Cum Town | Regular | 02/17/2022
[00:00:15] Well I was born February Pina's 19th Dec.
[00:00:23] Tomorrow I'll be in Austin all through the weekend.
[00:00:27] I'll be in Dallas on Sunday, then San Francisco, Vancouver,
[00:00:34] And this weekend I'm in Boston at hideout comedy.
[00:00:45] I like just getting months out of the way.
[00:00:47] And the fact that it's shorter than the rest.
[00:00:49] Well, and also it was just my birthday.
[00:00:52] We were just all in Vegas for my birthday.
[00:00:57] We did Halkeyses 3, where we showed up to Vegas with guns.
[00:01:02] And we were like, give us all the fucking money you got.
[00:01:25] You were sneaking in through the bench.
[00:01:29] I was both George Clooney and Brad Pitt.
[00:01:46] Honestly, if me as an old man could have that style.
[00:01:51] Let's be honest, has Scott and smoking jacket.
[00:01:55] There's a way my life goes where I end up like that.
[00:01:57] Yeah, but you don't have the Jewish soul to fill it out.
[00:02:11] And in fact, we are currently watching Texas Storage
[00:02:22] True, Texas Bullshit Wars is what I call it.
[00:02:31] I think you have to use the Apple remote for the volume.
[00:02:38] So you need to fucking get your sightlines correct, bro.
[00:02:44] You got to go to Radio Shack for that, huh?
[00:02:49] No, you don't think of a fucking Radio Shack.
[00:03:01] You got to talk to a doctor since your dick is not
[00:03:08] All the people I go to see in my life chicks.
[00:03:12] No, you hot chick doctors, hot chick therapists.
[00:03:32] It's interesting, because women don't like you,
[00:03:34] but it's not that much of a bro, either.
[00:03:37] You just don't really have that many corners in the world
[00:03:49] They don't think I'm going to rape them,
[00:04:01] How are they going to just have a new chain pizza?
[00:04:09] Oh, we got Terry Bradshaw on a commercial for publishers.
[00:04:15] Oh, I was pissed off that he replaced that.
[00:04:16] McMahon, but I realized he's been dead for years.
[00:04:23] The country singing quarterback from the.
[00:04:26] Did you guys think when you were little kids
[00:04:27] that you could possibly win the publisher's clearinghouse?
[00:04:35] I was like, fuck dude, I could be rich.
[00:04:38] Like from a little, I was a little ass kid.
[00:04:45] I remember the first time I saw that commercial
[00:04:51] Where they would knock, they like did extended commercials
[00:05:00] whenever anybody knocked on the door, I was like, oh, hell yeah.
[00:05:09] But I was, I was fucking like a fat little six year olds
[00:05:16] I did wish that my parents weren't Jewish.
[00:05:27] Well, it seems like Fios is getting one star.
[00:05:31] It's probably the piece of shit airport extreme.
[00:05:37] Wow, it looks like Apple is getting one star.
[00:05:40] It's funny, I guess I had to cancel optimum to get this.
[00:05:43] Anytime you need to cancel service or downgrade service,
[00:05:46] they just connect you with your retention department.
[00:05:51] Yeah, they put you on with a spicy Latina.
[00:05:56] It's like, yeah, I need to cancel my service.
[00:06:01] So what do you mean you need to cancel?
[00:06:06] Because we can actually get you a better price.
[00:06:20] Now maybe you can wait around for some Indian guy.
[00:06:27] And then you can take your Otesla generic brand
[00:06:32] I think it's for some kind of skin disease.
[00:06:35] It seems like it's if you're addicted to going on boats
[00:06:42] This guy immediately just gets beaten up.
[00:06:46] Seems like a commercial that I could maybe go out for someday.
[00:06:54] I would probably fuck her if I was in the commercial.
[00:07:00] I'd be like, you know the character is gay,
[00:07:02] but in real life, I'm unthreatening and unlikable.
[00:07:07] Maybe women just want to be threatened.
