Cum Town | Regular | 09/21/2017
[00:00:00] Wow we just watched the big short and let me tell you I am ready to pretend I
[00:00:06] know everything about it about finance credit swaps or something it's a movie
[00:00:12] about my dicks called credits credit wife swap and it's where Adam tries to make
[00:00:17] money by letting people fuck his ass who's wife is why you're the wife
[00:00:24] guys swaps his wife for your ads yeah I trade Adam invented a financial
[00:00:31] people trade their wife to Adam to fuck Adam in the ass then Adam gets the
[00:00:36] wife the wife yeah Adam then the wife bar biz wrap on it and Fox and then yes the
[00:00:43] wife fucks him also and then they steal the money he got from selling her pussy
[00:00:48] well it's all part of my business plan to lose money oh yes bitch speaking of
[00:00:54] business plans so I reached out to Casper mattresses mm-hmm I know they
[00:00:59] sponsor a lot of New York podcasts and ask them to sponsor my in exchange for
[00:01:02] a mattress and they ignored my email so fuck that company that's the official
[00:01:08] stance of me I got a tough fuck fatal mattress fuck Casper which is uh all
[00:01:12] right you know they didn't give me a free mattress either what the fuck dude
[00:01:15] we should get a free mattress what is a hundred mattress companies I what I
[00:01:19] want now that I a hundred I didn't know least nice at least a hundred there's
[00:01:25] a hundred mattress you know what the fuck I'm talking about bitch what are you
[00:01:28] laughing there's a hundred fucking in a box I've said that there was 100 mattress
[00:01:33] companies he just means a lot if you never heard an estimation in your life
[00:01:38] before I think there's more you think there's more than a hundred listen I
[00:01:41] just watched the big short so I don't joke around about numbers yeah here's a
[00:01:46] number for you five five and three quarters yeah that's the inches they're
[00:01:53] gonna go in your ass soon yeah here's the number for you three fifths and
[00:01:57] that's what slaves recounted us during the three fifths compromise anyways so
[00:02:03] but I'm looking at Marriott Scott oh yeah you want to buy nice sheets huh wow
[00:02:08] no I mean Marriott has the whole bed and I figure if you're gonna spend $1400
[00:02:12] on oh that's for the bed one set of sheets no that's just the bedding the
[00:02:17] bedding is 1350 right if you go to shop mariata com on the Marriott bed wait
[00:02:22] Marriott has a store yeah dude what else they got there they got a little
[00:02:26] little bottle is probably robes probably those slippers they got fucking
[00:02:32] giz everywhere shit every hotel remote is definitely covered in GIS right hmm
[00:02:38] for sure here's my question why can't guys wear juicy track suits you know I
[00:02:44] would be all the fuck over that yeah why not they don't make my size I would
[00:02:49] just make velour of tracks hold on hold on which is better interspring mattress
[00:02:54] or a foam mattress spring I mean personal preference I it's personal
[00:02:59] preference I have a foam do I have a foam you have tough to needle right either
[00:03:03] tough to mean or cash bread I remember I threw one away because I thought I had
[00:03:06] bed bugs their foam okay yeah those are foam I mean those are like in it you
[00:03:11] get those online and they're like rolled up I feel like you fuck better on a
[00:03:15] spring mattress why I don't know I just feel like I have I don't know I feel
[00:03:20] like a spring mattress is kind of like a waste of space almost right if you
[00:03:26] slice it like a like a piece of cake there's a ton of air on the inside there
[00:03:30] yeah but oh here you go that spring that nice bounce so here's for the platinum
[00:03:34] stitch bed and bedding set from shop mariot calm choose the mattress type
[00:03:40] or go foam size we'll go queen mm-hmm I don't know you don't need a king
[00:03:45] item sexual you're gonna be your fucking orientation why dude King would be nice
[00:03:51] you're like a king in your big bedroom for a king I mean yeah we don't we
[00:03:55] don't have the space why they why's it called California King because it's a
[00:03:59] different shape it's it's bigger though right no it's a different shape it is
[00:04:05] regular longer it's longer but a regular King is four inches wider
[00:04:09] California King is narrower California King swaps four inches out of the
[00:04:15] width for length interesting but then there's also a Texas King which is
[00:04:20] extremely rare it's like three times the size of both oh that's real I thought
[00:04:24] you're gonna say it's like it executes retard or something no that's any that's
[00:04:29] any bed yeah they're caught up in there they can't get out no
[00:04:36] sleep if they get caught up in the bed upside down standing up standing up
[00:04:42] like yeah like vampires yeah they go out at night and they sunk handy out of
[00:04:49] vending machines I want to shock your candy
[00:05:19] I wanna see how specific three minutes in dude
[00:05:22] I wouldn't I wouldn't bank on it so thirty four hundred dollars you can get the whole thing
[00:05:25] I feel like a dummy for wasting my money on a tough to needle mattress
[00:05:28] Yeah, dude when I could have been living like a like a business like a guy traveling salesmen going around town
[00:05:35] You know, yeah, I'll stay at the Marriott
[00:05:39] I still stay in the Akana Lodge, but I got HIV with air one time
[00:05:43] I got taken care of but boy I tell you never again. No more kind of lodges. I didn't care of don't worry about it
[00:05:51] I don't have it anymore. I'm excited. You know, I mean, that's the thing about that's my right. You're a sharky is
[00:05:58] Mm-hmm. He was a an actor from the 80s, but he had he got HIV from sharing needles back when it was like gays only
[00:06:05] Oh damn pause keep your mitzoff HIV straight guys. Yep. This stuff is
[00:06:13] Ray shark got it and then his agent was like, all right. He is what we're gonna do
[00:06:18] We're not gonna tell anybody not even women that you sleep
[00:06:22] So he's just giving people a yeah, he was giving like all these when I hate God forbid he put on a fucking condom man
[00:06:29] So look, I mean I don't respect what he did. He like you know, that's horrible
[00:06:34] He really but the man is a murder is committed to raw doggy. Yeah
[00:06:39] He gave like he gave like one interview right before you never do it where they were like asking or like so you you're just giving people
[00:06:46] AIDS he's like well the diseases are funny things sometimes you have it sometimes you don't like no
[00:06:58] In denial until the day died that he you know, you just damn didn't see didn't have AIDS
[00:07:03] We're going around at 75 pounds, you know, Adam look at you might have AIDS, dude
[00:07:08] Why I mean you have the body because I don't weigh a lot. Have you ever had a veneerial?
[00:07:13] I don't think so crystal clean baby. No Adam got it from Sharon needles
[00:07:19] Sharing estrogen needles with the other fellas down at the clinic from Sharon needles
[00:07:25] He fucked Sharon needles the drag queen. Yeah. Thank you. That's a RuPaul's Drag Race reference. No, it's a great show
[00:07:37] Rolls drag race. Yeah, Lou Raul's drag race
[00:07:49] So, um, yeah, you're gonna get a little bedding, you know, I just bought a fucking I just bought a cold brew container
[00:07:57] That's that's pretty. Oh, yeah, we said we were gonna review that I haven't bought it yet
[00:08:01] But I just got off Amazon and it works great. So that's it. That's a tax doctor
[00:08:05] Needle sent me this free mug wait seriously. Yeah, it's pretty cool. Huh? Yeah, no, I just put 700 dollars put the sticker on
[00:08:15] Why did you trick us so Nicholas? I'm a trickster, dude. That's true. You're low key running. Yeah, we're entering my my moon face
[00:08:28] Love all the trickster gods and shit the Greek the little the little saders and shit
[00:08:33] Saders, yeah, he was a he was like a half half man half goat and he was horny shit
[00:08:39] He was a trickster. It was like a little goat guy was isn't that pan maybe it's pan
[00:08:48] Poons labyrinth and it's about a vagina that twists and turns yeah, huh?
[00:08:53] Interesting, you know, I've never seen pans labyrinth. So I think it's something about war some
[00:08:58] No, sorry, so yeah, it is during the specific rim and it's about eating out of
[00:09:05] Hawaiian girls asshole. Okay, that sounds pretty cool
[00:09:08] I would like that whether it was a movie or just a
[00:09:13] Did he yeah, he made Pacific Rim goes off forget that yeah, that movie rules about gay queer mode del Toro
[00:09:19] That's good. Yeah, we're about del homo. That's very good Ryan Ryan shut my roommate is a roast battling
[00:09:25] Adomel del Toro now Adam mama walla and I told him he should hit joke. He should use his call him Adam gay koala
[00:09:34] That is a good dude, Ryan's gonna win that rose battle
[00:09:38] Yeah, yeah, I call him Adam gay koala be like what are you second? You could lip this flavored dicks
[00:09:44] You fucking gay koala. That's a good roast bad roast jokes, dude, huh?
