Cum Town | Regular | 01/05/2017
[00:00:00] but i don't know i'm gay i'm gay i'm gay i'm gay i'm gay i'm gay i'm gay i'm gay i'm
[00:00:17] doing a quick level check here hell yes we started podcast and then brandon and
[00:00:23] adam both left the room immediately pieces of shit i don't even know there's only one
[00:00:26] bathrooms i don't know why they both had to get up i think brandon is sucking off at him
[00:00:30] yeah bathroom what are you doing in my kitchen brandon uh i have a little penis probably because
[00:00:38] i'm gay oh dray-dle dray-dle dray-dle dray-dle i sucked you because i'm gay i felt like my mom
[00:00:45] and dad i have a little penis that's the beauty of uh hanaka i said if you miss the chance to do
[00:00:53] the christmas album we can do a full hanaka have eight more days eight days eight tracks
[00:00:59] that's like uh oh shoot the cats are about to fight hopefully they will and kill each other uh
[00:01:07] are there any more of them like the customs eight eight days eight tracks it'd be like a good
[00:01:10] like ten new jint tour hell yeah dude mm-hmm ten new jint the sex with underage
[00:01:16] filipinos tour does he do that he did he had like a fucking i think his wife was like fucking
[00:01:21] and he married like a fourteen-year-old like some kind of exotic asian well i i don't believe in
[00:01:27] the government telling him what to do uh is that libertarian to be a pedophile yeah it is yeah
[00:01:34] yeah it's the it's the most libertarian thing you can do it so keep the government out of my
[00:01:40] bedroom you know what i mean i'm trying to fuck beautiful malaysian children and i'm not trying
[00:01:46] to pay taxes i'm not paying tags on these little baby condoms i put on them and suck them off
[00:01:52] i want those shits for free um i believe in small government but like small child
[00:02:00] small government penises little ass kids do you think people suck off little kids and get any
[00:02:06] enjoyment out of that uh don't they yeah don't they fuck what are you talking about doing it for
[00:02:11] work no but you think petaphone i don't want to suck off this kid but i will i have to but a
[00:02:19] little kids dick doesn't even get hard that yeah it does i mean it gets like that no i i think it's
[00:02:24] it gets hard but you don't it doesn't we can't come don't you remember remember
[00:02:28] remember jay is coming out of it right yeah right right those were kind of the best but what do you
[00:02:34] remember it for the sport before i could come i remember you'd come i would come soft well i don't
[00:02:40] know if it's i don't know if it was necessarily an erection but i remember it like my preschool
[00:02:44] graduation hell yeah i like had this there was this teacher that i was so i was like so into and i
[00:02:49] kept like moving my legs i kept like moving my legs like on stage because i was like looking at it
[00:02:55] like i was like trying you're just beating off with your legs but yeah i don't know if it was just like
[00:02:59] if my dick like just felt funny or like had like a pre-p best interaction no you wanted to fuck your
[00:03:04] your teacher dude yeah um i think anyway yeah i think we've discussed kids little kids penises
[00:03:12] nake is sitting at a desk for everyone home yeah this is a new com town nake has a laptop and a desk
[00:03:18] yeah well the desk was already here and i already had the laptop we just have more space in the living
[00:03:23] room the desk has been cleared off so i'm trying to sing where i'm a producer now
[00:03:28] so this is the booth i can keep an eye on the levels and stuff and uh i don't have to contribute
[00:03:32] anything well we can talk about little i'm i made a smoothie and i don't do i need a straw
[00:03:39] i just chug my shit straight out the blem it's too there's too much it's too frothy what did you
[00:03:44] put in there dude ginger apples lemon look at this look how it's a long stroke thick in the car yeah
[00:03:51] i don't like that dude that's a bad combo i go kale spinach tomatoes carrots apple how much
[00:03:57] how much do water do you put in there i put a nice amount of almond milk in there yeah put all
[00:04:01] my mouth i put a wall i put a cup of water and some orange juice come on i don't have almond milk
[00:04:07] get some almond milk i'm gonna make my own with the Vitamix no you can only make almond butter with
[00:04:11] it you can make almond milk with it i don't think so you're really excited about the the Vitamix
[00:04:16] and the group text yeah Vitamix is good dude yeah that's that good shit i'm leaving i'm gonna
[00:04:22] you man since that Vitamix dude i had a surprise these just almost fucking assaulted Brandon
[00:04:29] what if they fucked Brandon's face up what if the cats fucked Brandon's face up i wouldn't call the
[00:04:33] hospital that's libertarian too you can't have a hospital they're gonna throw a hospital like
[00:04:42] maybe you're the problem what's that maybe some about your friend is your friend is cats
[00:04:48] you're so beta that the cats get i'm like the opposite of the cat whisper where like
[00:04:52] cats just like fucking cuck me yeah well i see cuck you got my cats in the garage
[00:05:03] yeah hell yeah dude we're maryin what's the so uh fucking i fucking hate go to the post office
[00:05:11] why don't we get what what does he say for adam and eve dot com i fucking hate having sex hey
[00:05:17] that's why i get dildos to shove in my ass you know listen brock obama thank you for doing
[00:05:26] the show but i gotta get something off my fucking chest he cut off the the obama interview to
[00:05:34] plug dildos you're just like uh i'm sorry mr president put that in your ass
[00:05:41] pow i just shit my pants can i make for coming on the show president obama can i make coffee in
[00:05:47] the Vitamix i don't think so what if you you put the whole beans in there you grind them up then
[00:05:53] you put water in then you put it on soup soup and then it's the entire process yeah but then the
[00:05:58] beat you wouldn't feel to be able to filter out the beans unless you poured all of it into a coffee
[00:06:04] filter just drink the motherfucking bean yes you just do it yeah then you do a pour over on top of
[00:06:09] it yeah you pour it over the cup that's not a bit of oil what's that no it doesn't boil
[00:06:16] it'll boil it'll boil it'll get hot as shit dude how does it do that it's just
[00:06:20] so fast the kinetic energy exactly dude so fucking fast yeah don't lean that damn
[00:06:25] my tv please don't lean it again fucking shit off my tv
[00:06:28] there whoo yo damn it you immediately come over and fuck up my purchases
[00:06:38] the disrespect my expenditures you're taking roll it now seriously just look at me right now
[00:06:45] look at the amount of money i've wasted i surrounded myself with what is this like two
[00:06:50] thousand dollars this is a five hundred dollar blender i'm gonna be on the fucking deck of the
[00:07:01] starship enterprise yeah yeah you're gizbo i'm gonna skype myself into the show from that
[00:07:06] that uh titanic remake that they made that india made did you see that no some not india but some
[00:07:12] indian country and i know that sounds racist how's that what you know that you know what i mean
[00:07:17] a country that's you know it's not india but it's it's india self-sirielanca
[00:07:21] yo i love how much these cats disrespect brandon get on this chair and shit on my face well one of
[00:07:26] these countries they like they're like we have to make another tatani and they like remade they
[00:07:32] made it like completely to spec they remade the titanic wait oh the yeah oh it's like launching
[00:07:38] next year what yeah well i mean i guess they'll have fucking but you gotta you gotta imagine
[00:07:44] because like that movie has to do really well internationally because it's such like a bullshit
[00:07:48] accessible story right and this you know it's not like a great script so it translates easy right
[00:07:54] right right right think about it's like you know the poor guy gets to fuck the rich woman yeah
[00:07:57] which is awesome so like i imagine that translated into you know again not indian but
[00:08:03] sherpa indian or whatever whichever country it just wasn't india it's gotta be india dude what
[00:08:07] other country has that kind of skack they just spent all their money Bangladesh president of