[00:07:11] Maybe they just want to fight if this guy is threatening,
[00:07:16] This guy could snap, but he's chosen not to.
[00:07:22] It's our first late night since the 5 at 40.
[00:07:33] I think I'm going to make a bowl in there.
[00:07:37] Would you consider maybe giving her plans change texts
[00:07:41] and we can hang out with a friend of ours?
[00:08:04] 30 seconds is pretty much all the attention span you have.
[00:08:12] Thanks for telling me the side effects.
[00:08:13] Thanks for telling me the side effects.
[00:08:14] I haven't done cocaine since I don't even
[00:08:20] I haven't done cocaine since the last cabin.
[00:08:35] Take a break from just pounding my pussy so well
[00:08:43] And then I was like, all right, if that's what you want.
[00:08:45] She was just trying to get your dick soft.
[00:09:01] But I can feel that in a couple more minutes
[00:09:10] Saying like, give me five more minutes.
[00:09:23] That's going to be your favorite thing in the world.
[00:09:29] It's a Swiss army knife, but it's about what would that be?
[00:09:42] His name's Victor, which is short Victor for Vinny.
[00:09:46] Just so everyone is at home, just so they know.
[00:09:57] Oh, in this certain episode I think I believe with the former defensive back.
[00:10:02] I think isn't that him right there of the Dallas Cowboys Roy Williams.
[00:10:18] I don't know why that far sounded like Ray Romano.
[00:10:29] When you fart on Mike, that's exactly how you wanted to.
[00:10:33] I'm taking the rest of the episode off.
[00:10:44] There's some rich vein of conversation.
[00:10:54] Women like to walk down the street and feel that at any moment she could be fatally struck
[00:11:06] I think they like true crime because they're in their house not potentially getting murdered
[00:11:12] It's like the rare time they don't worry about it.
[00:11:15] Well, because women don't, they have no sense of community.
[00:11:19] They love hearing about other women being raped and murdered.
[00:11:22] Not all women can afford to have a gun.
[00:11:24] Because they're like, you know, they take someone out of the pool.
[00:11:30] That's why women don't really like sports.
[00:11:33] Now if sports was just like the loser was just woman who had a kill.
[00:11:37] Imagine a football field and there's a hundred women on there and then there's a man with
[00:11:41] a sniper rifle sitting on top, slowly picking all of them off.
[00:11:51] I don't need it until they get to the women they're about as attractive as them.
[00:11:55] And then they're like, this is misogyny.
[00:12:01] You're like, no, don't shoot the one that's really funny and cool and smart.
[00:12:14] She's as beautiful as the women who already killed that I didn't have a problem with
[00:12:18] your killing because they were probably had bad personal hours.
[00:12:24] I get so fired up about the Super Bowl.
[00:12:32] So you think if that were the case, women would love that.
[00:12:39] Yeah, they would be more into football.
[00:12:41] They're just constantly trying to destroy one another.
[00:12:46] I genuinely believe male friendship is a real thing.
[00:12:49] Whereas I don't understand humanity in any context, which is why the only sport that
[00:12:53] I like watching is the Meekham car auction.
[00:13:04] Whoa, these fat Texas guys got little dark Canyon stores.
[00:13:09] I like it because it makes me feel like the three Musketeers, which is one of my favorite
[00:13:15] Yeah, there's a, I mean, I'll eat any candy to be honest with you.
[00:13:20] That's two 300 plus Texan guys that we've decided are in a romantic entanglement with
[00:13:29] They have a way, a woman who calls the shots.
[00:13:33] This seems to be some kind of BDSM out for us.
[00:13:38] No, it's a bunch of, what do you call it?
[00:13:51] Basically what we look for is anything we can fit up a rass.
[00:14:06] It's very funny to have, like if everything's bigger than Texas, your asshole bigger too.
[00:14:09] To have this on in the background and be like, make fun of this, make fun of this, what
[00:14:27] Did you ever hang yourself with the nerds' rope stuff?
[00:14:32] I'm also not going to kill myself, let's be honest.
[00:14:37] You're slowly killing yourself every day with your habits.
