Cum Town | Premium | 04/20/2020
[00:00:00] What's up fellas happy greek easter happy greek easter dude. Thank you the true easter greek
[00:00:06] Jesus came out of the cave. That's right dude. He came out fucking wearing wearing some ch- wearing
[00:00:11] a wife beater with a hole in it. He came out hello where is the pussy? I am here to get the
[00:00:19] pussy. Jesus cake greek Jesus was uh sexually harassing his 16 year old hostess at his diner in
[00:00:25] heaven for three days and then he came out and that's the story of greek easter. Is that true?
[00:00:31] Oh yeah that's true. It's in the greek bubble. Isn't the original the oldest one is greek isn't it?
[00:00:39] Yeah I think just because we that's when we had the fucking language on lock bro
[00:00:44] that's when everything was in greek greek was what english is now back in the day
[00:00:48] because Alexander was out there sucking it fucking up until india doing some sus shit if you ask
[00:00:53] he was doing sus shit he was being sus all over the world he was a sus tour of ancient
[00:01:00] and minor. Alexander the great conquered all of Asia because he wanted to see different kinds
[00:01:06] of penises that's the whole reason he was doing it dude different hues different sizes tastes
[00:01:13] I bet you a bank I bet you a Bengali penis tastes different than a you know kazak yeah he got all
[00:01:21] the way to fucking india right um I think so yeah and then he wept he conquered like the whole
[00:01:27] middle east yeah and then he wept because he was out of dick never lost a single battle how crazy
[00:01:32] for Alex for Alexander wept because there was no more cock to suck how crazy is that to never lose
[00:01:39] anything yeah that's right bro never lost never he does a good ass streak are you serious not
[00:01:46] a single battle I don't think he would ever lost a single battle big time respect bro he's like
[00:01:51] like the greatest general of all time that fucking rocks and he was probably just free balling it
[00:01:57] for some like how much research can you do when you're just going you just keep going fucking with
[00:02:02] that east or west east both directions yeah but mostly east because his shit went all the way out
[00:02:09] to to india didn't it like way out so I believe so and then it gave way to what was it the mughal
[00:02:16] empire comes after I don't know the history got split into four different ones yeah and that's
[00:02:21] where the Byzantine Empire that the fucking that the no good fucking Turks captured later
[00:02:27] Constantinople they took it and made it fucking Istanbul but that was our shit I'm feeling
[00:02:33] patriotic today dude yeah because of you can't guess cons the coolest of them yeah because it's
[00:02:39] like they're they're like way of life was just a bunch of like just idiots and huts just fucking
[00:02:45] shit they had like a council but then other than that it's like you know they were just fucking
[00:02:53] retarded Chinese people who would ride horses around they were just chopping people up and
[00:02:58] taking pussy just took over the entire world because they would like take over a place and be like
[00:03:04] all right now you got your own army and you got your own boys and then you're part of the boys
[00:03:08] it's kind of like a dudes rock that's kind of real it's a very dudes rock situation
[00:03:12] kind of everybody's dude because they're like listen here's the trade-off we're fucking
[00:03:16] every woman you've ever loved or come into contact with but once we're gone you get them back and
[00:03:21] you get to find your own new pussy from other bitches yeah and bitch bitch in this me in this
[00:03:26] regard meaning lesser Chinese men and it was it was kind of like it's kind of like a pussy pyramid
[00:03:33] scheme if you think about it Genghis Khan because he's just going around and if you get guys under
[00:03:37] you you get their pussy it's exactly like a pussy pyramid scheme yeah and it's you know
[00:03:43] didn't they say some of it most of his DNA like one fourth of Chinese people are like his
[00:03:49] grandson or great great great grandson or some shit really yeah whereas Alexander was a gentleman
[00:03:56] was out there looking at literature and sucking off men and fucking women but maybe honestly
[00:04:03] Alexander probably got pegged what do you mean like with some like early creep I've trapped
[00:04:10] with ivory yeah so not that too pleasant dude yeah you polish it up you take an elephant's
[00:04:16] tusk that's failed you of the elephant that died in battle like a warrior you you reward him with
[00:04:21] the afterlife of getting to get to fuck the emperor's ass it's that's the highest honor an elephant to
[00:04:28] have to think how like little is different in between now and then in the grand scheme of things
[00:04:33] I mean you got like cars antibiotics I mean we went to the moon at one point but that'll probably
[00:04:39] never happen again yeah probably not they had some medicine it will in like 3000 years yeah
[00:04:48] what what will the move well you know 1000 maybe we're probably gonna get what you guys think
[00:04:52] we're gonna get another dark age coming dude where we forget everything for a while
[00:04:56] uh because of the corona no just just in general I think probably no what about it if a nuke goes
[00:05:04] off why would a nuke go off why we fight china yeah because we're met we're trying to we're
[00:05:13] doing great we're telling them we're telling them if they race and they started the virus yeah
[00:05:17] shout out to Biden on political mastermind but what's your what was your thing Nick you you're
[00:05:23] saying it's not that much different everyone's just trying to get pussy and yeah the outfits
[00:05:29] are maybe a little bit different like maybe more people fucking around with sandals than there are
[00:05:34] now back then you mean yeah for the most part it's like chilling with your boys getting pissed off
[00:05:42] at other people maybe up like get resolving it because you're like you find you got like some
[00:05:48] types of music you both like yeah um you know like traveling and then you get to india and you're
[00:05:55] like I've done it I'm traveling I mean there's a lot of stuff that's like yeah you know just the
[00:06:02] same it's the same shit but people kid like you don't get to kill now like that's the thing you
[00:06:08] you burned brighter back then but shit was like you didn't have to think about feelings because
[00:06:13] you if you got pissed off you just took the fucking knife out or the fucking sword out
[00:06:17] and you worked through it dude now we get to live long like a round town that wasn't happening and
[00:06:22] like if you got to be a warrior in the army yeah but if you were a Roman citizen you weren't like
[00:06:27] you couldn't just stab some guy to death and not you probably could a lot easier and you
[00:06:33] like murder Caesar yeah dude should fucking yeah but that's like a major historic event that
[00:06:39] wasn't like every day I could think of what you have you know it's wild in china if somebody owes
[00:06:44] you money you're allowed to just kidnap them whoa really yeah like the police the police will be
[00:06:50] like what's going on here and you're like this motherfucker owes me 20 dollars they're like all
[00:06:56] right well you got to let them go but yeah you got to pay him that 20 dollars is good I hope you
[00:07:02] learned your lesson yeah spot is I hope you learned lesson as to somebody to spot you for some low
[00:07:07] Maine which is the only meal available in this country at the mcdonald's they were putting up
[00:07:13] signs they're like black people aren't allowed in the restaurant do you know what the Chinese
[00:07:19] well in China they blame black people for the coronavirus what yeah wow wait till racist here
[00:07:26] get ahead and get a hold of that they're like wow that way it gets both black people and chinese
[00:07:32] people's fault anybody gets a hold of that dude that's anybody that's like it's racist to say
[00:07:37] it's China's fault it's just like just stop it's just it doesn't work anymore this is like this
[00:07:43] doesn't work so I don't get that at all what do you fucking stop saying that I mean say whatever
[00:07:49] you want I don't give a shit but you're an idiot and stop wait what do you mean stop like stop
[00:07:55] trying to be woke about the virus but yeah like thinking that that like that is even remotely
[00:08:00] I completely agree that's like anything anyone should be talking about is how is racist to
[00:08:06] and also people don't even like I guess conservatives were saying at first that it escaped from the
[00:08:11] labs and now it has to be racist yeah did it it's like which sounds less racist to me than like
[00:08:18] oh it came from one of their bad eating festivals that sounds like that sounds way more racist
[00:08:27] how dare you yeah it's not called Israel Israel created the weapon or created this as a bio
[00:08:34] weapon you'd be like that's anti-Semitic like okay we'll go with the other story then that it came
[00:08:38] from Christian children's blood that they were sucking out of their penises is that a less racist
[00:08:44] they only do that to Jews yeah no they do it to Gentiles the people that have blood out of other
[00:08:51] Jews well it's they did it with Christian children and that's where the virus came from that's
[00:08:54] why this stuff they had to stop doing yeah everybody knows that I just don't understand can't like
[00:09:00] it's it's ridiculous that you can't criticize another country without being called for it is that a
[00:09:06] is that a portrait of Assad behind you uh no it's it's my grandfather oh oh hell yeah looking over
