegas, San Francisco, Sacramento,

[00:31:40] Austin, Dallas, fucking everywhere.

[00:31:44] Chicago, I think Missouri.

[00:31:46] So come go to stopy.biz slash tour.

[00:31:48] New dates announced.

[00:31:50] Go check it out.

[00:31:51] Yeah, I'm by the county.

[00:31:53] A COVID vaccine truth or sub stack.

[00:31:56] That's awesome.

[00:31:57] Oh, a hundred dollars a month.

[00:31:59] Oh, yes.

[00:32:00] Not tall like it is.

[00:32:01] Everyone.

[00:32:02] That she gives you AIDS.

[00:32:04] What?

[00:32:05] That's post number one.

[00:32:07] Unlocked for $250.

[00:32:08] Holy shit.

[00:32:09] Dude, I have cash.

[00:32:10] Can I just give it to you now?

[00:32:12] Yeah, Dr. Fauci might have fucked those dogs also.

[00:32:15] He probably did.

[00:32:16] $300 to hear the story.

[00:32:19] And I actually have an exciting announcement.

[00:32:21] I am saying we go somewhere else.

[00:32:23] That's a huge bitch.

[00:32:25] That's nice.

[00:32:26] It doesn't even work.

[00:32:29] You should isolate it to that's a huge bitch.

[00:32:32] The line before it.

[00:32:33] He always smokes the fuck's it?

[00:32:35] The whole timing up.

[00:32:37] It's a YouTube clip.

[00:32:38] And when you come back.

[00:32:39] You do the screen.

[00:32:41] Don't you dare unplug it with your delicate little fingers.

[00:32:45] You do screen recording and get the parts you want.

[00:32:48] Next time you come back.

[00:32:50] For next time you live and learn.

[00:32:51] Yeah.

[00:32:52] True.

[00:32:53] Okay.

[00:32:54] I love you.

[00:32:56] Now that's a sound cue.

[00:32:57] That's a fun change.

[00:32:58] That's a strong fan.

[00:32:59] Nick do the cues.

[00:33:00] No, let's let Ian do it.

[00:33:02] I'm fine.

[00:33:03] We still got probably 40 minutes to squash here.

[00:33:06] Let's let him do whatever the fuck.

[00:33:09] You want to tell us a little bit more about the book.

[00:33:15] Tell us about seeing.

[00:33:18] We don't have to say his name.

[00:33:20] What is Kyle?

[00:33:21] What are they saying?

[00:33:22] You already said Marty.

[00:33:23] That was a made up name.

[00:33:24] Oh, okay.

[00:33:25] Let's go with Marty.

[00:33:26] Also, when is this episode coming out?

[00:33:29] December.

[00:33:30] January 31.

[00:33:32] It's like late December.

[00:33:34] Oh, is it damn?

[00:33:35] All right.

[00:33:36] Well, I'm going to be at the 930 club in Washington, D.C. with the pie tasers.

[00:33:39] Cat, bite and kill, link is.

[00:33:40] It's going to be December 26.

[00:33:42] Oh, nice.

[00:33:43] I'm going to be in a laugh at it up.

[00:33:46] Poughkeepsie.

[00:33:47] I'm going to be in Maine Providence and Vermont with David Tell.

[00:33:52] I love it.

[00:33:53] I have more dates on my own.

[00:33:54] I'm going to be in fightingance.com.

[00:33:56] Subscribe to my Patreon.

[00:33:57] I don't have one, but let me do it.

[00:34:00] Nice bro.

[00:34:01] Can you close the window?

[00:34:02] It's pretty cold.

[00:34:03] I like the stuff.

[00:34:04] You're welcome.

[00:34:05] It's nice.

[00:34:06] Yeah, the fresh air is nice.

[00:34:07] Keeps you sharp.

[00:34:08] I'll just be.

[00:34:09] Keeps you sharp.

[00:34:10] I always uncomfortable also, but now that I know bothers you.

[00:34:12] All right.

[00:34:13] Do it.

[00:34:14] Get him.

[00:34:15] There you go.

[00:34:17] No, you don't even do it right here.

[00:34:19] No, you're just getting bitch.

[00:34:21] Bitch is good.

[00:34:22] That's a huge bitch.

[00:34:23] Adam, you're a huge bitch.

[00:34:30] He was screen recording already.

[00:34:34] Good job, buddy.

[00:34:35] I'm learning.

[00:34:36] Good job.

[00:34:37] That's what I say about Ian.

[00:34:38] Is he continues to learn?

[00:34:40] He works.

[00:34:41] I'm only going to evolve.

[00:34:42] He loves to evolve.

[00:34:43] I love to evolve.

[00:34:44] I love doing the work to evolve and push forward.

[00:34:47] That's so very true.

[00:34:48] But some other people would say that people never really change.

[00:34:51] There's no such thing as evolution.

[00:34:54] Who says that?

[00:34:55] Probably.

[00:34:56] That's a huge bitch.

[00:35:01] Nick J.

[00:35:02] What?

[00:35:03] What was that word?

[00:35:04] Nicki?

[00:35:05] Nicki?

[00:35:06] Oh, did he say that?

[00:35:08] No, but I imagine he was going to do the book for him.

[00:35:11] Damn, he was in the second car for a long time.

[00:35:14] You definitely aren't checking that book out.

[00:35:17] You're going to every section of the book for it.

[00:35:20] You got caught.

[00:35:21] Ian, just tell us about, like, you saw him at the book fair of the positions that you guys

[00:35:25] did.

[00:35:26] Jesus.

[00:35:27] No, come on.

[00:35:28] We have a lot of

[00:35:27] awesome big gay guys.

[00:35:29] We have a lot of...

[00:35:30] You want to help these gay guys or not?

[00:35:32] Help them out.

[00:35:33] These people are on the verge of suicide right now.

[00:35:35] Describe Marty's cocking detail or somebody's going to kill themselves.

[00:35:39] You walked up and he said, you know, I always hated when there's a picture of a movie on

[00:35:43] the cover of him.

[00:35:44] You opened it up and it's a book.

[00:35:46] It's exactly a book.

[00:35:48] And he was like, it's your dad fucking pictures.

[00:35:51] I'm not crazy.

[00:35:52] I'm not crazy.

[00:35:53] He's books have pictures.

[00:35:54] He was like, that is true.

[00:35:55] That's it.

[00:35:56] I never realized that until he unsaid it to me.

[00:35:59] And then he put down the jungle book.

[00:36:02] He's not necessarily reading that.

[00:36:07] He happened to in this case, but it didn't necessarily act.

[00:36:11] He had to have the autobiography.

[00:36:12] He looks over his shoulder and he's like, man, is it just me or does this balloon look

[00:36:16] hot?

[00:36:17] And that coconut bra.

[00:36:18] Yeah.

[00:36:19] Oh, yeah.

[00:36:20] It's almost like guys can be girls sometimes.

[00:36:22] That must be a big moment.

[00:36:24] And if they're technically girls, you can suck their cock.

[00:36:27] And you're not gay.

[00:36:29] In fact, you're super sick.

[00:36:31] And this is Delaware in 1987.

[00:36:33] Right.

[00:36:34] Yes.

[00:36:35] Yes.

[00:36:36] Him was like, you know, because we're in Delaware, we can blow each other.

