Search Directory About

Ep. 34 - We Gotta Get Rid Of The TV

Cum Town | Regular | 01/12/2017

[00:00:00] Everyone so i was gonna start the show but we put on she's all that so we're feeling kind of rift out already.
[00:00:07] I don't know how much of an episode this is gonna be but it's starting and we're you know we're already thirteen seconds down.
[00:00:15] Oh yeah dude we can do this yeah just how many more seconds left.
[00:00:18] Let's get a seconds clock going.
[00:00:20] This movie is fourteen minutes long.
[00:00:23] Eventually the show is just gonna be us watching movies and you know mostly silence.
[00:00:28] That would be so fucking tight dude.
[00:00:32] It's nice.
[00:00:32] It's movies I actually want to watch.
[00:00:34] And you go to say something I'm just like just shut the fuck up dude.
[00:00:37] I want to see this.
[00:00:39] Yeah I would love to just not even mystery science theater.
[00:00:42] It's just me like going to the bathroom and asking for clarification on the plot.
[00:00:45] What happened dude?
[00:00:47] Wait what happened?
[00:00:48] Yeah cause you just science theater.
[00:00:50] It's just real science theater.
[00:00:52] I voted for Congo though.
[00:00:54] Yeah.
[00:00:55] Oh Will Menaker is joining us today.
[00:00:57] We have Thiccock Billy.
[00:00:58] Yeah in the mix.
[00:01:00] Why did why did Madger?
[00:01:03] It's true.
[00:01:04] Oh hell yeah.
[00:01:05] They're having me guys.
[00:01:06] Yeah they just saw.
[00:01:07] They had a killer set.
[00:01:08] Wow what all this called.
[00:01:09] She earned the park's love mansion.
[00:01:11] And now we're doing our show.
[00:01:13] Hell yeah dude.
[00:01:14] But with a little twist element we're watching she's all that.
[00:01:18] Yeah we tried to do this with the new Netflix show chasing Cameron.
[00:01:23] Oh dude they're so good.
[00:01:25] That's just a good show.
[00:01:27] So we could do that Cameron Dallas the Vine star.
[00:01:29] He has his own like Netflix series now where he and it was a disaster.
[00:01:35] It was awesome dude.
[00:01:36] We could watch this show.
[00:01:37] All these 11 year old girls are so wet that it just makes they're crying and they're wet
[00:01:41] and they don't understand what's happening to their bodies.
[00:01:44] Cameron's like these sexy six girls.
[00:01:45] The only joke we got out of it was calling it bug chasing Cameron.
[00:01:49] No Cameron Dallas buyers in the club.
[00:01:51] Cameron Dallas buyers.
[00:01:52] Yeah yeah yeah yeah.
[00:01:53] Sponsored by the Podesta group.
[00:01:56] Hell yeah.
[00:01:57] Felix and Brendan and Amber are also here but we only have four microphones.
[00:02:01] They're just chilling.
[00:02:03] They're just chilling.
[00:02:05] Cedar Rapids.
[00:02:07] That's fine of all time dude.
[00:02:09] Gabrielle Union's in this movie.
[00:02:11] I totally forgot looking real good.
[00:02:13] Future wife of Dwayne Wade.
[00:02:15] Gabrielle Union still look good as hell dude.
[00:02:17] She looks the fuck is she wearing on her head.
[00:02:19] She's a little hard of a human.
[00:02:23] For a second I thought that was just some bizarre blossom hat and that very well could
[00:02:28] have been.
[00:02:29] They've already established how arty she is.
[00:02:32] Dude she is so annoying how hot she just is at the beginning of the movie.
[00:02:38] You say that about every woman though.
[00:02:40] That's not true.
[00:02:41] Name a woman.
[00:02:42] I don't know that guy in the background.
[00:02:44] Yeah he's hot.
[00:02:45] He's cute.
[00:02:46] He's not the hottest.
[00:02:47] This guy right here.
[00:02:49] This guy honestly.
[00:02:50] Okay I was doing it a bit earlier but I will look at that guy and I will tell you what I
[00:02:54] could do with him.
[00:02:57] You would fuck any mom or any woman in a movie that's been in a Hollywood movie.
[00:03:02] Almost certainly yeah I think I would.
[00:03:04] What about the mom and Gilbert?
[00:03:05] I'm like that.
[00:03:06] I would tell people like no.
[00:03:08] I like to tell people.
[00:03:09] I can fuck him.
[00:03:10] I would like to tell people like I would totally fuck that girl from the commercial and they're
[00:03:13] like which commercial.
[00:03:14] Just pick any commercial.
[00:03:15] Yeah.
[00:03:16] Because it always holds up.
[00:03:17] Right.
[00:03:18] You know you used to be really hot that girl from the Wendy's commercials from like 10
[00:03:23] years ago.
[00:03:24] The Wendy?
[00:03:25] Yeah.
[00:03:26] Yeah.
[00:03:27] Yeah.
[00:03:28] Not actual Wendy.
[00:03:29] It was the woman in the office you know because they had to get rid of the real Wendy.
[00:03:31] Well they got some UCB red head.
[00:03:33] Yeah yeah.
[00:03:34] I'm all in dude.
[00:03:36] That's my fucking that's my that's my flow from progressive is UCB.
[00:03:40] Of course dude.
[00:03:41] You know the ones that she did with her whole family or her being like let me let loose.
[00:03:45] Let me show what I can do.
[00:03:46] Yeah.
[00:03:47] She's like doing a terrible approach.
[00:03:48] Oh my characters.
[00:03:49] Yeah.
[00:03:50] She makes so much money.
[00:03:53] She's rich as hell.
[00:03:54] Yeah.
[00:03:55] She's insanely rich off that.
[00:03:56] I want to be an insurance.
[00:03:57] That's how you got a we got a court insurance company guys.
[00:03:59] What's his name?
[00:04:00] No you know what we should do?
[00:04:02] We should become the pet boys.
[00:04:05] We should make them like what's it called when they turn them into people when you make
[00:04:10] cartoons people and they're more five from more.
[00:04:13] Well they're already that's like when you make an animal look like a man.
[00:04:16] Right.
[00:04:17] Right.
[00:04:18] When you Roger Rabbit it's called man.
[00:04:20] It's called man.
[00:04:21] It's called the ghost shell.
[00:04:23] What was that fucking movie?
[00:04:26] It's called who framed Roger Rabbit is the movie you're thinking of which by the way is
[00:04:31] one of the top five new art films full time.
[00:04:33] I I actually unironically agree.
[00:04:35] Yeah.
[00:04:36] Yeah.
[00:04:37] No.
[00:04:38] I say that.
[00:04:39] You know fucking Jessica Rabbit come on beat off to a cartoon no problem there but also
[00:04:43] but also but also have looked up cosplay porn of Jessica Rat.
[00:04:49] Yeah there's a porn star that's named Jessica Ratty.
[00:04:51] Yeah she just what's okay now that we're the pet boys.
[00:04:54] Yeah.
[00:04:55] We're also a cartoon call.
[00:04:56] Oh dude we can fuck any cartoon character.
[00:04:57] Yeah I'm going to send I'm going to send a little email over to the pet boys marketing
[00:05:00] from the come town email account.
[00:05:04] We got to figure out schemes to make money boys.
[00:05:06] I think also do you have boys if you ever imagined any of your beloved advertising mascot's
[00:05:11] fucking.
[00:05:12] Check it out we're fucking snap crackling pop you need a muffler bitch.
[00:05:18] We got fucking mufflers.
[00:05:20] Yeah let's go shake down other fucking cartoon characters.
[00:05:23] What the fuck is the pet boy I guess those are probably three guys that existed.
[00:05:27] They're the bro is it the Marx Brothers yeah.
[00:05:30] No they're like they're like cheap rip offs of the Marx Brothers.
[00:05:33] I think there were the three guys that opened the first shop.
[00:05:35] Well one guy looks exactly like fucking it was originally called the pep shop boys the
[00:05:40] pep shop boys.
[00:05:43] Pep Pep sounds what the fuck is this.
[00:05:46] Yeah it's a it's a sort of a barbershop quartet except there's three of them aesthetic right.
[00:05:51] A barbershop three tats yeah exactly.
[00:05:54] Yo this fucking shit is crazy.
[00:05:57] All right yeah we got to try not to pay attention.
[00:05:59] All right.
[00:06:00] Yeah.
[00:06:01] There's a midget over here for some reason is it still high school.
[00:06:04] There's a midget there's two midgets it's art this is an art project.
[00:06:08] This is Freddy Prince Jr. is trying to ingratiate himself to his pigmillion by hanging out.
[00:06:13] They're stopped that's not that wasn't me that wasn't me.
[00:06:16] I'm a little bit I would the brother I would the brother finger.
[00:06:18] I'm a wait for the other Eric weirheim combined.
[00:06:21] I'm with you to bitch.
[00:06:22] Yeah look at that it looks literally like some where I'm no it does not.
[00:06:26] That guy looks nothing like that does look exactly like that.
[00:06:28] That guy looks nothing just a touch of pendulette.
[00:06:31] Yeah the facial.
[00:06:32] I don't really like their magic but I love their politics.
[00:06:37] Yeah not a fan of the magic.
[00:06:39] Well you know they're not good magicians.
[00:06:42] Oh you got a power.
[00:06:44] They're not bad.
[00:06:45] I don't think they're that good.
[00:06:46] No I'm good at magic.
[00:06:47] Do you magic explain?
[00:06:48] David Blaine is the greatest magician of all time.
[00:06:51] David Blaine like he fucking just threw up a frog that's not magic dude he swallowed a
[00:06:55] frog you picked his shittiest trail bitch different of all of the things he's done.
[00:06:59] Yeah it's not shitty dude it's tight.
[00:07:01] Yeah it's not magic though.
[00:07:03] It's bibble.
[00:07:04] You also like he made a fucking frog appear he just swallowed a hard.
[00:07:07] He's got a gazelle.
[00:07:08] He swallowed all the lock picks and regurgitated them and that's how he got out of most of
[00:07:12] all that's why that dumb bitch is dead dude.
[00:07:14] That's why we did he died because he sucked.
[00:07:16] No I died because he got caught by a fist.
[00:07:18] No but David Blaine is trained himself to like swallow a frog and then regurgitated a
[00:07:22] lot.
[00:07:23] Yeah it may not be actual magic but nothing.
[00:07:25] That's my only beef with it.
[00:07:27] He also puts a fucking ice pick through his arm.
[00:07:30] Wait is this the trans guy from the wedding singer?
[00:07:33] Who you?
[00:07:34] This guy on the stage.
[00:07:35] No you are that guy.
[00:07:36] Is that the arcade brother?
[00:07:37] No that's you.
[00:07:38] That's you.
[00:07:39] That's not me.
[00:07:40] I would tell you.
[00:07:41] He's got the same game mouth you do.
[00:07:43] Yeah.
[00:07:44] First of all he's got that big game mouth mouth.
[00:07:46] That you can have.
[00:07:47] That's two sets of lips.
[00:07:50] So you can kiss himself?
[00:07:53] Yeah okay you say that to me but if you say that to a person who's naturally has larger
[00:08:00] lips I'm going to stop that shit.
[00:08:02] Shut up.
[00:08:03] You do have game mouth and you know it.
[00:08:05] There's a certain thing that you got game mouth.