[00:09:49] You can only do self-deprecating humor. You're bad at roasting. I don't like yeah
[00:09:52] I'm not good at roasting. I mean I had a couple of K ones you're good at roasting. I'm okay at it
[00:09:59] And they're like stops that it stops like ladies. I love chocolate
[00:10:08] I don't like roasting cuz I'm not a mean guy. I'm an cute. I'm a nice boy, you know, you you you're good at roasting
[00:10:15] Like doing crowd work roasting. That's true
[00:10:18] Yeah, if it's if it's in the moment if it's if I'm you're pretty good at funny moms last week
[00:10:22] Yeah, that was in some drunk woman if you're out there holler at me. You're my wife. Yeah, honestly
[00:10:28] I thought you're you're gonna smash I already I did yeah, I fucked you six times
[00:10:33] So that's that's the classic six time fuck
[00:10:37] One fuck for every bullet the machine gun fuck dude
[00:10:43] Boys I never really gave you guys the rundown from Greece man, don't you guys want to know about my magic
[00:10:47] I tried to do it three times and we've gotten bored, so I don't know if okay. Well guess what bitch. I'm not saying anymore
[00:10:53] Well, that's that you know I had notes right tell us a story about George, you know, it's not about George shoes
[00:11:00] He never bought shoes, so you know and I haven't seen you open a beer with your gifts by the way Adam kept shoving that thing in his mouth
[00:11:12] Beer opener and he's sticking the dick. I don't know what you mean little dick shaped
[00:11:16] I think it was you said literal oh I think it was pretty average slash small average colors, too
[00:11:25] Like a seafoam green dick yeah like a phoenix rising from the ashes. Yeah like Ray Sharkey's phoenix dick
[00:11:33] Shouts out Ray Sharkey. He's the real ass dude of the week
[00:11:38] He's the real ass dude who's making those songs for a little I don't know man. Yeah, we need somebody to make a
[00:11:44] a song for a thing I say in the middle of the show
[00:11:52] Lewis is really good at mobilizing people to do work for him for not a lot of money
[00:11:57] Yeah, like graphic design work and like production work pays people
[00:12:01] Well, yeah, I feel like he has like a dead he's good
[00:12:05] Good about paying people, but he's not charitable. There's a difference between you know interesting
[00:12:11] I pay people and I'm charitable like I give you guys money for shit that I shouldn't like what advertising income
[00:12:17] Come on we get we should get advertising income. Yeah, well, I mean it's really not the split that it is
[00:12:26] Yeah, I want to do a read I get I get a cut all the money that Adam brings it well Adam doesn't touch any of the money
[00:12:31] Yeah, I don't street the money comes to me. Yeah
[00:12:42] Daddy needs his taste daddy. Don't call me that. Thanks for protecting me. Thank you. Papito. It's dangerous
[00:12:50] Did you watch the Pimp show yet which one them James Franco Pimp show? No, no, I'm not watching that
[00:12:56] Alright everyone keeps asking you. It's like shit. You the autistic doctor show. How watch it look like shit
[00:13:02] I don't know it looks weird. What do you mean weird? It doesn't look good? What the fuck do you want me to say?
[00:13:07] This period is like does period drama. It's cheesy, dude
[00:13:12] Recent what is it? What are those called? It's not period dramas, but like mad banner recent history period period
[00:13:20] I feel like that look they have worn that out and I have an affinity doesn't work anymore
[00:13:27] I have an affinity for anything that said in like shit, New York like 1970s like when it looked bad. Yeah, that's cool
[00:13:36] That's not cool. Let's not cooler. I think it was the American hustle was the movie that sort of
[00:13:47] It sucked because it's a movie about con artists and it's a movie that does everything again the con the mafia should
[00:13:52] Kill them at the end or whatever. I don't remember but I
[00:13:55] I remember had a big issue with it. They got off Scott free
[00:13:59] They would have gotten got now. What's good about American hustle is that it's a bunch of bad performances
[00:14:05] Yeah, it looks like shit and it's a gimmick, but that's like the kind of the whole point
[00:14:10] They're con men and the movie itself is a con. Yeah, listen. I don't want to I don't need the whole movie to be making a point
[00:14:16] You know, that's too much for me. That's what I'm doing myself
[00:14:20] Well, it's going on the biggest the biggest play in the movie isn't like, you know the heist with the sheik or whatever
[00:14:26] It's it's when you get to the end of the movie and you let a bunch of critics tell you that Jennifer Lawrence is a good act
[00:14:32] She did have the ultimate rube as you the viewer
[00:14:37] You know and the critics that fell for it and said that movie was good
[00:14:40] She did it's not good if you're a critic and you think it's good. You're an idiot. You're a fucking moron for sure
[00:14:48] In that movie although I got pissed off bouncing I got pissed off when I read
[00:14:53] Dancing and singing and they like improv to Klaus cleaning scene is one of the most embarrassing things I've ever seen
[00:14:59] Just being an actor is pretty embarrassing. It's pretty embarrassing, but they're like, yeah, she totally improved out
[00:15:04] I'm like, yeah, it's not surprising. It's a fucking jarring. Yeah, we improv this podcast
[00:15:10] Yeah, so we're acting it look like she was acting like a fucking asshole
[00:15:15] And you just let her go you know, yeah, she really is too famous
[00:15:21] I just I don't like her cuz uh, this is a pretty misogynistic reason
[00:15:26] But after the fappening leak her like official statement
[00:15:30] What you're you're against that she didn't want people to see your fucking titties against her will yeah
[00:15:36] She's an actress. That's rude dude. She sells her titties all the time. No, but on her terms
[00:15:43] It's not the biggest deal in the world. I'm that's all I'm saying. All right, leak a picture your cock
[00:15:47] We're talking we could picture your cock right now
[00:15:51] To do that. I'm not sure she got treated unfairly because passengers which have defended on the show before you have she was
[00:15:58] Bitching about not getting paid as much as men. So she got like 20 million or some fucking outrageous number for that movie like
[00:16:04] Seven million more than Chris Pratt. Oh damn and then everyone was like this is the worst movie that
[00:16:12] The guy we talked about that we talked about it off Mike maybe but the guy that did the fappening got like 15 years
[00:16:19] Yeah in jail. It's fucked up insane. That is so long to go to jail. Yeah, you can't jerk off in jail
[00:16:27] You'll beat the shit out. You shouldn't steal people's fucking titties and pussies and put them on display for you
[00:16:33] And 15 years is cuz you got 15 you're violating Apple Apple's security protocol. Really? Yeah, that's why I got it
[00:16:41] At another point I already made the atom, but now he's gonna just talk over
[00:16:47] Stated as his own it. All right. Sorry. I won't talk again. I'm sorry. Thank you can talk just don't
[00:16:53] Repeat something that I told you well. That's why obviously why you got punished. Oh, so you invented that?