[00:08:14] bangladesh ran on that platform of like we're gonna remake titanic people no we're gonna empty out
[00:08:20] the fucking treasure and one lucky poor man gets to fuck my wife yeah the rich one my wife plays
[00:08:25] rose yeah the most beautiful woman in bangladesh he just likes getting cucked this is all just a
[00:08:31] fucking huge cucks role play for every every jut apatel movie is like paul rud fucking
[00:08:42] avatars just like hey paul rud can you fuck my wife it's uh australian and chinese
[00:08:51] so you can buy it like a nice combo i don't know where i got indian being racist and wanting to
[00:08:55] do the voice yeah what's a chinese australian guy i'm sure it's all it's got to be nothing but
[00:09:01] the Arabs that are going on this trip huh oh yeah it's only arab that honestly sounds like
[00:09:06] Dubai more than anything yeah yeah yeah that's the kind of dumb shit that they do they love to waste
[00:09:10] their money on dumb things now back to my Vitamix yeah back in ice big ice big ice
[00:09:18] fucking huge no dude it's got to be chinese and uh australian i hate i fucking hate titanic i
[00:09:24] hate that whole i love the titties i hate that scene in the beginning where he's like titties were
[00:09:28] nice is it was it ever Abraham that's like he's the guy that's like yeah this ship is perfect not
[00:09:34] even god himself could sink it you know i mean i said the camera this is such a perfect ship that
[00:09:42] even in the third act of the movie nothing bad will happen um yeah that movie fucking sucked
[00:09:49] dick i don't know how old how old the lunch table i remember the lunch seven yeah the lunch
[00:09:53] table in fifth grade i like everyone that so many fourths after titanic came out they're like
[00:09:58] yo you see roses titties and she had some beautiful fat titties as far as titties look i would have
[00:10:03] been thrilled to see any titties but fucking roses titties what's what's the actually uh kate uh
[00:10:09] k-winsl did well i had like the my mom had like the vh chat like the no the double two vhs
[00:10:16] tapes yeah and so i would like i'd pop i'd pop one in pop one off and pop one in to my ass no i
[00:10:25] never i as we discussed i didn't jack off yeah Brandon doesn't beat off later but i would like
[00:10:31] just you know i'd appreciate titties but so you would just get hard and and not even touch your
[00:10:37] dick look at my boner you would look at it in the second just i'd just wait for it to go away
[00:10:44] i would i would get hard and i i'd slam my boner that's how i feel about your career Brandon
[00:10:50] come on just look at it wanted slowly dissipate
[00:11:01] dude just speed you can speed it up suck off his career and it'll go away faster
[00:11:06] how would you suck off my career i don't know i'm trying to figure that out
[00:11:10] put your entire mouth around you maybe you're the maybe you're the dick in this metaphor please
[00:11:14] expand this premise for an hour all right i got it hold on maybe we just here's how he's
[00:11:21] sucking off my career we film you sucking us off uh and release it as a sex tape one night in Brandon
[00:11:30] dude do you know do you know what Brandon's life is like in LA dude it's like he's got like the
[00:11:36] older brother character robes man good one baby bro good one baby bro and then he's got a turtle
[00:11:54] yeah we're still talking about titanic this is a character in titanic yeah yeah yeah no no we're
[00:11:59] talking about oh yeah i started reading a fact about how to remove the foam from my smoothies
[00:12:07] like a new producer set up dude this is like adam on but with a computer yeah it's true the
[00:12:12] computer and a desk and a desk i'm gonna go get my office chair out of the room all right go
[00:12:16] ahead what no i'm i'm helping i'm sure yeah i mean i looked up the thing i fact was that what
[00:12:22] does it say about the foam uh it's caused by uh insoluble fiber some shit i don't want to
[00:12:29] fucking learn science i just want to drink vegetables so i don't have to fucking make a salad i know
[00:12:36] that's absolutely the only reason i eat a fucking damn smoothie yeah dude just fucking
[00:12:40] blend that shit up never have to eat fucking gross ass vegetables you just eat bacon and eggs
[00:12:45] and then drink fucking veggies real quick that's what i do every morning i have a healthy s smoothie
[00:12:50] and then i eat like five strips of bacon are you a smoothie boy oh fuck yeah dude you have been
[00:12:55] paying attention to the happenings dude i got a damn vitamin x i got one first nik kind of
[00:12:59] copied me actually i think is the i had one first shut the fuck up no you didn't have one your room
[00:13:05] and your roommates had one right access to one first and you never brought it up you never i've
[00:13:10] never heard you talk about me because i'm not a big braggy pants like when's the last time he made
[00:13:13] a smoothie bitch last time i made a smoothie before i was make bad every time i've been in adam's
[00:13:18] apartment shut up every fucking time what did he make the whole answer adam what kind of smoothies
[00:13:24] there was a look at him there was like uh it was fucking he took out some like uh freezer berries
[00:13:32] yep that's what i was like this is what you do guys true smoothie head hours um you go to
[00:13:39] costco you get the frozen fruit the big ass bags of frozen that's fucking sugar dude you're
[00:13:44] making sorbet i'm making healthy motherfucking you add the fruit you just add the fruit and
[00:13:49] fruit taste yeah for taste you put you put a bunch of you know you should use kale and spinach
[00:13:55] no you should use just kale rather than spinach why dark leafy greens well spinach has uh oxates
[00:14:01] in it to fuck you up if you eat too much of it i'm not eating too much dude i mean a handful of
[00:14:05] spinach well you're gonna get fucking ox eight poisoning not i don't think fucking spinach
[00:14:10] poisoning is going to be my issue what do what else i think i think a couple other
[00:14:14] foods you get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get
[00:14:15] spanish poisoning and then your fucking forearms get huge fuck yeah and uh and you only want to
[00:14:21] fuck skig guys ugly with a guy named Bruno fucks your wife all the time your big fat friend
[00:14:26] who keeps trying to get you to buy cheeseburgers for us i always was not i would have fucked
[00:14:30] out all of what was not i always had a big ass fucking she was not she she was not thick she was
[00:14:35] not thick i'm about to look up alfoyle right the fuck now she look like she's ugly she was skinny
[00:14:40] shit have you seen whatever all bodies are beautiful yeah pull up alfoyle have you seen the
[00:14:45] robin williams uh robert altman popeye yeah it's a piece of shit we seen the lee gold robert altman
[00:14:51] popeye dude she's got big ass feet big ass pants it's called one eye to pop the lee roger popeye
[00:14:57] that's my favorite one dude oh man shots out elia roger big the elia the little ass
[00:15:05] size would have been so funny if you didn't was on r slash cringe like three days before he killed
[00:15:10] de-stabbed all the people is that real yeah that's like that's i think i've been a joke
[00:15:15] foodie was talking about watching the elia roger videos yeah before it happened really
[00:15:20] being like oh no whoops yikes i should have said something but i don't know like the whole r slash
[00:15:27] crayfish community fucked up on that one yeah well you know because there's so many there's so
[00:15:33] many elia roger's online that don't do elia roger right right right right you know yeah yeah yeah
[00:15:41] yeah r r i p rest in peace early r slash cringe like fell off though um i've never i've never gone
[00:15:48] i'm not a big writer boy i used to be a real cringe head yeah yeah i use you're the kind of guy
[00:15:53] that would shit on reddit and then just exclusively go to reddit for entertainment as a in your
[00:15:59] d in the virginia days dude yeah you used to remember used to be to reddit oh absolutely no i still do
[00:16:05] yeah there's like so many subreddits that are but except pornhub gave gave me a free premium account
[00:16:12] so what's pornhub premium what's that what is that damn extra shit pornhub premium dot
[00:16:17] com and like shit they have more stuff it's well it's all the side all the stuff that they normally