[00:08:08] There's a certain thing that is game mouth like RG3 has game mouth.
[00:08:12] It's wet lips.
[00:08:13] It's big wet lips and it's like it's in mouth.
[00:08:16] Who is it?
[00:08:17] It's always wet.
[00:08:18] Yes dude they look gay I'm serious.
[00:08:20] My friend George has a game mouth.
[00:08:21] You know George?
[00:08:22] Yeah I know George.
[00:08:23] He's got a big gay smile.
[00:08:24] I've kissed him and it was not gay.
[00:08:26] We both kissed him.
[00:08:27] Stop just thinks any man that's more attractive than him is gay.
[00:08:30] Yeah.
[00:08:31] No if he's serious.
[00:08:32] No if any man I want to kiss has game mouth.
[00:08:33] Yeah.
[00:08:34] I have kissed.
[00:08:35] No.
[00:08:36] I stand by my game mouth.
[00:08:37] This is the scene where Freddy Prince Jr. goes on stage at the art show and shows them
[00:08:42] that he can do hacky sack and all the art kids are blown away because there's no way
[00:08:46] any art kids would play hacky sack.
[00:08:50] That's out of the question.
[00:08:51] I told you about that dude I know from Iceland who was the first hacky sack to Iceland.
[00:08:57] Well really?
[00:08:58] Yeah yeah yeah.
[00:08:59] Because it's such a small place.
[00:09:00] What is this station?
[00:09:01] His sister and her boyfriend.
[00:09:02] His sister and her boyfriend like- They still have a statue to him.
[00:09:05] Yeah yeah.
[00:09:06] He's like a god there basically.
[00:09:10] But yeah it's like 200,000 people in Iceland so his sister and her boyfriend went on vacation
[00:09:14] or his sister's boyfriend brought him back a hacky sack.
[00:09:18] He was the first hacky shack in my whole country.
[00:09:21] And he's like a really good artist too.
[00:09:25] He does all these sort of primordial man but like playing basketball and farting and
[00:09:30] stuff.
[00:09:31] He's like this is like a man doing a slam dunk and farting at the same time.
[00:09:38] Like they're like buyers?
[00:09:39] That sounds stupid.
[00:09:40] I went to his show.
[00:09:41] No it's really charming actually.
[00:09:42] I went to his show and then there was this woman that was like so what's your opinion on
[00:09:46] the state of patriarchy?
[00:09:48] I feel like your art says a lot about it.
[00:09:51] He's like no I think that farting is funny.
[00:09:54] And I think that's it.
[00:09:55] Right yeah yeah.
[00:09:56] He like completely killed her question.
[00:09:58] Yeah fuck people.
[00:09:59] Whatever.
[00:10:00] The hacky sack is really fun.
[00:10:01] Do you guys use a hack back in the day?
[00:10:03] Fuck no I did devil sticks.
[00:10:05] Oh.
[00:10:06] Oh my god dude.
[00:10:07] You did poi.
[00:10:08] No I never did any of that shit.
[00:10:10] I was like for a hacky sack was like for like kids who went to boarding school but like
[00:10:14] listened to fish.
[00:10:15] There was a hacky sack was huge where I went to like my community college.
[00:10:19] There was a designated smoking area and people were always playing hacky sack there.
[00:10:22] But there was also devil sticks going on and then often poi.
[00:10:26] I'm a lot of burning man.
[00:10:27] And again poi is just like balls at the end of socks and you spin them around and they
[00:10:31] usually you set the balls on fire.
[00:10:33] Oh it's all like burning man stuff.
[00:10:35] Okay yeah.
[00:10:36] What the fuck is this?
[00:10:38] Why is she got face paint on?
[00:10:40] Why is she have face paint on?
[00:10:41] This is your first inkling that she's hot when her entire face is covered in like kabuki
[00:10:45] makeup.
[00:10:46] Yeah dude she is so hot.
[00:10:49] Wow she's so fire.
[00:10:54] Just take the glasses off you disgusting bitch.
[00:10:57] I hate bitches he can read dude.
[00:11:00] That's a big pet pig.
[00:11:01] The fucking glasses.
[00:11:03] Take them off.
[00:11:05] She's such a slob.
[00:11:06] Oh my god.
[00:11:07] What if the angle was that like he can't date her because she's extremely racist.
[00:11:12] And if I was a Nazi.
[00:11:15] It's like American history.
[00:11:16] Yeah.
[00:11:17] Yeah.
[00:11:18] What do they got you reading in high school these days?
[00:11:21] Well.
[00:11:22] American American teen ex.
[00:11:24] Oh man.
[00:11:26] American history ex is such a stupid movie.
[00:11:28] Yeah it sucks.
[00:11:29] It's so fucking stupid.
[00:11:30] I've never seen it.
[00:11:31] This guy is a hardcore Nazi and then like one nice guy in jail is like what changes
[00:11:36] his mind.
[00:11:37] Yeah because they like talk about basketball he's like yeah magic Johnson is the best
[00:11:40] player he's like no way Larry Bird.
[00:11:43] I also like my favorite rappers Eminem.
[00:11:47] Yeah.
[00:11:48] Yeah.
[00:11:49] Eminem and Yellow Wolf.
[00:11:50] Those are my favorites.
[00:11:51] Yeah.
[00:11:52] Those black eyes Eminem.
[00:11:58] Yeah.
[00:11:59] Fuck.
[00:12:00] Yo Eminem really needs to take down Trump quick.
[00:12:02] You think he will?
[00:12:03] He's the only white white guy that can.
[00:12:06] He's the only guy on our side that can right who Eminem slim shits slim shady right.
[00:12:13] Yeah you're right.
[00:12:14] No keep going with this.
[00:12:15] This sounds good.
[00:12:16] Here's the I think the Democrats should know it's even better at better level as you say
[00:12:19] that ever last is the best for ever house of pain.
[00:12:28] Because of whitey Ford sings the blues you say ever last is the best musical artists of
[00:12:32] all time.
[00:12:33] They should perform at the inauguration ever last.
[00:12:35] How's the picture reunite?
[00:12:36] You jump around.
[00:12:37] Yeah.
[00:12:38] That would be so fucking awesome.
[00:12:41] Yeah.
[00:12:42] You see a man at the liquor store begging for some change.
[00:12:44] You're telling me to get a fucking job.
[00:12:47] There's no safety net for people like you.
[00:12:49] He's like the you know the like someday like you might know what it's really like to be
[00:12:53] called the racist.
[00:12:54] Yeah.
[00:12:55] He's wearing a Pepe mask on the song.
[00:13:00] Well I mean I've been having this whole like I've had this fantasy now about the inauguration
[00:13:05] that like he can't get any A list acts but there's certainly a lot of there's like some
[00:13:09] B list acts you could definitely.
[00:13:11] Yeah.
[00:13:12] Yeah.
[00:13:13] And nine in.
[00:13:14] That'll be so tight.
[00:13:15] People were asking they want they want some explanation of Dan Nynan because he's come
[00:13:19] up on the show.
[00:13:20] Right.
[00:13:21] The reason I don't really talk about him is because he's it's honestly fucking boring
[00:13:23] at this point.
[00:13:24] Right.
[00:13:25] You know I mean Dan Nynan was funny three and a half years ago.
[00:13:27] Yeah.
[00:13:28] He's still funny.
[00:13:29] That's funny if he's new to you but you know it's a limited gimmick.
[00:13:32] So that's like I said I'm glad we spent 20 minutes talking about him when our show.
[00:13:37] Yeah.
[00:13:38] Well that's I mean it's point for me because I've known Dan for like five years.
[00:13:41] Yeah.
[00:13:42] I just found out about him.
[00:13:43] Yeah.
[00:13:44] You know people were asking about it and so Dan is this half Indian half Japanese comedian
[00:13:49] that was born in 1952.
[00:13:51] Where does he buy?
[00:13:52] Where does he buy?
[00:13:54] Where does he buy?
[00:13:55] Sushi.
[00:13:56] It's 711.
[00:13:57] Yeah.
[00:13:58] Why?
[00:13:59] Oh because he's half Japanese.
[00:14:00] He's half Indian.
[00:14:01] Yeah.
[00:14:02] Is he he's red engine or is he?
[00:14:03] Did you ever hear Joe Robinson going off about that bit on the Robin Joe show?
[00:14:07] No.
[00:14:08] No.
[00:14:09] He's just like you know they don't sell sushi.
[00:14:11] Yeah.
[00:14:12] They don't sell it like Walgreens but they don't have it 711.
[00:14:16] Does he have hearing aids on?
[00:14:18] Yeah.
[00:14:19] McCully Colkin's little brother's got hearing aids in this movie.
[00:14:21] That's deep.
[00:14:22] Oh she look good.
[00:14:23] She uses me to add I'm ugly.
[00:14:24] Why did she suddenly seven years younger than she was in the last scene?
[00:14:29] So Dan Einen is a old comedian.
[00:14:32] He's an old guy.
[00:14:33] He started doing open mics in DC and probably like 2005 and then sort of rubbed people the
[00:14:39] wrong way and eventually just sort of he found it that the best path for career for him was
[00:14:45] going to be to lie to people, lie to clubs and bookers and say that he's like so and
[00:14:50] so is opener or whatever.
[00:14:52] He used to he just like got Robert Kimmel's schedule and would call clubs when as soon
[00:14:56] as they booked shimmel and like be like hey this is Rob Shimmel's agent.
[00:14:59] I'm trying to get the booking information for his opening opener Dan Einen and the clubs
[00:15:03] would be like well what do you mean is opener and then he'd be like oh yeah no he has an
[00:15:07] opener that he brings with him that has to be there so if you could get the hotel information
[00:15:10] and then he would book Dan and after like a couple months of that I guess yeah shimmel
[00:15:16] was like who the fuck is this guy you know why do they keep booking him and so Dan lost
[00:15:23] that and then he moved on to the Russell Peter I'm David Brenner is opening.
[00:15:28] Well apparently I don't have this true or not but I'm sure it is going to end but when Robert
[00:15:33] Shimmel died Dan emailed Shimmel's brother and was like yeah Robert was a fucking asshole
[00:15:40] and a piece of shit.
[00:15:41] What?
[00:15:42] That's terrible.
[00:15:43] Oh yeah Dan's an associate path he's a fucking piece of shit.
[00:15:46] Well he also said that Russell Peters yeah you know the Russell Peters saying we're you
[00:15:50] know I think Russell talked about it on what the fuck or something.
[00:15:54] Dan also tried to pay like five thousand dollars to have Mark Marin have him on what
[00:15:59] the fuck.
[00:16:00] He's like a bride his way on to it.
[00:16:03] What the fuck where he reads the letter and he doesn't say Dan's name but yeah yeah I
[00:16:05] am a corporate comedian I've made more money this year than you will make in your entire
[00:16:09] life.
[00:16:10] Jesus yeah yeah yeah and you're too much of a coward to have me on your pot.
[00:16:14] Yes so my my exposure to Dan was through Joe Robinson I guess and like Joe was doing
[00:16:20] that Kurt Schackleford hightroom and you know he meets Dan and Dan was like hosting and
[00:16:26] Dan's talking about you know I make three hundred thousand dollars a year doing stand-up and then
[00:16:29] like you know Joe's like then why are you doing a ten dollar spot right right in the lobby
[00:16:34] of a hotel you know like that doesn't make any sense.
[00:16:37] Well that's right at the higher.
