Cum Town | Regular | 06/16/2016
[00:00:35] I know I said the last one was big, but this one's even bigger than the last one.
[00:00:40] This is an Ashley Graham size podcast dude.
[00:01:00] We got Stavik, the Puerto Rican Corrattle Snake, and Adam of course.
[00:01:05] Puerto Rican rattlesnake, Adam Friedland, what's going on?
[00:01:07] Yeah, we're the Puerto Rican rattlesnakes of comedy.
[00:01:22] It was cool having a guest, but Dan really kind of stunk.
[00:01:25] Yeah, Dan, it was as good as you buddy.
[00:01:28] Yeah, we were like saying, what's that?
[00:01:31] Can I be real for a second on the podcast?
[00:01:37] Like, all right, you guys like, I think poo poo-d on me a little bit on that last episode.
[00:01:46] They're like, first of all, you lied to us about being the host of come down.
[00:01:49] Second of all, your boys are roasting me.
[00:01:54] You guys were a flat hand Brandon Wardell roasting me on the pod, and I wasn't even on it.
[00:02:00] I don't know who told you that, but they're a fucking liar.
[00:02:07] We didn't say a negative word about you.
[00:02:13] You can check it like, you can like, look it up.
[00:02:17] You said that I ruined the podcast and that I'd never be out of again.
[00:02:21] No, maybe in private conversation, I've like maybe offered constructive criticism about
[00:02:27] You never gave me constructive criticism.
[00:02:28] You should share it on me when I wasn't on the video.
[00:02:31] Look, you need to understand that when you come in here to the Anthony Cumi Estudios at the
[00:02:35] top of the Empire State Building, this is the Eagles Nest of podcasting.
[00:02:41] Don't put this, like make me out to be a PC pussy ass bitch.
[00:02:45] Don't make this all about your political bullshit where you're mad at it.
[00:02:51] This is about, this is about, no, this is about friends that started commenting together
[00:02:55] that are trying to fucking do a podcast together and not shitting on each other.
[00:03:04] I'm hot right now and it's not, I just, I would expect you're about to get banned.
[00:03:07] I can't, yeah, I can't believe you would even do this.
[00:03:16] Everyone knows I'm the gear, I'm the gear guy of the crew.
[00:03:19] I'm the one that makes all this shit happen and you're going to say that I did something
[00:03:27] When I went to B&H Photo and I had to deal with those that, you know who retches at
[00:03:41] Just saying what kind of person you want?
[00:03:49] Because if we have beef, you work it out on the pod.
[00:03:50] No, if you have beef, you work it out on the pod.
[00:03:57] Dude, you got beef, you bring it to the pod.
[00:04:00] He just left his podcast equipment here.
[00:04:29] This isn't going to work with two people.
[00:04:40] And whoever's hanging out will let them be our third coke.
[00:04:53] I'm not going to have you roast my good friend Nick.
[00:05:15] Because actually Nick, who you know, you know Nick.
[00:05:23] I won't have you saw his name, but he actually just left and we're looking for a third coke.
[00:05:27] And it looks like you're the third coke.
[00:05:31] This is actually pretty amazing how every time Seth Dickfield is here, it's like a Peter Parker
[00:05:37] I don't know what you're getting at it.
[00:05:40] Well, I'm here now and I tell you what, I love podcasts.
[00:05:54] Okay, I don't want to talk shit on Nick while he's not here.
[00:06:01] It's just his politics get kind of exhausting.
[00:06:09] That's what I like about Seth Dickfield.
[00:06:10] You know, when I hear PC, what I think in my mind is not politically correct, but pretty
[00:06:22] So, last time you heard you were talking about Lady Ghostbusters.
[00:06:26] I got it on a torrent, but I donated money to rain.
[00:06:32] So women that are raped will get the money for the Lady Ghostbusters, which I illegally
[00:06:36] downloaded to watch at my girlfriend's apartment.
[00:06:43] I only watched the first five minutes and then I had to...
[00:06:48] Is it true that they vacuum them up into their pussy song?
[00:07:03] You know, and what I was more afraid of than the ghost while watching the movie was the
[00:07:10] Because, you know, what is a ghost gonna do?
[00:07:11] You know, maybe scare you a little bit of man.
[00:07:23] I heard it is kind of messed up that the four female protagonists of the new Ghostbusters
[00:07:28] earned the least amount of money out of any actors on that film.
[00:07:33] And the original Ghostbusters were around in the 80s.
[00:07:35] And so even adjusting for inflation, they made way more money.
