Cum Town | Regular | 09/28/2017
[00:00:05] uh... not that they don't sponsor the show this is one hundred percent of
[00:00:09] totally natural endorsement baby bell minis
[00:00:18] i was a little flavors intimidated by them as a kid because i know me too
[00:00:24] the reason for friends is the most retarded like that
[00:00:28] like those you know the wax always got to understand it
[00:00:31] it didn't make sense to me and i tried to eat what what happened was i was so
[00:00:36] you don't fucking eat the way i was a kid
[00:00:38] fuck yeah exactly you buy a so what it is a bit of a bought a button to the
[00:00:42] yet into the wax and my friends made fun of me yeah and i was like i got
[00:00:46] an effort to get a little it's a little as adults that in the city is supposed
[00:00:53] uh... well yeah now that i'm back on like you know
[00:01:02] many baby bell lights are the best snack lights
[00:01:05] yeah dude it's fifty calories who who's like six grams of protein and five
[00:01:11] yeah you want to be a paleo warrior gets a new baby bell lights
[00:01:15] you like nine of them and it's like you know
[00:01:18] dog i roasted another mother fucking damn pork shoulder
[00:01:23] that's the fucking food of the of the fall for me right or but it but are not
[00:01:27] yet and i'd dice that bitch up i've been making squash fries and squash
[00:01:31] do you know it's great you want to go paleo you want a nice low-carb alternative
[00:01:36] into spaghetti fucking spaghetti squash was with which doesn't need more than
[00:01:44] little garlic garlic oil and then if you feel that bitches and fucking pasta
[00:01:57] i mean i i i i i i i like that's why i can't go zero carb
[00:02:01] i can't wait to eat pasta now fuck pasta
[00:02:04] i'm a rice i'm a mother fucking right now come over from you come over the gym
[00:02:08] suffer through whatever fucking bullshit high protein meal you have to eat
[00:02:12] because i i don't know about you guys but when i go hard
[00:02:15] when i when i watch my mark wallberg two thousand sixteen workout video and
[00:02:21] remember my my i'm acting to the gym and i'm looking in
[00:02:25] from across the gym watch mark workout and i take myself and i'd
[00:02:29] use a green screen to edit myself in hanging out with mark yes
[00:02:33] all my work flow is i do one set of bench
[00:02:38] uh... motion apple motion yes green screening myself in the scenes with
[00:02:43] mark wallberg uh-huh and then i make myself three out of four of the brothers
[00:02:50] not dani anyways when i get done with that kind of work yeah yeah i fucking i have
[00:02:54] no appetite and no appetite after working out really good protein shake
[00:03:00] to have to make like a fucking you know half a pound of chicken and like
[00:03:06] so i think it's like my heart is so after working out are the fucking best
[00:03:12] i get i get more i get tired from eating like chicken breasts or steak after
[00:03:18] now then we're going to go eat whenever
[00:03:20] but then when i am able to just fucking load up on
[00:03:39] so really i really make fresh pasta if you notice battlefield one they updated
[00:03:44] the game there's an update and they took the black guy out of it i know it's a
[00:03:48] white guy but it's kind of a dsl sort of
[00:03:50] he does have the russian so they may have to make him look asiatic but look at his
[00:03:54] gun dude it's got it's for god oh for barrels yeah what kind of gun do you
[00:04:00] if you have a gun yes or legal big as well
[00:04:03] if you ever seen a desert eagle where you're there fucking it's ridiculous i've
[00:04:08] never seen in real life but yeah i'm like yeah well that's because you're
[00:04:11] a pussy yeah you you're you're one of those people that's like
[00:04:14] oh i would be afraid if i was even around the gun i want to shoot you've never
[00:04:18] snorted cocaine off a desert eagle dude
[00:04:21] then get the fuck you know we should go to a shooting formative liberal bullshit
[00:04:26] it's like i would be terrified if i was around a gun i don't even know how
[00:04:30] just it's like being around a fuck anything a small interest you fucking
[00:04:36] wouldn't want to be around a gun if you're gonna shoot a r dude
[00:04:40] yeah those are some of the shoots first of all shooting an ar-15 is not fun
[00:04:44] compare it if you go to it here's a tip if and this is a tip from
[00:04:47] an ignorant man that just likes to have fun so i know what i'm talking about if
[00:04:51] you're some gun fag out there that loves guns and you're like no absolutely
[00:04:55] not here's what you need to do an r slash guns yeah you
[00:04:58] already enjoy guns too much this is for the casual
[00:05:01] you don't know shit about guns you want to go to a shooting rage and have a good
[00:05:04] time because shooting rage is not fucking cheap
[00:05:07] you know with the gun rental and all the fucking bullets it like it can
[00:05:10] it racks up pretty fucking quick to be an expensive what if you be yob bring
[00:05:14] your own bullets uh it might save you a little bit
[00:05:16] money i mean i'm sure i'm sure i'm sure but you buy the bullets at the gun
[00:05:20] store which is usually like where the range is
[00:05:22] anyway yeah bullets are the expense i mean if you bring your own gun then
[00:05:26] maybe you can save a little bit of money but steal a gun yeah
[00:05:29] you can make your own bullets that's what i said that that thing
[00:05:32] isn't that in uh what it like fucking in borne doesn't the guy have that like
[00:05:37] he makes his own bullets there's a guy in one of those movies
[00:05:40] maybe it's maybe it's red dawn okay it's in a movie
[00:05:44] because the guy who makes his own bullets i want movie all i use is hollow tips
[00:05:48] bro yeah that's it from yeah fucking hurts my enemies more
[00:05:52] yeah i use hollow tips with uranium and then if it doesn't kill you you'll get
[00:05:56] cancer 20 years later that's that's pretty cool yeah
[00:05:59] uh what kind of weapons do you think the cia has don't they have like a gun that
[00:06:03] gives you a heart attack if you shoot it
[00:06:06] i i don't like a cia yeah dude the secret heart attack gun i've been talking to
[00:06:10] tim dillin a lot why would why would the cia need
[00:06:13] to kill like uh leaders guns already kill people yeah but this is the
[00:06:17] screen they don't need that dude the russians the russians
[00:06:21] fucking killed some like poison dirt yeah with uh they do that on radioactive tea
[00:06:27] i know pretty cool yeah anyhow so if you want to go to a gun range
[00:06:30] have a good time you get uh a 38 magnum or a 44 magnum if you can handle it
[00:06:37] 44 magnums is uh what i have on my nightstands yeah from having sex
[00:06:41] a point three eight inch penis is what you have
[00:06:46] magnum condoms the big kind no point three eight inch penis have you ever worn a
[00:06:50] magnum i yeah i can tell a difference yeah it's
[00:06:53] both it's all they just it falls off like a regular
[00:06:55] conference yeah yeah yeah it both just give it
[00:06:59] it's like a i think it's a marketing thing it totally whatever the difference is
[00:07:02] is negligible i like them because i like a baggy fit
[00:07:05] the way i wear my jeans i like my condoms you know a little extra room i love
[00:07:09] the sad yeah a little extra room yeah uh no but uh
[00:07:14] yeah you get a fucking magnum or any kind of revolver
[00:07:18] a handgun if you're gonna shoot like a semi-automatic you get it like a 45
[00:07:23] you know something fucking big can you play a
[00:07:25] millimeter bullshit anything smaller than nine millimeter bullshit no
[00:07:29] although you know what i want to do get a little fucking sat at a night special
[00:07:33] and just fucking practice grabbing it from my ankle and shooting an enemy
[00:07:37] yeah you know those are my favorite guns the little ass guns on your
[00:07:40] 38 snub nose what's the James Bond gun the PT
[00:07:44] cruiser PT cruiser yeah it's a good ass gun dude
[00:07:49] it's the kind i forget the name though the Walter P.P.K. the Walter P.P.K that's
[00:07:54] right P.P. Tiny little gay little British little
[00:07:59] yeah we're gonna take out of the shoot range and they just give them
[00:08:02] they'd take one look at them and they just give them a piece of paper to give
[00:08:05] himself paper cuts with it that's his weapon
[00:08:09] you just throw bullets they're like and it ends up behind him
[00:08:15] the wind that draft comes in like that's a really good
[00:08:21] impression that's the best impression of Adam
[00:08:27] like a wilting flower uh fuck yeah dude but that's how you have fun at the
[00:08:31] gun range you get the loudest fucking gun possible
[00:08:34] and they don't even worry about hitting the target you know
[00:08:37] because the real target is the other other guys at the gun range you show them
[00:08:41] up the other guy if you just pull that gun back
[00:08:44] place it to their head then you're the winner
[00:08:46] you win gun range how quick would you die if you did that at a gun range
[00:08:50] um immediately i don't know about me i know how quick they would die
[00:08:53] yeah instantly i could i guarantee you i could kill everyone in a gun range
[00:08:58] before they could take me down but you're surrounded by good guys with guns
[00:09:02] that was that i had a gun right remember that when you're a kid you have like
[00:09:05] those fantasies the only thing they can stop that's the only thing bad
[00:09:08] as a kid you saw like in your mind you knew how to disarm people yeah yeah
[00:09:12] you do karate shit i take the gun yeah like what i would do
[00:09:16] yeah and i would back flip yeah do one of those running wall back flips
[00:09:21] yeah yeah i would do it right there arm i would do one of those ray
[00:09:25] misterio like wrap my legs around their neck and like
[00:09:27] hurricane ronna hurricane ronna yeah adam would do the zenia on a top
[00:09:33] what's that one where for the bag the the
[00:09:35] bond the evil bond girl from gold nigh uh adam has sex with the men today
[00:09:42] squeezes the death he would do he would do the zina warrior princess
[00:09:46] adam likes to have sex missionary style oh yeah on the bottom
