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Ep. 65 - Construction Boys

Cum Town | Regular | 08/17/2017

[00:00:00] Oh
[00:00:02] Man what a long day. Yeah, you boys you boys been doing fucking manual labor all goddamn
[00:00:07] I gotta say the mall dog was really in his happy place today. Yeah knocking down walls using power tools
[00:00:15] Ripping shit up. Yeah, I feel like a bitch dude. I've been doing I've been doing like white collar
[00:00:21] Computer typing work all day and you guys have been real manly ass men dude. We're contractors
[00:00:26] You got you put on the white pants which I love mm-hmm every Greek like Mario. Thank you
[00:00:31] Isn't that what contractors where don't they go all white every Greek guy would always wear painters where all white?
[00:00:36] Well, yeah, I pray to it
[00:00:39] Contractors wear like mega death shirts
[00:00:42] You know yeah, no helmet no masks no gloves no goggles
[00:00:46] Yeah, we use SARS masks today because we weren't true
[00:00:49] Consecured had it left over from all the sex you have I insisted on not wearing a mask at all
[00:00:57] I like to really get in there feel the latex going in and out of my lungs
[00:01:01] I like that fiberglass from the dry wall tape just flying out of morning today that the dry wall tape had fiberglass in it
[00:01:08] So he's repeating it does it does dude, and that's why my arms are itching yet an allergic reaction to doing work
[00:01:14] I have a lot of allergies to make you labor. I have a lot of allergies
[00:01:17] It was funny though like I got there Adam was like cuz they did one wall yesterday without me
[00:01:22] I was like I guess you don't even for this and that showed up and I realized Adam's job the whole time was just doing clean up
[00:01:28] No, that was my job today because you were using the second saws all you mean
[00:01:32] I was using my saws all I own it's not the second saws all yeah, who when I brought with me to the project guys don't diminish
[00:01:39] What were you using what we use the first day will not be erased you just know this is also
[00:01:43] You guys are diminishing my my ability to do manual labor is because I kicked your ass in bowling
[00:01:49] Okay, that's true for the first four games first of all
[00:01:54] Okay, it was only two games of official tournament play because stop had a quit because of I was sick because of profuse
[00:02:00] I was sick but the difference is I'm fighting an illness right now
[00:02:03] My muscles are a lot bigger than yours, so it takes a good hour and a half before they get warmed up
[00:02:07] I'm like your little bird body fucking weak ass
[00:02:10] That's a good that's a good you sneeze and then you're like I'm ready to go and then you fucking I've picked a child's ball
[00:02:18] That's true. You weren't we're using a regulation. I was using a 13 you're using a little
[00:02:22] Yes, I was well the green balls were 13. They were 12 pounds
[00:02:25] So I was gonna I was gonna I was gonna make a joke and say that you were using a six
[00:02:30] But you were using a 12-pound I was using a 13 and your round ball is for you are using a 16
[00:02:35] I honestly yeah, you're using a three pounds more than this size ball that an adult uses is a fucking 16-pound ball
[00:02:42] Yeah
[00:02:43] Also an adult just throws it into the gutter because he tries to do cool spin every time and then what happened at the end at the end
[00:02:50] Everyone was exhausted and doing a bowl and you got her excuses, but you got addicted Mr.
[00:02:55] Excuse drug addict personality. See you you misunderstand addiction and persevering
[00:03:00] And that's why you will never be a basketball camp summer camp coach like I will because I understand
[00:03:07] Perseverance I can spell it and every single letter of the word perseverance means something relating to the basket
[00:03:13] Right pussy as we know peas for perseverance. Let's go through it guys
[00:03:18] Everybody let's come here. Let's take a new everybody come take a new. I'm okay. Yeah, it's good
[00:03:22] Alright, you need the top of the key. We're gonna take a knee
[00:03:24] And we're gonna work through perseverance be that stands for perseverance, okay?
[00:03:34] The coach is speaking don't make me go to the whistle directly in your ear again. I will do that. I have deafened nine
[00:03:40] Camp campers Nick throws I call me they call me nine deaf Johnny
[00:03:45] He's a because I've deafened he's a permanently deafened students of this basketball camp with my whistle
[00:03:52] Alright continue speaking out of turn well while I have dictated that we are taking a knee at the top of the key
[00:03:58] Okay, perseverance P stands for perseverance. I know what you're gonna say you can't spell perseverance without P in there
[00:04:05] Right, yeah, you can't define a word with the word. Yes, you can how through perseverance. All right, you persevere you keep doing
[00:04:12] All right, what's so P he stands for perseverance. What's perseverance stand for? Let's work through it the P
[00:04:17] The B okay, so that one also stands for perseverance. Okay, okay, so you're just doing no quest triple perseverance
[00:04:23] We'll take questions at the end. Okay. Thank you coach. So it's perseverance perseverance
[00:04:28] Perseverance it's like when you look into a mirror and there's a mirror behind you and it's an
[00:04:32] Forever do you ask questions then no you shut the fuck up you pretend you're in a cool tunnel from the matrix
[00:04:39] High in your grandma's bathroom where she has that two mirror setup and you fucking you stay in there
[00:04:44] You eat a lot of think about why you didn't finish community college, you know, what I do is I
[00:04:50] For $20 a night because your parents know you won't get a real job. Mm-hmm
[00:04:55] So they made up grandparents baby. So that's perseverance. Okay. Yeah, that's what the P stands
[00:04:59] Yeah, okay, even after she begged for you to leave
[00:05:01] Yeah, stop taking your Viking and you persevered and you fucking did the job
[00:05:05] He stands for energy you got to have energy if you want to persevere. How do you do that? You drink Red Bulls before ever again
[00:05:11] You got a step you got it. No Red Bulls are are no per we haven't gotten to the R
[00:05:17] We're talking about energy energy R Red Bull. No, we're going through the whole word first of all
[00:05:21] You're not you're only an assistant coach and only because that's the only title we have for council
[00:05:27] We're here you're in charge of handing out the brownies in the cafeteria stavros
[00:05:31] Lunch as part of the not a lunch ball camp sounds like you're a lunch. I'm not a lunch lady. I
[00:05:36] Got brought this do lunch ladies who have cool hair nets. Let's continue. Let's continue our rifle
[00:05:44] Yes, our stands for retarded kids we allow retard it's in the basketball camp
[00:05:49] You if you may have a retarded cousin or retarded brother and say I wish you could participate in basketball camp
[00:05:54] I want everyone to take a look at the child in the wheelchair
[00:05:57] Mm-hmm, you know he can say he can persevere and say I'm not retarded. Mm-hmm. Well, we we know with those legs
[00:06:03] You should go to murder ball camp. You should go to murder ball camp. Unfortunately. They don't have that
[00:06:07] That's only for pissed off CrossFit
[00:06:12] You gotta be going for guys faking you gotta be real pissed off wheelchair guy to get into murder ball
[00:06:17] Mm-hmm. Can you be a guy that can use your legs and do murder ball? Yeah, pick you out. Mm-hmm
[00:06:22] If you don't take you out. There's one guy. There's one guy. But the top of his body doesn't work
[00:06:27] So he's just wearing legs with a limp. Oh, yeah shoots with his lips top. Yeah
[00:06:34] What happens when Adam gets head
[00:06:36] Perseverance S from a woman cuz he stands for sex guys stop having sex with girls from the girls camp
[00:06:42] It's bad for bad in the bathroom bad for the knees you keep coming on the floor
[00:06:46] The old black guy that's been working here for 40 years yells at me because he's got to clean it up
[00:06:51] Mm-hmm, all right. Are you scared of basketball coach?
[00:06:54] I shouldn't have to deal with janitors. Are you scared of the janitor? Of course I
[00:06:59] Confused him for Wilte Chamberlain the first day
[00:07:02] Because he was when I was when I was surveying the venue. I said oh my god
[00:07:07] Mr. Chamberlain it's so nice to meet you. Yeah, he's like he was insulted by that. Mm-hmm. I mean he is 5'11
[00:07:13] He's a 5 foot 3
[00:07:17] He's actually he's I found out later
[00:07:20] Pacific Islander. Yes, he's Filipino. He's not he's not he's a different kind of black. Yeah. Yep
[00:07:28] His name is Sal Marcos, but he's he's a Spanish name black
[00:07:33] Is Asian Filipinos are black wines, right?