[00:07:40] And the female Ghostbusters had to do so much more work considering the increase of ghosts
[00:07:50] You know, I don't know if this is cool or not for a podcast, but could you give us a couple
[00:07:54] of good bits from the Ghostbusters movie, like a couple of lines that you remember?
[00:08:01] No, I actually don't remember any of the lines from the movie.
[00:08:04] I put the film on and then I looked in the mirror and I pat myself on the back for the
[00:08:12] Don't let those bad guys on Reddit tell you what you can or cannot enjoy.
[00:08:20] You asked, suddenly you asked for this with the Juno Diaz reading.
[00:08:23] Oh, by the way, Seth, do you want snacks or something?
[00:08:26] Yeah, we have actually we have like chocolate.
[00:08:54] I'll stay here with you, but like, do you have like an EpiPen or do you have like...
[00:08:59] I just need the people to tell me I'm a victim until I feel better.
[00:09:05] Someone tell me how much of a victim I am.
[00:09:06] No, I mean, if you're allergic to peanuts, we need to get like some medical professionals.
[00:09:12] Do you have like a very simple contact?
[00:09:18] Oh, I hate him so much, but please call my cousin.
[00:09:20] Was it the more comedian Ralph Harowski?
[00:09:35] Hey, yo, I was just in the other room taking this shit, yo.
[00:09:40] I love the way he'd be treating them blacks on Twitter, yo.
[00:09:42] Dude, you got a real way about himself.
[00:09:44] Okay, so let's clear what the hell is...
[00:09:48] I just had a peanut and I think I'm dying.
[00:09:59] Yeah, Seth Dickfield is my Jew, well, we call him at.
[00:10:03] He ain't no Jew, actually, Blo-Lan-Waz, but we know trust him because he wear glasses
[00:10:13] And honestly, that's even worse the way I look at it, yo.
[00:10:18] I can't, you know, my outrage has cured me of my peanut allergy.
[00:10:28] I'm off the ropes and I've had enough of this bullying from my ethnic white cousin.
[00:10:34] So, Ralph, do you find yourself in this sort of a similar political bit to Seth?
[00:10:38] Yeah, first of all, yo, I don't be doing no palaticio.
[00:10:45] I see the good on both sides, you know what I mean?
[00:10:48] Like I say, honestly, yo, you want to get abortions, yo?
[00:10:52] Do that because we try to wear condoms.
[00:10:56] So you get them borsches going, but you try to be present after you had an abortion?
[00:11:05] But you can't be holding a palatic office after you got abortion after you fucking killed
[00:11:12] That baby could have played third base for the fucking Orioles, yo.
[00:11:24] My other cousin worked at that elevator and he ain't seen none of that shit go down.
[00:11:30] This should be a statue of everyone in Ray Rice's victims.
[00:11:33] Sports should be illegal except for Lady Saka.
[00:11:40] You know, every time Seth be talking, we was growing up, we would just molest him, you
[00:11:55] I'm the only host left of come town right now and I feel like a response.
[00:12:17] So, Ralph, I'm just, I'd like you to be a role with Arony.
[00:12:21] I'd like you to respect your cousin even if, even if he is, fuck me.
[00:12:30] Even if he is doing whatever the black face is of Jews right now.
[00:12:40] How are you going to take history out the history books?
[00:12:47] I hang out at the library and I meet for you.
[00:12:51] I'll read, have you checked my Facebook?
[00:12:57] Yo, the apple in one scene, yo, the apple was black and white, but then it turned red,
[00:13:03] Yeah, I only read the first three chapters, but that shit is fucked up.
[00:13:10] You don't even know what a metaphor is.
[00:13:18] So then why is he your emergency contact?
[00:13:20] Like why did he show up immediately after you?
[00:13:22] I was, I was, I was, I was, he has a very fast car.
[00:13:29] I got six lawnmower engines in there on top of my four turbo torus, yo.
[00:13:34] You got a turbo that torus turbo that torus, yo.
[00:13:44] Yeah, y'all need any kind of type of paint.
[00:13:50] I took a couple of brand in a marketing classes over at the S.A.
[00:14:32] OK, and you will not speak to me like this.
[00:14:35] Go, that's why our uncle sucked your dick.