[00:09:14] your shoulder yeah and that's oh that's his brother who they should hook up no he was killed he was
[00:09:23] shot down he was in the royal air force and he was shot down over Crete oh yeah they're not these
[00:09:29] yeah right if he was a I don't think he was a pilot I think he was just in the plane
[00:09:34] in abigat I think he was in that way giving the pilot a massage no he wasn't flying it but he
[00:09:38] was in the plane whatever he's right you need a sandwich in the side of war you're hungry he's
[00:09:43] the hero it's job bro it was like it was like a make a wish sort of thing it wasn't a make a wish
[00:09:49] it was in the royal air I want I want to go on airplane they're like okay Adam senior
[00:09:56] actually is my father's namesake yeah okay okay Adam senior we're gonna we're going on the airplane
[00:10:05] ride yay I want to go to greece into an airplane yeah he was very he's buried now in a greek aisle
[00:10:13] we should go visit his grave we should go to crete to visit his grave and all uh yeah we should
[00:10:20] yeah we should crete is nice beautiful I hear it's madness yeah I haven't I've never been but I want to go
[00:10:26] you should crete my ass what the hell come on bro what should cur eat my ass oh oh I think
[00:10:35] oh damn dude no it comes out please do not take away the one example of valor in my entire family
[00:10:43] that's not your great uncle was shot down over greece while fluffing the pilot that was fighting
[00:10:50] not fluffing he was navigated he could have lied again it gets it gets stressful up there man
[00:10:58] you got to blow off some steam what what better way excuse we need the man with the smallest most
[00:11:02] girly hands we can find in the entire world bro this is the one example of heroism
[00:11:08] it's like a fucking montage of fucking jewish guys putting their hands up this this man's oh my
[00:11:14] god these are the gayest most womanish hands i've ever seen in my life he's oh his nails are already
[00:11:20] painted he's just had to read maths you don't need big hands for that where's that i got some pretty
[00:11:27] girly hands you're chosen son your story is actually really sad this might be like a tall
[00:11:36] tail but he was done flying a shift and another navigator was like yo i'm about to fuck this girl
[00:11:42] can you fly my shift for one and then i'll take your next one and then he went down he went down
[00:11:48] trying to wing it big respect that's big respect yeah yeah literally the guy's like literal wingman
[00:11:55] yeah he was literally wingman yeah wow you know what i'm sorry i take it back what i just said about
[00:12:00] it yeah he's alleged dude he's alleged he didn't have girly hands he had big hands when he jerked
[00:12:06] that guy off he wasn't drinking the boy the real story was that he was assigned a hot air balloon
[00:12:15] and you know this is this is in the role of the air forces hot air balloon is back back in olden
[00:12:21] times you know how they say you know you're not supposed to drop a penny off a building or whatever
[00:12:24] because it could kill someone he would that's actually that's actually a warfare work they would
[00:12:28] they would fly hot air balloons over cities and they would drop pennies right and kill people and
[00:12:33] he got over the city and he looked at the penny in his hand and he couldn't bring himself
[00:12:41] he couldn't bring himself to drop the penny to let go of it right and and he hesitated and
[00:12:48] they shot him down you know he would rather he clutched the penny of that oh that's crazy because
[00:12:54] what i heard is somebody forced the penny out of his hands and then he jumped after it trying to
[00:12:58] oh more on yeah i think that i think that he was that
[00:13:10] yes he can't fit in these his smile he dies happy at least he's like that it's like the end of crank
[00:13:22] the coroner's like the other one that was this is the largest smile i've ever seen on a corpse in
[00:13:27] my life that one was in occupied italy after the war and then after he died i was going through his
[00:13:34] office and i guess the flirt back in those days was a girl would give you a snapshot like a small
[00:13:39] picture of herself like a selfie and then write a note on the back and i just saw all these Italian
[00:13:44] women like this man was like five four five and they were like barney when you took me from behind
[00:13:50] underneath the breach it was the best i have ever had you know basically they wanted to get out of
[00:13:55] italy i guess wrong guys and it was all in broken english there were there were six there was six
[00:14:00] no perfect this one also claimed he claimed that he lost his v at 12 all right all right we've
[00:14:07] been over this he's the guy yeah he's dad forced uh the border to get raped by his child no there was
[00:14:14] that there's a funny older one kind of a little little boozy move
[00:14:19] did you see that interview someone said it to me there's an interview with boozy where they're like
[00:14:26] if you could do it all over again like what would you change she's like probably probably have less
[00:14:31] less uh less uh different baby mamas probably the same amount of kids yeah less different baby
[00:14:37] problems respect yeah boozy badass if you see that clip of him where he's like put you put
[00:14:44] you on live a key thousand dollars um i thought i do yeah there was a you got a woman alive like
[00:14:50] to twerk and then he saw her kid he's like oh he's like he clicked out of the media he was just uh
[00:14:57] he was just his move is just to offer women money on instagram live to show their pussies and honestly
[00:15:02] i respect that so much yeah that in the murders he's probably committed that's better than what any
[00:15:07] comedian we know is doing on instagram live do you remember when c murder got arrested for murder
[00:15:12] yeah that's a piece bro right there the name i love it dude there's another one where gilly the
[00:15:22] kid you guys know him like that he's like uh the guy who's feuding with uh he's the filly rapper
[00:15:27] that's shooting with like little wane and bird man and he just had a song he was like it was just like
[00:15:32] fuck cops i'm selling weed and it's just like he and the next day he's like shooting that video and
[00:15:38] like the next day he gets arrested he's like you're on or i'm innocent he's just like yeah
[00:15:44] just released a song that's very explicitly walking you through a crime and then he's just like
[00:15:50] no i've never i've never sold i'm a innocent man there's this guy but it's like you don't know
[00:15:56] what the truth is you know what i mean yeah dude it's wwe wrestling art man just according to camera
[00:16:02] on there's this guy uh tjx something for he's from detroit and all of his songs are about uh credit
[00:16:12] card scams that he runs and he calls it swiping yeah that was there's one where he like he goes
[00:16:19] their best buy he gets like free x-boxes and tv it's pretty funny that uh dead press song pimp
[00:16:26] the system yes yeah yeah yeah classic just uh it's like a youtube video for a scam right for you
[00:16:33] it's a it's a wiki how you're not a fucking steal from your shitty job yeah there's been some
[00:16:40] uh tjx six this guy's name there's some other really good ones the the um the race tjk didn't
[00:16:47] that's about just committing a murder and then the other is only a song which is a great song and
[00:16:52] he just got arrested because of it and then there's murder on my mind which is about i got i don't
[00:16:58] remember who but he's just like it's just about killing your friend like i literally also got
[00:17:04] arrested recently because of that because of the evidence in that song which is awesome did you
[00:17:10] watch tiger king yet i did uh yeah it's pretty you know the first three episodes are fun and then
[00:17:18] it's like damn these people are fucking monsters but it's just it's just broad drugs right what's
[00:17:24] just saying crazy things it's about a guy there's like other cameras there there's a guy there's
[00:17:29] it's about basically if Ian had grown up in florida one of the characters is Ian this guy Joe
[00:17:34] exotic who's like a gay guy who tricked straight guys into he was like he tricked straight guys into
[00:17:39] marrying them and they all collect tigers and then there's some other bitch and there's some other
[00:17:44] bitch like killed her husband and fed him to the tigers but got away with it and then there's another
[00:17:49] and then there's some like autistic guy with a ponytail who seems like a will feral character
[00:17:54] that has who essentially sex traffics the women that work for him all these people collect giant
[00:18:00] tigers and then there's another guy who also sex trafficked they all fuck multiple people it's wild
[00:18:07] yeah but you know it's pretty the first three episodes are pretty interesting and then like
[00:18:12] you know some of them start going to jail and like it's not as fun those kind of docu series get
[00:18:18] really repetitive too after just depressing it's just not it's so many shocking you're like none
[00:18:24] of these people are real it's purely just just freak watching yeah um i mean dude oh yeah there's
[00:18:31] one scene true crime like hit its apex or whatever and then i guess is there is there any crime
[00:18:37] involved in the tiger king yeah yeah there's crime there's one lady who probably killed her
[00:18:41] husband and they go into that and then after making a murderer they kind of all just like well that's
[00:18:47] exactly right dude once they get into the crime element it's fucking boring as shit but the beginning