[00:36:39] We don't have to pay sales time.

[00:36:41] We can start in L.O.

[00:36:43] This is really good.

[00:36:47] Oh, fuck.

[00:36:48] God, I didn't even know that loophole.

[00:36:49] Is it awesome loophole?

[00:36:50] You're blowing my mind, right?

[00:36:52] Oh, yeah, brother.

[00:36:54] Oh, yeah.

[00:36:55] Oh, yeah.

[00:36:56] That would be, um.

[00:36:58] That's what it is.

[00:36:59] You got the cumin going crazy over there.

[00:37:01] Yeah.

[00:37:02] What are you cooking?

[00:37:03] A fucking chicken tikka masala?

[00:37:04] Smelling cumin-y like a bitch.

[00:37:06] Yeah, that's a bit much.

[00:37:07] It smells like new faces in the kitchen.

[00:37:09] Very nice.

[00:37:10] It smells like a paltrowly.

[00:37:13] Smells like a writer's room.

[00:37:15] Smells like a very funny TV show.

[00:37:18] Why are you shaking your dick like that?

[00:37:23] Yeah.

[00:37:24] You have your hand on it.

[00:37:25] You're what you're pitching.

[00:37:26] Specifically your penis.

[00:37:27] You're pitching the head of your dick.

[00:37:28] I can't see it.

[00:37:29] I'm over here.

[00:37:30] He's like waving his dick.

[00:37:31] Oh, shake it my leg.

[00:37:32] Because I'm like, I'm laughing so much.

[00:37:33] I'm sweating.

[00:37:34] So I was like trying to-

[00:37:35] Well, maybe you should be wearing a full pajamas.

[00:37:37] Yeah, you're the asshole on full pajamas.

[00:37:39] You could be wearing a t-shirt and shorts.

[00:37:41] Well, you're right about that.

[00:37:43] But I was very comfortable.

[00:37:46] All right.

[00:37:47] And why is your penis though?

[00:37:48] Mm-hmm.

[00:37:49] That still doesn't explain why you're-

[00:37:50] No, no, because I was airing my crotch out.

[00:37:52] You know?

[00:37:53] Okay.

[00:37:54] Cause I don't around my boys.

[00:37:55] I like to giggle.

[00:37:56] I love to giggle with the face.

[00:37:57] There's nothing better.

[00:37:58] Nothing better than giggling with the face.

[00:38:00] It's also okay if you're a nervously shaking your dick.

[00:38:02] That's fine.

[00:38:03] Yes, I do that too.

[00:38:04] Does that your tik?

[00:38:05] I do- no, no, my tikka's I shake my leg.

[00:38:07] I have seen that before.

[00:38:08] Yeah.

[00:38:09] Yeah.

[00:38:10] With your hand you shake your leg.

[00:38:11] No.

[00:38:12] I was just doing that with my-

[00:38:13] My leg is constantly going.

[00:38:14] Yes.

[00:38:15] My leg's always like a fucking grasshopper.

[00:38:17] Wow.

[00:38:18] Right at him left the window.

[00:38:20] I left that seat because I'm right next to the window.

[00:38:22] He's hot from his pajamas.

[00:38:24] If you want to use scoop closer to Ian and the friction of him rubbing his leg against you.

[00:38:31] Sit on my lap and I'll warm you up.

[00:38:33] We can have a book fair of our own boys.

[00:38:35] Yeah.

[00:38:36] I think that's a really desperate-

[00:38:37] He's going to read.

[00:38:38] Why don't you sit on his lap?

[00:38:41] So that's so-

[00:38:42] So here's Ian and his friend having gay sex with each other at the book fair.

[00:38:45] You know what you call that?

[00:38:46] What?

[00:38:47] A reading rainbow.

[00:38:48] That's pretty good.

[00:38:49] There it is.

[00:38:51] Nicely done brother.

[00:38:53] Nicely done my friend.

[00:38:55] That was excellent.

[00:38:56] That was great.

[00:38:57] Well, now I can check out.

[00:38:59] All right.

[00:39:00] Well, we're done.

[00:39:01] Yeah.

[00:39:02] Put in your time card.

[00:39:03] I'm gonna just kill about-

[00:39:04] I'm gonna get seven more minutes until the next end.

[00:39:06] No, no, no, we're cruising.

[00:39:08] We're cruising?

[00:39:09] Yeah, right along.

[00:39:10] We got probably the book fair story and then we're good on the read.

[00:39:14] Yeah, we get to read.

[00:39:15] Hit the book fair again.

[00:39:16] Come back to the book fair.

[00:39:18] Yeah.

[00:39:19] Yeah, he hasn't given us a lot of like-

[00:39:22] Come back to the book fair.

[00:39:24] Like, what was the-

[00:39:25] The homosexual foreplay and then the homosexual sex and like-

[00:39:30] She's too close to having fun.

[00:39:31] The topping and the bottoming and the power dynamics.

[00:39:34] There's no penetration.

[00:39:35] What does that mean?

[00:39:36] No, no, and-

[00:39:37] Now, are you guys pre-pubescent at this point?

[00:39:40] Or are you-

[00:39:41] How old- what are you when you're like 11, 12?

[00:39:43] I don't know.

[00:39:44] That's a gray area for some people.

[00:39:45] I was jacking off at 11.

[00:39:47] Yeah, I was.

[00:39:48] I was not.

[00:39:49] I couldn't.

[00:39:50] Adam was definitely a child to lose about 17 years old.

[00:39:53] Yeah.

[00:39:54] He didn't have pubes.

[00:39:55] Yeah, I got some-

[00:39:56] Why'd you get pubes?

[00:39:57] I got pubes 24 years old.

[00:39:58] Sure.

[00:39:59] Yeah.

[00:40:00] Yeah.

[00:40:01] Yeah, I mean, I couldn't grow a beard until I was like 30.

[00:40:04] I got right after I got my license.

[00:40:06] That's 24.

[00:40:07] Yeah.

[00:40:08] Yeah.

[00:40:09] That's awesome.

[00:40:10] And right after my mother's abreast feet.

[00:40:12] That's the-

[00:40:13] He is loving it, dude.

[00:40:15] Yeah, he liked the second tag.

[00:40:18] Yeah.

[00:40:19] I love it.

[00:40:20] He just loves to support stuff like that.

[00:40:22] He's like, you do.

[00:40:23] Adam loves to support super-organics.

[00:40:25] Yeah, that's what I do.

[00:40:26] Wow.

[00:40:27] That's great.

[00:40:28] Not only super-organics, but also their new websites.

[00:40:31] Delta.

[00:40:32] No diet smoke.

[00:40:33] Diet smoke, which is-

[00:40:35] Delta 8.

[00:40:36] Mm-hmm.

[00:40:37] The good shit, which is not-

[00:40:39] Which is weed you could just bi-legally.

[00:40:41] Yeah, the delta.

[00:40:42] It's getting to the point now where it's like the-

[00:40:44] Wait, what is-

[00:40:45] The fake weed is like that soaking thing Mormons do.

[00:40:48] Yeah.

[00:40:49] Yeah.

[00:40:50] Delta 9 is definitely you-

[00:40:53] Wait, and this is a certain type of smoke?