[00:14:43] do the obstacle course the slow is got molested that's how you train champions
[00:14:49] that's how you pre-chapiens I just fucking asked you are you telling me okay guys
[00:14:53] I here's my question okay rain is so you're you're you're implying that your
[00:14:58] cousin yeah was molested into behaving Jewish hey yep everybody knows that's
[00:15:05] how Judae started yeah well I you know I wouldn't disagree with that I just
[00:15:10] don't like the presentation of the facts I would say that's incorrect but you
[00:15:16] know maybe I maybe I chose not to do the obstacle course that fast yeah that's
[00:15:21] the other thing you know in the back of the head everybody knew he liked that
[00:15:24] yeah we don't get to go is there something right guys I know there was
[00:15:28] something wrong with that yeah we explained to me I know we're at least
[00:15:32] homophobic terms possible I know we're Lucy Guzy here on
[00:15:35] come town but Ralph I think you're really heading into dangerous territory I'm
[00:15:39] just a fine by your cousin first of all history ain't dangerous territory
[00:15:45] historically this is what happened to Seth he would get molested after the
[00:15:49] salary zone because he couldn't do the obstacle course and we would all sit in
[00:15:52] the back of the room pretending to be watching Martin reruns but really we
[00:15:56] was listening to him like getting molested and calling him gay that's it
[00:16:00] that's history you know that ain't nothing that's wrong you open your eyes
[00:16:05] thank you anyway what was you saying all right well I'm Seth I'm really sorry to
[00:16:10] hear about the constant abuse that you had to face growing up that's a that was
[00:16:14] just really good first of all he ain't grow up with us that was just during
[00:16:18] Thanksgiving Christmas oh yes that's where did you grow up I grew up in
[00:16:23] Louisiana oh that's what you hear your classic Louisiana accent everyone in
[00:16:31] Louisiana sounds like this you just sound like jeez like a real have you
[00:16:37] old yes it's it's just like you know Aunt Jemima speaks this way uncle Ben
[00:16:42] speaks this way yeah here's a question yeah okay because you're from Louisiana
[00:16:47] do you have more of a French perspective on things is that is that like a I would
[00:16:53] say so I like wearing tight fitted shirts and eating bread that looks like a
[00:16:58] penis yeah I don't get a pause yeah I don't pause you should have to pause
[00:17:03] yeah my man yet he still that way you was about to grow out that shit but I
[00:17:07] should have known better first of all I love women I it's both sexually and
[00:17:12] politically you know I bet you've gone down on a woman before of course I have
[00:17:16] that's how you have sex you know I never said you love women but you're
[00:17:20] decidedly anti Hillary Clinton if you love women why don't you support the
[00:17:25] woman I want me but I would have sex with Hillary Clinton I think Hillary is a
[00:17:31] beautiful woman and I would enjoy a body in a in a in a way that was all but
[00:17:36] both of us experiencing a simultaneous orgasm but Seth you should grow you
[00:17:40] divulged to us that you would have bitch do do you have her you got four circumstances
[00:17:45] progenistic you know that bitch got hair like my uncle Donald and you know what
[00:17:49] I donated all of my foreskin to trans people so that they could create new
[00:17:53] genitals what the fuck did you just say what a shitty name you ever think of
[00:17:57] Donald yeah talk that way the mongol yeah alright it's just a bad day I would
[00:18:02] never insult anybody's name especially you know I think she's gorgeous
[00:18:08] first of all let's be a little bit more respectful to women and our other guests
[00:18:13] Ralph listen what we do make me mad yeah I understand that Seth is probably one
[00:18:20] of the most annoying human beings that I've ever met my entire life he was but
[00:18:25] we can't we got a respect other opinions and perspectives here on come
[00:18:29] time I don't think that's the thing that I got upset about listening to the last
[00:18:32] podcast where Nick and Sov did it with a famous comedian Dan Soder without
[00:18:38] a lot so do you yeah you got good yeah they got so do funny as hell okay but
[00:18:44] like he's a lot better than your dumb ass yeah you know what I like is that
[00:18:48] they did brown-nosing is when people do that is they suck up yeah he much better
[00:18:55] you they should do that all the time dude what were you saying I'm just saying
[00:18:59] that like they did the Asian voices and South Asian oh hell yeah yeah I love
[00:19:06] I think that's despicable you should never do a voice of any kind of race
[00:19:11] agenda that doesn't belong to you don't believe exactly I agree with that too
[00:19:16] you should never make a man a caricature you should never do that ever
[00:19:19] unless we're in agreement it's one of those tasteful ones that you get on