[00:16:22] have uh-huh no ads no ads what's your logan also like fucking like extra shit like real premium
[00:16:30] shit my username is sexual jumanji can i have it also give us my avatar is alex jones
[00:16:37] give us the logan bitch i'll share i'll share my yeah hell yeah dude i just vaulted himself into
[00:16:45] number one friend of the show i V though that that's not happening let's just give it as the
[00:16:50] pornhub dude what's that he's giving us his pornhub premium account who gives his shit you pay for
[00:16:56] pornography no i would never pay gave me a free premium account but who can what the fuck is the
[00:17:01] worth of that who's still what what the fuck you get out of uh out of pornhub premium oh i mean
[00:17:07] i hope you're i hope you're sponsored by them and we're fucking up your endorsement
[00:17:11] right now i was sitting all over pornhub premium who the why the fuck would you ever want that
[00:17:16] they got some brazors vids cool vids you can download all that shit that block doesn't work on
[00:17:20] pornhub like i i've used like pornhub don't use pornhub you have this like so every porn every
[00:17:27] point flight has as anyone you know what it should be every every time i'm paying for pornography and
[00:17:32] downloading child porn should be the same crime she go to jail for the equal amount of time for
[00:17:37] doing either one of those i would never pay for i would never pay for porn but i would accept a
[00:17:42] free premium sure absolutely um do they have is it kind of like Netflix where they have like
[00:17:48] different providers like they get you get that good brazor shit or the there's some of that okay
[00:17:52] yeah okay you know i was thinking that you said there's a lot of premium exclusives i love it
[00:17:58] see nick if you agree well don't say anything but you're holding the microphone hold on
[00:18:04] he agrees if you if you agree wipe wipe your mouth with a keep spilling juice everywhere i just
[00:18:12] discovered i was saying outside i just discovered this guy if you i was like on uh ex-hamster porn
[00:18:19] hub or something and there's this guy you know which one it was who does interviews with porn
[00:18:25] stars that like conventions it's like this little creepy italian man who wears suits and he's like
[00:18:30] i'm here with the most beautiful woman in the world lisa ham he's like isn't she beautiful
[00:18:38] and they made do like a really like uh fucking awkward interview someone one of the fans
[00:18:42] fun find that guy for me he was like a paparazzi he's a porno paparazzi yeah he's like a porno yeah
[00:18:48] like it like uh he sounds like a super fan he seems to be the italian afghan
[00:18:52] i love beating off my favorite thing to do is go to the cafe and have a cup of cheese and
[00:19:00] beat off i gotta find this guy enough you're talking about a cramp earlier yeah yeah yeah
[00:19:05] there's one of like the top videos was that dude losing his virginity to a porn star oh yeah yeah
[00:19:11] yeah yeah yeah one star remember that one suck yeah one that was on e-fucked first oh yeah e-fucked
[00:19:16] he fucked his throwback dude that's classic i like that this should be you know it's fucked up
[00:19:22] that millennials get get lumped into the same category because it's definitely a generational
[00:19:27] gap between people that are from the mean internet right where the internet used to internet that
[00:19:31] was my internet that informed my personality we got something awful a borderline psychopath yeah yeah
[00:19:37] and then this new internet that's like you're not allowed to hurt anybody's feelings ever that's why
[00:19:43] you log on is to be nice what the fuck are you talking about yo they're using this the completely
[00:19:49] wrong way yeah dude the best video ever saw it he fucked with this fucking guy it was a couple and
[00:19:57] it was just like these creepy white people that hired some like black dude to fuck you know it's
[00:20:00] like a cuck and the guy so the the black guy sitting at the edge that the top of the bed and the
[00:20:07] husband i guess is fucking his wife like to warm her up or whatever yeah and so the guy's head the
[00:20:13] their head is by the guy's dick and the guy's fucking his wife wait and he keeps inching close
[00:20:18] with every pump he comes closer uh-huh he inches closer to the guy's dick and he just starts sucking
[00:20:24] off the black dude who's like waiting to fucking wife so he's fucking his wife the guy's fucking
[00:20:29] his wife before the black guy fucks it and as he fucks his wife he sucks off the black dude he comes
[00:20:33] up like fucking coming up her air and starts sucking off like with every pump he gets a little
[00:20:38] suck off and the guys are the best it's the best fucking face i've ever seen in my life the guy
[00:20:44] is just like it's like the fucking it's like the uh the uh he's like smiling no he's like fucking
[00:20:50] weirding out he's like oh man he doesn't want to know no no it's like the fucking walk up it's like
[00:20:56] the walk up like okay meme like he's making those weird side eyes just getting his dick sucked
[00:21:05] can you imagine thing you're gonna fuck someone's wife and some guy starts sucking your dick
[00:21:09] fuck the black guy thinking of his yeah oh yes the fuck okay yeah he's like so not into getting his
[00:21:17] dick sucked it was awesome yeah dude check out that vid guys if you can find it it's brought a
[00:21:23] lot of joy to my life my two favorites were uh on efuk there's one that was like you know it's uh
[00:21:29] two women on a bed and they're shoving eels in their pussy yeah like fucking electric eels in their
[00:21:35] pussies and then this camera slowly tracks to the side and the shot gets wider and then it just
[00:21:41] this guy from the edge of the frame comes in and he's got like a blowfish and he's just fucking it
[00:21:45] in the mouth slowly is just standing next to the women and he's like shoving this dumbfishes
[00:21:52] head over his dick and it's inflating because it doesn't know what else to do other than to get
[00:21:57] bigger probably making the experience more pleasurable for the man like i why don't have spikes on the
[00:22:04] inside i didn't think about this i was worried about being eaten and something much worse happened
[00:22:10] that's like a perfect lesson for life you know absolutely we all we all have our spikes in a
[00:22:15] lot of ways and then what happens the irs comes and they stick their dick in your mouth absolutely
[00:22:19] that's why roller britain answer or something cancer is is that dick going into the blowfishes
[00:22:25] mouth um fuck oh and then the second one my other favorite one was uh it was some website where
[00:22:32] it was like it was like glory hole surprise or something yeah or like a you know i gotta be like
[00:22:37] you know what what would the surprise be like what do you think is coming out of that hole so it'd
[00:22:42] be like you know a guy that's like you know uh like all right let me let me you know he's like it
[00:22:47] would be so but shot from the girl side of the glory hole and you know be a guy like you know
[00:22:52] she's like pass the money underneath and he's like let me see like a titty or something so she
[00:22:55] like put her together and then we're almost started sucking the guy's dick and then she like trades
[00:22:59] off for like a guy but the guy always has a mustache so like the guy who like feel like the man's
[00:23:06] mustache and then fucking be like oh fuck fuck you know i'm like right because that real yeah yeah oh
[00:23:13] that's awesome yeah let me see if i can find it we should do that we should do pranks like that
[00:23:18] guy yeah that's great dude that's like impract i think impractical joker's to the show i think i
[00:23:23] i think uh that's such a great impractical joke extremely practical joker's
[00:23:31] oh fuck yeah that was glory hole surprise on mtv too
[00:23:38] yeah rob do you hereby rob dierdex glory hole surprise
[00:23:42] what those videos could be like whoa what shanell just giggling for no reason had absolutely nothing
[00:23:52] to the show oh yeah that's oh like it's it's just uh that whole show is like rob being like oh man like
[00:24:01] oh uh oh like good job falling and then shanell always goes to be like that's gotta hurt rob
[00:24:07] um it's just it's just out my balls the tv show literally oh it's completely out my balls
