[00:00:00] some other

[00:00:19] worldually

[00:00:22] that Livin and articles

[00:00:27] Can't suck if you can't come in and suck the dick fast. You gotta suck it down slowly

[00:00:34] I've never seen that movie and I never had five movies

[00:00:40] Cruz had a suck dick explained to Sean Penn how to suck

[00:00:46] Was it an IM Sam no no is that where he teaches him no he got a sucked dick down slow not in I am Sam

[00:00:54] I think he is not he's the manager the guy selling him velcro shoes

[00:00:59] Yeah

[00:01:04] Clear out you gotta put the shoes on slow

[00:01:11] You put the shoes on too fast you embarrass yourself

[00:01:15] The thing is retar they got special shoes that they wear

[00:01:24] You gotta put them on slow

[00:01:26] They try to put them on too fast get excited

[00:01:28] You get a chance up in the poor boys last hole. Yeah, you hear that listen just listen to the sound of that

[00:01:33] He's just undoing and refastening the velcro

[00:01:35] 18 100 hooks on each strap

[00:01:44] Real closer than he or each one connecting disconnect

[00:01:49] That's how that's a sound that's a sound of a shoe being fastened

[00:01:55] That's right mm-hmm that is correct. Yeah, it's gaming gone in 60 seconds explaining how to steal cars never seen that either

[00:02:03] He's the older thief respect Nicholas Cage is the leader of the crew mm-hmm the young hot piece of ass

[00:02:09] Yeah, Robert de Vollum's the shop that the chop shop that they bring all the course

[00:02:14] They bring all the the cars to and he's sitting there and he's listening to

[00:02:19] Listening I guess like old lomon

[00:02:22] You know radio on the radio. Yeah, just listening to the sound of engines

[00:02:26] Respect yeah

[00:02:28] Yeah, where they go around the track there to make the turns people make time

[00:02:35] Yeah, you have to make the turn slow you come all right you go too fast

[00:02:40] You know hit the wall like one of them retard boys trying to buy a shoe on velcro too fast trying to put on his shoes

[00:02:45] It's too slow

[00:02:48] Is too slow or too fast that's my Nicholas King. That's pretty good

[00:02:53] No, he's got eyes so the retard's putting his clothes on too fast let me understand what you're saying

[00:03:08] I'm a retard and putting my shoes too fast

[00:03:10] That's very good. That's very good

[00:03:17] Wow a real professional

[00:03:21] They're too fast

[00:03:24] I'm going to suck his cock off. Yeah, anyone

[00:03:29] Will suck his cock off

[00:03:31] That's right that is correct well, I can't believe it's 2021. Yeah put my penis down

[00:03:44] This down put the penis down

[00:03:47] Open your mouth just trying to get back to my daughter. I bought her this dildo for a birthday

[00:03:53] She's six years old when I got one I went into prison. She was three. She's 17 now bought her a dildo

[00:03:59] I figure she's old enough down for a big big nice long sloppy dildo

[00:04:07] That would be the first thing if I got out of jail put the dildo down

[00:04:10] You gotta put the dildo down slow you gotta get you all he wants is his dildo back

[00:04:15] I would not be I would not be Robert Devole is probably wedged into con air somewhere. He should be he's living in one of those houses in that weird new queer town

[00:04:28] The father of the the child that's the Bishami doesn't Bishami's having tea

[00:04:33] Yeah, and do balls in a kitchen doing dishes and a model home

[00:04:37] He's looking out the kitchen window. He's like you gotta try and fuck the kids slowly

[00:04:45] That's correct. Yeah, that is correct. Just his weird squint and his dumb bald head

[00:04:54] It'd be good to be like Robert Devole who's looked old from like the age of

[00:05:01] But looking back in it. He's always looked handsome

[00:05:03] He's a good looking he's like Terry Bradshaw and then he went smooth bald when he was like 20 you know what I mean?

[00:05:10] Mm-hmm, and so

[00:05:12] Like he's had he's looked old because he's just massively

[00:05:17] Right, right whereas Jean Hackman has always looked old that's sure you knew he looked at the Walter math

[00:05:23] Out looked the same age for like 200. Yeah, that's true my man in Pelham one two three looked old as fuck

[00:05:31] He's so funny in that movie

[00:05:33] Oh train stolen. Oh, yeah, I guess all look into it

[00:05:38] Yeah, you know what he's doing a lot if I'm on my break type stuff

[00:05:50] These two bullets on a grassy no overlooking a herd of guns the baby bull says hey pop

[00:05:56] Let's run down and

[00:05:58] Up on those cows the pop the bull says no son. Let's walk down

[00:06:10] That's the truth I love when my dad tells me

[00:06:18] You gotta you gotta find a YouTube clip slow

[00:06:21] You do glibber says slow like but I don't think he ever actually says that

[00:06:27] It's not like it's just

[00:06:30] Yeah, I see him. I've never seen most of these movies. Yeah, it's early on when he's explaining the cold trickle

[00:06:39] Uh-huh my name is dick trickle

[00:06:44] When he's like you know you indie boss coming here on your to you to

[00:06:48] You know you're too you're too hot your hot boys

[00:06:53] Sexy you're too hot. It's from California. Yo, we California boys come in there come down here on your to sexy

[00:07:01] Yeah, the sea to what you penis through the rain when we're going when we watch you in the race car

[00:07:05] We can't stop thinking about how sexy you are. It's not about driving the car

[00:07:09] So you just we used to be you trying to get people to want to have sex with the car

[00:07:13] Not the driver not the driver. I'm over here. Think about putting your cock on my lips

[00:07:18] I'm gay now. You're making me gay

[00:07:20] I'm a gay for the car. You're making me a whole movie

[00:07:23] Now having sex with men slow you want me oh, yeah, that's so fucking true. That's so true about Robert Dubois

[00:07:47] Yeah, it's fucking let me see if I can just find a days of underclap cuz that's probably the best. Yeah

[00:08:12] Yeah, I don't want to watch

[00:08:14] Even 10 more seconds a days of thunder that's where that's where he was getting poontang from Nicole Nicole for the first

[00:08:24] The Don Simpson classic he he inserted himself in a movie that was supposed to be his big acting debut

[00:08:31] Well, who do you play?