[00:19:23] Times Square where they make you look like a ballerina but your head is very
[00:19:27] big yeah ballerina huh I wonder why my man like that shit my man like we're a
[00:19:31] dude no it's a very athletically demanding sport have you ever seen the
[00:19:37] calves of a male ballerina you know ballet everybody knows ballet is just a
[00:19:42] gay stuff the shit gay people watch to get in the mood to have sex with each
[00:19:47] other you know that's how it started you the Prince of fucking Russia couldn't
[00:19:52] get hard so he looked at men jumping up and down y'all think I don't know my
[00:19:56] history you but I think you saying no Adam listen I
[00:20:01] just think that like you can make jokes and you can make comedy without having
[00:20:07] to do belittling stereotypes of of different races I mean I think we can
[00:20:13] there are a lot of very funny comedians out there first of all there's truth to
[00:20:17] stereotypes okay Bill Mayor John Mayer you know these are guys that are really
[00:20:24] doing it without punching down you know they're punching I know they're punching
[00:20:30] on you I know I'm forgetting to fight with me you're y'all y'all only hurt y'all
[00:20:34] only here like fucking 10 hits you only punched down you only here 10 hits I
[00:20:39] hit you you hit the floor me and my boys hit you eight more times while you're
[00:20:43] locked unconscious yeah that's what you hear my man so I know a little bit about
[00:20:47] punching down anyway yeah this is fucking boring yeah with the fuck y'all got any
[00:20:53] fucking chicken bosses out here yeah I don't have any chicken pasta I do chicken
[00:20:57] bosses chicken box bosses yes bitch but bosses bosses you know what chicken
[00:21:04] boxes like a boss of chicken yeah I can't be around this motherfucker you
[00:21:09] there's too many Jews here you're Jewish ain't you I am Seth is not and it's he
[00:21:14] might as fucking well I just want to talk to you about I'm not Jewish I don't know
[00:21:19] why everyone thinks I'm a Jewish person what you're doing doesn't make any sense
[00:21:23] to me I would give my last nickel if I never had it well maybe not that far but
[00:21:27] I would I would consider it if I could never have to put up with that kind of
[00:21:31] I think the Anthony Cumin show is coming back you they're about to make a
[00:21:35] retarder got get a boner I gotta go I'm late for my ninth therapy session today
[00:21:39] so I have to leave anyways yeah fuck you I'm grateful that you got my
[00:21:45] emergency contact here but I am so displeased with having you be confronted
[00:21:49] with my awful cousin most of my family I don't get along with but him the least
[00:21:54] and his last father well I'm not gonna say I'm glad he's dead but you know it
[00:22:03] is at least a physical relief that I don't have to deal with him anymore well
[00:22:09] anyway yo I gotta get the hell up out of here yo I ain't been alright y'all will
[00:22:14] never hear me on this podcast again I could promise I probably me not either I
[00:22:19] don't think Ralph I'm coming back I'm leaving you fuck you that dick field
[00:22:24] Ralph thank you so much for being with us Raven's
[00:22:29] number one all right I guess I guess it's just me in the studio right now I I
[00:22:35] I just want to thank you guys for for listening I'm just gonna take it to
[00:22:41] break I guess and see if I can get Nick and stop by nation wide warehouse nation
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[00:23:33] all right we are back from break guys Nick and stuff have agreed to return hey
[00:23:40] guys way sorry sorry guys a little heated I got a little upset it got really weird
[00:23:46] here but while you were away and I'm just oh yeah I just that's okay dude yeah
[00:23:51] Seth was here yeah Seth and his and who who he told me came this guy from
[00:23:56] Maryland Carl Ralph Ralph Ralph yeah he uh Ralph a row he was a disgusting person
[00:24:04] hey well that's my culture man and Seth and him are cousins from what I
[00:24:09] understand so weird that's crazy convoluted yeah hey like that stretch
[00:24:13] yeah it doesn't really make sense it's weird that they both be here at the same
[00:24:17] time considering you know they live yeah so far apart but man it's good to be
[00:24:21] back you know I I need you and I need you and I don't want I don't want to do
[00:24:27] this apart again and I'm sorry for like being being a bitch dude that's right
[00:24:32] man that's okay as long as you understand like we didn't say anything
[00:24:35] negative about you on the podcast it's like you said but you know we accept
[00:24:40] your apology and I calmed down I went outside me and stopped you know we saw
[00:24:45] this we were out there this kid with a down syndrome walk by and I said this
[00:24:49] always make it I couldn't stop yeah for how proud of him I was not like in a
[00:24:55] market way he was felt so good for him that I calmed down the whole town told
[00:25:00] him he was Batman yeah we all pretend he was Batman I went up to him and I was