[00:40:55] Yeah, so your friend-

[00:40:56] So these guys-

[00:40:57] Is it-

[00:40:58] These guys-

[00:40:59] Is it-

[00:41:00] Smoke on the water?

[00:41:01] All right.

[00:41:02] You want to know the answer to the question or not?

[00:41:06] Cut, can you cut-

[00:41:07] Yeah, cut that for a second.

[00:41:09] Okay, just-

[00:41:10] What is-

[00:41:10] That's-

[00:41:11] That's gotta be a euphemism for-

[00:41:12] Okay, is that-

[00:41:13] Smoke fair action.

[00:41:14] You're so-

[00:41:15] You wanna go have a smoke on the water?

[00:41:17] Yeah, so yeah.

[00:41:18] Yeah, yeah.

[00:41:19] We're gonna share a cigarette on the riverboat.

[00:41:20] You're now on-

[00:41:21] Your dick is the smoke.

[00:41:22] Yeah.

[00:41:23] The water as you piss in a little-

[00:41:24] Mm-hmm.

[00:41:25] And then a little bucket.

[00:41:26] Mm-hmm.

[00:41:27] And your dick is floating on the piss.

[00:41:28] Mm-hmm.

[00:41:29] And the bottom sucks your dick.

[00:41:31] You got to smoke on the water.

[00:41:33] Oh, yeah.

[00:41:34] Smoke on the water.

[00:41:35] Yeah, nice.

[00:41:36] I'm sure you've been on both sides of that.

[00:41:37] Smoke on the water.

[00:41:38] Just getting your dick smoked where you're still in a rock.

[00:41:39] Mm-hmm.

[00:41:40] Okay.

[00:41:41] I would like that too.

[00:41:42] Mm-hmm.

[00:41:43] Yeah.

[00:41:44] Diet smoke, it's super organic.

[00:41:45] These guys-

[00:41:46] These are some good guys.

[00:41:47] Yeah, they-

[00:41:48] The Cratum stuff.

[00:41:49] They have like nine different websites.

[00:41:50] And I'll tell you something.

[00:41:51] I'll tell you something as a lover of their product.

[00:41:53] Mm-hmm.

[00:41:54] I was the first to jump on the Diet Smoke bandwagon.

[00:41:56] Mm-hmm.

[00:41:57] Yeah.

[00:41:58] And I take it and-

[00:41:59] I took it to be like, well, kind of-

[00:42:03] I don't want to go the full bore.

[00:42:05] Mm-hmm.

[00:42:06] Took one of those bitches.

[00:42:07] Let's just say, I was having a good old time.

[00:42:10] Mm-hmm.

[00:42:11] You know what I'm saying?

[00:42:12] Yeah.

[00:42:13] I was basically-

[00:42:14] And maybe we're not supposed to say this.

[00:42:15] I was essentially high on marijuana.

[00:42:17] Mm-hmm.

[00:42:18] I haven't read the copy.

[00:42:20] I don't know what we're allowed to say.

[00:42:21] What is this thing?

[00:42:22] You're basically buying weed for real.

[00:42:24] It is a-

[00:42:25] It is not marijuana.

[00:42:27] Sorry.

[00:42:28] It says, feel free to riff on the engine.

[00:42:30] Well, we're riffing.

[00:42:31] We're riffing in a major way.

[00:42:33] First of all, the superorganics, the main thing is the crate, I guess.

[00:42:36] And you want to do that.

[00:42:37] And you want to do this?

[00:42:38] Yes.

[00:42:39] Shaul put on a drug test.

[00:42:40] Uh, crate on me?

[00:42:41] As weed.

[00:42:42] This super-

[00:42:43] eight stuff.

[00:42:44] I mean, I have-

[00:42:45] Oh, that's a great question.

[00:42:46] I have no way.

[00:42:47] Delta A.

[00:42:48] Metabolized in the same way that Delta 9 does in the human body.

[00:42:50] Therefore, there's no way for drug tests to tell the difference between the two cannabinoids.

[00:42:54] Mm-hmm.

[00:42:55] If you're regularly drug tested-

[00:42:56] That's good.

[00:42:57] I'm not sure many against it.

[00:42:58] So, using Delta A.

[00:42:59] So-

[00:43:00] This is straight up weed, bro.

[00:43:03] Oh my god.

[00:43:04] They're basically like, yeah, you'll fail drug tests.

[00:43:09] Sky check-

[00:43:10] Zandar.

[00:43:11] No one-

[00:43:12] Okay.

[00:43:13] You've got to be kidding and to tell you that.

[00:43:15] Nice, bro.

[00:43:16] Most of this joke is visual.

[00:43:18] So, you brought a book that has funny pictures.

[00:43:21] But you could speak it.

[00:43:23] Stylskitter Zandar.

[00:43:25] All right, sounds nothing like Italian.

[00:43:27] Yeah.

[00:43:28] And you're Italian.

[00:43:29] How do you say?

[00:43:30] Can I just say something?

[00:43:31] You're forcing the whole Italian thingy.

[00:43:33] No, I'm embracing it.

[00:43:34] My culture.

[00:43:35] You're white trash from Delaware.

[00:43:37] I'm Italian.

[00:43:38] It's all by.

[00:43:39] What was the last time a relative came from Italy?

[00:43:44] Bro, never.

[00:43:46] When was the last time there was even a relative that came to visit?

[00:43:51] Do you ever met-

[00:43:52] Have I ever met any relative?

[00:43:54] Any relative from Italy?

[00:43:56] Yeah.

[00:43:57] No.

[00:43:58] Do you have any?

[00:43:59] They're all dead.

[00:44:00] Okay.

[00:44:01] Wow, so you'd stop.

[00:44:02] That's not backfired for you.

[00:44:04] Yeah.

[00:44:05] No, he got him there.

[00:44:06] Memory alive.

[00:44:07] He has them.

[00:44:08] He just doesn't know them.

[00:44:09] How did they-

[00:44:10] They didn't all die.

[00:44:11] They just never met his father.

[00:44:12] Let's talk about super-

[00:44:13] Let's do it on topic.

[00:44:15] Yeah.

[00:44:16] Hey.

[00:44:17] Craterman is like, so heroin would be actual Italians.

[00:44:21] And Craterman is Ian in this game.

[00:44:23] Yeah, yeah, exactly.

[00:44:25] It's-

[00:44:26] Craterman is a metagon.

[00:44:27] Right.

[00:44:28] It's the gay version that only kept the loud part of the culture.

[00:44:33] Yeah.

[00:44:34] Everything else is, you know, a disgrace.

[00:44:38] It's too old to the old stock.

[00:44:40] He doesn't even talk with his hands because they're always filled with other man's cocks.

[00:44:44] They're always reading.

[00:44:46] Hey, listen, half the time?

[00:44:47] A woman's pussy.

[00:44:49] Yes.

[00:44:50] Or a woman's cock to give you full-

[00:44:52] All the-

[00:44:53] They're always full.

[00:44:54] Because I'm not trying to paint you as a homosexual.

[00:44:56] You're a bisexual.

[00:44:57] No, I'm a bisexual.

[00:44:58] Yeah.

[00:44:59] I'm with a gal.

[00:45:00] Cool.

[00:45:01] Yes.

[00:45:02] That's great.