[00:09:50] do you guys remember there is a lesbian plaland on the show
[00:09:53] his leg around what show zina warrior princess oh that was my absolute
[00:09:57] shit lucy long lesbian with gabrielle yeah
[00:10:00] gabrielle was hot dude yeah gabrielle was like her like her like prison wife
[00:10:05] yeah i guess prison husband no no zina's the fuck zina
[00:10:08] that was no i've no i mean but in girl prison how do they
[00:10:13] oh i see what you mean it's not like they fucking make a girl either
[00:10:16] pussy and they go yeah you're a girl now is there already a girl
[00:10:20] oh yeah that's true yeah the one who gets their pussy
[00:10:23] i guess that they become a child is that the gender under woman
[00:10:29] now you're fine your name's tommy say it a bitch say it child bitch
[00:10:38] my name's tommy and i want i want to drink a juice
[00:10:44] that's what i like to hear because i want to drink a juice does my pussy taste
[00:10:48] good does my pussy taste like juice you better have a juice smile on your face
[00:10:52] from my juicy ass pussy tommy your five-year-old bitch
[00:10:57] yeah i think you're right nake all lesbians are actually want to be
[00:11:05] eaten out by little boys that's what that's their fantasy
[00:11:09] no i don't mean lesbians dude i'm talking about prison lesbians yeah
[00:11:12] which which and they don't identify as lesbians
[00:11:15] they're straight okay it's the it's the women that they're
[00:11:19] raping that are in june's room the five-year-olds
[00:11:22] yeah i said i'm not a petaphone no they're the petaphone absolutely
[00:11:29] doing good news i love little kid lisp man this shit is so funny
[00:11:35] it's like talk normal bitch you know what i mean boys
[00:11:39] yeah kids with speech impediments yeah it's like
[00:11:42] that's me slapping them there's a fat little boy on my block with a speech
[00:11:45] impediment hell yeah who i saw doing a full split
[00:11:49] and wrapping cardie b you told this story in the podcast i didn't tell it on the
[00:11:52] podcast i told you guys in pedaling but it was very funny that rules yeah
[00:11:56] a little fat kid doing splits there's nothing like a fat little gay kid a fat
[00:12:00] gay kid the best i hope my son is a fat gay kid
[00:12:04] yeah not like his father before you try it bitch
[00:12:17] yeah that's a that's a really good fact i was just gendering people at the
[00:12:20] show last year i was really rude man yeah i was
[00:12:22] hooked up yep you called the trans bartender he
[00:12:25] yeah no i didn't violated the number one rule that bar no bullshit
[00:12:30] they got assigned the show the bar we do the show out they have assigned the
[00:12:33] bathroom that says no racism no transphobia
[00:12:43] able to do some real fuck old people yeah
[00:12:45] it cares dude i mean i get yeah it's real i mean i can i can
[00:12:50] but my grandpa's like they once you get to a certain age it's like you know
[00:12:54] you're gonna die soon right and it's not like maybe i got five good years left
[00:12:58] it's like two and it's like yeah yeah i'm just gonna i'm like the next thing
[00:13:02] the next thing that's gonna happen is i'm going to die right the next big life
[00:13:05] not even like i wonder what the new james bond movie is going to be like
[00:13:09] it's like yeah i'm not going to see that
[00:13:12] there's not going to be anything the only thing that can possibly happen next
[00:13:17] is that i die damn and i'll never know another
[00:13:21] iPhone yeah right once you get to that point it's like
[00:13:26] they're just miserable and he's lived a good life you know i mean
[00:13:30] he has a big family that he lords over with his shitty opinions
[00:13:34] which is all he ever wanted you know was to impose his his
[00:13:40] patriarchal world yeah right have have an extended family of 20 people who he
[00:13:45] could yell at and it's like you know he just doesn't seem happy
[00:13:51] which is fucked up you know my other grandma was like that she died
[00:13:54] but my grandpa on the other side he was just like
[00:13:58] done like you did like a stroke or something he was in the hospital and then
[00:14:01] he just just dead so he seemed okay but my grandma she spent like five years
[00:14:06] in a fucking nursing home just slowly dying the nursing home is the worst
[00:14:10] yeah i'm trying to get got if i'm in a nursing home
[00:14:13] someone put two in the back of my head that's what everybody says and then
[00:14:16] guess what happens you end up in the fucking nursing home
[00:14:19] yeah you will not be i'm dying early i mean if anyone's dying early it's
[00:14:23] it's me and you had him just gonna live forever yeah yeah it's gonna be
[00:14:28] i'm i'm just gonna be one of those guys that starts getting plastic surgery
[00:14:33] hell yeah yeah that was awesome you're gonna look like
[00:14:35] Phil Spector dude you just stupid hair and you're
[00:14:39] fucking stupid earring look at a little Chinese yeah right because your i just
[00:14:42] you just pull your eyes so that's my favorite is like a old collagen lip
[00:14:46] injection yeah huge you know those old guys that are still like
[00:14:50] trying to dress like it's fucking 1985 or whatever yeah i love it the shitty
[00:14:54] mullet you know yeah haircut and the shitty sunglasses and they're like god
[00:14:58] i was actually cool back in the day no you tried to be
[00:15:01] right right right right yeah all the cool guys died
[00:15:04] exactly that's why you're still alive that's my best uh that's my favorite
[00:15:07] friend leeberwood's take where she talks about like
[00:15:10] how every gay guy now is a fucking loser because anyone who was cool had got
[00:15:13] AIDS and died that's so fucking good man
[00:15:19] she's like it she's funny shit yeah she rules man i know i know i'm
[00:15:23] sure we were robbed of the best gay guys no i shouldn't be playing battlefield
[00:15:26] during the show yeah but hold on this is the new update
[00:15:30] it's in the name of the sar all right try and do are trying to one kill
[00:15:35] czar you fucking idiot no it's the russian one not
[00:15:38] not czar it's tsa are that czar bitch czar yes it's different spelling you
[00:15:44] fucking moron no it's you're right from it's derived from the same word
[00:15:48] which is caesar czar you think it's pronounced czar
[00:15:51] mama man it's czar nicolas yeah dude czar
[00:15:55] is that anestasia's dad uh it's uh it's george
[00:16:01] fives cousin i think or george six yeah that was fucked up all all
[00:16:06] all kings and she were just like cousins there yeah before uh world war one
[00:16:10] yeah and that's what all wars is like yo you fucking looked at my girlfriend
[00:16:15] thanks dude i'm gonna fucking kill a quarter of all the
[00:16:19] men here contrary under the age 18 holy shit dude monarchies are fucking gay
[00:16:23] shit yeah yeah they gave us a greek king just like
[00:16:27] chill us out after the thing it was just some german guy
[00:16:29] it's like after world war you're gonna give us a king
[00:16:32] it was after um it's like checkers dude after the revolution so like after
[00:16:38] in the 1800s i guess i don't fucking remember that's my favorite shot i put a
[00:16:42] little checker on the tip of my dick and then i hit the back wall
[00:16:45] and i go king me bitch i'm immediately she goes yeah that wasn't
[00:16:51] that hurts please get the checker out of my cut out of my pussy
[00:16:54] oh this guy just cut my head off that was fucking tight
[00:16:58] that was cool he fucking sorted your ass yeah
[00:17:02] oh fuck dude fuck the czar yeah there weren't swords in world war two
[00:17:06] world war one was last sword i bet you they got a couple swords in the mix like
[00:17:10] an old fashion guy who loved the swords like i think for maybe dress uniform as
[00:17:14] people would have yeah and everyone's who was there's still swords now
[00:17:18] yeah they're like little knives what are you talking about bayon? no not bayonets
[00:17:22] dude you talking about just straight up swords yeah
[00:17:26] like world war one dudes had swords world war one dude that must have sucked
[00:17:30] so much dick just being entrenched it was got fucking your feet smell bad
[00:17:35] you know everyone's got it's fucking moldy as fuck
[00:17:39] there's probably the porridge bridge bad too probably eating that shit with
[00:17:43] water i don't know i don't have a milk porridge where the fuck are you getting
[00:17:46] a milk in that trench the civil war is the best they just lived off hard
[00:17:49] tack oh it's just like a spoiled saltine
[00:17:53] yeah it's like well time to go try not die for 18 straight hours of shitty
[00:17:59] crackers fucking civil war rules i love that the Ken Burns documentary the
[00:18:03] guy is like writing a letter to his dad he has like a fucking uh
[00:18:08] he's like one day a battle he got shot under one ear and the bullet came out
[00:18:13] like the front of his face oh they just like put a banding oh my god dude
[00:18:19] you fucking just went back to war fuck dude that's what i was thinking
[00:18:23] and when you have a bullet go through through your fucking head and you're
[00:18:27] like i'm not dead you're like i'm going home boys yeah
[00:18:30] they're like no actually well you're gonna just
[00:18:33] listen man if you want you know slavery to keep going i mean if you're as devoted
[00:18:37] to states rights as that guy it's because you just think heritage not
[00:18:40] hate yeah apparently uh this is something i heard
[00:18:44] recently uh i had heard this from someone else
[00:18:48] mm-hmm uh the south the csa had way more amputees
[00:18:54] from overdressing wounds because they had i don't i don't think i don't think it's
[00:18:59] fair to say that like the confederacy was hate based
[00:19:03] it was about slavery but it's like slavery was just a thing going on then
[00:19:08] and it's not like they hated it but they didn't hate it
[00:19:13] they loved the idea of not having to work i think
[00:19:16] no i think it's not like you know i mean it's a guy a guy today that's
[00:19:22] pro-slavery is much worse than a guy in 1860 that was pro-slavery well
[00:19:27] that's how you can take the other approach which is saying that
