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Ep. 310 - Hello speaking

Cum Town | Regular | 05/04/2022

[00:00:00] Okay
[00:00:09] How'd you do that you like a cool rap noise oh I think the mic rubbed against my jeans
[00:00:17] Sick dude, well you're scratching
[00:00:20] Wow, that's real hip-hop
[00:00:34] Pretty cool shit, that's what I get one more in my are we recording yeah, oh shit
[00:00:40] Guys we have a special well you can hear about it on the premium episode of patreon.com slash content
[00:00:47] Well, that's not out yet. I know it's coming out next but if you're listening to this you want to find out
[00:00:52] What the way this we always record the premiums first because we want to get we want to make sure that we you know
[00:00:59] The episode with energy because a lot of people are like man. This show's gotten really bad
[00:01:03] But if you go on patreon.com slash come to it's about as good as it was maybe a year ago or no
[00:01:08] I think it's about the golden era. I think golden age well
[00:01:11] Whatever you personally define the golden era as
[00:01:13] Check out patreon.com slash content if you haven't there's three years
[00:01:19] Or sorry six years worth a premium episodes
[00:01:24] Jesus Christ
[00:01:25] Yeah, I'm 30. I'm we're in our 30s. I just turned 35
[00:01:31] Fuck
[00:01:34] Anyways, you can go back and listen to the the giissant's ever dude the giissant's era
[00:01:40] And you know we're we're young men. We got our whole or whole dicks ahead of us and
[00:01:49] You know three years check it out a lot of episodes on there. That's good. I also want to plug a guy will be in Raleigh
[00:01:56] Coming up if you go to either Twitter
[00:01:59] Slash NYC Guido voice, huh? I think I'm pretty sure
[00:02:03] It was a young lady that manages all that for me now. So I don't even oh you get a woman of color to do it for you
[00:02:09] Yeah, I just I figured I created a job. I got a woman of color managing that's great on my social media
[00:02:15] So I really don't have to do anything all day except read free books on the Kindle. Uh-huh
[00:02:21] That's great. Yeah, which you know people could say you've changed, you know, you're old now
[00:02:27] Yeah, yes, you're 100% correct. Yeah, you're supposed to change you're supposed to change you're supposed to mature
[00:02:34] What the fuck do you want me out here?
[00:02:35] I like I was a 26 skateboarding just fucking hanging out in Bushwick. Yeah, I'm boarding just like getting massive amounts of pussy
[00:02:43] We all remember me cool skater guy. Oh my god. Really cool
[00:02:48] Nick social butterfly just going to parties every night, you know, you have so many friends
[00:02:54] I had I was like just such a cool guy. You're really a man about time dude
[00:03:00] It's really it's like cuz I feel like that's the other thing to everybody. Can we call stuff? Yeah, we will Jesus Christ
[00:03:05] Sorry, I cut you off we're trying you know
[00:03:10] All right, yeah, I'll just call no no you're right. I didn't mean to cut you off you are I didn't mean to cut you off dude
[00:03:16] I don't want a Neil Young situation
[00:03:18] No, no, I respect you
[00:03:21] We will do you're my favorite comedian. We were my best friend. We will absolutely do it your way
[00:03:30] We got a call stop because he's got coronavirus we explained that on the premium episode
[00:03:34] Yeah, but he can't come in
[00:03:37] He's got a quarantine because he is sick with coronavirus. It sounds like shit
[00:03:44] Hello my dick is hard. Yo, sorry. It's a little bit late. We started the episode
[00:03:48] No, I was like going on like I was like literally right in the middle of a good riff
[00:03:51] No, come on dude and Adam's like wait wait. Can we call stop? Well cuz I you know
[00:03:57] I wanted the three of us to be in on it
[00:03:59] How fucking dare you you just you just honestly you just committed the two cardinal sins against me and Nick Nick
[00:04:06] Interrupting is riff me making me do this podcast more than I'm right exactly and the only reason I was riffing
[00:04:12] The literally the only reason is like, you know, I'd be nice to stop if I I can eat up
[00:04:17] They how delighted he'd be to hear that four minutes are gone. You know what I can't you know what I can't wait
[00:04:22] You guys literally right in the middle of it wait a minute
[00:04:25] I said can we call stop? I wanted him to hear this great shit
[00:04:30] Wait, you know, I don't need to hear it. I can say you can catch me up later in fact Adam
[00:04:35] What are you gonna learn? He does the riff without me then we spent another five minutes
[00:04:40] Yeah, he could do the riff again. He could do the riff again, and then we get double the fucking mileage out of it
[00:04:48] It's been five what is it six years? What are you?
[00:04:51] We've been on this thing we've been on this podcast for 15 years you want to talk about your project
[00:04:56] You're starting once this ends shut the fuck up. No, I'm just a minute because I I'm not gonna shit on it
[00:05:02] But it would be funny to riff out how that would go
[00:05:05] So you're gonna shit on no, we're not gonna shit on I mean what do you mean shut up dude?
[00:05:09] You have a thing you want to project of turning his penis into a pussy no, okay?
[00:05:14] All right, he's got it if you want to talk about the project is a bit you guys
[00:05:17] He's got a quote-unquote project is working on okay. If you big project is another podcast
[00:05:23] That's not true to his own day. Triana just doing this and I say what it okay
[00:05:28] Can I say what it is without you making fun of it? Yeah, okay?
[00:05:31] We shouldn't do this at honestly. I'm trying to protect you Adam. Don't do it. Okay, please don't review no no
[00:05:37] No, okay, just give me a chance. Let me elevate our pitch. Okay, you guys are executives at Netflix
[00:05:43] I'm gonna give you my pitch. Okay. Yeah
[00:05:47] After this podcast is over
[00:05:50] My goal is to bridge the divide between the Israelis and Palestinians
[00:05:59] You know what I changed my mind that's a beautiful plan I'm gonna do a show in the Janine refugee camp
[00:06:06] Do you think are you gonna put are you gonna put clown wigs and clown noses on?
[00:06:11] Hell of fighter helicopters as you're as you're shelling
[00:06:17] You're not gonna be on the podcast right what are you talking about?
[00:06:21] You're just gonna produce you're producing it. You're like booking people. You're not actually gonna be on this this podcast
[00:06:27] It's supposed to bring people together. No Nick what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna bomb so hard on both sides of the fence
[00:06:34] That it's gonna bring them together
[00:06:36] They're gonna hate you so much that they're gonna forget their differences
[00:06:39] I don't understand why I wouldn't go exactly how you'd expect is
[00:06:44] That the Israeli army would just use your podcast to blast into Gaza to torture people
[00:06:53] Yeah, instead of death leopard over and over again
[00:06:56] Yeah, it's a movie called zero original jokes
[00:07:10] It starts off with
[00:07:12] What's his name Jason Clark who they they actor in the beginning of zero dark
[00:07:20] I'm just like the cold open is a guy just fucking like waterboarding somebody I
[00:07:24] I only saw it once but my one of my number ones is in that movie Jessica
[00:07:31] What do you mean when you're number you got a really fucking stop?