[00:07:36] Filipinos have Spanish names, but they're Asian. They're the party Asians
[00:07:41] Perseverance that okay S e actually I changed my mind the s and e stands for Cedric the entertainer
[00:07:47] The other man I thought the janitor was after he told me that he was not
[00:07:59] Retarded again
[00:08:01] No, no what's her personally perseverance or perseverance right? I think there's another persevere
[00:08:09] Perseverance
[00:08:11] Perseveral alright, so Pete doesn't ask as stands for spelling is
[00:08:16] Unnecessary
[00:08:20] Spelling is unnecessary
[00:08:27] Okay, so are again, I think and then a V our stands for persevere real time with bill Mar okay
[00:08:34] It's a great show guys you should watch it. It's for in-your-face Democrats like me the coach of basketball
[00:08:40] Yeah, come town basketball camp where everyone is welcome especially retarded kids who are actually better than us
[00:08:47] They're better than you guys you may think look you may look at me and you say that guy's the teacher
[00:08:53] He can see if I'm gonna learn anything in here. It's gonna be from the coach
[00:08:56] Well, I want you all to take a look at the retarded kids in the class. Mm-hmm because they're the real teachers
[00:09:02] You think they're better than thick women
[00:09:04] Yeah, yeah, do they what's is their retarded boy magic? That's my next BuzzFeed
[00:09:18] By Danish words they're calling this the article that is going to heal America
[00:09:28] After the riots in Charlottesville, there's one article that's healing the nation
[00:09:32] Our retarded kids better than thick women
[00:09:37] It's true the white nationalists were for thick women and the alt-left no
[00:09:46] Guys come on not just don't like thick look I'm trying to get out of here by for married to thick women
[00:09:51] Are you serious? No, they've they've they've they've gone past thick. No, they're there. There is what we call hot
[00:09:57] Raimin they're married to fat women. They're married to fat women. They're married to fat women
[00:10:00] That's like how body positive like how Ashley Graham is like supposed to be fat, but she's just hot as shit
[00:10:07] Yeah, she's that's what a thick. Yeah. I think is is pretty stop jacks off the London Andrews
[00:10:13] The woman that's like morbidly obese, but they're like she's a model. She probably has my she probably weighs like
[00:10:20] 6,000 pounds. I'm not exaggerating
[00:10:22] First of all, that's no exaggeration
[00:10:28] There's zero hyperbole 2000 of those pounds are probably just ink from all of her like sailor Jerry tattoos
[00:10:34] Okay. Yeah, it's like it's like, you know Betty Paige. She's like Betty novel, right?
[00:10:41] She's a bunch of that's actually good Betty Crocker page. Okay, that's not as good
[00:10:47] All right, I'm a fuck. Yeah, I'm in no she's she's she's
[00:10:56] Alright back to basketball camp. Whoa, I don't know I'm kind of now that I started it kind of in here
[00:11:02] I kind of like being basketball coach
[00:11:05] Yeah, guys. We got more letters to go. Sorry. Take a fucking. I'm on my knee. God damn it
[00:11:10] You talked about thick women. What do you want me to do? I didn't bring that up. You're phone away
[00:11:14] Let's do basketball one of your one of your one of the one of the campers
[00:11:19] That's a lot of air camper Adam. Yeah, I will fucking deafen you with this whistle
[00:11:26] Listen to happen. Oh my god. Yeah, I'm in on London Andrews coach. I tried to burn me
[00:11:31] But I'm sorry coach. I'm really enjoying my time here at Auschwitz basketball
[00:11:38] The V stands for I mean come on victory. That's the goal in basketball
[00:11:43] You want to fuck that other lady. What's your face?
[00:11:47] Randolin, you don't want to fuck London Andrews. I
[00:11:51] Think what's hotter?
[00:11:53] How do you see I'm confusing London Andrews with somebody else? Maybe I guess I think I'm your time
[00:11:58] Maybe the mom
[00:12:01] That's a different person bro. She is hot unless she lost like 400 pounds
[00:12:05] Oh my god off I'm legitimate get off your goddamn phone
[00:12:13] No phones in basketball camp. That's what the V stands for
[00:12:16] Let's get the phone
[00:12:19] We get about the
[00:12:22] Okay, so that's the V
[00:12:24] ANCE
[00:12:26] stands for the next E stands for energy it's time for another red bull guess why we just finished the first quarter of the
[00:12:33] Longass word. Yeah, yes or V. Well, you got persevere. You got to go to the second is the second R Red Bull then
[00:12:38] Yeah, I press the very through this bit. There's another R. Yeah, persevere in no per sir
[00:12:44] Yeah, the one it stands for another Red Bull. That's what he's the ER. Stand for another R
[00:12:50] Persevere
[00:12:51] VER
[00:12:53] Okay, a nce. I think bring it home. Oh, okay, I can't see I can't spell hence persevere ends. No, you're right
[00:13:00] It's yeah, persevere ends. Okay
[00:13:05] How many lenses is this weird? It's the longest word ever. Oh and then and then ANCE stands for also not Cedric the entertainer
[00:13:15] When I made the mistake of confusing one of the black children's parents
[00:13:22] And that's perseverance guys Wow, I will never wait that's the first
[00:13:26] There's two right because that's the P
[00:13:30] We accepted it right see two more
[00:13:34] In the mirror world over the mirror world remember there's two more
[00:13:37] I don't know guys basketball camps over everyone get back in your Toyota previous and back home
[00:13:43] Thanks, coach. I can't tell you how much I've learned here
[00:13:47] while camp and
[00:13:49] I appreciate you molesting me less than Adam coach. Yeah, there's not a molestation camp
[00:13:54] I'm covered in drywall dust. Oh, yeah, me too, dude. Oh
[00:13:58] Yeah, I mean break. Do you ever go to a sports camp Adam? I went to tennis camp once and my dad yelled at me
[00:14:07] When he picked me up is day camp and I went to basketball camp for two weeks at the end of the day
[00:14:12] They were like everyone pick up the tennis balls and then everyone started scrambling running really hard trying to pick up as
[00:14:18] Many as possible. That's what camp was a fucking nightmare, dude. How old were you?
[00:14:23] I don't know like eight. Oh, that's tough. You're a little as kid
[00:14:27] You're not strong. I was older than the other kids on my shoe from the waist say for some reason get this
[00:14:32] I think I was in fourth grade going into fifth grade
[00:14:34] I was in a basketball camp and then I
[00:14:38] Went because like my cousin was going my cousin was good at basketball and like I was I think it's your black cousin
[00:14:44] No, my my your Jewish cousin. Yeah, yeah, and they my mom sent me to my mom sent me to stay with them for like two
[00:14:52] Three weeks at summer. Okay, so I was just like staying in New York with them and
[00:14:57] Basketball. Yeah, so he went to basketball camp
[00:14:59] So I went to basketball camp with him and I'm terrible at basketball right?
[00:15:03] It was like a source of shame for this fat bull cut Nick. No, I wasn't fat at the time
[00:15:07] I didn't get fat until I was only fat for like two years. Oh, okay. Yeah, but it is bull cut
[00:15:12] Yeah, I mean I had a bull cut until like 2013
[00:15:18] Okay, so
[00:15:20] But you're bad at sports. Yeah
[00:15:23] I was okay baseball, but yeah basketball was always difficult for me
[00:15:28] Mm-hmm. I could never cross I could never like cross over dribble through my legs
[00:15:31] And that was the only thing to fucking matter. It's cool shooting is not difficult
[00:15:34] But like I had no ball handling skills. Oh, yeah
[00:15:38] Getting a good in between the leg dribble is one way of looking cool. Oh, it looks cool as shit
[00:15:43] We can go back and forth between both of them. Oh very cool little behind the back very cool. Yeah
[00:15:48] I love it behind the back. No, okay, I told this story on the podcast
[00:15:53] They called me Adam white chocolate Friedland when I was in basketball
[00:15:55] You wish there was everyone was white where you played that they called me Cadillac white chocolate Friedland you were I was
[00:16:01] Cadillac I was escalated your cat
[00:16:04] You're a player except well escalate rules here. Are you Claire? No, I was just going for his pills Barry. Yeah, you know escalate
[00:16:10] He rules man as Spanish shit died. I think no, maybe I'm wrong
[00:16:15] No, I told the story before you did I think you did but yeah with the kid who had elephantiasis in his finger
[00:16:22] Yes, so he's like you had this giant like we're number one finger and he spin the ball on it
[00:16:27] That would be cool. That'd be sick
[00:16:29] What's the point of even having a man if you had a giant finger and then on top of it
[00:16:34] He could have the like a like that globe from Scarface. Yeah, the world is yours very cool
[00:16:39] It'd be cool. You think you could fuck if you have a finger that big you could probably fuck like it's a dick was it dick sized?