[00:24:12] it's out my boss i rode on it for two days one time oh yeah ridiculous it was like
[00:24:17] yeah anything do you get any sketches on it was they they like you like yell out jokes and that
[00:24:22] it was like Andy Haynes like hooked me up with it it was like uh it was like uh i like wasn't doing
[00:24:28] anything that week and i was like oh i want money this week yeah uh can you let love me in the room
[00:24:33] but yeah i think rob dierdex didn't like me yeah what i get i wonder why dude yo i would have just
[00:24:39] walked in there fucking yeah rob you and rob dierdex are the same guy except rob dierdex can like
[00:24:43] actually skateboard he has like one actual talent and it's misapplied and you have zero talents
[00:24:52] he also is the founder and dc issues yeah yeah he's a very good business yeah he's a great business man
[00:24:59] now i'm just watching porn look yo i can't find this Italian guy that interviews the porn stars
[00:25:06] i've been really fun but it sounds like another classic adam freedlin lie i can't find it but
[00:25:11] content that doesn't exist it's real just pitching a sketch no i'm here with the most beautiful girl
[00:25:20] you know this is a spanish porn producer named like torbet or something i can't remember his name
[00:25:25] but he's just like chode he looks like he's a guy like a ron jeremy thing going on but he doesn't
[00:25:30] have a big dick he's just some chode guy and he like fucks all these high women he's like i make
[00:25:35] bone he's boar out yeah basically oh everyone who's not from america is boar out
[00:25:44] yeah you could just make porn people are fucking i knew a guy i know a guy yeah what where is that
[00:25:50] where's that smell coming from the cat shit again where is it from the right or behind you
[00:25:54] behind you dumbass pick him up dude suck off the turds let's put the cat shit on brandon
[00:26:03] um show prank we're gonna treat you like an intern here we should get an intern we should get an
[00:26:09] intern that could just go fucking buy smoothie supplies for me that would be awesome i'm sitting
[00:26:14] here next to my sweet laser printer yeah we should get some like jewish girl from westchester that
[00:26:19] goes to nyu yeah they'll be so that works so hard why don't we just dress you up like a jewish
[00:26:24] girl i could do it i could be rude right now we can because she's gonna fall in love with me and
[00:26:29] i'll seduce her i need your name to jerry i need jerry now i used to do a bit like when everyone's
[00:26:35] fucking catching up yeah that he has felt so bad i used to do a bit when uh everyone was like
[00:26:40] isis the new terris group with nah it's licking its own asshole
[00:26:46] anyway what were you saying about isis do a bit where it was like isis the new terris group with
[00:26:50] great social media presence and i was like yeah that's all because of uh rebecca goldstein
[00:26:56] recent graduate of my ish like yeah i got an internship um they don't pay me yet but it's for
[00:27:02] a startup and they're growing really fast they're called isis and uh oh my god this cat
[00:27:10] um great broadcasting hell yeah dude do you have an internship yeah i i interned at the peace
[00:27:17] court headquarters in dc when i was in college damn and uh i used to just go through people's i was
[00:27:24] in the office of medical records i was just filing but i just read how people got fucked up on the
[00:27:28] peace corps oh shit like oh shit like and it was pretty sad i mean there you know there was like a
[00:27:33] lot of um because they really put you out there alone you know you're like in indigenous villages
[00:27:39] and stuff like all that and there were a lot of girls that were filing for abortions through
[00:27:44] workers comp because they're so lonely out there that they like had sex with like a local guy and
[00:27:49] then they got pregnant yeah and um through workers comp you get a workers comp i guess so they're like
[00:27:55] yeah i guess that's a good deal yeah dude yeah yeah i mean that that's maybe that seems kind of
[00:28:01] crazy you just get dicked down what the cat shit literally right behind Brandon i didn't even make
[00:28:08] it to the fucking yeah just shit on the floor yeah please please clean this up it's like stifling
[00:28:14] we have to wait until the show's over dude yeah dude there's no we're in the middle of the show you
[00:28:19] know unprofessional it be to get up and go do something else in the middle of the show just open the
[00:28:25] window last time i was here it ended because yeah the cat threw up the cat they kind of like threw
[00:28:30] up everyone's fucking honest dude they're pretty terrible cats yeah and then they get to deal with
[00:28:36] like house breaking cat currently yeah i want a nice little cute cat that's what i want come with
[00:28:42] that cute little cat my mom's cat's are tight as shit dude these fucking you know you're talking
[00:28:48] about your dad oh my dad yeah christmas break he's growing up before did i i don't think i even did
[00:28:55] no no but to talk more about that like i that you tweeted about yeah yeah you put Hercules's game
[00:29:01] like my little brother troll yeah we just told my fucking father all christmas he was my little
[00:29:08] brother hey i tweeted this but he put Alexander the Great was gay on google translate and played
[00:29:14] it in greek and my dad was like what the fuck first of all he doesn't know what google translate is
[00:29:19] he has no idea right that you can get a computer to read something for you he thinks the computer
[00:29:24] just hates greek yeah he thinks he thinks he thinks he's like some he and then he was like who said that
[00:29:28] he asked my brother who it was and then eventually he asked if it was syri because i guess he's
[00:29:36] knows what syri is he's like was that syri is that what syri is just makes fun of fucking greek people
[00:29:42] and then my little brother put then he put Alexander the Great Fox little boys
[00:29:51] and then he said he had a little penis so by that point i think my father finally got it but
[00:29:56] yeah it's fun trolling my fucking dumb ass my dumb ass dad he has so much greek pride for
[00:30:04] no fucking reason well he got a lot to be proud of yeah dude he's got a successful son that's right
[00:30:11] you know that's now does he know about putkas he has no idea what the putkas is he doesn't know
[00:30:17] about the putkas no no man i wish he did come see me at mcgoobie's and uh after years of telling
[00:30:23] me to quit comedy he was like oh yeah you could keep doing comedy he liked it he liked it yeah yeah
[00:30:28] he thought it was funny he thought he left funny but i don't think he understood half the shit
[00:30:32] what is this was people's parents telling him to quit comedy i guess i was such a fuck up as a
[00:30:35] teenager that the one thing i was like you know doing something you were glad you just weren't
[00:30:40] setting ceiling fire you know my parents literally and i like it was it was so ridiculous they got so
[00:30:48] mad that they literally said they were gonna sue me that is the most you wish how the fuck
[00:30:55] that's how you going to sue me yeah they said they were going to sue me because your education
[00:31:01] they made a deal with me before undergrad that i would be going to law school that's fucking
[00:31:06] a deal i don't know what kind of deal i was like all right okay sue me guys you sound very you
[00:31:12] sound like you're being very reasonable this is good we were about to go to law school yeah yeah
[00:31:18] when we went to that drake concert in dc we got grinded on but hey child by a child adam
[00:31:24] adam told us to get talked about it but he fucked up teenagers yeah we're gonna upload
[00:31:28] we're gonna upload it it'll be on the premium episode if you want to hear that story yeah
[00:31:32] yeah adam fucked up teenager i did not fuck a teenager the previous four two
[00:31:37] live show will go up today and then this episode will go up tomorrow okay okay cool and in brand
[00:31:43] and you said you we have to edit out your set it out myself why did you bomb no you know i had like
[00:31:49] seven out of ten set that i don't want on the podcast let's just put on the podcast let's find
[00:31:54] like a little kid talking about being gay and when we introduce brandon and make sure that cat