[00:19:30] they didn't necessarily like black people all that much in the north
[00:19:34] they were just opposed to the institution of slits how is that a funny take to
[00:19:37] have no i'm just saying that's like a more appropriate yeah
[00:19:40] wow good point adam welcome to seven's grade revelations
[00:19:45] with adam freeland oh i got a professional comedian
[00:19:50] have you ever wondered like really dude what about our founding fathers
[00:19:54] they were good guys though right yeah no dude they own slaves what
[00:19:58] yeah oh wow yeah holy shit i was just disappointed to find out that all the
[00:20:03] mountain rushmore guys weren't actually that big
[00:20:06] that's how you got to be president if you were a giant
[00:20:09] guy just like well i guess it's fucking this guy
[00:20:12] the only guy with a big ass head yeah yeah paul bunion
[00:20:18] his ox was up once he lost uh he lost the fucking stupid story
[00:20:23] probably his blue ox yeah that's what like that's what entertainment was before
[00:20:26] television in america is like people tell him stories check this out
[00:20:36] do you ever hear about that and he had a fucking cow but guess what it was a
[00:20:39] fucking blue cow the cow is blue and he used to pick the cow up
[00:20:43] didn't uh anyways that's how the great lakes were created is
[00:20:47] his footsteps so you know like that's right i got another one for you
[00:20:51] there's a guy uh oh he's a john henry who got beat by a machine
[00:20:56] you think paul bunion ever used the fucking geysers as a fucking bidet
[00:21:00] that's pretty cool you know he just puts his asshole on the fucking that would be
[00:21:03] sick i thought i thought it would have all came out of colonic
[00:21:06] oh uh hot bidet did they make those a hot bidet
[00:21:09] hot bidet he did a pretty holly sure i feel like i've been in straight up
[00:21:12] inventor mode the last couple months mmm i've had so many good ideas
[00:21:16] name one uh the aromatic disfuser that that has a bunch of
[00:21:22] base smells in a carousel in it and then it's hooked up to is the mic picking
[00:21:28] up you just laying it on your chest yeah it's picking up all right here let
[00:21:31] me check yeah that works okay damn it is stopping if you get me
[00:21:35] killed you have to understand i'm in battle right now
[00:21:37] yeah nik has been playing from the moment he mentioned battlefield he has
[00:21:41] been playing battlefield i was hiding in an attic for a while that's that's a
[00:21:45] cool this here you know what we're gonna do my name of the
[00:21:47] sar review here yes there is a name of the sar review
[00:21:52] this is are you fucking uh they have an attic you can hide in
[00:21:55] very realistic interesting just like that's what adam does when every plays
[00:21:59] every one yeah that was you know it's my opinion that
[00:22:03] that was world war two actually people should have known that the nazis were
[00:22:06] coming based on germany's helmet choices in world war one
[00:22:10] they had a little spike spike that rules yeah god it sucks how cool the evil
[00:22:15] guys uniforms always are where the evil in world war one
[00:22:18] yeah i think so well i've been the hunches those dishadowed like
[00:22:22] there's you have a subconscious understanding that our entire notions
[00:22:26] of good and evil are reversed the good guys embrace skulls and spikes
[00:22:31] and snakes and stuff like that that's why it's cool that's why a part of you
[00:22:35] knows deep down that you would much rather be
[00:22:38] in a shiny s s uniform you know you're talking straight stylistically
[00:22:44] uh stylist google boss s s dude i tried on a Hugo boss suit and i look like
[00:22:49] fucking shit yeah that's how you know you're not a real
[00:22:52] was this like sexy spanish guy who's in like really good shape
[00:22:56] and you know he's trying to sell me a fucking $1,200 suit right
[00:23:00] not buying right and he's like you know it just looks bad on me and he's like
[00:23:04] yes maybe you'll try a different one see you have
[00:23:07] me and you we have the same body type so they want to look good on you and it's
[00:23:11] like they just trained you to say that we have the same body type you're like
[00:23:17] a much better looking person than i am yeah you get that's funny that
[00:23:20] when you're at a certain kind of fat people will stop even respect it won't
[00:23:24] even lie to you i was like i was trying on a suit and i was like yeah you know
[00:23:28] i can go with this one i think maybe this size or maybe the smallest size you
[00:23:31] know i'm planning to lose a little weight and the guy was like yeah i've heard
[00:23:34] that one before it's like what the fuck i'm trying to buy a suit
[00:23:39] that's calling me a fucking lie i gotta suit for you
[00:23:43] you're like this is a camping tent that's what happened to me when i try
[00:23:48] i'm trying to buy a bike by the way if anyone is a free bike they want to give
[00:23:51] me in New York City no we're going to china town after this
[00:23:54] day when i lived in china town i was i used to live in berry and canal
[00:23:58] and it's like right right at the mouth of the fucking manhattan bridge
[00:24:02] yo yes yes and some guy comes barreling down the manhattan bridge
[00:24:06] and then down berry and he's just looking at everyone on the sidewalk and he's
[00:24:10] riding this bike screaming bike bike five hours five hours bike
[00:24:14] i'm just like he had just stolen that shit
[00:24:19] five hour bike now i got him that fucking rules my neighbors the bike
[00:24:25] thieves are having a big bike sale right now big bike blow up should we go over
[00:24:28] there i want to see the sign i want i want to see the sign i want to
[00:24:31] put a honda night heart they got that fucking like the motorcycle that's on
[00:24:34] there at mid eighties it's now who owns all those bikes they're these like two
[00:24:38] like cool motorcycle that's a great name for like
[00:24:41] night oh two months it's about to be three cool motorcycle guys i know
[00:24:44] sorry is a fucking is guy number three oh now you're gonna be a motorcycle
[00:24:48] i thought you were getting motorcycles i think one of you because you look like
[00:24:51] a fucking idiot on a motorcycle why would i look like an idiot
[00:24:54] a much stronger man with a mustache you guys are both gonna die on a motorcycle
[00:25:01] that's fine that's well yeah i'm not gonna wear a helmet obviously yeah
[00:25:04] because then you're you're a fucking bitch dude um so
[00:25:07] fuck wait whoa look at that guy i'm a broad dog
[00:25:09] killed by so with tis tis avi is a lady with his avi
[00:25:13] avi yeah everybody update your avi is that
[00:25:17] do is it what is it it's avi avi yeah for avatar
[00:25:22] it's not it's not an acronym avi since for
[00:25:30] intercourse oh done come on oh like a file type
[00:25:35] that's what the wait when you like shit a woman's pussy yeah exactly
[00:25:40] when you fucking go ask to ask with her ask to pussy like in the that's how
[00:25:43] that's the ultimate sexual assault you think there's a straight guy
[00:25:47] straight in quotes at an atom who uh uses a dildo and puts it in his ass and he
[00:25:52] fucks his wife while his wife puts it in her pussy like they go ask to ask
[00:25:56] double-sided yeah i'm thinking of shit in the pussy is the ultimate
[00:25:59] that's alpha move no that's like the highest crime
[00:26:04] i think it's gotta be difficult i mean that
[00:26:07] yeah it's gotta be a nape and it's gotta be a big
[00:26:09] gonna have a big opening not die not diarrhea but like a
[00:26:13] mushy turn you gotta be you gotta be a top tier
[00:26:15] section you gotta be Cosby dude that shit
[00:26:19] Cosby probably did that yeah i think you need some
[00:26:21] that's a thing baby or a funnel you need mushy shit
[00:26:25] no there is that your dick doesn't work so good
[00:26:29] do you see when you become an old man it doesn't work so what you would do is
[00:26:36] you would put the pill in a drink i would pull down the pants i would
[00:26:42] put my ass up to a pussy and i would take a shit
[00:26:45] to pussy i would put the two holes together and i would take the shit out
[00:26:52] of my ass directly into her vagina you see
[00:26:59] is what you would do thank you brother thank you for that one
[00:27:04] yeah i i'm i'm waiting to respond what's the up to man what's what's the cause
[00:27:09] up to has he cleared his name that's what he has been
[00:27:14] zombie this is now i've been cleared of all charges so what i've been to what
[00:27:20] is put it by us directly up to child's mouth
[00:27:26] you see that it took a shit out of my ass they are
[00:27:30] is that that's definitely child abuse is it molestation
[00:27:33] no i don't know that's an interesting question somebody told me
[00:27:36] she the child's mouth no no not pussy mouth somebody told me last night that
[00:27:42] Charlie and the chocolate factory Charlie was originally supposed to be black
[00:27:46] chocolate Charlie and the factory that's good that's um but i and i didn't
[00:27:51] wasn't i started thinking about chocolate Charlie and the factory as soon as he
[00:27:54] said that i didn't hear the real reason as to
[00:27:57] why they didn't make him black because it's a book
[00:28:01] so you could just say nothing and he could be anything right i don't remember
[00:28:06] a point that book where they're like charlie a white who is white by the way
[00:28:10] went to the factory with his grandfather that's the magic of literature in fact
[00:28:15] any book i read i assume the characters are black women
[00:28:18] yep yep christmas shocked when i said black
[00:28:25] vol de morte is almost a black woman's name
[00:28:28] yeah vol de morte sort of like a androgynous black like uh
[00:28:32] valdy singer like uh you could just go singer kind of vol de morte
[00:28:36] yeah the morte is the hard part but vald
[00:28:39] you could you could get that in the mix of the black lady's name
[00:28:41] vol de morte there we go um yeah vol de morte you know it's like his nose
[00:28:46] your nose looks like two pussies vol de morte
[00:28:50] i don't know i don't know anything about harry potter