[00:07:36] You really trying red con your whole fucking life
[00:07:39] Yeah, but ten you've always liked girls that look like Jessica you know
[00:07:42] It's crazy. Why is like we this was this was just this is exactly where the riff was going before he
[00:07:48] No, we're like, can we call stop? It's his miss stop his coronavirus
[00:07:54] I want to hang out with middle-aged guys middle-aged guys retconning themselves
[00:07:59] We're talking about if you get them to use like you just live your whole life as a fucking loser and then you hit
[00:08:05] You get to all them been a loser you get to all be cool and you're like damn. I was cool. I was I was
[00:08:12] Dude shut the fuck up Nick during COVID you got into manga and anime at 35
[00:08:21] And
[00:08:22] And yeah, that sure would be cool. I wish I could I wish I had the attention span
[00:08:26] I wish I had the intellectual capacity to understand attack on Titan
[00:08:31] Now that one's kind of fucking boring the same my roommate showed me that you're a cap the same shit kept happening
[00:08:36] Then he's my problem with anime. There's a 800 fucking episodes and all could be chopped down make it four seasons
[00:08:43] But instead it's like eight fucking it's like 14 seasons. It's all fucking 60 episodes girl
[00:08:49] Man this girl made me watch this girl made me watch it
[00:08:51] She was like she was like if if you don't if you don't like this then like there's like there like this shit ain't happened
[00:08:59] That's a deal breaker. Whoa, she made me watch it and she's like if we watch this first episode
[00:09:05] You don't like if you're not like mine does not blown and then we watch it and it's about like okay
[00:09:10] There's this gay asshole village
[00:09:14] From the world because they're surrounded by giants and a little boy wants to be a soldier
[00:09:19] And then the Giants breach the wall and kill his whole family
[00:09:22] You know and it's like if that is not the most like boring
[00:09:27] Listen I'll here's a thing she saw it's generic generic
[00:09:32] But generic down for that. I'm down for a nice listen. We talked about this actually we will talk about this on Sunday's episode
[00:09:39] Mm-hmm
[00:09:42] I like it. I love revenge revenge is one of my favorite fucking John. Yeah, that's fine
[00:09:47] Yeah, let him become but you're right. It is like the the go-to and it you know plot point of every one of those
[00:09:54] Fuckin like, you know, it's like baby Star Wars. It's you know, whatever the fuck you want to say that's every show
[00:10:01] Yeah, it's just there's no real emotional depth to that
[00:10:04] I mean, it's like it's oh your mom got killed by Giants and now you got it. I'm sure the Giants mean something
[00:10:10] Right, right. There must be some metaphor
[00:10:12] Whatever the but at the surface love you don't you don't respect me enough as a viewer of your shit
[00:10:18] to not like
[00:10:20] Serve me some like, you know sentimental garbage
[00:10:23] You know and here's the other thing I watched a bunch of that show
[00:10:27] It just takes too long like it's like one whole season before they fight a fucking giant
[00:10:32] And you don't any train and the Giants are fucking a year like nude and you don't see their penis
[00:10:37] You don't see their pussy's you don't see the penis. You don't want to fuck the Giants are not like sexy big giant
[00:10:43] Tesses, they're like they got weird fucked up like smiles. Yeah, the only anime I ever liked was the cool devices series
[00:10:49] What's that they're different like it says it's a I think they're unrelated
[00:10:54] But each one like there's like the only overlapping theme is that a woman is raped by you know like a like some kind of like
[00:11:01] Monster blender. Yeah
[00:11:05] Yeah, like a
[00:11:09] Yeah, like a tentacle raping sort of a printer rates are yeah
[00:11:14] I'm a lamp rapes it's a good devices that it's like obviously okay
[00:11:18] That takes that takes the revenge thing to a much further level. You can't relate to being raped by a toaster
[00:11:25] That's also an octopus
[00:11:27] I'd like to watch that and try not to come you know, right of course. I would last 30 seconds
[00:11:34] Here we go. See the og's. We've talked about cool devices. Yeah cool devices is a series of hand-tied pornographic videos released as
[00:11:42] As OVA
[00:11:45] This series consists of 11 mainly unrelated episodes referred to as operations
[00:11:50] And as most noted for its very extreme sexual content most of which centers on BDSM and similar fetish themes
[00:11:57] Wow as well of its high production values
[00:12:02] My I told you guys a story about how my mom because we love Dragon Ball Z obviously and my mom
[00:12:07] Wanted to be cool and bought my brother like rented from the library because that's where we got all our fucking
[00:12:13] This is a this is a poor life hack everyone knows about this. I would hope where you can get free
[00:12:19] Movies from the library public library. You don't have to go to blockbuster. Anyway, my mom would always get us movies and shit
[00:12:26] And she picked up my brother
[00:12:28] What she thought like we watched Dragon Ball Z and then we also watched that I don't know if you guys know running warriors that one was sick
[00:12:33] And then she just got him just it looked like you know
[00:12:36] There's some just look like anime or whatever and it was straight up fucking I don't even know why they had it in the library
[00:12:43] It was straight up and I
[00:12:46] Was like nine years
[00:12:49] Yes, dude and my brother's like nine or ten and he thought he was just gonna watch like, you know
[00:12:54] Some cool fucking you know guy with superpowers or whatever and it's literally like a guy fucking like it's it's not quite
[00:13:02] Beautiful machines or whatever the fuck yours is but it's it's it was like a guy fucking some like young and it's always like
[00:13:09] It's always always child porn. Yes. Yeah, this is this is this is the sample cool devices episode
[00:13:15] This is the kind of anime I'm into operation eight slave warrior Maya one
[00:13:21] The first of a two episode story arc and based on from a manga series of the same name
[00:13:26] So it has a literary underpinning
[00:13:28] This episode begins the story of Maya miss utani and average japanese college student who has transported to an alternate dimension
[00:13:35] And inadvertently fulfills a prophecy
[00:13:38] Maya is transported to another world where she meets two lizard-like creatures who use trickery to convince her to take off all of her clothes
[00:13:46] She's what's it called devices cool devices operation eight slave warrior Maya
[00:13:51] Okay, I'm just gonna do a little research myself
[00:13:52] She's dead lizards trickery to taking off her clothes and she's sold in the slavery the lord est esta lagar
[00:13:59] And is used in experiments to turn her into a sex slave
[00:14:01] She escapes and evades recapture by using a hidden power within herself to slaughter her opponents
[00:14:07] This display of power gets the attention of two warring human and alien factions maria
[00:14:11] Maya's recaptured subjected to more sexual experiments
[00:14:15] Damn they got my bitch Maya back in the zone in the fuck palace and then she's transformed into a hermaphrodite
[00:14:21] No, they give her a cock
[00:14:23] She's trained in her hermaphrodite and then she's transferred transferred into a domino or she's transferred to a domino
[00:14:29] Who was given instructions to break her will and turn her into a sex slave keep in mind?
[00:14:33] She's been now three different iterations of sex slaves
[00:14:36] I'm looking I'm watching this actually on
[00:14:39] on hulu
[00:14:41] Hah
[00:14:42] Hah
[00:14:43] I'm sorry hah
[00:14:44] Oh, you know how netflix they're like stock price drop like 60 percent overnight
[00:14:49] What if they're like we're getting we're getting a password sharing and also we're putting the cool devices series on the main page
[00:14:55] They gotta put a hand time. We're going full
[00:14:59] Dude, she's getting her fucking pussy popped by some guy with iron hands right now
[00:15:03] In captivity, Maya meets another slave laina who is not used for sex
[00:15:07] And then in parentheses until the end of the episode
[00:15:13] Damn, honestly this bitch is kind of good. She's kind of hot. Honestly. I'm looking at watching this a robot
[00:15:18] It's got pussy juice all over his head. I love this. Yeah, so it's a robot that's finger popping her checking her out
[00:15:24] And she's being raped and she's so wet
[00:15:27] Like she's dripping
[00:15:30] She's like stop but her pussy loves it
[00:15:33] They escape but they are quickly called laina is punished through sexual intercourse
[00:15:37] Meanwhile the dominatrix implants a parasitic alien mass into Maya's uterus or her mechanically stretched vagina to lower her inhibitions
[00:15:45] And forces her to copulate with laina
[00:15:49] Dude, they got her they got her hooked up. There's a there's a tube in her pussy and the little liters are like hey
[00:15:55] My bad, we you we just saw that you were a nice piece of pussy pie and we know we could get a
[00:16:00] Uh a nice. They're just like our bag. You were just gonna be expensive and now they're now they're tugging on the on the metal
[00:16:07] That's in her pussy right now. They're just hanging out. They're not even sexually doing it. They're just like oh, this is kind of nice
[00:16:12] This is a nice machine
[00:16:15] Are you trying not to come right now, so you know, I'm really not that aroused by this
[00:16:20] I also did beat off this morning. Maybe three hours ago as soon as I work
[00:16:23] I was very horny this morning. So I did jack off. I was uh, I had a very specific vivid
[00:16:30] uh memory of two different girls I fucked and I was like, you know what? This is cool
[00:16:35] My brain has kind of made this a mashup. I'm just gonna go. Oh, natural. I'm just gonna beat off
[00:16:39] Did you did you text them to ask their permission to jack off to that memory
[00:16:44] To ask for their consent no, but I you know it sounds a little rapey vibes to me
[00:16:51] I'm about to tell i'm actually listen. I'll be texting them as soon as fucking covid. Mike. I get a negative test
[00:16:57] I forgot. I just remembered. I forgot to fucking add cool devices to my letter
[00:17:02] My letterbox
[00:17:05] They have porn on letterbox now
[00:17:07] Um cool devices
[00:17:09] Dude they really are just what I can't add. How's everybody gonna know that I watched a movie
[00:17:16] Dude, what is going on here?
