Search Directory About

Ep. 90 - Bug Audio

Cum Town | Regular | 02/15/2018

[00:00:00] Okay, we're gonna and this is the final attempt of using the computer
[00:00:09] Yeah, I should close them because the battery is probably gonna die now I take a look at it damn
[00:00:14] Do you have the two let me force I should do that I
[00:00:19] Should plug in the power plug any inside my dick plug any inside my dick
[00:00:24] Oh, this is cool. So this splitter I got mm-hmm that
[00:00:30] Apple advertises they charge $70 for this just to have two ports
[00:00:35] Yeah, yeah, because it was a good idea to only have the one USB
[00:00:39] Because that's the future, you know, it's like let's simplify things and now you need a million fucking adapters
[00:00:44] Yeah, so this one that's regular USB HDMI and then the USB C apparently that's not USB C
[00:00:51] Get the fuck out of here. It's like only a charge thing cuz it's yeah
[00:00:55] It's not gonna mount that so it's $70 for a fucking USB splitter
[00:00:58] You should have gotten the shit off Amazon baby the non the Apple official Apple is such a fucking garbage company
[00:01:04] Dude, no, but you can't have green bubbles, man. We've talked about it. I would love to fuck
[00:01:09] But also I feel that computers are pretty good
[00:01:11] They last my fucking my max always this this Mac book completely died within 10 months of having I've had my
[00:01:18] You're bad and your whole logic would replace that's all that's all your bad and all of his like risky risky
[00:01:26] pornography
[00:01:27] all the dangerous
[00:01:30] Websites I go to buy stops birthday presents. Oh, no fuck I
[00:01:35] Can't wait dude, you guys buy me dick. I literally saw it today. Oh, no, what is it?
[00:01:42] I'm so excited. I didn't want it off the Silk Road. I didn't want I didn't want to tell I didn't want to tell
[00:01:51] I've been yeah, I keep it secret for like a week. I damn it. It's too funny. Every time I
[00:01:58] Maranada carolines. I forget about it. Then I think about it again. It makes me laugh
[00:02:02] Fuck dude, I'm so stoked
[00:02:04] Yeah, we'll find out but not you broke motherfuckers if you didn't get tickets because the shit sold out
[00:02:13] Yeah, thank you to everyone fucking bought tikki's
[00:02:16] We're gonna get buck wild, you know, I think it was Nick's going buck angel
[00:02:20] We're gonna get bucking world and get our cocks chopped off. We're gonna get pussy's
[00:02:24] But we're gonna still look like men. Yeah, it's a favorite
[00:02:27] Handlebar mustaches tribal tattoos. Oh, yeah big hard cocks or pussies big wet pussies. It's gonna be awesome, man
[00:02:35] That'd be pretty cool. I can't wait to have a pussy
[00:02:38] Be cool to be friends with Buck Angel. Okay, Joel's band is pretty good, too
[00:02:42] What kind of a bucks you
[00:02:46] Your crazy bitch, but you look so good when you fuck my pussy
[00:02:49] I dream doing you all night with you had a dick, but I still have a bunch of
[00:02:57] But cherries the worst band it's unbelievable. It's a good
[00:03:01] Worst band of all time. Yeah, yeah, I think there's a fucking worst band in buck chair
[00:03:06] They should get all the pre hate for 100%
[00:03:08] Don't you even attempt to disagree with me Adam Adam are you saying or I will put you right back?
[00:03:13] No, I only know the crazy bitch song, but it's not very good
[00:03:15] What other songs do they have yeah, don't don't get out of line, man
[00:03:20] You're going right back to that girl voice you got you're putting me right back on that all the Kings of Leon songs for starters
[00:03:30] These are all originally buck cherry songs
[00:03:34] That's so funny that they read that is a lyric in a popular song
[00:03:39] Dude, it's like when it 11
[00:03:41] 11
[00:03:44] Have you ever seen you know those shreds videos?
[00:03:48] Have you ever seen the Kings of Leon one? It's probably the best one there like glass and berry festival or something?
[00:03:54] What are these videos?
[00:03:55] They're they're like they re-edit or you dub someone and it looks and it sounds like shit
[00:04:01] Yeah, it sounds like the Van Halen jump one is also very the van halen's pretty well as welcome come in your pants
[00:04:07] Because you have a small
[00:04:11] Come in your jeans you're gay and you saw man's ass all right
[00:04:18] Well, that's great, but we got a lot of stuff to cover today
[00:04:21] We got a lot of times days I own valentine's day
[00:04:26] No, it's gallon time. That's no valentine's day. It's just 20 minutes later
[00:04:31] Ladies, how about we go Dutch?
[00:04:41] And you pay with your part with the coupon how do we go dud you about a 50% off
[00:04:49] That's a form of pain
[00:04:51] I paid half with the coupon bitch. I went to community college for marketing. Don't fucking come and we would that shit
[00:05:02] Go ahead and suck I love destroying women with logic now times they baby a little destroyed with logic
[00:05:10] Shut up dude. I have a cold right now. Yes. I know I always I know I always say all night gaming. I know
[00:05:18] You're gaming addiction you made fun of me for gaming you play one video game and now you can't get your dick
[00:05:24] It really is I forgot my eating I forgot to jack off for three days and tacky's oh
[00:05:31] Did you get tacky's I did not get
[00:05:36] It's a libertarian snack. Yeah, it's like it's like big cheetos is
[00:05:41] Really isn't it Hispanic it's like tacky's leg. Yeah, it's a gap by the handicaps
[00:05:47] No, that's different handicaps hot fries
[00:05:49] I thought tacky's was like fucking Hispanic shit like because they probably don't look in the creek dude
[00:05:55] No, doc. He's a guy's name. Yeah, no, it's a Greek. Yeah, I had an uncle tacky the otaki
[00:06:02] That's a good name actually tacky tacky like tacky a shit. No
[00:06:07] Yeah, like kostaki. I love to talk to little kids on the internet
[00:06:15] I was laughing about like that and if Shane Vader if resident pet
[00:06:21] He's listening. He's come on don't be mean. I'm not being mean. I'm describing him continue
[00:06:27] She chooses to identify which is as a trans pet of
[00:06:41] The pronoun is she but you have to say she with a bunch of like saliva at the front of your mouth
[00:06:46] She because you're just thinking about those kids
[00:06:51] My preferred pronoun
[00:06:53] Gee
[00:06:55] Anyway, what about anyways? Yeah, so it the the
[00:06:59] Manifesto typing scene from Jerry Maguire, right you strip the Vio output the the background music back in and then interspersed with shots of like
[00:07:09] You know decoy. Can you bring right?