[00:08:34] Yeah, you're gonna play in a like a race car driver named Antonio

[00:08:39] He was in one scene and it was awful

[00:08:41] I'm fucking Tom Cruise had to let go see him

[00:08:48] Yeah directed it, but I mean it's it's a Don Simpson Jerry Bruckheimer pictures

[00:08:53] Yeah, they're making a lot of calls. Yeah, Tony Scott just sat there while they were like

[00:08:57] I mean, you know, I think you continued to operate is like a commercial director wall fucking right?

[00:09:02] He's just a technical guy. Yeah, they spent so much fucking money on that movie. Wow. Yeah, it was a flop

[00:09:09] Yeah, I think it made least made it

[00:09:14] It was way over budget. It wasn't it didn't do the numbers of top gun did oh after top after top gun

[00:09:20] I saw the trillion go from fucking planes to cars. Dude. That was the beginning of the end for you got to go next level

[00:09:26] Spaceships or so boats. Yeah, it was the beginning of the

[00:09:30] Some with you for Simpson and Bruckheimer

[00:09:33] Because it was like shortly before that they had a like a three-picture deal with Disney or something

[00:09:39] I can't remember who

[00:09:40] But they they like branded themselves as producers with this like visionary alliance thing and took out like full-page ads and got like

[00:09:48] Pictures of themselves and leather jackets and like right, you know, God like drunk with power basically

[00:09:54] So everyone in Hollywood was just waiting for them gunning for them to fucking blow it

[00:09:58] Yeah, and days of thunder was was sort of that

[00:10:01] But I mean they quickly recovered with bad boys bad boys is a fucking classic. Yeah. Yeah, the rock is that them that is

[00:10:07] Yeah, yeah

[00:10:09] Alone did all the pirates movies, right? What's interesting is Don hated the idea for con air

[00:10:15] Wow, he really didn't want to make that move. Oh he didn't like a man could not be more wrong about anything

[00:10:21] That movie rocks cock and then you know days is thunder, you know is

[00:10:25] Properly regarded within the Tony Scott cannon as a no-tour worker genius

[00:10:31] Top gun planes days under cars. Yeah, he's gots last movie before killing himself about a train. That's right on stop

[00:10:40] He went he offed himself. Yeah, yeah, the wrong brother killed himself

[00:10:44] Damn should have been Ridley. I really I visited his grave in LA

[00:10:49] Hollywood Forever Cemetery and the coolest part of it

[00:10:51] It's like it's like a slab of Marvel and there's like like a like a

[00:10:56] Sculpture like a sculpted figure of a man like climbing up like a sort of jagged rock face

[00:11:00] But then on the side of the marble like etched into it on one side of the grave is just his filmography respect

[00:11:07] There's now there's a man like being recommended Spanish clips of days of hell. Yeah, well Spanish Robert Duvall

[00:11:14] Now the other Dias de Trueno es banjo

[00:11:17] Oh

[00:11:19] Fuck how do you say is that hey say slow that's how you say days of thunder. Oh, we really do figure out how to say slow in Spanish

[00:11:28] It's not rapid

[00:11:37] Dude I'm gonna have am I fucking oh my fucking tombstone. I'm gonna have a little figurine of a guy getting his dick

[00:11:43] Mm-hmm. It's gonna say it's gonna say about the breakfast. It's not gonna say this merely one joke

[00:11:51] Wow Adam very nice level humor. I haven't seen you

[00:11:55] Remember the I'm sorry. You just become no that was hurtful. No, I'm disappointed in you

[00:12:00] You just merely be I should have thought internet commenter

[00:12:03] No, no, I mean it was it was us saying that first they and then they started saying them well

[00:12:09] How many years ago? Yeah, I shouldn't say the same thing. It was three years ago

[00:12:12] You say on my tombstone it'll say that I'm your bug if I that would be exact

[00:12:18] That would be like if I said a bug who eats dust right and I would have been like all right

[00:12:21] You but you would have been you would have been do it a hurry you would have been disappointed you yes

[00:12:27] Yes, that's what I'm saying. It doesn't hurt. I'm disappointed. You know what you're keeping me honest right now

[00:12:31] Yeah, and I that's just that's a mark of a good friend exactly right

[00:12:35] And so that makes me appreciate you even more respect listen and we're at day four of this journey

[00:12:39] We've been on right now. I know tomorrow. Do we do acid?

[00:12:43] I didn't think good to say about me. This is do you all think

[00:12:53] So he really loves delivering his line slop

[00:12:59] You gotta run out of the clock on all your lines slow everybody know a good movie needs to be

[00:13:05] 120 121

[00:13:07] 122 minutes trying trying winning Academy Award with one line

[00:13:13] Did he ever use like the godfather you got a fuck off again? Yeah, I don't think he was pachino didn't win

[00:13:23] What's his face one

[00:13:26] Because there means of the Indians

[00:13:28] I'm not a smart man or wife

[00:13:37] I see the world

[00:13:40] But I didn't go no way on purpose

[00:13:48] I think this is just from his own birthday

[00:13:50] I

[00:13:55] Words I never tried to be an actor. I just

[00:13:59] Just figured out which way the point one direction I go that way

[00:14:03] And now I ended up here on everybody's accusing me of being slow

[00:14:07] everybody

[00:14:09] everybody

[00:14:10] Asked me to do a job

[00:14:13] I don't know no, I would job is in my life, right?

[00:14:17] Seems like you're about to go into Biden. Yeah, they're very similar. That might be the path there

[00:14:21] There we go. We have to one day of it. I think this is January 3rd. It's January 3rd. I'm saying this is a whole

[00:14:28] Season as a

[00:14:31] Constructive criticism. I think when you're buying this is a construct. Okay. Why don't you suck my fucking car?

[00:14:38] I think when you're by why don't you suck my fucking car is most off

[00:14:42] It's it's veers into southern and you know what I just closed my eyes and I thought it was stone cold steam

[00:14:47] Oh, yeah, it sounded that sounds why you come over here and suck my dick down

[00:14:51] Why would you come down say why don't step down in his ring?