[00:16:46] I don't know man. Why you're fucking stupid mind it. That's all you think about
[00:16:50] I'm you don't think if you have a dick sized finger
[00:16:53] You don't even consider putting it in a pussy
[00:16:55] Honestly, no because you know what and I again we already talked about this on the podcast
[00:16:59] But I told Norman Wilkerson that story about that poor disabled boy
[00:17:03] And Norman at age probably 49 at the time was like
[00:17:07] Cackling he's like that's the funniest thing I've ever heard a boy with a disability
[00:17:13] And me and him spent the day I think yeah, I forget what we were doing
[00:17:17] We were helping like my roommates at the time going to some framing place nice and me and Norman were sitting in the car coming up
[00:17:22] With different jokes about that kid's finger
[00:17:25] Norman goes. Yeah, he really loves finger painting one time. He did the whole living room
[00:17:31] That's good. Yeah, you roasted that little fucking kid. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You think his fingers the same size now
[00:17:36] Yeah, you use his parents got him a Chinese finger trap
[00:17:41] But they want to save money. So they just took a traffic cone off the street. Mm-hmm. That's good. Yeah, that's clever
[00:17:47] Yes, I think it's more clever than stuff like that. Yeah, I don't like like two hours in retrospect none of them were funny
[00:17:54] That was that's a Norman Walker sent original he asked me not to mention him. I said to Norman
[00:17:59] Will you broke his rule I broke his rule. Well, we all respect he looks he looks kind of like
[00:18:03] Colonel Sandbix incredibly highly of Norman. I fuck with Norman. I met Norman a couple times. I was a winner. I was a good dude
[00:18:09] Yes, yeah, he's funny
[00:18:11] Yeah, and then we got to be careful about mentioning people that asked not to be mentioned considering patreon is now
[00:18:18] kicking off bad boys
[00:18:21] Well, yeah, if you try and like get refugees or whatever. No, they kicked off like a
[00:18:27] News service. Yeah, like a like a antifa news. Oh, really? Yeah
[00:18:32] What did they do anything bad? I mean if it's right I'm going to go eat a step sex with children. We're done
[00:18:37] Yeah, I'm not I'm gonna go date them. I'm not if whatever happens happen bringing chocolates to a
[00:18:43] There's not a Todd Barry joke where he's like I've always wanted to go to Thailand on vacation
[00:18:48] But anytime an adult man says he goes to
[00:18:53] Yeah, what is some other Todd Barry jokes?
[00:18:56] Now you're now you're
[00:18:58] Dealing is by quoting now citing your sources. Yeah, he's really good joke about organizing your closet. What is it?
[00:19:06] I used to have I used to have a Cambodia joke about going to Cambodia. That was a good joke
[00:19:11] It ends with a low info cow or something
[00:19:14] No, the joke was like a rock
[00:19:16] It was Nate Barghatsy just also had a joke about going to Cambodia and blowing up a cow with a rocket launcher
[00:19:21] Whoa, which the joke was a different direction
[00:19:24] With it, but it's like so why would you because it's such a like an obscure reference to do a joke about that it feels
[00:19:32] I see what you're saying. It's so strange. Yeah
[00:19:36] I guess if I don't do it a stand-up anymore. Just do it on the show. Yeah, there you go the bit was about
[00:19:42] You know if you go to Cambodia everyone thinks you're gonna fuck a boy
[00:19:46] It's like the only reason to go to Cambodia, but well that just sounds like that Todd Barry
[00:19:50] Well, I mean that's like it not a particularly original observation. Yeah, I don't think that that's a very good joke
[00:19:59] It's a set up for a joke. Yeah, so that's fired
[00:20:03] Not at me and Todd Barry you and your writer Todd Barry
[00:20:14] Well, yeah, if you're gonna go to Cambodia
[00:20:16] You know what they got there is they got a fucking a place where you can blow up a cow with a rocket launcher
[00:20:21] You also have a place you can throw a grenade and a lake and fire like a fully automatic
[00:20:26] Like a machine gun at a car. It's like after all that you expect me to just fuck like a regular prostitute
[00:20:34] I'm gonna fuck a boy
[00:20:36] Thanks for giving me the fake laugh. I like I think it's funny heard that joke probably 400 times
[00:20:41] But I'm a generous laugh run. I forgot the the strat the I think it's a joke and I think I think it was
[00:20:52] Saying you don't go to universal studios and get your picture taken on the tea cups, right?
[00:20:56] Right, you go on Disneyland. Yeah, okay. Well, whatever. Sorry to nitpick. I'm really serious about Disney stuff
[00:21:03] Yeah, me too. I got really depressed. There was this guy
[00:21:06] I went to high school with who really like he was the salutatorian the class two years before ahead of me
[00:21:11] And he really wanted to be a blue men group blue blue men group the salutator
[00:21:16] The second the sonic tour in salutatorian. What's the name of the guy that gets like the worst grades?
[00:21:23] the coolest the
[00:21:25] School Mongoloid we get magna cum retarda. Yeah
[00:21:30] There we go. Yes, brother
[00:21:32] Brother yeah
[00:21:34] Hold on a lot magna cum retarda
[00:21:39] What do they call that dude
[00:21:41] Hi, you know what I'm saying enough what do they call it God and fucking he does the worst
[00:21:47] Yeah, I graduated wears magnums comes loudly
[00:21:51] Whatever a big joke for you when you're in school. Yeah, I did graduate magna cum laude
[00:21:55] And I said that all the time my fucking shit actually didn't graduate. I walked I never actually finished my degree college
[00:22:01] Yeah, I have to I still need two language credits. We could do that. I speak Greek. I could take a test
[00:22:07] I just don't care
[00:22:08] Well, I think it's too late. I want to see that diploma stuff. Yeah, you know Greek, you know pig Latin, you know regular pig
[00:22:17] Stop speaks point
[00:22:19] Anyway, this kid used to dress up like blue man group every year for Halloween
[00:22:24] Oh, because his dream was being in blue man group. It's got it can't be that hard
[00:22:28] What he found out he found out senior year?
[00:22:32] He's about five seven and he found out you have to be like between five ten and six two. Oh, no
[00:22:37] And he cried he cried at school what a stupid dream this poor kid. Yeah
[00:22:42] That's what I think you got into Stanford or something. Yeah, it's really good. It's really good. It's he's got to be all right now
[00:22:47] No, he like he I looked him up and it's actually most alt-right back story. I've ever heard of my yeah
[00:22:53] Yeah, it was too short to be
[00:22:55] I
[00:22:57] He's fucking I hate this world
[00:23:01] Donald Trump oh also I'm doing things for guys like me guys over two shorts being the blue man group
[00:23:07] How dare they take down that statue of Robert E Lee?
[00:23:11] No, Raven's man. They would have lent Robert E Lee in the blue man group
[00:23:17] That is true too much here. I feel better. No, so I think he also I remember he said he like it was a Monday after a weekend
[00:23:24] He was like I lost my virginity this weekend out of sex club. Oh, yeah, sex club. Yeah. Yeah, he's just fucking some
[00:23:33] Leathery tits it was a husband watches. Yeah
[00:23:39] He's he's like skinny, but he's got that pouchy belly some guy with a ponch jacked up
[00:23:44] Yeah, I guess we got to talk about charlotte's fill at some point right you gotta open up that yeah
[00:23:49] They need our they need our take
[00:23:51] Really need our take wait. Let me finish so I looked him up on Facebook and
[00:23:56] He is now a and I forgot the actual term. It's it's basically guest
[00:24:03] experience
[00:24:05] Coordinator and Disney World Resort. Oh
[00:24:08] Hell yeah, yeah, so now he works at Disney World you think he like started like the many blue man group of
[00:24:16] Smurfs
[00:24:20] Get in
[00:24:26] Can get that surgery where they break your legs and then extend them yeah, he's close
[00:24:31] He's what that surgery. Yeah, please don't fucking fuck with the back of that
[00:24:38] People sitting there because it's a hole in your finger in it. Yeah, please don't put your finger in that hole and fuck up the speaker
[00:24:45] What about my I gotta say you were a lot more polite to stop just
[00:24:49] Because I didn't recognize that it was a thing that everybody is well, you know what it was the first time
[00:24:54] It makes also I didn't touch the wire you're on the second then the second first of all
[00:24:59] I didn't touch the wire me one I fingered the speaker pussy I figure the speaker pussy
[00:25:03] You were grabbing it wires. He couldn't even see if I was grabbing it while I could see that you're grabbing
[00:25:07] Why are you dirty rat you dirty rat?