[00:14:42] I'm not a drama queen like you who's going to kill yourself in a big, haunted mood.
[00:14:47] Guys, I swear to God, I dignified how enough of this mortal play.
[00:15:01] I've earned my histronics by developing beautiful pieces of art such as, bitch Super Bowl.
[00:15:14] It's like right before every episode starts, we don't say this to the audience, but I'm
[00:15:18] Nick is in his dressing room and he's got a fucking like gatler.
[00:15:26] And we're like, Nick, you're beautiful.
[00:15:34] No, I'm doing the old queen from Paris' burning.
[00:15:37] The one they found a mummy in her apartment.
[00:15:41] Is that the one that gets murdered by us?
[00:15:56] Maybe it's the same person or they have the same name.
[00:16:00] It does sound like a Paris' burning name.
[00:16:08] So it's definitely not one of their names.
[00:16:10] I mean, you know, maybe they're not that creative.
[00:16:17] A little way in the fireman that was a reference to him putting out the fire.
[00:16:22] What would your Paris' burning name be, stop?
[00:16:39] I'm trying to remember the name conventions.
[00:16:46] They come up with the best phrases of all time.
[00:16:53] But the one that's been going around a lot is serving cunt for looking awesome, and that's
[00:17:02] Oh, I thought it's that you look like you're passing as a female.
[00:17:07] I just think it may be, but I think it trickles down into looking...
[00:17:12] Yeah, white women are like, yes, I'm doing that too.
[00:17:20] But the time it's gotten to me, it's been ruined.
[00:17:23] But the first time I saw serving cunt, I smiled so, so big.
[00:17:33] That's the one good thing British people do is they use cunt a lot.
[00:17:39] Yeah, sorry, isn't that called pissing yourself?
[00:17:46] This looks like an app that you hook up to your pussy.
[00:17:50] It's why you go to your iPhone, the other half goes into your pussy.
[00:17:53] And if your phone tells you that you're peeing your pants...
[00:18:01] No, that ad where you need your cell phone is holding you.
[00:18:04] Watching a different ad now, there's a black woman trying to make dinner.
[00:18:07] Make you sit here for her mom and I want to wait.
[00:18:13] Well, you know, living South African, what can you do?
[00:18:40] Yeah, but then like white people came and try to make the sucking cock all about them.
[00:18:47] And you were one of them enthusiastically.
[00:18:49] In fact, that's why your dad chose to move there.
[00:18:52] Yeah, that's why my ancestors in Eastern Europe were like, Five-O, we're not going
[00:18:56] Let's go ahead and re-go to mouth gaffrica.
[00:19:01] Let's just go through Ian's tweets for it.
[00:19:25] You know, this will be awesome because we are re-tweet.
[00:19:26] Okay, to be fair, to be honest, we are pre-recording this one because of some advertising stuff.
[00:19:36] When this episode comes out, this tweet is going to fucking...
[00:19:43] Ian, on 4.42 PM at 1.14.22 tweeted, the gentrified urge to open the third coffee shop on one
[00:19:56] Okay, so if you're at home right now in February, you guys are probably feeling good after Valentine's
[00:20:09] Have you ever noticed that that in gentrified neighborhoods...
[00:20:15] You know, I'm not allowed to talk about it.
[00:20:27] They really do have nothing but I'm going to take the win.
[00:20:39] One anonymous daughter who doesn't want his name shared.
[00:20:41] So anyway, the gentrified urge to open the third coffee shop on one block in Brooklyn.
[00:21:02] I urge to buy high quality Delta 8 gummies.
[00:21:07] How about the getting stoned urge to buy your third pack of Dietsmoke Delta 8 gummies?
[00:21:16] The long urge to have a transplant from weed over the Delta 8 gummies.
[00:21:27] The fucking Swiss Army knife was worth $900.
[00:21:37] You have multiple Swiss Army knives depending on what you plan to do for the day.
[00:21:49] I wonder what tools you would choose, Adam.
[00:21:53] Perhaps a give fill up head screwdriver?