[00:17:17] Everybody's gonna think I didn't like is that i'm not like a cool guy who's seen mad movies if I can't
[00:17:22] I gotta be on it. Yeah, if I can't act cool devices
[00:17:26] Yeah, they're not gonna know you're a sinifiable. Yeah, then dude. This bitch straight up has a sword
[00:17:32] She's slicing these fuckers up dude
[00:17:34] Honestly, she hasn't she got a finger pop by the robot to check her pussy out, but I haven't seen her get fucked fully yet
[00:17:43] So i'm just kind of going through this kind of I know it's a mecca suit
[00:17:48] I know it's a cartoon, but I don't like hearing about women being mistreated like this
[00:17:53] Oh, she's back. They got the they got the thing in her pussy again
[00:18:00] Dude your pain is awesome. What was this made?
[00:18:03] I'm probably like 1996
[00:18:06] Oh no, they got they got things tied up to her fucking tits now too. They she's got the whole thing going. Oh, yeah, I see the car her pussy
[00:18:16] Her clip is growing into a car
[00:18:21] Oh, dude. She's got the power. She's got huge tits
[00:18:24] They're making her tits bigger and they're making her clit kind of honestly not that big of a dick. Honestly, it's kind of like a regular size cock
[00:18:31] You know, it's it's I'm reading a I'm reading. Oh, nevermind. I spoke too soon. The cock is turning huge. I'm sure it's coming now
[00:18:39] I'm sure it didn't turn huge. It just busted
[00:18:43] I'm reading a Japanese person's description of this and it's much better
[00:18:47] Maya is like a combination between she ron prince adam where she starts out as a plain and simple young woman
[00:18:54] Who might still be in her late school years in just in time ready for graduate?
[00:18:58] She eventually becomes
[00:19:00] The most powerful woman in the universe another
[00:19:05] She's Hillary flanking right another pun lmao, which I don't know maybe a tommy or style pun there
[00:19:12] When she finds that mysterious sword she pulled out after getting herself sucked in by a magical portal inside the bad guys castle beats me
[00:19:20] Why the heck it would be locked inside awaiting for the hero while she was held prisoner there
[00:19:25] This is one of those scenes that will continue to confuse us for years to come
[00:19:28] Mmm since we won't know anyways
[00:19:31] Here are some screenshots of Maya's cool transformation does her look scream. She raw he-man or all of our fans out here
[00:19:39] Oh now they got her they got her cock in like a little I'm on episodes. This is a two-parter
[00:19:44] They have her cock in like a little plastic or a little glass device. I think
[00:19:49] shielding it
[00:19:52] Interesting
[00:19:53] And they've turned her nipples and even brighter shade of pink
[00:19:56] Mm-hmm. Oh
[00:19:58] Okay
[00:19:59] Now a woman is fucking her maybe that's why they gave her a cock. They're crazy. There's a woman. This shit was banned in Canada
[00:20:09] This is what drove Jordan Peterson in
[00:20:13] She's like I've been waiting for years for the eighth installment
[00:20:18] What happens to my is pussy and cool devices?
[00:20:22] This is my understanding of the yin-yang symbol
[00:20:24] This is Dow. This is the third way. That's to be great
[00:20:30] Guys, you're gonna want to go to patreon doc. Oh wait her pussy or cock disappeared patreon.com slash comtown to understand the context of that riff
[00:20:38] Yep. Yep for oh now she's eating now though. There's an evil red-haired lady eating Maya's pussy
[00:20:44] Damn she seems to really be enjoying it. Mm-hmm. Oh now her so I don't get what's going on
[00:20:49] I think they're they're they kind of share a cock or they kind of one can take the cock off the other one
[00:20:54] It's kind of like a it's kind of like or maybe when she's in distress
[00:20:58] Her cock appears because right now she's now she's just getting finger pops and getting her pussy
[00:21:03] It's no cock. This is just wait. This is just Japanese schizophrenia. Yeah
[00:21:10] This is what the like a sexless Japanese guy and you develop schizophrenia. This is what your mind
[00:21:16] I'll never forget what we went into that. I just saw a store that said DB
[00:21:19] Oh dude
[00:21:22] Her clit is turning into a cock
[00:21:24] This is awesome while she's getting her clit
[00:21:27] So basically though evil lady is pulling a cock out of her clit
[00:21:33] Wow very interesting stuff. I'm sorry to interrupt. I just want to
[00:21:36] I'll just say when we you know interruption happens sometimes it's not bad
[00:21:40] You know, well, you know if there's a reason if you know if you're watching something if it's time since not the end of the world
[00:21:45] Yeah, it's also too if like uh you do it once in a blue moon and it's not every single day constantly
[00:21:53] Now now he's getting jacked off and getting her tits robbed by a woman
[00:21:59] This is the best show I've ever seen in my life
[00:22:01] Well, I wish I wish girls were like that in real life, huh? I know I wish girls had
[00:22:06] Awesome tits and big juicy cocks. It sounds like the perfect woman
[00:22:11] Oh
[00:22:13] complete anime DVD cool devices one through 11
[00:22:18] On amazon you love box sets $199
[00:22:23] $199. That's a that's a steal in these in this economy
[00:22:27] You fight you take away factor for inflation. This would have been 20 bucks last year. So this is
[00:22:32] This is well folks. This is mullins deal of the century
[00:22:36] So check it out you're going for you're gonna want to make sure you first subscribe to patreon.com slash comtown
[00:22:41] Sign up for that and then with your leftover $200 go to amazon and pick up the complete anime dvd cool devices
[00:22:49] Operations one through exactly and if you have any money left consider purchasing a gun and
[00:22:56] Doing a political assassination of shut supreme core justice samuel elito
[00:23:01] That's something to consider. We're not saying do it, but that'll be bad. I'll write
[00:23:07] What happened consider doing that and we talked about it. It's the problem with us
[00:23:12] Recording out of order, but you know the supreme court. Yeah, we didn't I paid. Hold on. I'm gonna I'm gonna challenge that we didn't actually talk about it
[00:23:18] No, we went deep briefly mentioned it. So now dude. We did it. We did a full legal
[00:23:25] Uh, Adam as we all know
[00:23:27] Was I'm an anti-aportion. Well, I'm saying we could also do that now
[00:23:32] Right. That's true. Yeah, no
[00:23:34] Yeah, so the fucking supreme court did some shit and now you can't get abortions and
[00:23:39] You know
[00:23:40] Or maybe you got it. Oh who's supreme the supreme cunt the supreme cunt the supreme serving cunt
[00:23:49] Which I love is a phrase by the way serving cunt. I didn't get into that last when you mentioned
[00:23:54] You mentioned serving cunt yet on sundays episode adam
[00:23:58] Mm-hmm. Yeah, and I gotta say that's one of my favorite phrases. Oh, yeah, it's oh, yeah
[00:24:05] I believe what it means is that a trans woman is so feminine that she passes as having
[00:24:12] Right. They also say that's fish
[00:24:15] But it's been it's been co-opted to just now you just look good if you serve cunt
[00:24:19] Yeah, now now it's me and the rest of the carons took it
[00:24:23] So you like adam for example if you were wearing like, you know
[00:24:26] beige
[00:24:28] uh like chinos and like uh
[00:24:31] I don't know like some kind of oversized Japanese raincoat
[00:24:35] And uh and a loafers that an old man should wear
[00:24:39] You and your friend you and your friends would be like adam you're serving cunt right now. That's as an example
[00:24:44] That's cunt
[00:24:47] But anyway, uh, yeah, go ahead. You have some thoughts you wanted to say about the matter
[00:24:51] You know, it's fun. I'm looking at this now kumiko nisha hara played slave girl
[00:24:56] My slave order by
[00:24:58] And to be like
[00:25:00] Provin is just she's a japanese voice actress. So this bitch is like in japan you're like you're like hey
[00:25:05] I'm you're like Garfield, you know, right like your bardies
[00:25:10] And then you go and then you take your lunch break and then you're heading back to this
[00:25:14] Office to record six hours of you being raped
[00:25:19] By a mecca lizard
[00:25:21] Okay, I'll take a two okay
[00:25:28] Very good take a three
[00:25:31] Now we want to hear what it sounds like when your clit is turning into a big juicy cock
[00:25:36] Uh more a gooshiku more a gushi
[00:25:41] Yeah, the chef to also put her pussy up to the microphone and make the gushy sound
[00:25:45] Oh, don't make it a more gushy nasty
[00:25:47] Yeah, no, she has to make it real. Mm-hmm. Do you think there's separate pussy?