[00:18:51] where it's like hey check this fucking gay guy that's tricking straight methods into sucking him off and
[00:18:57] he's got a gun it's pretty funny he also sings it's there's the fun one of the funniest scenes is uh
[00:19:04] like what there's like a funeral and he starts singing he's at this kid's funeral and he
[00:19:11] his parents and family is there and he's like in a tuxedo singing about how much he loves him at the funeral he just makes it about him it's so fucking funny he's a fucking animal but that's hilarious yeah it's you know i would say watch the first couple episodes if you're bored looks like Adam is gone yeah yep no issue there we could just kind of keep rolling yeah okay now we can do the show for real let's start the show and let's start the show the real one the real all right i'll click record
[00:19:40] all right i'll click record now damn so have you have you put a shirt on at all the entire time or no uh i have to put a shirt on i put a shirt on sometimes i
[00:19:51] when it's cold i open the window and put his hoodie on to feel like i'm outside or it's winter to feel something it really isn't warming up this is fucking insane it's almost may and the
[00:20:03] should have still all right yeah i got oh what happened yeah um you got my internet cut out for a second i'm gonna be through that bitch yeah you see i'm on ethernet but then i turned off wifi and then the
[00:20:16] shut up there he goes again dumb ass dude is crazy Adam i told you i'm downloading child pornography at 3 p.m and fucking pat and Oswald was making fun of the people protesting the open the economy back up on twitter or whatever
[00:20:32] and uh you know he's like he's like all these people like and frank stayed in a house for blah blah blah blah and then you got two weeks of netflix and video games and these people were like open
[00:20:43] flood rockers or something yeah and i'm not gonna go into yes absolutely everything that's wrong with that fucking tweet but uh-huh it hit me and made me miss flood rockers on such a deep level that i can't shake that i just fucking i miss
[00:21:03] fudger in that buttery ass bun right now just with the fucking uh dude now i miss fud rockers the one pound the ostrich burger which is also good that was a nice like change
[00:21:13] change pace when you're like when i want to eat healthy yeah i have ostrich with a pile of fries and but i'm telling you dude mayonnaise one of my favorite memories well not it was actually pretty depressing but yeah i recently divorced father with no place to live and me go into
[00:21:32] the fud rockers getting the one pound burger and then playing and then playing crazy taxi yeah and that's fucking that is a day you're right dude i'm trying to think what my you're right if you think about your favorite memories with your loser father they're always so depressing
[00:21:50] terrible but i'm trying to even think of a pleasant one with my dad and i'm honestly drawing a blank oh there was a pro you know what here's a good one he let me into his like i was like seven or eight years old and he took me out of school with no nobody's permission
[00:22:09] not my mother's no reason and we went to a fucking smoky ass greek uh coffee house to watch soccer greek soccer just took me out of school to watch a game and then i got to roll with him at work which was just he stayed there for five hours
[00:22:24] and then we went to a greek restaurant and watched him and his friends try and cheat on their wives with the like 19 year old Ukrainian woman that was the waitress there they just all took turns sexually harassing her and he was like this is what being a man's like
[00:22:40] yeah that's pretty cool i guess but it's nowhere near as good as fudrockers no it's not even that's what i remember the condiment bar where it's like hey condiment bar is on everything everything you know what you do i don't even know why they had cheeseburgers on the menu because my move my genius move is always you get the regular hamburger and then you put the nacho cheese on it
[00:23:00] uh... free yes you say 25 say 25 cents on the back end yeah for a superior for a premium cheese that adds up for sure yeah you could you could you could definitely charge nacho you could charge for nacho for sure yeah they had a lot of dude they had a lot of fucking i would go buckwild on that mail they had good mail for fudrockers
[00:23:23] they'd good french fries dude there's like potato wedge french fries fuck i miss fudrocker but the thing is is fudrockers has been gone for a while i looked i looked it up years ago and they were already well at least you know what in the tri state there's none yeah in maryland there's uh there's fudrockers yeah i mean i haven't like been the fudrockers probably in
[00:23:45] ten years maybe maybe i guess i went i went in college and that at this point i haven't been since dc
[00:23:55] fudrockers they had one in china town by the movie theater that's right yeah right by the bus yeah by the bus stop yeah right by rfd shut the fuck up open mic yeah if you want to go to fudrockers now you gotta go all the way out to
[00:24:11] fudrockers um let's get to the per per per sepani so you gotta go all the way up to per sepani that's the closest one yeah open now 11 a.m. the 930 p.m. oh shit how far is per sepani dude yeah just me driving all the way out there during the apocalypse
[00:24:29] no windows on my car headband flying back you know he's a gun yeah we're we're in goggles yeah he's blasting motorhead like you're breaking quarantine i'm like yeah do you see that pat nawswell tweet they're like i did i also miss fudrockers yeah everybody there is just like yeah dude i have to be tweeted that i had to leave and go get fudrockers
[00:24:53] um fattentoo is probably like himself missing fudrockers um it's kind of like when a republican yeah i'm gonna blame this on yeah exactly it's mad about these gays yeah these people just want fudrock oh they're willing to kill somebody for
[00:25:12] ruckers yeah that's what they want they want fudrockers back is that what these people are protesting about it's like a waitress it's out of work she's like please i need to feed my family and he's like what you just what you missed the one pound hamburger is that
[00:25:27] you miss going to the condiment bar getting whatever you want they're like no what are you talking about you are right yeah i would love some fudrockers my damn self damn my back is fucked up from burpees and shit well you know i don't know just fucking just tension i guess yeah nobody's i've
[00:25:49] i've had i haven't had physical contact with another human being and fucking yeah forever so it's like because you know there is there is somebody told me that uh like muscle adhesions or whatever like the knots that you work out with like a massage therapist it's like
[00:26:06] because it's like a partially like i don't know some like parasympathetic nervous system bullshit that like just having someone you're close to massage touch your shit is almost as effective as like just going to see like a professional therapist or whatever because it's not about like the physical aspect of it's like relaxing shit that you have that's so true that sounds fake dude yeah well i don't know so much of it the idea that my muscle is like
[00:26:35] the idea that my muscle has knots and it sounds fake yeah you know it sounds more real to me i felt like it's a bunch of a bunch of wires in there i mean it is it makes sense yeah there's like the fibers adhere or something it is wires it's a little
[00:26:49] yeah it's not what a muscle fiber is but uh uh uh fuck yeah dude i've been getting limber as fuck just doing yoga yeah i just need somebody to jam their fucking thumb in there as hard as they can elbow get the elbow in there
[00:27:07] that would be a dream come true that would be nice you know i can't think i can't i don't know who where i've gotten too many nice massages girls either do it way too hard to prove something or too soft because they're women yeah i've never had a woman do it too hard and um the best massage
[00:27:25] I need to do a little last hand and it's like little pointy knives yeah but i need somebody like just fucking really just put a shit ton of pressure on my shit i don't like a general massage like a massage is never supposed to be like a relaxing thing i go when something hurts yeah and then like have somebody jam their fucking hands and knuckles in it until it relaxes yeah and then and then i feel okay and then you go back and i know i like to be i like to be fucking soothed yeah i mean i hate a hard massage i like so do you
[00:27:54] yeah i like to be soothed you give a really nice massage they're like they're like two different things almost i don't know what to tell you it's relaxing bro yeah i know i feel good when they rub down my whole body last time i got a massage he was a fucking little ass fucking rushing guy though i would prefer to be a woman i don't want to fuck them but i would like i would like oh you know what maybe i agree with the pair of social shit because in my head when a woman massages me i'm like am i about to get pussy it's like when you're in a yoga class and they readjust your position
[00:28:23] it feels so nice would you like to have a place where they go where you lay on your back and someone just squeezes your fat and your titties no i don't think so i don't think that would do much for me what about just a little bit of no no just somebody like just squeezing your stomach and
[00:28:45] grabbing pieces of it and you know shaking it out no feeding it like pizza dough like an old like an old doormat no i don't want that oh okay i like i like i said tummy rub from a woman that's about to jerk me off