[00:28:52] some it's good i'm backing off this one
[00:28:55] wow dude it's not you read all the harry potters yeah baby i'm a hp boy
[00:29:00] i'm a hula packer i thought it was about hula
[00:29:04] packer i read them too i guess i said remember i tell you that story
[00:29:08] but i've been at my uh community college and there was this
[00:29:13] like large retarded man that was like attending classes there and it wasn't
[00:29:19] this what you were thinking not and they had a fucking uh
[00:29:23] as well you said large not a little ass fucking
[00:29:26] frail wrong retarded bitch strong mentally retarded
[00:29:32] uh no they had a big retarded guy there and you know i'd always see in there
[00:29:36] and he had this stack of papers and he was sitting in his a windy day and a
[00:29:39] gust of wind blew off those papers all over the place
[00:29:43] he's like oh no i felt bad and so i'm like
[00:29:46] running around trying to pick up all these fucking papers with like the breeze
[00:29:50] going by and then like i've got him i'm like helping him
[00:29:53] to get like a stack of my look down and he's just printed off a list of every
[00:29:57] pokemon i thought it was like work or something holy fucking shit
[00:30:06] i was like not anything holy shit that is better than every
[00:30:10] joke i was thinking to make yeah yeah i was going through the options my
[00:30:18] and if there's no information about them it is just the names
[00:30:22] yeah that rules no pictures no pictures this is a list of names
[00:30:28] is it alphabetical oh i don't remember i don't know i don't think well there was
[00:30:32] a song the pokemon list is an alphabet you're right it's in order they
[00:30:35] wasn't there a song in the pokemon show where they'd
[00:30:37] sing the names of all the pokemon i don't think so no not the theme song
[00:30:42] no the theme song is you're going to be the very best the best
[00:30:46] suck my team take the time to learn the test and then you will become the
[00:30:50] fuck them is your pokemon that is you and now you're a pokemon
[00:30:58] you weren't wanting now you are a pokemon
[00:31:05] that's exactly how the theme song goes oh yeah what's up with misti though
[00:31:08] who would you fucking poke him on the most misti there's misti there's
[00:31:11] nurse joy there's the rocket lady i didn't really
[00:31:14] false choice nurse joy dude the fucking nurse dude come on
[00:31:18] i don't remember who's that misti was a child wasn't she was not a fucking child
[00:31:22] adam's into children i can't wait until adam goes down like
[00:31:25] Anthony wiener what are you talking about that's going to happen
[00:31:28] and uh adam's going to be sexing with some fucking 15 year old
[00:31:31] adam's also there's also been a picture of adam
[00:31:33] hard in a bed with Anthony wiener son yeah
[00:31:37] that was consensual Anthony said it good
[00:31:41] tony i hate it had to be you he ruined the whole world man
[00:31:46] yeah you've been trying to get that bit going for a while
[00:31:49] that one didn't do too hot at the show last night
[00:31:51] it was okay not too hot all right yeah i went to ruin
[00:31:57] the world this is a nice little deliverer that weird inflection you chose to
[00:32:01] do on that bit oh that's cool he didn't really ruin the
[00:32:04] one i think that's a pretty big stretch you know well the combi letter was
[00:32:07] because of him yeah but combi combi was reopening the
[00:32:10] investigation ten days before my man my man wanted to do some dirt
[00:32:14] dude i don't know what james was up to but
[00:32:16] he wasn't wiener would have been something else no
[00:32:18] combi made it clear the election was super close he didn't recommend charges
[00:32:23] that he felt that hillary clinton should lose the election
[00:32:27] but shouldn't face charges and that's like he more or less said that when he
[00:32:31] said if this had been someone in my organization
[00:32:35] i would not recommend charges but they would lose their job
[00:32:38] and the job being president of the united states
[00:32:41] that's all bitch i mean he like spelled it out yeah
[00:32:45] i don't know i wasn't paying too much attention and use
[00:32:48] yeah i'm not one of those fucking reading fucking bitches i'm like somebody
[00:32:52] but he just said you read all the harry potter books yeah yeah this week
[00:32:56] stuff about that's like thousands of people stuff about wizards and magic
[00:33:00] not fucking nerd shit like yeah the fantasy for you is uh that a
[00:33:05] broom could fit in between your legs these are fat thoughts
[00:33:09] you fit we know impossible there's no there's never been any air travel if
[00:33:14] it's from your knees up i have a thigh gap dude
[00:33:17] there you don't i have that sexy ass bbw thigh game
[00:33:21] that actually gram shit she is like up oh on the show i'm possible
[00:33:26] on the show a couple weeks ago yes i said that
[00:33:29] test holiday no now i'm confused again london andrews i said london andrews
[00:33:34] ellexes texas was unattractive yeah she's like a man test holiday
[00:33:39] oh i don't know test holiday london and holiday i confused for some reason
[00:33:43] because they go on holiday that's what vacation is and
[00:33:46] that's great why don't we say that that's fun to go on holiday
[00:33:49] on a holiday that's cool it's fun anytime i go to the bank i say i'm on
[00:33:53] jewish holiday yeah it's russia shawn every time i deposit a
[00:34:00] is that atonement which is what russia's yum keep
[00:34:03] yum keep yeah yum yum i love it simpson long
[00:34:09] where skitters just on the phone he's like well i understand the child's
[00:34:12] parents are angry super intended but i mean come on it sounded so made up
[00:34:20] that is really fucking good yeah penis man about that one yeah
[00:34:26] penis man you've got to stick your dick inside
[00:34:30] of your own dad bum bum bum bum get your dad's dick
[00:34:40] pokemon it's a show about fucking your dad
[00:34:44] i know you think it's about animals you fuck
[00:34:47] but there's a bunch of subliminal messages
[00:34:51] that tell you to fuck your dad okay man
[00:34:55] then you set the theme song the theme song is pretty explicit
[00:35:01] you are supposed to fuck your dad after watching the show
[00:35:09] oh fuck yeah dude oh yeah let's get back good at singing
[00:35:12] you are man yeah that was good i know it's thanks
[00:35:15] let's get back to who you would fucking pokemon so
[00:35:18] mr charizard there's charizard he's wearing your dick on
[00:35:22] he'd bring your dick dude i want a lava bidet and i want to fuck charizard
[00:35:26] i would fuck a foil charizard japanese yeah no you know you fuck
[00:35:31] japanese oh yeah the fuck it the holographic holographic
[00:35:34] holographic big titted blackface bokeh yes
[00:35:38] were there any other pokemon with tits um
[00:35:41] hmm i don't know jiggly puffed dude something later get the fuck
[00:35:46] some of the later pokemon there's one that's there's one now that's just a set of
[00:35:49] us noralax while he's passed up oh whoa yeah
[00:35:54] so noralax got spanish flood how about horlax
[00:35:57] horlax how about she was asking for yep
[00:36:01] horlax wasn't that cosmething also that he
[00:36:04] make them take a shower he liked wet hair how dare he
[00:36:08] that is the worst part of what he did you're right it's not the worst part but
[00:36:11] it's a really strange detail yeah i mean yeah you don't think rapists are
[00:36:16] like big on hygiene i guess it's not even hygiene it's just wet hair
[00:36:20] it's like a wet hair fetish do you like wet i'll take some wet hair i like a
[00:36:24] fresh i'm not look of all the things to disagree with
[00:36:27] cosbeon fucking someone with wet hair with wet hair i would love to be
[00:36:32] groomed like an emperor every day yeah i wonder how much that costs
[00:36:36] i want silk sheets and i want to be groomed every day damn dude yay
[00:36:40] that'd be awesome every day somebody just fucking
[00:36:43] thank you at a hotel that's what i'm trying to live like dude would be
[00:36:47] awesome i stayed in a hotel i didn't even say in a hotel i stayed in
[00:36:51] like uh uh quarters like off base well not it was on a military base but like
[00:36:57] just where they quarter you if you right you know are coming in from a different
[00:37:01] base or whatever for the wedding or whatever yeah from my cousin's
[00:37:04] wedding and uh it's like man fuck i like i have the money to buy a
[00:37:10] bed now yep be living like shit you need a fucking you need a servant
[00:37:14] dude i do i need a slave i saved the money by just
[00:37:19] getting a slave which i found out is okay as long as they're from the
[00:37:24] philipino yeah yeah well it's okay but you have to
[00:37:27] write a think piece about oh you do you want to do that 20 years after yeah
[00:37:34] man i just can't stand how white people don't get
[00:37:36] like culture it's different it's about the same
[00:37:40] you want to compare slavery to uh imprisoning someone in your house
[00:37:45] and making them work for no money for their entire lives
[00:37:50] like there's any comparison between the two
[00:37:52] nope they actually one happens to black people yeah
[00:37:55] the philipino work for slave is actually it's similar to grandma
[00:37:59] happy friend yeah so it means it okay and there's
[00:38:02] certainly no word in english definitely not mammy that's even close
[00:38:08] so a similar concept doesn't exist in english god i love that shit i
[00:38:12] didn't even bother to read that shit because i don't give a fuck at all
[00:38:15] but you know that's the those are the kinds of moments where i just have
[00:38:18] like the biggest shitty yes yes yes yes this is a
[00:38:22] fucking culture that tries to excuse everything right exactly
[00:38:26] nicole maulin iro just a deep sigh and then like saying
[00:38:30] the horrible shit you didn't they're like but i feel a cat about it so it's
[00:38:34] fine it's not white people it's not a holla cost
[00:38:37] white people yeah why can you understand that when we take out
[00:38:42] all of the the lesser race jalapenos in the woods
[00:38:48] and cut off their heads with machete's it's because of