[00:45:03] Yeah.

[00:45:04] At any minute, they're hunger cock.

[00:45:05] That cock hunger could strike.

[00:45:06] I feel like you're not-

[00:45:07] I'm in the werewolves.

[00:45:08] Yeah.

[00:45:09] Like, you know.

[00:45:10] No.

[00:45:11] What?

[00:45:12] I feel like you're not doing enough for the by-visibility movement.

[00:45:14] Yeah, there's a lot of by-erasure that happens.

[00:45:17] You don't-

[00:45:18] There is a lot of by-erasure that happens and I do speak out about it.

[00:45:21] Okay.

[00:45:22] Okay.

[00:45:23] Super-

[00:45:24] Organics.

[00:45:25] Right.

[00:45:26] Which you can go to getsuperleaf.com.

[00:45:27] Getsuperleaf.com to get the cash.

[00:45:29] Slash-com-town.

[00:45:30] Here's the thing.

[00:45:31] These are two completely, like separate companies even I think.

[00:45:34] Okay.

[00:45:35] Because one guy I talked to, he asked me about buying separate reads for the-

[00:45:39] Ah.

[00:45:40] And I said, I'm too tired to figure that out.

[00:45:42] Right.

[00:45:43] So I'll just give you free reads for both of your companies on the-

[00:45:45] Perfect.

[00:45:46] Same thing.

[00:45:47] I said I'm going to check with the cushy dream guys.

[00:45:48] Yeah.

[00:45:49] And I forgot to send that in.

[00:45:51] Hey, what are you going to do?

[00:45:53] Oh, well they're not.

[00:45:54] They're not competitors because cushy dreams is for the adults that smoke their seat.

[00:45:59] And they're sick and tired of vaporizing.

[00:46:01] And this is for the babies.

[00:46:03] They chew, they want gummies.

[00:46:05] So they're not competitors at all.

[00:46:07] And so you know what my problem-

[00:46:08] Different problems-

[00:46:09] You know my problem with-

[00:46:10] No, so this is actually weed.

[00:46:11] Sometimes you get so high it can be difficult to control to dose it right.

[00:46:16] Right.

[00:46:17] I think worse than being baked out of your mind when you didn't plan on it.

[00:46:20] Right.

[00:46:21] I'd say being violently raped in prison-

[00:46:23] Yeah, that's probably way worse.

[00:46:25] Just dying.

[00:46:26] Yeah.

[00:46:27] I actually do that quite a bit.

[00:46:28] Actually I get way too high.

[00:46:29] I get way too high.

[00:46:30] I get high all the time and I've never felt like getting raped.

[00:46:34] Mmm.

[00:46:35] And you know once you eat it there's no going back.

[00:46:38] You sit there suffering.

[00:46:39] Just don't out of your mind.

[00:46:41] Jesus.

[00:46:42] That's when I decided I needed the perfect medium high.

[00:46:45] But my friends at Diet Smoke for their delicious Delta A THC gummies.

[00:46:50] Diet Smoke isn't light.

[00:46:52] It's just right.

[00:46:53] The Goldilocks of you know smoke.

[00:46:56] Fake weed.

[00:46:57] Yeah.

[00:46:58] And also that is psychoactive.

[00:47:01] And cushy dreams is non-psychotic.

[00:47:04] It is not.

[00:47:05] What's the difference?

[00:47:06] I just said it.

[00:47:07] Mmm.

[00:47:08] We should probably not mix the two.

[00:47:10] Right.

[00:47:11] They particularly should say the other-

[00:47:14] The brain's name.

[00:47:16] We definitely probably-

[00:47:18] Anybody has a problem with that?

[00:47:19] We have a gun.

[00:47:20] Mmm.

[00:47:21] So try this fucking piece of shit.

[00:47:23] It's also psycho fucking piece of fucking shit.

[00:47:26] Yeah, it's companies.

[00:47:28] Yeah.

[00:47:29] Yeah.

[00:47:30] Oh fuck.

[00:47:31] Oh fuck.

[00:47:32] Yeah.

[00:47:33] Yeah.

[00:47:34] Yeah.

[00:47:35] Yeah.

[00:47:36] Yeah.

[00:47:37] Well you do want an assortment right?

[00:47:38] You do want an assortment.

[00:47:39] Yeah.

[00:47:40] Yeah.

[00:47:41] You do want an assortment right?

[00:47:44] You do have a couple of rims.

[00:47:45] Because if you're a fan of this show,

[00:47:47] when all of your friends come over.

[00:47:49] Yeah.

[00:47:50] You're going to want to have options.

[00:47:52] For sure.

[00:47:53] Yeah.

[00:47:54] And not just your friends,

[00:47:55] but the girls, the girls,

[00:47:56] the fucking-

[00:47:57] Yeah.

[00:47:58] You're going to want to have one more.

[00:48:00] Yeah.

[00:48:01] Yeah.

[00:48:02] Go to dietsmoke.com and use the smoke.com.

[00:48:10] It's smoke.com.

[00:48:11] And it says that's two zero off.

[00:48:12] Twenty percent.

[00:48:13] So I think they- I think it's twenty percent.

[00:48:15] Well it says go to dietsmoke.com and use the promo code

[00:48:18] comtown for twenty percent off your order.

[00:48:21] That's two zero OFF.

[00:48:23] So they spelled the discount.

[00:48:26] So you know how to say it.

[00:48:29] Yeah.

[00:48:30] Yeah.

[00:48:31] Nice.

[00:48:32] And also we want you to go to dietsmoke.com and use the promo code

[00:48:34] comtown for twenty percent off your order.

[00:48:36] That's two zero OFF.

[00:48:37] So they spelled the discount.

[00:48:38] Yeah.

[00:48:40] And also we want you to go to get superleaf.com

[00:48:42] slash comtown for twenty percent off your entire order.

[00:48:45] Right.

[00:48:46] And the promo code for that is also comtown.

[00:48:48] So that's get superleaf.com slash comtown promo code

[00:48:51] comtown for twenty percent off.

[00:48:53] Yeah.

[00:48:54] And that's so fucking true.

[00:48:55] Yeah, that's true.

[00:48:56] And so back to that book fair.

[00:48:58] Yeah.

[00:48:59] That's terrible.

[00:49:01] Let's hear the rest of the story.

[00:49:03] So you see him.

[00:49:04] He's looking hot.

[00:49:05] It's fifth grade.

[00:49:06] He's got a little hot.

[00:49:07] What's he wearing?

[00:49:08] He's wearing a beautiful boy.

[00:49:09] You guys prepubescent or is there a split?

[00:49:12] He's a fully grown man.

[00:49:13] You're a child.

[00:49:14] You're a child.

[00:49:15] No.

[00:49:16] No.

[00:49:17] You're same as the beginning of puberty.

[00:49:19] Totally same.

[00:49:21] Awesome.

[00:49:22] Totally same.

[00:49:23] And the vibes are right and you guys left the blue one.

[00:49:25] Did you guys at grade school have to shower with other guys?

[00:49:28] Absolutely not.

[00:49:29] No.

[00:49:30] No.

[00:49:31] Just with the guy teachers.

[00:49:32] Yeah.

[00:49:33] Watching you?

[00:49:34] No.

[00:49:35] Shower with them.