[00:29:03] that's fun or post tummy or post getting jacked up or post coming i'll take a stomach rub yeah it's nice it's intimate i've never had that it sounds nice yeah because you that's that's that's fat privilege you don't know how good it feels to get just your fat
[00:29:18] i don't know that it's true it's a power move i feel like i feel like a sexual version of Santa Claus when that happens
[00:29:24] santa claus is already pretty sexual you think so oh yeah oh yeah it's one of the most sexual starts off by fucking your house he's a cock comes by the middle night that have sex with your whole house
[00:29:42] anyway has little broken cookies afterwards so he's like yeah here's $20 for your time here's some shit i had my trunk for your whole house pussy the thing i never understood about Santa Claus is like you know he wears that outfit
[00:30:00] and it's like you would think like oh well that's probably how people just dressed at a certain time and it's like no there's no evidence of that it's just some weird just weird clothes that he has and only him
[00:30:13] yeah you know what that's true what's the history behind that shit you think it's just a red has no idea it's also it's a different saint different places yeah because here at Saint Nick in Greek it's Saint Bill Saint Vesillios yeah and neither one of them were fucking wearing red so where did that shit start
[00:30:34] the way Santa Claus's look has been refined over the years he's a classy looking guy now the Coca Cola Santa yeah that's a great looking Santa Claus yeah I agree with that they don't make them like that no although although I will say they don't that doesn't seem to be a very set the new Santa Claus doesn't seem too sexual to me they've refined him too much
[00:30:59] they've they've roughed out the sexual edges to him probably yeah his big weird hat or whatever well they got rid of the penis at a certain point yeah they took his cock off hold on they took his cock because they didn't want it you know because of the PC old Santa
[00:31:19] here we go here's a guardian article that says Coca Cola didn't invent Santa wow I like you have a hood you have a red hood and that seems like fucking sinister yeah
[00:31:32] yeah I don't know are you still boring your relatives with stories about Prince Albert's tree in the origin of mistle tokus is stop the truth is what you're doing that I have no idea who the fuck knows that story
[00:31:44] yeah the guy with the cock piercing yeah he would hang his cock over the fucking doorway he invented mistle tokus that guy was a freak here we go so most of his modern image was put together by cartoonist Thomas Nast in the 1870s wow yeah who would have thought Thomas Nast nasty Nast
[00:32:07] that's where the word comes from you think Thomas Nast ever drew him with his cock out what do you think maybe sorry I'm trying to find I'm trying to find older pictures of Santa Claus
[00:32:21] yeah what did Santa Claus like in the 1700s yeah that's some shit I'd like to know alright 1800s Santa Claus I'm looking up 1700s damn Santa Claus we got a bunch of people doing research Adam it's up to you to carry the show
[00:32:36] yeah we didn't have Santa Claus in my culture what do you mean so I just have to ruin it for the other kids you know take pleasure in it
[00:32:49] yeah that does suck to you didn't have everyone looks so happy getting like their fucking hot wheels and fucking this motherfucker looks dressed in blue he's got like a Russian hat
[00:33:03] in 1700s he didn't have red clothes until the 1870s wow just like did you know that boys used to be used to wear pink and girls used to wear blue yeah and Irish people used to be considered black
[00:33:20] Irish people used to be slaves yeah they should therefore they should get to say the N right and what if that what if that happened what if nobody would have like in fucking after the Civil War
[00:33:31] like there was just like that all they all the freed slaves gathered their power and there was like another revolution in the year after the Civil War where they just rewrote history and white people were black people and black people were white people
[00:33:45] and then they erased that from the history books there was a leap year or whatever and no that sounds very like make a lot of sense on almost every level if you think about it no I mean how funny would it be like
[00:33:59] what is that like a hotel thing like the black people founded America and then brought white slaves over here is that we're saying no so the slaves so white people were slaves and they bested their black masters by flipping it on them in a year is what you're saying
[00:34:16] no so black people were slaves okay or white people were slaves and then the war happens and black people get freedom and they rewrote it so they switched it so it was actually the other way around
[00:34:31] okay wait so I'm still on the white people got freedom I don't know man
[00:34:40] I would agree that would be funny yeah that would be trippy it would be a cool movie it would be a cool movie that's all I'm saying no I agree
[00:34:55] I buy that damn hungry what are you gonna eat bro um I don't know probably a couple of activity yogurt nice Jamie Lee Curtis style and some rice pussy pH balance perf
[00:35:09] yeah some rice and activity I gotta go back to Costco I'm running out of supplies Costco was fucking packed as a bitch have you been to Costco post quarantine yeah I tried to go but it's it's
[00:35:23] it's really I at least I don't know if it's like listen New York but in they only like 50 people in at a time yeah you gotta go right before they close is that the move yeah you gotta go to 15 when you're in there
[00:35:34] because it's so quiet I tried to go in the beginning right before they open and that motherfucker was there was a line fucking around the block sucked I just didn't go I don't have any supplies bro I keep going fucking key foods and shit's expensive as hell
[00:35:49] I want to go today I want some fucking Greek some Greek chocolates Easter it's fucking Easter bro yeah Greek chocolates any chocolates it's Greek Easter off course I need chocolates why don't you just get some uh
[00:36:03] M&M's at the bodega it's not the same thing and you know what do they have instead of a bunny we gotta have like oh there's a Greek bunny as well actually you know what we do but we also it's pretty sinister because we slaughter and cook a whole lamb and we also have little chocolate
[00:36:22] little chocolate lambs sometimes oh that's nice dude a fucking roasted lamb is so goddamn good I miss Chinese food I miss going and getting dim sum me to yeah it means they should open up close reopen Chinatown in New York to prove that it's not racist
[00:36:39] that's right what you have fun and they're like only Chinese businesses are allowed to reopen to come back to combat racism those are some good businesses yeah we're only reopening the
[00:36:24] businesses yeah we're only reopening Chinese businesses are we looking down any way donating. Oh Dan get big
[00:36:34] come maybe yeah you want to go mid age ha
[00:36:26] oh oh oh oh oh oh you want to go with some aluminum God yeah I'm soDPY isn't a god damn or two
[00:36:26] always feel like a farm. How good are you I mean then mm I don't go with the
[00:36:28] It lamest so god damn good. I miss Chinese food. I miss going and getting dim sum
[00:36:33] Me too. Yeah, it means they should open up close reopen Chinatown in New York to prove that it's not racist. That's right
[00:36:41] Funny races that they're like only Chinese businesses are allowed to reopen
[00:36:51] Yeah, we're only reopening Chinese businesses
[00:36:54] That would be awesome dude, and that was that would show the virus whose boss. Yeah, how dare you to let how dare you be racist about the virus
[00:37:04] Mm-hmm. I agree. It's time to have some soup dumplings. I
[00:37:09] Agree with the second part for sure and I'm pissed that I can't have my favorite Chinese place clothes
[00:37:15] I think they got they're done fucking the xenophobia has gotten to them
[00:37:20] Yeah, and I was trying my best to keep them afloat for weeks
[00:37:24] Mm-hmm by what ordering takeout big orders. Yeah, he has a national hero
[00:37:29] Maybe I should just learn how to make soup dumplings on my own can't be that hard. It's like a gel
[00:37:34] It's like a you can buy them too. Well, I would imagine you just put soup in an ice cube tray and then make the dough
[00:37:40] And then it's like a gelatin and then when it gets hot it melts into soup
[00:37:45] Hmm interesting. Why can't you just use an ice cube tray and just freeze soup?
[00:37:50] I don't think it's frozen soup. I think it's like a gelatinous. Can I understand that?
[00:37:54] I don't think you have the finesse to make a soup. I don't know. I've never tried it
[00:37:59] It's like old Chinese ladies that have probably been doing it since they were 14 and they're 65 now I
[00:38:04] Don't think I just I don't want to be sound like a hater here
[00:38:07] But I don't believe in your ability to make a soup dumpling
[00:38:10] It said I mean I've made dumplings before
[00:38:13] No, the only difference is that it's a frozen thing that you put I mean if you made
[00:38:19] How will pinio poppers the deep fry? It's a similar process listen a fried dumpling is a different thing than a delicate beautiful soup dumpling
[00:38:26] Yeah, I think what you do is you make a very thick draw that when it cools it becomes gelatinous
[00:38:32] And then you scoop that like jelly and then you see it dumpling and then you steam it. Yeah
[00:38:38] Maybe if the skin was thick enough, but that thin skin I think would give you fits how the hell do they do that?