[00:38:55] the holiday that's a it's a beautiful holiday we're
[00:38:59] having yep i don't know something like that that's how that's the original
[00:39:03] recipe for yeah you know what's a Filipino food well it's just like
[00:39:07] that june lumpia lumpia yeah it's like that june
[00:39:10] june is popping there was a shooting in a church in
[00:39:14] Nashville this week yeah it's southern culture heritage
[00:39:18] well it was it was uh it was a two-neese guy yeah well i thought trump would
[00:39:23] tweet about it but he just stayed going on with the fucking NFL
[00:39:26] NFL shit which is like trump that was a golden opportunity for you
[00:39:30] i know it was a Sudanese guy that shot up like a church or whatever
[00:39:33] fox was like the only people covering it
[00:39:36] New York Times covered it but like wasn't linking it to it anywhere on their
[00:39:40] page their front page uh and then in the related stories it was all just
[00:39:44] dill and roost stuff because it was like church
[00:39:48] students in the travel ban it's one yeah but he came like 30 years ago i know
[00:39:55] he did yeah yeah so what happened but the Sudanese guy shot up a church
[00:40:00] he shot up a church and he's probably just crazy based on his
[00:40:02] spoke post oh what was he a lot of rick and morty stuff
[00:40:07] yeah he was all he shouted i'm pickle ring he brought he shot up the place
[00:40:12] man rick and morty's funny but i really don't like people that look
[00:40:14] it rules it's fucking rules the show is incredible but yeah it's
[00:40:17] just amazing yeah it sucks dick Dan Harmon is a lot of baking guys
[00:40:21] right are now you know what i mean like a lot of baking guys are now
[00:40:25] working morty guys yeah of course chive chive guys are working guys unfortunately
[00:40:29] a lot of for the win guys oh yes brother yeah well anything good is
[00:40:33] immediately ruined by people that suck yeah well fans of any america
[00:40:38] slavery there were a couple of good there were
[00:40:43] early on some of those guys wait who are you mean the slaves or the slave
[00:40:49] authors uh Eugene uh used to sims the third he was a good guy
[00:40:56] yeah early 1800s he was doing a lot of pretty cool stuff
[00:41:01] slavery i like the early stuff yeah the slavery
[00:41:06] imma know like early era travel slavery you know before got bad
[00:41:12] yeah before they're you know making fight dogs and stuff
[00:41:16] that's when uh they had more of like sort of like a
[00:41:19] commune feel yeah you know yeah i thought it was like
[00:41:23] those are my favorite takes where it's like look they had a place to stay
[00:41:27] they preferred being out they got a lot of vitamin d
[00:41:30] yeah like jesus fucking christ that's still happening
[00:41:34] you're still making that argument well my favorite is the argument where it's
[00:41:38] like well it's a lot better than the jungles of africa
[00:41:42] and it's like just your mental image of africa is like
[00:41:47] a 20 20 square foot area filled with snakes and white
[00:42:00] it's like the rainforest cafe in your mind
[00:42:05] which like there are parts of the world like that
[00:42:08] with people that live there but the people that live there are all like
[00:42:12] four foot seven and they do nothing but like wait till they turn 12 so they
[00:42:16] can go through a ritual where they shove ants down their
[00:42:19] dig bowl yeah yeah and then like you wouldn't want those
[00:42:22] people as slaves they have those cool because they would just be
[00:42:25] shoving ants in their dig all day and not doing it
[00:42:28] not strong they have this cool like lego man haircuts though
[00:42:31] yeah they're all like holy yeah i was known you guys
[00:42:32] there's like black i think they're like chinese almost here but it's like
[00:42:37] in a bob they'll give each other bull cuts and put
[00:42:40] bullet ants in their fucking ass i had to come man
[00:42:44] there's something like less than ten tribes that have
[00:42:47] have absolutely no contact with the outside world and still have
[00:42:51] had no contact with the outside world and they're all in like the
[00:42:53] amazon congo whatever yeah simple dude just unplug
[00:42:57] you should go to tribe number one brooklyn hipster
[00:43:00] oh fuck yeah you want to talk about being out of touch
[00:43:05] yeah everyone who lives in brooklyn except me
[00:43:07] yeah i'm me i'm different i'm yeah i'm the cool one
[00:43:11] the guy with a podcast yeah even though we embody
[00:43:16] every horrible stereo guy a guy from brooklyn that is a professional
[00:43:21] podcast yeah on paper that's like vomit and yeah yeah no no
[00:43:26] not from brooklyn exactly not from is a guy who literally on a way to get
[00:43:30] stuff like something yeah yeah we're gonna get any
[00:43:33] massage we're gonna get a track bike we're going bicycle and
[00:43:36] fucking uh essential oil diffuser shopping
[00:43:40] we fucking suck dick dude i mean you're bicycle shopping i'm going to get
[00:43:44] rubbed out by a chinese man you know i was intimidated by going to china
[00:43:48] town to get a massage because i didn't want it to turn into a jack off
[00:43:51] thing but you can just go have a man do it
[00:43:53] yeah in the manjaxio and it's uh it's not they've got stronger hands it's a
[00:43:57] better massage it feels yeah they know their way around a
[00:44:00] cock because they have their hair yeah yeah they know what guys like
[00:44:02] yeah yeah yeah exactly their hands their forearms are strong from
[00:44:07] driving that big wheel in the bus that they moonlight is
[00:44:12] a fun law drive i remember one time in high school me and my friends were like
[00:44:15] out in the desert kissing smoking weed other suck no my friend my friend oh
[00:44:19] that's what you guys call the smoking weed yeah shut the fuck up okay my friend uh
[00:44:23] my friend you put a blunt in your ass yeah we're gonna pass around uh Ben's
[00:44:28] j his giant dick we're all gonna smoke an L
[00:44:35] a long smoothie anyway so you guys are having gay
[00:44:42] child sex so there's five children sucking each other's cocks in the
[00:44:46] deserts of los vegas no sure dude i'm not gonna this is what you get for
[00:44:52] saying shut up i never said shut you just said shut up
[00:44:59] you say shut up it becomes twice do you get twice the
[00:45:04] the tip of the spear well i got a tip of the spear for you pal
[00:45:08] do you oh yeah wait a minute you have a sharp dick
[00:45:12] uh kind of that'd be good i have kind of a try i because it pulls back
[00:45:16] because the foreskin pulls back it's sharp you get shit
[00:45:20] uh after sex stuck in in that thing no you you rinse it out sometime i mean
[00:45:24] maybe you gotta fold it back and rinse it out
[00:45:26] mm-hmm get period stuff stuck in there ever
[00:45:29] you what do you use like a q-tip and go around there yeah how do you clean
[00:45:33] that how do i clean it yeah you can do about foreskin cleaning tips yeah i'm
[00:45:36] interested to have the nice warm washcloth you know
[00:45:39] fucking pull the hotel towel is that what you say a washcloth i hope you know
[00:45:44] what i would like i would like to get my sack cinched up
[00:45:48] you know you have a smaller have a permanently tight sack
[00:45:52] like it's cold always yeah i think about getting Botox
[00:45:55] getting smooth balls and then putting a smiley face on them
[00:45:59] just pretty good yeah but you're talking smaller you just want it small and
[00:46:03] tight yeah it's nice small tight tight like
[00:46:06] like yeah so it looks like my balls are fucking ripped
[00:46:08] yeah oh you want to draw little abs on your balls i want abs on the bottom of
[00:46:12] my diff i think that would be pretty cool
[00:46:16] yeah i know exactly what i mean we're gonna get to have my regular abs
[00:46:20] continue all the way down the front of my diff
[00:46:22] ooh so i just look like an alligator whoa cool
[00:46:26] and you have a bumpy little ridge dick for her pleasure yeah well for my pleasure
[00:46:30] to look at look at my many abs would you
[00:46:36] would you beat off to your own dick if it had abs
[00:46:38] uh how do you do that you would look at it while beating on you just be like
[00:46:43] nice nice nice you already look at your own dick
[00:46:47] of course is that what the bodybuilding thing about
[00:46:49] is that everybody does that no i do you know look at porn just get hard and then
[00:46:54] you look in the mirror yeah the point is to get you started
[00:46:57] it's a it's a it's a catalyst yeah and what's your american psycho and then you
[00:47:01] sync up with all the sex scenes and flex in the mirror and look at yourself
[00:47:05] and then look back at christian bale that's so funny when he's in the
[00:47:10] the doggy style flex thing and oh my god
[00:47:14] it's hilarious it's a good news have you ever filmed a sex
[00:47:17] that's sex no have you ever filmed the sex that's a funny way to say that
[00:47:21] yeah do the sex that's the sex that's hilarious remember me we're saying
[00:47:25] the sex oh that's just the sex yeah that shit sucked
[00:47:30] wait people were saying that yeah that's the sex yeah like saying it was cool
[00:47:34] like the shit yeah it was horrible that's the sex that's the
[00:47:38] you know what i want to start saying what is that like a reddit thing
[00:47:41] i don't know it's like a nerd thing no it's a black guy thing it's a black
[00:47:44] guy thing you think i i wouldn't have made a spec for it yeah i respect
[00:47:47] i didn't start saying it tremendous respect i don't think it was a black i
[00:47:50] think it was the sex that's only who i heard say it
[00:47:54] was it a dc thing it was not a baltimore thing it was i it was more like
[00:47:59] i always associated kind of with like online nerds actually
[00:48:03] sounds pretty nerdy yeah i i remember distinctly only hearing black i
[00:48:07] say interesting yeah well pound off in the comments guys
[00:48:11] let us know who invented that's the sex that's not sure personally i'm sure
[00:48:15] it was black people i'm sure that it was taken from them
[00:48:18] uh-huh it was appropriated yep which i can't stand i don't like your