[00:07:13] Like sweating and typing that's good stuff
[00:07:17] And then it just ends real quick with him like bursting into the office with the paper and her cheering
[00:07:29] Yeah, and then if you want to get a couple of the ends with the beep in there also always classic
[00:07:35] What he's talking to Cuba good
[00:07:37] Good genius is some ridiculous. Oh, yeah, actually the hello Newman thing works with any movie where there's somebody says a word that starts
[00:07:47] Then and literally any word. Yeah, and I would work a lot better
[00:07:53] Ninkum poop with the nightmare before Christmas
[00:08:04] What else
[00:08:06] Ninh
[00:08:07] Teenage me in the digital that's good
[00:08:11] It does sound like
[00:08:14] That actually probably was a favorite of yeah
[00:08:17] Young racist everywhere. Yeah, I'm really like the end apostrophe apostrophe apostrophe or
[00:08:24] actress yeah before Christmas and then it's Jack Skeleton goes into the Kwanza tree
[00:08:30] Oh, did they have a tree? Yeah, that's a black manora. Yeah, well they have a tree too. They combined Christmas in
[00:08:42] I want to go to a Kwanzaa celebration. Yeah, I want to go to Australia
[00:08:47] Do you go to Australia? I don't why not dude. Let's go. I don't know. I watch that Simpson's episode
[00:08:54] I watched that Simpson's episode Bart versus Australia
[00:08:57] That's a great episode man, and you know I've seen that fucking
[00:09:02] All right, might you win? I say you've played not if he's spooning before I've seen that joke
[00:09:09] Hundreds of thousands of times in the last 20 years every fucking time I was laughing about it for a day so good
[00:09:15] Yeah, it's so funny. Yeah, when Homer gets the toilet to go by you win
[00:09:19] So you've played not if he's spooning before
[00:09:21] Bro we should go. Yeah, you know the he can't go roomy
[00:09:27] I think I brought this up before and I'll see you my mind. Yeah, I'll sure I get it's a big-ass bird
[00:09:33] It's a big chicken but kangaroo is like yeah giant chicken, but it can't go rules like I don't know kind of that's their national symbol
[00:09:39] Yeah, I can't use like a dog in a horse. It's like yeah, right?
[00:09:43] Wouldn't you say it's also like what they identify as like their best animal? No, it's like a deer mixed with a rat
[00:09:49] Yes a big rat. It's a joke. Why would you want to eat that shit? Yeah, it's jumpy like a deer
[00:09:55] Yeah, it is rat like kind of also kind of like a monkey because it's muscular monkey
[00:10:01] It's like monkeys can climb good. It's more jumpy. It's like a rabbit. It's like a rabbit rat rabbit rat
[00:10:07] rabbit rat
[00:10:09] Rat your giant giant rabbit rat here. Yes
[00:10:12] Yes with a pouch. Yeah. Oh the pouch is big to a pouch you got ears
[00:10:17] Referring there's definitely one guy that's listening to that. He's like what the fuck was that?
[00:10:22] I would be interested to see where they evolved from they there's my super inside the pouch. Oh shit
[00:10:28] That's good. It's wet. You can fuck it. Yeah, let's hold down a kangaroo and fuck its
[00:10:34] I'm gonna open the pouch and just pour gallons of LSD in there
[00:10:39] The kangaroo kills itself jumps off a fucking big-ass clip becomes even cooler be tight put on a tie-dye shirt
[00:10:46] Yeah, did you see that movie is coming up with Ben and Jerry's flavors?
[00:10:52] That's not the Ben and Jerry what movie can't read Jack this uh, I saw can't grew Jack me off
[00:11:00] Did you ever see the movie Anthony Anderson Jack me off?
[00:11:04] It's really good. You know Hawaiian shirt can't grew Jack was really good. No, it's not very good
[00:11:09] But it's good to watch when you're stunned. I
[00:11:11] I watched a boy movie. What's kangaroo Jack is this another one of those Jack Black movies for children?
[00:11:17] Yeah, it's him as a kangaroo man
[00:11:19] You weren't like I mean this show aside you want to talk about things that requires zero talent and have weight
[00:11:26] Jack Black what a fucking career in like he's been in like two good movies. What are they?
[00:11:32] Saving silver savings over minutes
[00:11:35] Yeah, and then
[00:11:37] Good
[00:11:39] Nied in C school around pretty good. It's heartwarming the record store
[00:11:44] He was not in the English yes, he is yeah, he's the patient. He's the doctor
[00:11:50] No, he's not yes. He is
[00:11:51] Jack was a power of laughter. Yeah, Jack
[00:11:55] Adam's this is a patch Adam's he does what happens to patch Adams like they trust the guy and he like rapes patch Adam
[00:12:00] Yeah, it's the patch Adam's about a guy that like fakes his way into medical school. It's sad as shit
[00:12:06] And then yeah, it is really sad and then some weird guy in his wife's like I don't know about this guy in patch
[00:12:10] Like no, that's all chill and then he like kills her I think in rapes her which is yeah patch Adams kills in rape
[00:12:18] Robert it turns out patch Adams was
[00:12:22] Snatch Adams. He's like all right. What are you sick for?
[00:12:25] Don't be sick you fucking idiot. You fucking slag. What are you five?
[00:12:30] You're gonna fucking crawl because you got can't say you little fucking faggot. We know from I'm from East
[00:12:38] Third Show Mike. Yeah, I'm from Third Chester
[00:12:43] It's downtown London the worst fucking place in the fucking world
[00:12:50] Just because you go fucking leukemia you little bitch you got act like a fucking bitch because you got leukemia
[00:12:57] Yeah, I'm snap
[00:13:04] Thank you do mate all right
[00:13:12] It's time for tea
[00:13:15] African enough Adam do not fucking deconstruct the bit while we are
[00:13:21] Not what we are in Riff City just trying to win a high team in Riff City
[00:13:25] It sounds like you saw the African boys shut the fuck up. I'm sorry Mike
[00:13:33] Call him gay snitch
[00:13:36] You get him snitch
[00:13:38] How about yeah, how about
[00:13:42] Hatch at it. What's the woman a crash crash Adam not crash Adam? What's the will Smith movie hitch Adam's Adams? Yeah?
[00:13:49] There you go, that's good. It's like a Kevin James. I'm a let me tell you how to fuck how about
[00:14:01] Smith you listen to the Adam freeland impression of
[00:14:10] Y'all motherfucker seen independence
[00:14:12] I got time for no damn aliens
[00:14:25] And you're so good
[00:14:30] My impressions will come out one of these days, no, maybe not this episode
[00:14:35] Yep, I was thinking that same thing fucking raccoon
[00:14:39] Dude that's good at Adam free land. It's like I'm sick
[00:14:52] They're like what the fuck is wrong with this man giggling like an imbecile that's sick child
[00:14:58] You good movie
[00:15:07] Giggling bitch
[00:15:11] Getting beaten up by kids with cancer
[00:15:15] Speaking of beating up kids dude, I mean I told you guys are running a good
[00:15:20] Flatbush yesterday, and I'm buying a hat off some guy on the street very nice as I do
[00:15:25] I gotta go out conduct my business by street hats
[00:15:28] And then I fucking like right behind me
[00:15:30] I hear a thud and I turn all these black kids are yelling and there's this fucking like maybe
[00:15:36] 11 year old girl being thrown to the ground. It was a girl. Yeah, and
[00:15:42] It looks like a grown man's throne or there's all these kids swarming and I'm like I don't know
[00:15:46] It's not my fucking business
[00:15:48] So you know I keep walking in these two black guys are watching and one of them says the other one like
[00:15:53] Man that will me I would have killed that kid
[00:15:58] So glad I didn't say anything that's obviously that grown man was in the right. Yeah, of course
[00:16:03] Yeah, they kid probably you know spit on his shiny shoes
[00:16:07] No, what I imagine happened from looking at it and said like that guy was walking his daughter home
[00:16:12] And then some other girl who's like a bully probably did something to daughter
[00:16:16] And then he beat the girl to the ground which is like don't do that, but you know
[00:16:22] She like yeah look like he was trying to break up a fight or whatever
[00:16:25] Okay, all right. I give him I thought he was just wailing on a I thought he was just beating a child
[00:16:29] I don't know. I mean I'm trying to deduce based on like no one
[00:16:33] Intervening or whatever. Yeah, so I guess the girl deserved it or it could just be you know good old
[00:16:38] Fashion, you know what maybe think twice before you get into that me too stuff, you know
[00:16:43] You don't know what these as the clear lesson from that maybe there maybe they're the bullies
[00:16:51] Mm-hmm. Yeah, that's really sad though to see just in the middle of the day. Yeah, you saw some pretty hilarious
[00:16:58] I saw yeah, I saw mom. It was like late at night on the train about fat Chatham's and its Margaret Thatcher
[00:17:05] Yeah, that's good time of dumb beach
[00:17:07] I'm going to sign characters from the phone to bomb the Falkland
[00:17:12] I'm from turdshaw Mike
[00:17:17] The toughest night boot in downtown London in London tone
[00:17:23] Fuck yeah, I would love to I want to go over to England and marry me like a fucking
[00:17:29] Monestics yeah, I think British person. Oh like like an Indian
[00:17:34] Witch up like Ribbian British one. Yeah, yeah
[00:17:37] Like that one we met there was a model. Yeah, I'm a model. I'm a model
[00:17:41] Yeah, when Nick and I were like out of Mike once this girl's like really she's like what do you do?