[00:38:45] It's incredible fuck. I want soup dumplings now. I want one maybe for Easter
[00:38:50] I should find the one remaining Chinese restaurant living a show long bow
[00:38:57] What do you what are you fucking standing up for Adam? I was just readjusting the way I was sitting my balls were uncomfortable
[00:39:05] Your little ass balls got uncomfortable little stop, huh? It's just a you we both know about the tremendous amount of skin
[00:39:14] Yeah, you do have a lot of scrotal scrotal barrier and heavy little marbles my balls are taking my my
[00:39:22] Balls have been taking a pounding with this all this yoga nice. Okay good. So I'm glad I found a recipe website
[00:39:29] That has it is you freeze it would no no it is it's a I guess I don't know if you add gelatin or what but or how that works
[00:39:36] But it's luckily it's not one of these websites that you know every other recipe website
[00:39:41] You're like one story. Yeah when my third child was diagnosed with brain cancer
[00:39:47] Just make the fried chicken, please bitch. I just want to learn how to make my own fucking popcarts at home
[00:39:52] Yeah, I really don't care about your husband cheating on you in Iraq with a 14 year old
[00:40:03] Dude they get right to the point that's China. That's the Chinese for you though. Yeah, they're not dressing it up. Yeah, you just make it
[00:40:18] Yeah, fuck just a Chinese recipe website and it's like step one hold the bat
[00:40:31] I've always hated them. Yeah, like that like Batman
[00:40:35] Yeah, like Batman a similar origin story my parents were murdered. Uh-huh. Mm-hmm
[00:40:40] And then I was swarmed by bats or something. Oh, if you had a similar origin story your superhero name would be getting pussy, man
[00:40:54] It's like worse with all the pussies on the costume mr. Wayne. He's like now my my enemies can fear what I fear
[00:41:08] Just two pocket pussies instead of ears I rewatch Batman begins the other day. He's like put something on in the background
[00:41:14] Mm-hmm, and it's it's crazy how things changed in between Batman begins and the Joker movie. Oh, yeah
[00:41:23] Well, just like what people like you could get away with making movie like Batman begins where it's like oh, there's this rich guy that's gonna come in in this city that's like
[00:41:32] Filled with corruption and circumvent the law and then he gets to be like the rich hero or whatever
[00:41:37] Yeah, no one was thinking about it in terms of politics. They were just like hell yeah Batman. Yeah, and
[00:41:42] Yeah, he has a cape. There's one scene whereas the Joker movie is like I mean equally is
[00:41:49] Kind of dumb and I really considering anything but on the other end of the spectrum, but in Batman begins when he uh
[00:41:56] When he's like he's going through the cave underneath his house or whatever like coming up with the Batcave idea
[00:42:04] Alfred says him. He's like, you know your grandfather actually was involved in underground railroad and they
[00:42:14] They say that he had slaves down here what that he kept freed slaves in the Batcave
[00:42:31] Like there's no way they weren't freeing anyone. Yeah, well, that's like the plot of the movie is that the new ceo wants to make like fucking
[00:42:44] Like, you know, it's like oh you'll fall. I wouldn't want to do this
[00:42:48] It's like what do they make anyways? This is just a fucking hedge fund. I don't like
[00:42:53] Yeah, how the fuck did he get so rich if he's not selling fucking missiles?
[00:42:56] Yeah, they don't explain what I guess the way maybe trains trains. It makes sense trains. Yeah trains in industry
[00:43:08] Uh, yeah, what a lot of it, but Morgan Freeman is like the sweet guy in
[00:43:16] There's a lot of that going on in that movie. What's yeah, the crane of his parents dying cocaine crane is the name of the psychiatrist
[00:43:24] Oh, yeah, the scarecrow is named. Oh, that's right. Crane, Bane. That guy's good. Chilean Murphy. She got more work
[00:43:30] You know, that's not how you say his name, bitch
[00:43:36] You know, it's not chilean. They say that in Ireland. That's how it's
[00:43:42] Well, hold on now. I mean, it's like is the Joker also got a one of those style of names
[00:43:48] What's the Joker's name? It's some WAP shit, right? His name's lane
[00:43:56] This is a joker's no what the fuck is the joker's name in the movie?
[00:43:59] Arthur it was like an Italian name in the jack Nicholson one. He's like a he's like a WAP gang
[00:44:14] What's the joker's real identity? Yeah, I don't know. I didn't even like those Tim Burton movies as a kid
[00:44:19] No, as a kid you didn't like them shut up. No, I didn't I thought Batman was gay
[00:44:27] That was okay, but I said the Tim Burton movies I didn't like yeah, but as a kid if you like one thing you like it all
[00:44:37] You don't know the although I guess that's not true because I thought I thought the lowest in Clark show was kind of butt cheeks
[00:44:42] And I like Superman. I thought it was cool
[00:44:44] But I did want to fuck Terry Hatcher. Terry Hatcher is a piece of ace
[00:44:47] The Superman animated show is pretty good too. Yeah, that's I like that one
[00:44:52] I was a Superman guy. My little brother was a Batman guy. Yeah. Oh, you're like Shaquille O'Neal. I did. Yep, and I also like Shaquille O'Neal
[00:45:01] So at the same time it was all coming together very cool
[00:45:04] But yeah, my brother loved Batman and Peter Pan actually we watched Peter Pan a lot. Yeah
[00:45:13] No, yeah, that movie Peter Pan is all where you could be a boy forever. Yeah, I guess that's literally true
[00:45:20] The whole story of Peter Pan is like dealing with like traumatic like sexual molestation
[00:45:26] Captain book is definitely molesting everyone. Yes. That's why Michael world in your head Michael identified
[00:45:32] So just think just think positive thoughts
[00:45:36] Oh no, you're right. Think happy thoughts. Yeah, it's about just
[00:45:39] Pretending you're playing cat. Just said it get it. Yeah, and then you can fly away from wherever you are
[00:45:48] Don't they have a stepdad to in the movie aren't there like the three kids? It's like the fucking shitty stepdad
[00:45:54] Uh robin williams. I mean, no, no, that's hook. That's not Peter Pan
[00:45:57] Yeah, we should fucking auto complete in uh in safari where I just want to type in peter pan and it adds boss at the end for no reason
[00:46:09] Because they know they know you love fucking transportation. They know I love transportation
[00:46:13] They know you like get it from one from point a to point b
[00:46:16] All right, let's see the peter pan always always
[00:46:18] It's all I always get surprised when there's so many like there's like that weird like indian subplot
[00:46:24] Of peter pan the movie. Oh the native of man. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
[00:46:29] I was confused when you said that oh, yeah, what's fucking kormak bakarsi wrote the book. Oh, yeah
[00:46:39] It's about I thought I thought you meant people from indian nuts uh sappages. No
[00:46:50] Yeah, that's a lot of that going on. Yeah, a lot of Georgian mary
[00:46:55] Apparently they got the rona bat right now who the the over in indian country
[00:47:01] Mm-hmm. Damn. That's fucked. Well, I guess not india
[00:47:05] But the cure for the native coronaviruses and putting the first people on your forehead
[00:47:18] Yeah, I guess the answer isn't putting a dot on your forehead
[00:47:45] After six times. Uh, michael eric dyson just
[00:47:50] There wasn't the funniest intellectuals on that show
[00:48:00] Every time I saw him on tv. I I think he was I like his shit vacuum guy
[00:48:05] No, he's some some black professor that's
[00:48:09] He's like he's he's one of those break it down kind of guys. Nice. It's really like
[00:48:14] I don't know who that is. I don't know you're sounding racist
[00:48:18] Yeah, I'm you're sounding racist right now. I know I know he's one of those break it
[00:48:23] He's one of those breakdance and type professors, you know, he's one of those he's a professor of driving
[00:48:30] At the university of north carat. He's always doing his job. No, I think he was at george town. I think
[00:48:38] I don't know why I brought it michael. He's got corona real bad. I just love just go marjous fucking
[00:48:49] It's all over the world, but he singles out india
[00:48:53] Only some muslims could get it too. Yeah, maybe you could come back as the virus in your dumb religion
[00:49:05] Maybe you should call too bad tech support can't fix this virus sanji. Yeah
[00:49:17] Maybe if you all didn't work in a call center, this wouldn't be a problem
[00:49:21] That's true just a saying unrelated stereotypes
[00:49:33] I started photo shopping the other day. It wasn't really worth it
[00:49:35] But the cover of the movie romeo must die
[00:49:40] And then jettles jettles just got an indian guy's face
[00:49:44] That's really good. But it's he's getting ready to call people on the roe moustiles really
[00:49:49] So he's like posed, you know, like jettly
[00:49:52] Indian guy getting ready to hit on girls. Yes, sir
[00:50:04] Yeah, look at the cover for romeo must die. I know I see it in my mind's eye right now. I remember that shit
[00:50:11] That was a song with the elite with the elia music video, right?