[00:16:58] Yes, I do the first person to say that the first person to say that no, it's just a fact
[00:17:06] Is it some may say tidbit we're entering Adams fact corner
[00:17:20] Sorry big y'all died about the cat going through the garbage. Yeah, Phyllis is eating your ham garbage Phyllis is a bum
[00:17:28] Ham, there's ham juice. I ate all my fucking ham. Is there any more ham? I'm hungry. No dude
[00:17:34] I had it all I get I get I get the organic
[00:17:42] Big dick soldier my breakfast is your fucking organic ham
[00:17:47] That's only shit. They sell the store. Yeah, really. Yeah, the bo-degas here is this like cross-section of like the lowest
[00:18:00] $9. Yeah, dude, and it's dusty for some reason on the packaging. Yeah
[00:18:05] Yeah, what the fuck yeah, this fucking soldier. I just bought his like covered in dust Adam loves eating dust
[00:18:18] You're a fuck up bug you're a lady bug with a fucked up face up front and not enough spots
[00:18:37] Guy lady bugs. Yeah, you are sucked it. You're a girl. That's what you are. They probably all have gender dysphoria
[00:18:45] That's my new Jerry Seinfeld observational bit about ladybugs. Mmm. Sorry. I try to work that into the show this week
[00:18:51] Is that a real bit? Yeah, I'm with trans people
[00:19:08] You dick off that's crazy. What's the name? Pardo Don Pardo Don Pardo. Yeah
[00:19:23] Don't know why you can't cut it off, but you can't
[00:19:31] Nice. Yeah, that's nice try. That's a good. No, I thought that I did
[00:19:34] I think my impression was actually better than yours. I'm not doing most you do most you do most
[00:19:40] He's doing sign for oh, I thought on Don Pardo. No you said that's how you hold on though
[00:19:47] This started by you making fun of him by saying it sounds more like Don Pardo now you're claiming you thought
[00:20:00] Sounds like him at all I thought that's on their own Hammond is now the fucking announcer because part of kick the fucking
[00:20:07] There's a guy who's got ham in his name. That's true. Daryl Hammond apparently his life is like real issues
[00:20:14] Mark Hamill Mark Hamill Hamilton Alonzo hamburger Jones no
[00:20:20] No, what hamburger now because that's that's actual word ham. It doesn't make sense. Come on. What do you mean?
[00:20:26] Come on man. You know why doesn't work you know you understand why it doesn't work
[00:20:35] That's his fucking nickname if I was named
[00:20:40] Okay, sorry, I didn't know that Christian because you're saying fucking stage names probably from a
[00:20:45] Robbie some some guy named Hammurab the guy Hammurab is code that's on actor who said it has to be actors
[00:20:51] That's what we were doing this keep up Adam. All right me and Nick are doing a great bit
[00:20:59] Okay, and you're dragging us down brother
[00:21:03] The show dude, I'm we're not even being mean to you anymore right we stopped that you and you're actively trying to derail the show
[00:21:31] We're just holding a mic up to its mouth and that's what you that's what you guys are hearing talk right now. I'm not a bug
[00:21:36] I'm the tallest come boy. I tower over you both you don't tower over shit
[00:21:41] That's why the anger the power over the Napoleonic anger that I get from you guys whatever dude from down in your down
[00:21:48] And I will I'm up here in the troposphere
[00:21:51] Me and Kareem Abdul Jabbar and you're short and ugly. I'm not short and ugly. Yeah, you are
[00:21:57] I'm tall and handsome. Nope and I get more attractive every year and every year you get you
[00:22:03] Badger and I get he actually hasn't gotten fatter and baller. He's been the same ball the same since I last three years
[00:22:10] Yeah, and he's gotten less fat. Thank you Nicholas. Well, I got fatter, but I've lost
[00:22:16] You're ugly. You've always been ugly. You always will be ugly. That's not true. You haven't known me my whole life
[00:22:21] I was way I've seen pictures you were fucked up. That was but ugly. I know and now I'm cute
[00:22:26] You're not you can't name things with ham in them. Yeah, I said a lonzo hamburger. Oh my god
[00:22:32] I don't know how many times we're gonna have to fucking this is fucked up, dude. You're ready
[00:22:41] Trying to have a fun game to kill time with and you fucking ruined it
[00:22:47] I mean, we were kind of running dry honestly. I went for Hammurabi. Yeah, I think that the getting mad at me thing
[00:23:08] So if people keep asking me to review the show with the autistic doctor
[00:23:14] That's a show. I'm not gonna do which shows that not does a show now where it's like that Toby from the West Wing is like
[00:23:20] Yes, he may be retarded, but he's the best doctor I've ever seen in my life
[00:23:24] And it's like, you know, he's doogie. How's everybody's yeah, you know, he's got a mind of a child. Yeah, doogie. How's her MR?
[00:23:35] MR stands for mental retardation and it's good in the medical community. Yeah
[00:23:42] Which is the name of the original doogie. How's her show? Yeah, you would think there would be an easier doogie. How's her pun doogie seems
[00:23:48] Like it rhymes with a lot of stuff, but it doesn't doogie boop sort of boogie Amtrak. How's her? No
[00:24:03] So the autistic doctor he only delivers babies and elevators
[00:24:11] That's a joke you could do about that show
[00:24:13] I'm gonna go ahead and repeat that to your friends, maybe what a network is it on? Let's talk, you know, it's probably is on like a major network
[00:24:20] Yeah, it's on like CBS or ABC. Oh autism is huge right now. Everybody wants to have a show
[00:24:25] We're not just a guy does something not autistic
[00:24:28] We remember when we were hanging out with those girls when we when we first moved here and that girl told us about that show
[00:24:34] She auditioned for oh, yeah, that dog that fucking dumb bitch
[00:24:48] That's her yeah, you know, yes come up with one in your head. I've got one to this one. Yeah, oh my god
[00:24:55] Actually, yeah, I'm just in town for our dash ends in this as this shows really cool
[00:24:59] It's like she there's it's about an autistic guy. They can talk to ghosts
[00:25:03] Oh, I thought it was an autistic girl. They could talk to ghosts and then solves crimes. I don't know dude
[00:25:11] She solves crut. I don't know. It's kind of like the worst thing ever and she's like yeah
[00:25:16] I think it's a power of being autistic. Yeah, I can go or they are the autistic ghosts. I
[00:25:22] Think it sounds like a pretty good show actually
[00:25:30] I was that just a coincidence it the her autism gave her some super natural what if Superman was retarded?
[00:25:36] Hmm. That's well. There is a retarded Superman is there's bizarre
[00:25:51] Literally a mentally retarded yeah, that's he wears like a pendant around his neck that says number one. Yep
[00:25:58] Yeah, the little other the little alien guy mr. Magazigazig
[00:26:04] So that was a good ass show that was Superman Superman show with Dean Kane no man
[00:26:11] Which that one was good to though. No, it's Terry Hatcher could
[00:26:15] Yeah, it's a Clark dab. Yeah, the Superman show that was like the same as the bat. Yeah. Yeah, I'm a serious
[00:26:21] Oh, that was really good man. They got a couple of them. The Batman animated series used to be super dark
[00:26:27] It was like he was like sad all the time. Bye Amber. Bye Amber. What are you doing? Have a good night?
[00:26:40] Yeah, I'm not really into Batman or Superman or any of that
[00:26:47] Which I don't call it that other people bad guys
[00:26:53] I've heard I in passing I've heard while I've ride in the train around I've I've heard
[00:26:57] Yeah, comic books be referred to as quote unquote gay shit, which you might find you've heard it in like in large hallways
[00:27:04] When the echo of you screaming the words gay shit and really I was doing the get kicked out of every New York library challenge
[00:27:13] Going from one library to the next calling the anime game
[00:27:18] Going into the anime section. So it's on record that I think anime is gay and every library in New York
[00:27:24] So no one can accuse me of secretly watching you
[00:27:28] Yeah, yeah, if you if someone finds some accidental anime on your last time somebody finds by a Netflix instant cue
[00:27:42] We're talking uh fuck Naruto. Yeah, the
[00:27:47] Come down huh Scarlett Johansson shout out. Yeah, oh yeah our fans
[00:27:55] I think I don't remember don't talk about it that way so
[00:27:59] Please do not talk about I don't remember did we
[00:28:02] No, we didn't know we didn't fuck Scarlett
[00:28:05] So we got mad at me because I just want Scarlett to know that I'm standing up for her right now this guy that had a
[00:28:12] poster of the notebook above his bed in his dorm a GW because he had a crush on Rachel McAdams
[00:28:18] But it's like that's not the fucking yeah, you pick dude. There's still don't have a poster in your room
[00:28:24] What do you like a fucking 14 year old girl?
[00:28:26] He's he wasn't a cool shit. People in college have posters like that tools. They have the bomb marley poster. They have the
[00:28:35] The show said that they couldn't listen to the show anymore because that was their friend
[00:28:44] And I made fun of him and I think I mentioned his name guess what
[00:28:47] Good fucking riddance. Yeah, whoever's not listening suck these fucking low-hanging balls
[00:28:53] We have literally hundreds of Adam has some low-hangers
[00:28:56] You've seen him. I've seen your nuts. Oh when I've been over
[00:28:59] You know what's really sad about when I lost my phone my phone that got stolen in Baltimore
[00:29:03] I had a beautiful video of my ass. Yeah, and I wanted to edit together. Oh, you got to use iCloud baby
[00:29:12] I fucking happening my brand new Mac died bullshit months fucking logic board fail. You get a new one?