[00:17:45] We're like oh, we're both unemployed
[00:17:48] You should just see mother wing. That's what I do. I'm a model. I'm a model
[00:17:53] I live in Brie
[00:17:53] Send him a model. I'm a little bricks and model
[00:17:58] How are you boy if you're a model from Brixton and you want to get your ship in a minute?
[00:18:02] I used to have a really big crush on the MIA
[00:18:05] I used to think it's really hot of course
[00:18:09] That's a pretty standard little hip you know
[00:18:12] Is missing and yeah, it's maybe Indian
[00:18:22] You know why they call it a Larry the cable guy
[00:18:24] That's not bad. Yeah, you all listen to the MIA girl. Well, I was her name stand for maybe Indian
[00:18:32] I don't know you're done
[00:18:35] You tell them Larry
[00:18:39] Tells you like it is how about that folks snatch Adam
[00:18:44] Boy talking about where's where's the glory?
[00:18:48] Throw another shrimp
[00:18:50] Dan Whitney what's a lorry?
[00:18:56] Cab it's a truck or a truck. Yeah, yeah, I'm a cab
[00:19:00] Fucking in the water the cab's called there called cabs round it round
[00:19:11] Really good
[00:19:13] Going there just calling the wrong things back
[00:19:16] What do you bags up to?
[00:19:18] English
[00:19:24] I thought that's what you know, I who's that fact like the queen
[00:19:30] Yeah, that's what you call her a fag
[00:19:37] She's called the queen
[00:19:41] I thought she was called a fag
[00:19:43] That's
[00:19:47] That's awesome
[00:19:55] Fags and fags
[00:19:57] Just for us. Yeah
[00:19:59] This is like when we did that greatest riff all time. Oh, yeah, yeah, no one thought was
[00:20:05] That's the funniest thing we were at target for like two hours afterwards me and Nick just laughing about that
[00:20:12] Yeah, I just forget it ladies gentlemen the president has authorized use of the gayest bomb of all time
[00:20:19] I'm sorry. Excuse me. It's the mother of all bombs
[00:20:24] I'm sorry. I would like to issue a correction earlier. I miss I misstated in between denying the Holocaust
[00:20:34] Spicy you guys ice he was great. Yeah, now we got fucking
[00:20:39] That fucking bitch. Yeah, Mike Huckabee son Sarah Huckabee's yeah
[00:20:46] Like yeah, it's Mike Huckabee son
[00:20:50] That that fact in the British sense. You know you said it the slur away. No, I said it the British was using
[00:21:00] Slurrs on the show look who's using slurrs. That's a book. I'm gonna write for my son when he's born. Yes look who's using slurs
[00:21:07] It's just drawings. I've done of Elmo and Grover saying all the different racial all the good ones
[00:21:15] Yeah, there's the book called there's a racial slur at the end of this book and Grover's like wait
[00:21:20] You find out what the racial slur is
[00:21:23] And then he gets the end and it's cookie monster calling it the n-word. It's like it's you Grover
[00:21:29] You were the slur this whole time
[00:21:31] That's deep bro. Yeah, cuz by wanting to hear slurs you become the n-word. Yeah
[00:21:39] So I'm gonna get into children's books. There's like naughty children's books. They sell at urban outfit. All right. Yeah, they're the fuck to sleep
[00:21:46] That's the big one. Yeah, that was the first one. I believe yeah narrated by Samuel L Jackson
[00:21:51] I had I never gonna do it, but I wrote I wrote it and I was gonna get an illustrator to do uh
[00:21:56] The little engine that had rich parents. Oh, yeah, I remember that
[00:22:00] You can probably do it. Yeah, that's a lot of fucking work. Whatever dude. You know, it's like that's like 12 drawings
[00:22:07] That's not that work. That's at least a fucking week of
[00:22:11] Of solid work. Yeah, dude. I'm sell it now man. I'm like I gotta do like maybe two hours of work
[00:22:16] I'll put a little bit disc golf, you know
[00:22:19] Have a shot at your disc golf right now
[00:22:25] That's a shit you're into now
[00:22:27] Yeah, that means going to the bathroom, right? Yeah
[00:22:31] A bunch of mail
[00:22:33] You go in the spits and then you just
[00:22:38] Better in here
[00:22:43] Like what have you done like that you called it that motherfucker
[00:22:47] Yeah, I'm taking a nice much thought that's what you were supposed to do air would just be fucking heavy with
[00:22:52] particles
[00:23:02] Why would they make the name so close to just say it yeah, just taking a shit on the coals
[00:23:08] Steaming hot coals here
[00:23:10] Get a little more shit steamed
[00:23:13] The colds. I'm just trying to make it steam a little bit more. Oh my god
[00:23:17] I'm thinking a nice team
[00:23:19] Bigger nice steaming on the cold. Yeah, fuck. Yeah, not my go for a little hot air balloon ride. Yeah
[00:23:26] Take a shit
[00:23:28] in the little
[00:23:31] This episode is for us
[00:23:33] If I can rent the hot air balloon you should go back straight
[00:23:37] Thanks
[00:23:45] Yeah, this is a terrible
[00:23:50] Sounds great
[00:23:52] That high up overlooking like a one of you. Yeah, what a view that you got to take it all in yeah
[00:23:59] It'd be great to just you jack off off a hot air balloon and some guys walking to work
[00:24:04] He's like oh great a bird shit on me bird shit into my mouth
[00:24:10] That's somebody's like, you know, that's good luck
[00:24:12] That's like a joke from airplane or something like that level of comedy. Yeah, you mean high higher level
[00:24:19] I love airplane. Don't you ever try to disrespect it's a great movie
[00:24:22] Especially like the scene where women's lining up to beat that woman
[00:24:25] Get a hold of yourself. I used to love that
[00:24:32] That was like one of the movies that kids watch is a very young child that just had complete tits in it
[00:24:37] Absolutely. Yeah, and it was like why am I allowed to because it's like stupid right right yeah porkies was too
[00:24:42] No porkies was straight up about like yeah beating and women's locker. Yeah. Yeah, I saw that when I was like six
[00:24:49] And everyone got oh everyone they got a whore and they all fucked her right something like that
[00:24:54] Yeah, I haven't ever seen porkies, but um yeah major plot points
[00:24:58] Yeah, it had a whole like staring at women in the shower thing and you like to do that you pervert
[00:25:04] I'm I'm actually me doing porkies the movie right now. Why?