[00:25:10] You dirty rat dirty rat dirty rat put my cock okay?
[00:25:13] How about this we put the speakers on a full volume fucking cock and we put our cock's in this that would feel good to
[00:25:19] Believe my fucking you take that when you take the right when I take the left one
[00:25:22] Do you think ever if we ever got in a position of real power we do one of those?
[00:25:29] Two penises in the vagina one in the asshole kind of boy. That's interesting as a bonding
[00:25:34] I think we could all potentially fuck the same person. I want I want to be I want to be jacked off while standing next to the
[00:25:50] Full suit
[00:25:52] Under the nightstand
[00:25:58] And but me and Adam are still sharing the pussy that's why I think that that's why I think that
[00:26:04] Asperger's people are so good at three sims and polyamory because they're it's a puzzle. They don't make eye contact
[00:26:11] No, it's a puzzle. It's a man guy. That's good too. I like your I'm sorry for stepping on it. Well, that's
[00:26:15] Oh now you're leaving and Nick's taking the drink of water, huh?
[00:26:23] Yeah, I don't know
[00:26:24] I think asperger's people in general are freakier with sex shit because it's like they take the emotion out of it
[00:26:29] Do I think so I don't know I was at work and then I overheard some girl say I
[00:26:37] Love fucking autistic guys. Oh nice. Oh, yeah, I've heard that take before yeah
[00:26:41] I love fucking guys with Asper. Yeah, nice, which is weird. Well, they probably fuck like I said
[00:26:47] They there's no emotion. They take it mechanically. They leave their socks and shoes on absolutely
[00:26:53] Completely naked but with like trainers and yes very good grip
[00:26:58] That's a black guy thing. Yeah, I'm not I'm not gonna crease my Jordans for this. Yeah
[00:27:04] Of
[00:27:06] Iana was saying telling a story about how one time
[00:27:09] Some guy she was fucking stopped and put on
[00:27:27] Yeah, but for fucking apparently yeah, I've never I don't think I've you weren't I guess I have worn shoes well fucking
[00:27:34] I don't know you've never like fucked outside or I've worn a t-shirt
[00:27:39] I guess in a how is that equivalent in a car? No, I like to have sex naked call me old-fashioned horse
[00:27:46] Yeah, but I mean fuck fuck public of course you're gonna be fully clothed. Yeah
[00:27:52] Like a behind-a-dumpster
[00:27:56] Am I am I am I preferred?
[00:27:59] I've heard a venue of having sex it behind the dumpster
[00:28:04] anywhere
[00:28:05] Yeah, why people be like zip?
[00:28:08] They're fly down and have sex through the Facebook post from Kinfolk Collective
[00:28:13] That's like y'all couldn't wait to martyr that white woman that died in Charlottesville, huh? Oh
[00:28:18] That was the absolute worst take of all. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's why daily storm or whatever got no not daily storm
[00:28:25] Or a storm front got kicked off a go daddy because they called that woman a slut. Yeah. Yeah, they were like
[00:28:32] She's a slut and we're glad she's dead. What's she doing? Was she even a slot though? She was protesting
[00:28:39] Yeah, there was a woman with a pussy
[00:28:43] She was one with a pussy and it might have been a little open and I was saying that's just a theory that Mr. James Fields
[00:28:49] What if what if we find out that he was trying to run over the statue
[00:29:02] For everybody yes, it truly would be
[00:29:07] He went there to run over the statue with his car
[00:29:10] Uh-huh and if they hadn't been counter protesting no it is chill that you can
[00:29:15] Wear combat fatigues and have semi-automatic weapons and just not be a threat to cops
[00:29:22] Also, aren't those weapons like a lot of money what air 15s and sure 15s and shit
[00:29:28] We always call them like like poor Hicks and stuff, but like those guys are wearing like full body armor AR 15
[00:29:34] I mean that shit costs money, but like 20 grand worth of shit. Yeah, that's the kind of shit like I mean
[00:29:39] What else they buying? Yeah, right exactly you can be really
[00:29:43] Have like one expensive thing for some people with guns. I guess or you know, I guess so I got I mean
[00:29:49] I'm just saying that maybe maybe they're not I think it's stupid to say that all alt-right or whatever people are poor
[00:29:56] Well, they're not they're not all poor are you jealous of their poverty? No, they've nice
[00:30:01] Of their their that guy got fired the earth that guy got fired from a hot dog restaurant
[00:30:06] He's a good
[00:30:14] You know that under armor polo you know that shit was waking away moisture. Oh, yeah, you know saying dry as fuck
[00:30:20] Absolutely
[00:30:21] Like doctors and polo posting blurry photos of people on there and alike this guy is name is Brad Smith
[00:30:28] I found someone that vaguely looks like him on Facebook everybody. I'm sure they're blaming the wrong people of course
[00:30:34] Dude, and it's funny that like there's one guy that looks like Nick. Yeah. Yeah, it wasn't me. Okay. Yeah
[00:30:40] I wasn't I was team was basketball. He was skinny. He wasn't fat. That was a good leg. It looks like sexy
[00:30:45] You already lost race is in fact. I'm losing way too quickly. I got a fucking dial of back
[00:30:49] You lost 20 pounds in three three two or three pounds. Oh, okay. How the fuck did you miss her?
[00:30:56] two or three twenty
[00:30:58] He's so far away in this room. I let's shoot Nick wouldn't allow us to sit on the same couch as him
[00:31:04] Yeah, no, no, it's fat ass needs an entire here we go. Yeah, that ass Nick fat fat
[00:31:10] Hey, maybe you speak big Latin. I don't I still have better body composition
[00:31:17] No
[00:31:19] Yeah, yeah
[00:31:21] Yeah, anyway, so yeah, we're the violence in Charlottesville, you know
[00:31:25] Let's fuck up. Well, I don't know. Yeah, I mean I
[00:31:29] About sat somebody posted somebody posted a picture. This is really about somebody on Instagram
[00:31:34] They're like oh, this is the guy from the from the fucking thing
[00:31:37] And I commented it was like a comic
[00:31:39] I don't want to go into it, but they posted it and I was like yeah
[00:31:42] You shouldn't really do this because even it doesn't matter that you saw like some article that says this is the fucking guy like there is a
[00:31:50] History of people fucking this up and blaming the wrong people
[00:31:53] Yeah, what about the guy in Dallas who they said was the black lives matter is right mark
[00:31:58] Who's life got destroyed? I can't remember that guys. Yeah
[00:32:01] Basically and then the Dallas police department left the fucking tweet up three days, right?
[00:32:05] Yeah, for their fucking feet. Yeah, it's like like this the reason those both are fucking the reason those cops got shot
[00:32:12] Is because matter is because the police make it clear that they don't give a shit about black people
[00:32:17] Right, you're gonna leave a fucking tweet up accusing somebody was unbelievable
[00:32:21] It's that's that is like an egregious fucking display of of how
[00:32:27] Little respect you have for you know a human be I think they arrested the real shooter and they still had it up for days for days
[00:32:34] Yeah, anyhow
[00:32:36] But no the best example of that is the boss in marathon thing that the red at brown kid
[00:32:42] Sunil tri-patty who's a student at Brown not that he was he was also a brown person
[00:32:46] Mmm, but he like went missing a lot more using himself, right?
[00:32:51] And then you know read it as like we figured it out we fat lease off the case
[00:32:56] We're better than the police are because we post you know, and it's a cool website people are harassing the fucking
[00:33:03] You know family the kid or whatever
[00:33:06] And it turns and BuzzFeed reported on it at least one of the reporters fucking tweeted it out great
[00:33:11] Like yeah, this is who it is there's also some guy named Mike something that they accused of being the fucking you know
[00:33:17] The Boston Marathon bomber, but it's people think oh well, you know that can't that happens once so what do you do?