[00:49:36] Naked.

[00:49:37] No.

[00:49:38] No.

[00:49:39] No.

[00:49:40] No.

[00:49:41] No.

[00:49:42] No.

[00:49:43] Don't make a sound cue.

[00:49:44] Yeah.

[00:49:45] If you had it, you should have done it.

[00:49:46] It's off too.

[00:49:47] You can't.

[00:49:48] My battery is dying.

[00:49:49] You can't take a seven second beat.

[00:49:52] Take the cord away.

[00:49:53] Just repeat it again.

[00:49:55] Which one were you going to use?

[00:49:58] That's a huge herb.

[00:49:59] Yeah.

[00:50:00] You're going to use curd.

[00:50:01] So you had to shower with other children?

[00:50:03] Dude.

[00:50:04] We went to like an all boys school.

[00:50:07] As like part of the health code or whatever, you had to shower after gym.

[00:50:11] And that was like part of it.

[00:50:12] It's a Catholic school.

[00:50:13] Yeah.

[00:50:14] Like you started gase it up.

[00:50:15] You went to an all boys Catholic school.

[00:50:16] Was it a Catholic school?

[00:50:17] When I was like for a couple of grades.

[00:50:19] Yeah.

[00:50:20] Yeah.

[00:50:21] And then we...

[00:50:22] What's the deal with Catholic school?

[00:50:23] It's like hated it.

[00:50:24] It's private school or...

[00:50:25] It's private.

[00:50:26] Okay.

[00:50:27] We all hated it.

[00:50:28] So we would just like wash our heads in the sink and then put our clothes on and be like,

[00:50:31] we showered.

[00:50:32] And then you would get the detention if you got caught like not shower.

[00:50:34] It's like very weird.

[00:50:35] You have to be...

[00:50:36] When my mom was like...

[00:50:37] You had to go to church in school?

[00:50:39] Well, you have like religion classes.

[00:50:41] You have to have school.

[00:50:42] The class is...

[00:50:43] You have probably had chapel at the beginning.

[00:50:44] Yeah.

[00:50:45] And then during like Lent and Advent, they'd have church before school at like 730 in the

[00:50:49] morning on the Tuesdays and Thursdays.

[00:50:51] Some of us would go that we're trying to repent for this.

[00:50:54] Oh, he's wanting to...

[00:50:55] I always wanted to be a uniform.

[00:50:56] I thought that would be cool.

[00:50:57] Yeah.

[00:50:58] Just all black suits with little caps with skulls and bones on your face.

[00:51:02] Oh, yeah.

[00:51:03] That would be cool school.

[00:51:04] Like a Nazi.

[00:51:05] Yeah.

[00:51:06] Well, I wasn't even thinking about it.

[00:51:07] That's kind of a...

[00:51:08] I was imagining it just like...

[00:51:09] SS universe.

[00:51:10] Now that I think about it, yeah.

[00:51:11] Yeah.

[00:51:12] With the Sig runes.

[00:51:13] Yep.

[00:51:14] That's what I was thinking of.

[00:51:15] Yeah, that's skulls on the ass.

[00:51:16] Yeah.

[00:51:17] Maybe a different uniform.

[00:51:19] Yeah.

[00:51:20] Yeah.

[00:51:21] But that is the one you were thinking.

[00:51:22] Maybe it's just a baseball cap with a swastika on it.

[00:51:24] Yeah.

[00:51:25] Darry, turn my...

[00:51:26] I had a sound cue with that.

[00:51:27] Well, that's just a baseball uniform.

[00:51:28] Go ahead.

[00:51:29] I'm sure it would have been perfectly timed.

[00:51:31] No, no, no.

[00:51:32] No, no, no.

[00:51:33] No, no, no.

[00:51:34] No, no, no.

[00:51:35] You have to do it.

[00:51:36] So it turns out that your private Catholic school boy uniform is a Nazi uniform.

[00:51:38] What?

[00:51:39] Oh, he's...

[00:51:40] Okay.

[00:51:41] All right.

[00:51:42] Just go back to his...

[00:51:43] Oh, my God.

[00:51:44] Oh, my God.

[00:51:45] Okay.

[00:51:46] Let's get back to his heart.

[00:51:47] Oh, my God.

[00:51:48] Oh, my God.

[00:51:49] Oh, my God.

[00:51:50] Oh, my God.

[00:51:51] Oh, my God.

[00:51:52] Oh, my God.

[00:51:53] Oh, my God.

[00:51:54] Oh, my God.

[00:51:55] Oh, my God.

[00:51:56] Oh, my God.

[00:51:57] Oh, my God.

[00:51:58] Oh, my God.

[00:51:59] Just get back to this hot gay story that we're asking.

[00:52:01] You don't fuck like a Chinese guy that's really good at karate.

[00:52:08] Have you?

[00:52:11] Is this story technically in the chat?

[00:52:15] No.

[00:52:17] But...

[00:52:18] I did ask...

[00:52:19] Let me do this.

[00:52:20] Do me a favor.

[00:52:21] Fuck a Korean guy.

[00:52:22] Let me know how it is.

[00:52:23] You all right?

[00:52:24] He just did his funny bone.

[00:52:25] I'm sorry, dude.

[00:52:26] Yeah.

[00:52:27] Have you ever fucked a Korean guy?

[00:52:28] or Chinese but he was dressed as a girl overseas.

[00:52:32] You can't tell by the asshole.

[00:52:34] No, no, we didn't get that far.

[00:52:38] Oh, that's a shame.

[00:52:40] We didn't get that far.

[00:52:40] No, we fold around and I came very quickly.

[00:52:45] Oh, yeah?

[00:52:46] So he ends behind him and then the Asian guy goes,

[00:52:49] Chinese fire drill and he runs around foxy interview.

[00:52:52] That's good stuff, man.

[00:53:01] Yeah.

[00:53:02] Do you guys make the dragon together?

[00:53:04] What's that?

[00:53:04] You know, the big dragon they walk around.

[00:53:08] I thought there was a sex move.

[00:53:09] Well, no.

[00:53:10] Oh, OK.

[00:53:11] OK, so back.

[00:53:13] So you guys, Chinese guy.

[00:53:14] Wait, hold on.

[00:53:14] Question.

[00:53:15] Yeah.

[00:53:16] None of you guys ever fooled around with a guy

[00:53:19] when you were younger.

[00:53:21] Because it's a very normal childhood thing for boys

[00:53:25] to fool around once or twice and just never again.

[00:53:29] I've told this story before, but I asked my neighbor

[00:53:32] when we were both five to show me his cock.

[00:53:34] So I shot my shot at being gay, but I failed.

[00:53:37] And he was like, I'm good.

[00:53:39] Really?

[00:53:39] Yeah, yeah.

[00:53:40] How did you feel?

[00:53:42] Like, what's your name?

[00:53:43] All right, whatever.

[00:53:43] I don't give a fuck.

[00:53:44] I did it mostly as a rebellious thing because we had just

[00:53:49] that day in school.

[00:53:50] Mm-hmm.

[00:53:51] They had told us, don't show your privates to a stranger.

[00:53:55] Mm-hmm, yeah.

[00:53:56] Don't show.

[00:53:57] They told us there was, like, bad to fly to show people

[00:53:59] your cock.