[00:25:08] Because it's disrespectful
[00:25:10] Place in the 50s. Yeah, porkies is what it's a bar right? It's like they're hanging out. Yeah. Oh nice
[00:25:17] Or like it's like the max or something
[00:25:19] I remember the box for porkies in blockbuster as a kid. I remember thinking like man if I could be that guy
[00:25:27] That guy is so cool through that hole
[00:25:32] Oh fuck do I could be a horny voyeur
[00:25:36] I don't want I don't get when people like watching other people fuck
[00:25:40] Really? I want to get in the mix man. I don't want to watch some other guy
[00:25:43] Oh, you're saying like like in a cuck holding scene like you don't want to be the sweater and dockers guys
[00:25:48] Just well. Yeah that for sure, but also just like I don't understand voyeurism. I guess
[00:25:53] I want to because it's not
[00:25:55] Be in the mix probably some shit from childhood, right? You saw your parents fucking or something. Yeah, fuck you
[00:26:01] Let me see your parents join
[00:26:02] You know what's about voyeurism? Yeah, of course
[00:26:05] Does stuff stop?
[00:26:06] My parents let me show it's not his parents
[00:26:07] She's to have sex and his mom would take stops round body and wedge him under her hips to pop them up higher
[00:26:13] Oh, yeah, dad could get what's that thing? They're real deep spots
[00:26:17] They advertise the bowling ball stop the liberator of dunder his mom's ass
[00:26:22] I'm like wait. I didn't want a snack. I want to have a snack. Shut up. We're pounding
[00:26:31] Mommy and daddy are pounding right again. They're pound off my parents fucking saw mom's getting railed out
[00:26:38] Um, yeah, that was that thing that they advertised in the back of porno mags the liberator
[00:26:43] Which is like that triangular foam thing that it would put her ass up on so yeah
[00:26:49] Yeah, you can hit all the other back walls
[00:26:51] No, but if you put a pillow under a girl like while you're having a regular one seems like it
[00:26:56] It seems like it would be really nice
[00:26:58] You know what? I'm gonna write a letter to the Casper mattress company and so they make one rig me up one
[00:27:03] Have you ever used what's the weirdest like sexual?
[00:27:06] A kutraman you've gotten in the mix. I know I put a gun in a girl's ass
[00:27:10] Is that real? Yeah
[00:27:14] I mean
[00:27:17] Right in there bump stock would not be surprised if you literally put a gun in a woman's ass just drunk as shit
[00:27:25] No, I've never done that. That's so scary. Is it rimming the sopranos? She would jannies
[00:27:31] Would you fucking well? What's the question weirdest sex a kutraman like a toy or a life count?
[00:27:36] I guess I mean I've done a lot of pissed stuff in my life really a lot. Yeah. Yeah, just drunk
[00:27:43] No, and you know, it's not even really something that I mean wanted
[00:27:46] Yeah, you just keep drawing women that want to be pissed on what no this time's Robin
[00:27:50] It attracted it, but sure which you know
[00:27:52] It's funny because like and I think I've said it before the nicest part about it is like it's just really nice to be able to go to the bathroom
[00:27:59] You
[00:28:04] Get your dick
[00:28:12] It's just really nice
[00:28:15] Yeah, it's like being an astronaut. I'm focused on the mission. I don't have to worry about going to the bathroom
[00:28:20] Yeah, there was well, I've never pissed on anyone, but I'd be open to it
[00:28:31] Um I have
[00:28:33] How did you feel about it? I remember you were also tying bitches up you guys. It's funny because I have that one girl
[00:28:38] You're probably the horniest on the show, but me and Adam have had a lot more sex than you and we've done a lot
[00:28:43] We've done a lot more shit. No, I fuck a lot
[00:28:45] You know, it's a character that I do the guy who doesn't fuck
[00:28:48] No, you're like the you're like the guy that didn't say smoking weed until he was 22 and he's like fucking pink Floyd
[00:28:58] You guys try have you ever heard of the doors
[00:29:02] Someone told me that what is this?
[00:29:04] Someone told me Doug Benson didn't try weed until he was like 39
[00:29:09] Well, Doug Benson's old as shit dude. He's like a lot of people know he's like in his like mid 70s
[00:29:14] Yeah, he was really old. I'm escomote brothers with him
[00:29:17] Apparently that video that you both pissed each other's mouth
[00:29:21] But one of the women you pissed yes
[00:29:24] Of course
[00:29:26] The one that fucks Doug Benson gets piss in her mouth
[00:29:30] Yeah, we're getting stoned
[00:29:33] Um
[00:29:34] Yeah, what was what were we saying before that? Oh the sex thing. Oh, yeah
[00:29:38] You're using ropes and shit. Oh, yeah that one girl wanted me to do all that like
[00:29:42] Obby rape stuff the pericord girl. Yeah, you basically can't fuck her unless you were a boy scout
[00:29:56] That was the same girl who was like yeah, my ex boyfriend was a real sex nerd
[00:30:00] And I was like I need to I need to leave right now a sex nerd
[00:30:04] Yeah, because he like he had a lot of he had like a library of sex books
[00:30:08] Like about like fucking about a fucker. So I'm just trying to get this not arena off
[00:30:13] That's fucking stupid. That is like it's quite literally the gayest thing
[00:30:18] I'm like I don't even get my dick hard anymore. Yep. I'm done. I'm post-heart. I just
[00:30:23] I just you know what because honestly that makes it harder to piss
[00:30:29] That's fucking true what you want to get that the just tiny little bit of cum or
[00:30:35] Just six hours of pounding Dunkin Donuts coffee worth your
[00:30:43] Quantity not quality leaders of your dark yellow brown
[00:30:50] Syrup
[00:31:00] Batter's just destroyed you're like you're welcome
[00:31:03] You know
[00:31:18] My man stuck around
[00:31:24] She got shit on his balls. I don't I didn't think you missed him
[00:31:28] I don't know she was on the bottom. She poops. I don't know the exact it. Listen
[00:31:32] He probably got shit on his balls that he didn't tell me because he didn't tell me till months after
[00:31:38] And he's probably not gonna be thrilled that I told
[00:31:47] Just hit the fucking shower
[00:31:52] Stay in the mix what a legend L. Just I
[00:31:54] Wouldn't shit stuff seems wild the people that shit on each other sexually. I'm not into that at all
[00:32:01] Scott play. Yeah, that's weird. There was this girl. I hooked up with when I was like 15 or 16 and
[00:32:08] I can't even really know where that was. She just like lived in my neighborhood
[00:32:11] Yeah, and like that used to be enough. It was like oh, we live in the same neighborhood right right right right
[00:32:16] She's like just have sex or your dad's gone
[00:32:19] and
[00:32:20] She was like Filipina and she fucking uh, yeah
[00:32:25] We were like hooking up and she's like talking about she's like yeah
[00:32:26] My friend went to the Philippines and like she hooked up with this guy and he like asked her to like shit on his chest
[00:32:32] But he said it in like whatever, you know tag along. Yeah. Yeah, whatever their language is
[00:32:37] Tangle on she's like and it sounded like really hot but like in that language
[00:32:40] And it's like you know when she told me that because I wouldn't be into that but like the way she described
[00:32:45] She's like talking about it and I got it. How old are you like 13?
[00:32:49] No, I was like 15 or 16 and I didn't put it together till later that she was implying that she wanted to get
[00:32:56] Yeah, she wanted to shit it on
[00:32:58] Did she want to get shit on and she want to shit on you?
[00:33:01] First of all neither that's happening. Would you would you squat?