[00:32:00] doesn't jump up wait brand are you friends with that kid though the basic
[00:32:05] low Anthony yeah yeah your friends i know him yeah dude that kid rules calling all the basic
[00:32:10] yeah calling all the basic i remember Brandon sent me this video from world star like like four
[00:32:15] years ago twerking to the birthday cake and the the day where the video was like seriously
[00:32:20] parrot yo son oh yeah father yo kids father yo kids a little child twerks to riana's birthday cake
[00:32:28] it's like well Anthony being like hey guys so uh i'm wearing my uh school uniform like i uh
[00:32:38] i'm praying to god and uh i'm a little you know yeah he was super christian i'm a boy who loves
[00:32:43] Jesus and loves to twerp so i'm gonna just do a little twerp for Jesus and he like plays birthday
[00:32:50] cake that's like it rules i mean his other video name on his other video that have you seen his other
[00:32:57] video that i was obsessed with Brandon i brand it shows me he has like this tells me his leg yeah
[00:33:02] he's like flipping his leg around he's on his bed he's like calling all the basic bitches
[00:33:06] yeah basic bitches calling all the basic bitches there's a new announcement yeah basic
[00:33:12] i remember that video that video pissed me off so obviously it sounds like black steward
[00:33:17] black steward from ed tv no i just i was yeah his voice wasn't uh bros in the
[00:33:22] white kind yeah he's like a yeah he's like a gay white kid yeah like who went to like christian
[00:33:28] private school and he was doing like twerk videos for god yeah it rules yeah he rules he's super he's
[00:33:34] like he really he found his fucking audience where is he how old is he now he's like 19
[00:33:39] was he really in LA now is he trying to be a guy lives in LA like he's friends with like
[00:33:43] Ariana Grande and sure everybody like loves him yeah he rules yeah lo Anthony is like he really
[00:33:50] like fucking figured it out good for him good for him and then like she's oh she around youtube yeah
[00:33:56] she's super around Brandon saying all this so that he thinks in his mind there's hope for himself
[00:34:04] all these gay youtube stars all these gay internet children fucking have a youtube hit yo you know
[00:34:09] who's still around and like i'm so happy before danny trejo i saw him in that i saw i had a really
[00:34:15] good why than that harambe video why wouldn't he you know i i thought harambe video was really
[00:34:20] big for him and you know he had a great 2016 he was with some faggot yeah
[00:34:26] stop don't just brand this here don't say i'm sorry yeah it's homophobic for starters
[00:34:35] and secondly you know he's sitting right there
[00:34:37] yeah yo um how old is Rebecca black can i can i fuck oh yeah Rebecca black is like very
[00:34:47] a bitch nice whatever fucker she's not even attractive she's just like an okay looking girl
[00:34:52] you're just excited at the idea that she was a child at one point yeah i'm gonna beat off to that
[00:34:56] video i'm gonna play it in my headphones while i fuck her um no i don't know i think she had some
[00:35:03] kind of i think i did see a recent picture where i was like nice no i think she's like a babe though
[00:35:09] yeah see nick brandon says she's a babe you know who's really hot nogas the the baby from uh dinosaurs
[00:35:22] the baby you gotta fuck me baby suck my penis you gotta fuck me
[00:35:33] dude i felt so bad for that dad dude he used to get the shit beat out of it by that baby
[00:35:39] yeah like slapping the face you know i couldn't tell the difference between that show and rosane
[00:35:44] yeah it was like sort of the same thing yeah they were the same show they looked the same
[00:35:49] now the mom wasn't fat in dinosaurs was she wasn't the whole point that it was dinosaur
[00:35:53] Simpsons no it was like yeah that was the point of the show like this dinosaur simpson this
[00:36:00] one was dinosaur Bart now he was he was older and cooler than yeah he had the same hairstyle as
[00:36:06] Bart everyone did it was the 1990s that's what people's hair looked like wasn't he a tricerat no
[00:36:11] he was a stegosaurus he had spiky hair yeah there was all types of like uh trans species type of
[00:36:17] shit you know they were fucking sucking well a lot of there's a lot of that in children's
[00:36:21] entertainment because there was so many after like the huge success of teenage mutin ninja
[00:36:26] turtles they had like 19 different spin-offs or not spin-offs but not the shark they had a
[00:36:30] shark street shark street shark is good there's probably the most successful of all the rip-offs
[00:36:34] but there was a bunch of them like biker mice from mars was a show that was on like fox box yeah
[00:36:40] damn um yeah there's a couple other ones yo i fucked the street sharks yeah basically like
[00:36:46] there's three types of children shows and they just remake them over and over right yeah like
[00:36:50] japan does that like power rangers uh that's like the one show we have here but there's like 800
[00:36:56] different shows that are basically just power rangers in fucking in japan uh hi i'm sabaan
[00:37:04] yeah well they imported sabaan yeah he's like a big donor to he was a big donor to hillary uh
[00:37:13] they imported it at power rangers but like there's uh there's a fucking there's this version of
[00:37:18] spider mr. loss this version of spider-man that was shot in japan in like the 1970s and like
[00:37:24] oh i've seen that shit it's hilarious and then like you know he's doing spider-man shit also it's
[00:37:38] great because the mask the eyes are more chinese yeah yeah they had like even more they made them
[00:37:43] even poinsier and then like uh fucking so you're watching the intro to the spider-man japanese
[00:37:49] and then all of a sudden there's like uh there's a gundom there's just spider-man also has a gundom
[00:37:55] they fucking couldn't just not put a gundom in spider-man
[00:38:00] you're so good Italian spider-man that video you haven't seen it you haven't seen it i don't
[00:38:07] know if it's like fake or because it's too awesome to like not be a little tongue-in-cheek i think
[00:38:12] i i saw it briefly but it's just like some fat guy with a gun in a spider-man
[00:38:16] yeah it's pretty good he's got like a mustache he doesn't wear the mask half the time
[00:38:20] it's good shit baby um spider-man de ruse well all the hearts on brandon's facebook live just
[00:38:39] went away for the fake for being racist japanese they didn't like it it's all the tacos yeah it's all
[00:38:52] that's worse that's cultural appropriation that's actually that's all they have when i make up a
[00:38:57] language it sounds like japanese that's fucking art it's an original creation and it's respectful
[00:39:03] but when you dress when you decide to go around smelling like shit and clutching your anime body
[00:39:09] pillow that's cultural if you fuck cartoons that's cultural appropriation dude i had a fucking
[00:39:16] sweetmate that had jade chopsticks a sweetmate yeah this is your time in london yeah flatmate
[00:39:24] you took the law redone to the you educated dog we down to uni we went to uni to play footy
[00:39:30] with the other fucking shut up i won't be fucking talked down to by fucking colleges two college
[00:39:36] drops absolutely mental in it i didn't drop out of college i just didn't go so i didn't fail anything
[00:39:41] uh high school and college dropout respect yeah me and sob finished i actually didn't true champion
[00:39:46] you didn't you didn't finish no i didn't get my and me and brandon are way more successful than
[00:39:51] the both of you yes i'm sorry you bitch i'm executive vice president of maulin media i'm the head of the
[00:39:56] union i'm the union boss and i'm mobbed the fuck up guys i was like that's last exit to springfield
[00:40:06] when homer like imagines himself is like the union leader and i'm like yeah and eventually
[00:40:11] you'll get in with organized crime and then he has that fantasy where he's going around as the dawn
[00:40:16] and he's just giving him donuts he's like molto banei
[00:40:19] that's me that's me that's me that's me that's such a fucking good show the simpsons great show
[00:40:26] yeah shout out to the simpsons kids you might want to check it out stop fucking looking at the
[00:40:30] camera you goddamn narcissist anything no you keep looking at your own reflection and i can't see