[00:54:00] So I was like, maybe me and this guy

[00:54:02] could show each other.

[00:54:03] Maybe there's something cool about it.

[00:54:04] Yeah.

[00:54:04] They're not telling us about what all there is.

[00:54:07] Yeah.

[00:54:08] Yeah.

[00:54:09] Yeah.

[00:54:10] Yeah.

[00:54:11] But yeah, unfortunately, dude.

[00:54:12] Yeah.

[00:54:13] After that, my confidence was shaking

[00:54:15] and I never did any gay shit.

[00:54:17] But see, I think a lot of kids do that.

[00:54:19] A lot of guys do that.

[00:54:20] And then they think that it makes them gay.

[00:54:22] And then they have that in their head

[00:54:24] for, like, the rest of their life.

[00:54:25] And it totally does not.

[00:54:26] Yeah.

[00:54:27] No, I mean, I've done it.

[00:54:28] It's doing it over and over and over again.

[00:54:29] I've told this story before.

[00:54:31] And I don't know.

[00:54:32] Just I don't want to blow up anybody's spot.

[00:54:34] But there was, like, older.

[00:54:36] It was like his aunt lived in the neighborhood.

[00:54:38] He would come visit an older kid.

[00:54:40] And he would be like, let me suck your dick.

[00:54:42] Right.

[00:54:42] And I'd love to do that a bunch.

[00:54:43] But then he would be like, you know, you do it to me.

[00:54:46] And I'm like, no, I'm not doing it.

[00:54:47] Yeah, right.

[00:54:48] Right.

[00:54:48] And then I dodged a bullet.

[00:54:51] Yeah.

[00:54:54] He was like your bitch, right?

[00:54:56] Yeah.

[00:54:56] Yeah.

[00:54:57] No, well, I think I mentioned this before.

[00:55:01] One time he had, like, a little sick.

[00:55:02] Because that kid must have been getting, like,

[00:55:04] fucking molested or so.

[00:55:05] Probably.

[00:55:06] Yes.

[00:55:06] And he had, like, a little sister.

[00:55:08] And I remember one time, like, he had her squat over his head.

[00:55:13] Oh, no.

[00:55:14] Unlike a transformer.

[00:55:15] You know, there's, like, transformer boxes.

[00:55:16] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:55:17] And piss into his mouth.

[00:55:20] Broad daylight.

[00:55:21] Whoa.

[00:55:22] And then he was like, try it.

[00:55:23] It tastes like beer.

[00:55:24] And it's like, you shouldn't be drinking beer.

[00:55:26] Yeah, yeah, damn.

[00:55:27] This kid was getting fucked.

[00:55:28] Yeah.

[00:55:29] Yeah.

[00:55:29] That poor fucking kid.

[00:55:30] But he probably liked.

[00:55:31] He probably thought you were a cool guy,

[00:55:32] if you wanted to suck your cock.

[00:55:33] Yeah.

[00:55:34] I mean, it made me give me the opposite.

[00:55:36] A lot of confidence.

[00:55:37] Yeah.

[00:55:37] Yeah.

[00:55:38] Yeah.

[00:55:39] I wish some guy wanted to suck my dick when I was a kid.

[00:55:43] And then you get older and you're like,

[00:55:44] then you find out that's gay and you're like, damn.

[00:55:46] You can't.

[00:55:47] Wait, that doesn't count?

[00:55:49] Yeah.

[00:55:49] Yeah, it's all.

[00:55:50] Yeah.

[00:55:51] It just seemed like an awesome thing.

[00:55:52] Yeah.

[00:55:53] Look at an awesome little trick.

[00:55:55] No, I do.

[00:55:55] There's just so many guys.

[00:55:57] I know, I mean, I know what you're saying,

[00:55:59] but I know a bunch of people that have been like,

[00:56:01] yeah, I've sucked the dick one time.

[00:56:03] Yeah.

[00:56:04] Well, I think straight people.

[00:56:05] Also, it did fuck with me, but I remember of course.

[00:56:08] There was like an anonymous confession website.

[00:56:11] Like, like, a long time ago, like 2000.

[00:56:14] Yeah.

[00:56:15] I forget the name on it.

[00:56:15] Remember Post Secret?

[00:56:17] I don't, but that wasn't it.

[00:56:19] And girls were really awesome.

[00:56:20] Like, 95% of them were just, you know, when I was like,

[00:56:24] six, I was so up my cousin's dick,

[00:56:25] and now I want to kill myself.

[00:56:26] Right.

[00:56:27] Yeah.

[00:56:27] There's just a lot of people like that.

[00:56:28] Yeah.

[00:56:28] Yeah.

[00:56:29] Yeah.

[00:56:29] Yeah.

[00:56:29] Damn.

[00:56:30] Yeah, no.

[00:56:30] And then I was like, oh, the list.

[00:56:31] I think I was just a coward.

[00:56:33] Yeah.

[00:56:33] Because I tried with that one guy.

[00:56:34] And then I never tried it.

[00:56:35] And then I never, I had a weird, like, my partner.

[00:56:41] I think I mentioned this before.

[00:56:42] My partner in kindergarten.

[00:56:43] Oh, it's in your head.

[00:56:44] It's a husband.

[00:56:44] Yeah.

[00:56:45] My husband.

[00:56:46] Yeah, I don't know.

[00:56:46] Like, she was a little white-tracked girl.

[00:56:48] Like a civil union.

[00:56:49] I wish.

[00:56:50] So she was like, whoa.

[00:56:51] So you called her partner?

[00:56:52] We would call each other partner.

[00:56:53] No, she was like, show him his partner.

[00:56:55] She was like, show him his partner.

[00:56:57] Yeah, yeah.

[00:56:58] And then she found out her clique was bigger than yours.

[00:57:00] And she broke out with you.

[00:57:00] No.

[00:57:02] My dick was the same size as it is now.

[00:57:04] Thank you very much.

[00:57:05] A fully adult man's penis.

[00:57:07] I don't have a child's penis.

[00:57:08] I don't have a child's penis.

[00:57:09] I'm not going to say a son.

[00:57:10] I don't have a baby's penis.

[00:57:12] I had a full-growth penis as a baby.

[00:57:14] That has to have happened to somebody

[00:57:16] where they had like a small adult's penis growing up.

[00:57:18] Yeah.

[00:57:19] And they were like, fuck, yeah.

[00:57:20] Yeah.

[00:57:20] Oh, yeah.

[00:57:21] Yeah.

[00:57:22] You're just like never having a gross bird?

[00:57:24] Yeah.

[00:57:24] Literally that.

[00:57:25] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:57:26] That's true.

[00:57:27] It probably definitely has.

[00:57:28] Dude, I remember a kid I knew, like a girlfriend,

[00:57:31] was like, oh my god, he has a huge penis.

[00:57:34] It's like an adult.

[00:57:35] And then you just turn into a dust cloud outline.

[00:57:38] Yeah.

[00:57:39] And then I heard a rumor in high school

[00:57:47] that he had like a massively small penis.

[00:57:49] I was like, oh, I guess he just had a dull.

[00:57:50] They should say it that way.

[00:57:52] That sounds cool.

[00:57:52] Yeah.

[00:57:53] He's got like a massively small penis.