[00:21:59] That's the only tool you've ever used in your life.
[00:22:05] What I would actually, my boyfriend's name is Alan, right?
[00:22:11] Very clever, but what I would do is use both of them every day.
[00:22:34] From our friends over at Delta or at DietSmoke.com.
[00:22:36] And as the other one is a hammer question mark, but I'm gay.
[00:22:49] So I wouldn't even hammer even if I did.
[00:22:55] So you're probably asking what the hell is this?
[00:23:06] You're probably wondering what the hell is Delta eight?
[00:23:17] Adam was Delta eight and he said no thanks.
[00:23:22] Well, he was Delta eight and he put it all the way up his ass.
[00:23:42] There's cards on the television screen.
[00:23:45] You were sort of wondering probably where that was.
[00:23:56] What we're going to talk about is diet smoke.
[00:24:06] The DHC that gives cannabis its popular and desired effects.
[00:24:15] Getting your Gucci crunched up by some fucking woman.
[00:24:19] By weed to be prepared to watch cable all night.
[00:24:26] The THC gives cannabis its popular and desired effects.
[00:24:28] It's technically called Delta nine THC for all of our science fans out there.
[00:24:37] Delta eight THC also natural to the cannabis plant is simply less potent variation than the THC
[00:24:42] because Delta eight derives from the hemp plant.
[00:24:55] Aircraft carrier through that hole to deliver you something that is technically legal.
[00:25:01] And that's not that they use that word in the description is technically.
[00:25:09] So hop in the cab of this aircraft carrier folks because we are going the war.
[00:25:14] We're going to have a war with a being sober.
[00:25:17] What is hemp the term hemp is used to describe cannabis.
[00:25:32] The Star Wars found Star Wars action figures that are worth $9,000.
[00:25:41] The game changing farm bill laid the groundwork for the explosion.
[00:25:45] I remember the hilarity of CBD and Delta eight.
[00:25:47] A few states have banned Delta eight most have not.
[00:25:54] Delta eight produces a similar yet mild effects to regular THC.
[00:26:04] How many gummies should I take if this is your first time using THC start off with half a gummy.
[00:26:09] If this isn't your first rodeo you should be fine starting with a whole gummy.
[00:26:13] It contained up to an hour experience the full effects of diet smokes or start slow.
[00:26:51] I'm not saying what is this super special.
[00:27:08] Well let's just say that this stuff is really awesome.
[00:27:17] Delta eight produces similar milder effects to regular THC.
[00:27:26] They have watermelon and blue bear blue raspberry.
[00:27:33] I'm a customer of this wonderful product.
[00:27:37] And I can say is somebody who's taken regular, plenty of regular marijuana edibles.
[00:27:50] I'm trying to get high but a little less.
[00:27:52] I'm clicking the shop button and I'm clicking either blue raspberry or watermelon.
[00:27:57] So they got something for the girls and the college.
[00:28:01] That's why I stand with my George customer.
[00:28:09] Non-prescription perfectly balanced 100% legal in most states.
[00:28:16] Enjoy with the peace of mind per section 297A from the 2018 founder.
[00:28:25] One of my favorite sections of that bill.
[00:28:30] One of my favorite fucking sections bro.
[00:28:32] Delta 8 Metabol, it's so funny because it's like you use this because you're hopelessly
[00:28:42] It's like a guy with like 90 UIs being like is it okay to have a single load of duels?
[00:28:54] I mean let's not even fuck around here.
[00:28:59] Look as a guy who fucking takes weed in Delta 8 I use them interchange.
[00:29:06] They shipped to all U.S. states where Delta 8 is legal.
[00:29:09] We cannot ship to Alaska, Arizona, Arkansas, California, Colorado, Delaware, Iowa, Idaho,
[00:29:14] Mississippi, Montana, Nebraska, Nevada, Utah.
[00:29:18] So if you're in Maryland, Virginia, West Virginia, North Carolina, South Carolina,
[00:29:23] Florida, Tennessee, Kentucky, Ohio, Illinois, Indiana, Wisconsin, Minnesota, Nebraska.