[00:40:35] it it's so small well so you're looking at yourself and doing poses and shit
[00:40:42] hey kids hey kids uh check out this new dance move i made up
[00:40:51] yikes damn somebody said uh i wish staff had a different laugh well guess what bitch i don't
[00:41:00] suck my dick and lick my ass hey brendan if you're periscoping our podcast you're gonna have to pay
[00:41:05] us money yeah did you license this yeah yeah i didn't license it nobody agreed first of all you're
[00:41:10] gonna say you're gonna mix our ability to upload your set and then you're gonna periscope our
[00:41:15] podcast for free wait the the pie it's you're gonna put the agreement twelve hundred dollars
[00:41:20] yeah you always know at least you always twelve hundred dollars yeah
[00:41:25] each no come on don't be ridiculous don't be ridiculous just four four hundred each
[00:41:30] you know what for a friend 397 that's fair um or you can give us all head on camera
[00:41:37] oh that's so much easier no because that would be like that would be good that would be
[00:41:45] that's good content yeah that would be randomly good Brandon sucky and dick he's like oh this is
[00:41:50] great content dude you see this gate sex jake get your camera this great content who is that boy
[00:41:58] that you just fucking the fat boy sexual jimongi i don't know who this is he's a boy brand and
[00:42:04] takes pictures of a game where he's oh yeah have you met sex jay we've never met we follow you
[00:42:10] follow each other and i love him he's hilarious yeah he fucking rules yeah he's a cute little he
[00:42:14] hasn't fucked right he still hasn't fucked i'm gonna get that guy to fuck somebody's got a fuck sexual
[00:42:19] jimongi in 2017 yeah i started well dude this is great content i'm fucking sucking him off oh yeah
[00:42:26] i got a suck off sex dude do it for the culture dude i'm doing this for the culture so for all the
[00:42:33] kumbos out there Brandon found a fat adorable virgin in where minnesota or something mawakki
[00:42:38] mawakki and you move him out that you fly him out to l.a i didn't fly we were gonna we were gonna
[00:42:44] split the cost me and robsen we were good fucking flying out to l.a and robsen was like good one baby
[00:42:51] bro he ended up just like buying a ticket to l.a but he's just some like gamer that like fucking loves
[00:42:58] to he's a hype beast to oh yeah he's a gamer who also like loves like hype wearing babe and he's
[00:43:05] funny he's funny he's got funny tweets he can he he'll post funny tweets but yeah he'll also like
[00:43:10] complain about like his mom buying the wrong so yeah which is awesome but that's all part of it
[00:43:14] that's all part of which oh yeah um yeah we got if if you're a kumboy and you see sex jay you have
[00:43:21] to suck his dick even if he doesn't want you to so that's that's out there rape brandon's friend
[00:43:26] so that's settled oh yeah remember when you thought that song we were listening to when the car was about rape oh yeah that song was about rape
[00:43:38] Brandon's uh Brandon's other friend is pop punk l.a. friend made a song about raping a past-ass girl
[00:43:45] and they're like isn't this cool dude it's like pop punk and i'm like this song's about raping a past-ass
[00:43:50] how does the song go it's it says uh she's too drunk to fuck no she's he's like i only hit her up when i'm taking what the dead canada
[00:43:57] song no like she's too fucked up to fuck me and i'm too fucked up to give a fuck yeah yeah yeah i think
[00:44:04] they're like not fucking yeah that's what i thought too but there's definitely i thought that was the point but like yeah well i mean they didn't even talk about that
[00:44:11] fuck he's like even if it's a song about not fucking he should have just read his own lyrics and been like holy shit what the fuck am i saying
[00:44:17] yo that's uh yeah um this yeah it's like that it's also illegal to rape in hollywood i will be your father if you're a fake
[00:44:24] sex sport is is broken psyches from years of sexual abuse i just wanted to be an actress it's also pressed yeah man i wish there's an alternate timeline where brain is definitely sucking off like some fat jewish producer for role
[00:44:39] it's an alternate timeline it's a subconscious yeah it's all that shit c o vica i just i just blacked out for four and a half days i just got really drunk and blacked out for seven and a half weeks dude that's a normal thing to have
[00:44:54] Brandon told me about when he when he moved to hollywood he got off the plane he had a bindle and like a stick and a little and a little uh jonnie apple seed bindle and a limo pulled up and old man was in it and he's like you want a career kid you're a kid you want a career kid
[00:45:08] and then he's Brandon had a open up so it was uh he gave me a drug by Bowdenkirk he gave me a drug yeah oh yeah Brandon fucked my Andy Dick also Andy Dick licks my ear once at a
[00:45:23] festival yeah five years ago his ear and then his asshole and in that order and then he fucked him in the ass also and that is true if it's true just laugh Brandon or be silenced wait dude Brandon why you laugh wait
[00:45:41] oh my ex girlfriend like Brandon when he was a child used to be hanging out at our apartment and like he wouldn't understand the social cues that we were going to sleep like we would literally be getting into bed and Brandon would be like anyway can i show you this next video
[00:45:58] and then and then like my ex girlfriend would just be like Brandon get the fuck out of our house and you'd be like no no no no no I'm sorry no no no no sorry no no sorry no no sorry no no sorry no sorry
[00:46:16] I mean, yeah, but I just kind of blackout. I just black out everything
[00:46:21] Pre those cute dude every negative emotion. You're way cuter when you were a freak like that
[00:46:27] Now you're not people are saying that they're mad that Sam wasn't on the podcast
[00:46:31] What I can't figure out what these fucking people want well
[00:46:33] We said we just shouldn't have said we you told people that Sam was Sam called me and he was like I'm in town
[00:46:40] I'm gonna do the podcast and then we tried to we had a day we didn't do it. So you like announced it
[00:46:44] Yeah, well, I said an podcast like yes, and might come by you know
[00:46:48] It just didn't happen didn't work out and then people I said I was like, oh we can get Sam on and people were like you fucking
[00:46:55] Cunt you piece of shit cuz that's how people react to anything
[00:46:59] Like what do you mean they made see three p.o's arm red? I hope George Lucas gets ass cancer
[00:47:05] Fuckin I'll go see the movie, but I'm fucking hate it. I'm gonna buy a thousand dollars with the merchandise. Yeah, yeah
[00:47:10] So yeah, I guess people were mad that Sam was even gonna be on the show because of the world peace thing
[00:47:19] We had Felix on for the Christmas one and now people are like we're the fucking Sam
[00:47:23] Yeah, we shouldn't have teased it whatever. Yeah, whatever dude. We have very big penises. Yeah
[00:47:29] I don't know we're we got we got video content coming soon
[00:47:34] You know that's we promise that that's happening. We're gonna set we're gonna figure out a fucking schedule to make that happen
[00:47:40] And then we're gonna lose all our fans when they see
[00:47:43] You know how severe my reserved affect and spectrum behavior actually is in real life
[00:47:51] Bad our posture. Yeah. Yeah my fucking terrible posture my inability to control my face
[00:47:57] It's gonna be great or maybe they don't think we're cute
[00:48:01] Yeah, they'll think I'm cute. I'm cute as shit. Okay. I'm cutest hell
[00:48:08] What's up girls holler at me if you try to food dude, this is the the
[00:48:14] Periscope ruins this you think so. Yeah, why there's only like three people in it
[00:48:25] 1339 nice damn. That's a lot of people. Yeah, that's good
[00:48:29] I'll drive some of these puppy filters when we go when we do when we did the road the road
[00:48:38] Periscope, I don't ever periscope, but we did one on the road and it was like wow 27 people
[00:48:48] But we had to drive down to DC to do I guess that Sam or all shit. Oh, yes. Yes, but was it?
[00:48:54] I'm just the big home of Sam Marill. Oh
[00:48:56] Oh three three nice, huh three all boys
[00:49:02] No, I think Sam took a we came back with him, but who gives a fuck?