[00:25:04] like you're Batman he was like no I just push the cards here
[00:25:11] well it's good to be back yeah let's catch up well it's yeah people are gonna
[00:25:15] think we're setting up another bit we don't even bits we don't do you know I
[00:25:20] don't know people I guess if I've commented on that they're like you know
[00:25:23] we love the characters but there's no no numbers I don't think many I think it
[00:25:26] was due characters working on a couple yeah yeah we were thinking about like
[00:25:32] oh yeah let's see the French ones yeah we came up with this character he's like
[00:25:37] so he's a French guy in French yeah he's a hello I'm from France hello I am from
[00:25:46] France too and I am gay with him we are gay together we are gay and we are
[00:25:53] French and we are here and this is my boyfriend we we kiss each other and we
[00:26:00] have one of those bicycles that is like a double bicycle but we use the same
[00:26:08] seat anyways because it is a more gay yes my boyfriend is a fucking mean
[00:26:17] the house while we are riding on a bicycle we fuck men with my penis but yeah
[00:26:23] that's the character we're working on that's pretty good I thought that
[00:26:28] well yeah it was better in dress rehearsal maybe but I think that it went
[00:26:32] okay yeah we spent the last like fucking week and a half trying to figure out
[00:26:36] you know what about the four twenty one what four twenty one you know that the
[00:26:44] look here's here's thing I know it's four twenty isn't a joke to me you know I
[00:26:48] take that shit seriously dude absolutely okay 420 somewhere because you know
[00:26:53] what it's still a fucking crime you know that is true people like us are
[00:26:57] persecuted every day in states like luckily it's legal here in New York
[00:27:01] listen we can get we can get fucking 420 ripped up out on the streets whatever
[00:27:05] we want it's legal for white people and pretty soon it's gonna be legal for
[00:27:09] black people well I don't care about that I mean the first one yes it's true
[00:27:14] man everyone everyone worry about yourself you know that's the thing is that you
[00:27:17] can't put you can't put men can't put their laws on a plant yeah especially
[00:27:24] not for other white guys you on a plant okay thank you I think we're on
[00:27:29] agreement here about weed and gay French men do you guys want to talk weed real
[00:27:33] quick I would love to smoke we do always I'm smoking weed this is dank ass weed
[00:27:46] bro oh that's good get that finger out dang get that finger get that finger
[00:27:52] popping hell yeah oh damn Nick stop hitting that shit dude look at that
[00:28:10] banger red man stop hitting that you one time Nick hit a banger for a hold on
[00:28:14] I'm not even lying no I'm gonna do the joint on top of it oh dude you're sad
[00:28:19] dude she's so savage you just hit a banger and then hit and then hit a J
[00:28:25] without even playing out breath well great start to the second yeah that's a
[00:28:29] good session I think we had a good smoke out right now we had a good
[00:28:34] smoke out we had a good session I think that's like what's important you know
[00:28:37] man the thing about podcast is you just do them you know you just that's how
[00:28:41] that's how you build a listenership is you do them get good gets you know hot
[00:28:46] yeah I asked my friend the other night what he liked about the podcast and he
[00:28:49] said he liked the fact that we didn't come on try at all yeah I asked myself
[00:28:54] and I thought what do I like about the podcast and because I you know I've
[00:28:58] been considering actually listening to it after we record it and and I thought
[00:29:03] no that's stupid but good news I got a friend from Russia we're gonna hack
[00:29:09] mark marin's email and get all of his guests the week before they do what the
[00:29:13] fuck yeah that's nice so we got Chuck Mangione coming on next week he's gonna
[00:29:19] talk about his French horn aka the gay trumpet
[00:29:25] that is a gay ass trumpet from France I am a the gay trumpet I love a six with
[00:29:33] men we play as a horn with our penises we put it in the horn all right no I guess
[00:29:41] here's here's a thing we can talk about let's hear is so I worked a job last week
[00:29:45] can't really talk about it what kind of job I can't talk about it but there is
[00:29:52] some work yeah let's say I let's say I did a little thing where I had to wear a
[00:29:56] costume it's an oceans 14 I'm an oceans 14 I'm an oceans 9 11
[00:30:02] it's a movie where George Clooney and Matt Damon have to blow up the world
[00:30:06] that's great that's also also also national believe that out of the podcast
[00:30:15] because that's an ace bit that we get a nice bit you know that joke almost makes
[00:30:26] cop mouth things baby yeah mine too anyway yeah I'm working this job and
[00:30:34] I want to talk about I've tried I've maybe mentioned it to a couple of people