[00:16:38] Yeah yeah yeah it's a fifty dollar spot thank you.
[00:16:41] All right well so then fucking Dan because he's super defensive is like fuck Joe Robinson
[00:16:47] fuck Rob Marahaha here's a picture of me in my Tesla here's me in the Acella waiting
[00:16:51] room I don't know why he thinks that's a brag that he shows up too early for his train.
[00:16:55] It's not like a flight there's no security.
[00:16:57] Yeah just go there and get on the fucking train and he goes there hang out in the clubhouse
[00:17:03] with no one else by the way.
[00:17:05] Just a little yeah.
[00:17:06] Also if you if you shit talk Dan I'll put you on his enemies list and he'll just email
[00:17:10] you constantly.
[00:17:11] He really hates a G.L. or J.L. uh common.
[00:17:15] Yeah damn despises him so he'll bring him and Josh Homer up all the time as guys he's
[00:17:22] doing better.
[00:17:23] Dude all right so are we gonna talk about Dan.
[00:17:27] Yeah we're talking I'm just looking at the TV dude it's not my fault.
[00:17:30] What's your name?
[00:17:31] The movie with Shittis on this fucking screen and I'm supposed to pay attention.
[00:17:33] Rachel Lee cook out some jumbo yum yums.
[00:17:36] She does dude it distracted anyway.
[00:17:38] They did dude that's the first unsheathing of her titties.
[00:17:41] It's a big moment in the movie.
[00:17:43] Damn she is fucking hot dude.
[00:17:45] All right Nick all right.
[00:17:46] I've yes back to Dan Nynan.
[00:17:49] I'm only doing it because people laugh.
[00:17:52] I preface this with I don't give a shit about Danny.
[00:17:54] No I just look all I'm saying is got to be mad if I'm at if I look at titties every once
[00:17:59] in a while.
[00:18:00] Yeah I get it.
[00:18:02] Hey you know it's a it's a PG 13 movie.
[00:18:05] Pretty fucking saucy I don't understand how a 30 year old man.
[00:18:09] Come on first of all bitch I'll be able to be a cup breast and they're not a cup.
[00:18:14] They're fucking big old titties and you know what even if they were a cups what's up if
[00:18:18] you got some GCA cups out there I'm with it as well.
[00:18:20] No one is going to fuck you.
[00:18:22] You can look at the gorilla.
[00:18:24] And you want raindrop drink.
[00:18:26] I'm trying to look some gorilla pussy dude.
[00:18:29] You know gorillas have like abnormally small dicks.
[00:18:31] That is true.
[00:18:32] They have like well I guess it is normal for gorillas but they have like three centimeter
[00:18:35] long dicks.
[00:18:36] No it's admirable because they're the they have like the biggest disparity between the
[00:18:39] size of the animal and the size of their penis.
[00:18:41] Yeah.
[00:18:42] So is that the gorilla mindset?
[00:18:44] Yeah.
[00:18:45] It's not an extremely small day.
[00:18:48] Armadillos have four inch dicks.
[00:18:52] Whoa.
[00:18:53] Which is the size of them.
[00:18:55] That's a big ass dick.
[00:18:57] Damn dude.
[00:18:58] That's average size.
[00:18:59] No I kind of want to go out there and fuck armadillo to prove it wrong.
[00:19:07] To establish dominance over.
[00:19:09] Have you ever seen an Argentinian duck?
[00:19:11] An Argentinian duck.
[00:19:12] They have that like corkscrew penis.
[00:19:13] Well they have like nine inches long.
[00:19:15] Really?
[00:19:16] Yeah.
[00:19:17] It looks like an umbilical cord.
[00:19:18] It's like scorpion from Mortal Kombat.
[00:19:20] Yeah.
[00:19:21] Get over here.
[00:19:22] I wish I could do that with my dick deed.
[00:19:26] Just fucking.
[00:19:27] And that would be right.
[00:19:28] Ducks have the.
[00:19:29] Hey.
[00:19:30] Ducks.
[00:19:31] That would be a consensual.
[00:19:32] No it would be consensual.
[00:19:34] Ducks have the cloaca.
[00:19:35] They have the one hole policy.
[00:19:37] What's that for shitting and pissing and fucking fucking means whatever gender you identify
[00:19:42] as you can always fuck the duck.
[00:19:45] It's true.
[00:19:46] That's good to know dude.
[00:19:47] It's a real target policy.
[00:19:49] I'm trying to get all up in that cloaca dude.
[00:19:53] Yeah pigs have a weird dick.
[00:19:56] I remember watching a video of a pig fucking a woman one time.
[00:20:01] It was on e-fucked.
[00:20:03] What?
[00:20:04] I guess we're talking about this.
[00:20:05] What is e-fucked?
[00:20:06] E-fucked to us.
[00:20:07] It's like really bad.
[00:20:09] F-U-K-T dot com.
[00:20:11] Yeah.
[00:20:12] So it's still around but.
[00:20:13] It's not what it used to be anymore.
[00:20:14] It was scary porn stuff because you were talking about it on the use on that one.
[00:20:19] A guy just fucking a blowfish.
[00:20:20] Yeah yeah yeah.
[00:20:21] That was my favorite video on there.
[00:20:23] It's well it's two women in bed and they're shoving eels in their pussies and then it kind
[00:20:27] of like tracks right and then you just see a guy next to the bed and he's just loving
[00:20:32] his like a dick in this big rock fish's mouth.
[00:20:35] Aren't they quite poisonous though?
[00:20:37] Yeah but only if you eat them.
[00:20:39] Oh okay.
[00:20:40] Yeah they're not poisonous.
[00:20:41] They're not venomous.
[00:20:42] Okay okay.
[00:20:43] The best one is the fat virgin and the two porn stars and then they take out his pathetic
[00:20:47] penis and then one of the porn stars gives him literally one suck and he just starts
[00:20:53] extremely.
[00:20:54] That's awesome.
[00:20:55] Just starts Geyser and all of that.
[00:20:57] Yeah.
[00:20:58] It's really.
[00:20:59] The pig one was great because I didn't know.
[00:21:01] It's very funny.
[00:21:02] The pig's dick looks like it's tail which is what's it's always surprises me when I think
[00:21:06] about like if I was going to think of a funny way to draw a pig's dick without knowing
[00:21:10] what it was.
[00:21:11] I'd be like yeah I'd be the tail.
[00:21:14] And then you see a pig's dick and it's the tail and it's just sort of you know it makes
[00:21:18] me question like you know evolution or if there is some kind of intelligent design that
[00:21:24] that would happen.
[00:21:25] No it's a good bit.
[00:21:26] What's that?
[00:21:27] Yeah that would be a good bit to design a pig's dick.
[00:21:30] Right yeah it doesn't make sense why that animal would have a dick that looks like that
[00:21:33] and other animal stones.
[00:21:35] So how did the how did the woman like it?
[00:21:37] Oh she had to wear a burlap sack on her back because the pigs will scratch and bite the
[00:21:41] fuck out of you.
[00:21:42] Oh god.
[00:21:43] But you know what I guarantee is you know she's on a couple of sitcoms now.
[00:21:48] She's a real work you know mom I just need one more check and I swear things are really
[00:21:55] working out here in Santa Monica.
[00:21:57] We've got really cool roommates and I've got a couple of short films.
[00:22:01] She's like Lauren's Fishburne's daughter remember that.
[00:22:03] She did porn she's like I'm going to turn into acting.
[00:22:05] I'm going to transition to acting.
[00:22:07] Well Sasha Gray tried doing that and that's a real movie right?
[00:22:10] She was in a movie that was directed by Brett or written by Breddy Stinellis and Paul Schrader.
[00:22:15] Yeah apparently there's a piece of shit.
[00:22:17] No she wasn't in that.
[00:22:18] She was in the rounder.
[00:22:19] She was in the rounder.
[00:22:20] I was in the male porn star.
[00:22:21] Yeah yeah yeah.
[00:22:22] Ronda Rousey in the last fast movie was so fucking bad at acting and I feel like she's
[00:22:29] she's in the entourage movie.
[00:22:30] She thinks she's going to have an acting career and it's just she's dying.
[00:22:33] She needs one.
[00:22:34] She got a shit fucked up.
[00:22:35] What happened with that she got knocked out.
[00:22:38] Ronda Rousey who's a turtle's girlfriend.
[00:22:41] Why do you have to have a cool way to say it?
[00:22:44] That's how you say it.
[00:22:45] No it isn't you fucking bitch and you know it.
[00:22:46] It's a South African shut up.
[00:22:48] It's a South African.
[00:22:49] Just say your fucking name.
[00:22:51] Ronda Rousey was say Rousey bitch.
[00:22:53] Yeah you're not even getting it wrong.
[00:22:54] You want to have your own person.
[00:22:55] Say Rousey bitch.
[00:22:56] I've heard name is Ronda Rousey.
[00:22:59] Ronda Rousey.
[00:23:02] Ronda Rousey.
[00:23:03] What did you say you're saying your cone.
[00:23:09] Yeah it's Roy Roy Kuns.
[00:23:11] Roy Kuns nephew is what about around around around around around around around around.
[00:23:14] She was in the entourage movie and she had a very romantic plot line with a turtle.
[00:23:18] She fucked her.
[00:23:19] Yeah it was very romantic.
[00:23:20] Do you see it?
[00:23:21] She was so bad in that that fast movie.
[00:23:22] I really doubt you'll have any kind of acting career.
[00:23:24] Granted I'm wrong about literally everything.
[00:23:26] Anytime I've ever tried to predict anything I was wrong about it.
[00:23:29] The other one with the exception of consumer electronics.
[00:23:34] I've been pretty right about those trends over the last ten years.
[00:23:37] There's an MMA lady Gina Caron.
[00:23:39] What's her name?
[00:23:40] Carono.
[00:23:41] Gina Carono.
[00:23:42] She's been in a couple movies and she's high.
[00:23:44] She was in a K-wire directed by Steven Soderber.
[00:23:47] Yep.
[00:23:48] She's in the name of the world.
[00:23:49] Sasha Gray in the girlfriend experience.
[00:23:52] Sasha Gray I don't really see her having much of a career in acting.
[00:23:56] No.
[00:23:57] She's in a couple of other movies.
[00:23:58] Yeah I know.
[00:23:59] She's probably done better than most.
[00:24:03] I think she has a record label now or something.
[00:24:06] That's true.
[00:24:07] Tracy Lawrence is the best actor porn crossover is clearly Mr. Sylvester.
[00:24:13] Slice Stallone baby.
[00:24:15] The Italian Stallion.
[00:24:17] Him and Frank Stallone by the way.
[00:24:18] I followed him both on Instagram.
[00:24:20] They both got to go to New Year's Eve at Mar-a-Lago with the Trump family.
[00:24:24] My family.
[00:24:25] What?
[00:24:26] Yeah, yeah.
[00:24:29] Frank Stallone.
[00:24:30] Follow him on Instagram by the way.
[00:24:31] I definitely will.
[00:24:32] It's love.
[00:24:33] It's Donald Trump.
[00:24:34] It's private.
[00:24:35] He loves Donald Trump.
[00:24:36] That's awesome.
[00:24:37] The best is the picture of the Instagram of Sly Frank and Trump.
[00:24:40] Is they're all doing like boxing fists?
[00:24:42] Like, but so this is just played a boxer in a movie.