[00:49:06] We just drove down solo Dolo. We went to the fucking Amish market. That was a good fucking day
[00:49:12] I want Chinese. I mean a fried chicken, but actually I don't we had so much fun at that Amish market
[00:49:17] I love my favorite thing to do with the Amish market is make like
[00:49:20] a long-gated eye contact with the Amish girls
[00:49:26] Because they're not allowed to fuck so if you just look at them very fuckily they get really uncomfortable
[00:49:32] Which I know is just harassment, but it's more of an anti religion thing than anything
[00:49:37] I'm not doing it because I would actually fuck them. I do it because I like to you know fuck up there
[00:49:43] Well, I want to just fuck up their culture and I love their food
[00:49:46] But it's a weird thing that they do it is a very people they get a pass because they're like old-timey and people think of them like
[00:49:52] Vintage furniture or a Victoria or whatever, but they're human beings with like a weird ideology
[00:49:58] Yeah, I don't know what they're doing, but I'm sure it's wrong and bad. We visit their shops. So we're like, oh, it's cute
[00:50:04] Yeah, they're little novelties. Yeah, I'm not their novelty people. We should try and seduce. Yeah, I'm sure they all voted for Trump
[00:50:11] Like the same ish the his seeds in the Amish all voted for yeah, the classes voted for Trump
[00:50:17] Oh, yeah, remember like somebody oh oh it was Darcy posted that that thing where it was like oh look at this this
[00:50:24] Williamsburg map of voters. Oh, yeah, it was hipsters right, but it was only it was like us
[00:50:29] It wasn't all Williamsburg. It was just like the dad's really wish part and she was like I can't I can't believe you guys
[00:50:36] Yeah, it's and then one of you was arguing with her. I don't know if it was yeah, I don't give a fuck
[00:50:42] I'll give a fuck about politics, dude. I'm a fucking Brandon's a little politics boy now
[00:50:48] Yeah, he's got a job ahead asked to be on Chappo, which turned out to be the worst episode of that show by the way
[00:50:56] I never listened to more thread. It's the most apolitical episode and people were threatened to cancel their subscriptions
[00:51:02] Yeah, but like by the time I subscribe to choppa like they had all the comments on patreon so
[00:51:11] But like people send me screenshots on Twitter. Yeah. Oh, yeah, there's some there's some people mad
[00:51:17] People really mad about our Kurt Metzger episode. Yeah, which is surprising Kurt's like Kurt's like the
[00:51:22] In terms of the intersection of biggest name and guy. I'm like good friends with
[00:51:26] Mm-hmm. That was like the the the ace in my sleeve of like oh well we can always have Kurt on and Kurt's great
[00:51:33] I think Kurt's like the best comic in New York and then it was just weird and we just fucking talked about Russia
[00:51:42] Yeah, the gym's always been gyms always been kind of like he's it's weird because he's helped me out a lot
[00:51:48] And he's like never been mean, but he's always been sort of icy towards me
[00:51:52] And I thought that was just how Jim was but then I did Jim and Sam and people were like why is Jim being like, you know
[00:51:59] Cold to you. I'm like I have no fucking idea
[00:52:01] Apparently Jim was the one that asked for me to be on the show
[00:52:06] But you know I wrote for his his TV show so like I don't maybe he does like maybe that's maybe that means he likes you
[00:52:11] I don't yeah, that's like a flirt. Maybe wants to kiss you. Yeah, I don't think it's sad. I think it's I
[00:52:16] Think I think Kurt vouch for me like a decent amount and that got me the job on the show
[00:52:22] And I think I did a good job on the show, but he didn't like particularly
[00:52:25] I don't think Jim thinks I'm funny, but I think like enough people around him say I'm funny
[00:52:31] So that Jim's like all right. I'll you know help this guy out. Yeah, but he doesn't give a shit
[00:52:42] Where you know I understand a lot of people like him. I personally think he's a shithead
[00:52:47] But I'll let him be on my show and I won't ever look at him
[00:52:53] Yeah, that's what the boss pod you were you were trying to get lunch
[00:52:58] You're I'm exposing you let me hold on. Let me pause the recording for a second
[00:53:05] Never once we're gonna fucking kill you and we're back
[00:53:18] That's cute. Yeah, I want to get fun for lunch. Did you actually stop recording? Of course not
[00:53:32] It's called acting you fucking child. I'm a brilliant actor such a clear radio bit
[00:53:45] Sorry dude. I didn't mean to see that. Yeah, but just sometimes you know like all the fucking thing you're fucking stupid
[00:53:50] But you know I gotta yell you for the thing, but anyway, dude. I can't wait for lunch
[00:53:54] Yeah, it's like a I can't wait to go out to lunch with fucking dumb asshole man
[00:53:58] I'm a fucking idiot dude. It's like shut up. You fuck up the bit and like people you have to say to me
[00:54:05] Turn the thing back on they get it. No, they don't dude. They can see it. They're closing their eyes and they can see it
[00:54:11] Can you theater of the mind? Can you pause? I just want to say one more thing you pause you
[00:54:14] Hold on but but now because I'm considering lunch we talked about it. What are we going to blend for lunch?
[00:54:22] Can you pause it? Can you pause it once sure? I love that this this thing will never pay for itself. No, I'm not gonna
[00:54:28] Spend five hundred dollars on vegetables in my entire life. I you know I did spend a lot
[00:54:33] I've been spending a lot of dude fruits of vegetables
[00:54:35] I love when people are like cool produce is getting expensive and it's like yeah
[00:54:40] I fucking buy grudges anyway, dude. You'd come with like an immigrant
[00:54:45] Like some kind of fucking immigrant with a bunch of dead chickens in the kitchen
[00:54:51] breakfast lunch second lunch dinner night brunch
[00:54:55] Supper I have supper and dinner. Oh very continental. Yeah, is it continental? I thought that was more of like a plantation
[00:55:02] Yes, I don't know I have no breeds yet. Huh? Yeah, put in Brandon's code so you can make another million dollars
[00:55:10] I've got like I just eat so much free uber eats because I've like posted my code a bunch of really I
[00:55:16] Just I put it in my bio and I like had them showed on MTV once very nice. It's seven
[00:55:26] Brand new friends a bitch I tried to I tried to get flesh light. I sent an email to their business development
[00:55:36] I'll like review the information and then they I guess they saw the name of the podcast and just completely
[00:55:42] The one podcast they should be letting their name. Yeah, I don't know. I mean they sponsored moon tower
[00:55:48] Adam and Eve dude, I don't know I'll figure that in your ass dude
[00:55:52] You make so much money off like sponsorships Adam and Eve cow
[00:55:57] I just you have like a top 100 comedy podcast which we do right you know you can get fucking
[00:56:03] You can get like five thousand dollars an episode. No. Yeah. Yeah, yeah
[00:56:14] Of some new red said the the guy owner of Viacom
[00:56:19] Oh, yeah, and it sucked off Brandon Brandon sucked off. He posted he posted a tweet where he it says
[00:56:24] This is the guy Brandon sucked off when he moved off
[00:56:32] Yeah, Chrissy was at the show last night. She's cool as shit
[00:56:34] I'm glad. Oh, can we talk can we uh bully Brandon for a minute?
[00:56:40] Why do you brand up saying he doesn't want his girlfriend to be friends with us?
[00:56:44] I know I never said that I know what I want her to be friends with all of you
[00:56:48] She thinks we're she loved each and every one of our sets. She was at the show longer than she was
[00:56:53] No, she didn't know she was the one that didn't want to want to come to the show
[00:56:56] Well, she came and she loved me putting her on blast eventually came because of don't put her on blast take it
[00:57:01] But she like a man, you know, I don't throw your girl under the bus. It was her. It was her
[00:57:07] I throw your girl under the bus dude. You know, I put on for my boys
[00:57:14] Each individual one of us all had sex with her six times
[00:57:30] This become a metal podcast beast be metal guys. I feel like they do well
[00:57:36] For you're listening to sign of the beast live from Jimmy's garage
[00:57:39] Okay, we're here with the lead vocalist from dying retard
[00:58:02] A summoner red stoned that who's who's the first guy to start singing like that? Oh wait about some new red sounds like
[00:58:09] I would sound like a dog that you walk past his yard
[00:58:11] He played let the bodies at the floor when he got branded a second muffin
[00:58:17] Crying he's like I'm so new to New York and you maybe put on these jeans shorts that are riding by a drowning pool
[00:58:24] Yeah drowning dad. You just funny the the leech singer of disturbed. Oh, yeah
[00:58:29] That's like the Jewish guy that's you're an hello, dark dis my old friend by just the disturbed
[00:58:36] Oh my god, let the body sit the floor just reminded me of that prue in two forever video
[00:58:41] Which one where he's like he has like a fake fight with his dad. Oh that one is so
[00:58:47] That is like such an alcohol. Oh, yeah. Yeah, all of the prue in two forever videos are gone
[00:58:53] I don't know who prue in he had that his big video was like
[00:59:04] David Dreyman the disturbed guy who like loves Israel
[00:59:08] Oh, he's a Zionist he's a complete Zionist and he's like he's without the distar
[00:59:13] Once you take away his soul patch and all the black leather and the band he's like he looks like a fucking like actuary
[00:59:19] Yeah, well, what about you should be a real estate lawyer. Yeah. Oh no all kiss. It's the same situation. It's just an Israeli guy
[00:59:25] Yeah, yeah, well, that's what that's what fucking the disturbed guy is
[00:59:29] He's like if you criticize Israel you should be put in jail
[00:59:35] Well, yeah, that's uh the opposite band of that is um
[00:59:42] Uh, what is the call what happened to Israel? They're really like losing any kind of PR spin that they
[00:59:47] Israel's this you anything this you anything nobody is on her side
[00:59:52] It's like Fox News is in their corner and nobody else gives really well. Yeah, they're now lining themselves with Trump
[00:59:57] They're going hard with Trump. Yeah, really? Yeah, which is gonna be really confusing for the peppers
[01:00:04] Oh, that's the only silver lining of BB now going full alt right is like one of the peppers gonna do about it
[01:00:10] Strange bedfellas, you know strange times we're living in. Yeah, so is this can we buy soda streams now?
[01:00:16] Yeah, so the streams are uh are are are the new balance?