[00:29:41] Oklahoma, Texas, Washington, New Mexico, Washington, Oregon.
[00:29:54] Wyoming, North Dakota, South Dakota, Hawaii, Alaska.
[00:30:02] And how long will it take for my order to arrive?
[00:30:07] All orders will ship the same day when placed before 2PM.
[00:30:11] 2PM is checking out time at the Delta 8.
[00:30:14] This dice will factor after a long day.
[00:30:20] It's time to go home and enjoy your profit splits as you're paid entirely in Delta 8
[00:30:28] It's time to just mail a bunch of basically edibles to children that can't get them
[00:30:34] The shipping time is listed to check out our estimates, not guaranteed.
[00:30:36] USPS usually takes 2 to 4 days depending on location and time of year.
[00:30:40] So you're going to want to go to Delta 8.
[00:30:43] You're going to want to do this to science.
[00:30:47] Don't lose a fucking minute, motherfuckers.
[00:31:10] The message you're trying to convey is that sometimes you can't or don't always want to
[00:31:20] This is the kind of stuff you want to eat like 9 or 10 of them before going to work as
[00:31:27] Because you don't want to get high on your own supply.
[00:31:31] So you want something else to put you in your own separate supply.
[00:31:40] That's a normal life and has his own apartment where there's a key to use the oven.
[00:31:46] There's a code that gets changed everywhere.
[00:31:55] But when everyone wants to make a dujorno pizza.
[00:32:08] He does not have access to activate the range.
[00:32:16] But everything else in that place, the blinds, the controls for the ceiling fan have added
[00:32:27] Remember product is highly functional THC that comes in the form of a delicious gummy.
[00:32:40] You know what my problem with thatables is?
[00:32:42] They move into the fucking neighborhood.
[00:32:49] Even though you don't even have the urge to open a third coffee shop on the same block.
[00:32:58] It can really be difficult to control, to dose it right.
[00:33:03] There's nothing more sleepy and baked out of your mind when you didn't plan on it.
[00:33:06] That happened to me one time for one of the first times I ever did edibles.
[00:33:13] Remember what means gig at the old prison?
[00:33:25] And I had noticed the first time I ever did edibles, I had no idea how I was going to
[00:33:30] So I only gave myself like, I gave myself like a six hour buffer.
[00:33:38] And when it does kick in, I'm in the fucking fetal position.
[00:33:41] I have to drive an hour and a half to Lorton.
[00:33:51] High on stage, high driving back to Baltimore.
[00:33:53] I stayed at night for like, it was one of the worst moments.
[00:33:57] It was one of the worst 12 hours of my life.
[00:34:00] Boy, do I wish that I had diet smoke at a time like that.
[00:34:05] It's a little bit just a little high driving.
[00:34:14] Let that influence your guys's decision.
[00:34:43] Sucking 500 kilogram worth of big normal.
[00:34:53] No, that's how you spell penis in metric.
[00:34:58] Figure out what the joke is and go with it.
[00:35:02] I thought you were trying to get out of being gay.
[00:35:04] No, he was saying that he does have a small piece.
[00:35:21] Why are you just staring at me silently right now?
[00:35:26] Nick is giving out of the deaths there.
[00:35:33] I thought we were trying to make good on this ad.
[00:35:39] The reason we have to do it is because of you.
[00:35:42] They literally said it was a single you out personally.
[00:35:45] And they weren't trying to be funny either.
[00:36:00] If you don't like me talking on this podcast.
[00:36:03] You can buy a product or you can buy ad time for $5,000 and stipulate that I have to be
[00:36:27] Diet smoke, delta A-T-H-Gum is there not for use for use or sale to people under the age
[00:36:37] So yeah, I'm sure they're checking that real fucking strenuously.
[00:36:49] And I bring this up every time because they call it diet smoke.
[00:36:57] That's fucking, it's the opposite of diet smoke.
[00:37:02] They're low in sugar, fat free and delicious.