[00:24:46] Like they're not actual boxers but they like kind of feel like they are.
[00:24:49] I feel like the only way Frank Stallone should be allowed to tweet is by writing on his own
[00:24:54] headshots that are left in Italian restaurants.
[00:24:56] And that's the biggest exposure to social media.
[00:24:59] Oh, this is unveiling by the way.
[00:25:00] This is where she's talking about.
[00:25:01] Oh, yeah.
[00:25:02] Before we realized that she's hot for the first time.
[00:25:03] Sixpence none the richer.
[00:25:04] Kiss me.
[00:25:05] Hell yeah.
[00:25:06] Four foot seven.
[00:25:07] She looks better.
[00:25:08] She's a little better.
[00:25:09] She's too better at being overalls in glasses.
[00:25:11] Yeah.
[00:25:12] She looks generically hot now.
[00:25:14] I like indie chicks.
[00:25:15] Yeah, me too.
[00:25:16] Why is the whole family there?
[00:25:17] Isn't that his family?
[00:25:19] No, it's her family, I think.
[00:25:20] That's a comedy.
[00:25:21] It's his family.
[00:25:22] Do you see that part?
[00:25:23] She's part of it where she flips trips.
[00:25:25] Yeah.
[00:25:26] Everyone's like nice.
[00:25:27] She's still retarded there.
[00:25:28] Yeah.
[00:25:29] She still doesn't know how to walk downstairs.
[00:25:31] This movie was obviously Paradid in not another teen movie which starred the now-currant Captain
[00:25:37] America.
[00:25:38] One of the biggest fucking movie stars in the world came from a parody of this movie.
[00:25:42] That requires acting though.
[00:25:44] What?
[00:25:45] That's not like a crazy transition.
[00:25:46] It was an acting one.
[00:25:48] It was funny.
[00:25:49] You know, and really the only guy to get out of like, you know, any kind of like sports
[00:25:53] arena into acting and do really well as the rock.
[00:25:56] Yeah, because the rock's charming as hell dude.
[00:25:58] I was saying about this the other day, like the rock is the only, he's the only thing
[00:26:01] America has going for us cinematically.
[00:26:03] Right, right.
[00:26:04] Like there's no other action stars.
[00:26:05] Like all the Star Wars movies, those are all British people.
[00:26:07] Right.
[00:26:08] The original Star Wars, at least they were American, right?
[00:26:10] Right.
[00:26:11] That's all gone.
[00:26:12] It's the rock and Vin Diesel are like the only like, American movie stars.
[00:26:15] Absolutely.
[00:26:16] And the rock smokes him too.
[00:26:17] Yeah, I mean, yeah.
[00:26:18] Yeah, I mean, Wahlberg's hanging on but he's too old now.
[00:26:21] And he's not on that level though either.
[00:26:23] The rock is something special about him dude.
[00:26:25] But yeah, who do we have?
[00:26:26] Is there anybody even coming up?
[00:26:28] The rock's uniquely shining.
[00:26:29] Tatum fight.
[00:26:30] No, no.
[00:26:31] Not changing.
[00:26:32] It's a pretty boy.
[00:26:33] I guess fucking what's his face?
[00:26:35] It's in all the Guardian shit that everyone tries.
[00:26:37] Oh Chris Pratt.
[00:26:38] He's not, he's sort of like, he's just too like, uh, rock is like, is good humor about
[00:26:44] like being an action star.
[00:26:45] But like Chris Pratt is just too like self referential.
[00:26:48] Yeah.
[00:26:49] And the jokes that he doesn't belong to.
[00:26:52] Chris Pratt just does Seth Rogan's jokes.
[00:26:53] Right.
[00:26:54] In a hot or whatever.
[00:26:55] Everybody does, you know, and like all the commercials now just use Seth Rogan sense
[00:26:58] of humor and it's fucking annoying.
[00:27:00] And it like has penetrated so much of like screenwriting like the force awakens when
[00:27:06] you know, what's Adam Driver's character's name?
[00:27:11] Darth, Darth, the fuck.
[00:27:13] Yeah, Darth girls.
[00:27:15] He destroys that whole village and then Oscar Isaac's like, you know, they've captured
[00:27:20] him and then they're looking at each other and then Oscar Isaac's like, so do like I
[00:27:25] talk now or you talk or whatever.
[00:27:28] And it's supposed to be this comedic moment and it's like, just shut the fuck up.
[00:27:31] That's like so stale that well, they're just trying to make him Hanso in all those movies.
[00:27:36] Everyone has to be the same.
[00:27:37] It's like he's supposed to be like the wise ass.
[00:27:39] Yeah, but there was a cliche way to go about it.
[00:27:42] It's not a funny line.
[00:27:43] Like the other like there's a scene with like the fast bender could be he's not actually
[00:27:50] he's not American.
[00:27:51] He's not American.
[00:27:52] He's German Irish.
[00:27:53] He's got a huge dick.
[00:27:54] Have you seen that?
[00:27:55] Yeah, nice bad.
[00:27:56] Any fucking shame where he can't suck his fucking.
[00:27:59] Okay, I hated that movie.
[00:28:00] Well, it's hated it.
[00:28:01] I've never seen the movie, but I hear he fucks a lot in it.
[00:28:03] No, he doesn't.
[00:28:04] I went in expecting it to be just a nonstop.
[00:28:07] No, you don't fuck that much.
[00:28:08] He really doesn't.
[00:28:09] Don't you fucking see that guy?
[00:28:10] You see that.
[00:28:11] I did.
[00:28:12] I did.
[00:28:13] I did.
[00:28:14] That was the moment in the movie where they're trying to show you like how desperate and
[00:28:16] like he based his life.
[00:28:17] He's like what?
[00:28:18] He's gay now.
[00:28:19] Oh my God.
[00:28:20] So, what we say about.
[00:28:21] What we saw, we went last week.
[00:28:29] We all went to go see the Boston bombing movie.
[00:28:31] Oh, hell yeah.
[00:28:32] I haven't seen you.
[00:28:34] And we're like, it's now the third movie that he's done with Peter Berg that is just
[00:28:38] like where he it's like all based on like some sort of disaster or atrocity that's
[00:28:42] happened like very recently.
[00:28:44] Oh yeah.
[00:28:45] Like they started with like there is the lone survivor movie.
[00:28:47] Hell yeah.
[00:28:48] And the deep water.
[00:28:49] That was a good movie.
[00:28:50] Lone survivor I fucked with.
[00:28:51] I saw the deep water horizon movie too, which is like a more cinematic disaster than the
[00:28:55] Boston bombing, which was like two pressure cookers exploding in a marathon.
[00:29:01] So I was going to add in about this the other day.
[00:29:02] Like I think they should continue with this trend.
[00:29:05] Oh my God.
[00:29:06] And my idea for the next Peter Berg Mark Wahlberg property is just the Pulse nightclub shooting.
[00:29:11] And it's either Wahlberg go for Oscar glory and play a gay Latin man who survives against
[00:29:19] all odds or one of the SWAT team guys who's like, we got to save these gays.
[00:29:24] Yeah, yeah.
[00:29:25] It's got to be a she's a homophobic SWAT team guy.
[00:29:30] Yeah.
[00:29:31] And then he saves everyone in the nightclub.
[00:29:33] Oh yeah.
[00:29:34] And he's like, do you pressure the movie where he's like going up in Boston?
[00:29:37] I didn't think gay people were humans and I would attack them on Sunday.
[00:29:40] But I know that you know, this is America.
[00:29:43] Yeah.
[00:29:44] Have you ever seen him on inside the actors studio where he talks about that assault?
[00:29:47] No, no, I saw it like he's hang years ago.
[00:29:50] Yeah.
[00:29:51] And he sort of just laughs it off.
[00:29:52] James Lipton or whatever.
[00:29:53] James Lipton.
[00:29:54] Oh, James Lipton is the king, dude.
[00:29:56] He's so good.
[00:29:57] And he talks about assaulting that Vietnamese guy.
[00:30:00] He briefly mentions it.
[00:30:01] Yeah.
[00:30:02] And he just.
[00:30:03] What does he say?
[00:30:04] I don't know what I was doing.
[00:30:05] That's where I learned about that.
[00:30:07] That is like, you know, he had like a violent, you know, past or whatever.
[00:30:10] And you watch it and you're like, what the f- shouldn't he be in jail?
[00:30:13] Nah, dude.
[00:30:14] Wait, didn't you say that Kanye when he got in that car accident that like made him
[00:30:19] face this?
[00:30:20] Oh yeah.
[00:30:21] Kanye fell asleep.
[00:30:22] First of all, he was selfishly pursuing this production career.
[00:30:25] Yeah.
[00:30:26] Yeah.
[00:30:27] And uh, fucking fell asleep while driving because he was, you know, spending all his
[00:30:30] time in the studio.
[00:30:32] And drifts in oncoming traffic.
[00:30:34] What do you mean selfishly though?
[00:30:36] Any creative pursuit itself.
[00:30:37] He was working hard.
[00:30:38] He could just go have a regular job.
[00:30:39] He came from like an upper middle class background.
[00:30:41] He worked at the gap.
[00:30:42] Dude, he was a once in a generation talent.
[00:30:44] He would actually be robbing all of us by not pursuing a music career.
[00:30:47] All right.
[00:30:48] It's still a selfish pursuit.
[00:30:50] So he would actually be making collages like the lead in rachel league.
[00:30:55] Yeah.
[00:30:56] So he fell asleep while driving like crosses in the oncoming traffic and fucking just,
[00:31:03] uh, you get in a front inclusion with some cab driver and then was like, you know, uh,
[00:31:09] uh, uh, lawyer up and made it so that he didn't have to pay the guy anything and like destroyed
[00:31:13] this guy's life and his business.
[00:31:15] That's terrible.
[00:31:16] And then, and then he, that, that accident and like through the wire, right.
[00:31:21] That was like the first single that, you know, off of the college shop.
[00:31:24] Yeah.
[00:31:26] And the rest is history.
[00:31:27] Yeah.
[00:31:28] And it was because he destroyed that poor, I'm assuming Pakistani man's life.
[00:31:32] I don't know, dude.
[00:31:33] I won't have it.
[00:31:34] I hit you Kanye.
[00:31:35] And that man was a, you should say Diki's father.
[00:31:38] You know, she has no idea.
[00:31:43] It's sort of like a gangs of New York situation.
[00:31:45] Like a reverse.
[00:31:46] I don't remember the topic.
[00:31:48] I don't remember traffic.
[00:31:50] Yeah.
[00:31:51] Yeah.
[00:31:52] That was a good.
[00:31:53] Now you want to talk about it.
[00:31:54] I don't remember the traffic.
[00:31:55] I like traffic.
[00:31:56] You like traffic?
[00:31:57] I like Chicago too.
[00:31:58] They're like that either.
[00:31:59] I like Chicago because it was just like, I started watching.
[00:32:01] I'm like, oh, it's just traffic again.
[00:32:03] Right.
[00:32:04] No, but no, what's stupid about traffic?
[00:32:06] I never saw traffic.
[00:32:07] It's got a good cast, right?
[00:32:08] Like that whole soap out with like Michael Douglas's daughter where she like, she like
[00:32:12] Snorts Coke once and then like in the movie a week later, she's literally like getting
[00:32:18] down in a crack house.
[00:32:20] It's like, this, this doesn't happen.