[00:30:39] but you guys are you familiar with black nerds oh because a lot of people
[00:30:45] don't know that they think black nerd they're like oh you mean Erkel and it's
[00:30:49] like no Steve Erkel was a black guy playing a white nerd that wasn't actually
[00:30:54] a black nerd there's no black nerd that's actually like that black was a black
[00:30:57] face splat Steve Erkel was a black guy playing a white nerd and then a real
[00:31:03] black nerd is more like Stefan yeah it's what Julia White thought was cool
[00:31:08] yeah I'm actually the cool Erkel I like Street Fighter and Dragon Ball Z I
[00:31:13] don't wear glasses I got contact check out my leather jacket that I wear in
[00:31:17] the middle of the summer yeah that's like a black nerd dude that's annoying
[00:31:21] black nerds are like katana type yeah they're all ghost dog way the Samara
[00:31:27] love there was a kid DBZ they love Avatar last airbender there was a kid
[00:31:32] in my NARU to in a pot in pop Baltimore polytechnist you baby fucking
[00:31:39] engineers bitch the poly crackers Baltimore polyamorous high school
[00:31:43] we all just like kind of like each other it was a lot of fluid bonding there was
[00:31:49] a kid who when he got mad at the teachers would pretend he was going
[00:31:53] super saying he would just he would be like huh like all right all right Jim
[00:32:00] get the fuck out of here man this is fucking and there's also another black
[00:32:04] nerd who he was very gay he was a black theater nerd actually those are the
[00:32:08] best I have also close friend in high school that was a black
[00:32:11] theater black in here nerd new karate you know Baltimore and he would just like
[00:32:16] people tried to blame for be gay and he fought one time he straight up
[00:32:19] roundhouse kicked like a thud kid in the hallway it was fun and then just did
[00:32:24] like a z snap it was fucking incredible and he was notorious yeah blowing like
[00:32:30] straight kids the fucking upstairs he was the he was the equipment managers
[00:32:35] or the keys to the closet he just blow kids all that was that was the guy I
[00:32:38] worked with it was like a black nerd incredibly jacked I'd like change with
[00:32:42] him they're like all the guys change over here and everybody else is in shape
[00:32:45] I'm like can I just change with the women there's gonna be like a shitty
[00:32:48] body room but he is oh yeah he's jacked he's wearing a wife beater that looks
[00:32:53] like a gold's gym wife beater but it says Goku's gym this guy like a drawing of
[00:33:00] Goku in the middle where the guy would be living anyways and one point he goes
[00:33:03] he looks at me and the other girl and he goes have either of you ever had the
[00:33:06] pleasure of watching Avatar the last hair better
[00:33:13] fuck yeah yeah but no he would have definitely fucked me up if I even you
[00:33:18] know remotely laughed at any of the things he said it's all great
[00:33:22] right right right whatever Stefan Erkel would enter a scene just going back
[00:33:26] to that I love how like I imagine that the fresh their family matters like
[00:33:32] audit they had like different signs for the audience like laugh and like
[00:33:35] whenever Stefan came out they put the cum sign up and everyone just be like
[00:33:40] oh why was he so hot like he's the enter into your people hey baby that was
[00:33:48] just jaleel like being like yeah he was so tired of being a fucking nerd
[00:33:53] Brandon Brandon Ward L is gonna do that at some point he's gonna demand that his
[00:33:57] agents let him play you know a character that's not a
[00:34:03] is my shit is popping dude it's time for me to go black I feel like I feel like
[00:34:07] Brandon sort of doing that already trying to try to make his brand about
[00:34:10] doing digital black games huh he's doing digital black what's gonna happen to him
[00:34:15] when he like finally ages out of that and he doesn't he doesn't that's true maybe
[00:34:19] he doesn't maybe just a you know he's a half Filipino he's got good good genes
[00:34:25] age wise I think he might be okay no I mean like I mean intellectually he ages
[00:34:30] out no never intellectually age out of it yeah maybe not who knows now he might
[00:34:36] who knows who cares fuck Brandon dude Brandon actually is here right oh is he
[00:34:41] yeah where you want to go get it you want to go get it go get Brandon dude
[00:34:44] make sure it just to have him like tell him that we don't do characters on
[00:34:48] this podcast just have brandy just come as yourself yeah any bullshit half
[00:34:53] fun characters yeah oh here he is oh oh oh oh hey guys hi okay so this is a
[00:35:02] Brandon it's nice your friend where Dallas yeah I was because we're boys I
[00:35:07] was just wanted to work out new bits that I do okay well this is you know it's
[00:35:11] kind of a conversational podcast we did yeah and and remember this isn't vine so
[00:35:15] you have more than six seconds to do your jokes that you sold from black people