[00:37:07] Which I kind of like because they're using real sugar.
[00:37:12] A restaurant or whatever the fuck this.
[00:37:15] Glycolene, go coat their graphene oxide.
[00:37:19] What's the one in the vaccines that everybody's worried about?
[00:37:24] I think that's kind of more the media you consume.
[00:37:41] What is just a gay guy being like, time to beat on?
[00:37:51] I did get in trouble in sixth grade for looking at going to tits.com on the computer lab.
[00:37:58] And let me say it worked for some reason.
[00:38:07] You could have been one of the greatest hackers in history.
[00:38:09] Remember sending people to penisland.com?
[00:38:28] Wood, Bentley, it goes to the other side.
[00:38:32] The best one, obviously, we've definitely talked about this is WhiteHouse.com, right?
[00:38:40] My dumb ass, the immigrant parents, had no fucking idea.
[00:38:43] Oh, you got to check out this other website, Nick.
[00:39:07] Anyway, so yeah, get that fucking diet smoking.
[00:39:14] In case you're wondering, yes, we are in the middle of another episode of Texas Storage
[00:39:21] Casual sex, adult affair dating or sex dating?
[00:39:29] This one is season one, episode one, Texas sold them, which I believe we already watched.
[00:39:40] Would you guys will hear about on Sunday?
[00:39:42] See, these kids with their fucking streaming, they don't remember what it was like to just
[00:40:05] I would love chairs made out of nipples.
[00:40:13] What's the best kind of office chair to get?
[00:40:30] Some dude in Texas found like, I think like a storage thing of.
[00:40:33] So I just got an old vintage tanker chair.
[00:40:37] Yeah, that's the type of desk too, right?
[00:40:52] It looks cool, but it looks like it would be annoying to sit in.
[00:40:55] But you know what it's also annoying to sit in?
[00:41:11] Somebody's rethinking that I'll never kill myself statement.
[00:41:16] No, he's going to sell his chair and get another one.
[00:41:22] You're not going to sell it for $2,000.
[00:41:23] No, I'm not going to sell it for $2,000.
[00:41:29] I'll tell you what you can also get is, is blue chew.
[00:41:33] Blue chew is a type of chair for your penis.
[00:41:36] You ever want your penis to sit in something that makes it hard?
[00:41:46] Is sex with chewable tablets right for you?
[00:41:49] I'd prefer to have sex with a man or a woman.
[00:42:12] It's Nick's second favorite website after gay porn.com.
[00:42:24] Start a little chat with the customer service department.
[00:42:28] Well, you have to ask them if gay guy has to get it.
[00:43:00] And then Snoop Dogg goes to give him his email or whatever and his people around.
[00:43:03] So he's like, you know, because he's like, yeah, let's work on something.
[00:43:15] To reveal the joke, but then ruin the delivery and ruin the joke.
[00:43:20] You couldn't have just sat back when you were was going.
[00:43:23] You're like, you know, it's like supposed to know where it's going.
[00:43:25] It's like somebody's bringing out a birthday cake for a like mentally retarded, terminally
[00:43:33] And there's candles on it and everyone's sort of everyone's holding back the tears because
[00:43:37] they want the kid to think that it's a happy day.
[00:43:40] And Adam walks up, sticks his finger in the fucking thing and he goes, is this chocolate?
[00:43:53] Everyone was wondering whether it's good or not.
[00:43:54] He's email really snoopdog at gmail.com.
[00:43:57] Yeah, he goes, but the room's crowded and he leans in.
[00:44:05] I really didn't have killed you to do that.
[00:44:08] Well, because I'm trying to be a fucking professional here.
[00:44:11] God, this once again, it's not even my joke.
[00:44:27] I spoke to him quite recently, three and a half years ago.
[00:44:32] And he said, yeah, he said, one of my biggest regrets in life is hiring you.
[00:44:43] And the only way you can make it up to me is to make sure Adam never interrupts it.
[00:44:46] Just make sure he do a good delivery of my once new dog show.
[00:45:00] He said he's like, you're a racist, you're a misogynist.