[00:29:19] No, I got to buy apple care because they just replaced the board and all this shit in there
[00:29:24] And uh, I mean I'm assuming it's gonna happen again because they make shit computers. No, they make good ones
[00:29:29] You're the only person I've ever heard my life have this problem. My literally my shit is last
[00:29:33] 2009 I've got tushiba. I got it for $700 and it's lasted years. It's slow as fuck. It's heavy
[00:29:40] It's like you can't take it anywhere. Yeah, it's like 20 pounds. Yeah, but I mean it like that computer will never die
[00:29:47] Yeah, I don't know I added every show on it really yeah, I tried editing when I was editing the audio for uh uh uh
[00:29:57] The the soundboard yeah the soundboard the fucking Mac died. Hmm, you know just crashing restarting
[00:30:05] That sucks. I want to buy one. I want to buy a man. I get a map. There's some professional app developer
[00:30:10] Yeah, well you got the regular imagine if Steve jobs are still alive
[00:30:15] I'd cause shoot him an email. I say Steve fellow innovator here. Yep
[00:30:20] I'm designing a soundboard app where my friend says things like billy Joel and whatever man this shit
[00:30:34] No idea. It was actually pretty cool. Dude. I pulled your audio from one episode and that was all one episode
[00:30:39] I was yeah, I brought it into logic and then if in logic you can uh strip silence and set like the thresholds and
[00:30:48] Like where how much of it cuts and then it it just uh
[00:30:52] It just separates the entire your like track for the show into individual words. Oh
[00:30:59] Yeah, or like individual statement. So that's fun
[00:31:01] Yeah, then I could just go through all of them and I don't have to listen all the fucking silence
[00:31:05] It was actually pretty easy to pull all that shit
[00:31:07] But yeah, I don't know what the fuck you were talking about or why you're saying father
[00:31:12] Because you said it multiple times really
[00:31:16] A cupcake and a candy book. I'm sure there's listener out there. That's like episode 52
[00:31:21] Minute 11 episode 4 fo b itchy hit scratchy's ribcage twice
[00:31:28] producing two completely different notes
[00:31:31] I mean, what are we supposed to believe this is some sort of
[00:31:40] Uh fuck man, I gotta take a piss you guys handle this without me. It's oh, I don't know if we can it's rolling
[00:31:46] It's pretty rolling right now. This is this is the regular episode regular episode
[00:31:51] Well, you know what i'm telling you fucking pieces of shit about grease whether you want to hear about it or not
[00:31:55] I've not because there's topics that we have to cover
[00:31:58] We get to make a list at the end. Hold on
[00:32:00] God damn it. What do we have to cover? Oh next precious list. I didn't make a list this time
[00:32:07] Oh, I thought you're gonna what the fuck topics do we have we have to cover
[00:32:12] Hurricane Maria earth play another hurricane in mexico city. Yeah, there's an earthquake in mexico city
[00:32:17] Oh, damn, you know that people are dead that bill really collapsing. I do not watch videos of mexico
[00:32:24] You know that I hope the tacos are okay. You know that I have me too
[00:32:27] Boom dongle bill. You care a dongle bill. That's what I had to say about the earthquake anyways
[00:32:37] Hell yeah room that chihuahua. Yeah, dude. Yeah
[00:32:42] Speak like a mexico to marry. I wonder if anyone's made the observation that all these natural disasters
[00:32:47] It's kind of like the world's ending because of donald trump
[00:32:51] Something it's like mother nature's pissed off or something fun
[00:32:54] Yeah, well mother nature's a woman and she doesn't like getting her pussy grab
[00:33:00] Yeah by those hey by those little hands what I like what I like what I like
[00:33:04] Think it's happening is that you know the world is imploding because people are criticizing
[00:33:09] The president that's right. The only person they don't have respect to the office from kimjungoon
[00:33:15] Yeah from a guy addicted to cheese. Yeah, is he?
[00:33:20] He's a kind of cheese emintal Swiss cheese. Yeah, dude
[00:33:25] Yeah, he's almost killed himself. He's killed himself. Oh
[00:33:31] Yes, stop you should be like, uh, I think no she'd be standing up a little bit more for your brother
[00:33:36] I could hang him jump. He's a hoop head. He loves basketball. Yeah, my man almost killed himself off cheese
[00:33:43] Yeah, I mean that's yeah, I love that. It's like if you ran a country dude if I ran a country
[00:33:47] I would definitely have died that's gotta be you'd be wearing those like a some does
[00:33:55] Explain that cheese thing. Yeah. Oh, yeah, you got to get him with the cheese
[00:33:59] Yeah, you think you got to fuck that assassin that wore the lll shirt
[00:34:03] Uh killed his cousin or whatever. Yeah, maybe that'd be cool. Yeah, that'd be all right
[00:34:08] The fuck assassins that video is insane. It is really well like the spray and the lll t-shirt
[00:34:17] So like james bonso borax and the dust it eats
[00:34:36] It smells nice but it gets in there in his feet
[00:34:47] You guys are saying in this bully a giant a giant plastic
[00:34:56] Fly sware. That's how paper you can't move
[00:35:02] Yeah, fucking chameleon fucking sticks tongue out
[00:35:10] You guys didn't even do the one about the light
[00:35:27] Did you know they made a movie about adam's life
[00:35:36] He's he's in that movie james and the giant peach but it's a different version where james fucks the bug
[00:35:41] In that peach yeah, no, yeah, thanks man
[00:36:15] Something really stupid a couple times ago. I don't know that I'm curious fuck Adam. He's a bug
[00:36:21] Yeah, I'm a bug get your fucking uh and 10 I off me bitch. Yeah. Yeah. He sent the chemicals out to the other men bugs
[00:36:40] Boy, I'm just gonna like do a tweet tomorrow about like like Trump or something. Yeah get a bunch of RTS
[00:36:57] I'm glad that's happening every time i'm tweez please
[00:37:10] I love being with the damn boys, man. Yeah, I mean it made a big fat fucking steak today, dude
[00:37:16] I saw that steak. I think you're exaggerating how big that steak was I cut it in half. Oh, how much did it weigh?
[00:37:23] I go always a pound at least it was a pound in a pound in like 1.2 or something like that. That's good
[00:37:28] It was a $20 steak third bone in huh a little bit of bone not a lot. No small bone ribeye ribeye ribeye
[00:37:39] Fucking season the shit if you're gonna season it you get whatever. No dude. You know ribeye is the baddy shit
[00:37:44] Do everybody is the best but I mean I you know I don't you can get away with a different later cuts
[00:37:49] I can't eat a pound of steak. I don't like fillet them. It doesn't fit my macros
[00:37:53] I can suck my fadik but fillet is like supposed to be the nicest one. No, that's bullshit
[00:37:58] That's the way man. You know people say fucking chicken breasts is the get that dry shit out of my nose
[00:38:02] You can make any chicken breast sucks my dick. This is my number one. Well thigh is better
[00:38:07] I agree. Let me put it this way chicken fucking sucks
[00:38:10] And I'm saying that is someone that eats chicken const. That's not true chicken thighs good
[00:38:15] I went to pop eyes the other day chicken is all five. Oh, thank you brother. Yeah, that's my that I love that piece
[00:38:22] Five piece. Yeah. Yeah me and me five thighs. I love it, bro. Pretty good. I love that. Um, it makes me happy
[00:38:29] Delicious. I mean it's fatty. That's what it's good. The fucking thing above the drumsticks are
[00:38:34] The same meat. It's the same dark meat. Yeah. Yeah, but I don't know a drumstick feels like a little too cute to me
[00:38:43] That day we had the no at today. We went to Amish market. Oh, what a beautiful day that was bring it up all the time
[00:38:51] It was one of the best days of one of the best fucking mornings of my life, dude
[00:38:55] I went to that Outback steakhouse with my friend for his 18th birthday right before he shipped out to the marines nice
[00:39:06] Then he was involved to read for a while and then he married some fat woman and now he has a bunch of kids
[00:39:10] And he's an airplane mechanic that doesn't that happen?