[00:33:05] No, I'm not no that seems horrible first of all. I'd have to be checking my phone
[00:33:10] I don't like doing any ass eating stuff. I mean, I'll do it if someone's into it
[00:33:14] But I'm like I don't like I don't like getting my ass. I've had an ass
[00:33:19] Revival recently. Yeah
[00:33:29] No, I was like I was kind of put off by
[00:33:32] The concept of anal sex until like the last couple of years. I'm in the ass makes big time
[00:33:37] We gotta take a break real quick
[00:33:39] We gotta do the god damn it dude the fucking
[00:33:42] Apple
[00:33:44] Mail app just got you fucked up every okay. Here we go taking a break
[00:33:49] Uh, and you know what? We're just gonna we're gonna just roll right into it guys. Oh, dude
[00:33:54] I'm shut the fuck up. He's coming on. God damn it dude
[00:33:58] If you don't want to listen to Adam
[00:34:00] I'll say it out if you're enjoying all this sex talk maybe take your pants off
[00:34:05] Mmm throw out whatever underwear you pick up a pair of mac weldon underwear from mac weldon.com
[00:34:12] Mac weldon is the best underwear in the entire world
[00:34:14] Oh, yeah
[00:34:15] They believe in smart design premium fabrics and simple shopping go online to their online store
[00:34:21] Which uh, we don't even have you know, that's how hard it is to set up is that I haven't paid a guy to do it yet
[00:34:26] Yes, so mac weldon has it's a very easy website to navigate and they got great products
[00:34:31] Uh, they got the most comfortable underwear socks shirts undershirts undershirts hoodies and sweatpants that you'll ever wear
[00:34:38] And they got a line of silver underwear and shirts that are naturally anti-microbial
[00:34:42] Which means they eliminate odor. I personally don't smell so you know, I mean I imagine imagine smelling like me all the time
[00:34:51] Uh, just very clean individual. No, they want you to be comfortable
[00:34:55] So if you don't like your first pair of underwear, you can go ahead and keep them and they'll still refund your money
[00:34:59] No questions. That's that's a pretty great policy a lot of places you just try the underwear on and they call the police on that's right
[00:35:06] Me and modell
[00:35:08] Yeah, i'm standing there in the middle of the nikey rack. Uh-huh squaring up with the mannequin
[00:35:12] Because i was impression full erection
[00:35:16] And they called the police on me can't believe that uh, and not only do mac weldon's underwear look good socks shirts
[00:35:22] They perform well too. Um, they're great for working out. You can wear them to the gym. You can go out on dates with them
[00:35:27] Uh, you look good both flaccid and direct and in the order and trust me i've tried this out
[00:35:32] I brought a pair of mac weldon underwear to that same modell
[00:35:36] To see if i would get arrested wearing it the answer is yes, so i can't promise that you won't be
[00:35:41] Arrested multiple times for getting a full erection
[00:35:45] In the middle of the motels motels in downtown brooklyn, but uh, you can go to macweldon.com and get 20
[00:35:52] Percent off using promo code comptown cum to wn all capital letters check him out
[00:35:58] Macwell dot com and we're back we're back, baby
[00:36:01] That is a really sad models by the way downtown brooklyn models. Yeah two story models. They never have oh is it two stories
[00:36:09] There's a second story. Oh you're talking about the near the full mall. I'm talking about by full mall. I'm talking about the atlantic barclays
[00:36:14] Oh, okay. Yeah, which is also shitty. It's big as fuck, but they never have any of the stuff i like right i went there to get some gloves
[00:36:20] And they didn't have yeah, yeah that that that Atlantic barclays whole shopping centers
[00:36:25] The other thing i hate about motels is the only they only have like nine excel sizes because everybody
[00:36:30] They never restocked the the normal people sizes, right? It's like it's fucking athletic wear right why do you have fat people sizes?
[00:36:38] Uh fat people are athletes too. No
[00:36:41] Some fat people are natural. I'm sorry being wedged under your mother's ass so she can get people she can get pounded out
[00:36:46] Incredibly strong. Yes. I had the core strength that is not my full grown mother
[00:36:51] That's a baby athlete more like apple core strength. Oh
[00:36:56] Apple shit. Yeah, you're wrecked. Yeah. No blowing the phone out. You're a fucking idiot
[00:37:04] Guys we should uh we should go do paintball while it's so cold. I do that. Oh, yeah
[00:37:09] You should get some cigars and go to paintball. I'm gonna be i'm all sober. I had a wild birthday drug
[00:37:14] Oh, yeah, tell us about it stop. Tell us about your your fun. Garlic drugs. I'm not smoking shit
[00:37:20] I'm just I'm my body's a temple except come on dude. You have cancer not yet. Hopefully not
[00:37:25] We'll see I have he said it's some kind of growth. I have to get a fucking biopsy
[00:37:29] Don't have cancers if it was a cancer would have tore through my mouth
[00:37:32] They said but I do have a growth that's moved my teeth
[00:37:35] That's so something's gonna have to come out. I'm gonna have to have cancer is gonna suck
[00:37:39] Now you would probably ever have probably surgery that other gum thing that's happening is you have some sort of like
[00:37:46] Gum disease where it's like awesome. It's not it's the bone. No. No, it's it's a growth in the book. I know but it's your gums
[00:37:53] It's because you're so cute doctor Nick. There's no baby like
[00:37:56] Okay, why don't you let me fucking explain my god did through it. Continue. Follow me a baby. Guessing is the
[00:38:02] I didn't get some more scientific knowledge. Yeah, that's true. There's a guy like me was like, you know what it probably is
[00:38:09] Is you put up to tie a key to a kite?
[00:38:11] That's how we proved that the Jews are trying to control the government, but that's right symbols
[00:38:16] Symbols that they love so yes, and was he wrong? No, he wasn't wrong. Now. He's on the hundred dollar bill the highest on
[00:38:23] And he's talking about the high pyramid guy that he gets to be on it. Yeah, it's their favorite thing is a hundred dollar bill the high pyramid guy
[00:38:31] Yeah, no Benjamin Franklin. Oh, I time yeah, that movie wasn't very good. Yes. It was I know it wasn't
[00:38:38] Yeah, you're a fucking idiot. It was it was bad about it was like fake good fellas
[00:38:42] I thought that Alison Janie and I thought what's her name were both really good. Okay, um, so to the biggest characters were really good
[00:38:50] Yeah, but it was a bad movie. Yeah, I didn't like the way they made it. I got a good
[00:38:54] I got a good bid out of it. Go ahead. What is it? No, I did it to stand in
[00:38:59] What is it? Well, you know the whole movie the premises is like it's like oh, it's this poor white trash girl competing in a rich girl sport
[00:39:06] And it's this underdog story and it's like yeah sure that makes sense in the context of like only the american athletes participating in
[00:39:15] Figure skate right right it's like not for all the rest of figure skating at large in the world. It's poor people
[00:39:22] Well, I mean, it's global poor. I mean, uh, uh, uh, like
[00:39:26] the uh, uh, I watched the figure skating this year and I got a I got a glimpse at this big gay chinese man
[00:39:33] No one knows how old he is
[00:39:36] You like I'm sorry, but fucking tanya Harding has a birthday
[00:39:41] Right, no one knows how this guy doesn't know how old he is. He's just somewhere in his 30s
[00:39:46] Just don't wrap rings around his cock. I guess
[00:39:49] Uh, but anyways, it's like
[00:39:51] You know you think her mom fucking hates her imagine you've aborted nine of your daughters
[00:39:58] You finally have a son and he's like oh god. I'm going to be iced answer
[00:40:04] I want to be iced at the other way to sneak in the chinese voice
[00:40:07] Not cigarettes but full opium pipes put out on that kid's fucking head
[00:40:12] Because he brought shame to his family with his ice dancing
[00:40:15] Anyway, so did that at the stand so guess who now has four jokes where I do a Chinese voice
[00:40:22] Congrats, man. I called out my china chunk
[00:40:28] Uh, my china chunk is the erection I get when I watch one night one night china
[00:40:33] Your joey knee waller your your your non functioning chode is
[00:40:38] How dare you my dick's been working like a charm recently. Yeah, mm-hmm. Uh oh
[00:40:42] Yeah, man. It's uh, it's you know, it's just been oh, I've been meditating you have and I know
[00:40:50] Wait, so it's tough tell tell everyone what it is
[00:40:53] Hold on. It's like, you know like meditation is kind of bullshit. It's like all this stuff
[00:40:57] That's I don't think it is shut the fuck up and let me finish what I'm saying
[00:41:02] For point to just continue
[00:41:04] Just for once just finish your thing just for one. I didn't interrupt you for once in your life
[00:41:12] For once. All right. Do your meditation chuck guess that all right
[00:41:16] So meditation is something that you know like white people here do but in china. Yes, you know, there's a guy sitting there like
[00:41:24] Five that's five bits. I have
[00:41:26] I was throwing another one on the china chuck
[00:41:35] Um no, but I mean, you know just that like
[00:41:39] People like it's like zen in particular or whatever. It's like this is a
[00:41:46] religion or a
[00:41:47] Philosophy for people that sit and do rice farming all day long, right?