[00:35:18] that won't that won't be necessary my dear man okay all right here's the first
[00:35:23] bit here's the first bit Brandon so so Drake so Drake was please here's my
[00:35:33] first bit so Drake was took a drink had a Pokemon and I said what kind of
[00:35:41] Pokemon is that right and he said it's a it's a charm and I said Drake you're
[00:35:50] savage a a friend your savage a a three got zero chill baby all right hell yeah
[00:35:58] did I try another job now I know are your famous let's hear a Brandon so just
[00:36:06] it Justin Bieber was Justin Bieber is in the news
[00:36:12] go ahead and Jack Jack Jack come in and you said Justin Bieber is this your
[00:36:21] bookie but it's just my bookie but Brandon Brandon Brandon Brandon's Brandon's
[00:36:31] mom is miss one I'm sure his dad's he's dad's a GI and his mom I don't know his
[00:36:36] parents I won't I won't stand for we can talk about shit on Brandon but not
[00:36:39] the wardows they are lovely people you've met his parents yeah no they're great
[00:36:43] why did you go to his bar mitzvah yeah last year is bar mitzvah last year I
[00:36:49] believe I'm so sick I skaska still the room right I'm sorry brain you still here
[00:36:54] hey buddy get out of here man I like that the brain is just emo Phillips yeah
[00:37:00] when that fuck was in that one that drink
[00:37:06] and Drake was lit right it was just like the guy from the B 50 series yeah yeah
[00:37:14] I'll go anyway the snapchat is a little
[00:37:20] place where we can rip off black he's gonna hear this and get mad for sure yeah
[00:37:28] we can have him on him will squash the beef yeah that's the point of podcast you
[00:37:32] start the beef and then you bring him on the pot and you squash the beef dude
[00:37:36] that's what the pods are all about baby you know I agree with that now and I
[00:37:39] think we've come full circle because initially I disagreed with that idea
[00:37:42] but there for beef squashing but now I you know I I think I agree with it and I
[00:37:47] no longer think the podcast are about like you know being funny or really
[00:37:52] having anything to say you know having conversations that aren't just like
[00:37:57] sort of cyclical and making fun of the same people over and over again I got
[00:38:02] 65 new Twitter followers I am drunk on power and let's keep keep a go with this
[00:38:08] podcast I think it's gonna be great right now I think what would be the best
[00:38:12] with the people demand is if we play a clip show of all the best moments we
[00:38:17] should do the next episode of the episodes I got some tweets about some
[00:38:24] people's favorite parts of the our episode stop doing this this is pathetic
[00:38:28] yes this is fourth one and we're talking about it it's fucking anything I know
[00:38:36] I just ate a lot of bread so I'm kind of like I'm kind of sleepy I want to tell
[00:38:41] nation come town just to keep listening because we have tons of topics issues
[00:38:48] discussions and other things that are going to be coming up in the next 55
[00:38:53] episodes that come down I'd love to talk about you know how's everybody doing
[00:38:58] fuckwise it is come town is everybody fuck we all we already did that last
[00:39:02] week none of us have fucked there's no oh here Adam's not girlfriend is here
[00:39:06] we'll just we'll just give her a microphone and she'll Michelle do you want to come
[00:39:11] on she's been sitting here in the background the entire time with things
[00:39:14] maybe we're about to do it she's trying to watch porn it yeah now there's now we
[00:39:18] can't introduce anybody this is falling apart it's gonna think it's a character
[00:39:21] this is fun though so you don't want it just come on the pod right you have to
[00:39:26] come on the podcast because we got to feel 10 more minutes and we need something
[00:39:29] here you take my microphone take take it guys this is my fwb Michelle and you
[00:39:37] don't use my real name that's not her real name her real name her real name is
[00:39:43] what we won't say we won't say what a real name is but so we understand that
[00:39:47] you don't want to date Adam is that true not at this moment sorry I shouldn't
[00:39:53] answer for the lady yeah I don't think so that's good no no tell us why I'd
[00:39:58] love this this is great oh let's hear why let's know I understand Adam is kind
[00:40:03] of a piece of shit time annoying he's kind of annoying sure
[00:40:07] what about it this is great I don't know it just doesn't feel like something we
[00:40:18] should do but it's cool to like smack fuck every once in a while yeah that's
[00:40:26] great yeah is that okay like what a cushion is feeling I'm in I'm
[00:40:38] enthusiastic I don't think I'm good at it I just think I'm passionate so he's
[00:40:42] like but he likes to cuddle afterwards he's a big cuddler I could tell that about
[00:40:46] him yeah I am too I feel like we're in the same zone where it's like I'm gonna
[00:40:50] try my hardest but that doesn't mean anything's gonna happen you know what I