[00:14:54] Why don't you why don't you do an impression of stone cold that isn't just repeating things off?

[00:14:59] No stone cold Steve. Oh, but so cold says stepped out in this ring. He says, oh, we're gonna read are we gonna relidded? Yeah, something I could never fix

[00:15:11] I'll probably think you know what you do what you wouldn't and I wish you good luck with that

[00:15:15] I really do what is a graduation speech and I told Charlie what I'd done

[00:15:21] He told me to confess to God

[00:15:23] And somebody else shows like a gift forgiveness, but I didn't want forgiveness

[00:15:33] I wanted a sucker dick. I wanted some pussy slow water the chance to redeem my dick suck my penis in a pussy

[00:15:41] What the fuck movies this

[00:15:44] Training day get low Robert Duvall speech scene get low

[00:15:49] Never heard of it. It's the little John biopic

[00:15:57] Charlie Charlie don't suck

[00:16:00] I think there's one comment on this and it says one of the best acting performances

[00:16:08] Maybe I'll watch this just to dial in

[00:16:10] Duvall Duvall mm-hmm and then Biden that's right Biden's in the movie too. Yeah, that would be nice

[00:16:19] The movie we just watched it was really fucking good was a little man little man the way brothers rock you missed it

[00:16:26] But there is a key part of the movie is that little man

[00:16:31] It's it's a it's a midget he's a jules a little person is a little yeah, and he pretends to be a

[00:16:37] Marriage is a little yeah, right he's got a huge dick blue streak is like he steals a diamond that pretends to be a cop

[00:16:44] Little man pretends to be a baby because he's already little right we could all we have no care

[00:16:49] We all pretend to be babies

[00:16:52] We all pretend to be a baby

[00:16:54] And then you get to suck on a titty

[00:16:57] And we all live off milk. Yeah, right

[00:17:00] Medicine there is but they say the best medicine is laughter is laugh laughing at people

[00:17:08] You know when my son died I've I

[00:17:11] Washed all of Martin

[00:17:13] First thing I did is I shut down with Hunter and we watched Mark

[00:17:29] To be more like the people

[00:17:35] That's not what hunter did it

[00:17:37] Every smoke crack because he wanted to be like the people on my basic

[00:17:48] Ukraine you need to look at Martin

[00:17:50] That's more Lawrence water hell he's got all these cracks smoking

[00:18:07] Comela cuts him off she's like listen he was confused. Yeah, I watched Martin. They all belong in jail

[00:18:12] I would have arrested a lot of what's your favorite episode of Martin?

[00:18:17] To pop when to pop

[00:18:23] Who's your favorite girl or Martin to pack

[00:18:28] When to pack is on what are we talking about space jam?

[00:18:34] My favorite TV show in living to park

[00:18:39] But yeah, little man little man rocks

[00:18:45] Yeah, and there's a point where there's a there's a rape that takes place a comedian little man rapes Kerry

[00:18:51] Washy yeah, he pretends to be well. She fought her husband is Sean way

[00:18:56] Yeah, so and they have to go ahead will please like

[00:18:59] He Sean Waynes wants to have a kid with Kerry Washington, but she's got a new promotion right right right so

[00:19:10] Yeah, you'll be a woman with a job absolutely not

[00:19:13] but like so they

[00:19:15] Marlon Waynes as little men just sort of like appears on their doorstep because he needs to hide or

[00:19:21] Re-obtain the diamond that he is still right all off the street. Yes. He's sashed it in Kerry Washington's purse

[00:19:27] Yeah, when they were both at a 7-11 a baby and then like Sean waynes is like I'm gonna show Kerry Washington. I can be a good father by

[00:19:36] Adopt like adopting this kid for the week. Yeah, kind of like when you take an egg home from health class

[00:19:40] Yeah, exactly. It's a lot like it's big daddy meets blue streak

[00:19:43] meets a Clifford Clifford

[00:19:46] It is an adult man pretending to be a baby

[00:19:49] Basically like he's in bed with Kerry Washington

[00:19:52] He's like oh like you know we can try again for like you know get pregnant or whatever and she's like

[00:19:56] Oh, no, like you know, he's watching or whatever. Yeah, it's just CGI Marlon Waynes's head

[00:20:02] Leering over yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, and before that you missed it

[00:20:07] There's a point where she's giving him like raspberry kiss

[00:20:10] You know blow his belly and he tried he with both hands tries to push her head down to suck his cock

[00:20:18] and it's like it's not clear what his plan is because

[00:20:21] Sean is right is at the bathroom and so he's pushing her head down to get head whatever they come back

[00:20:27] They they they've been it was they made it known in the plot of the movie that the baby has a baby

[00:20:32] Has a big day. Oh, yeah, and before they put him to bed. I believe they take his temperature

[00:20:37] They sort of rape him. There's a joke. Yeah, where they have to take a rectal thermometer and he fights it

[00:20:42] Yeah, he fights it. So anyway, they they're starting to make whoopi and Kerry Washington's like the babies in the crib in our room

[00:20:49] And he and then Sean Waynes like oh the baby wouldn't know what what this is and then cut to the morning after the sex

[00:20:56] She wakes up and she's and he's like that was a great night wasn't it?

[00:21:00] She's like I can't remember the last time we've done it two times and he said what do you mean?

[00:21:06] One time and then she she takes the covers off and the baby

[00:21:09] Baby

[00:21:16] Man pretend it's like it's like a PO. It's like yeah, I know fucking baby

[00:21:22] Baby, just I want

[00:21:24] Okay, just he's devised the perfect crime like right genetically and then through his character and street smart

[00:21:31] He's able to get away with any crime

[00:21:34] His guilty of is

[00:21:36] Raped by way of impersonation of

[00:21:40] Raped in the first degree

[00:21:42] Premeditated using being a baby and I love it all are rape

[00:21:46] I absolutely completely rape and then I love the idea that she doesn't recognize that it's not

[00:21:53] Like she's that a baby is fucking her. She doesn't feel her little ass hands or anything any of that. No, I love the idea

[00:22:01] She's just so like you know like enraptured by the love making that yeah, she didn't notice and my fair some guy

[00:22:08] fully standing up behind

[00:22:12] Never address it at the end of the movie. They're all friends. Yeah

[00:22:16] And Shawn Waynes is it like wait like I only busted once last year so with that

[00:22:21] Yeah, nobody it's just a bit nobody questions the fact that we're all laughing at a rape

[00:22:26] Yes, and then nobody other no character is just questioning like hey, what just happened?