[00:32:22] Yeah.
[00:32:23] It does.
[00:32:24] I mean, when you have to like, that was great.
[00:32:26] Yeah.
[00:32:27] There's not enough time to develop that.
[00:32:29] Just that scene though.
[00:32:30] The ass.
[00:32:31] Yeah.
[00:32:32] Oh, you're not.
[00:32:33] You're welcome.
[00:32:34] Just that when he tells him.
[00:32:36] Only that scene is good.
[00:32:37] I love it.
[00:32:38] I love the piece David was the voice of the US Navy.
[00:32:42] Anytime those commercials would come on, Navy, accelerate your life.
[00:32:47] Ass to ass.
[00:32:48] He has a great voice.
[00:32:50] Yeah.
[00:32:51] Yeah.
[00:32:52] He's one of my favorites, but you can't.
[00:32:54] I could never see those Navy commercials.
[00:32:56] I know.
[00:32:57] This is aircraft carriers without thinking about him making German promise.
[00:33:00] You more before it's six a.m.
[00:33:02] You do all day.
[00:33:04] I'm not taking it out for ass.
[00:33:06] Fuck dude.
[00:33:07] What a line.
[00:33:08] I'm not taking it out for air.
[00:33:11] Jesus Christ.
[00:33:12] Oh man.
[00:33:13] That fucking mischievous ass smiley as what he tells me they have to go ass to ass.
[00:33:21] Yeah.
[00:33:22] He is the perfect like fun villain.
[00:33:25] Yeah.
[00:33:26] I was just saying I want to watch dead presidents again.
[00:33:28] He said that.
[00:33:29] That's great.
[00:33:30] I love that movie.
[00:33:31] I love that movie.
[00:33:32] It's cool.
[00:33:33] The guy, what's his name?
[00:33:34] Bo Keem Woodbine.
[00:33:35] He's great.
[00:33:36] Yeah.
[00:33:37] He's great and he's in Fargo and he just doesn't age.
[00:33:39] He's one of those weird people that doesn't age at all.
[00:33:42] Yeah dude.
[00:33:43] He's been in a movie since like.
[00:33:45] Yeah.
[00:33:46] Well more so than normal.
[00:33:47] Yeah.
[00:33:48] Yeah.
[00:33:49] No, he looks great.
[00:33:50] Yeah.
[00:33:51] He's been that.
[00:33:52] He's looked like that since like the early 80s.
[00:33:54] Gabrielle Union.
[00:33:55] She's in this movie.
[00:33:56] She looks exactly the point of saying.
[00:33:57] Is that how old he is Bo Keem Woodbine?
[00:33:58] He's pretty old.
[00:33:59] Yeah.
[00:34:00] He's got to be in his late 40s.
[00:34:01] Who's this guy?
[00:34:02] Who's he look like?
[00:34:03] The dude on, he's in Fargo right now.
[00:34:04] He's in Fargo.
[00:34:05] He's awesome.
[00:34:06] He's a Kansas City gang member.
[00:34:07] Yeah.
[00:34:08] I like that he got a lot of note for that character in Fargo because he was awesome.
[00:34:12] Yeah.
[00:34:13] I've always liked him.
[00:34:14] Dude, that show was great.
[00:34:15] It really was.
[00:34:16] That was one of the only shows I really enjoyed.
[00:34:18] Season two is a little bit better than season one, but I liked him both.
[00:34:21] Yeah.
[00:34:22] I thought they were both great.
[00:34:23] I love Billy Bob, but I thought his kind of, his plot line was a little too Jason born
[00:34:27] for me.
[00:34:28] It was like he was just too good at Karate and knowing which door to open and stuff like
[00:34:32] that.
[00:34:33] But the second season I thought was, was awesome.
[00:34:35] I liked him both.
[00:34:37] I didn't see fun.
[00:34:38] Matt's Adam's film TV reviews.
[00:34:40] TV Guide.
[00:34:41] TV Guide.
[00:34:42] I don't watch any new, I was just watching RuPaul's Drag Race for the first time.
[00:34:45] That shit is awesome, dude.
[00:34:46] But I don't watch any like good TV, except the Sopranos which I've been watching.
[00:34:50] Well, you started watching fucking the Clayton Dallas, what's it called?
[00:34:56] Cameron Dallas.
[00:34:57] Wait, I want to know more about this show.
[00:34:59] He's literally, he's like a Vine team.
[00:35:01] It's like a sexy show.
[00:35:02] Here's the setup.
[00:35:03] So Cameron Dallas is one of these Vine kids.
[00:35:06] He's actually originally an Instagram kid.
[00:35:07] Was he in the Vine apartment in L.A.?
[00:35:09] No, no, no.
[00:35:10] He was part of this thing called Magcon, which was put together by this older man that was
[00:35:16] like, obviously, he clearly feels like he missed the boat on being a Vine boy, because
[00:35:20] he's in his late 30s and he could have been a pretty boy when he was, he was like one
[00:35:26] of these guys.
[00:35:27] He's their pimp.
[00:35:28] Yeah, so this guy, he started this thing, Magcon, where he gets all these boys together
[00:35:32] and parades the boys in front of young girl.
[00:35:35] Yeah, yeah.
[00:35:36] Yeah, yeah.
[00:35:37] Yeah, yeah.
[00:35:38] He's like the Lou Pearlman, the Blimp entrepreneur.
[00:35:40] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:35:41] He's like sort of Lou Pearlman meets Justin Bieber's dad.
[00:35:44] Yeah.
[00:35:45] Yeah.
[00:35:46] He ever see pictures of Justin Bieber's dad.
[00:35:48] He's like a fucking monster energy drink, kind of like a real federal line vibe.
[00:35:52] Tatted up.
[00:35:53] Yeah, K-fed type dude.
[00:35:54] Yeah.
[00:35:55] That's great.
[00:35:56] Yeah, he's a pimp.
[00:35:57] So he was pimping out the children.
[00:35:59] Yeah.
[00:36:00] The children got upset about it because they weren't getting enough money, so they stopped
[00:36:04] doing the Magcon and then they went with another guy that pimped them out even harder
[00:36:08] and like exploited them even more.
[00:36:10] So they went back to their old pimp.
[00:36:11] They went back to their original pimp and they said, look, we've always been your bottom
[00:36:14] dollar bitch.
[00:36:15] You know, we want to kiss the ring.
[00:36:18] We want to turn that ass out.
[00:36:19] But then they fought me a night daddy.
[00:36:21] They, by doing grapevine, I'll put that boy pussy on the stroll for you.
[00:36:31] So yeah, then they go on like a European tour and it's basically their exploits.
[00:36:35] You know what I mean?
[00:36:36] It's just like, well, it's just like, Cameron Dallas got equity in this Magcon thing.
[00:36:40] So now he's the boss of Magcon.
[00:36:42] Yeah.
[00:36:43] He's like, yeah, now I'm like a fine star.
[00:36:44] And also a CEO.
[00:36:45] So like I got 100, you know, I have a lot of pressure in my life.
[00:36:50] Yeah.
[00:36:51] And his mom is just like a just, oh yeah, they show these kids backgrounds and it's like,
[00:36:56] they are, they don't, you know, they have kind of tragic backgrounds.
[00:36:58] It's like, my mom was a drug addict and my dad was the guy that got her addicted to drugs.
[00:37:03] And so I deliver my green, my green mom, green, green pop, my coupon peepaw.
[00:37:07] And I was raised by pee pee and poo poo.
[00:37:10] It's, it's chilling to learn the, the pathos.
[00:37:12] It's behind jokes about your mom not having to hurt the, you know, bagel bites ready.
[00:37:17] Yeah.
[00:37:18] Yeah.
[00:37:19] Yeah.
[00:37:20] They all look, she was in recovery.
[00:37:22] Yeah.
[00:37:23] Yeah.
[00:37:24] They all look like a sort of like feminized to their all.
[00:37:28] They're all very beautiful.
[00:37:29] They're sexy little boys.
[00:37:30] Yeah.
[00:37:31] Sure.
[00:37:32] There's, yeah, they have like full, they have gay mouth.
[00:37:33] They got a real, you have a free game.
[00:37:35] Yeah.
[00:37:36] Yeah.
[00:37:37] Yeah.
[00:37:38] Yeah.
[00:37:39] Yeah.
[00:37:40] Well, me and Cameron, you know, we're, we're, I mean, that's, that's always sort of been
[00:37:41] what, what handsome is traditionally handsome.
[00:37:43] Just a little bit of feminine feminization.
[00:37:46] For sure.
[00:37:47] For sure.
[00:37:48] Elvis, Elvis looked like a little bit like a girl.
[00:37:49] I don't know if Elvis had gay mouth.
[00:37:51] He kind of like, here's the idea for lips.
[00:37:53] I don't know.
[00:37:54] I don't know yet.
[00:37:55] I don't have to take a look again.
[00:37:57] Yeah.
[00:37:58] The best, the best was the guys that were like considered handsome, even though were objectively
[00:38:01] not like Bogart or Jerry Orbach.
[00:38:04] Yeah.
[00:38:05] Yeah.
[00:38:06] This guy looks like absolute shit.
[00:38:07] God, that's how strong the patriarchy used to be.
[00:38:09] They just got to pick some guys that women had to fucking think are handsome.
[00:38:13] Yeah.
[00:38:14] We're really, really, really, really, really, really far back, man.
[00:38:16] We got to get back to those levels.
[00:38:19] Dude.
[00:38:20] It's like, I talk about like all the, the, the Vine boys getting pimped out of Reminder
[00:38:24] Mint.
[00:38:25] This is a good, good, come down film wreck to close out the year.
[00:38:28] Have you guys seen the documentary or heard of the documentary that came out this year
[00:38:31] called Tickled?
[00:38:32] No.
[00:38:33] Yeah.
[00:38:34] I heard about it.
[00:38:35] I saw the trailer, but I was going to see it and then I heard it was like pretty disappointing.
[00:38:39] Like, no, I, I enjoyed it.
[00:38:41] It was entertaining because like it's just the, like the concept is that there is this
[00:38:45] basically one guy in Long Island who's been impersonating like women and people online
[00:38:51] for years.
[00:38:52] Here is basically blackmailing teenage and boys and young men into tickling each other
[00:39:00] on videos.
[00:39:01] Hell yes.
[00:39:02] That, that, that, like, and he is the, the, the mastermind of this entire like boy tickling
[00:39:07] network.
[00:39:08] Hell yeah, dude.
[00:39:09] And rules it through intimidation and blackmail.
[00:39:12] It's done through Christianity sort of like as like kind of like, as he blackmail him.
[00:39:18] He gets like dick pics.
[00:39:19] Well, like, well, like, well, you blackmails him because he's like then threatens to like
[00:39:21] show all of these pictures and hours of a video to like their friends, employers, school
[00:39:26] colleges.
[00:39:27] The name, the name makes it sound like it was like it should have been a Brennan Frazier
[00:39:30] movie that came out in 2000.
[00:39:32] Yeah.
[00:39:33] Yeah.
[00:39:34] Yeah.
[00:39:35] Post your age.
[00:39:36] I've got to find these boys.
[00:39:37] Yeah.
[00:39:38] I, I, I, I got to find them.
[00:39:41] It's pretty nuts though.
[00:39:42] I'm going to check that out.
[00:39:44] I want to see that shit.
[00:39:45] Speaking of beef rage, you know, I'm moving guys all the other day.