[00:57:55] He's got like a monster.

[00:57:57] Yeah.

[00:57:58] It's like a compliment.

[00:57:59] It's like a nice for a tattoo.

[00:58:01] Yeah.

[00:58:03] He's got a monster small dick.

[00:58:05] That's cool.

[00:58:06] That's fun.

[00:58:06] Dude, that's awesome.

[00:58:07] That's me.

[00:58:08] Also another weird thing that happened.

[00:58:10] There was like this rumor about this girl.

[00:58:12] It was like a slut.

[00:58:13] And she like ate M&M's out of this guy's ass.

[00:58:16] And I was like, oh my god, she's such a slut.

[00:58:18] What a gross fucking slut.

[00:58:20] What a fucking slut.

[00:58:20] I don't know.

[00:58:22] But it's like, why did everyone hate her

[00:58:24] and think she was a slut?

[00:58:25] And not going to tell.

[00:58:26] Why are you asking someone to eat M&M's out of your ass?

[00:58:31] Wasn't that?

[00:58:32] Can you dress up like Santa and eat M&M's out of your ass?

[00:58:34] That's messed up, right?

[00:58:35] I'm sorry, and say they do exist.

[00:58:38] Yeah.

[00:58:39] Just the red and yellow M&M being like, how the fuck

[00:58:47] are we going to get out of here?

[00:58:49] They just didn't ask.

[00:58:50] They're like, what is this commercial?

[00:58:52] And he's like, well, in high school.

[00:58:54] I thought that was common.

[00:58:55] My friend told me a lot of people blow each other.

[00:58:58] So I figured it was pretty common to people

[00:59:00] ate M&M's out of each other's asses.

[00:59:02] And now I'm a creative director.

[00:59:06] And we're so happy to have you here.

[00:59:08] And my name is David Blake.

[00:59:10] What?

[00:59:11] I was going to say my name is Bethie.

[00:59:13] You're bad with a microphone.

[00:59:14] I'm sorry, sorry.

[00:59:15] Your job is exclusively on microphone.

[00:59:18] I know.

[00:59:18] You're both a stand up, pull away, because when I laugh,

[00:59:22] I move my hands like that.

[00:59:24] Yeah.

[00:59:25] We were a funny story about, I'll say his name or not,

[00:59:30] but, Stav, what do you think about what?

[00:59:35] I would say no.

[00:59:36] I'm going to go with my friend.

[00:59:37] Our friend blowing some set, because he held the mic.

[00:59:41] Oh, yeah.

[00:59:41] I don't want to.

[00:59:42] Oh, OK.

[00:59:43] Oh, OK.

[00:59:43] What is this funny?

[00:59:44] But it's funny, because I've always, when I did stand up,

[00:59:48] before I quit to explore what happened in elementary school

[00:59:53] with my friend.

[00:59:54] Yeah.

[00:59:56] You do some deep thinking?

[00:59:57] Yeah, no.

[00:59:58] I would always re-read your past.

[00:59:59] Yeah, because I would always just hold a mic on my chin,

[01:00:02] so I know I'm talking into it.

[01:00:04] But then I would tape sets, and you can't see my mouth.

[01:00:06] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[01:00:07] And it kind of fucks up.

[01:00:08] Anytime I saw somebody that could hold a mic, you know,

[01:00:11] further away, I should figure out how to do that.

[01:00:15] I used to do that, because I used to hold the mic in one hand

[01:00:17] and walk around, and I would hold it down,

[01:00:19] and kind of like, yeah, now I hold.

[01:00:20] What are you laughing at?

[01:00:21] I used to do a hand free to do fucking somersaults.

[01:00:24] Yeah, now I'm hands free so I can be as Italian,

[01:00:27] and gay as I want.

[01:00:28] Now Ian brings his own Janet Jackson style microphone.

[01:00:30] Yeah, I have it at your set.

[01:00:32] Corey Raft dances.

[01:00:34] It's amazing.

[01:00:36] Yeah, man.

[01:00:37] But I'm sorry to cut you off, Ian.

[01:00:39] No, that's all good.

[01:00:40] That chili smells so good.

[01:00:42] Yeah, he's getting, or Elders is getting busy in the kitchen.

[01:00:44] Well, Elders is gone now.

[01:00:46] Are we going to go get marshmallows?

[01:00:49] Oh, yeah, we're going to make a fire in the backyard.

[01:00:51] Yeah.

[01:00:52] I can change out of the pajamas.

[01:00:53] He's got a row of boots you can put on.

[01:00:55] I got row of boots.

[01:00:56] Go out back.

[01:00:57] You're going to get on the pajama train, dude.

[01:00:59] I'm going to fuck with pajamas.

[01:01:00] I'm not anti-pajama.

[01:01:02] It feels so good to shower and put on clean pajamas.

[01:01:06] Did you have multiple sets?

[01:01:08] I really don't like, I don't like, you don't like pajamas.

[01:01:10] No, I don't like the idea of that.

[01:01:12] Why?

[01:01:13] I'm with you.

[01:01:14] I have to sleep in just underwear.

[01:01:16] Actually, I'm with you.

[01:01:17] But I think as, in terms of evening lounge wear,

[01:01:20] I like the idea of being in my house at 8 p.m.

[01:01:22] Nothing to do.

[01:01:23] Fresh shower.

[01:01:24] That's what men used to do.

[01:01:26] And I like it.

[01:01:27] I feel like I'm taking them off and folding them.

[01:01:30] I'm becoming an old man, yes.

[01:01:30] Take them off and fold them before I get posted.

[01:01:33] And I have a big coffee thermos I carry around with.

[01:01:35] We talked about it, but I don't really like it.

[01:01:37] Sometimes when I get too comfortable,

[01:01:39] I feel claustrophobic.

[01:01:41] Yes, you have to love getting it,

[01:01:42] because that one of the thoughts come back.

[01:01:45] Yeah, but more like I feel like I'm in like a coffin.

[01:01:48] No one's home.

[01:01:49] Yeah, Nick is a shoes in the house guy.

[01:01:52] Yeah, fully closed.

[01:01:53] Yeah, even at home alone, I'm like.

[01:01:54] He can't really chill.

[01:01:55] I'll never, yeah.

[01:01:57] That's crazy.

[01:01:58] I think a shower I get dressed immediately.

[01:01:59] What about this?

[01:02:00] Would you put on?

[01:02:01] Wait, what do you do?

[01:02:01] Yeah, I get dressed immediately.

[01:02:04] After you shower.

[01:02:04] After I shower.

[01:02:05] It's on home.

[01:02:06] When you're wet.

[01:02:07] Yeah.

[01:02:08] It's on home.

[01:02:09] Like he's splitting a hotel room with his friend.

[01:02:11] I do that.

[01:02:11] Unless it's nighttime.

[01:02:13] But I immediately get dressed afterwards.

[01:02:15] I don't want to wear it like in my room.

[01:02:17] It's kind of weird that guy Hugh Hefner, he only wore pajamas.

[01:02:21] But he didn't leave his house.

[01:02:23] So he was only at home.

[01:02:24] He was a shut in.

[01:02:25] He was?

[01:02:26] I don't know.

[01:02:27] He didn't really leave.

[01:02:28] I mean, when he left his home, he was a bunch of hoars.