[00:45:08] But the one thing you do have, and I have to admit it, is integrity.
[00:45:18] Please repeat my Snoop Dogg joke on your podcast.
[00:45:28] And certainly don't let him sheepishly use our shared ethnicity.
[00:45:34] To try and justify his fucking up of the joke.
[00:45:58] We're going to lose our sponsorship deal because...
[00:46:24] Your home for made in USA dick chewable.
[00:46:37] It's because they were named by the doctors who took the pills themselves and got their
[00:46:41] dick so hard that their tongues swelled all the time.
[00:46:53] That guy with his own apartment, he says, to dala, fill up the bathtub, all by myself.
[00:46:58] To dala, fill up the bathtub, all by my name.
[00:47:01] Mitchell, make sure we put a key on the bathtub.
[00:47:04] Make sure we put another block on the key on the bathtub.
[00:47:09] I thought it was just a shower in there.
[00:47:11] Maybe we should move them over to wet naps.
[00:47:19] Once again, if you think it's mean-spirited, this is about a scientist that came up with
[00:47:29] Shit, we got the Marcos Pizza at bad days.
[00:47:43] If you want to get mad at people for saying retard, you've got to be dumber than the
[00:47:51] Like, you're like, if you're smarter than me and you're getting mad at me for saying
[00:47:57] That's like the widest person in the world telling a mixed race person not to use the
[00:48:14] You are definitely developmentally disabled in some way in some way, in some way, probably
[00:48:22] Some percent US license medical providers.
[00:48:31] They do actually the founders, but squal a geo geo.
[00:48:36] You pull a Jeffrey to but on it's not no John Schlatter situation.
[00:48:39] We have but the currency is named Jack butterac.
[00:48:45] Or six or nine milligram to dollar fill chewable tablets.
[00:48:50] Personally myself, I go to the nine milligram to dollar fill and I double triple up on them
[00:48:57] I mean, they're not going to like to hear this.
[00:49:05] That's Nick's recommendation is on the company.
[00:49:15] When a box showing up at your house, it says my dick does.
[00:49:20] You're not getting laughed at by the Indian lady that works behind the desk and pharmacy.
[00:49:29] They made this joke already in an advertisement they produce for themselves.
[00:49:49] The blue cheese showing up at the mail and he can't wait.
[00:49:52] I thought it was different and this was advertising the discrete shipping.
[00:49:58] And then I thought this guy was going to beat her to death to get to the mail.
[00:50:07] Are the treatments offered on bluetooth.com FDA approved as part of the fact the chewable
[00:50:12] treatments are have been granted emergency use authorization.
[00:50:20] Finally, while technically are not FDA approved, they have because of the COVID-19 pandemic and
[00:50:27] the desperate need to repopulate the United States of America to wage a ground war on
[00:50:37] We've got by the way, speaking of war, who looks like two new messages.
[00:50:44] The moment please leave us a message with your email address.
[00:50:47] Hey, can you please confirm that you are the patient?
[00:50:52] And so we'll find out shortly if there's a veteran defrauding them.
[00:51:00] You looked up Adam's email and they know he's a customer.
[00:51:07] I probably shouldn't be saying this part.
[00:51:09] I think we're just like, Hello customer service.
[00:51:14] Anyway, guys, here's the, here's the, here's the deal.
[00:51:20] You can just go to hijack Adams and subscription.
[00:51:31] No, it costs nothing and you just pay $5 shipping for your first month.
[00:51:43] It's for canceled Netflix, cancel Hulu, get your dick card.
[00:51:47] It's for patreon accounts on Patreon.com slash comtown.
[00:51:51] Get back into torrenting, jack off to the Netflix shows you don't want to pay for anymore.
[00:51:57] You can pay for your hometown or come town 20, the promo code.
[00:52:06] And you pay just, you just pay the shipping on your first order.
[00:52:10] So you get your first month free $5 your dick gets hard.
[00:52:15] That's all that's, that's, that's the math guys.