[00:25:53] Pussy voice actresses. No, they're like pussy. No, they're like Foley artists
[00:25:59] They're like guys that are like uh, yeah, they're like putting their like fingers and mayonnaise
[00:26:04] Yeah, they go to make it sound like gooshy pussy
[00:26:08] They're making mac and cheese. Yeah, they're finding wet leaves the halloween like uh, you know, this was his guts
[00:26:15] Oh, yeah, these are his eyes. They're yep. They're they're peeling grapes
[00:26:22] And stepping on them that would probably sound like gushy pussy slave warrior mia
[00:26:29] Dude, this is so funny
[00:26:31] This bitch is just like she like at the premiere of the simpsons movie
[00:26:38] Watching
[00:26:39] Yeah, bio net worth age dating wiki who she did it. I'm not that voice actress lady
[00:26:47] I'm gonna move you know, you know a woman voices goku in japan
[00:26:51] What that like I guess it's virtuous to have a high-ass pitched voice
[00:26:56] So heroes often sound like bitches
[00:26:59] And evil guys have cool sinister deep voices
[00:27:03] Dan, that's the opposite word is here with a
[00:27:05] The heroes supposed to have a deep voice in the villains a homo
[00:27:10] Yeah, we're going to steal the magic
[00:27:18] Yeah, james adomi has a great bit about how every disney villain is gay. Yeah, I mean, it's it's true every villain of all time is gay
[00:27:27] Pick any that's true. Yeah, the impromptu fag
[00:27:32] Which emperor in the star wars
[00:27:34] True
[00:27:36] Yoda's a fag palpatine seems like he can break children though of all kinds
[00:27:41] Uh, that's the type of gay I guess
[00:27:46] There are some some so somebody's on supporting the don't say gay bill or whatever it is. Mm-hmm
[00:27:54] Um, I you know I support the don't call me gay bill
[00:27:57] I'm more of a libertarian
[00:28:03] You can say whatever you want, but if you call me gay you're going to jail pal you're going to
[00:28:09] That is libertarian action. It's very libertarian of you. You call me gay. Guess what?
[00:28:14] I I'm gonna stand my ground. You're doing a hard time. Yeah
[00:28:17] You call me gay or you make me tell you how old my girlfriend is
[00:28:21] You're gonna have a problem pal
[00:28:23] I think we should give teachers the right to shoot any student that talks about lgbt's q stuff in school
[00:28:30] The teacher should be is that your is that your compromise?
[00:28:33] Yeah, I think teachers should be armed and if a student brings out the teachers aren't allowed to teach that stuff
[00:28:38] But if a student brings it up then she's allowed to in defense of the other children to shoot them
[00:28:44] Yes, you know, if you want to get privately at home you want to groom your children to be lgbtq
[00:28:51] I'm gonna do a cool bit now where I'm like, how many letters like what's the next lgb lg
[00:28:58] Lgbtmo. I'll do bacon lettuce to me
[00:29:05] Home
[00:29:09] That's right
[00:29:10] I remember when those are the only fucking letters that and they you know fucking if you want to do that in the privacy of your home
[00:29:17] I guess what I also have a problem with that but right when I'm complaining about the schools
[00:29:22] I'm gonna pretend it's just the schools. I got a problem
[00:29:27] If you want to be gay in the privacy of your home go for it until we've made
[00:29:32] For right now until this long until this one's done and then and then guess who's coming to knocking
[00:29:39] Guess who's about to stay in their ground in your house
[00:29:42] I'm gonna fucking knock on the door walk in and if you asked me to leave
[00:29:50] Blamma libertarian style. Yeah, or whatever
[00:29:54] Politics now is just killing people you don't like I think that's you want the people you don't like should go to jail
[00:30:00] Or they should be assassinated. There should be a sense you'd be killed
[00:30:02] You shouldn't they shouldn't have a job or any way to
[00:30:05] They shouldn't have health care
[00:30:07] And the people you do like well they better be
[00:30:10] fucking
[00:30:14] They better be on their lgb p's and cute
[00:30:21] Oh, I think I think we have to talk about a fun product. I think you got to suck my dick. You know, what are you to what? Come on?
[00:30:30] I'm not in the room right now. So I can't really gauge it, but I do think next right out of yeah
[00:30:35] We're talking about the ridge wallet and no stop. I didn't say the fridge wallet
[00:30:42] But that would be pretty cool imagine that a wallet with little spaces for
[00:30:47] Yeah, you can have a little fucking diet cooking
[00:30:52] Yeah, it opens it up. Yeah, it's got the little door. There's a light, you know, your money your money is stored kind of laterally on shelves
[00:31:00] It's cold the money's cold too. Yeah, actually, you know what I would I would walk around with that if ridge wallet made a miniature fridge
[00:31:08] Then you could open up a little door and there's a little tiny sodas and like little lunchables in there
[00:31:13] In fact, if they made an entire victorian dollhouse filled with you know stuff and you you know, I would buy that wallet
[00:31:22] Absolutely, I would buy it as well a victorian dollhouse filled with miniatures anim is
[00:31:27] I'm on the website for oh, huh?