[00:39:12] They assign you a fat woman in the army. Yeah pretty much no you get home and you marry like the first girl to ever jack you off
[00:39:20] You know like we read discover all their love from eighth grade
[00:39:29] Behind the movie theater and now we're in love again. She's 400 pounds now
[00:39:34] But you know what I mean, I can't walk good anymore and I'm losing my fucking temper real easy
[00:39:44] We have a big family now and everything I'm sure he's a good dad. He seems like he would be yeah
[00:39:48] All those people are better people than us for sure. Yeah, I don't know I'm making fun of that guy
[00:39:52] I wish I could have that kind of stability. Yeah, absolutely
[00:40:01] You know a lot of people think because I'm a tech a tech billionaire that I just live this jet set in lifestyle
[00:40:06] But actually I have very little free time. Yeah, you know between the gym and buying supplements and
[00:40:13] You know fucking go home. Yeah, make a ham scramble. They're gonna ham scramble trying to figure out how to make my own sconce
[00:40:20] With the sconce sconce is like a recessed look how I like sighted adam was
[00:40:28] And it's not a recessed light. It's a light on the wall. It's not like a lamp
[00:40:31] It's just a lamp on the wall. It's a lamp on a wall
[00:40:36] It's not recessed. Okay, it can be recessed like adam's ass
[00:40:43] We should have it outside ass. Yeah, your ass cheeks are convex they're concave
[00:40:48] Like your chest how's that even you've seen my butt. It's just denting. Yes. It looks like it looks like an upside down booster seat
[00:40:58] So your ass looks like yeah, it'll let you get you got arrested for letting little kids sit inside looks like yeah, it looks like an egg carton
[00:41:06] There's some guy at the park trying to trick kids in the sitting on in his ass
[00:41:14] But your asshole is prolapsed. It's fucking ass cheeks look like the a tampered with snapple cap
[00:41:32] Yeah, that's how you know adam's not fresh anymore. Yes. He's asked he's used up. Yeah, well
[00:41:38] He's used up but you like a snapple cap you can still use that boy pussy a little bit
[00:41:44] I like a snapple cap is tidbits underneath
[00:41:49] Yeah, I was I was waiting for you to start to say it so I could intersect
[00:41:56] Fucking snatch that right out of your stupid bug mouth
[00:42:02] Snest it right out of your web bitch. Yeah. No, that's another way you die wrapped up in a web from a spider
[00:42:19] How dare you come in my house my house made out silk
[00:42:23] I eat legs I eat you too, baby. I ate my own husband
[00:42:39] A Korean spider, baby. That's our new character. I love it. People wanted to follow up to retarded man that owns a Valero
[00:42:54] Yeah, we got some good good shit, man. Yeah, I still have to piss
[00:42:56] Let me know when I'm allowed to eat you you can go piss whenever you want you want to cross the words no
[00:43:01] No, no, we need to we know that would be so as though we need to discuss the hot the hottest topic this week what happened
[00:43:09] So I don't know some politics bullshit probably oh Sean Spicer at the Emmys. How about that? Yeah, I mean fucking pieces of shit
[00:43:16] Fuck Sean's pleasure. It's like the whole resistance thing is retarded and it's like how the fuck is Alec ball?
[00:43:26] Is he Alec Baldwin Alec Baldwin no yeah, oh I think he said Adam Baldwin
[00:43:33] Huh animal mother is that another Baldwin? I don't know about Adam Baldwin from fucking Full Metal Jacket
[00:43:39] Oh, I don't I know Billy Baldwin. Yeah, Adam Baldwin. It's not one of the Baldwin brother Daniel Danny Baldwin is a conservative
[00:43:47] Yeah, there's one that doesn't fuck with it
[00:43:49] Yeah, I think Danny the fat old one. I'm glad that motherfucker didn't meet the Pope still owns brother is like that too
[00:43:57] He's like radical right wing still own is a conservative to is he yeah?
[00:44:01] Yeah, he just can't talk about it. Yeah, Frank does all the angry tweeting for a frank or a slide
[00:44:07] I want to rewatch rocky dude. I had a hanker in watch rocky the other hell yeah, I watch rocky that movies
[00:44:13] It's it's so much fun. Yeah, Lord. It's an underdog story. It's uh, he was
[00:44:24] Everyone says he sold his dog. Have you seen those viral videos about how Stallone like
[00:44:30] First he had to be in porn, which is hilarious soft core soft core when he was sleeping at the port authority bustage
[00:44:36] But I still think you see his cock do you I'm pretty sure you see his cock and it's pretty big
[00:44:40] Uh, but then he says he had to sell his dog
[00:44:45] To like make rent at the YMCA or whatever who's buying a dog exactly you but you just bought a dog at him
[00:44:52] I didn't buy a dog you paid $500 for no I didn't paid zero dollars. You paid zero
[00:44:58] Yeah, that's what your dog is your dog is worthless to you
[00:45:01] So you got the shittiest dog that you could get yeah, if I buy people feel bad
[00:45:07] 40 40 thousand dollar dog such a waste of money. No, it's a fucking pure bread
[00:45:16] I want your breads are bad dogs fucked first yet. Yes, but they're better than your dumbass dog
[00:45:23] Why because they're fucking royals because there's some like joseph mangella like
[00:45:29] Yeah, because someone beat them up beat off their dad and and put the
[00:45:32] And then spit the put spit the jizz in the mouth
[00:45:36] Mm-hmm. That's the immaculate conception by the way
[00:45:39] That's how it happened my friend tommy growing up used to tell the archangel sucked off god
[00:45:44] You just told me that allen arbison was
[00:45:50] My friend tommy growing up he'd be like yeah allen irons mom someone just on her pussy and then it got in it
[00:45:56] That's not immaculate conception. That's not at all immaculate. That's regular conception
[00:46:00] Fuckin idiot. It's non-penetive Adam Adam's coming from his stupid world a bug reproduction
[00:46:06] Where yeah, someone told me allen irons mom laid an egg
[00:46:10] And no one came and spread their jizz on it and then allen was born
[00:46:14] That's just I mean I didn't believe it asexually
[00:46:18] Ria's gay sex with himself comes at him. Yes. I produce gay sexually
[00:46:23] Yeah, I said it first no you didn't yeah, I said it before you I said it and I set up you didn't get the pun
[00:46:28] Yeah, I did the pun first. Yes. I did. No you didn't I did it but stop praying. Stop sucking up. He's not sucking
[00:46:34] I was sucking up. That's a such a fucking I'm not small
[00:46:54] A fucking Adam has Adam has a thousand arms and none of them can reach a small ass dick
[00:47:00] They're all just trying to reach the dick
[00:47:03] And it's curling up and it's not working
[00:47:07] A thousand arms zero push-ups. This is like that Kafka book the guy who sucked the book
[00:47:16] Oh, yeah, it doesn't turn into a beetle or whatever in that Kafka book. Yeah, it turns into a fly
[00:47:21] Fuckin it. He turns into Adam. Oh, I didn't know he turned into Adam. Thank you, Nick. God damn it
[00:47:27] What was the big topic we had to talk about some happen? I don't think there's a new Obamacare appeal. That's probably it
[00:47:34] Yeah, yeah, that's it. What did you fucking quote tweet about it?
[00:47:38] I quote tweeted like I can't even think I thousand RT
[00:47:47] So glad I'm out on Twitter and I can just do things like worry about buying the best mattress
[00:47:53] You didn't buy the best you didn't buy it. You made a hasty decision. That's why I said worrying about it
[00:47:58] You fucking idiot. Why don't you just listen to things and parse sentences and think critically for stop also made that mistake
[00:48:05] He also didn't understand it's a dumb guy who lives in the moment and has good. Thank you fine with that
[00:48:10] Carpe diem. Yeah, that's my shit. I have a good time tattooed on my bowls
[00:48:15] I'm my right balls carpe my left balls dm, baby
[00:48:18] Yeah, and your bitch sucks them all sucks in both Adam. That sounds fun. We think of that
[00:48:24] Sounds fun. Yeah, sounds like you're having a good time Adam lives on your balls like a mite
[00:48:30] Like yeah, honey. I shrunk. Oh no. Do I have fucking pew do I have lice dude? I have crabs is Adam and his family on my balls
[00:48:39] His whole family ripper ain't a shrunk Adam's whole family
[00:48:43] There's being bullied by that korean spider
[00:48:50] Don't touch my house you touch my house. I fear it. I fear it. I'll wrap you up
[00:49:02] So I spent some time in Greece with my cousin leonita finally you brought this up already. He never finished
[00:49:08] He he lives in a family and he he bar tens and makes no money yet
[00:49:13] But they went on the episode. We didn't air you dumb motherfucker. Oh
[00:49:17] And he fucks on he fucks in a tent. He's a grown man that fucks in a tent
[00:49:25] In the summer he doesn't rent a room. He rents a tent and he fucks tourists. What kind of tent we talking about like a camping tent
[00:49:36] It's hilarious. He's 32 years old and he fucks an attempt. Maybe you should start a podcast
[00:49:42] Dude, what would you dumb tourists? Yeah, dude imagine what who's doing that american is hugging these dumb Australian women?