[00:48:23] negative you know i don't know about your sarcastic tone about when you say
[00:48:26] stuff like that because the truth is that i guess
[00:48:29] a lot of culture has been appropriated from african-americans
[00:48:32] i think plenty mm-hmm well check your tone man i just i thought it's like a
[00:48:36] really fucked up joke that i i feel like i can't even say on the
[00:48:40] podcast wow that's gonna be pretty bad i'm saving for after
[00:48:42] all right cool it's a good one though i i believe it i see the smile on
[00:48:46] yeah yeah you got the same smile when you say it's a slur
[00:48:49] right i mean i'm guessing no it's actually no slur and oh interesting
[00:48:54] it's an extremely offensive your mind makes you do the slurring yeah yeah
[00:48:59] now your mind doesn't make you do it's a really bad it's on the part with the
[00:49:03] pounded warrior thing yes every month to build up the courage
[00:49:10] uh fuck dude you see trump tweeting about pat tillman the other day
[00:49:14] yeah which is like he got killed by his should just not acknowledge
[00:49:18] like the president should never talk about pat tillman yeah he was killed by
[00:49:22] all his own guys yeah he got got friendly fire i got i'm imagining i was a guy like
[00:49:26] you was a fucking hero you it was it was like a sort of an
[00:49:29] adam character you know you're like you know the uh percy in the green
[00:49:33] mile yeah the guy that just really wants to execute somebody but yeah
[00:49:38] he's pants you're like that guy you know you're like you're like this from
[00:49:42] battlefield earth that guy dude i love battlefield earth i tried
[00:49:46] there's you know i would love to watch i oh we should do that so we'll go
[00:49:49] go go buy we'll go buy the bicycle come back here to many
[00:49:52] activities it's bicycle shopping day you're going on a date
[00:49:55] battlefield earth it's what these like fucking noon dates you go on
[00:49:59] that's not he's going on a nighttime day he already said he was
[00:50:02] what well what time what time are you going on a date i got a fucking dude we got
[00:50:06] he what do you want my whole schedule i don't know what time it is
[00:50:09] i think we're gonna have a nice afternoon but i'm not coming back to watch
[00:50:12] battlefield earth i gotta clean my room yeah i mean battlefield earth is it
[00:50:16] the last time i watched it i was drinking which was
[00:50:19] you know it's perfect i did a drinking game where you take a shot
[00:50:23] every time john's revolt affects laughs so you're drunk
[00:50:28] you're drunk a million three minutes i want to see that so bad
[00:50:32] you've never seen it i'm gonna i'm gonna fucking pull it up special
[00:50:35] yeah i used to actually when i was like 12 i used to rent that movie all the
[00:50:39] time yeah how the blast you know about that
[00:50:44] man animal that's a line in that man animal how the big
[00:50:48] cause of humans man animals how the blast do you know about that man
[00:50:53] oh yes and then the aliens are just people with dreadlocks and the idea is
[00:50:57] that's how it's a Scientology star named berry pepper in a starring berry
[00:51:01] pepper that's which is like no berry pepper is not
[00:51:04] Percy who's Percy in the green mile some that's what i was actually a little
[00:51:08] sniveling weasel berry pepper maybe in the green mile but is one of the other
[00:51:12] that's a great name berry pepper such a good name no it's uh it's sick man
[00:51:20] uh uh michael clark duncan michael clark duncan so you're saying i'm like
[00:51:25] michael clark duncan no from the green mile i'm magic like the god
[00:51:28] you chills michael hulking don't know you're a
[00:51:31] bitch you're like yago the parrot but with the
[00:51:34] personality of yago from shakespeare uh from
[00:51:38] the same rockwell merchant of venice no uh the
[00:51:41] rockwell is great that oh dude huh i saw sam rockwell in
[00:51:45] these village about a year ago and i followed him for a couple blocks
[00:51:49] that's cool he's probably really happy that that you did that yeah i got a real
[00:51:54] close and i breathed heavy on the back of his neck and you were like i fucking
[00:51:57] love this is an illegal i love to chuck i loved your
[00:52:01] two-second scene in the original teenage mini-nigitorals movie
[00:52:05] my favorite work my favorite work is or who's the hockey mask guy in teenage
[00:52:10] mini-nigitorals no that guy's got a weird name
[00:52:13] he messed that the it's kasey jones is a character and he's played by kasey
[00:52:17] kason uh fuck elias cotius cotius who sounds like a greek man
[00:52:25] yeah he's i think he's greek elia elia kazan yeah the snitch
[00:52:30] cotius or something like that or what this guy elia kazan like a film he's a
[00:52:34] director he like ratted on all these communists
[00:52:37] oh really yeah was he greek piece of shit yeah i think he was
[00:52:40] kind of dead oh yeah yeah classic yeah now he's the reason that like hollywood
[00:52:44] had like a blabber Jesus Christ his daughter is an actress now uh
[00:52:48] zoe kazan she's like a really annoying hilary person
[00:52:51] oh i'm like show your sis she's worse than her dad no same rock well
[00:52:56] same rock well is in the uh in the original teenage movie how the
[00:53:00] fuck does that as as just oh i thought he was greek
[00:53:04] elia kazan god damn it hell yeah not us fuck
[00:53:08] not us not us not us oh that's sick god damn it
[00:53:13] gazan zoglu was his original name oh i wonder why it changed it
[00:53:18] god damn it to sound more july because he was embarrassed i can't decide a
[00:53:21] secret or the use better than uh the first one uh
[00:53:26] sorcerer stone no i think so i like secret of the use
[00:53:30] it's good gobletifier what secrets stop making fun of hp man
[00:53:37] fuck is god so i don't remember those at all i remember the video game turtles
[00:53:42] and time for super nes yeah yeah that was fun yeah
[00:53:46] that was fun game fuck should i change my name to for hollywood guys
[00:53:51] yeah should i be steve halk that's pretty cool
[00:53:55] change it as steve harvish steve halk what a stop what about this stop
[00:53:59] normal name to me and adam will go greek names okay
[00:54:02] yeah nikos mola noppolus sure yeah and and faggot bit stelios
[00:54:07] blue yeah pusty pusty which means faggot greek pusty bit stelios
[00:54:16] nikos mola malanapolus and pusty bit stelios
[00:54:22] pusty bit stelios greek that's your name bro
[00:54:27] that was the first thing my fucking aunt like i realized what what piece i thought
[00:54:31] all greek people were just horrible vulgar people uh and then i like met
[00:54:35] george's family and they're like nice just totally polite
[00:54:38] and then i went to my home yeah but his dad runs a halfway house for
[00:54:42] divorced men yeah yeah he's a men's right activist
[00:54:45] he's a nice guy but uh but i would go to my my
[00:54:49] who do my favorite thing about george's house was
[00:54:52] all the candy his dad had the he was stocked the fuck up there
[00:54:56] there was so much candy in that house yeah he gives those sad men candy he
[00:55:00] made me feel better nola bars like four different kinds of granola bars
[00:55:03] he got high and i ate like 19 twix it was awesome and then is that when we
[00:55:08] watched uh two straight buds yeah the best video on the internet have you
[00:55:14] ever seen two straight buds it's it's two straight buds blow uh
[00:55:20] dp a blow up doll yeah and these guys are like we're straight it's also it's
[00:55:24] like a clear blow up though well it starts with they each have their own blow up
[00:55:28] though and then and then they they share a traditional like
[00:55:32] yellow hard plastic blow up doll but then when they're getting very close to
[00:55:35] coming they get a very small clear blow up doll that they can look at each
[00:55:40] other's cars like a tiny woman yes and they're wearing like lugeot or
[00:55:43] masks the whole time and they're like high five they're like in the title of
[00:55:46] the videos two straight buds bdp a blow up doll
[00:55:51] fuck that is so good that's my favorite video it's like a wam city video
[00:55:55] huh it feels like it's been an allen yeah it's been an allen
[00:56:00] damn that would be awesome if they did that that's pretty x-rated for them
[00:56:05] they they did this thing where they did a bunch of they showed a lot of porn on
[00:56:09] their last tour yeah yeah shuts out wam city that's
[00:56:13] that's what comedy is going to evolve into is just pouring out with it dude
[00:56:16] porn is funny porn is funny i think it's despicable
[00:56:19] i think they i think they did something that was like
[00:56:23] bald guy is this bald guy like a fucking office manager or a porn star
[00:56:28] and then they would just show his head and then sometimes it would just be a
[00:56:31] regular bald guy like sometimes would be a bald guy getting his cocksucked
[00:56:34] pretty good bit yeah i think i'm butchering it but it's something to that idea
[00:56:38] Ben will tell me he'll listen to this a month later and then be like
[00:56:41] that's not what we did and then when adam does it next month it
[00:56:44] right our live show adam and veils his new bit
[00:56:50] pussy pussy but still apple is was it but still yes
[00:56:57] just tarnishing reputation public god damn it i'm
[00:57:03] man it's such a good name constantly uh you want something else dude
[00:57:13] bottom i'm gonna i'm gonna be stop mousti
[00:57:16] bottom cock love the other two two game one to go on
[00:57:21] impulse dude you got a fire from the hip with the
[00:57:23] it was it felt beautiful yeah that's good it felt
[00:57:26] at the start of the graph i have no natural athleticism but when it comes
[00:57:29] to hurting people's feelings you just sort of have to like you are
[00:57:33] yeah you have to glide through the world yeah
[00:57:34] not think about things you're right sometimes not even the best bit
[00:57:38] you just act mm-hmm yeah you're a natural
[00:57:42] yeah roaster being mean the people is important for the soul that's right
[00:57:46] dude we're bullies dude we we bully me and