[00:31:31] What do you know
[00:31:36] We know you're not
[00:31:37] Unbeknownst to the galaxy paupatine spirit lives on
[00:31:41] He secretly masterminds the first door. I went to I the instinctually went to his Wikipedia page to see if it says that he's gay
[00:31:49] Uh-huh. Oh, I let I let uh
[00:31:52] Uh-huh uh-huh slave warrior might keep going and now it looks like she's sucky
[00:31:56] I can't tell I think she's sucking her own clunk and she can't stop the taste is so delicious to her
[00:32:02] That she's addicted to it. So maybe they gave her a dick
[00:32:05] To train her to suck other top
[00:32:09] Yeah, just just the theory anyway
[00:32:11] Go on. I didn't see I really feel I can't tell I could ruin people because imagine you're jacking off to this all the time
[00:32:16] And you've never had sex at all. Yeah a regular pussy could never do it for you. Yeah, you can't turn it
[00:32:21] Then you're watching just gonna fuck and then it's just none of this is happening. Yeah
[00:32:26] You're like, where's the where's the machine
[00:32:29] Yeah, where's the cool device that takes me to another dimension and gets me like drunk off pussy juice and rips my skin off
[00:32:36] right I will say
[00:32:38] From what I can tell there's not that many machines. I think it's a little bit of a misleading
[00:32:44] title
[00:32:46] Device you got that many devices that any fucked up
[00:32:49] That either here nor there what's what is it? You know, it's a really great device the ridge wall edge wallet
[00:32:55] And there's right entire line of products which includes everyday carry products as well, which sounds like a gun
[00:33:02] But it's not that key cases pens knives phone cases
[00:33:07] They have travel bags commuter packs packable bags weekenders duffles
[00:33:12] Let's not get into the argument again about the backpack stop
[00:33:15] Um
[00:33:17] These are slim about it until you brought it up. These are slim expandable low profile
[00:33:22] This is what the uh the modern gentleman uses
[00:33:26] Not a big fat wallet like your grandfather with a pocket constitution in it. This is minimalist design
[00:33:33] I love it. You can get uh ridge wallet in various uh different formats aluminum titanium carbon fiber
[00:33:41] Premium there's a gold one. I believe
[00:33:43] Right wow we're gonna this featured on that so for 150 dollars
[00:33:50] They have the victorian dollhouse basement floor
[00:33:53] Not on ridge wallet, but so no, this is on ridge wall's website enhance your child's victorian dollhouse with the basement floor extension
[00:34:00] Stairs connect the basement floor to the entrance on the first floor
[00:34:05] Children or adults can continue their imaginative play with additional space for dolls
[00:34:10] furniture and stuff friends
[00:34:12] And you want to check that out ridge wallet calm? I had no idea they were doing so much. Yeah, no
[00:34:18] It's well, it's mainly wallets men's apparel stuff and then uh
[00:34:22] Yeah, it's all house victorian dollhouse for boys. Yeah
[00:34:27] Of course, it's not it's not yeah, it's not just for boys
[00:34:31] I'm gonna move to the bay area and start a start up where it's a victorian dollhouse for boys company
[00:34:37] But the every piece everything in the dollhouse has a canonical address
[00:34:43] So every every dollhouse in the world you can know what other dollhouses are really and I produce nothing but I get
[00:34:51] Hundreds of millions of dollars in VC start up in investor money. Yeah, and then I and then I just take the money and leave
[00:35:00] That's a great idea and then uh and that's
[00:35:03] That's uh, that's how I understand that's what I think hard work means in america
[00:35:10] That's my understanding of being a hard worker that respects the cultures and
[00:35:15] Values and doesn't ask for my student loan repayment
[00:35:19] You know, I took I should have read the contract
[00:35:23] You know exactly that's on me and now it's on me to work hard and pay that money off and I can need to do that by
[00:35:29] By participating in this giant Ponzi scheme
[00:35:34] With my high tech dollhouse for boys plan and you know what that ridge wall dot com
[00:35:42] And I think that's a fucking beautiful
[00:35:45] You go to ridge wall dot com you read that they have over
[00:35:49] 50,000 five star reviews on their website you read each and every one of those
[00:35:53] Make sure that you're ready to go buy an rfid blocking front pocket wallet
[00:35:59] That's right once you've come to a conclusion as a responsible logical consumer
[00:36:05] You check out
[00:36:07] You put in promo code is a promo code
[00:36:10] Yeah, either come town or come town to you put in promo code either come town or come town 20 at checkout
[00:36:16] You can suck me down at ridge wallet dot penis
[00:36:19] Suck Nick down at ridge wallet second go online and suck me down into website
[00:36:26] This is the number one rated wallet in the world
[00:36:30] That's so fucking true is victoria's secrets of us between victoria
[00:36:35] I think it's a bitch named victon and quizzo queen victor which one was one of them
[00:36:40] Never got cock in her life
[00:36:42] Oh is that alisabeth the original Elizabeth? Yeah, that was the original
[00:36:46] Is
[00:36:48] I don't know queen victoria definitely had you know queen victoria is an ugly bitch. Dude. I'm on her Wikipedia right now
[00:36:54] Yeah, she looked like shit
[00:36:56] Well, they all know this they all look so she was cousins with this bitch looks horrific
[00:37:01] She's cousins with czar nicolas and king leopold
[00:37:05] Although all the royals around that time were cousins with each other. Yeah, so that's why queen queen victoria looks
[00:37:11] Like she looks like the penguin she looks like king george
[00:37:14] She looks like danny devito
[00:37:18] With a sharper nose, which has a sharp nose. Yeah. Oh dude ew
[00:37:26] Oh my god, these motherfuckers thought they were better than everyone. That's so funny dude being a king is hysterical. They were better do that palaces
[00:37:34] I know, you know, they look like shit
[00:37:36] If you were a queen you should have be able to fucking we have big titties these fucking sections shirt or you know
[00:37:43] Whatever know how to do affairs of the state. Yeah, that's gotta be one of the other if we had a queen
[00:37:49] I don't think that either one if we had a queen. Oh, maybe she did stop you ever see george five and nicolas the second
[00:37:56] I'm sure you've seen that. I don't think I have look at king george five then look at the czar nicolas the second
[00:38:02] Okay, I'm looking at george the sis is that the guy who quit before oh my god
[00:38:09] Yeah, they're the same guy
[00:38:12] All these motherfuckers. They're all like they're all like brothers and sisters with each other. Yeah, they're german. They just got they all just got
[00:38:18] fucking little kingdoms. Yeah, well that's
[00:38:21] The age of empires ended because all these these motherfuckers made like millions of people died a settle
[00:38:27] They're like petty familial disputes damn. I want to play aj empires
[00:38:31] Dude, it's good. I downloaded it
[00:38:33] You've been playing dude. The covet has turned me into like I've never been a computer guy
[00:38:38] Right. We all know that we didn't have internet since I was a fox like we got internet in my house
[00:38:42] I was like 13 or 12 or it was fucking dial up right so I was really not on the internet heavy
[00:38:49] At any point in my life, but because I had covet and somehow
[00:38:52] George my roommate didn't I've been staying either in the office or in my room
[00:38:57] I don't go to the common areas so I've been doing a lot of like hanging out at the computer
[00:39:02] Bro, I downloaded aj empires. I was getting highest fuck. I was watching movies on the computer
[00:39:07] I was just having lunches here. It was like I get I totally understand and one thing you fat
[00:39:13] You're in that loser lifestyle you want to do on the computer is go to ridgewall.com
[00:39:17] And I was on ridgewall.com for hours on end looking at all the wonderful products and thinking wow
[00:39:23] Once I catch negative for covet and I have places to be and money and credit cards to hold
[00:39:29] I'm putting my shit in a fucking awesome fucking carbon fiber ass ridgewall
[00:39:35] Or something. I'm getting a speckled. I'm getting forged ember an aluminum infused carbon finish
[00:39:41] That's what I'm getting. I'm getting the real tree camo one
[00:39:45] You can't pull that off. Yes. I can dude
[00:39:48] You don't have camo in you. I have like a gummo kind of vibe
[00:39:52] No, you don't you're fucking no you're a piece of shit. No, you're
[00:39:57] No, actually you're you actually a hummo and hummo on like a hum job you hum on my nuts
[00:40:04] Yeah, I never understood why they called giving head a hummer
[00:40:08] Um because it's the cool like the coolest car
[00:40:13] That's not but they get getting your dick sucked existed way before the hummer did I make I make by thousands of years
[00:40:20] I make girls hum when I'm getting sucked
[00:40:23] No, you don't yeah make them hum the the israeli national anthem
[00:40:31] Okay, so go to ridgewell.com promo code comtown or something or maybe there's no promo code
[00:40:35] I don't do you buy but did you say you bought a prostitute on birthright?