[01:00:21] Soto stream soda stream. Okay, let's do it. Yeah. Well, I just got the Vitamix
[01:00:26] So I'm not how much is soda stream. It's like $90 really. Yeah
[01:00:32] Whatever, but yeah, I don't want to talk about that
[01:00:36] You're not talking about that. Why do you want to talk about it about the thrill? No, but I
[01:00:40] Oh, no, no, I don't care about soda stream. Oh, you don't want to talk about your nuts and yahir. No, BB
[01:00:58] Hey guys, I'm going to the I don't want any of the power series to have any soda
[01:01:07] Guys, I'm gonna kill Palestinian children
[01:01:19] Happy birthday scarlet. Okay. Bye. Bye. Oh, look. This is a bus and it's taking everyone back to gaza
[01:01:40] Yeah, yeah, I don't know anything about Israel now. It seems like they're fucking up. They were crazy on twitter
[01:01:44] Yeah, I used to be an expert on Israel, but not anymore. Yeah, you can't meet them. Yeah. Yeah, why was you?
[01:01:50] My thing is I use my own already says like why even bother my friend. He's my friend. He's uh, it is a really guy who lives in america
[01:01:57] Who Brandon thought was French. She's like this French car just came up to me and said, uh, are you a star from twitter?
[01:02:02] And he like tweeted it out. I was like, thank you guys my friend. Anyway, yo Brandon
[01:02:05] Can you be favorite and pick up that cat turn and put it in your backpack?
[01:02:10] He was like what's with all the Israel stuff on the podcast. I was like, oh, is it bothering you?
[01:02:15] But like you know the joke Nick made about the small targets in the snipers like this is true
[01:02:21] He's like I know Nick was making a joke, but this is true. This is actually
[01:02:31] I actually you know it's funny. I kind of have like more respect for Israel now that they just have to be like openly evil about it
[01:02:38] Right, right, you know when it's like if they can't really frame themselves as victims in that situation anymore
[01:02:42] They'd be like just let us genocide these people
[01:02:45] We want to do it. Okay. There's a couple other things. Yeah, one is that net tan yahoos under corruption investigation is right now
[01:02:52] I was trying to deflect second of all most Israelis are against the settlements as our most Jews in the world
[01:02:58] Yeah, he's a hardline right-wing like psycho. I'm not like defending
[01:03:02] You know, but like clearly there's a nut here this been
[01:03:05] But what he's been able to know to what he's been able to do is get them like a dradel
[01:03:16] Done, I don't want to fucking what do we talk about? I don't know man. I've been hearing about like a two state solution my entire life Tuesday solutions
[01:03:22] I'm 87 years old. Okay, and it's not gonna work. Okay, babe. Okay, so
[01:03:27] Just genocide. It's fixed. You know, it's I feel the same way about the native americans in the United States
[01:03:32] It's like you know people are like well, you know look at all the oppression people face and then then you know
[01:03:38] Which is real but then they say like and how we genocide of the native americans and it's like no
[01:03:44] They're still alive. We're like continuing to oppress them worse than any other like yeah, the minority in the United
[01:03:49] Yeah, right. It's currently going on so it's like we might as well just it's like ripping off a band-aid just get rid of the
[01:04:01] 500 of them left put them out of their misery
[01:04:04] They will build a new museum an even bigger one that's not just in the basement of the fucking bankruptcy office down
[01:04:11] They got a brand new museum. We fuck them so hard. They all have diabetes and alcohol. We've just finished the job
[01:04:19] Okay, then we don't have to hear about the sports team saying anymore
[01:04:23] You get to keep all the names and they were honoring them. Yeah, that's true
[01:04:28] It's kind of dumb that they complain about the sports team's names because that's like literally the only thing keeping them relevant
[01:04:33] People would forget that native americans existed because he weren't for for the Redskins. Come on. There's better casinos Donnie hates them
[01:04:41] I was trying to think of like a group that Donnie didn't like offend
[01:04:46] Yeah, yeah, but you know a non-white male group and I was like, oh, did he say anything about the native americans in these like and then I remember it
[01:04:52] Yeah, he blames them for the trump tajmahal closing in the Atlantic city. It's awesome. Yeah, but the tajmahal is also an Indian casino
[01:04:58] It's just the wrong type of India. Yeah, yeah, I'm funny is it how funny is it that the dogs are like we're gonna start an Indian casino
[01:05:08] I think let's get it wrong. Oh, we went dot instead of feather
[01:05:14] God fucking damnate these indians these red engines
[01:05:19] Oh fuck how are you doing on time? We were done so you can stop when i was getting lunch
[01:05:24] Is it lunch time? I was gonna go until my new rule is we we keep podcasting is all i'm done with my smoothie
[01:05:36] Um an hour and 10. Ah fuck it. Let's stop. That's a good one hour and five. Yeah
[01:05:41] All right. Well, thanks for listening everyone
[01:05:44] When's our next show Adam our next show is the fourth Monday of
[01:05:48] January we'll be sure to let you know the 23rd. Yep. Yeah, me and stop will be on legion of skanks on the fourth
[01:05:55] Let's what if you want to listen to legion of skanks
[01:05:58] Minder that come town is bought has bought out gas digital
[01:06:03] Any anyone of louis's shows if you like louis gomez
[01:06:07] Your fan of him make sure to sign up for our premium episodes
[01:06:11] If you want louis to be able to support his son james
[01:06:13] Because that's the only way louis kids pay is if you buy our premium episodes
[01:06:18] Uh, so uh, yeah, we're doing the mashup mashup show at the stand on the 29th that you want to mean stop great lineup
[01:06:26] Yeah, that's a show. It's a stupid really stupid fucking idea
[01:06:30] You have two comics go on stage at the same time
[01:06:33] Which I think they just stole from rory scovill and john door that was like their bit that they would do on
[01:06:37] Yeah, they did on cone. Yeah, so they stole the idea from them and uh, but then they make comics that aren't good at that
[01:06:43] Go up and do it so me and stop will be going on stage at the same time for some reason
[01:06:49] And but we have like a good rapport. Yeah, it'll be fine. Yeah, just do that whatever you're doing right now with this
[01:06:59] We know you'll pull your dick out we have a problem with you pulling your stomach out
[01:07:03] I'd rather see your dude also by the way like right before I remember right before you did the you start dude my
[01:07:09] Can't move that's new york and you like did the instagram remember like how into like diet and fitness you were you
[01:07:16] You were like going so hard. Yeah, and then you did like the instagram account. He's always been in the diet and fitness
[01:07:23] So he's more like body thoughts just anyone I know um
[01:07:27] I mean i'm trying to get back into it. I'm just trying to fuck
[01:07:29] I just want to feel because I thought I thought I thought like I thought you were done because it's like good for your your brand
[01:07:35] No, no, it's just easier. I just have a real fucking food addiction like I'll just eat like garbage
[01:07:40] And it fucking feels better than doing drugs
[01:07:43] I got love a nice chicken wing and a fucking fried rice and just get a nice coma going
[01:07:49] Finish it off with the fucking Ben and jerry's
[01:07:54] Come on man. What's better than that shit. They really know how to fry up a piece of this one more thing
[01:08:00] Is there another thing to plug? Yeah, I think i'm on red eye at some point
[01:08:04] Oh, yeah, again, just thank you for everyone that came out like the shows are getting better
[01:08:09] Yeah, yeah, shouts out to all the come boys coming out you guys are you guys are animals our fans
[01:08:14] You know they really just a bunch of big team they unlocked the gates of the
[01:08:19] Institutional institution they let our fans out and you guys are a real bunch and
[01:08:24] Also, yeah carolines live show February 21st. We're let's just 22nd 22nd. Yes. Oh really? Yes
[01:08:30] It's the monday. Did you work that out with louis?
[01:08:32] No, oh, what do you mean? Did I work it out with louis? Did you talk? No, because they have something I checked the calendar
[01:08:39] They have something else on the 20 alright. Well, you know louis. So nevermind
[01:08:43] They're actually you know what there might not even be a carolines live show anymore. So
[01:08:46] You know don't come to that unless I change my mind. All right, great. Uh, all right. Well, that's