[01:02:30] That's pretty sick.

[01:02:31] He had everything in his head.

[01:02:33] Yeah.

[01:02:34] He would just send a whore on an errand.

[01:02:36] He'd need to tell me.

[01:02:36] He'd need to tell me.

[01:02:37] He'd need to tell me.

[01:02:38] My favorite thing about him was that he had like scheduled

[01:02:41] relationships.

[01:02:42] Like this is my girlfriend for like six months.

[01:02:45] Jesus.

[01:02:45] And then you get traded out for somebody else.

[01:02:47] The main new model.

[01:02:49] The main one was Heidi.

[01:02:50] I remember.

[01:02:51] Yeah.

[01:02:51] Yes.

[01:02:52] And I jacked off to Kendall as well.

[01:02:55] Kendall?

[01:02:56] No.

[01:02:56] She was like, you jacked off to a Kendall?

[01:02:58] Yeah.

[01:02:59] She was like, wow.

[01:02:59] Finally, a man with a smaller penis.

[01:03:03] There's, I've seen at least like a couple pictures of people

[01:03:07] in line.

[01:03:07] Instead of Fat Barbie, they should have just done Fat

[01:03:09] Ken with money.

[01:03:11] Yeah.

[01:03:11] Fat girl Ken.

[01:03:12] Yeah, baby.

[01:03:13] But he's nice to Barbie.

[01:03:14] But he's cool.

[01:03:15] He's nice.

[01:03:16] He knows good restaurants.

[01:03:17] Mm-hmm.

[01:03:19] He gets you an Uber home because he's a good guy.

[01:03:22] Yeah.

[01:03:23] Fuck.

[01:03:24] This mic, man.

[01:03:25] Dude, have you ever tried slippers?

[01:03:26] Yeah.

[01:03:27] And who's full?

[01:03:27] I didn't.

[01:03:28] I didn't.

[01:03:28] I don't like them, dude.

[01:03:29] No?

[01:03:30] Yeah.

[01:03:30] I don't.

[01:03:30] You got to wear shoes.

[01:03:31] Well, yeah.

[01:03:32] I have to be fully dressed.

[01:03:33] I don't like, yeah.

[01:03:34] Not have it.

[01:03:34] Yeah.

[01:03:35] Right.

[01:03:35] Nick is a zipper down sex guy.

[01:03:38] Yeah.

[01:03:38] What's that?

[01:03:39] I've put my dog in the leash.

[01:03:40] Through the zippers, fully dressed.

[01:03:42] Yeah.

[01:03:43] When you're doing it in public or at home?

[01:03:44] At home.

[01:03:45] At home?

[01:03:45] What?

[01:03:46] He would never do it in public.

[01:03:47] He's not a degenerate.

[01:03:48] Yeah, I'm not a degenerate.

[01:03:50] In fact, even at home, I often don't.

[01:03:53] Yeah.

[01:03:55] Even when you're doing it missionary.

[01:03:57] No.

[01:03:58] Yeah.

[01:03:58] You leave your jeans on.

[01:04:00] I'm completely close.

[01:04:01] No.

[01:04:03] He is.

[01:04:04] He is, dude.

[01:04:05] You don't use.

[01:04:06] Why are you laughing at him?

[01:04:08] Why are you laughing at him?

[01:04:09] I'm laughing with him.

[01:04:09] We've never laughed at him.

[01:04:11] I'm laughing at him.

[01:04:11] Because he's a hole in the front.

[01:04:13] I've never laughed at him.

[01:04:14] I've never laughed at him.

[01:04:15] I've never laughed at him.

[01:04:17] I have a zipper in the back.

[01:04:19] Why am laughing at him?

[01:04:20] Yeah, I hate like a nice sweater.

[01:04:22] Like, we have to wear a sweater to, like, Thanksgiving dinner.

[01:04:25] Right.

[01:04:25] Yeah.

[01:04:26] Really makes me uncomfortable.

[01:04:27] What would you rather wear?

[01:04:29] What's that?

[01:04:29] What would you rather wear?

[01:04:30] Just a t-shirt?

[01:04:31] Yeah, I guess.

[01:04:32] Yeah, just, you know, jeans and a t-shirt.

[01:04:34] You never liked the throwing a nice little sweater?

[01:04:36] No, you might have to wear it.

[01:04:37] Like, when I had to go to the last time I had to wear a suit

[01:04:39] was for Racine's wedding, I think.

[01:04:41] And yeah, just a super round.

[01:04:42] Oh, dude.

[01:04:43] A suit?

[01:04:43] You feel fucking awesome.

[01:04:44] No, I hate it.

[01:04:45] I don't like.

[01:04:46] You feel like fucking James Bond, Keanu Reeves, fucking mafia,

[01:04:51] guys.

[01:04:51] A lot of cool guys wore suits.

[01:04:54] You never feel like James Dean, fucking Dino Martin,

[01:04:58] Dean Martin.

[01:04:58] Dean Martin.

[01:04:59] Hey, mambo.

[01:05:01] Mambo Italiano.

[01:05:02] Go, go, go.

[01:05:05] That's awesome, dude.

[01:05:07] That's a rosemary cloonie, isn't it?

[01:05:09] I believe so.

[01:05:11] Yeah.

[01:05:11] It's not Dean Martin.

[01:05:12] It's a woman.

[01:05:14] Dean Martin.

[01:05:15] Does Mambo Italiano?

[01:05:17] I'm sure there's a recording.

[01:05:18] I'm sure he's covered.

[01:05:20] Well, you are Italian, I guess.

[01:05:21] Yeah, I would be the one that knows.

[01:05:23] Mambo Italiano is what they called their relationship.

[01:05:28] It's a book for me.

[01:05:30] It's African boyfriend.

[01:05:31] It's very good.

[01:05:33] So I can only riff on that topic.

[01:05:36] That's perfect.

[01:05:37] Until we mine the book fair.

[01:05:38] We have so much.

[01:05:40] We've barely taken a bite out of the book fair.

[01:05:42] It's a giant turkey leg.

[01:05:43] And we've nibbled.

[01:05:45] You've got to leave them wanting more.

[01:05:47] No.

[01:05:48] You got to be late.

[01:05:49] No.

[01:05:50] You've got to leave them.

[01:05:51] Just dive into the book.

[01:05:52] Dive in.

[01:05:53] You're right.

[01:05:53] We're going to have you back.

[01:05:54] You know when you call a guy you're

[01:05:55] about to cruise with the book fair?

[01:05:56] What?

[01:05:57] A bookmark.

[01:05:57] You know what I'm saying?

[01:06:01] Nice.

[01:06:01] That's good, man.

[01:06:02] Yeah.

[01:06:03] We're doing good.

[01:06:05] Woo.

[01:06:06] Yeah.

[01:06:07] Nice.

[01:06:07] Yeah, we're good.

[01:06:08] Yeah.

[01:06:09] It's awesome.

[01:06:09] Well, Ian, thank you for being on the show.

[01:06:12] Thank you for having me.

[01:06:13] Thank you for the sleepover too.

[01:06:14] This has been fun.

[01:06:15] Yeah.

[01:06:15] Thank you to you, the listener.

[01:06:18] Yeah.

[01:06:21] Where is it?