[00:41:52] And you have to find a way to not kill yourself because I have to I'm the repetitive your life. Yeah. Yeah
[00:41:57] It's not for like somebody that makes $80,000 a year and they're like my hair's going gray
[00:42:02] Right. How can I feel how can I become more of a narcissist side feels being on trying transcendental meditation?
[00:42:08] That's like you're a fucking billionaire dude. He's a billionaire and he's a bad person
[00:42:12] Yeah, it seems yeah. He is a bad person
[00:42:15] But uh, I don't know the guy personally, you know, although didn't he like date like a child at some point
[00:42:20] Yeah, he dated a child big in cities 17 year old pull the dane cook
[00:42:25] You know shot at what's in it. He's like that. Uh, you know, I confused his uh
[00:42:30] Oh, he's confused. Uh Larry nasser and Aziz and sorry
[00:42:36] Yeah, I always mix those two guys up
[00:42:39] Because I love him in funny people. Yeah, they're both rapists
[00:42:44] Uh, I mean regardless of the details. Mm-hmm. There's no reason to go into the details, right?
[00:42:49] They're both equally bad
[00:42:51] They're big are both tiny. They're both sex criminals sex criminals and there's no it was disrespectful to the victims
[00:42:59] To to draw any different
[00:43:02] Differential between the two. Yeah, there's no reason to do that
[00:43:05] That's true and that's the thing we need to understand with sexual assault
[00:43:07] Is it Larry nasser and Aziz Ansari are the same?
[00:43:11] In the same way that they're both some kind of indian, you know, yeah, I don't need kind of some some type of yeah
[00:43:16] Maybe I don't need to know the details because it would be racist to know the detail. Yeah. Yeah, yeah
[00:43:22] And then so there's no reason for me to figure out what they did
[00:43:26] I agree with you. That's a good there. Also both guys. I didn't think were very funny until about two weeks ago
[00:43:33] You think Larry nasser is really funny now
[00:43:36] It's got a serious the plane bit. Yeah, it's more like hilarious nasser. You know, like
[00:43:40] I was nasser. Wait, what are you saying stuff? Larry Larry the cable Larry nasser the cable guy
[00:43:48] Wait, we're done. Dan cook is fucking a child, too. Yeah, 19 year old dude
[00:43:52] Right now. Looks like fuck the Harvey wants to you literally look exactly like Harvey. Really? No joke
[00:43:58] Yeah, he's got the fucked up lumpy ass weird body. Yes speaking of and you
[00:44:04] No, that's peeking of anything
[00:44:06] And uh, it's funny because in his instagram pictures he used all that like Chinese like face smoothening software
[00:44:13] Yeah, the shit Chinese people used to like make. Oh, he really does look like shit
[00:44:17] He looks like Harvey Weinstein. Dude. He's like bad as shit and so
[00:44:21] Mona mexican whoa
[00:44:24] Radio
[00:44:25] Um, oh, yeah, what's wrong with his fucking skin
[00:44:29] It was yeah, it's all like photo like bad Photoshop. Yeah, it's like korean girl selfie
[00:44:34] Yeah, that's what I said filters Chinese app
[00:44:38] Um anyway, I did a bunch of fucking drugs. I took bunch of edibles. I took uh acid and then did mushrooms
[00:44:45] Um my birthday. I run out of drugs. Yeah, I think I might get into cutting
[00:44:49] It's like a depressed teenage girl. Dude. I followed this girl on instagram. Nobody follows her
[00:44:54] It's like a it's a hidden gem. I found some nice depressed teenager
[00:44:58] But she had like the funniest fucking post yesterday
[00:45:00] It was uh here. Let me say I hope I die soon. I think it's
[00:45:06] To get a count
[00:45:08] I die
[00:45:10] Soon let me pull this on is that the name her handle
[00:45:15] Yeah, we started late so I'm probably gonna order a burrito on the phone during the show hit him up lucha lucha
[00:45:20] They don't sponsor the show. We're just big fans
[00:45:25] That's right
[00:45:26] Actually, I got hooked up there once. Yeah, here it is. There's your post. It's just a picture with text and it says wake the fuck up
[00:45:34] Puncture waited by periods
[00:45:36] So the depression is not special anxiety is not cute self-home scars are not beautiful suicide is not poetic
[00:45:42] Eating disorders are not glamorous
[00:45:45] You don't fucking want them, you know and their caption is at my school
[00:45:49] I know people say suicide jokes and do drugs for fun
[00:45:52] I know a few pretty girls for attention
[00:45:54] I know I smoke because I need to relax. I drink because I don't want to feel anything
[00:46:00] I cut because I can't get going on in my mind
[00:46:03] I cry because everyone has something to hate about me
[00:46:06] I sit alone because I know secretly everyone hates me
[00:46:09] I put pills in my mouth waiting to die because I know everyone would be happier with me gone
[00:46:14] Let's face it. It's the truth
[00:46:17] 10 likes
[00:46:19] That's tough to you. Yeah, she might I'm guessing she didn't have a chill childhood
[00:46:23] I mean
[00:46:25] What's gonna happen is this girl is gonna fucking in six years be like 22 and just work as a temp and be like
[00:46:30] We're really into microbrews
[00:46:33] This is just like this is typical dumb teenage bullshit sometimes something particularly interesting
[00:46:39] Yeah, that's not this not sometimes every single fucking teenager feels this way and if they don't then they're like
[00:46:46] Then those are the people that should kill themselves, right?
[00:46:49] Right. I got a pass. Well, sometimes those people though that cut and shit and I've got like got like ultra molested or some shit
[00:46:55] Yeah, I think cutting is like it's way more girls than you
[00:47:00] Lesti the dust the biggest molestation possible
[00:47:05] Multiplier molestation multiplier
[00:47:08] I'm gonna call this burrito in right now
[00:47:10] um
[00:47:12] Yeah, that's I mean
[00:47:14] I I feel like I should just throw that girl like or you're still playing right is that what you're saying?