[00:22:32] I know weird and it's also like is he what if it's his baby now?

[00:22:36] You know he's busted in her wrong a lot of a lot of yeah

[00:22:41] But you know what are you gonna do?

[00:22:42] Right then you cuz they have their own kid at the end and you're right and you're right

[00:22:47] Well, it looks like seanways, but they are brothers. Oh

[00:22:49] Oh, yeah, that would have been a fun if they ended the movie on the fact that little man impregnated her

[00:22:56] That's a really good end. Yes, that would really they fuck well a little man too. Yeah

[00:23:03] But anyway, so we just wanted to fill you in on that we got it going on your phone dude. Oh nothing

[00:23:09] I was killing time until I can

[00:23:11] Turn which wedge wedge wedge this in again

[00:23:14] Yes, just get just keep working. You got to keep you keep working on

[00:23:21] Something until it gets worse. Mm-hmm. And that's what I've dedicated my life to

[00:23:29] Keep trying and trying until you don't get better

[00:23:33] But the world becomes such a piece of shit that people have to accept

[00:23:37] Don't even notice how fucking bad you are your job that you're a shittier version of yourself

[00:23:44] Which was already shit. It's just not good to begin. You don't get better. You just wait for the world to get worse

[00:23:51] Mm-hmm. Amen. Amen to that brother Wow, so fellas. Do we have any New Year's resolutions?

[00:23:59] How would we want to do it now in 2021 fucking there's nothing to do

[00:24:03] There's no way. Yeah, there's no way by January. This is what's today today's January January

[00:24:09] But if I had to go back and think what if you were to think how would you what were you thinking on let's say November 19th November 18th or 18th?

[00:24:17] I have my diary right here. Yeah, let's look back to November 18th. Let's see

[00:24:21] What we would have said I can't Johnny's lips. I drive together that I

[00:24:26] Visited the discovery zone where the ball pit was a bunch of pussy

[00:24:34] Where the ball pit was a giant pussy, that's awesome. Yeah, that would be a cool ball pit. You just slide right in. Yeah

[00:24:43] Yeah, yeah, my new resolution would be you know, just think back to let's say mid November this year

[00:24:50] You know don't come stay at the cum cabin

[00:24:52] Yeah, the whole team the whole team is we are running a train on will by the way. Yeah, you don't get to come here

[00:24:59] That was awesome

[00:25:00] Will's little boy pussy's wild because his whole body's hairy, but his asshole is completely clean

[00:25:07] We're running through the whole Brooklyn social circle. We've got one person coming at a time up to the cabin

[00:25:12] Uh-huh. We're scattered we staggered them. This isn't really about recording the show. It's about

[00:25:16] So I hang out with our famous waving our way through our front. Yep, and we have some promot on will now

[00:25:22] Yeah, cuz we have a video of him sucking items. Well, we've got a drawing next up. Yeah. Yeah. Well, yeah

[00:25:27] The video camera wasn't working

[00:25:29] I was character artists do it

[00:25:33] Like one thing

[00:25:36] Still

[00:25:38] Sucking out of secular movie

[00:25:41] Watching money train

[00:25:43] That's not hold up as much as a little man. No, but it was good

[00:25:49] First of all Wesley snipes

[00:25:51] Or I'm sorry J. Lo you can see your tit. Yeah, I thought you could see I've never seen much more explicit

[00:25:57] You can see Wesley sort of pumping you can see his ass cheeks

[00:26:01] But you can't you can see your titty from one specific angle, but sculpted back. Here's what I like

[00:26:05] It's a very realistic angle. It's an angle that you it's not a it's not a it's tasteful

[00:26:11] Well, it's not one of these Hollywood angles. It's makes it look as good as possible

[00:26:15] It's a real angle that you might see a titty at when you're fucking

[00:26:18] Uh-huh, you're watching through a camera. Should you be fuck. No, no, that's not what I'm saying

[00:26:24] You see the titty not completely at its best, which I like oh, I thought it looked great

[00:26:30] It looked great, but it's meant to look real might yeah my new year's resolution is to fix this Joe Biden impression

[00:26:37] That's good man. It's gonna drive me insane

[00:26:39] Double the bread double the head for me of course every year

[00:26:45] Revolutionary

[00:26:47] Institutional changes like what well for example, I think we have to fundamentally change the way in which we deal with

[00:26:56] Institutional racism he sounds good

[00:26:58] Oh, yeah, black people being fucking annoying we got it. We got it. Let's start letting black people go to build a man

[00:27:10] One of the institutions

[00:27:16] They're not letting black people go to his building

[00:27:19] I like the Joe Biden said like he thinks about like institutional problems the institution. He's thinking of as like the Ronald McDonald

[00:27:28] I'm only only this year learning what institutions are

[00:27:34] Is he thinking of is yeah, Ronald McDonald House and like the casey case on top 40 count

[00:27:39] We got a little black god be casey case

[00:27:42] Well, let him vote. Why don't we're gonna have a black guy on who wants to be a millionaire?

[00:27:51] There's never been a that Alex Trebek just died. Why don't we get a blackout?