[00:40:39] No a russian prostitute. He did he did he did that's so fun. Yes, he didn't go on
[00:40:44] Right. I didn't do go to birthright and you literally did bro. I didn't go on birthright
[00:40:51] Fascist thing you can do is go on birthright. Jesus christ nick you're the piece of shit
[00:40:58] I'm here to support you, but you did go on birthright and if it wasn't technically birthright
[00:41:03] It was something that was basically the thing I went to a strip lip and tell of you
[00:41:08] Did you go didn't you have to take like little classes about how pure and perfect israel was or something
[00:41:13] No, I mean we we had a listen we all wore similar uniforms to the nazi youth and we
[00:41:20] marches every morning
[00:41:23] But it's not the same thing we all wore khaki short shorts and khaki shirts and
[00:41:30] Did goose stepping or whatever it's good anyways going on birthright. It's gotta be one of the fascist things you can do
[00:41:36] Yeah, absolutely do that. Oh my god, bro. Do that and then be like, oh, this isn't enough. I gotta buy a sex slave
[00:41:42] Also, I didn't do that. I
[00:41:45] I've talked about this on the show before I went to a strip club in Tel Aviv when I was 18 years old
[00:41:51] Why were you in israel adam?
[00:41:53] To get pussy because regular girls weren't gonna fuck me
[00:41:56] But why did you go to israel because I did a gap year in israel i've talked about this at great length
[00:42:02] Will you make me defend being no, but you're over here?
[00:42:05] Wow, I didn't have the right opinions when I was 18 years old. Hold on so hold on you
[00:42:10] You want to attack you first of all you want to excuse that
[00:42:13] But then in the same breath turn around and say the people are responsible for their student loans and they should have understood the contracts
[00:42:18] What no just to be clear
[00:42:21] I
[00:42:22] You didn't go to college you went on a whole rant. I
[00:42:26] Graduated I graduated with $70,000 in debt and you went on a whole rant about how you worked very hard on calm down to pay
[00:42:33] And everyone should have to work even harder than you. Yes, that's not true. That's not true
[00:42:38] You say that all the time anytime it comes up and we're all hanging out with our friends that have debt
[00:42:42] You say it's peep. I didn't work this hard
[00:42:45] Being the third guy on the podcast listen to see other people get their fucking
[00:42:50] Just like that. I would know we're on the golf course. I was there because one of the retarded children I take care of
[00:42:58] Works there and I had to bring the work as a caddy you were there
[00:43:03] Yeah, you were there putting cigarettes out on one of the other retarded
[00:43:06] one of the other retarded caddy you gave you the three iron instead of the yeah, but with your friends eric prince and
[00:43:13] Jared Kushner Jared Kushner. Thank you for reminding me of your friends
[00:43:20] Well, they're my friends and you said you said I think this afternoon. I'll shall get myself a palestinian sex slave
[00:43:29] And then after I'm going to purchase some student loan debt
[00:43:33] And instead of forgiving it, I'm going to pursue it with extreme prejudice
[00:43:41] And use your off my voice
[00:43:50] I believe I will purchase some black medical debt and pursue it with extreme prejudice
[00:43:58] Listen I
[00:44:00] I believe this afternoon. I shall enjoy myself the fine sweetness. So much
[00:44:09] Like a sweet summer berry
[00:44:13] Black medical
[00:44:17] The profits
[00:44:19] The profits of black chemotherapy
[00:44:23] Listen, I've said this before and I'm not embarrassed to say it
[00:44:26] I was I was heavily invested
[00:44:30] COVID I was heavily lightheaded
[00:44:35] Well, I'm glad you're feeling better. Oh, I was I was heavily invested
[00:44:43] As a as a bar mitzvah gift my grandfather gave me
[00:44:48] an incredibly I guess it amounts to 1 to 2% of the mobile home industry in this country
[00:44:58] And then because you did such a good job reading the Torah and then when Bernie ran against Hillary
[00:45:04] I realized that it wouldn't get me. I couldn't get pussy unless I sold it. So
[00:45:09] Right, right because you don't want to be a landlord
[00:45:12] Life is a highway, man. You got it. You can't you listen
[00:45:16] I you can't be like don't flip flop. You know, you got to learn you gotta learn you gotta learn man
[00:45:22] You gotta fucking learn. Yes. Yes. I was a
[00:45:26] Zionist
[00:45:28] Hitler youth as a child
[00:45:30] Yes, and look what's important is that you guys go to rid you all dot com and also
[00:45:34] What's also important is that you come out and see me and my friends do stand up comedy
[00:45:38] My dates coming up here for the end of this tour
[00:45:41] Washington DC next week all shows are sold out, but we're trying to add maybe a Thursday or a Sunday show
[00:45:47] Then I'm going to be in San Diego. We just added another Thursday all the shows are sold out
[00:45:52] um and then
[00:45:55] Philadelphia
[00:45:57] Oh, and then of course the the fucking
[00:46:00] Uh, fuck I have to add this to my calendar. I remember when it is
[00:46:03] But I'm at providence. I'm at the comedy connection because I couldn't go due to having coronavirus
[00:46:09] So I will be there
[00:46:11] In providence all ticket. It was sold out
[00:46:15] All tickets is rescheduled from this weekend. It's now. It's going to be on
[00:46:19] uh, June 9th through the 12th
[00:46:22] And then I'm gonna be in Philadelphia
[00:46:24] June 16th to the 18th and much more importantly go to my youtube channel
[00:46:28] Stavros halchias stave baby
[00:46:30] Um, I will be releasing my special. It's very close the editor is taking forever
[00:46:35] I want to fucking shoot this guy with a gun, but we're so close
[00:46:38] Uh, I think I don't want to give a date yet, but I'm pretty positive it will be the last
[00:46:45] One of the last two weekends in may cross your fingers subscribe to the youtube channel. It's coming out on youtube
[00:46:50] I just want people to see it. That's that those are my plugs fellas. Where are you gonna be guys?