[00:50:14] Alia was the love interest. Mm-hmm. Yeah
[00:50:17] Talk about speaking of getting molested. That's a tough draw for alia
[00:50:24] R Kelly. Yeah, she got married molested and then they made a song called a chain nothing but
[00:50:37] Oh, that's so funny the other thing. Oh, I was again started
[00:50:40] We're keeping on the molested thing, but I watched china town directed by child rapist roman polanski
[00:50:46] That's a great movie good movie dude. I'm one of the best put china town on after this
[00:50:50] I kind of want to rewatch it must really good. Yeah, I might I might I have to bike over to auto zone afterwards
[00:50:57] Getting the zoom suck my dick get in the hole
[00:51:01] Fuck so that man just raped the kid and then he got to go to france and keep raping
[00:51:05] Yeah, because he was sad about his wife being killed by Charles Manson
[00:51:09] So he had to go rape a kid in a jacuzzi. That's fuck somebody should fucking yeah
[00:51:18] You know the french in france. It's not
[00:51:21] Yeah, I know it's barely a crime in france in france. They get a part you get a ticket
[00:51:25] You get a ticket from child molestation. It's a type of a sex is a rap
[00:51:33] You have a child pornography. Mm-hmm. That's what you think french kissing is
[00:51:45] Yeah, it would be cool if somebody raped him. I guess little i-roman
[00:51:51] You know, maybe maybe if a child raped him
[00:51:54] He learned his lesson. It's not a long life
[00:51:59] Really? Yeah, well him and magnito have the same story. Yeah, that's true
[00:52:06] You're in the holocaust to become an evil genius
[00:52:12] Damn patrick stewards. I can't you just rape boys like the good like the heroes
[00:52:19] Like a hollywood hero and like me and Ian mccallen
[00:52:33] Their best friend is a bono Patrick straight. I thought and then guess what they bonded over
[00:52:40] Children acting their love of the craft maybe or maybe it was my last thing children
[00:52:45] Being british footy maybe maybe it's time to lose the dot
[00:52:57] He just delivers eight versions of his monologue back to back to back and then says the n-word
[00:53:12] Damn hilarious guy. Yeah bill billy boy mar
[00:53:21] Uh like tv show and it's like stop bro. Yeah, that's bullshit. It's too late the internet to us
[00:53:26] Yeah, you don't get to be on the internet. It's too late for old hollywood
[00:53:30] Yeah, that's just like snl is just doing shittier versions of people that do good
[00:53:35] Yeah, fucking online comedy. I mean the only thing I saw was that clip of uh
[00:53:43] It's like what are you even doing bro? Yeah, that's him. You should be you should be embarrassed
[00:53:48] You know, can you imagine the kind of person that's watching that and they're like, yes
[00:53:56] Lack humor to them is completely a way to signal what they fucking
[00:54:01] I what they know what they know and should yeah, I know that thing
[00:54:07] Gensburg the dumb bitch that didn't retire and now trump and now it's our fault somehow that trump is going to
[00:54:14] Get to replace her. Yeah. Yeah, kiwbi is already failing
[00:54:19] That was one of the dumbest ideas i've ever heard
[00:54:21] It's the stupidest fucking idea and the amount of money that they got for that thing
[00:54:26] Yeah, well good good on the people that finesse them out of i mean, yeah, shout out to everybody got a check out of it
[00:54:32] Yeah, but I remember but they didn't they didn't they the way everything the way everything was fucking produced on kiwbi
[00:54:39] Like there's not a single fucking like union contract all the work is supposed to be like low budget
[00:54:45] Something they're fucked over everybody. Yeah. Yeah
[00:54:49] Well, then fuck them. Is it mbc or cbs? No, it's I think it's a guy used to run nbc or some shit
[00:54:55] Yeah, I mean watching these people panic and realize that they like didn't
[00:55:01] Didn't prepare for the future at all. Wait, it's a platform only for your phone. It's that the it's a mobile only content
[00:55:11] Everything that works is cross platform. That's the thing but they're so dumb
[00:55:15] Why would you put a fucking like artificial limiting limit to where you can fucking get your shit viewed?
[00:55:21] Yeah, I can not see this on my TV. It's also the way everything works is people screen cap things and they fucking like share clips from stuff
[00:55:29] And then distributed on social media you get like free word of mouth advertising
[00:55:33] But they have it so like like we want to make sure no one can even screen cap the phone or screen record to protect all of our content
[00:55:43] Nobody's talking about it. There's no way to talk about the most like
[00:55:46] Intuitive way to share something on your phone that you're watching is to just screen cap it and then post the screen cap
[00:55:52] Yeah, but if you have all that money put some of it out there for free you dumb assholes let people fucking talk about it. Yeah, I
[00:55:59] Mean I guess they probably have like free trials or whatever and then you know
[00:56:03] Be there and then you forget about this the same thing that happened with fucking apple TV
[00:56:08] Plus or whatever which is incredibly easy to accidentally click on on your apple TV, right?
[00:56:13] And then it's like oh, yeah, it's a trial. You're already doing it and check this out
[00:56:16] You know and you're like what the fuck cuz I got build for it for like three months
[00:56:19] I was like why am I paying for apple TV? I didn't even know what it is to watch the Steve Carell Matt Lauer rape show
[00:56:26] Yeah, that clips that issue being like I didn't rape anybody
[00:56:33] Twice I might I might honestly I might cancel absolutely everything and just go back to DVDs I
[00:56:39] Would respect that because it's like I'm never fucking watching anything anyways anytime. I get a DVD
[00:56:44] I watch it like five times. Yeah, it's so we're back to the torrenting actually
[00:56:49] I've been torrenting. Yeah, I mean there's also that yeah, just torrenting dark web
[00:56:56] Dude, I want to be on the scene though. There's door door for it's kind of guys. What can I get pills from the Silk Road?
[00:57:02] Mm-hmm. I've been sober for yeah two weeks. It sucks. I know I know I have a buddy that's yeah
[00:57:18] Yeah, to do punked to do a seven minute version of punked right chance the rapper
[00:57:26] That guy sucks bro chance the rapper I didn't know that apparently like his dad is best friends with Obama or something
[00:57:33] Yeah, he's like some fucking he's like a go elite guy
[00:57:38] He's not like it's not like an independent rapper that just got big well, I just don't like him because I watched that Netflix show where it's like
[00:57:44] Yeah, him and Jesse Smollett and Barack Obama used to have
[00:57:49] Chicago elite a lot of a lot of rumors going around from confirmed insiders
[00:57:55] They smoke that their boyfriends with each other and that they
[00:58:01] They're having sex for money with each other. I actually heard yeah, they were
[00:58:04] During the Benghazi attacks they would they would they had one $20 bill that they kept passing around to all sucking each other off
[00:58:12] In a limousine during their while Ben Gazi was happening chance the rapper and Barack Obama Jesse Smollett
[00:58:23] Did you I don't know if this is true at all obviously I didn't click the link
[00:58:27] But I saw a couple people share something that said Jesse Smollett was fucking the big Nigerian guys I
[00:58:34] Mean wasn't that the implication to begin with yeah, why not?
[00:58:38] I think they were just they knew him from the gym and they were training
[00:58:41] There was something it was like he knew them from a bath house also hell yeah, dude
[00:58:45] But that doesn't matter. I mean it's like who gives a shit. That's the thing that's annoying is that like funny
[00:58:50] It's just a funny little extra element. Yeah, it is funny, but it's like this is not like conservatives like fuck up like
[00:58:55] When they if and when they are right about something they'll add extra shit and they go the wrong way with it
[00:59:05] Why you think they were onto something before they were right about pizza game
[00:59:10] Yeah, I mean they were right about the fucking
[00:59:12] Really? Pizza game pizza game was an exclusive QAnon thing. Yeah sure they got a
[00:59:19] They got a lot of it right about pizza game everyone knew that these people were child ballester. Yeah, what are you looking at?
[00:59:28] Well, you know what I mean like that's that's a conspiracy theory that if you're a conspiracy theorist
[00:59:34] No a lot of people discredited there was like very few people were on board with any of that shit at all until
[00:59:41] When I say everybody I mean everyone that's a conspiracy theorist
[00:59:45] They got that one right because that's the conspiracy theory that that was right
[00:59:53] Whoever people would talk about lizard people all the time. Well, that's real too
[00:59:58] That's right. I don't mean it was like mainstream in the fucking news media
[01:00:03] Because it's still people pretend it's not I
[01:00:09] What do you we was everybody fucking checking out? Yes, sir. My sister said that um
[01:00:22] Why do you get this? He's like they're just saying that to keep men away
[01:00:28] Why would that first ball why would they what do you mean cheap men away?
[01:00:35] The logic there is insane keep men away from what?
[01:00:38] It's it's almost as if he has this concept that if a woman says she's lesbian
[01:00:45] She's just trying not to be bothered by men. Yeah, it was secretly
[01:00:50] She just ain't had the right dick yet. Mm-hmm. It's true
[01:00:54] Well, he's not very funny. He's not entirely wrong in that regard. I guess so
[01:01:00] Anyway, so you were saying QAnon was right about everything Adam
[01:01:03] Uh, no, I mean that there were pedophiles in pedophile elites, but then they got carried away with
[01:01:12] Yeah, well, I mean there. I mean more. I mean more stuff like uh
[01:01:22] But like the colengton catholic thing where initially they were like these kids didn't do anything wrong
[01:01:27] And then the full video comes out and it's like yeah, that's really way more on the black
[01:01:34] But then republicans are like and also indians are fags
[01:01:43] At the first part the guy didn't go to Vietnam, right? Yeah, you didn't go to Vietnam. I totally forgot about that
[01:01:48] Yeah, that was a big W. You're right. That was yeah
[01:01:52] He was like I remember when I was in the Vietnam time in the service. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah in the Vietnam times
[01:01:59] What do they think that the john gef kennedy's alive the john john f Kennedy jr's alive
[01:02:07] They think there was some weird kennedy family shit recently. We're like
[01:02:11] Just a woman and her son drowned in the pedomics or the yellow
[01:02:15] Oh, yeah, they were kayaking right. Yeah, it was like something like either. Yeah, either like outside dc either
[01:02:22] Robert kennedy's granddaughter. I think yeah
[01:02:25] Maybe I'm died. She went kayaking she was in quarantine with her kid. Yeah, and they found her in like the canal or something
[01:02:34] Those motherfuckers really are cursed. Yeah
[01:02:38] Are they are they cursed or are they part of a secret?