[00:27:56] Well, I've Wayne Brady on jeopardy

[00:27:58] Police brutality solved

[00:28:02] Wayne Brady now, I don't want to see him do jeopardy

[00:28:06] I'm sorry, but I got to put my foot down

[00:28:08] He can stay over on let's make a dealer wherever the fuck he's on should be told me. Let's issue

[00:28:15] Larry on police issues. There's the issue of accumulation of wealth

[00:28:21] Issue of accumulation of of calcium deposits on my brain

[00:28:27] There's they've got an issue now a lot of blood rich people they have all the money. There's also a bunch of plaques

[00:28:34] I'm a brain preventing neurons from connecting

[00:28:39] Sometimes I can't use my left hand. I'll often I've every letter I've written in the last five years

[00:28:45] I've had to use my asshole to hold the best

[00:28:53] They're accusing me of having fake their blank pieces of paper and pictures well, yeah

[00:28:58] What do you want me to do? I have a picture of my asshole

[00:29:00] I

[00:29:02] Have to sign everything with my asshole. Mm-hmm. They did the same thing with Bob Dole

[00:29:06] Oh, yeah, man to tape a pencil into his hand because he broke his arm Jack and guys off and we're

[00:29:20] Big

[00:29:22] Bob Dole he taught me the asshole trick

[00:29:28] They have salute to Bob Dole who took dick pills yeah, yeah with the first guy too a fucking

[00:29:34] honesty of

[00:29:36] broke down barriers for dick pills

[00:29:38] an awful lot of black dick pills

[00:29:45] Equally as there is qualified as white Americans based on the same status they're in in terms of economic opportunity

[00:29:50] But they don't get a chance so for example

[00:29:53] We just made every corporation pay a minimum 15% tax and 91 pay no tax that raises over

[00:30:00] $400 billion damn that's he had to memorize seven numbers. Yeah, and it was tough you could tell

[00:30:06] I was now you're gonna have to do me a favor since I said all that you're gonna have to call my family to come pick me up

[00:30:12] Because I forgot my phone number that's been pushed out of my

[00:30:23] Fuck I think the area codes is five

[00:30:27] But other than that you're gonna have to you're gonna have to fucking navigate my what do they call fuck goddamn

[00:30:35] You know the cell phones or old people

[00:30:37] Oh

[00:30:40] I accidentally replaced my I didn't want my pencil holding

[00:30:46] Ability to deteriorate because I took a week off from writing that's right to think to memorize those numbers

[00:30:51] So I was keeping my jitter bug on there and

[00:30:54] Would you believe it the damn thing got sucked all the way up into my small intestine?

[00:31:00] Have you seen the people who try to say that like it's

[00:31:03] You can't make fun of Biden's like you know, yeah, because he's actually just him having a stutter

[00:31:09] Yeah

[00:31:11] People are called facts

[00:31:14] And we've done a study and the people that are saying that are what you wouldn't refer to as

[00:31:25] Yes, you can get away with it once but saying it twice

[00:31:29] I mean you it wasn't in the heat of the moment. It was not you thought about it

[00:31:34] You gotta say it was you gotta say the only say the word once

[00:31:41] I

[00:31:49] Am ready to call my faggin

[00:31:53] All right, let's go

[00:31:55] What's wrong in role? It's driving up to like a nice gay couple go ahead

[00:32:02] It's time to do it Nick no not yet. Okay, okay

[00:32:32] Pumped up. Yeah, no, it's so fun. I've seen from the movie never saw it. Do you remember that scene?

[00:32:36] Was it 60 seconds? Yeah before they go steal cars

[00:32:39] See they have to put on lowrider and Nick Cage has like a meditative moment while he takes the song in

[00:32:45] When it gets to the like that

[00:32:48] He does this like weird thing. He's like all right. Let's go. Yeah, does that Elvis hand thing?

[00:32:52] He loves that he loves all this he loves all the love's the king. I'm trying to suck dick

[00:33:10] So sucked sucked in 60 seconds

[00:33:15] What the fuck is that sucked in 60 minutes? That's my dick. Yeah, here we go

[00:33:20] What's the longest you think you've got your dick sucked? Oh a long time. Seriously. Yeah, how long I love being

[00:33:27] Time it goes over like 20 minutes. Yeah, of course

[00:33:30] My early days of getting sucked because it's here anxiety

[00:33:34] Who would suck a dick that long a girl that's really

[00:33:38] Insecure young young. Yeah, and a guy that's young not being like hey, you don't have to right

[00:33:46] Feeling that in my head

[00:33:48] Mm-hmm

[00:33:50] I don't know. I think it's your for your first appearance on the show. I'll remember listening for like I bet you guys like getting lunch

[00:33:55] Episode two. Yeah, I was getting lunch like at work like somewhere in Midtown and I was just sitting outside trying to eat a sandwich

[00:34:05] Nearly choking when you told a story about a girl giving you a hand job for like 50 minutes in a car

[00:34:09] Yeah, and then I came in my own face

[00:34:12] I'm blasting my own face. I'm not even I bonded that day first time I got a hand job. I busted my own face

[00:34:20] It's true. It's a common thing a common refrain. I feel many if you guys are busted in your own faces

[00:34:27] Never no come on. Are you serious? What is your dick bend which way back?

[00:34:32] If your dick is totally hard. Does it bend back at all my dick's never totally hard curve back out of the question

[00:34:38] Yeah, it curves back not enough to come in your own face. I don't I don't come in

[00:34:44] Yeah, no, it's never happened to me. Can you believe these fucking guys? It's against

[00:34:49] Wait, were you sitting down? I was we're in the backseat of a car. Yeah, we laying or sitting

[00:34:54] See I was laying down in my dick

[00:34:56] I was like kind of laying back like in the backseat of her car and she was jacking me off

[00:35:00] Well the longer you get jacked on the fat already the fatter than that is. Yeah, exactly. I'll push you as an Audi. That's why I

[00:35:06] Know

[00:35:12] Cuck her pussy

[00:35:22] You gotta let people know you're gay, slow, true,

[00:35:26] start off when I saw about a girl.

[00:35:28] Very funny, I agree with Matt.

[00:35:29] I said to myself, I was like, I deserved it.

[00:35:31] I showed himself up.

[00:35:32] Yeah, I did set myself up.

[00:35:34] No, but I, so I blasted my own face, and then I like,

[00:35:36] I was like, oh, and then I kind of wiped it in the seat,

[00:35:39] and she's like, this is my mom's Audi.

[00:35:41] Because that's because her momma had a dick too.

[00:35:46] Because she had two daddies, both of them had dicks.

[00:35:50] What did she call her mama?

[00:35:52] That was what he means by Audi, and that's what it was.

[00:35:54] Yeah, that's true.

[00:35:56] The car was a toy holder.

[00:35:58] How many, so how did you wipe the come off?