[00:49:50] Yeah, yeah, australians they're like they're disgraced when they're on vacation
[00:49:54] I explained to him what snapchat was I was like yeah
[00:49:57] You take a picture and then it disappears and he was like he was like you should call me leonita snapchat because when I fuck I disappear
[00:50:04] Yeah, I that's fucked some girl from denmark one time. Oh nice. They accent and she's like yeah
[00:50:10] I have not that fucked all the it's just only a time fuck american
[00:50:16] I'm like wow and you're like, please don't make eye contact. Yeah, it's like
[00:50:20] I'm trying to come when you picked. Yeah
[00:50:25] A german yeah from germany. Oh, yeah, let's hear about adam's story. Sorry. I didn't realize it was adam's story time
[00:50:37] Adam what else happened? Yeah, what happened? What happened? I don't know. I thought I could joke about the holocaust or nazis or whatever
[00:50:43] I thought it was kind of neat. Go ahead. What was neat about it?
[00:50:47] I don't know. Please explain to us. Yeah, actually
[00:50:50] about it about having sex just as a european style of sex in what sense
[00:51:00] Goddamn it. What was the top? I'm like losing my mind. I've destroyed this entire episode by not being able to remember the one thing
[00:51:07] No, it's been fun that I wanted to fucking bring up
[00:51:10] Which is come on. I should have written it down
[00:51:16] Yeah, let's say how about this in dog beers. I've only had one
[00:51:19] And dog beers that's pretty good pretty good, huh?
[00:51:24] I remember there was a kid with Downs syndrome the way to my community college would wear a t-shirt
[00:51:30] Like a novelty t-shirt that said graduate spelled wrong and then he's frosted off. I've seen that one and yeah, and then
[00:51:37] That's a classic rear four times. Yeah, but somebody bought that for him and it's like
[00:51:47] That's like buying Adam one a shirt that says female body inspector. Yeah, because he's gay or bugs life sure
[00:51:57] Yeah official official promotional merchandise from ants the movie
[00:52:02] Identify with that ant sky than a bug. Of course. Yeah, that was the joke. He's bootleg
[00:52:07] I was waiting for you guys to make that
[00:52:09] Uh, no, you're waiting to go into your cocoon to come out as a gay or bug
[00:52:19] Guess what you think your butterfly you're a moth bitch. You're not even a sexy ass butterfly
[00:52:26] Fucking clothes. Yeah, girls clothes. Yeah
[00:52:33] So cool attracted to fucking light bulbs ass bitch
[00:52:39] You're not out there following you on nice flowers like a fucking cool ass butterfly
[00:52:50] What hanging out around a light bulb outside of a shack. Yeah, oh, yeah, and one of those outdoor bathrooms
[00:52:57] I'm just trying to take a shit. You're just on the wall trying to leave
[00:53:00] Why do they smell like that like like old people that's what mothballs are you mean? Why do you smell like? Yeah? Yeah, why do we smell?
[00:53:09] I don't know tell us why can like old people not deal with that. It's right. You're dust-based diet
[00:53:28] Fuck can't wait to think of other bugs you are later in the episode
[00:53:36] Oh man, this one's bad, but it's good. Yes, but it gives a fuck dude. I'm really happy. I wait till people stop listening. We can kill ourselves
[00:53:49] Oh fuck dude damn over a hundred people are dead now in mexico. Oh, yeah, one for a mattress company
[00:53:58] By night nearly 140 people have been killed across the country
[00:54:03] Including scores in the state of morrellos close to the epicenter of the quake and doulesons here in the capital
[00:54:12] But the figure was expected to climb especially because rescuers were so
[00:54:21] Frantically digging out people trapped beneath mounds of rubble
[00:54:27] My name is janice bitch channel seven news the earthquake hit shortly after one bm
[00:54:33] A hundred miles from pechico see it. It registered a preliminary magnitude chevin pointo wu know
[00:54:42] Causing heavy and prolonged shaking in the capito
[00:54:48] Capita a lea more than 40 buildings and other structurios in mexico
[00:54:54] Including at least those schools official said crushing cars and trapping some people inside
[00:55:00] Uh, no, kiro taco bell said emergency workers and ordinary citizens race to the side
[00:55:07] I always wish they would do that the voice the change thing the code switch thing with like tragic stories and not like yeah
[00:55:14] You know, there was a parade and that's why stealing health care
[00:55:26] I'm deep or whatever whatever. What was the one in maryland called?
[00:55:32] The parade was casa of maryland the casa immigrant uh outreach program. Oh, I don't fucking know
[00:55:40] Uh, you know as a white ethnic immigrant people kind of like don't even consider us immigrants
[00:55:52] Now I would love to be a blimp dude dude
[00:55:56] Dude they got I was reading every like go wherever the fuck you want once a year. I fucking
[00:56:02] Get really into the idea of bringing back zeplins
[00:56:05] It was the hindenberg that fucked it up forever. Right?
[00:56:08] But they didn't go there using hydrogen, right?
[00:56:10] You know they go like 80 miles per hour plane goes way faster
[00:56:13] Well, the the reason the hindenberg happened is because the united states was the only country that had helium as a lifting gas
[00:56:20] Because we had a bunch of fucking helium
[00:56:22] Caffrons or whatever nice so the rest of the world it was really expensive or at least in the rest of the world where they manufacture
[00:56:29] Zeppelin's and they would use hydrogen which was like extremely fucking dangerous flammables
[00:56:35] Yeah, so they could do them with helium now you could just make fucking helium
[00:56:40] Zeppelin's and they would be safe and fine like the good your blimp
[00:56:44] Yeah, all any of them any rigid airship or non-rigid airship, you know they use safer lifting gases
[00:56:49] But we could be traveling boys we could have a fucking Zeppelin for the show how much you think they would have said it's 1.4 million
[00:56:56] Dollars. That's nothing. That's nothing. We make that we make a full size a full size on ad Zeppelin
[00:57:03] Dude we go up there and get a little Wi-Fi going
[00:57:07] Oh, you know, yeah, how big is the little like place that you're not killing
[00:57:12] You're not allowed on the blimp. So don't know it's fine. I can fly anyway. No, you can't just like he's gonna be too hot
[00:57:18] Not up not past 10 12 feet fine. I'm like whatever. Sorry. Sorry. It's gonna be eaten by birds
[00:57:24] Yeah, dude. We're gonna have a fucking hawk around
[00:57:27] Yeah, you want to be you want to fucking tangle with him? Yeah, dude
[00:57:31] You'll end up the bird on you're gonna end up in his mama's beak
[00:57:35] We adam had to leave the show because you got eaten by a toucan
[00:57:41] It confused his spotless body for a baby cherry
[00:57:46] And he got eaten by toucan sam. He thought he was fruit. Yep, the cherry flavored fruit loop
[00:57:54] But it's actually Adam who's a ladybug and Phil recall initially is what we call them
[00:57:59] Talia Hernandez 28 was on the second floor of the building taking a tattoo class
[00:58:05] When the earthquake hit and tore down through the structure she said she rolled down the stairs as they were collapsing
[00:58:11] She managed to escape the building but broke her foot
[00:58:13] I can't believe I'm alive. She said weeping and in shock is oh, did you see that fucking bus crash in queen?