[01:02:42] This is the thing is like we could just have royals and then they could do all this openly and then it wouldn't be creepy
[01:02:52] Because it's not they wouldn't allow catholics because it's not built on the same principle. Look. What do you mean?
[01:03:00] I mean every president because they're their families
[01:03:02] But their family's body if their families with money and power. I mean they just happen to be catholic
[01:03:07] There's like plenty of like jews at the upper level and they're I don't know about you
[01:03:10] They wouldn't let us that's the point. They're equally innocent. I mean the the what is it?
[01:03:15] They're Ross Childs and the Epstein's in the Friedlands. They're all these powerful
[01:03:20] Don't go jewish families. They're always downplay. I wish what degree
[01:03:26] To what degree they're involved in anything
[01:03:30] That is true. You'll have the royals and then you have who's behind the royals
[01:03:36] The fucker the Roth child's that shit is so weird to me that that's like a
[01:03:41] Isn't that a fan that those motherfuckers go back to like the 1100s or some shit
[01:03:45] Mm-hmm. Yeah, they're like French bankers. That shit is crazy and that they're still around and that's some fucked up shit
[01:03:55] No, that's fucked never lost. What a streak
[01:03:59] How do they get away around the Holocaust thing if they're they're French no
[01:04:03] They figured it out dude. Maybe they were maybe they were behind it
[01:04:08] Maybe they need a little juice to get Israel going
[01:04:10] Mm-hmm. They're like eight off listen buddy. We got a proposal for you and he was like this is horrible
[01:04:28] That would be just a big just a possibility it's just a possibility
[01:04:31] It'd be funny when they eventually bring professional sports back
[01:04:35] Like all the athletes have been doing nothing and then you go to watch NBA and they're all 400 pounds
[01:04:39] No, I think they're getting so it's dude. It's all just fat. Okay. Yeah, sorry. Yeah, you're right. That wouldn't happen at him
[01:04:48] No, they are I know I I apologize for saying a funny thing that might happen. You're right
[01:04:59] Let's go back to say let's go. I do it. So they come back. They're fat
[01:05:02] No, don't come on bro. Come on. You couldn't finish. I'm sorry. I got excited
[01:05:14] They're not also saying a stupid thing. It's not even like you didn't even interrupt for a fact
[01:05:19] You just interrupt. They are they stopped one interesting. They stopped drug testing everyone's gonna be doing steroids
[01:05:25] No, they stopped drug to this league of fucking they could puff the gans
[01:05:31] Yeah, but I mean they're gonna have to have some fucking training time
[01:05:35] Yeah, but they're talking about sports coming back with no
[01:05:37] Fancy it is funny that you have to put steroids in your ass because it seems like couldn't you just put it in your fucking arm
[01:05:42] It was probably the gay guys started doing steroids first
[01:05:45] And then they're like then straight guys are like, what are all these fucking gay guys doing?
[01:05:50] And they're like, yeah, it's like you just take the test offs around you inject it directly into your ass
[01:05:55] Here, I'll show you I'll show you and then straight guys started doing it and none of them were like
[01:06:05] You really have to put it in your ass now this guy Troy at the gym showed me how to do it in the shower track marks
[01:06:13] Yeah, apparently it works better if you get it massaged for about 45 minutes with baby oil but hope beforehand
[01:06:21] You gotta be wearing specific underwear where you can see your penis you gotta wear a banana hammock
[01:06:26] How about a petafile referring to a hot baby is a real lady Gaga
[01:06:49] It's pretty cool watching that locksmith open up that lock and get the fucking it's cool how that works
[01:06:54] I thought you did it with the string no I got into the car and then I took the lock out of the door
[01:07:00] And then I fucking took the lock to a locksmith and they had to open the lock
[01:07:05] And then they take the pins and then cut a new key from the pins
[01:07:12] That is fucking tight. So locksmith is open
[01:07:15] Auto zone is open. These are all essential businesses. Oh my spots are open. That's beautiful because I'm an essential person
[01:07:23] I'm an essential consumer in this world
[01:07:29] Like some cafe that one of your friends told you about that's supposed to be the best
[01:07:33] What are you talking about? That's closed
[01:07:36] You high that up too much about me going to places all of the places
[01:07:40] I love doing shit like that. You know, I don't
[01:07:43] Sometimes to eat a nice food you love it
[01:07:48] And then going talking about how good it is and then over weeks trying to phase out the person that told you about it
[01:07:55] And it becomes the place you tell people no, I would not do that
[01:07:59] You would give credit work. Yes. Yes, the first couple times you give credit and then eventually you're like, oh, yeah, that's my spot
[01:08:06] Yeah, I won't try to take you guys to one of my spots again
[01:08:10] Don't worry. I'm not gonna burden you with my spot
[01:08:13] I'm not saying I'm just saying you love doing that. I didn't make a judge
[01:08:18] I like I like haven't I like going play whenever when you went and harassed the actor from the sopranos
[01:08:25] I didn't harass him. I went to go see his band play uncle june. Mm. Then you harass and it was very charming
[01:08:31] I want anyone could go do that. Anyone could go do that. I think they play on friday morning
[01:08:39] Fuck dude if I oh my god if he dies and I never get to see him sing
[01:08:43] Don't be the way at an easy beautiful voice next time we all go
[01:08:47] Auto zone. Oh, you brought that up and then you want to allow me?
[01:08:50] Home Depot did it still open. I was I was picked up
[01:08:54] Defaunees and red hook still open. Defaunte is open. Yeah, but you're not all the restaurants are just doing carryout
[01:09:01] You're not you're not allowed to go to the faunees. I've been to the faunte's. I went with you
[01:09:07] I'm saying that you're not going to the faunte. Yeah, Adam's too gay to go into your restaurant. That's bullshit. Well, okay. Goodbye
[01:09:14] I got recognized at the faunees and uh one of the great ones in my life. I don't know some guy
[01:09:22] No, some guy who's getting a who's getting a sandwich. I love this shit
[01:09:26] I love that you bit about Hillary Clinton getting the fucking executed
[01:09:31] Yeah, let me get an egg of poloncio shianti
[01:09:39] Those eggs those egg sandwiches they have there are banging. Hey, yo, are you fucking extremely online guy? Whoa?
[01:09:50] That's probably I figured that's probably the the the rudest response to a woman saying she loves you is the sopranos. Whoa
[01:10:05] Damn, I want to try it. I've sampled all of them. Yeah. Whoa
[01:10:11] Yeah, hey, I think I have feelings you oh
[01:10:19] Oh, oh, hey, I don't want to fucking hear this shit
[01:10:22] Come on come on the fuck is the matter with you
[01:10:28] The fuck is wrong with you. I'm trying to talk about fat basketball players over here on my show
[01:10:36] You fucking bitch. I should I should shave my mustache again
[01:10:42] Whatever you're doing. I love that. I know it's a great way to get you that way without your hand there
[01:10:50] If I could get the the part of my mustache directly over by nose to go up around my nose like it is now
[01:10:58] Oh, that's gonna be like a little like a tie like a bow. Yeah, like up here like a bow and zano. Yeah like that
[01:11:06] Yeah, you could you easily could do brush your beard Nick. Uh, yeah, you gotta brush
[01:11:12] You have to brush it with one of those you hold like a comb that you hold like this, right
[01:11:17] What like without a handle comb now use a little wooden you wouldn't brush or
[01:11:26] Yeah, like that black guys get waves. Oh like a Boris hair brush. Yeah, sometimes I use those but there it's like it doesn't really
[01:11:34] Yeah, I don't know what that does. There's nothing to push against it. The wooden one is uh
[01:11:39] The wood one's good. You need some kind of fucking pork or some shit
[01:11:42] Mm-hmm. Yeah, you just you oil up a wooden comb and just go through it
[01:11:47] Use like a wide tooth one and then because in the morning it's all pressed against my fucking face. You know
[01:11:54] Yeah, like mad at against my face and shit. You gotta brush it out. You got a bleep beard oils
[01:11:59] You have to I mean it's my skin will fucking dry the fuck out
[01:12:04] Elders used to use fucking olive oil in his hair. Yeah olive oil works
[01:12:09] Smells good too before I before I because when I started growing the beard
[01:12:13] I was like I just wasn't shaving my face and I started just use coconut oil in the kitchen
[01:12:18] But that probably works fine. I just now I just use whatever is on Amazon
[01:12:22] Yeah, I just typed in beard oil and bought the the thing that was like recommended because it doesn't matter
[01:12:28] It's all the same fucking ingredients. It's just oil
[01:12:31] You have a coat of smells good. You smell delicious. Yeah
[01:12:35] I'm about to just start rubbing that shit on my skin. Yeah right now
[01:12:38] Maybe I use it to maybe maybe promotes hair growth. Yeah, so I get Rogaine. Is it too late?