[00:36:01] So then I found like a t-shirt, and then I realized

[00:36:03] it was my own t-shirt.

[00:36:06] So then I had to wear this cum shirt.

[00:36:08] Yeah.

[00:36:11] Yeah, I was pretty pissed when that happened to me.

[00:36:13] Pretty brutal.

[00:36:14] Because the point of it is that if you don't come,

[00:36:17] then like, if you don't get her to finish, then you can't say

[00:36:21] that you got a hand job.

[00:36:23] No, you could get a hand job.

[00:36:24] What happened to Delroy Lindo?

[00:36:26] He was just in the five bluds.

[00:36:28] Oh, wasn't he the four bluds?

[00:36:30] The five.

[00:36:31] Five.

[00:36:32] You got to have one more blood than that.

[00:36:34] Something enough to have four, you got to have five.

[00:36:36] What is, who is that guy?

[00:36:38] What do you mean?

[00:36:39] Delroy Lindo.

[00:36:40] I'm the one-time character.

[00:36:41] Yeah, even I know who that guy is.

[00:36:42] Yeah, how does it stop her?

[00:36:44] He was in Ransom.

[00:36:45] He was in...

[00:36:46] OK.

[00:36:47] Yeah, I don't know.

[00:36:48] He's just like a cool, old black guy.

[00:36:50] Yeah.

[00:36:51] Yeah.

[00:36:52] One of the classical black guys.

[00:36:53] Maybe a face that...

[00:36:54] You're back in town.

[00:36:55] Memphis Raines.

[00:36:56] Wasn't he on...

[00:36:57] Is this just your...

[00:36:58] Is this just your...

[00:36:59] Is this just your...

[00:37:00] Wasn't he on that show?

[00:37:01] Probably.

[00:37:02] I'm going to get you sucker.

[00:37:03] He was...

[00:37:04] He was a...

[00:37:05] He was a Malcolm X series.

[00:37:06] He was the ending of...

[00:37:07] Wasn't he an RCH?

[00:37:08] Of gone in 60 seconds and so funny.

[00:37:09] Do you remember the part of the movie?

[00:37:10] Was he...

[00:37:11] I think they used a crane or something or something?

[00:37:12] Or something earlier than that.

[00:37:13] Yeah.

[00:37:14] He was in... he's no longer stealing cars.

[00:37:16] He's trying to go straight.

[00:37:17] He's trying to go straight.

[00:37:18] He's trying to get home compared to other...

[00:37:20] Yeah.

[00:37:21] Geovoniger B.C.

[00:37:22] Sorry, my daughter.

[00:37:23] Geovoniger B.C. is his younger brother.

[00:37:24] Geovoniger B.C. gets in trouble with some kind of like French criminal or something.

[00:37:29] And the guy...

[00:37:30] You know, he's either going to kill Geovoniger B.C.

[00:37:35] But he knows that Memphis Raines is his brother.

[00:37:37] And Memphis Raines is the best car thief.

[00:37:39] Right.

[00:37:40] So he's like, here's 60 cars that you have to steal by midnight in three days.

[00:37:44] You know, and like deliver them all to the port or I'll kill your brother.

[00:37:47] And so like Nicholas Cage agrees to it.

[00:37:49] But Delroy Lindo plays as detective.

[00:37:51] They're like, I got my eye on you, Raines.

[00:37:54] I'm going to...

[00:37:55] Yeah, you mess up in any way.

[00:37:56] I'm going to bust your ass down.

[00:37:57] Right.

[00:37:58] You know, or whatever.

[00:37:59] So Nicholas Cage has to just like steal all these cars.

[00:38:04] He assembles his team and they steal them all in like one night and he gets them to...

[00:38:08] Like the Kerman...

[00:38:09] He gets them like right at the...

[00:38:10] Like the deadline.

[00:38:11] But there's still the guy like double crosses him and he ended up in some fight.

[00:38:15] At the same time, Delroy Lindo is pursuing Nicholas Cage.

[00:38:19] He ends up in this like factory where the like final fight is going down.

[00:38:23] And the bad guy eventually like lines up with Delroy Lindo and the bad guy like has

[00:38:30] Delroy Lindo where he's about to kill him.

[00:38:32] And so Nicholas Cage like shoves the bad guy off like a railing or something and murders

[00:38:38] him.

[00:38:39] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:38:40] Don't worry about it.

[00:38:42] I'll clean all this up.

[00:38:44] He's like, I was going to get you for Grand Theft Auto.

[00:38:46] Yeah, right.

[00:38:47] I'll let you off for capital murder.

[00:38:49] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:38:50] I got your back right.

[00:38:51] Because this mess you got me into while stealing cars or I was killed me.

[00:38:56] That rocks.

[00:38:57] Yes, it's very funny.

[00:38:59] That's a good kind of cop.

[00:39:00] I need more cops like that.

[00:39:02] Thank you very much.

[00:39:03] You got to be the kind of cop that's good.

[00:39:05] That's good.

[00:39:06] Let you do crime.

[00:39:07] You got to be cop that is less like Darren Wilson and more like McGruff.

[00:39:13] Yeah, that's true.

[00:39:15] That was a good guy.

[00:39:16] I agree with you.

[00:39:17] Yeah.

[00:39:18] I want to see McGruff's penis.

[00:39:20] Yeah.

[00:39:21] And yeah.

[00:39:22] How come way we've never seen McGruff's penis?

[00:39:25] This is penis.

[00:39:26] Like a man's or like a dog.

[00:39:27] I see you have a man's penis.

[00:39:28] Oh, he got the lipstick like a dog.

[00:39:30] The owner was going to open the trench coat and we can suck his cock.

[00:39:32] Because he's a girl as a trench girl.

[00:39:35] It's just natural that he was just like, yeah, he's a guy's wearing a duster.

[00:39:39] Yeah.

[00:39:40] Yeah, we all wait around here waiting for McGruff to pull his cock out.

[00:39:43] Do you remember they had commercials on TV for McGruff?

[00:39:47] Of course.

[00:39:48] And they were like, and it was a kid, you had to wave both your arms in the air.

[00:39:53] If you're in trouble and then the McGruff, like a car with a picture of McGruff on it

[00:39:57] would like come and help you out.