[00:40:54] mean this means gonna be a great turnout yeah you know I mean yeah yeah I know
[00:40:59] what you mean but that's what I found that so if Adam was better fucking would
[00:41:03] you want to be with him grab a mic here Nick take items Mike fuck out of
[00:41:10] no I think if you I had like an undeniable dick I mean maybe the sex is
[00:41:17] good so I don't want to date oh I interesting but no no don't give us that
[00:41:22] bullshit answer to make Adam feel better but if he was like how so you say he
[00:41:28] fucks it about a 7 out of 10 right now right oh yes six to seven six to seven
[00:41:35] six to seven she bumped you down six eight I mean six eight six eight on your
[00:41:40] best day you get you hit an eight bees not bad dude but the one the 10 scale
[00:41:46] the one the 10 scale for men always translates directly to inches
[00:41:51] about inches I don't think that really matters what do you say I love it hey
[00:41:57] this is great oh yeah I'm back on now by the way this is got it I get it so but
[00:42:03] if he was a 10 out of 10 would you be with them would he be better
[00:42:09] fucking would it like equal out how annoying he is no I don't think it'll
[00:42:17] re-glout okay I think it's just I think it's just there forever that's so good
[00:42:23] to get out that's great so what are you let's find you a man what are you
[00:42:27] looking for we've got a podcast over 45 people I think
[00:42:34] I don't know I guess somebody who doesn't cook me breakfast see do you want to
[00:42:42] be treated badly this is a major podcast flaw because the only way podcasts work
[00:42:46] is if you have a girl but only when you just tell them to shut up all it's okay
[00:42:50] okay that's fair all the alpha male podcast you don't okay we don't have
[00:42:56] another sorry we only got three mics this is you know what that's 20 minutes
[00:43:02] so hey guys that was the second half you gotta look at some podcast you know
[00:43:09] what they're doing we're not he's kind of like you know hell yes you want a
[00:43:14] good podcast we got our friends sort of a sister podcast Chappo trap house yeah
[00:43:19] listen to that which are everyone who listens to this is just people they
[00:43:22] told yeah that once yeah they're very funny guys but they're also like you know
[00:43:28] if you're into like have you listen to it who the president is they're smart
[00:43:31] guys they're not dumb people I'll do that I'm not like a homework guy you know
[00:43:35] I'm not fucking nerds you we're not homework nerds we're like playing out
[00:43:38] what we're gonna say on the podcast yeah we just fucking get real and have a
[00:43:42] good time and we we fucking you know what we do we get 420 we give for
[00:43:51] I just want to also thank my friend with benefits Michelle for being on the
[00:43:58] other day thank you Michelle and I just want to say you bring a lot of joy to my
[00:44:01] life you're not my full girlfriend I don't care because you still make me
[00:44:06] happy when we're together so I'm gonna just say that out there to the world
[00:44:14] and everyone listening is a Cheryl Crow I think so you know it's doing the other
[00:44:26] it's pretty good thanks thank you for listening to come town guys follow me
[00:44:31] at on Instagram at staveybaby sta VVY baby naked as hell and I think you'll
[00:44:37] really like it I don't have anything else to plug because my career is bad but
[00:44:42] anybody else that's fine I'm a I'll be back on red eye on June 9th Fox News
[00:44:47] a box news a 4am program for yeah for a time from 4 to 4 a 1am only in the
[00:44:55] American Samoa and Guam yeah but yeah thanks for listening to the final
[00:45:01] episode of come town it's not the final episode it's gonna sound good it's been
[00:45:07] a great run we've had you know three great episodes probably the best run of
[00:45:11] any podcast we're gonna roll it in a best of next week so yeah I think we
[00:45:15] already we already made that joke oh did we yeah we did next week we're doing
[00:45:18] next week we're doing something a little bit different it's gonna be a
[00:45:21] little bit more planned out we're doing we're finally doing my plan of this
[00:45:25] American comm where we're gonna we're gonna have a host we're gonna have
[00:45:28] three different stories about American comm and and we'll see how I go it's
[00:45:35] actually illegal to transport raw comm across state lines really it's got to
[00:45:39] be pasteurized what if it's pasteurized you just swish it in your mouth a little
[00:45:43] bit spit it out well you have to switch it fast enough that it heats up like
[00:45:47] when we passed or did yeah you know a French guy that did all these experiments
[00:45:52] the common is I know a couple French you're forgetting that we already we
[00:45:57] already did right now allow we were just no stop let's end it we were and yeah
[00:46:03] yeah no we're ending it this is that's the end of this Jesus Christ my fucking
[00:46:07] has his penis all right goodbye everybody thank you bye everyone