[00:52:25] Somebody with the gentrifying urge to open a third coffee shop.
[00:52:42] Yeah, the meme has been the, the urge meme has been going around.
[00:52:46] The urge meme just, just started really picking up started.
[00:52:54] Verification is just kind of that's rich vein to tap into.
[00:53:02] So yeah, remember that guy's coffee shop.
[00:53:04] We're reminding you, please retweet it like Ian's tweet from, from January 14th at 4.42
[00:53:13] PM which says right now as, as of recording, it has two retweets, 27 likes.
[00:53:27] To open the third coffee shop on one block in Brooklyn.
[00:53:32] They're the early likeers at Castro-Holic at Johnny or Rocco.
[00:53:50] So Marco's pizza was actually not really until 2002 wasn't, wasn't a chain, a chain.
[00:53:57] But industry expert Jack Butterrack was a Marco's modern penis.
[00:54:06] I'm a dingo and I live in a fucking pineapple under the sea.
[00:54:27] No, that was the, now of course you would know his name.
[00:54:28] And he's like, oh, I'm also getting a door.
[00:54:33] Filbert was a thinly veiled anti-Semitic trope.
[00:54:49] Well, they're buying national ad time during a storage worth Texas.
[00:54:54] The thing is we haven't opened the single shop yet, but we're trying to get the word
[00:54:59] So we spent $800 million on advertising and now we're out of money.
[00:55:06] So I come to you, the sharks asking for another $800 million so I can pay off the debt to the
[00:55:14] advertisers and open a lemonade stand as to work my way up to opening the first pizza
[00:55:29] You know, you find that place on this story.
[00:55:33] Now that's how you say the punchline at the same time and you have a good time.
[00:56:07] I should just go in the storage facility hustling after this shit fucking but the bottom fall
[00:56:36] Yeah, you see his handshake and all the fucking, you know, I don't think he does.
[00:56:49] Parkinson's is actually the rigidity of your muscles.
[00:56:58] So you're telling me it makes every muscle in your body rigid except your cock.
[00:57:13] I always thought that was a funny name.
[00:57:15] They say, have you been diagnosed with Tardive Dysconesia after exposure to, I can't believe
[00:57:27] I was a country, we were a country crock family in my house.
[00:57:31] Well, that's not, I can't believe it's not butter.
[00:57:42] Landolakes, I think, is what I bought before the, before, before Kerry Gold was everywhere.
[00:57:47] As a, in my family, we, it was called plant butter, which sounds like margarine to me.
[00:57:54] Adam plants his butt cheeks on a man's car.
[00:57:59] He's like, let me just give your cock a smooch with my ass.
[00:58:04] He's trained his asshole to make the sound.
[00:58:06] I think the cock is the one that's being planted in these.
[00:58:15] That is not what the guy's saying there.
[00:58:22] A lot of people say I have a similar vibe to Marilyn Monroe.
[00:58:32] Listen, tonight, if you're in Houston, come see me.
[00:58:38] Then San Francisco, Vancouver, St. Louis, Chicago, Burlington.
[00:58:45] Also, stay tuned for my coming up Q&A, Adam Friedland, tell all tour.
[00:58:51] Speaking tour, a full hour, you can ask any question you want about Adam's life.
[00:59:09] If I find out you're reselling the information later, I will have you killed.
[00:59:19] So go to Stavi.biz slash tour and look, maybe as a late Valentine's Day present, you buy
[00:59:25] your significant other one of my calendars.
[00:59:28] Yeah, and it's February, but there's still 10 more months.
[00:59:31] And also folks, if you're in Boston, you can come see me this weekend at HIDOT Conv.
[00:59:35] I feel like if I released a calendar, I would spend $10,000 to get them all printed.
[00:59:40] And then Joe Biden would be like, we're getting rid of March.
[00:59:54] We got four months now, a month, a year.
[00:59:57] And now I'm going to be president for 15 years.
[01:00:12] He's the only winner in this whole thing.
[01:00:14] All right, well, check out Patreon.com if you want to hear the rest of this story.