[00:39:59] But why wouldn't a pedophile just get the McGruff sticker and put it on their car?

[00:40:04] Honestly, someone probably did.

[00:40:06] Someone probably got child dick and pussy because of that.

[00:40:09] Yeah.

[00:40:10] It's fucked up.

[00:40:11] It seemed like a flawed system even at the time.

[00:40:12] Only you can suck a dick out of crime.

[00:40:14] Only you can give me head or I'll burn down your whole fucking neighborhood.

[00:40:19] If you tell your parents what I did, you're off the force.

[00:40:22] Did you guys take dinner?

[00:40:24] Turn in your badge and pussy.

[00:40:27] I remember the dare.

[00:40:30] I don't think I ever took a dare curriculum at school, but I think we had health classes

[00:40:37] or something like the class of the TQ about the bad stuff in life, like sex and crap.

[00:40:43] And there was used dare materials.

[00:40:47] And I remember one explaining what psychedelics were, LSD in mushrooms.

[00:40:52] I think they basically explained it by saying you're watching cartoons on TV like your

[00:40:58] favorite cartoons.

[00:40:59] Imagine taking a drug that will make your reality like a cartoon and I was like, oh my

[00:41:04] God.

[00:41:05] Sounds awesome.

[00:41:06] You look like McGruff and Reagan had sex.

[00:41:10] Look at these pictures.

[00:41:12] Were they in bed?

[00:41:14] Oh my God, McGruff is huge.

[00:41:17] This is probably late era Reagan, so fully senile.

[00:41:20] He just thinks he's talking to a dog.

[00:41:22] Yeah, yeah.

[00:41:23] I'm the most beautiful man the other night.

[00:41:26] He thinks he just liberated this dog from Auschwitz.

[00:41:31] Yeah.

[00:41:32] You know, I've always been disgusted by gay sex, but when it's a dog, there's something

[00:41:39] beautiful about it.

[00:41:40] Something gorgeous.

[00:41:42] I'd like to apologize to Americans.

[00:41:46] Last night I contracted the HIV virus.

[00:41:51] I was having sex with what I believed to be a dog.

[00:41:53] I thought it was a giant dog fucking me.

[00:41:57] I'm an interesting American people.

[00:42:01] I had no knowledge of me fucking over the crime dog.

[00:42:05] The dick in my ass being gay man.

[00:42:07] When I knew my heart was true, but the facts were worth it.

[00:42:10] That's what the Alzheimer's actually was, was he was just riddled with HIV.

[00:42:15] It's not Alzheimer's.

[00:42:16] I've gone insane.

[00:42:18] I'm a fucking dog just fucking me.

[00:42:24] That's what we need back.

[00:42:26] That's the greatest president of America.

[00:42:28] That's what we need him again.

[00:42:29] Nancy, what'd you do with my Marmaduke strips?

[00:42:32] I bet Marmaduke's got a real nice cock on him.

[00:42:37] She had a psychic that was like making decisions like like state craft decisions.

[00:42:46] That's why we didn't start World War 3.

[00:42:49] That's pretty chill.

[00:42:53] When he was fully seen now, he was just like the psychic, had a direct line.

[00:42:58] Wasn't Woodrow Wilson's bitch running the country?

[00:43:00] He was, at the end of his life as well.

[00:43:03] He had gone also a party as well.

[00:43:05] Respect to everyone.

[00:43:06] Everyone there being a president from 1930 to 1995 was having sex with dogs.

[00:43:11] That's true.

[00:43:12] That's the end of their eyes.

[00:43:14] You kind of run out of kids.

[00:43:15] Same thing happened after the ORs.

[00:43:16] That's why they all have a presidential dog and Trump didn't have one.

[00:43:20] He broke the trade up not fucking dogs.

[00:43:23] Yeah, JFK was like, are you kidding me?

[00:43:26] I'm not going to fuck a dog.

[00:43:27] I'm going to continue to fuck horse.

[00:43:29] They were like, well, we got to kill him.

[00:43:31] They killed him.

[00:43:32] LBJ used to hold the dog by its ears.

[00:43:34] I'm like, yeah, it's serious.

[00:43:35] Fuckin'.

[00:43:36] Yeah.

[00:43:37] You block, block, block.

[00:43:38] We had a call.

[00:43:39] It's Texas-down dog.

[00:43:40] Texas-down.

[00:43:41] You got to fucking dog.

[00:43:42] You got to fucking dog.

[00:43:43] You got to fucking dog.

[00:43:44] You got to fucking dog Texas-down.

[00:43:46] You ended up by the horns.

[00:43:49] That picture is so crazy.

[00:43:50] I don't know how he speaks or what he sounds.

[00:43:54] A hardcore leg horn basically.

[00:43:56] Yeah, but I don't know.

[00:43:57] I can't.

[00:43:58] I mean, it texts his accent, but beyond that.

[00:43:59] He loved finger fucking.

[00:44:01] That's true.

[00:44:02] He once finger banged a lady in the back seat of a car while his wife was in the passenger

[00:44:06] seat.

[00:44:07] I think something lady heard.

[00:44:08] What a woman.

[00:44:09] Lady bird, yeah.

[00:44:10] So have you heard that recording of him where he's trying to get pants and he's talking

[00:44:15] about how leggings ruined finger fucking?

[00:44:18] He's like pissed that they invented leggings.

[00:44:20] He's ruined finger fucking.

[00:44:23] That's my president, dude.

[00:44:24] Some of the joke he told about a boat with Kennedy.

[00:44:29] He was like, oh, you think the water scroller or whatever?

[00:44:34] Lynn Johnson was like, I'll take a piss and find out.

[00:44:38] Hell yeah.

[00:44:39] That big hog.

[00:44:40] He said I got more pussy by accident than Kennedy ever got on purpose.

[00:44:45] That's so cool.

[00:44:47] He's the most legendary coxeman in the United States.

[00:44:51] That's true.

[00:44:52] By far.

[00:44:53] And then you're right there.

[00:44:54] Trump had no pets.

[00:44:55] And then as soon as Biden fucking won the election, there was a story like a minute

[00:44:59] after about the Biden dogs.