[00:33:22] I mean you don't do anything you don't embrace vigilante justice. That's what you do you fucking let the cops
[00:33:28] They caught a fine people that cops broke laws
[00:33:31] The cops already arrested the guy that drove through the thing and I'm sorry
[00:33:34] Demonstrating isn't a fucking crime so if somebody broke the law. Yeah sure have them arrested
[00:33:40] But like this idea that you're gonna take a blurry photo and then just randomly accused people
[00:33:45] No, you're fucking absolutely wrong if you think I I'm not saying anyway, first of all what did I say?
[00:33:51] I said you rolled your eyes you said what are you going to do?
[00:33:54] What I'm not saying you should do it
[00:33:56] I'm saying it's fucked because like I feel it
[00:33:59] I want to know who the fuck Nazis are then should there should be some way like I guess they're making it obvious who they are
[00:34:04] But it's like I know it's demonstrating but they're fucking not they're talking about killing they want a fucking white state
[00:34:10] Like it's different than other demonstrations
[00:34:12] It really fucking is demonstrations have been going on forever
[00:34:15] There's never been my entire life. There's been white nationalist demonstrations in the United States
[00:34:21] I like that. Yes like that dude. Yes
[00:34:24] They fucking the American Nazi party was active 10 years ago. Yeah, but they had demonstrations the KKK has
[00:34:31] Demonstrations fucking things can't do that since Trump won the shit is Trump won the different type of of those guys
[00:34:39] Yeah, I say that white nationalists haven't existed. Do they don't exist is not true. I mean like Timothy McVay
[00:34:46] Who's like pretty much attached to loosely for sure?
[00:34:49] You know, I mean to say that he's not a white Nash or that there isn't some white nationalist aspect to the Oklahoma City bombing
[00:34:55] I mean it was more of a problem 20 years ago than it is now
[00:34:59] Right, but those demonstrations. Yeah those demonstrations have a city's count maybe but it's still a fucking huge problem
[00:35:06] No, I think there's more attention placed on it culturally because that's hot on the internet and because of the election and because of this alt-right
[00:35:12] Things and because the president is yeah the people in the white hat
[00:35:15] I mean fucking yes, but that's a different way hard way different issue
[00:35:18] You're talking about like these demonstrations and what's happening on a on a cultural level with just people and like ultimately
[00:35:26] The people who go to protest a statue being taken down in Charlottesville are like, you know
[00:35:32] Other than the guy that drove his fucking car through a crowd right counter protesters
[00:35:36] They're just fucking making noise, you know, yeah and important part if you want to get people
[00:35:42] I'll never like I'll never embrace the idea of we got to find this guy
[00:35:46] We got to get people fired because I don't like the idea of getting people fired as a method of punishment in in any way
[00:35:53] Yeah, regardless of what you do. Oh, we need to
[00:35:57] They're dead you're gonna get fired and then gonna be like well, you know what I'm not racist of course not
[00:36:02] But it's also like a shitty tactic to embrace is getting sure it tactic is shitty
[00:36:06] But there is a market difference between someone who says a joke you don't like and someone who's fucking you know
[00:36:13] You want to be at my school your kids school to be a Nazi like at that rally? I don't have a kid
[00:36:18] Well, you know like a theory, but the ones there's a big difference between somebody like a joke and fucking having a fucking swastika
[00:36:26] At a thing about a Confederate flag of course. I'm not saying there isn't a difference
[00:36:30] But I'm saying on principle. I don't right right right you don't like the idea and like either you embrace that or you don't and
[00:36:38] There's that and that's what having principles. Yes, that's that's what it then principles are stupid because maybe they are then fine
[00:36:45] But then don't act like you're fucking hold on because people do the same shit with like
[00:36:50] With the death penalty. Oh, I don't support I would never support the death penalty unless it's fucking you know Hitler
[00:36:56] Yeah, well not even Hitler like you I don't
[00:37:00] Name the the char the Charleston kid
[00:37:05] Dylan roof when Dylan roof got the death penalty people say oh normally I don't support the death penalty
[00:37:09] But I do in this case well that means you support the death penalty
[00:37:11] He's gonna get a fan of the death penalty
[00:37:13] You want the death penalty to happen if there's certain if there's certain situations where you support the death penalty
[00:37:19] Then you support the death penalty don't pretend like you don't I
[00:37:23] Understand if you don't have to say this there's a certain point it crosses in which I support people being fired for
[00:37:30] Expressing something then you support people being fired for expressing something
[00:37:35] Yeah, don't shy away from it
[00:37:36] But just like just admit that that's what yeah when it could lead to violence the same way the freedom of speech thing
[00:37:41] We're freedom of speech ends, you know, I being a fucking Nazis the same as yelling fire in a crowded no
[00:37:47] It's not I don't agree with that
[00:37:49] I think it is man because you're talking about your your ideology is saying directly
[00:37:53] I want these people gone now fucking Richard Spencer whatever saying oh, I don't hate anybody or whatever
[00:37:58] They're saying I don't want to murder them personally
[00:38:00] So what the black Israelites that say we need to kill all white people you would have no problem with the police coming and
[00:38:05] That's just cool, dude. Yeah, I know I don't have a problem with it
[00:38:08] But I'm saying like they why would you set a precedent of making certain types of speech illegal?
[00:38:13] Yeah, don't do it. It's good. Do it because it's eventually the guys you do like are going to say the same fucking thing
[00:38:20] You're right. That's a good point. No, absolutely. I think you're right about that emotional fuck
[00:38:24] I don't know man. It's fucked up the fucking president is like he's obviously it's fucking emotional
[00:38:30] But that's why justice and laws should be sort of removed motion right you're right you're right about no
[00:38:35] That was like I agree with what you said. Yeah, it's just I it's fucking weird dude like
[00:38:41] I mean theory you're against hate crimes legislation because you're like murders murder, right? Well the
[00:38:47] Hate crime hate crime laws are sort of they're they're
[00:38:52] correcting a
[00:38:53] flaw in the system that's
[00:38:55] Expressed through systemic racism if you're a black guy and you murder a white guy you're gonna get the maximum penalty
[00:39:00] Mm-hmm. If you're a white guy and you're you murder if you're a white woman that murders a black guy
[00:39:05] You're probably not even gonna go to jail unless you're you're hot unless they yeah if it's a hot white woman
[00:39:10] Murders a black guy you're not get a reality TV show right come on. She's you know
[00:39:15] I mean if you didn't have hate crime laws and it wouldn't be equal sentence. I mean I kind of I mean
[00:39:22] I don't I don't even really believe that like justice exists. No, it doesn't right
[00:39:29] So I mean to say like oh well if we if we kill this person then we'll all feel better
[00:39:35] I mean we certainly want a society it might like
[00:39:38] alleviate some of the the pain or help in the grief process for the immediate family of whatever victim, you know
[00:39:44] If it's a murder or whatever, it's not benefiting society. Yeah, I mean I don't know it does no no impact on crime rates
[00:39:50] Right, you know also you could just make their life horrible
[00:39:53] Like if you get that $5 foot long torturing people, but I just mean like you you're in prison for life
[00:39:59] It's shitty, you know what I mean like it's not
[00:40:02] It's not a good outcome. Yep, and you're getting that $5. Yes, that's true about the footlong. Yeah, I mean if you're like
[00:40:10] Thinking about like efficacy of like any kind of punishment or whatever
[00:40:15] like really
[00:40:16] Penal colonies work better than anything send them to Australia. Yeah, let them live don't you don't torture anybody
[00:40:22] You just say okay. We can't be a member of our society
[00:40:25] So you can go live here. Here's there's some kind of infrastructure or whatever, you know, where do we send them?
[00:40:32] Jersey
[00:40:34] Oh, dude, I think the larger point and I'm sure a lot of our fans are gonna love this is that the is that racism is being has been used?