[00:47:19] Start messaging her problems. Shut up fucking it's so hard being creep
[00:47:25] You're fucking creeped. No, I'm not not me. I just follow these teens and laugh at them. Yeah. Yeah, you're the
[00:47:33] You're the you're the normal one. Yeah
[00:47:37] You're the cool guy. This fucking asshole. You're just a poem posted. Oh, they don't fucking pick up their phone sometimes brutal
[00:47:43] Yeah, I get really mad at breakfast burrito, dude
[00:47:46] Calling you were doing on seamless you were calling a burrito place
[00:47:50] Because you don't want to wait. He has to go. No, he has to go to work after this wait
[00:47:55] Just uh seamless and is there an option for pick up on seamless? Maybe I'm just gonna call back
[00:48:01] I'm gonna stay on this fucking line forever. I'm sorry the double call back. I want to see manager, please
[00:48:07] This is bad listening. No, it's not. I've been on the phone for 20 minutes waiting the place of burrito order bro
[00:48:14] I have a job to go to yeah, dude
[00:48:16] What's his name matt christman's friend used to work there and he he hooked me up with free burritos a couple of them
[00:48:21] Did you kiss his mouth and his penis? No, but he had a man again. He had a cool
[00:48:25] Milwaukee feelings. Yeah
[00:48:29] No, he's friend from his friend from with konzo texas
[00:48:32] Amber texas aka virtual texas is elixis texas is virgial texas is mom
[00:48:43] Yeah, i'm gonna start that rumor
[00:48:45] What the fuck my call cannot be completed
[00:48:49] Damn really just fucking damn burrito damn number
[00:48:53] Dude, I can't believe it must be so embarrassing for virgial to watch his mom get railed out like that
[00:48:59] What happened to elixis texas
[00:49:01] Uh, she's a senator. I think yeah. Yeah from texas
[00:49:05] It's her and john cornin. I don't know what happens to all of them. Don't they just become like
[00:49:10] Just become horrors or no, they like become moms
[00:49:15] They just become
[00:49:17] You know what i'm like seriously don't think i'm like ask her
[00:49:21] Become like high-end escorts and they become strippers. No well janet james is just like likes israel a lot now. Yeah, yeah
[00:49:28] They become like she looks like shit. Yeah real estate agent in life dude
[00:49:33] I mean fucking look at look at cal pen
[00:49:35] He was kumar from herald and kumar and then now he's a porn star they became obama's friend
[00:49:41] Yeah, and now he's back to being kumar. Oh, is he are they rebooting it? No, I don't know but he worked in
[00:49:47] I I can't imagine he has the same. What was he in charge of like
[00:49:51] communications i put it in a
[00:49:53] millennial outreach or something yeah, yeah
[00:49:56] Yeah
[00:49:57] You got charisa breakfast? No just that okay will either do the podcast or have your phone call don't
[00:50:05] Don't don't speak the phone call into the
[00:50:09] No, no, no, this is good. This is making a real three-dimensional. My name's stavros and she's like fates. Oh
[00:50:16] What
[00:50:18] Rrrr
[00:50:20] Rrrr
[00:50:22] That's weird actually if you rearrange the letters in stavros. Howlkius you get very fat. So no, I don't think
[00:50:28] There's no f in my name
[00:50:31] Yes
[00:50:34] Stuff
[00:50:36] Including this the the written out sound effects of you breathing
[00:50:43] No, I breathe beautifully dude. Yeah, I've been breathing really bad on this. I think I have a cold
[00:50:48] Yeah, you don't have a cold
[00:50:50] Um, don't lie don't lie to the fans of the show
[00:50:53] Well, they can find out if I do have a cold tomorrow night at carolines on broad
[00:50:57] Carolines which we sold out by the way. Yeah, it will be
[00:51:01] Andre steakhouse shirts available. Mm. Yep. Yours. They look good. These golden angel shirts as well. They fit good
[00:51:07] I don't have any shirts. We got a nice little athletic cut to them. That's nice. Do they I tried one on guess what
[00:51:13] Are you will be if you get in a medium? You're gonna maybe one of you will get to wear the shirt. I fucking wore
[00:51:18] You're gonna sell it. Oh, you're gonna. You're not even holding on to it. Ah wow
[00:51:23] That's Nick. Dude. He has knows he's not a sentimental type not a sentimental type
[00:51:28] I'm also maximizing profits. I'm also paying it forward to the audience by not not keeping a single shirt
[00:51:35] Yeah fucking mitts there you go. He loves he loves the fans man. Yeah, I
[00:51:40] Saw my friend for the first time in a while eric
[00:51:43] Uh last week and he was just going on to me about uh, he's like dude. He's like fucking
[00:51:49] He's like capitalism is religion
[00:51:52] You're a fucking bitch dude with your dsa
[00:51:55] Batch and then he's like I vote for fucking gary johnson
[00:51:59] Rex Tillerson is the smartest guy in the fucking administration. Oh, yeah, dude. It was so fun. Sex Rex
[00:52:05] Sex Rex
[00:52:07] Dude, I'm I totally forgot how much I missed eric until last week like getting into it
[00:52:12] Like a freshman dormitory argument with him like in a bar in lily mr.
[00:52:18] Yeah, he's like a proud libertarian
[00:52:20] Tolerious. He's like yeah, dude. I wanted gary johnson get five percent New York stay. That's my goal
[00:52:26] Um, that's his goal. Yeah
[00:52:28] Gary johnson. I love gary johnson stop smoking weed you saw that clip that someone dropped last week of the uh, the
[00:52:35] driver's licenses
[00:52:37] From the libertarian debate like for president. Mm-hmm. It was pretty funny. It was like uh
[00:52:43] They're like should there be driver's licenses? They're just like hell no
[00:52:49] Then gary johnson's like i'd like to see some qualifications the entire like auditor. It just starts booing
[00:52:58] God damn you libertarians are so fucking stupid
[00:53:01] They're really they they also like probably don't want like an age of consent or like
[00:53:05] Like oh no way
[00:53:07] Or like paved roads that are free to you only if it's only if it's maximizing profit the market dude
[00:53:13] Yeah, the market. I love the sweet beautiful market
[00:53:16] They think that like every he was telling me like every publicly funded project is like
[00:53:22] uh like just bridges to like a place where there's like three people and it costs like five billion dollars
[00:53:28] Yeah
[00:53:30] Oh man, what are you gonna do for round times the atom? Um, well is it ashwins day? Yeah, it's schmutz wednesday
[00:53:40] How about snatch Wednesday?
[00:53:42] Oh, you go to the black on your face
[00:53:44] You fucking slag
[00:53:47] Just because you have cancer you're gonna do blackface you fucking you fucking whore
[00:53:52] Yeah, what you four years old you think you're because you're four you have cancer you can do blackface
[00:53:56] Not an old hospital you get the fuck out of my hospital
[00:54:02] This is an hospital for more those owners
[00:54:07] Bar
[00:54:07] Don't you guys just be a mother like me
[00:54:11] Yeah, fuck that she's a smasher. She's just be a do Eiffel tower. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She got full monty
[00:54:19] Can you imagine how fucking gay it is for two guys to be double t-berry girl?