[00:39:48] Monkey bone, bedazzle, bedazzle.
[00:39:50] What's that?
[00:39:51] Is that the one who's the devil or whatever?
[00:39:53] It's a devil.
[00:39:54] It's a good movie.
[00:39:55] It's a good movie.
[00:39:56] He asked to be like a famous, a famous basketball star, but he's really sick.
[00:40:00] Yeah.
[00:40:01] He has to be the most sensitive guy in the world, but he can't stop crying.
[00:40:04] Yeah.
[00:40:05] Yeah.
[00:40:06] Yeah.
[00:40:07] He's a fucking, oh, she's a dime arena.
[00:40:09] Yeah.
[00:40:10] She's really good in that shit.
[00:40:11] You ever see, I remember seeing tabloid pictures of her with like 35 nikarett patches on her
[00:40:17] body.
[00:40:18] Yeah.
[00:40:19] Yeah.
[00:40:20] Yeah.
[00:40:21] Apparently she looks like she smells like cigarettes.
[00:40:22] A cigarette a day.
[00:40:23] Hell yeah, dude.
[00:40:24] She probably does.
[00:40:25] She, she kind of looks evil, which makes sense for being Satan.
[00:40:29] Is that a British thing maybe?
[00:40:31] Looking evil?
[00:40:32] Yeah.
[00:40:33] Now they, well, they either look like big time pussies or they look evil.
[00:40:36] Look at their up to something or they have like that fat like scone face.
[00:40:40] Yeah.
[00:40:41] Them boys up to something.
[00:40:42] Yeah.
[00:40:43] They plot.
[00:40:44] They scheme the British.
[00:40:45] Sorry real quick.
[00:40:46] This is the point in the movie where Rachael E. Cook reveals to Freddie Prince Jr. that
[00:40:51] her mother died and she makes collage art about it and she's gone back to being really unattractive.
[00:40:56] Oh, she went back to that fucking ponytail.
[00:40:59] If I see that bullshit one fucking bitch.
[00:41:02] She's on her toe.
[00:41:07] Yeah.
[00:41:09] Her collage art sucks though.
[00:41:11] Yeah, she sucks it on.
[00:41:12] She's actually depicting Muhammad.
[00:41:14] Yeah.
[00:41:15] Yeah.
[00:41:16] Every whatever it paintings is.
[00:41:17] Why is she, why is she being a piece of shit to him?
[00:41:20] She doesn't know.
[00:41:21] She's not aware yet of his like scheme, you know, she's defensive.
[00:41:24] She can't let people in.
[00:41:25] She has a past.
[00:41:26] Come on, man.
[00:41:27] What's the past?
[00:41:28] Being hard.
[00:41:29] Her art.
[00:41:33] No, they were in the car together and she was doing collage art in the back and like
[00:41:39] the mom was like, just put that away.
[00:41:41] She squirted paint on the wind.
[00:41:44] She painted a picture of like a beautiful sunset on the inside of the wind sheet.
[00:41:49] Before her mom went to work.
[00:41:52] Then her mom fucking went right into a set.
[00:41:55] Her mom ran into Kanye West.
[00:41:58] So it wasn't his fault.
[00:41:59] And then he spit it through the wire.
[00:42:01] Yeah, yeah.
[00:42:02] Dude, yeah, it's like in Team America where they, they talk about the cast of cats raped.
[00:42:08] That's why he hates actors.
[00:42:09] Yeah.
[00:42:10] It's great.
[00:42:11] By the magic of Mr. Misswapel.
[00:42:12] We gotta go see cats.
[00:42:13] That is such a funny fucking movie.
[00:42:15] Is a cat some back on Broadway?
[00:42:17] Yeah, it is.
[00:42:18] It's where, yeah.
[00:42:19] We're gonna see it.
[00:42:20] We're gonna see it.
[00:42:21] We're gonna see it.
[00:42:22] We're gonna see it.
[00:42:23] We're gonna see it.
[00:42:24] We're gonna see it.
[00:42:25] We're gonna see it.
[00:42:26] What are we gonna see?
[00:42:27] David Mamet.
[00:42:28] That would be...
[00:42:29] Where's the fucking litter box?
[00:42:32] A piece of shit.
[00:42:34] You stupid kid.
[00:42:35] I'm trying to, I'm trying to cough up a fucking hair ball.
[00:42:38] And you're down my ass.
[00:42:40] Why don't you get a job you fucking cunt.
[00:42:42] I'm Shelley.
[00:42:43] I'm Shelley.
[00:42:44] I'm Shelley.
[00:42:45] I'm Shelley.
[00:42:46] I'm I'm Shelley.
[00:42:47] I'm all black.
[00:42:48] I tell ya.
[00:42:49] I was licking myself.
[00:42:50] Right now, so I'm a cat.
[00:42:51] Licking my arms and my legs.
[00:42:53] I was getting real clean.
[00:42:54] And then what about happens right as soon as I feel smooth I get this tickling in the back of my throat
[00:43:01] I know I'm just gonna buff up a big one
[00:43:06] We do we really legitimately should go see cats and review it for the pod dude
[00:43:11] It's a business expense. I want to see opera. Oh, I shouldn't listen. I want to go. I want to see
[00:43:16] My opera do you mean that short for Phantom of the Opera?
[00:43:19] I've never seen Phantom of the Opera, but I was reading the Wikipedia page a while back
[00:43:26] I had no idea that his name isn't the Phantom of the Opera. It's Eric
[00:43:32] In the opera, that's just a guy named Eric. It's just my friend Eric. Yeah, yeah
[00:43:36] They don't call me Eric though, and it do we should go see Joseph and his amazing Technicolor dream code and then get kicked out for yelling
[00:43:43] Where's the coat?
[00:43:45] The entire coat coat bring that coat out. Let me see that motherfucking coat
[00:43:53] The real world shit, I didn't realize he makes the real world. Why the fucking people watch I never understood the real world
[00:44:00] Sometimes girls would make out with each other. Yeah, yeah like in the real world Vegas season
[00:44:05] They there were two girls making out for like two seconds on one episode
[00:44:08] So, you know, I watch the whole yeah, it's funny
[00:44:11] I like bitch about like vine stars and shit and like, you know how they literally do nothing and they have all this fame
[00:44:16] But that's exactly what the real world was. Oh, yeah
[00:44:19] Yeah, it's just fucking people those guys would have been on the real like Cameron whatever he was gonna figure out a way to be you know
[00:44:25] That's all it is now by Hanson. Oh shit. You guys ever listen to Hanson? Yeah. Oh, this is the two two kids are battle wrapping each other
[00:44:35] It's the only two black people
[00:44:37] No ushers in this and look him and the president's helper in the Westways is the beatboxing guy this Wario character
[00:44:48] Why are there so many stokes at school? Yeah, dude
[00:44:53] That's weird for a 90s movie 90s movies were like aggressively anti. Oh cuz he's the bad guy
[00:45:00] And that was an art nerd no 90s movies were aggressively anti-cigarette
[00:45:04] Right, right. That was a guy. You know those things will kill you that fucking shit
[00:45:08] Fuck man every other decade. They're so pro. Yeah every black and white movie everyone's spoken cigarettes
[00:45:13] They look so fucking cool. Yeah, and it's not like they didn't know prior to the 90s
[00:45:18] Yeah, yeah, but they honestly I don't know up until like I always wonder about this like how did he become an actor?
[00:45:27] Fucking bloated pumpkin should be in a bowling league. He was in other shit. This guy was in other shit
[00:45:32] Yeah, I know on daredevil. He's Kevin's isn't he
[00:45:37] Power Rangers one of the bad guys one of the bullies
[00:45:39] Isn't he Kevin from home or Kevin's older brother from home alone? No is that buzz is yeah?
[00:45:44] It might be buzz. I don't think so. He is the beta beta friend on daredevil the one who
[00:45:51] daredevil fuck this bitch, right
[00:45:53] No
[00:46:00] He could
[00:46:02] The girl wants to fuck their devil, but she does it and then that opens up the thing for him to fuck her, right?
[00:46:11] Fucking annoying would it be if you break up with a girl and then you see her on the street
[00:46:15] And she's walking around with some fucking daredevil blonde guy and she's like oh, he's like a great listener
[00:46:20] Like you never listen to me. You know he can't like you know and cuz he's blonde cuz he's fucking blonde
[00:46:31] Yeah, his other senses including listening and then he's just grab your pussy. He's like yeah, this my service bit
[00:46:36] She's gotta wear that weird
[00:46:51] I only suck dick and let this man know when across the street
[00:46:55] So yet again that would be pretty
[00:46:58] My fucking Trump makes that happen that you can get a service bitch if you're blind
[00:47:02] It's a pubes joke at this PG-13 movie is that where they put the pubes on the pizza
[00:47:09] It just literally just happened
[00:47:12] What's going on here who's Taylor Vaughn? Oh prom queen? Oh?
[00:47:18] Oh
[00:47:18] Freddy Prince's regulating kill all artists
[00:47:24] The bad guy in the movies wearing a shirt that says kill all artists
[00:47:27] That's so sick that's a punk rock. That's exactly what the punk rock guy would wear
[00:47:33] Like you know like it was like Pete Seager or something you stuff like a
[00:47:36] Oh this guy was doing clean old
[00:47:42] Wow this is before Columbine
[00:47:46] Early role for Dylan what else is this guy in this is in creep do you think like Dylan
[00:47:52] Cleveland and Dylan roofer can go to a special heaven for guys. Oh my god
[00:48:00] You definitely going to the same
[00:48:06] His name isn't Dylan
[00:48:08] It's like for making that joke you ready Prince. You're just making a guy eat pubes. This is own pubes
[00:48:14] Oh, it's like saffron threads. Yeah, you know
[00:48:21] It's funny is like they're probably fake pubes
[00:48:24] But then some guy from like the props department like they fucked up his union hours or something and then they became real
[00:48:34] Oh, yeah, I think why are they afraid of him this guy easily beat up pretty good. He's got a tattoo two of them
[00:48:41] Yeah, well, he's got status dude
[00:48:44] Oh, they're mean to Simon. That's why it's making them in pubes. They're mean to them
[00:48:48] They're not learning any lessons here. They're just getting bullied right. You're looking at that
[00:48:53] Piece of shit. Oh, I forgot even chef. Yeah, he's got hearing aids. Yeah. Do you see that trashy Asian lady? I
[00:49:01] Don't know what you're saying about why she watched dude
[00:49:03] She's hot. He's using his bullying for good now. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, that's like I from Len in the background at the bucket hat
[00:49:17] Her look
[00:49:19] Yeah, that's a trashy
[00:49:22] Kill all art is he an insurance. It's a kill all deaf kids
[00:49:26] With a gun
[00:49:28] What year was this movie made though 1998 and 99 this was like right at the cuss before everything got dark. Yeah
[00:49:34] Yeah, well you wouldn't be able to wear that shirt to school
[00:49:37] No, no, I'm raging against the machine's shirt
[00:49:39] They made me turn inside out because it had like zapata with a gun on the front
[00:49:43] Well, I bought a I bought a fucking
[00:49:46] Chate shirt on vacation in Mexico with my parents and I thought it was a rage against
[00:49:50] I was like 12. Oh, dude. I was such a piece shit when I was like a senior in high school
[00:49:58] I had one of those the Che Guevara shirts. I thought I was cool as shit, dude. Oh, yeah, you can buy these shirts
[00:50:04] Okay, all artists all artists sure. Yeah, hell yeah. Oh, let's get down. Wait one of them is
[00:50:10] $430 that's what it's 420. I'd buy it Tom sacks. Is that like a fancy designer?