[01:12:44] No, it's not too late, dude. Try it out. Who knows? That's the best tone. That's the worst tone you could ever have
[01:12:53] Your hair looks fuller than I would have imagined grown up
[01:12:57] Dude, I just want I'm just pissed how long it's gonna take to grow out. Yeah, just let it go. You know, we're not going anywhere
[01:13:04] I know but when are we though, dude? This sucks
[01:13:07] This is this is supposed to go on forever. That's the whole premise of the thing
[01:13:12] No, it's not. Well, the whole point of social distancing or the lockdowns is that we can't leave until there's a vaccine
[01:13:19] A vaccine? Well, because the whole the whole idea or at least that's what they said
[01:13:23] I thought widespread testing so you know testing and tracing
[01:13:28] What they said was is that the lockdowns and social distancing will not
[01:13:33] Reduce the overall number of infections. It just prevents the hospitals from being overwhelmed, right?
[01:13:39] So it'll still be the total number of cases
[01:13:54] Got other systems. I don't know if you know there's also no evidence now that having the disease gives you immunity later
[01:14:00] Yeah, that's what I've heard too. Yeah, which sucks
[01:14:04] That's what I was really hoping is that I accidentally had it and didn't know. Yeah, so you can get it again
[01:14:13] That's one of the gay things I've ever heard in my life. Yeah, so it's like, you know
[01:14:21] So we're just gonna be in our houses until 2021
[01:14:26] Well, that was like before when this thing started. They're like we need to social distance. We need to lockdown. It's like
[01:14:32] I guess everyone just assumed that they meant for a couple of weeks because I talked to Ian
[01:14:36] He's like it's just gonna be two weeks, right? And I was like no like months and months and months
[01:14:45] The whole idea again is that there's supposed to be like a a total number of cases, right?
[01:14:50] That you needed and you can either let everyone get infected and we just hit that number immediately in the hospitals are
[01:14:58] And extra people died and should have or use social distance and slow the rate of infection down so that the hospitals aren't overwhelmed
[01:15:06] But but the level you slow that rate of infection is down
[01:15:09] It's like so you can either have all the cases and this that's where that chart is with that huge
[01:15:14] You know all the cases this amount of time or you can have it in this amount of time
[01:15:17] It says that there's never any label on that x-axis
[01:15:20] Either your dick or my dick. Yeah, mine dick much taller than yours. No, we don't know why
[01:15:27] Just flattened and dispersing into your giant fat body
[01:15:32] Is that correct? No, no, I mean like length wise. Yes the length
[01:15:36] It's not it's not there's not two axes in this measurement. Mm-hmm. It's only the one at the x-axis not the y
[01:15:44] Yeah, I mean for the purposes of my this my what I'm saying and well, I don't know but
[01:15:49] Yeah, if you if you ended the lockdowns like theoretically you should just immediately see the same spike that you would have
[01:15:57] If you hadn't had done the lockdowns at all
[01:16:01] Shouldn't it be a little smaller a little but it would be marginal because it's like again
[01:16:05] It's like this is it's supposed to be super contagious and have like a super high fatality, right? So it's like
[01:16:17] Assuming the antibodies is like real thing
[01:16:20] And for the most part you're immune after you get it
[01:16:23] Then we have to wait for a certain portion of the population to get it before
[01:16:28] Well, there was one there was that there was one test in stanford
[01:16:32] Where they tested a or like a random sample of the population and it was like it says that the case rate is something like 50 to 85
[01:16:41] Times higher that would be that would be great news
[01:16:43] Well, that's what yeah because it means the fatality rate of the disease is actually like right back down to where it was
[01:16:49] When people were saying it was similar to the flu
[01:16:55] It would like the stanford study kind of indicates that this thing is no worse than the flu
[01:17:01] It's that we made an assumption that cases like
[01:17:06] Um, but I mean I'm not getting into that argument. Yeah, I don't want to
[01:17:10] Yeah, who cares? I don't know who cares. Yeah. All right. I just want to get some
[01:17:19] Over us in our form, but I would like to get ahead stand up is absolutely gone
[01:17:24] Lockdowns must continue forever unless you just want to move to texas and be a comedian there because they'll probably just reopen everything
[01:17:31] And then you could go back. There's a lot texas is good for comedy
[01:17:34] That's true. It's there's a lot of it's like a whole fucking country. You get a ranch. I get a ranch
[01:17:40] You could just do texas in florida. Fuck it. There's a lot of guys that do that
[01:17:46] There's probably a couple comics who haven't really been affected because they just they're on the china man for sure
[01:17:52] Maybe he was that initially some pro people protesting
[01:17:56] Because they don't understand that he's not actually chinese
[01:18:00] But i'm sure the china man is doing fine
[01:18:02] He's just doing tampa that guy coolade. Yeah
[01:18:07] I will i would be surprised if he's still alive
[01:18:13] Um, he's a guy we've talked about before way back in the day or maybe me and nick just talked about him off mike
[01:18:19] Yeah, he's a comic from the road at him life. You've never known
[01:18:24] Listen adam sometimes this conversation is gonna veer into a couple things you don't understand
[01:18:28] Okay, the road be being a real new yorker. Yeah, so there's two things that you don't actually know about that
[01:18:34] We apologize if eventually and we'll come back to stuff you can also you don't even support the yanks bro
[01:18:41] I'm a Mets fan. Oh, you're a Mets. I'm from queens. So you're just jewish
[01:18:48] I actually was always a Mets fan. I don't know why they were always my nl team because i'm just i kind of was always
[01:18:53] Have a soft spot for them because I could never be a fucking yankies fan, but I liked mike piazza and that was a cool team and
[01:18:59] Gonna city feels also really nice. Yeah
[01:19:03] It's a great who news maybe maybe bait, you know 11 12 year old me and you one day i'd be destined to live in queens
[01:19:09] And I would be I would be in fucking match country
[01:19:20] So she cannot get hard is that a greek Easter song? No, it's Italian. Oh
[01:19:29] I'm gonna celebrate by maybe ordering greek food and watching
[01:19:34] Z-z i'm so hungry. I want lamb now too, and I want fucking little chocolates and I want fucking naked. I went to the bees
[01:19:43] I cut you out. No, it's all right. I'm we went to the bz in brooklyn. There's a
[01:19:47] They yeah, I heard I heard it on piss because they took the a team to run the new spot
[01:19:52] It was pretty good some dumb bitch. You fucks up every order
[01:19:56] It was pretty good. Yeah, but when you were to the greek fries so many fries the greek fries are bullshit
[01:20:03] They're both not meant to be toasted. I agree. That's something to get the gringos get the fucking yeah greek fries
[01:20:09] You can you can uh miss me with that next time i'm gonna miss you with greek fries because feta's supposed to be cold
[01:20:15] You don't fucking toast feta. That's shit. I love that. I'm getting cranky. I need to eat something. Yeah, I'm gonna have a
[01:20:20] I'm fucking i'm so hungry right now. All right, buddy. I have a little snack for you, dude. Yeah, what is it your penis? It's
[01:20:34] Is it sausage? It's not it is not exactly so i shaped like it
[01:20:44] It's like a Vienna sauce like a vianna sauce like a bratwurst. It's like a Vienna sausage
[01:20:49] It's like a cooked bratwurst not the uncooked it's cooked so it like kind of
[01:20:53] It's like twisted and there's like a little it loses a little yeah
[01:20:57] It's like a cooked one that you poked and it kind of like so the juices kind of flow flew out a little bit out of the side of it
[01:21:17] And I don't want it so even in your even in your trick you fucked up
[01:21:23] I'm going to trick you in the second my dick and i'm still going to do a terrible job of selling it
[01:21:27] Well, I didn't want to lie to you. Yeah, I was going to be honest, but you already are lying. I'm not it's equivocating. There's a difference
[01:21:37] All right, folks. Happy Greek Easter. Happy Greek Easter everybody. See you take care brothers