[00:57:52] yeah i'm serious i have i feel like it hurts the quality of the show
[00:57:57] oh you know what you don't play along anymore now you just get your feelings
[00:58:00] hurt and it's like well i just can't get a bit out or a story or anything
[00:58:04] well that's not true we wanted you to finish that story about you
[00:58:07] you know your friends were sucking each other's dicks yeah i mean
[00:58:09] well first of all not being able to finish a sentence now you know how we
[00:58:13] feel yeah i'm literally do you know how many how many stories
[00:58:16] i leave on the shelf i've been talking about four different you just got a
[00:58:20] flow baby i'm bringing up later i flow too but it's just like
[00:58:37] world jama's auntie's not even i mean he's kind of a dick in the song
[00:58:40] the jeremy perspective of the guy singing the song
[00:58:44] well yeah he got blood all over those kids at school well no i mean not jeremy
[00:58:47] that the first person voiced in the song in there
[00:58:51] oh i don't know i've never listened to the song
[00:58:54] was jeremy ever listened i mean i've never
[00:58:56] intently listened to the lyrics so it's obviously been on yeah he says you know
[00:59:03] like the some i forget the lines exactly but
[00:59:06] he says that he also everyone used to bully jeremy he bullied him too until
[00:59:10] one day jeremy punched him oh respect yeah so he showed respect
[00:59:15] no so he was a coward that bully jeremy uh you know
[00:59:19] and the jeremy shot himself in front of the class damn
[00:59:22] and that's based on some kid at richards in high school in texas
[00:59:26] which is funny because it's like i guess i guess that was like a big story at
[00:59:31] the time i think it was yeah now i mean that's kind of only killed
[00:59:35] himself that whole story is kind of like a really good advertisement for teenage
[00:59:40] suicide because like what's the one thing you want as a teen more than anything
[00:59:44] ooh acknowledgement for many better girls yeah
[00:59:48] you want any better to acknowledge it you know if you're just what you
[00:59:53] maybe lose five ten pounds you know you're still kind of a factor with braces
[00:59:56] so i don't any better can fuck anybody why'd you
[00:59:59] get a fuck you you know uh-huh you really want to get in this good graces
[01:00:04] blow your fucking brains out in front of the english class
[01:00:07] then maybe there'll be a song called rachel
[01:00:10] and rachel rachel rachel later snacking class today
[01:00:16] what happened you know and then there's also adam song
[01:00:19] yeah yeah that's my that's my karaoke good too
[01:00:22] yeah yeah i'm getting out right no dude that's different
[01:00:28] but remember the time i spilled the cup of other people's jokes
[01:00:40] uh to that that yeah no that that's uh i miss you
[01:00:44] i miss you that's right do it with your time
[01:00:47] yeah adam song is the song about the gay guy who
[01:00:52] fucks man they killed himself yeah i was laughing about you know it was
[01:00:55] a blink when he saw two songs it's like uh
[01:00:58] may have even said this on the show already but like uh
[01:01:02] what's what's my age again is it yeah yeah
[01:01:05] but the limary goes uh what the hell is a DD my friend say i should act my age
[01:01:10] it's just you change it too what the hell is asperger is my friend
[01:01:14] said i should act my age and it puts the whole song in a different context
[01:01:20] which is much funnier and you know relevant
[01:01:22] yep for sure i like too in that song he's like
[01:01:26] you know oh people should actually act my age at 23 and it's like what being a
[01:01:30] famous band yeah i was like at 23 i was just driving
[01:01:35] drunk everywhere yeah 23 those were the cheeseburger years
[01:01:40] for me dude yeah those were the fucking couple entrees i was
[01:01:44] already a fail 23 i was like i was like midway through puberty at that point
[01:01:49] yeah what year what year is it now 17 i'm 28
[01:01:53] so that's five years ago yeah yeah i was not doing shit dude i was doing
[01:01:57] Dave chauffeur rooms yeah it's 2012 damn wow i just started comedy
[01:02:04] obama wow dude it's almost 2020 it's fucked up we're almost getting
[01:02:08] we're almost already 30 i'm 30 holy shit you're old and ugly
[01:02:13] and then you're gonna be 40 soon pretty seriously 40
[01:02:17] basically that's insane i'm on the wrong side of four life is life sucks i know
[01:02:21] dude we're just gonna keep getting older it just goes so fast yeah
[01:02:25] that's how we love we're gonna die bring it back to
[01:02:27] like you know the grandpa thing it's like that must like
[01:02:31] it must feel like you were fucking 65 like two weeks oh my god
[01:02:35] and now you're just gonna be dead yeah and all your friends like half your
[01:02:39] friends are just dead dude my grandparents my my grandma's like
[01:02:43] lifelong best friend they went to nursing school together in the 40s
[01:02:47] right that's how long ago they knew it yeah me and eldest baby is from
[01:02:50] fucking nursing school in the 40s no her best nursery school in nursing
[01:02:54] pre-k yeah no nursing nursing school nursing nursing
[01:02:58] okay gotcha and uh she was like they were
[01:03:03] her best friend was over at their house damn it grandma's old and uh
[01:03:07] she fucking uh she's like going upstairs to go up to the bathroom
[01:03:12] and she's like i'm just gonna go up to the bathroom and like
[01:03:15] misses reaching for the railing just goes backwards
[01:03:20] fucking splits her head of dead cool jesus fucking like
[01:03:25] you know she's in a coma for a couple of weeks the family was like mad at my
[01:03:29] grandparents you know because they were like
[01:03:30] blaming that yeah i don't know for being slippery stairs
[01:03:34] if we're leaving that banana peel it was this fucking whole thing but you just
[01:03:38] like watched her friend die in like from like a bullshit accident yeah yeah
[01:03:44] where like me as a resilient young man if that happened i'll be like
[01:03:47] fucking gay ass stairs yep you'd feed the fuck out of this
[01:03:50] stairs i would fucking cut family over everything
[01:03:52] punched through the stairs yep destroy them i would bounce back to death
[01:03:56] before dishonor you know uh but if you're old
[01:04:00] you can't bounce back dude that's it that's why i i want to die young to have
[01:04:03] the saddest funeral i just all your friends are still i want to live
[01:04:06] i want to live forever you think about that about who's gonna be like
[01:04:10] sad and who won't be sad when i died yeah if you died
[01:04:14] like today you know you never think about like
[01:04:18] maybe when i was more depressed like a girl that fucked you over like if she's
[01:04:21] gonna come with that funeral yeah when i'm depressed i feel that you think
[01:04:24] about is girls that fucked you over i wonder
[01:04:27] yeah like a weird girl like a spiteful shitty little person you know i mean
[01:04:31] i know it's called depression actually i get where you're talking about the
[01:04:34] rest of people think of you're a spiteful man i think you're
[01:04:37] closed off emotionally closed off uh yeah nik just thinks about his tools
[01:04:41] rusting about emotional intelligence no i don't i don't think about that
[01:04:46] when i think about when i think about death i immediately try to think about
[01:04:50] something else because i'm terrified i know you don't i know you don't have
[01:04:54] the rest i have that literally every time i every time i wake up from a nap
[01:04:59] i think oh one of them is not gonna wake up from this
[01:05:02] damn every single fucking time that's why every nap i take every nap i take i
[01:05:08] think about one day i'm just gonna fucking die i haven't thought about
[01:05:11] like dying quite some time i think because i'm
[01:05:13] happier now now i don't know how to now i feel weird because i i'm happy
[01:05:17] like i wake up i'm like oh i get to like nothing is bad today
[01:05:22] and it's weird and it makes me feel uncomfortable but when i'm depressed i
[01:05:25] think about dying constantly you know what i didn't think about it when i was
[01:05:28] fucking drunk all the time that's why i mean yeah i wish i could go back to
[01:05:33] that dude you can dude one day let's make a little more money
[01:05:37] let's get a tv show once i get once i get back in shape i'm going to turn into
[01:05:41] an alcoholic personal trainer and that's the dream
[01:05:45] be the screenplay that i don't write mhm
[01:05:48] the alcoholic personal trainer and one of his clients
[01:05:52] is uh i don't know so i'm dumb bitch yes there we go
[01:05:57] fuck there you were losing me but i'm back in that yeah
[01:06:00] and he can he he accidentally smashes his head
[01:06:05] in between the plates on the bowflex mission oh my god
[01:06:07] oh and then he can it's not clear what women are thinking
[01:06:14] awesome and it's i was thinking he could hear what the weights are saying yeah
[01:06:17] now he can talk about exercising with it yeah
[01:06:22] he's a man they could communicate with the barbell
[01:06:31] that'd be a good movie all right well i guess we should wrap this you're
[01:06:33] good about instead of what women want it's like what women
[01:06:36] come and then it's just a guy that could tell which women are
[01:06:40] cunts that's good and which aren't yeah i like
[01:06:43] after i saw that movie i wanted that power so bad i was like i
[01:06:47] know i was like a fat 12 year old here i was like fuck if i only
[01:06:52] knew what we want to have the the stop time fantasy in middle school
[01:06:56] oh yes yeah oh yeah but it wasn't even to like
[01:07:00] it was to like it wasn't to like molest it was to stop time and get a better
[01:07:05] view at like gert like to get a better mental picture to
[01:07:10] later beat off that was what a coward i was in my
[01:07:13] fucking fantasies it wasn't to get any other exam
[01:07:15] and the stop time thing in particular is such a weird
[01:07:18] that you had an ability to stop time and then you could just have sex with every
[01:07:22] girl in the classroom and then sit back in your chair