[00:50:16] Um, let's just bootleg them dude. Yeah, we can definitely design these for ourselves
[00:50:22] Joke shirt calm. Let's see if we can probably get it
[00:50:25] Our sponsor joke sure go there use promo code come town to get to kill all
[00:50:31] Free and if they don't send it to you, please send death threats
[00:50:39] Not worth it. Oh, yeah people are ordering those a
[00:50:43] Funny mom's t-shirts. Oh, yeah, I'm sending them out
[00:50:46] That's crazy. You'll be getting them this week if you if you were funny mom's t-shirts the Jordan
[00:50:52] Where's my two eggs bitch?
[00:50:56] You guys should
[00:50:58] Are you guys selling these not yet?
[00:51:01] Ultra limited edition my failed dad Christmas present
[00:51:05] I was actually the best president ever he actually made bootleg t-shirts
[00:51:08] Awesome, you guys got any two X's for the kid me my dad are doing the thing where we just sort of talk to each other
[00:51:13] Once we can pretend like we got something for each other and that we just don't know how to mail it
[00:51:19] Me and my parents are doing a thing where they forget the name of my podcast that I'm on
[00:51:24] They're like how is that the boy the boys? Why did you tell Jima tell them they found out? I told you that yeah
[00:51:31] Yeah, they remember they disowned them because the podcast is anti Israel. Yeah, yeah, yeah
[00:51:35] We're pro we're pro BB netz on yahaha. Well, we don't we'd support a one-state solution where the entire world should become town
[00:51:44] We actually Israel we want come Israel to become well. No, no
[00:51:50] Would be Israel and then Israel actually my plan is
[00:51:55] Cell Israel to the Anthony Kumiya network
[00:51:59] Turned into one big podcast
[00:52:01] Where you side Dave jerks off retards all day long jerks off the real city
[00:52:09] Jerk them off Dave
[00:52:12] It's in the that's now that's in the second temple now. Yeah, yeah, whatever the most sacred places
[00:52:20] Whaling wall is the name of Gavin's new show
[00:52:25] Fuck yeah, dude
[00:52:27] Fuck what was I say well you like Star Wars didn't you let's talk about this cuz that shit rogue one you
[00:52:32] Yeah, I thought it was pretty good. I didn't see yeah
[00:52:35] I thought it was like I thought it was a million times better than the force awake. That's great
[00:52:39] That's great. Yeah, force away. Yeah force away. I thought it's first way means was terrible like force puts me to sleep
[00:52:45] Well, I haven't seen I don't want to talk about folks
[00:52:48] Not bad, dude folks. No, it's me. I got it. That's nice. All right. I just want to make sure
[00:52:53] Yeah, I heard it
[00:52:55] Yeah, no, I mean I want to go see Rogue one or at least I can't find a screener of
[00:53:00] Rogue one. Yeah. Yeah, it's the screener season has been tough this year. It's been bad
[00:53:05] I normally watch all the movies around Christmas
[00:53:09] Yeah, make Phil get him. Well no it fills industry now. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, so you should have access
[00:53:14] That's for Sony. That's more of a reason to have your friend Phil who works for Sony who could never be fired for giving us
[00:53:20] Screen copy the screen
[00:53:22] To the internet
[00:53:31] Hacks Sony is just like dude work is so stressful like North Korea hacked us
[00:53:35] I was like why do you care? He's like the whole company might shut down like there was like a good chance
[00:53:42] Seth Rogen almost destroyed the entire company hell yeah, wait it was Seth Rogen's fault
[00:53:47] Yeah, cuz they did that move that the big one in here. Yeah, yeah, yeah, which wasn't even worth it. Yeah, what's up with it? Yeah
[00:53:54] Oh, we're gonna
[00:54:02] Sorry
[00:54:11] Jim Henson presents Seth Rogen
[00:54:13] Oh
[00:54:16] Man, I would love to be Seth Rogen rich dude. I've been thinking about being rich recently. I hope it never happened
[00:54:21] It broke. Oh, I forget dude Paul Walker tries to fuck her so he could win the bet. Oh
[00:54:29] No, they're gonna explode
[00:54:32] Paul Walker is so conniving in this. I'm glad he's dead now. I'm so angry
[00:54:37] He's whoa whoa, oh the plan is not cool
[00:54:44] What the fuck dude, I'm sorry, I'm enraptured by this movie
[00:54:47] We watch varsity blues next I don't want
[00:54:51] The Cameron Dallas show next or Congo. I would really love to watch con after after we wrap this
[00:54:58] objectively terrible
[00:55:02] Yeah, whatever man, you know, I feel bad
[00:55:05] But it's also like the TV was purchased with the money we made from podcast, right?
[00:55:10] So it's like should I really feel bad? It's kind of the audience's fault. Yeah for giving me that money. Yeah, I feel great
[00:55:17] Yeah, yeah, I've only been great. Yeah, mostly stops fault
[00:55:22] I'd say and then probably mine next and then Adam's been surprisingly good this one
[00:55:29] We talk about your fan Bob who sounds off in the comments
[00:55:32] It's Bob Bob is the funniest I love Bob so much
[00:55:37] And the one reason like I get two hours a week away from my demon
[00:55:49] Facebook when I did race wars and I thought it was like, you know
[00:55:52] Somebody doing an old guy character and I messaged him and I was like what what's your deal?
[00:55:57] He's like just a racehorse fan
[00:55:58] I'm like pretty really like an old-ass man or he's like well, that's you know, I guess relative
[00:56:08] She's a clown James Cameron ripped her off. That's the Navi right there
[00:56:14] This avatar
[00:56:17] Came out and immediately flashlight had an avatar
[00:56:20] Pussy
[00:56:28] It's made more money with little cultural impact is avatar. It's crazy. No, I mean it's insane
[00:56:35] There's literally been a movie that's made that much money. That's crazy
[00:56:39] It's the highest versus yeah, and it's it's a garbage movie. It's such a dick
[00:56:44] But you know the first one you go and see it and like what makes it such an immersive experience is the 3d glasses
[00:56:52] But for the second one it's gonna be even better because it's gonna be in 3d
[00:56:55] It'll probably be in 4k, but you can also bring your avatar flesh
[00:57:03] Dimensions
[00:57:08] That's why fucking Stephen Hawking is obsessed
[00:57:10] With special relativity you jump, but you remember in in avatar right like the they like they when they hook when they fuck
[00:57:18] Yes, they had their like tails ponytails like tentacles
[00:57:23] Like actually it's like yeah, work with one another exactly it's the USB thing. That's interesting. It's talking
[00:57:29] However, they're talking in that movie when they like tame those like flying dinosaurs or whatever they pour into them as well
[00:57:36] Oh, yeah, they're fucking with dinosaurs. Yeah to fuck dinosaurs. That's awesome. Yeah, I realize that odd
[00:57:44] Straight very strange my favorite scene in that movie is when the mech pulls out a knife
[00:57:49] When the robot has a knife
[00:57:52] The robot has a I mean weapon of last resort. Yeah, I guess I remember the
[00:57:36] I
[00:57:39] Yeah, it's a fuck dinosaur. That's awesome. Yeah, I realize that odd
[00:57:44] Straight very strange my favorite scene in that movie is when the mech pulls out a knife
[00:57:49] When the robot has a knife
[00:57:52] The robot has a I mean weapon of last resort. Yeah, I guess
[00:57:57] Pollock isn't this movie Norman Norman Wigerson had the funniest line about that movie goes
[00:58:02] What the fuck did he say he was I so was just like black people meets the cover of every yes album
[00:58:13] It does look really prod rock. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I can't believe yeah
[00:58:17] I thought I heard that that once it came out. He was gonna make like seven like he had this crazy
[00:58:21] We designed a language. He had like a language. He was make a language for and yet the font that you have funny
[00:58:27] exactly he basically
[00:58:29] So bad it's a little bit commissioned a
[00:58:32] Linguistics professor like there a guy that did screen printing
[00:58:36] Maybe some shitty merch for my movie
[00:58:39] Print it up. I bet you paid better than me fucking professor whatever the fuck the he's a he's such a sprigger James Cameron
[00:58:46] You should watch do yourself a favor watch his best director acceptance speech for
[00:58:53] Titanic it's so funny. Yeah when he asked for a moment of silence like I like a
[00:58:56] What victims of the Titanic
[00:59:00] During Bosnia
[00:59:05] For the Titanic victims
[00:59:09] At the end he's like then he's like just not crushing the speech and it's going really bad that at the end
[00:59:15] He's like well, I guess there's one thing left to say yeah, I'm the king of the world
[00:59:26] Dude, what's his name?
[00:59:29] Yeah, which guy who directed shame and then 12 years of slavery. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, um
[00:59:34] Steve McQueen. Yeah, yeah, he should have done that for 12 years of sleep
[00:59:38] I'm 12 years
[00:59:46] But like okay, so he's asking for a moment of silence for the victims of the Titanic yeah, yeah, yeah
[00:59:51] Worst one of the worst bonus accidents ever
[00:59:54] He could get mad at him for like Hollywood just only recognizing white victims
[01:00:00] Only white people died
[01:00:06] Then you can accuse all those people of stealing Cedric's bit
[01:00:10] About out no black people no black bands. You may play in as the ship goes down. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, which is a great bit by the way
[01:00:16] I think it's hilarious bit. What's the bit?
[01:00:19] They got the bands playing is the he's maybe it's Steve Harvey, but they're like what I think it's a trick
[01:00:24] Yeah, it's like what black band you know is gonna be playing as the ship go down
[01:00:28] It's like you know fucking cool in the gang is like pack up the shit
[01:00:33] It was on Kings of Comedy it's from the King special. It's part of the bigger bit which is about how like
[01:00:38] Black people anytime they see people running they
[01:00:43] He also said joke and that one about how
[01:00:45] Black people he's like black people can't play hockey cuz it's a sport where they let you fight
[01:01:00] Dude Cedric's amazing. I think it's a very good comic
[01:01:05] For you guys here we were watching the Werner Herzog volcano documentary
[01:01:09] Yeah, and in it he talks about there is this French couple that like they all they did was film volcanoes
[01:01:15] But film them like extremely close up in a way. That's just stupid. Yeah, like they got amazing footage
[01:01:20] But it's just like it's just suicidal right and he's like, you know
[01:01:24] They filmed volcanoes for many years at great risk to their lives
[01:01:28] Of course, they would eventually killed by a volcano
[01:01:33] So of course I had the thought that this would be a great bit for a black comic. Yeah
[01:01:39] What black people
[01:01:41] You really do I guess like they just never get killed by nature
[01:01:47] And that's the trade-off that's why we have to do it
[01:01:51] Is because you know what tornado this turn a second
[01:02:01] Yeah
[01:02:03] But but hurricane Katrina would fuck what killed so many people wasn't actually the hurricane it was the levees
[01:02:09] Yeah, it was a man made disaster
[01:02:11] Right, it was the Army Corps of it was also the police afterwards
[01:02:16] Raping their way through fucking New Orleans. Yeah shooting all those people
[01:02:22] Damn
[01:02:23] That's when you could really you could really let loose as a cop. Yeah, that's being a racist
[01:02:27] Like a story about a black guy getting eaten by a killer whale. You'd be like that can't be right. Yeah
[01:02:34] Yeah, I know Jamel used to have a bit about a canoeing and
[01:02:38] And and what is that mountain climb mountain clap? Oh, that's so that joke is so funny
[01:02:43] Yeah, oh shout out to our friend Jamel Johnson who has started listening to the podcast and loves it. Oh, yeah
[01:02:49] Yeah, nice. We have now launch you know, so Larry. Yeah, for sure. We will I'm trying to get him to come out here
[01:02:55] Melly, well, we suddenly got way too fucking loud. Why is it so loud?