[00:40:57] Oh, fuck it. I'm done. I don't know. I mean I don't want to get to see you have to do things like that because sometimes the show is not gonna be funny
[00:41:03] Specifically when we bring up to Charleston right right we have to talk about it. This is a political show
[00:41:09] To say that you're not political right now is is to is privileged that's privileged
[00:41:16] It's true your privilege to say that you know, you're if you're not posting if you're not retweeting
[00:41:21] A woke accounts constantly and you're not politically active like I am by
[00:41:25] Saying things on social media to get a bunch of likes being a political activist the way I am that's privilege
[00:41:31] It's actually it's privileged to not be a brand building self-grantizing, you know
[00:41:38] I'm socialist hero stavas socialist and nick is chaos actor joker Heath Ledger
[00:41:45] So that's where we're coming from I consider myself to be more of like the
[00:41:50] Romulan school
[00:41:53] Is rom he's the one who fucked up remiss? No, Romulan's well. Yes, Romulan's Romulan's
[00:41:59] Remiss from Rome from Rome right Rome origins
[00:42:04] Twins that fucked each other. Yes in the womb all of Italy. Yep
[00:42:10] Entire landmass is just right and actually come out of remiss's ass made Sicily. Yeah, and that's why the songs are dark and yay
[00:42:19] You know, you're part ass ass eggplant. They're punished. Yeah. Yeah, you put him eggplant in his ass
[00:42:25] Dark all of this guy. Can you believe him? I'm part eggplant. Um,
[00:42:31] That's good. Yeah, we gotta take a break. Okay. Okay
[00:42:35] Well folks, you know what time it is
[00:42:37] It's the underwear segment of the show nip maulin here for mac weldon underwear
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[00:43:16] Which means you don't have to bathe anymore. They'll suck all the dirt out of your shitty body
[00:43:20] And uh, and you won't smell
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[00:43:57] So go to macweldon.com and get 20 off using promo code comtown and get yourself some new underwear. Thanks folks
[00:44:05] And we're back on the show
[00:44:09] Mm-hmm. I think I don't know if anything happened during the break. I don't know we uh yeah, Adam smoked it to sigrad
[00:44:15] We really lost steam. I'm kind of tired now. I'm tired from doing man's. I had to think for like three minutes
[00:44:23] There's another wall that's got to come down. Yep. We're gonna go back there after the show do them with some more people or prop
[00:44:28] You go into the deeps. Yeah. Oh, how do you need more stuff? There's some aviation snips. Yeah those we should get goggles too
[00:44:35] She uh sheet metal. Oh nice. Yeah, it's my aluminum studs. Oh, we cut through
[00:44:41] Mm-hmm. Fuck dude. I want to put up some shelves and shit in my room. I want to mount the tv to my wall
[00:44:47] Yeah, I'm really trying to get the room popping
[00:44:49] Yeah, I want to get it. Are you gonna do porno and the big tv in your course? That's so sick and it's also red
[00:44:55] It's dim red. I don't know if I could jack off to big screen porno
[00:44:59] I don't it would feel wrong
[00:45:02] I'm used to it on phone screens right like it right right you know we beat off a phone so much computer
[00:45:08] It took a while to get adjusted, but now we're adjusted now. I can't go back. Yeah, I think once you start
[00:45:14] That's like sort of although one time I you know it's fun. So well. I actually tried and it was too much I
[00:45:19] Uh in Baltimore had an iMac
[00:45:22] And I put I put like four different pornos up in one
[00:45:27] It was like way too much
[00:45:29] Like the the you know the cock can only focus on so much. It's true the cock brain the cock brain
[00:45:36] Um, nake is vaul soul. So he's not part of this conversation. Yeah, I'm punishing myself from getting fat by not jacking off
[00:45:47] 3% body fat again
[00:45:50] Um, yeah, dude. That's how that's how I'm sure that's how I'm gonna lose weight good jizz first
[00:45:56] I'm gonna drain my heavy ass balls by beating off constantly
[00:45:59] And that should that should be like seven pounds
[00:46:01] Yeah, imagine having seven pound balls. I don't have to imagine that's how much my balls away. No sucks. I'm sorry
[00:46:08] No, it's good. Stop thinks is fucking the fat
[00:46:12] Now it's my balls. It actually doesn't have gentle
[00:46:15] Um, buddy. He's like a kendo and then there's a there's a inflated stretch more there is a
[00:46:23] There's a fun. It was helping it balls. Uh, I got sorry, Nick. I'm about to betray your trust
[00:46:29] But Nick was a squatting
[00:46:39] So nigs like talking to me. I'm like wait. Did you piss your pants?
[00:46:43] And then because in the front of his pants were just like covered in water
[00:46:48] He's like no, I didn't piss my pants like what the fuck we had to like work backwards
[00:46:52] It was a giant piston on my crotch and it's like I didn't spill anything
[00:46:55] I checked the height of the sink. It's not like the the sink top been wet or something
[00:46:59] Did you boyfriend piss on your dick? No, because it was because
[00:47:03] He was squatting. I was taking drywall screws out of the bottom of those like metal studs
[00:47:09] And I was squatting and my stomach was hanging onto my crotch
[00:47:16] You're under good
[00:47:19] Sweat on his dick
[00:47:21] That's the the middle of my stomach when I squat. Oh, yes
[00:47:25] On his because the thing is I have way more hip mobility than the both of you because I'm because you are
[00:47:31] Untruth
[00:47:33] I can kick higher than you you can't do anything my hips actually you know my hips are physical therapy from fucking rolling and tacos
[00:47:41] First of all bitch. It's from a football injury because I am an athlete trying to open hope
[00:47:45] It was from it's from getting a sack on morgan states field in
[00:47:49] 2007 white castle
[00:47:53] Take it back
[00:47:56] Crave case but only using it for important business
[00:48:07] That is so awesome
[00:48:09] To get this license for Andre steak
[00:48:17] I'm Andrei cousins
[00:48:19] CEO slash entrepreneur
[00:48:21] Andrei wait, what's the new name of Andrei steakhouse? You said you said it when we were on the car
[00:48:26] It was so good the new name. Yeah. Yeah. It was just oh fuck. I forgot to oh
[00:48:33] Scenario
[00:48:35] Yeah, yeah intelligent Don
[00:48:41] For the upscale casual
[00:48:45] Yeah
[00:48:49] Yeah, it's good day one blaze dude
[00:48:51] They bring like they have they have their own blooming onion
[00:48:54] But they cut the onion in a way that it looks like someone tenting their thing
[00:48:58] Oh, yeah, hell yeah, that would be good. God. This is honestly such a fleshed out idea. Yeah, you've thought of everything dude
[00:49:12] We got to do Andrei steakhouse
[00:49:14] Yeah, I'm Andrei cousins
[00:49:18] Found a CEO and entrepreneur of Andrei steakhouse
[00:49:21] Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Bring an intelligent design intelligent intelligently designed in
[00:49:28] Tilly the design ambrosia for your tongue
[00:49:34] You know the desserts are called ambrosia and dandres steakhouse
[00:49:38] Entice
[00:49:41] Situations
[00:49:44] Let me get a steak situation
[00:49:46] A
[00:49:49] Porterhouse situation damn I want to steak now, but I'm trying not to try be a good boy. I've relapsed hard man
[00:49:55] I haven't been a paleo warrior. Although today was a good day. I drank a big fat. So I went I hit the gym
[00:50:01] You know I'm saying well we hit the gym of of
[00:50:05] Contracting I did some damn fucking lat pull-downs because that's good for
[00:50:09] Shoulder that's been injured in real sports. I got a couple people DMing me about my shoulder
[00:50:14] Well, I have a torn labrum if anybody knows what to do for that. I get DMS every time you get like shoulders are complex
[00:50:21] You got a DM every time I say every time you tell me something about working out I get DMS
[00:50:26] It's like Nick is not true. It's not true. What you're telling? Oh shit
[00:50:29] You hear that things they know what they're talking about whenever like when I said that my back hurt from from doing squats
[00:50:35] And you said no, that's just your muscles like that's just the lactic acid
[00:50:39] You know your muscles like getting stronger the thing is if you have like a disk injury
[00:50:44] No, no wasn't yeah, no, no, no, I didn't say I didn't slip it this
[00:50:48] It's not it's not your spine. It's probably your rectors are fucking whatever
[00:50:52] Or if you're squatting and you're not used to exercising you're taxing your lower back more than your legs
[00:50:57] Well, if you're on r slash bodybuilding call into the show and let us know what we're getting wrong. I will be happy to arc
[00:51:06] Oh my god
[00:51:09] You just invited a correction
[00:51:12] The most annoying DMS of all time
[00:51:16] Seeking that bodybuilding readiness with the with the DM corrections constant. I know you love it. Yeah, it's the same reason you love fucking
[00:51:25] Service you claim to hate it
[00:51:26] But there's there's a fire in you that I've only seen when you're arguing with Verizon or UPS
[00:51:31] You give those fucking jobs back to the Indians
[00:51:34] Not answering funds
[00:51:36] Anytime I fucking I call a customer service line and you fucking it's you know, uh, hello. This is Tracy
[00:51:45] Fucking piece of shit. I'm just thinking about you the bumper stickers on a shitty car
[00:51:51] Fucking stupid family
[00:51:53] It's not when it's like hello. My name is computer printar
[00:51:58] You're a mac and dodge. I'm like
[00:52:01] Printer let me tell
[00:52:03] I've had enough to hear with these fucking white people people people people
[00:52:09] National call center
[00:52:11] I I gotta say numbers to get you AT&T had a not the sweetest old black woman of all time
[00:52:18] She hemmed me right up dude. She fucking took care of your cell phone. She took care of the old data plan
[00:52:23] She fucked up. What were they telling you is wrong with the back?