[01:07:25] and then restart time yeah yeah and then all of them are just like
[01:07:28] oh just a sudden something weird just not have happened to me
[01:07:33] and you're just sweaty and smiling yeah right and fucking three weeks older
[01:07:37] somehow yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
[01:07:40] yeah that is i wonder how time would work in the stop time do you age
[01:07:44] yeah of course you age wow yeah it's deep ship it's crazy you know times
[01:07:47] relative mmm like if you uh if you went up into space
[01:07:51] mm-hmm and you could like oh is that what was
[01:07:54] Matthew McConaughey's movie was yeah that's yeah sort of yeah that's what that was
[01:07:57] about not if you went up into space and you like
[01:08:02] flew close to the speed of light you're as close as you could get or whatever
[01:08:06] and came back to earth you would age less than other people
[01:08:10] whoa oh there was a movie there was like a movie where that happens to a
[01:08:15] little kid do you guys remember that one
[01:08:18] what's up fuck it like is that a source of stone or no yeah that was that was
[01:08:22] number five no there was a kid and he's like
[01:08:24] who's president reagan and it's like i don't know bush or something i don't
[01:08:29] know what the difference was yeah cool that's a cool movie sounds like a movie
[01:08:33] you know like you place video games in it or something there's a hot girl
[01:08:36] there's always in 80s movies with like a child protagonist there's always like a
[01:08:40] hot 25 year old woman that like wanted to fuck the kid
[01:08:44] yeah like blank check was like that sort of the basis for my like
[01:08:48] sexuality yeah well absolutely just the hot like also like babysitters and
[01:08:53] like just hoping a 25 year old would like suck my 12 year old little ass dick
[01:08:59] yeah fuck you would be molested yes the thing is like
[01:09:03] yes i swear to be molested i wanted to be molested
[01:09:06] yeah i still do every but that's how i love when they like fucking
[01:09:10] they parade out one of those hot teachers that fucked a 12 year old and we all
[01:09:14] have to pretend like that's a crime i know it's which i know it is a crime
[01:09:18] that's well-trad territory but it's fucking true yeah
[01:09:21] mary kalet turno is hot i think i think that the cut off is like i don't know
[01:09:26] 14 maybe that kid that she fucked was young i think you should be able to
[01:09:30] fuck a 14 year old boy i think he was 13 that
[01:09:32] samoan boy is she fucking yeah really weren't they married and now they got
[01:09:37] divorced it's a big bummer yeah dude love his love
[01:09:42] i thought love wins yeah yeah that's that's when i was
[01:09:46] you think Anthony we're in the 15 year old girl he was texting you're gonna get
[01:09:50] married when he gets out of return he's like wait for me and then everyone's
[01:09:53] gonna have to apologize for judging him for Tony you think he's actually gonna do
[01:09:56] time or is he just gonna help who is doing 15
[01:09:58] days what i hope huma has to apologize there's no like
[01:10:03] whuma they got back together right yeah they're back together she's gonna
[01:10:06] fucking go she's gonna like press her titties up against that glass
[01:10:10] uh humus a good looking lady between you know with the phone from jail
[01:10:15] yeah you guys get what i'm talking about yeah the
[01:10:17] divider the glass who way who is hot but there's no way she's cool right she's
[01:10:20] like halo ris best friend you got a fucking career tool you can't possibly
[01:10:23] be cool i bet she's a freak dude i bet that's why they got married
[01:10:26] oh yeah she eats ass you know huma eats ass oh of course
[01:10:30] no huma who gives that fucking rusty trombone to tony
[01:10:33] huma used to doms him that's your theory you've told me about this yeah yeah
[01:10:38] for sure she's his dom and he like gets off on sexual humiliation of course
[01:10:44] of course mmm interesting why do you think that why do you think uh
[01:10:47] a guy that looks very similar to you might have those kind of proclivities
[01:10:51] you do look a lot like Anthony wiener i appreciate that he's good
[01:11:01] wrong you don't have a six pack it's funny that you don't because you're like
[01:11:06] way nothing mm-hmm i don't do core exercises i don't
[01:11:10] say zero muscle mass on your frame it's not true
[01:11:12] it's i mean it is i have muscle mass what is that it's a muscle it's got a little
[01:11:17] muscle we're feeling that buys right now no that's a girl's bone no it's like
[01:11:21] it's a bone from a little girl there he is
[01:11:26] thanks brother thanks brother she's letting that pick up me slapping
[01:11:30] Adam's arm i'm gonna get that pump well we should
[01:11:33] probably wrap this up yep i think so i'm going to go on it i'm trying to think
[01:11:36] if there's anything we should review or if we should say something funny before
[01:11:40] the show ends probably not i'm tired um if you're in dc i think today
[01:11:45] no when is this drop tomorrow yeah next week me and Adam are going to be at
[01:11:49] fucking are we doing is next week yes oh damn next Wednesday at the dc draft
[01:11:54] house why am i not there i don't know martin booked
[01:11:57] booked us i'm headlining it martin only booked the two of you
[01:12:01] he wants to do a show there later i didn't i don't know adam was going to be on
[01:12:04] it he told he booked i saw martin in l.a. and he asked me if i wanted to do the
[01:12:07] show he booked me and he wants us to do a show there later so if he didn't his
[01:12:11] band from comtown he will never do this show if it's a
[01:12:15] fucking cool show we're talking about martin laurins by the way laurins asked
[01:12:19] do a show in dc you see more in laurins tell him get the step
[01:12:23] more in so we're the dc draft house um also i'm at
[01:12:26] mcguoby's joke house this weekend opening for dom mareira i think
[01:12:30] tommonium mareland mareland um so come if you want to get your titty
[01:12:34] sucked and uh what else uh i don't know man follow my little
[01:12:40] brother on instagram he's a very good painter
[01:12:42] adam's opening art by jodji adam's opening for so
[01:12:50] that's good yeah um yeah the only thing adam's opening
[01:12:55] this is my horse's asshole yeah for a man that's gone
[01:12:59] i think how could you possibly see that one coming you know i think we're on
[01:13:03] such a similar way of like now so chemistry we've
[01:13:06] built up over yeah that's 15 months of broadcast it's kind of like how that
[01:13:10] argentinian national team beat america because they've been playing together
[01:13:14] for so long the genobly team they got the gold basketball
[01:13:18] that's what we're like boys we've been riffing together for years all right
[01:13:21] let's go by the stupid fucking bicycle yeah all right but wait no hold on let's
[01:13:26] talk about that right here the show last night okay oh yeah that's kind of
[01:13:28] biker you're gonna get what would stop look good on maybe one of those ones
[01:13:32] the big wheel in the front where there's called no fuck that
[01:13:34] hey a penny uh penny farthing penny farthing yeah um no i'm
[01:13:40] gonna get a fucking uh a little hybrid my dude
[01:13:43] mhm well when it's fold up bikes no no just like
[01:13:45] no it's gonna be great road after surgically removed the seat from your ass
[01:13:50] i'm telling you man there's a reason nobody your size is ever seen on a
[01:13:54] bicycle that's all because they're bitch ass mother
[01:13:56] told me the doctor told you you couldn't oh no no i was
[01:14:00] see that's a story that got left on the shelf that i rolled
[01:14:03] when i was trying to when i was trying to buy a bike uh
[01:14:06] i went to a greek bike shop this is how fucking rude greek people are
[01:14:09] they he just looked at me he was like because of your uh
[01:14:13] weight i suggest a mountain bike i was like i'd like a road bike or a hybrid
[01:14:17] he was like no he wouldn't even show me a road bike he was like you
[01:14:20] would you get a mountain bike yeah yeah we were speaking greek too
[01:14:24] and he literally like tapped my stomach he was like because of your weight and then
[01:14:28] to make sure i got it he fucking hit my stomach a couple times i'd say you should
[01:14:32] get a steel frame you shouldn't get like an aluminum or an alloy frame because
[01:14:36] as first of all i i'm way like way less than you but i prefer a
[01:14:40] steel frame they'd like bikes get beat up in new york city a
[01:14:44] media steel frame yeah i get something that's like
[01:14:46] that's like uh yeah i do they could take a licking
[01:14:51] i just oh i know i know a little something i can take a look and pal
[01:14:54] my hot women's pussy that i you're pushing
[01:14:58] shout out to the women out there they want to get their they p eaten
[01:15:02] um yeah i don't know i'm gonna get a fucking bike i'm gonna be cruising
[01:15:05] i'm gonna be like i said next summer you're gonna see me no titties
[01:15:10] big arms big legs i'm gonna be fucking get my cock rubbed left
[01:15:13] oh wow breaking news saudi rayby is going to allow women to drive
[01:15:18] well that's a fucking we did it come down
[01:15:22] once again once again real results in the real world from that twitter poll i
[01:15:28] did said should women be allowed to drive yep
[01:15:32] they also seen it and the imams saw it yeah so step one
[01:15:37] get those saudi women driving step two nipple piercings oh yeah you know
[01:15:41] we need to look quality absolutely one thing behind the wheel and pierce
[01:15:45] stop pierce stop get those get a fucking little let's get some
[01:15:47] henna tattoo directly on the pussy you know i'm saying we'll ocean city
[01:15:51] magic yes yes get those girls you get a pussies wax
[01:15:55] a little bit of have you ever seen a yatted up pussy um
[01:15:58] what in real life mmm ira no no i don't do so
[01:16:02] a tattooed pussy yes no neither of them just ask a couple of pierced ones but
[01:16:06] never never attached it's not sure you've seen pierced
[01:16:09] uh clitoris but yeah they don't pierce the clitoris they pierce the hood