[01:02:58] Is this chemical brothers? No, it's fabulous. Yeah. Oh shit
[01:03:02] Like you guys know the whole school dancer dancing was this
[01:03:05] Yeah, yeah, yeah, the whole school knows a Bollywood style dance
[01:03:10] But they're very girls is so hot. Yeah, and Usher is the DJ of the school
[01:03:18] Dream that Wow, who is doing thriller now. This is awesome, dude
[01:03:23] Yeah, I sure sure sure dude go off dude now. There's a man who fucks a sure Raymond
[01:03:32] Not a virgin
[01:03:34] Yeah, they should they should do this in high schools where they force the theater department to coordinate all the dances
[01:03:39] months in advance
[01:03:41] It's a fucking four-story party. I love it. Yeah, yeah
[01:03:46] Right, this is the force believable
[01:03:50] Wow, I can't wait doesn't pull the Paul Walker must try and like Biff her right like rape or some
[01:03:54] I think that is from home alone. I think it is it is also in not yeah that guy's in a blue ruin
[01:04:00] Oh friend that gets the guns for
[01:04:04] Yeah, whoever is bit from our buzz from home alone. Oh really?
[01:04:10] That was a fantastic movie. Yeah, cuz he's gained like a million pounds. No, yeah
[01:04:15] I had a pack of those got a very small role in this movie. Will have you ever seen rad the BMX movie?
[01:04:20] I think I mentioned oh you talked about on the show. I don't we talked we talked about in person. Yeah
[01:04:24] We talked about a tip top. Yeah, we watch that maybe that's a good one. What about gleaming the cube the Christian
[01:04:31] Skateboarding movie. Yeah, yeah, we are gleaming the cube that should rules
[01:04:35] What's the movie at the cutting edge where the hockey player? Oh, that was great loses his sight
[01:04:40] Yes, they become a figure skater
[01:04:43] Yeah, no uses the the skills he learned on the ice. Yeah
[01:04:46] Yeah, I love the premise of happy Gilmore. It's like what if a guy played golf wasn't a complete pussy? Oh
[01:04:57] It's like because he's so sure everybody plays golf is too weak
[01:05:01] Hit the ball hard. It's like Tiger Woods like benches like three plates. Yeah
[01:05:08] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, he's still strong. You saw a shirtless Christmas look at how many women he's he's cheated
[01:05:14] You have to be very strong yet. Yeah, every every waitress that it takes truck stop you it takes crossfit to cheat on your wife
[01:05:23] It is a sign of strength, dude. No week guys fuck except for Adam man Paul Walker was great. I'm the only one
[01:05:30] And you know how I how I do it now being on the bottom every time
[01:05:35] Being a bottom every time. Yeah big bottom
[01:05:37] Somebody messaged me somebody said that we wait someone said wait wait me and they were like
[01:05:44] Yeah, I was at a party with somebody that fucked out him one time and they said that Adam was doing all his gay
[01:05:48] Shit before they fuck like trying to turn his he was like
[01:05:51] Let me make my body into the shape of different states
[01:05:55] Pretending he was Idaho and florid and then I was like, yeah, it makes me that is quite literally the gay shit
[01:06:00] I've ever heard of my entire life. You definitely did it
[01:06:03] You definitely did away you 100% I would tell you if it was me. I would not be in my you did
[01:06:09] I've said enough on this podcast and off this podcast you guys
[01:06:13] Real quick
[01:06:14] I have to cover also because I guess people couldn't find that I forget where I mentioned the FBI story and I guess people were
[01:06:20] bugging me about it, but
[01:06:21] the FBI came to interrogate me for being a
[01:06:25] Isocimpathizer because my piece of shit Philly uncle was going around saying that you know
[01:06:31] I was an isocimpathizer
[01:06:36] I just explained what like a calif it was
[01:06:41] You literally asked you like what the deal is with Isis and you explained it to him and then he reported you to the FBI
[01:06:48] I'll know about that a having knowledge
[01:06:51] Much information
[01:06:53] You got a call to FBI on him. So that's what happened. He's telling the guys down at Wawa that you get mad at newspapers and shit. Yeah
[01:07:01] Mon epirof
[01:07:02] America on Facebook. Yeah, nothing. I'm a turn. Oh, yeah, that's the thing. They just lied
[01:07:07] I think they lied to the FBI and said that I wrote fuck America on Facebook because I did which is a crime and I
[01:07:12] Might call the FBI and tell them what if I'm meeting my shitty family just waste the FBI's time
[01:07:17] We're supporting each other back and forth. Yeah, you should be a little like like those FBI agents are like like at the bottom of their pile of work is like
[01:07:27] Six Saudi nationals joined a flight school
[01:07:34] Interested in learning I love or landing
[01:07:37] Dude, they're scary though. Like I had to meet them. Oh my god. Fuck. Yeah, you kidding. Yeah
[01:07:41] I'm just about getting a voicemail. We're they flat-top
[01:07:44] You know what kind of haircuts with FBI guys um one guy was like a cooler hipster looking guy
[01:07:49] But FBI hipster you're like REI hipsters
[01:07:55] And then the other one I think oh, yeah
[01:07:57] The other one was like a mid-Atlantic guy that came up because he had sort of like an accent
[01:08:02] I guess but you know they were wearing like Patagonia, you know like North Face
[01:08:07] Really they weren't wearing black suits. Yeah. Yeah, it was like there was Will Smith. Yeah, yeah
[01:08:14] Yeah, and Will Smith did a rap and
[01:08:17] Beat the shit out of some guy there. They fuck you know, I think like they're the guys from the sopranos
[01:08:22] Yeah, that's my that's my that's nothing was just looking at his reflection and trying his sunglasses on
[01:08:28] Tommy Lee Jones questioned me
[01:08:31] So yeah, that's the episode. I'm real sorry about
[01:08:35] Fuck put it. No, no, it was fun. I'm kidding about it
[01:08:39] Apologizing but I do think it was about a day to put a movie. Yeah, it is for I can't I will never be able
[01:08:44] I should have learned that I
[01:08:47] Yeah, I mean I'm guilty of it too. It's impossible not to comment on this
[01:08:51] But how that's gonna translate to audio when someone's in the middle of the story and then you're like a blue shirt
[01:08:58] Who would wear that?
[01:09:00] I think people will appreciate me. Yeah, so being I'll take what guys
[01:09:07] I'm you're gonna have to do the math
[01:09:10] But right now the podcast is it one minute or one hour nine minutes 15 16 17 seconds and
[01:09:18] the line in the movie is
[01:09:21] Dean the key so something at the end so if you sync up download she's all that
[01:09:26] And sync it up based on that information watch it along with it watch it along with
[01:09:35] On Wizard of Oz and pink Floyd together will thank you so much
[01:09:41] For a while
[01:09:47] Non-chop like a I'm pretty sure they all subscribe
[01:09:50] Yeah
[01:09:52] You're one of the people that accuses us of being left to see we're not
[01:10:04] Produced it's better than most of Lewis's properties
[01:10:09] So listen the chap it's like one of the shirts. It's like a low low T version of us
[01:10:14] Yeah, it's like betas that no shit unlike us alpha dogs the T stands for thinking
[01:10:24] Thinking the guy with his fist under his chin
[01:10:29] Wait, did you tell me you were making fun of Wardell for liking the show and he's like politics is cool. Yeah, yeah
[01:10:34] Yeah politics is lit
[01:10:40] Smart
[01:10:42] Running Naruto on Hillary Clinton. Yeah. He's been doing these jokes since he was 60
[01:10:47] His brain nevering you anything. Yeah, there was never a point in brand's life
[01:10:50] We were smart and now he's trying to be smart. Yeah, and he can suck my titties
[01:10:54] Well, so suck stops titties Brandon Wardell
[01:10:58] And what about should we plug the show
[01:11:01] Live show. Yeah, you know, I've been talking to the other Lewis the Carolines Lewis
[01:11:06] I you know, I sort of soft confirmed that February 22nd date cool
[01:11:10] If you want to handle that actually I can yeah, just handle that
[01:11:15] Next Brooklyn date is gonna be the fourth Monday the month will remind you get on the podcast again
[01:11:21] Thank you everyone who came out that she was you have any like chapo specific stuff
[01:11:25] I'm gonna plug rather than our oh
[01:11:27] Not really we're gonna be we're gonna be in DC for the inauguration. We're not doing a nice show
[01:11:30] But we're definitely gonna be hanging out somewhere. Oh, yeah, follow us for stay updated on our DC trip cool
[01:11:36] Should I won a land ballroom? You should line something up there. I'll play funny moms
[01:11:42] Yeah venue for funny mom's cool. Yeah, yeah, they they really love me there
[01:11:48] How I how I never really respond to many emails, but you know, I I they're fully cheesecake egg rolls are fucking amazing
[01:11:55] That's so they're so they're so they're so good. Hey plant fries are also. Oh, yeah, those are good
[01:11:59] Shout out like I love that also I saw on Facebook pat and Oswald was there last night doing sand up
[01:12:05] It's one of my favorite bars in the country wonderland wonderland. Yes, sure. Yeah, I like it a lot
[01:12:09] I like it like out in nostalgia. Yeah. Well, it's just got it's like fun
[01:12:14] It's like a very fun bar even when I wasn't there doing comedy was like a fun bar. Yeah. Yeah for sure
[01:12:19] And DC doesn't have a lot of like great bars
[01:12:22] Yeah, well, it's true. Yeah, that's true. We can't stop at
[01:12:27] Wonderland and comment comment comment comment comment comment comment comment comment comment comment comment
[01:12:30] Well, that's a great that's a really good one bar
[01:12:33] Comment ping pong I used to go see shows at like when I was in college. I used to go fuck children
[01:12:38] I used to go see shows there when I was in kindergarten
[01:12:42] It was like a work study program
[01:12:49] Boyhors like firing ping pongs out of their ass
[01:12:53] Someone told me recently that ping pong is a cultural appropriate
[01:12:57] Interappropriate really it's like saying chop chop appropriative. Yeah, yeah chop chop bed. Yeah. Oh, yeah, really? Yeah
[01:13:04] You're supposed to take table tennis and and wait chop chop is bad
[01:13:11] What's wrong with chop chop?
[01:13:12] I think chop chop is like I like when the British were it's like in China like chop chop was like there
[01:13:16] It was like what you would say to your like coolly servant before you would chop their dick off
[01:13:21] Yeah, that's what a man chop chop roll chop you did a little bit of knowledge
[01:13:31] I gotta learn more like a British Raj slang
[01:13:38] You know a lot of good ones all right well, yeah guys you just got a free extra 13 minutes
[01:13:43] Yeah, you deserve it. Happy new you're happy new year