[00:58:21] Brutal dude. I was like man. That is wicked and then I find out
[00:58:26] Guess what my man the driver. He's chinese. Yeah, I know
[00:58:37] Oh, yeah, 60 miles per hour to fuck up off socket. Yeah, right, you know driving that fucking shitty
[00:58:44] Atlantic City bus. Yep. You imagine trying to go to Atlantic City and you die god damn
[00:58:57] You could could have gotten much worse at the land. Have you been to lake city? Never been to AC
[00:59:02] You tried to get me to go once like a year ago
[00:59:05] Sam uh, Sam Pichel was like going on a whim. I think or maybe it was Racine going Racine asked me the other day if I wanted to go
[00:59:13] Yeah, we're seeing I'd go with the scene. I'd go with the scene
[00:59:16] I mean I grew up around that shit. So it's not that I mean it's got the beach there. I guess I'm out of the video. Uh huh
[00:59:22] Yeah, no, I just can't go back. The beach would be nice. Dude. You can find nice god damn it. You're such a fucking idiot, dude
[00:59:28] Is it okay? Why why don't you just not kick the recorder off?
[00:59:32] It was an accident. Did it fuck it up? No, I don't know. We'll see maybe I'll fuck your ass if this if you fucked it up bitch
[00:59:42] I think we're fun. Yeah, the beach would be nice. Did you find nice little shell to crawl into?
[00:59:48] Be your house. That's a perfect thing to do. How's yourself? Congratulations. Just evolved, bitch
[00:59:56] It gets sold down at the boardwalk lobsters look like bugs. So you're also a lobster
[01:00:03] Yeah, they sort of look like bugs. They got an exoskeleton. They are literally a type of bug
[01:00:11] You're Sebastian from the little mermaid begayer. Yeah
[01:00:23] Oh, bitch, I mean I don't tell anyone just like my sharky. I mean
[01:00:41] Ariel bad bitch jasmine. Thank you. You to Ariel or jasmine Adam's favorite princess. Jasmine had a pussy
[01:00:49] That's true. I don't want to sleep with a lot a lot
[01:00:54] Identify with a lot now you're going to be dominated by that muslims that magical muslim
[01:01:01] I used to think it's Jewish when I was a kid because he had the little hat
[01:01:04] So I thought that oh wow. Yeah, I was wrong. You have to take everything for yourselves
[01:01:08] Well, you know when you're a kid you can't let any you can't let any culture have anything
[01:01:13] Whatever. I don't remember ever identifying with anything
[01:01:15] No, no just just uh, I saw an avocence itself
[01:01:21] I feel like I've been a bodied sort of yeah, I don't I used to you're like on ketamine all the time kind of yeah
[01:01:31] I'm gonna get if you ever taking ket before
[01:01:34] Ketamine yeah, British club people love it. Yeah. No one time. I was doing British club people also love gay sex
[01:01:41] That's true. Um, I know that actually cuz I figured that's what you're not you're spending time there
[01:01:47] If you've been in it British place actually British guys. Yeah, you yeah do some buggering
[01:01:53] You got buggered have a proper ballicking. You got bollocks. Yeah, I love a nice proper ball. Just get properly ballicked
[01:02:05] Uh, I want to fuck a right fit bird. Yeah, I want to bugger a right fit bird
[01:02:18] Snog a fat last is more like shut up. It's got it
[01:02:29] British women have huge tits. Oh, I want to suck some big meaty watch tits
[01:02:33] Where how do you conclude that statistically they have the largest cup size of any nation
[01:02:37] Britain I love it. I don't know that it does. Yep
[01:02:41] Look it up. I want to suck some British women have the big ass titties
[01:02:45] How does that make any sense? What do you mean? How does it make any sense because a it's a pretty different manufacturer?
[01:02:51] Uh, bras the largest bras are statistically shipped and sold mostly in
[01:02:57] I would say that your diet is shitting because we're fat. Yeah
[01:03:03] I understand you would say the wrong answer. Okay, so it would be wrong pull it up
[01:03:10] Pull up my day. It doesn't make sense to me. I've already pulled it up. I know this for a fact
[01:03:15] Yeah, dude. It's okay. Well, it doesn't make sense because what you flutter around closets eating bras all day long
[01:03:22] Yeah in your in your um experience when you've eaten bras in america versus england would have been bigger
[01:03:29] Adam Adams got to google it now because he's so upset about possibly being wrong about something that he's never
[01:03:37] You made a claim. I'm just trying to see if it's true or not and it doesn't say how do you say how do you how do you?
[01:03:43] So what's a nice slang for titties in british? Adam
[01:03:48] I want to suck suck suck our atoms atoms a tit a tit mouse. Mmm. I guess
[01:03:54] What the fuck was that damn thing? I wonder what yeah, are you are you doing a bit? I don't know
[01:03:59] No, there was like three or four things. That's why I didn't take notes because I was like oh yeah, these are big
[01:04:07] I guess I don't know not north korea who gives a shit. I don't really care about this earthquake
[01:04:12] I mean yeah, it sucks that people died, but yeah, that's bad
[01:04:15] You know, I mean there's been so many disasters recently. It's like
[01:04:20] Mm-hmm. You know, that's why they only have christmas once a year. Yep
[01:04:24] You know who doesn't get that right the Jews to do holidays every two weeks. Yeah, that's why
[01:04:30] Nobody cares about it in either hollers. You're wrong. What do you mean? Who's got the biggest titties?
[01:04:38] No, I looked it up. It was it was in an article that I read the britain ship samosas
[01:04:44] It doesn't make sense. It's an incredibly diverse country. You said it was america. So you went
[01:04:48] Do you just look at that? No, I said in the word britain. Yes, not the answer. Yes America on average has larger breasts than great britain. Yes
[01:04:58] Yes, it's still you said america had the most you did I said it would make the most sense that america would because there's so many fat people
[01:05:09] You're fucking wrong Nick. I'm not wrong. You're wrong. You're fucking snide
[01:05:13] Fucking look down at you fucking can you chill for a second man? You're being kind of hostile right now. I'm being a bug right now, aren't I?
[01:05:20] Yeah, you're being a bugger. Yeah, you're the only bug that buggers other bugs
[01:05:26] Why is ass fucking buggering? I don't get that buggery
[01:05:34] What why does it now we're all looking at our phones?
[01:05:38] Handle the fact that I stated something and so you have to go find some other study which is wrong by the way
[01:05:46] Commissioned to study him your pathetic you're going to have to spitefully get your phone out because you can't score a single point
[01:05:56] Oh, oh something to contest. It's not our fault. We're literally a thousand times larger than you
[01:06:01] Yeah, as humans versus a bug. Yeah, right when earlier tonight
[01:06:05] You thought that a movie with Paul Giamatti in it was a documentary. Yeah, you did say
[01:06:12] What was that movie called to make the fail?
[01:06:14] He said yeah, he thought it was a documentary because there was a book actors in it playing it was a book
[01:06:20] Yeah, that's never that never adapted into you know how Harry Potter is a documentary
[01:06:27] Jesus Christ Harry Potter wasn't about something that happened. Yes, it was
[01:06:31] So here are the countries with the biggest boobs ranked number one us number two, Canada according to who?
[01:06:38] Titties dot com. Yeah, here's another article Germany
[01:06:42] Damn, there's two you deal with the only the only answer is ladies of ever if you're listening ladies in every country
[01:06:48] Send me pictures of three us non-caucasian
[01:06:52] Four us Caucasian was one wow us non-caucasian three
[01:06:57] That way for Ireland titties. You know what it is. It's milk dude. We drink so much goddamn milk
[01:07:02] They put hormones in it and make girls have big titties in this country. Absolutely. That's my theory. I think you're right
[01:07:08] Five Poland six united kingdom seven Nick fucking wrong
[01:07:14] All right, man. Are you happy? I'm happy. Yeah, why you needed that. Yeah, I needed it
[01:07:18] All right. Well, I'll I have to now after the show go find the article that I read that said that because you want to go find
[01:07:42] I'm not wrong. I'm repeating a thing that I read that said Britain is the largest it's we were talking about titties dude
[01:07:49] And you guys had to fuck it up with facts
[01:07:51] I you know what I never wanted titties are a thing about joy and they're a thing about just you know speaking from the cock
[01:07:58] And the heart at the same time. Yeah, and we're over here doing math about titties
[01:08:06] I want to phone out and I'm shaking his head
[01:08:08] All I want to do is suck titties watch them bounce up and down while I have sex
[01:08:12] I'm trying to remember the goddamn thing and Nick is still working on that
[01:08:18] Figure out what the thing we got to talk about I this is the show's over. We're nice. Have we done an hour?