[00:46:55] I believe you're in boston this weekend. I'm in boston this weekend. I'm in rali in
[00:47:00] may and then portland and then
[00:47:04] carolones on broadway and then shiake
[00:47:06] I'm gonna heal him and i'll be in chicago. I think i'm now i'm adding buffalo with the beginning of july
[00:47:11] Then chicago then after that i'll be in the inapolis and then I love it phoenix. Yeah, so this is gonna be a busy summer
[00:47:17] I'll be all over the road dog the mold dog road dog
[00:47:21] And guys next I swear to god we've been having some supply chain issues, but next week I will be dropping
[00:47:28] my uh, my my fashion line my merchandise
[00:47:31] Second of all i'm announcing west coast dates in the next couple of weeks and uh, also if you're in the new york city area
[00:47:39] We have funny mums every monday except for the first monday of the month that come on everybody at apm
[00:47:44] They've been great recently
[00:47:46] Um, so come get sucked as stuff rose would say
[00:47:50] Dick sucks get your little dick sucked
[00:47:55] What else
[00:47:57] Uh, do we have another reader just one read for this one? There was there was just one for this one just oh, that's a real shame
[00:48:04] Because we really we would have been gliding to the end our sponsors have a well, but hold on
[00:48:09] That would do you have to understand that just because there was one read means we did it in 30 minutes
[00:48:16] Oh church church so
[00:48:18] Truth be told we got 10 more minutes
[00:48:21] That's huge. Yes, really big
[00:48:23] Uh, anyway, that's awesome. Where were we so adam on the golf course
[00:48:29] and he's
[00:48:32] He's wearing he's wearing this
[00:48:34] The severed hands of african children his shoes
[00:48:39] Yeah, he has them he has the rigomordis so they're like claw shapes so they make him
[00:48:44] But he's standing at about five ten with these platforms
[00:48:47] I was using them kind of his high heels. He's using him as high heels. He's wearing this
[00:48:53] Sort of african hand high heels
[00:48:56] One of the I've never seen those shoes. They're so evil and despicable. They are they're like so one of the first
[00:49:02] In is like a limp. This is not a front. This is why behind that imagine a hand like setting up to shoot a pool cue
[00:49:08] Yes, yes
[00:49:09] They're sewn together to create sort of the sinister kind of
[00:49:13] Gave a different way gay
[00:49:27] Then there's two the strap on the top is two hands doing like the shy emoji finger touching
[00:49:33] Yes, that's how it claps
[00:49:39] Seven is four each shoe is four severed hands off african children with french manicure you're saying this is in minecraft
[00:49:48] This is this is parody. No, this is not Adam on dodge golf course is not true
[00:49:53] They retarded adult that I take care of out of the goodness of my heart works
[00:49:58] Yeah, you're slave your slave. How's he my slave? It doesn't do it. You don't pay him
[00:50:02] He's no, I don't know what he do. I don't want him to do what I try now
[00:50:06] He fills your heart with laughter and love no I do that myself
[00:50:10] No, you he gives you a lot of love if there's anything if there's anything
[00:50:15] Whatever you want a treaver you can say what anything you want about me
[00:50:19] But one thing that is 100% true that everyone will agree with I can say a lot about you filled with laughter in love
[00:50:26] I bring joy to the world
[00:50:28] Weekly on this show by right at by weekly because we got it's a hard world out there and guys like me
[00:50:35] Are the reason that retards like that can get to their job at the trump golf course where you
[00:50:43] Prance around in your gay little slave hand shoes, right? Right? Right? Yes, sir
[00:50:48] And and talk about buying a black medical debt
[00:50:52] For fun
[00:50:53] Because it reminds you of a summer boys and berry. Yeah dripping with the juices dripping down
[00:50:59] No, it's bad that you know you'll never collect on it
[00:51:01] But the idea of desperate black people owing you something and you having power over them just delights you to so I just do it
[00:51:08] So I've worth buying no I do it so I feel more comfortable listening to hip-hop music
[00:51:15] Makes sense name one name one hip-hop song
[00:51:18] um the real slum shady I'm in them
[00:51:20] Okay, name another one um I
[00:51:26] Eminem
[00:51:30] Shit pretty fly for a Jedi
[00:51:34] Come on we say you have to all you had to do was name M&M songs
[00:51:39] Or take it you know, you don't even have to
[00:51:42] You don't even have to like have a diversity in there because you could have gone a much funnier direction
[00:51:46] I was that as it continues eventually. Okay, give me another fucking like angle bird humper danker
[00:51:54] Give me another chance. It's over man. No, it's too late
[00:51:58] It's too late time to recover by buying up more black medical debt. I will
[00:52:02] Now guys, you know one thing that is and look I gotta say I'm having a great time over the phone
[00:52:07] And I think I think fans of the show will be horrified to figure out there's a new way that we figured out to literally phone the episodes in
[00:52:15] And I'm having a great time with this. I think I think the next thing is we we got to get two of us on the phone and one of us
[00:52:24] With the real one and then eventually all three of us. We're just recording. Yeah, uh phone call at some point
[00:52:30] Well, what we should do is what we should do is here's how this here's how the show ends
[00:52:34] Is you have to know more free episodes?
[00:52:36] You got to sign up for the patreon and then when you sign up for the patreon all you get is a lottery ticket every week
[00:52:42] If you're the winner then we will call you if you answer shows over
[00:52:49] If you don't answer, we'll leave a we leave a one hour voicemail
[00:52:55] Just for you and that's a special episode
[00:52:59] And you can choose to upload that if you want it. Yeah
[00:53:03] No, you can't
[00:53:06] Yeah
[00:53:08] If you even dare dmca lbtq how many goddamn letters these folks?
[00:53:12] How many fucking letters these motherfuckers need man. I
[00:53:16] One what's next?
[00:53:18] Dd
[00:53:29] What I was going to say though is one problem with us being
[00:53:33] A separated by distance is that we haven't we didn't get a chance to talk about what we were going to have for lunch
[00:53:40] Yeah, that's and you guys already ate lunch. I would love if you
[00:53:44] Think in small ball here because what we can now do is have three separate conversations about our different lunch choices
[00:53:52] What do you know? We don't have to agree on anything. So stop yet oatmeal earlier. What do you think?
[00:53:57] I had a meal for breakfast. I'm thinking sushi something fresh
[00:54:00] Something like fresh fish
[00:54:02] Maybe a three lunch maybe a three roll combo. You know, that's a classic. Oh mucky roll
[00:54:07] One of the classic lunches that there are I love the problem is my favorite spot in the story and I won't say the name
[00:54:16] Uh, they don't do a three roll combo. They do like a little box set, but it's like, you know man the bento
[00:54:21] I really kind of want bento. I want three. I want three rolls
[00:54:25] So I might just have to I might just have to bite the bullet and just pay full price for the rolls
[00:54:29] Yeah, get them all a cart. Yeah, I think I might be done with with Japanese food. I feel like I just kind of like
[00:54:35] No, don't say that. I haven't had really good Japanese food and like forever
[00:54:41] Because sometimes once you have really good Japanese, you know what I if I
[00:54:45] I really the only place in New York. I need can eat is date that they go hand roll place
[00:54:50] In the Fulton market. Yeah, the decal market that place is good
[00:54:54] You think once you do some west coast dates, there's such good fucking sushi over there
[00:54:58] Yeah, you do some Seattle even that way has incredible sushi like you just got to get out more pallet's good good railroads too
[00:55:06] They have good railroads. Yeah, they have a great ball mass burritos too
[00:55:10] Dankas burritos vancouver had some great sushi and vancouver while i was out there
[00:55:15] Um
[00:55:17] Trains really have a fraught history
[00:55:20] What do you mean that is true? They've had a wild rebrand in the last 10 years of being like no, we're just for our autistic people
[00:55:25] Yeah, it's really really really trains. Yeah, that's your thing is autistic people. That's that's the rare PR campaign juice of lost
[00:55:34] There's trains have been rehabilitated. Yeah, I can't I fucking I can't stand this shit. You know what really pisses me off
[00:55:43] Somehow somehow in the last 15 years, I could literally became okay to just be a nazi
[00:55:48] Like that would be a thing people are accused of and then before I maybe it's died down a bit
[00:55:52] Believing up to trouble you could be like yeah, I'm a fascist nazi and then people would be able to be like well
[00:55:58] He's got different opinions
[00:56:00] You know, it's like I don't want to ruin my family over politics, but
[00:56:05] but
[00:56:06] But for whatever reason just hitlers mustache
[00:56:10] Cannot be rehabilitated. It's a fucking yeah
[00:56:13] It's a must-est that many people have had which honestly just for as a matter of convenience
[00:56:17] I would like to have myself. I feel like I would look good with a hitler mustache absent the fucking you know the
[00:56:24] connotations that it implies
[00:56:28] Charlie Chaplin why can't we say it's a Charlie Chaplin dude. I'd look slick
[00:56:33] I'd look good and you know
[00:56:35] I actually I don't want to I don't want to step on that. I don't want to you know, obviously
[00:56:39] I'm not accusing you of anything. No Adam re here, but I have a bit about how Adam re it's crazy
[00:56:45] It's crazy that
[00:56:48] Neo nachis won't wear a Hitler mustache, but they'll just put a swastika on their forehead
[00:56:53] That's that's sort of the I haven't seen that bit. Mm-hmm. I'm not accusing you of anything
[00:56:58] I'm just letting you know
[00:57:00] I don't want you to think I
[00:57:03] If I post it or I do it on stage, I don't want you to think no that sounds that sounds different to me too. Okay, okay
[00:57:10] Just letting you know well, I'm glad you I'm just saying
[00:57:13] Well, hold on
[00:57:15] Stop both have a clear track record of writing our own jokes
[00:57:20] We can agree on a moment of parallel thinking
[00:57:23] What is on it quite honestly if you're somebody that is looking at the world and you're you're mostly thinking what can I get out of it?