[00:52:26] They said that when I said my back hurt from doing dead lifts and you said no, that's fine
[00:52:32] That's just your muscles recovering. They said you're wrong
[00:52:36] Well, they don't have enough information hurt from it could be said that if I
[00:52:40] Hurt my bet. I shouldn't be deadlifting and having my back hurt the next day like that really
[00:52:46] I thought it wasn't supposed to stretch out your lower back
[00:52:48] It does it works your lower back my works your whole posture your chain to deadlift
[00:52:52] There's no way that because you were deadlifting what 95 pounds. I was they lifting my body weight
[00:52:57] Like so 95 pounds. You're not you're gonna slip a disc with that fucking weight. You're right
[00:53:04] You have enough
[00:53:06] Sorry, you're right. Damn you beat him into submission instantly
[00:53:10] You had so much you were so happy to tell him he was wrong and then you have nothing to go back with
[00:53:14] I just said that people are saying this is a trump tactic people are saying everyone's saying it people are saying
[00:53:19] That is a good tag. I gotta give him that one. That is a good that is great. Both sides did wrong stuff
[00:53:23] That's right people who DMG did wrong stuff. I even may have said something not so good
[00:53:30] But hey, it's okay when I make a mistake because I do it in a different way
[00:53:35] We were talking today about how he does that lean with his shoulder. He does that gay way
[00:53:39] He pushes one shoulder into his chin
[00:53:44] But he always inhales when he does yes
[00:53:48] You know, it's like we're which is like the he's pounding too
[00:53:52] He looks like he's trying to lead alpichino in the room to have sex
[00:53:59] Silk road
[00:54:02] Digit like in fucking Carlito's way get into the apartment if you can
[00:54:07] Gail
[00:54:09] I want you so bad
[00:54:13] Why well you guys know my theory about his neck does look like a pussy being a repressed homosexual
[00:54:19] Look at like a pussy. You're naked. Look like a pussy. It's like I think it's taking a fucking thing
[00:54:23] I think it's a month of pussy anyway
[00:54:26] Somebody recommended to me for my shoulder. My shoulder always fucking hurts. Yes, but then again shoulders are complex as many things. Yes
[00:54:34] Doing uh
[00:54:35] Supine grip high rep barbell runs. Okay rather than latte pull down. What's a supine grip is when your hand is super
[00:54:43] Super nay. Oh like underhand
[00:54:46] Okay
[00:54:47] lat so wait
[00:54:48] Overhand ball rose you have the ball bar really yeah, yeah
[00:54:52] Oh, I could see that I'll work your lat. Yeah rose rose and latte lat pull downs is what the PT guy told me to do
[00:54:59] Yeah
[00:55:00] With that I and this is this is bullshit
[00:55:02] And this is just me guessing but I would imagine the road would be better for you and lat pull down because there's less scapula
[00:55:09] Perhaps I don't know but uh it doesn't hurt when I do lat pull downs. I think it's a specific tear I have
[00:55:13] Yeah, it's it's just overhead shit free weights. Let's put it this way. I hope it gets worse for you
[00:55:18] That's why would you say that that's very rude and I'm your friend you should go for the best for me
[00:55:23] No, I think you deserve to have a why a disease
[00:55:27] Why well we'll prevent the burgers from reaching your mouth. I can I can eat a left burger my left hand no fucking problem
[00:55:33] You're a john McCain shoulders
[00:55:35] You have to drink everything through a crazy. Uh yeah, then I'm drinking milkshakes you fucking idiot in every for every meal
[00:55:41] Yeah, fucking drink more of those green smoothies. That's true. I'm back in today. I had a nice one
[00:55:46] I'm sure you just make custard in that bite. I love custard for real. I can't even front I fucking
[00:55:54] I had yours my eggs. It's eggs and cream and sugar. Um, it's delicious
[00:56:00] Um, uh, what the fuck would I say? Oh, here's a smoothie ahead today very healthy
[00:56:04] Uh kale spinach red red swiss chard a green apple with red swiss chard
[00:56:10] That's what the reds the red stem just got different nutrients according to some doctor from my watch the youtube video about
[00:56:16] Uh, fucking a little avocado carrot a tomato
[00:56:21] Okay, and some coconut milk. I want to learn how to make v8 at home
[00:56:26] Is it aren't the ingredients on the label? Yeah, but there's a is it it says in other spices and shit. Ah, you need to
[00:56:33] You can figure it out brother. Yeah, I believe in you
[00:56:36] You v8 sucks my dick though as a juice
[00:56:41] I pretend i'm drinking a cocktail. I'm having a bloody merry then i'm back back drinking again
[00:56:46] Put a put a celery stock in there. You know what the v8 is nothing but salt, but you can drink it and you're like, yeah, it's healthy
[00:56:52] This is veggies
[00:56:54] To get through the pearly gates for drinking this delicious vitamin drink. This shit's not good the v8 sweet
[00:57:01] Splash the v8 splash. That's like all sugar. That's all my pussy does when I drink it
[00:57:05] It's all because it's delicious. Yeah, that one was like v8 was like look
[00:57:10] Only old people drink this right. How do we get kids to drink?
[00:57:14] Vegetables oh we just take the vegetables out of it. Yeah, yeah
[00:57:18] Cooling
[00:57:21] Sunny D with a little bit of spinach in it or something it fucking brought some ed some a deck
[00:57:27] Okay. Yes some ed some ed some ed some ed some ed some ed some ed some ed some ed some ed some ed
[00:57:33] Hey, hey, baby. Hey, baby. I'm some of the summer D suck my D
[00:57:40] Summer D is a good is a good old black guy's nickname
[00:57:44] Summer D. I'm summer D. He hibernates. He's only around for the summer
[00:57:49] Oh, that's cool. You know, I'm kind of working on him, but yeah
[00:57:53] All right. Well, let's workshop that and bring it back. He's got silk shirts with but they're the fake Burberry print
[00:57:58] So let's get to stops
[00:57:59] Grease trip let's stop with present toilet seats at Andre's day
[00:58:05] Hell yeah, you just dry your hands on a pair of fuzzy dice that one. That's that's too old. That's like fuzzy dice
[00:58:11] Fuzzy dice is like a hot rod guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No hot rod guys are also into those like hot rod white guys
[00:58:18] Yeah, so what presents are you getting us in grease? I already actually do have a couple ideas
[00:58:24] But i'm not gonna tell you
[00:58:26] Like surprises you know, we don't we don't have to talk about right now, dude
[00:58:29] I guys still got a thing. I got time before I leave
[00:58:31] I got my friend a good present for his birthday. It's a life straw
[00:58:35] So like it's like this straw you could drink like literally puddles on the street
[00:58:39] It's not like many cleaners. I'll turn the nose. What? Yeah. Yeah. What the fuck really? Yeah, it's sick, right?
[00:58:44] What if you put a good gift wait really? It would actually clean it. Yeah max literally cleaned his hands today on a puddle on the street
[00:58:51] It's disgusting. Yeah, did he drink it? No, but if he had the life straw he could have done it
[00:58:57] You're telling me I could drink a puddle and it's clean. Yeah, I don't believe I don't believe that drink out of this
[00:59:03] You could drink out a toxic waste treatment. No a toilet. It's called the life straw, dude
[00:59:09] I mean, maybe if you're gonna die, but why the fuck would you drink that if you live in a city?
[00:59:12] Um, well, you know, how much did it cost?
[00:59:15] I think like 20 bucks 25 bucks. I don't believe that the wife straw and you can suck your wife's pussy juice. Yes
[00:59:23] Nice and it turns it into another younger woman. Oh, it makes it taste like it's fresh
[00:59:29] Five years
[00:59:31] Do you think old pussy juice tastes different? Oh, it tastes like like a fine wine age
[00:59:37] Lead in it led because of all the lead paint women born before 1984. Yeah, I
[00:59:45] Interesting I don't think it's an age thing. I think it's person to person. I've tasted a wide range of pussies
[00:59:51] And I think I think a person's pussy tastes probably stays relatively the same personally before I engage in sex
[00:59:58] I make a woman sign a consent agreement for them and then I secretly record the entire
[01:00:03] Counter and then I do a pH test on her vagina
[01:00:07] To make sure that it's the right consistency right about in this fact I got on irc
[01:00:12] How to have sex
[01:00:21] And if it's not the right pH you sewer, right?