[01:08:24] Yep, damn. There's a thing. I was supposed to mail off tonight that I didn't do what wasn't I don't worry about it's work related
[01:08:31] Uh dude as as executive vice president of this company it has nothing to do with the company
[01:08:36] It has to do with my own personal career. So oh nice. Tell us it doesn't affect you guys. It affects me because you're my friend
[01:08:43] None of the money will go to you and all goes to charity
[01:08:46] You know a lot of people don't know this Nick donates 100% of every paycheck the charity
[01:08:51] I do donate a lot of my money to charity as a tax write-off. Yeah, I consider not stepping on Adam to be kidding
[01:09:01] And I spent all the money on you know, they're little lights. So yeah, I'm on the floor buying him little leaves
[01:09:06] Framed his family to eat. Yeah, right. Don't bring my family into us. We have him living in a what are you guys having for two later with some sticks in the air
[01:09:18] Are you guys gonna have like palm trees palm leaves for Thanksgiving?
[01:09:30] What's your favorite leaf? I don't know firm who should just we should just end this now
[01:09:36] The whole show really that'd be fun. All right. Good. Well, we have a show. Don't we yes on monday come on everybody
[01:09:43] Is it this monday coming up this upcoming monday the whatever the fuck 20 something is yeah
[01:09:48] The fourth monday. Yeah, we're just as the general principle. We're doing the second and fourth monday
[01:09:54] Of every book that show it was great last time. Thank you for everybody who came out
[01:09:58] Um, we're gonna find a witch to turn Adam into a man for the show
[01:10:02] Yeah, and then which and then after that she's going right back to his state as a part all way
[01:10:08] It doesn't which mean feminists now. Isn't that like a family?
[01:10:11] There are a lot of women who say they're witches, but they just have black mate blad. It's like a tumbler thing
[01:10:16] Like a goth girl. They all just means you like suck and yeah, you have crystals and shit. Yeah, you're like not particularly attractive and
[01:10:24] Yeah, you're rude. Absolutely. You're rude. It be states because you're a witch. Yeah
[01:10:30] Okay, yeah, just like the women in Salem that were persecuted. Yeah. Oh, yes
[01:10:35] You channel their spirit. They live through you. Yeah, and you're being a being a mean demand
[01:10:40] That's getting back for those women would have hated you. They were also Puritans. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
[01:10:46] Yeah, they were slightly cooler Puritans. That doesn't make them cool
[01:10:51] Yeah, you know what movie I tried to like but could the bogus bogus the witch. Yeah, hocus pocus
[01:10:58] The witch I actually really liked it just didn't do it. What's the witch?
[01:11:02] It was cool a horror movie from like a year ago. No, I never saw it was yeah
[01:11:07] There's a fucked up little you seem to be afraid of the movie can't see movies that he's afraid of I'm not afraid of any movie
[01:11:15] Yeah, I've never been afraid you're afraid of it's a movie. Why would you be afraid you're afraid of that one movie where it's like a lizard
[01:11:22] He kind of looks like under his Thompson
[01:11:24] Um, but it's you're afraid because it's a lizard and you're just gonna eat you
[01:11:30] Are you talking about fear and loathing and loss? No, but there was there was there was like a lizard version of it
[01:11:35] What there's this scene where he's tripping and sees the blizzers or something like that
[01:11:41] Yeah, that's where you're afraid of the Johnny Depp movie. I'll eat you Rango Rango. Yeah, I never saw that
[01:11:47] It looks bad because you're afraid of it. Yeah, I'm not afraid to get into the witch
[01:11:56] So I liked him in that wraps up. Oh, they got fucking blade runner coming out on 4k blue ray
[01:12:03] And they have a new blade runner in the theater 2069 looks sick. Yeah, you think it's gonna be good
[01:12:08] It looks like bad. I should watch it. Move your son. I haven't considered what makes something look good or look bad
[01:12:13] I mean just rebooting blade runner or whatever looks bad to me
[01:12:18] Sounds bad sounds bad. Oh, you know what that sounds bad. The other one looks bad. I wanted to like the other one
[01:12:24] I love David's should watch it. I might watch it, but I mean I don't know why I'm standing up for it. Maggie Jill. No, it's good
[01:12:30] Yeah, she's got very droopy 70s shit. Yeah, but it's good for the character. She's she's the one. She's weird
[01:12:38] Linda Lovelace. Yeah, she's not her. She just plays like a like rupee big old pair of droopy 70s toady
[01:12:45] You know what I'm talking about? I do. I do. I do the cities in the city's a hangover. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah
[01:12:50] And she plays like a mom. That's like I know what else you know
[01:12:53] You don't see a lot in like in early playboys. They had very
[01:12:56] Very conical titties. Yep, the nipples. They were fucking like we've talked about this before but apple learning and got father part two
[01:13:02] Yes, got part of part one. No, no, she had puffy nipples. That's a different puffy pony kind of but yours weren't that big
[01:13:11] Missiles missile titties. Yeah, I think that's from like early boob jobs. No, I think it's because the the bras bras. Yeah. Oh, that's right
[01:13:18] That makes sense. Well, I I just I wish we could
[01:13:22] Come up with different bra shapes to force women to wear so you can make them any shape
[01:13:26] We want it squares like play dough. Mm-hmm. If I have a wife
[01:13:31] I'm going to design custom bras in my woodworking shop
[01:13:39] breasts of all shapes. I think I like round I
[01:13:52] Buttons on a banana talking about like 35 nipples. Oh, you want buttons. Yeah, dude. Well, they do things
[01:14:01] I mean if I could figure out a way to wire up my wife
[01:14:05] You know it's a fucking wires in that body of hers into it through her pussy however
[01:14:10] We're talking about the perfect woman here. So six tits all remote shaped. They all hook up to my AV receiver
[01:14:20] Fucking body where we put in there instead. That's right folks a pussy
[01:14:27] Right on top of her head I played my remotes and I fucked the top of her head
[01:14:37] You dream replace the asshole another pussy put some nipples on those ass cheese. Oh, yes
[01:14:44] Sucking those ass titties feet cut them off replace them with more titties
[01:14:52] She's bouncing. Yeah, I don't know you're thinking but what about the companionship aspect if she doesn't have a brain
[01:14:59] Fuck that shit now. We're talking who needs companionship. I've got aggression
[01:15:05] You know, I'm angry about the world. You don't need friends. No, you just stay angry. We need some ass titties to fuck. That's cool
[01:15:13] It is cool, you know who needs who needs the companionship of a woman when I got my trusty CB radio
[01:15:20] The other guys out there on the road. They really knows what it means to do your own surgery
[01:15:29] That's right on your spouse. I would you fuck a real girl doll a real doll
[01:15:34] I mean, I guess but I wouldn't like if there's one in front of me and I was horny I guess
[01:15:39] I wouldn't buy one like as a flashlight you would like use it to yeah to come to come
[01:15:46] Yeah, I wouldn't take it out on the date. What if like when the technology gets better and it's like fucking a person still yes
[01:15:56] Yeah, you don't understand what you mean radicals work. Would you fuck a real doll? Yeah, yeah, but what if they were better?
[01:16:03] Yeah, this is like one of my hypotheticals. No what I'm saying is like as you like would you pursue that if no
[01:16:10] I would not buy one if there was like a some sort of Android type sex robot how much are how much they call it
[01:16:15] And it was the best how good does it feel you could just go like a prostitute?
[01:16:20] 50 bucks and have like the best robots. Yeah, probably every once in a while
[01:16:25] Just see just a robot to get your nut. Yeah, cuz my biggest problem with prostitution is I don't I don't want you feel bad
[01:16:31] You're hurting prisons feelings not them hurting the person you're making you ruining your day. Yeah
[01:16:38] I don't know. I'd be a bright spot dude. You know I get prostitutes. I give them back massages either pussy watch some
[01:16:49] Yeah, can you eat a prostitute's pussy? I feel like it would be strange. I feel like you have to pay more
[01:16:54] Because I do enjoy what you feel like you know this yeah, yeah, tell us from your personal experience
[01:17:01] I've never I've never eaten a prostitute's pussy before
[01:17:07] That's the sounds like somebody's a scaredy cat. I love that we had to make you say the sentence
[01:17:13] I've never eaten a prostitute's pussy before yeah, you put yourself in that situation
[01:17:20] Luckily it's a metaphorical one a literal web would kill you yeah
[01:17:27] Well, I guess we should end the show yeah, it's about time yep, yep