[00:57:29] If you're a deep thinker if I can't uh, then see you're just gonna try and take shots
[00:57:34] What a little shot taking you fucking pieces you're gonna have to
[00:57:37] I have to make a couple of phone calls and blue cross blue shield and say give me your tikisha files
[00:57:44] You know, I don't have hope to
[00:57:45] I know yeah, I need to do a lot of the lot of your uh for lack of a better word victims
[00:58:01] He searched
[00:58:03] I tried to be I tried to be generous. Yeah, I appreciate the effort
[00:58:10] You're a good guy. Do you try to do it? Yeah, I'm thinking salmon. I'm a cotter roll. I'm thinking spicy tuna roll
[00:58:15] I'm thinking white tuna roll and then maybe a little sweet potato roll wild card nice
[00:58:21] You know what I would like I would think about this the other day
[00:58:25] You know asushi rice see you eat on the outside in the middle a little piece of uh pumpkin pie
[00:58:30] Mm-hmm. It's a mrissey's piece. Well, that'd be nice. Oh, that's your kind of sushi and it's yeah spooky Japanese. That'd be cool. Yeah
[00:58:37] Yeah, I like that a lot sushi from hell
[00:58:40] That's fucking awesome risea's cup is kind of kind of a sushi to some extent
[00:58:46] The peanut butter is the fish and the chocolate is the rice. Yeah
[00:58:50] Okay, if you can imagine it
[00:58:52] You know, I dream to imagine every day. I know that's something that you would like
[00:58:56] You know, I love you know, I love that dude. I kind of got a hankering for a halloween candy now
[00:59:02] I like referring to all candies hall halloween can it just means eating too much candy. Yeah, right?
[00:59:07] You know, well, you're wearing a look you're wearing a gimp mask
[00:59:11] Implies fun to
[00:59:14] Right, that's nice is that's what you can see you can click at the candy and you're not mad because it's smaller than your penis
[00:59:20] Yeah, yeah
[00:59:21] You think you got a Snickers you think I got a Snickers. It's got a little dick vane
[00:59:25] But you think it king size you feel really bad about it. It is true
[00:59:29] It's halloween if it's halloween candy you can enjoy it and you can say ha ha my dick is bigger than you candy bar
[00:59:35] Yeah, Snickers does have like a vascular cock vibe about it. Absolutely. I haven't considered that you have no
[00:59:43] Subconch, yeah, I never thought about the dick vane
[00:59:45] But I do like that they got like tread marks on the bottom as a kid. I always pretended I was eating a tie like a tire
[00:59:50] Yeah, it's cool. I was like and then I'd see cars and I'd be like damn. I want to eat that tire
[00:59:58] That's what I think anyways folks patreon.com slash comtown check out the you know, whatever the rest of this or the beginning
[01:00:07] I gotta say I love doing this college
[01:00:09] Yeah, fun
[01:00:11] I'm thinking we're gonna just you know, maybe switch to maybe half Collins
[01:00:15] I don't see you know, we'll see we'll see because the audio quality sounds about the same
[01:00:21] It's easier. It's easier to pay attention when it's like because you know, it's supposed to be consumed in an audio only format
[01:00:27] We're hanging out in person. It's very easy to just say and do nothing. No, I get lost in sappers eyes when it's a phone call
[01:00:34] It's like yeah, you gotta be you know, it's the phone
[01:00:37] Honestly, I'm paying way more attention me too than I then I would be in person
[01:00:41] So something to think about maybe you know when I'm on the road, maybe we do this instead of fucking banking eight episodes next week
[01:00:47] Maybe we bank six and save two for ourselves. Yeah, we'll do that and then also too
[01:00:52] The final stage is instead of Adam being here or on the phone. We just have him write letters and we read Adams letters in the show
[01:01:02] Adam can write a letter and we can read Adams letter throughout the show. Oh, that'd be nice. That's a great idea
[01:01:07] Yeah, if you look I'm even I'm even I'm willing to you know, maybe I can get a well, who knows?
[01:01:12] It looks like a crazy. I was gonna say maybe get a better microphone. I'm not doing that
[01:01:16] No, honestly, honestly, I'm great
[01:01:18] I'll tell you what there's no reason to because the better microphone the bottleneck is the like production once once this goes into like
[01:01:27] You know like an editing software something that I'm supposed to know how to use which I never will
[01:01:31] I see right and you know what in the past when I cared more people like just fucking hire somebody to do it
[01:01:37] I did and it was just as bad and people complain so
[01:01:42] Right. Yeah, there's no reason to buy something nice what might be what would be good is
[01:01:48] Either another board or maybe like, you know, yes, oh way where if I'm now I see that. Yes
[01:01:55] Omerboat or you know vice versa or something, you know, I love that another board is a great idea
[01:02:01] I have a board on my computer if I'm doing it from home actually
[01:02:04] Yeah, um, you know this setup is super easy. You just plugged the phone directly into the board
[01:02:09] I don't know why we didn't do this before. This is a good way to have guests too. Yeah, this is a great way to have
[01:02:14] What didn't we do with that one guy who publishes a bunch of game books? Oh, yeah douglas brain
[01:02:20] Douglas giving me brain a dicless brain. I think
[01:02:23] Is
[01:02:27] Yeah
[01:02:30] Yeah, I think that guy's dicless dicless brain
[01:02:34] Uh
[01:02:35] Yeah, what was that book he was even trying to promote about I can't remember? I remember there's a cool guy. I don't fucking
[01:02:41] cares late capital is a
[01:02:45] God damn shit dicless brain you're always welcome back on the show people go to
[01:02:49] Zero books calm check out their latest. I'm sure it's something about it
[01:02:53] You know some chinese lady saying that we need health care
[01:02:57] That's cool. I agree with that chinese lady. Yeah, I agree with it too, but I don't need to read a god damn book about it
[01:03:03] I already know that I don't understand. Yeah, I don't understand. I don't get the idea where you're supposed to sit around reading books of opinions
[01:03:09] You already have
[01:03:11] Yeah, I got the opinion chief. Yeah, I'm good. Yeah. No, I'm gonna go play age of empires in order
[01:03:16] Like most brooklyn podcasters. I I decided to be a socialist once I saw how much money chappa was making
[01:03:25] I started my own podcast. It's the same thing. I became much much
[01:03:30] Dear less informed I became a shittier comic. I forgot why I even moved to new york
[01:03:35] I decided that the reason that happened is because I'm better than all the other comedians
[01:03:39] I'm actually better than them anybody anybody that's successful is successful
[01:03:47] Not because of their talent because they're just at all because they're chuds and they're pandering chud grifters
[01:03:52] Even though i'm me
[01:03:54] Who did not vote until 2018 and never cared at all in their entire lives?
[01:03:59] I'm the one i'm persecuted
[01:04:01] You can get to check me out. I'll be on tour with with all right all right all right all right
[01:04:08] All right, thanks a lot guys. All right, I have to pee