[01:00:23] If everything checks out then I uh, you know, I attach the shop factor or vagina and run it for 45 minutes to make it tighter
[01:00:30] Mm-hmm. They stick it in come immediately
[01:00:35] Solids all over body
[01:00:39] That's a lot of uh legal sex according to the fact
[01:00:43] That's a pretty cool ASCII art
[01:00:46] Up close picture of a pussy made out of X's and apostrophes. Oh nice. Yeah. Oh is that what that that's what asked?
[01:00:53] That's what those are called ASCII
[01:00:55] ASCII art. You ever see that? Yeah. Yeah, it's all it's all it's images made out of yeah. Yeah
[01:01:00] Characters I remember the first time I saw that I was like nice
[01:01:04] I was like this is pretty cool ASCII art
[01:01:07] You know, this is the future
[01:01:09] What about asp or guys?
[01:01:11] What about ask fuck? I shout out to woodgears.ca. That's a mask. Yeah, that's your guy
[01:01:16] That's I love that dude. Matthias Wendell. Yeah max
[01:01:20] Uh, he was talking to max about him today. Yeah
[01:01:22] Matthias woodworker that Nick's an autistic man that then Nick was banned mark or something bunch of candidates video of him
[01:01:30] Get this his autism. He loves woodworking and one of the things he's made is an air raid sign. Yes. Wow
[01:01:36] That's that oh, we've talked about that guy. Yeah. Yeah
[01:01:40] You know you have to repeat yourself on on a podcast. That's true
[01:01:44] That's the way to keep it popular is you have one or two good bits early on and you just keep saying them over and over again
[01:01:50] And that's when people keep coming back. I go I don't want to hear anything new. Absolutely not
[01:01:56] Just play the hits. Yep. That's right. You know
[01:01:59] Who's that who's that? It's the police coming to a rest stop
[01:02:04] Robbing the entomens facts
[01:02:06] Wearing a cookie for I had no I had a coupon there was no limit on the coupon. Oh, you didn't want it. You didn't want to fucking uh, you know
[01:02:13] Um, I tried to honor it from target the other night. I got caught
[01:02:16] Really? Yeah, it was buying on one of those like lightning to headphone adapters
[01:02:22] You know that like ran my card and then the screen just went blank and the woman put it in the bag and just walked away
[01:02:29] So I walked away from the cash register
[01:02:32] And I got like five feet and she's like, sir
[01:02:34] It did not go through and you didn't get a receipt. I'm like, well, your fucking machine's broken and she walked away
[01:02:40] What the fuck yeah?
[01:02:41] Yeah, she gave you the bag
[01:02:42] The employee I was like, then you fucking do it then because I did it and the screen just went blank
[01:02:47] Well, you should do what I do and just put it up your ass and walk out. Yeah, wearing a gratchet marks mask
[01:02:52] Do you have any fucking other men's penises Adam stole
[01:02:57] Oh, yeah
[01:02:59] That's what I do. I go to the bathroom at target. Uh-huh
[01:03:01] And then I steal the man
[01:03:03] The other come in my ad has been kidnapping children by curbing fucking
[01:03:15] What the fuck is that noise
[01:03:17] Is that curvy
[01:03:19] Is that curvy from the video game curvy? I hear
[01:03:22] Curb was curving noise. Kirby was a ghost. No
[01:03:26] He's like a fellow pink guy. Yeah, I don't think there's really a story
[01:03:30] I mean, there's no story with any of those characters curvy especially. They're like curby's the most yeah
[01:03:35] Oh, they're doing because early on it was like you had like
[01:03:38] Nine pixels on the screen to work with so you're like, yeah, this was just a dot. There's a lot of video games like that. Mm-hmm
[01:03:45] The seven up dot. Oh, yeah, yeah, seven up
[01:03:49] What is that?
[01:03:50] The soda seven up you fucking idiot
[01:03:53] It was it was it was in a it was in a video game
[01:03:55] Yeah, well there was yeah, there was a seven up dot game. No, yeah, there was you get a ball in in Tundra
[01:04:02] Yeah, there was a seven up dot game really and you just make a dot. What do you do? I don't know you just own it
[01:04:08] Oh
[01:04:09] Mario got I loved that slice of pizza for pizza. I don't remember that. He's a talking slice. Oh, yeah, I remember that
[01:04:16] Man pizza hut. What about hamburger? I love her glove. That's weird. That's good. I like that. That's weird. I was into the him
[01:04:23] But I never had hamburger helper and I was mad. Yeah, my mother never did my mom and she said that's for non-Jews
[01:04:30] Really?
[01:04:31] Not often, but I remember my mom getting the beef stroganoff hamburger helper when I was a kid beef stroked me off like this is the fucking best
[01:04:41] We never had enough is like one of the most like comforting dishes you could eat
[01:04:46] It wants in my life. Oh, hi. Oh, bow tie noodles. I love bow tie. Oh beef stroganoff is amazing
[01:04:52] I want to make myself. I want some for dinner. I'm hungry. Fuck. I'm hungry beef stroked
[01:04:58] I gotta fry up some chicken and fry. No, you're gonna go to your county calories. Okay, okay
[01:05:04] Not like a deep fry. We gotta go to home depot, bro. Yeah, we gotta go to home depot
[01:05:08] We got work to do we gotta take out that other wall. I gotta bring the charger for my fucking
[01:05:12] Badmies off for your sozor. Yeah, so are and are gonna lock fingers hold hands the rest of this episode
[01:05:18] Pretty yeah, how does that make you feel like left out? What if we I hope I die sir
[01:05:24] Me too. I've been kind of stressed. I've been alright since I'm drinking coffee having that one cup of coffee. I feel great
[01:05:30] I've been just that one. Yeah, it's just I'm like performance answer for the podcast. I do on the show. I copy from with us
[01:05:38] Whoa, I've stolen the the do I it neither shin penny board shit. What's that? Do you ride a little escape boards now?
[01:05:45] I'm gonna get really
[01:05:47] You don't smoke big like Lewis. You don't you don't smile loud
[01:05:53] Who says smoke weed? Oh my god. He's constantly sweet that guy strikes me as like a not smoking weed guy
[01:06:00] Oh, my awesome during during a skank fest. I was like, how's it going? He's like great weed hot women
[01:06:09] What an eighth great answer
[01:06:11] We're adults before you know before you've ever kissed a woman or smoked weed. That's what you said
[01:06:18] We eat hot girls. Yeah, we we were
[01:06:21] Like the night the night we did that one night or in Detroit
[01:06:25] I was just like doing blow with a smith and then yeah, Lewis was hitting it too
[01:06:30] We did like the entire bag in like an hour. Hell. Yeah, up in like four hours later. Oh nice
[01:06:36] Hell. Yes, Lewis is just smoking weed and then one point. He was completely naked. Oh, yeah
[01:06:42] Yeah, it was a weird night. Why was he naked? I don't know to be funny
[01:06:46] Is he he's not served up. What's his cock look like? I don't know he's in shape now, but he was a massive yeah
[01:06:52] I remember that he was he looked fucking hard weird. Yeah, Lewis bounces around man. Yeah, it was back and forth
[01:06:58] He's up and down. I'm the same way he too. I guess that's why me and Lewis get along similar body types
[01:07:03] Yeah, nutrition styles. Yeah, both podcasters sure both Puerto Rican rattlesnakes
[01:07:09] Yeah, retired that title to be the clown prince of the all right. Yeah, I still mean I'm still Puerto Rican rattlesnakes
[01:07:14] I think my new name is uh
[01:07:17] I like blades a lot
[01:07:20] After bringing all my saws all blades maulin and nick referred to bringing his saws balls bringing his blades
[01:07:26] I remember on the on the group
[01:07:29] I'm gonna come over with my blades
[01:07:31] And I was like we have a saws all here. He's like then. I'm not coming. Yeah
[01:07:35] I think there's no reason for me to be there. You already have a saw but as we found out today two saws all two saws
[01:07:40] Yeah, all right, let's go let's go do some prop shit. All right. Good night folks