[00:54:24] That just be like this is our chance the Eiffel tower like we can we can finally fucking do it. Yeah, man
[00:54:31] Sounds awesome
[00:54:33] Hey, you high five with your buddy then the high five. It's like holding hands girl leaves you guys kind of rub cocks
[00:54:40] You know ones who knows where each other's cocks end up
[00:54:45] You know, it's like that's a real tribute to france and the guys who built the Eiffel tower. That's true. We would come in
[00:54:50] That's just that's the real Eiffel tower. Yeah, you go up to the top of it
[00:54:56] If you actually a lot of people don't know this
[00:54:58] But if you go to the top of the Eiffel tower and you sit on it, you can fit the entire thing in your ass
[00:55:03] Become president. Yep. That's how macron got elected
[00:55:09] That's why that other lady who's a fascist her pussy wasn't big enough. Oh, yeah, marina pen
[00:55:15] She tried but she could be marina le pen. I love knowing things about french politics me too
[00:55:21] There's that there was another the third guy. Yeah, she was her name is marina Charlotte ruse
[00:55:28] From miss your obon pen
[00:55:34] Prime minister
[00:55:36] The race of vida france and Pierre obon
[00:55:39] I'm Johnny Debs character in shock. That's all rise for the national anthem
[00:55:53] So good about my penis
[00:55:57] All of me
[00:56:03] And then also the phrase obulate do from us from Dexter's lab that one episode
[00:56:06] Where was that? No, remember that episode no, well, jacks are keeps
[00:56:11] Mompin wa dons to bush
[00:56:14] Put put my penis in your mouth. Yep. Oh, is that what bush means? Yeah, it's just mouth. Yeah
[00:56:21] Jamila, you know this whole time they're being different the force that force do boost the power of bust
[00:56:28] J
[00:56:49] The life of busting
[00:56:51] You never saw that movie by uh, it was my favorite movie by go-dard. Mm-hmm
[00:56:58] Barry gay, sorry about gah, it's hard. Thank you. It's got hard. Also got hard
[00:57:05] All right. Well, how about luka beats
[00:57:09] often
[00:57:10] Beds who look best bison bison beats on beats off beats off beats off beats off
[00:57:18] But yeah, man. Yeah, I love the coming up with riffs
[00:57:27] Having jokes and stuff live show definitely isn't gonna be an hour this kind of yeah
[00:57:32] Yeah, that's yeah
[00:57:33] It was kind of yeah, I was kind of yeah one right before the live show but whatever we have 24 hours to reach. Oh, yeah
[00:57:38] I got I didn't sleep last night
[00:57:41] Yeah, I think we can all agree that it's up to me to figure out the riffs on the show. I got all right
[00:57:46] Uh, you know Adam's the gay one. Yeah, I'm I'm sort of the sheriff
[00:57:50] Mm-hmm. You know the sheriff. I'm the fucking sheriff. I know what you ever say. I'm not the sheriff damsel
[00:57:56] Damsel. Yeah, you know what I am
[00:57:59] I'm the
[00:58:02] Got him. Yeah, what are you I was actually gonna say the town gay guy
[00:58:08] So you guys got a right
[00:58:10] Sheriff somebody tied the town gay guy up on the railroad tracks
[00:58:14] Good
[00:58:18] And see a chair of if he does who are we gonna call the slurs?
[00:58:24] Darn tooten you're right fellas. I'm getting a posse together to help that pussy
[00:58:31] The pussy
[00:58:32] The pussy who's the sheriff of the pussy posse the deputized the rest of them um leo just wrote a horse
[00:58:39] Yeah, I think the towing wires house. No. Yeah, david blaine had the sta warden for the tin dude the shield
[00:58:47] Take a piss. I think you know, then maybe leave no are we done? We're not done. We're still be so much more time
[00:58:54] Do we have so you can't piss
[00:58:57] All right. Well, that's fine dude. Let's yeah, let's talk more about what if the pussy posse were a real old west
[00:59:04] Uh posse, right? I'm getting tired of this. I have to go to work nonsense of stops. Yeah
[00:59:11] We should get him fired from this job. We should do something
[00:59:15] Despicable on this podcast so that someone associates him with this podcast
[00:59:20] So he they're like well you have to fire him because he's associated with here
[00:59:24] We can talk about this while he's not here because he doesn't know anything about it corruption charges suggested for net and yahoo
[00:59:29] Oh, yeah, well, you know what it was dude fraud. Nope. It was my interview on an israeli news
[00:59:36] Yeah, actually this is what right before you did the mac weldon read the guy the producer from the israeli news show
[00:59:42] Who I guess booked patty to talk about
[00:59:45] Frasier just text me and said that he'd like to have stop on stops getting called up to the big leagues dude
[00:59:52] What does he have? Why does he know to talk about body positivity? No one ever has no one asked me to do anything anymore
[00:59:58] Well, my my man philip dude. He'll ask you fuck philip and fuck that show. I'm not doing it
[01:00:04] You'll probably see him nobody fucking asked me I'll get fucking asked to do a goddamn thing and I'm tired of it
[01:00:10] I'm tired of not getting any. What are you talking about?
[01:00:12] You can share for this fucking podcast. I'm tired of you. Do you expect great gut-filled and
[01:00:19] Redeye. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, dude a couple of hot appearances on yeah, it's some fox news
[01:00:25] You had some is uh is is what's your name still on fox?
[01:00:30] Cat is she still doing that stuff
[01:00:33] Cat who from dc cat Tim. Yeah, I think so she's still a pundit. I believe so. Well, that's wild
[01:00:42] Uh
[01:00:43] We oh, yeah
[01:00:44] So anyway, the guy that had me on israeli 24 news
[01:00:47] Well wants to have you want to talk about body positivity and he was wondering if you got his email. I did not but I guess I'll read it
[01:00:57] Yeah, well, you know
[01:00:58] My appearance resulted in uh net and yahoo getting oh, this is funny. Um, they found that his son real quick
[01:01:06] This was not gonna be good. Yeah, it's not gonna be funny. Well, it's kind of we can talk about it on our podcast
[01:01:11] It's kind of related
[01:01:12] Totally, but they found his son net and yah his son like is a pepe and he was like sharing
[01:01:19] Like it is kind of funny pepe memes on his facebook page
[01:01:23] No
[01:01:24] Yeah, he was like sharing memes of like uh george soros looking like a lizard person like holding like strings with the globe on it
[01:01:33] And like yeah, and like just like anti-semitic like really yeah, and then david duke was like this guy rocks
[01:01:40] He's like he's cool. David duke. Oh, when he cosigned shit
[01:01:45] And then it actually his son net and yah his son is the worst guy to be into is jordan peterson
[01:01:50] Who is that guy? He's like a Canadian professor. Yeah, his whole thing is like logic is the
[01:01:56] It's like there's no such thing as being trans
[01:02:00] Apparently like the first chapter of his book is about sitting up straight
[01:02:05] Oh, yes
[01:02:07] Not having bad not saying your pants. Yeah your puns your puns
[01:02:12] Not talking your puns. All right. Well, I gotta go so many guys have sore you posture
[01:02:17] You gotta go what time what time means to be at work?
[01:02:19] I was supposed to be at work at one and i'm not gonna be at work at one
[01:02:23] Yeah, you gotta call your time. No, there's no chance 25 minutes to get to it staid and maderson square guard
[01:02:29] I could do this. You can take a turn take your car. I guess I took car here luckily
[01:02:33] I uh they didn't send out a call sheet. So i'm just gonna use that as an excuse, but I know what time i'm supposed to be there
[01:02:38] All right. Well, I guess that's the time and i still have to get my burrito
[01:02:43] Uh and is it sure for this town?
[01:02:45] Good luck and good night