[00:45:00] And I'd never seen these folks.

[00:45:01] Yeah, they came out of nowhere.

[00:45:02] And these two German shepherds.

[00:45:03] They're not the German shepherds.

[00:45:05] The first rescues in the White House.

[00:45:09] Yeah.

[00:45:10] Yeah, but they give us some good ass.

[00:45:12] I promise I'll start fucking the dogs now.

[00:45:16] I've been fucking dogs for years.

[00:45:19] That's a major part of being president.

[00:45:22] Damn, dude.

[00:45:24] I'm gay.

[00:45:27] I'm Ronald Reagan and I'm gay.

[00:45:31] One of the reasons I never took age seriously is because I'd been having raw bearback exchange

[00:45:37] sex up and down the East Coast every night for the last 15 years.

[00:45:44] Never got so much as a cold.

[00:45:47] I thought all STDs were alive, cooked up by the Jewish banks to sell fake medicine.

[00:45:56] So when all of these bottom facts started complaining about their tea cells, I thought

[00:46:02] it was a way to get something for nothing.

[00:46:04] As a top, it disgusted.

[00:46:09] Yeah, I agree.

[00:46:13] He was gay, but he was a top.

[00:46:16] He probably did get some nice pussy when he was on Bonanza.

[00:46:20] He got pussy from the monkey.

[00:46:21] Oh, yeah.

[00:46:22] Bozo.

[00:46:23] Yeah.

[00:46:24] Bozo.

[00:46:25] Or Bonzo.

[00:46:26] Yeah, bedtime for Bonzo.

[00:46:29] There's a very funny video clip of him in a movie just slapping the shit out of a woman.

[00:46:34] They call him Bonzo because those bonds are so tight.

[00:46:39] I could barely fit my cock in his ass.

[00:46:42] Stop.

[00:46:43] Another presidential history you might like to know is that Nancy Reagan was famous or

[00:46:49] infamous in the Hollywood of the same era when he met Ronald Reagan for having the best

[00:46:53] head game in the best.

[00:46:54] Whoa.

[00:46:55] Yeah, they called him the

[00:46:34] show.

[00:46:41] Stop.

[00:46:42] Yeah, another presidential history you might like to know is that Nancy Reagan was famous

[00:46:48] or infamous in the Hollywood of the same era when he met Ronald Reagan for having the

[00:46:52] best head game in the best.

[00:46:54] Whoa.

[00:46:55] Yeah, they called him the

[00:46:34] Mosey.

[00:46:56] She was the blowjob queen.

[00:46:57] Oh, yeah.

[00:46:58] Oh, yeah.

[00:46:59] We've looked that up on the show.

[00:47:01] Stop has actually learned this on that show.

[00:47:04] I forgot.

[00:47:05] It was funny that he forgot it.

[00:47:08] That rules.

[00:47:09] I didn't know that.

[00:47:10] This is the kind of stuff you need to know.

[00:47:11] This is stuff that Stop would have learned in the PhD he has in people's life.

[00:47:17] Yeah.

[00:47:18] How they fucked and who he has access to this information.

[00:47:21] I don't even know what happens.

[00:47:22] We'll be on our show, talking to somebody in the show and then he'll start looking

[00:47:25] up and be like, oh, apparently they fucked a lot.

[00:47:28] And it's like, what website?

[00:47:29] Stop filming Carrie with happens.

[00:47:31] Yeah, he's gay.

[00:47:32] No, he had a male roommate who was his best friend.

[00:47:35] But then he had wives.

[00:47:36] But whatever.

[00:47:37] So what?

[00:47:38] I have a male roommate who's my best friend.

[00:47:40] I'm gay.

[00:47:41] I actually had sex with eldest several times.

[00:47:46] I blew out his big Albanian ass.

[00:47:49] I'm going to have sex with elders.

[00:47:51] That's one of the things we got to do.

[00:47:54] I'm going to have sex with elders.

[00:47:57] My name is Nickson.

[00:47:59] He was the first president who had sex with elders.

[00:48:02] I fucked elders.

[00:48:05] I fucked elders in his house.

[00:48:09] Raid my lips.

[00:48:10] I sucked.

[00:48:11] Alder's is pain.

[00:48:13] Wow.

[00:48:14] They all did.

[00:48:15] Every president has sex to the biggest pop star there.

[00:48:19] So Georges W. Bush fucked Michael Jackson.

[00:48:22] I had sex with that.

[00:48:24] I had sex with that, Alba.

[00:48:28] He was talking about Michael Jackson when you were passing.

[00:48:32] It seems like yesterday I was playing TMT, a teenage mini-turtle.

[00:48:37] He abbreviates it but spells turtles with Michael Jackson in my bedroom.

[00:48:42] Wow, that's so cool.

[00:48:45] That rocks.

[00:48:46] He got molested.

[00:48:47] He got molested.

[00:48:48] No, that's so fun.

[00:48:50] Donald Trump Jr. had sex.

[00:48:52] Michael didn't molest anyone.

[00:48:54] Yeah, he did, bro, Joe.

[00:48:55] Oh, he didn't show.

[00:48:56] It doesn't matter if your color is black or white.

[00:49:00] If you're a child, don't set your magic.

[00:49:03] You better not be fucking Chinese.

[00:49:08] Back in white or cool.

[00:49:10] Adam, you're Michael Jackson, truth or?

[00:49:12] He is big time.

[00:49:14] Explaining.

[00:49:15] I don't know.

[00:49:17] That cat, William, is probably the best.

[00:49:19] The best.

[00:49:20] After that bit, it's over.

[00:49:22] Yeah.

[00:49:23] Put him in jail.

[00:49:24] After that bit, show that in court and put him in jail.

[00:49:26] I like bitches.

[00:49:28] So in my house, I have shit that bitches life.

[00:49:33] Now what Michael got, Ferris wheels.

[00:49:35] Got a video game.

[00:49:38] Lolly Pop dispenser.

[00:49:40] That's funny, but that's not sufficient evidence.

[00:49:44] I can't make to anyone in court.

[00:49:46] Cat William should be on Mount Rushmore.

[00:49:48] He is, dude.

[00:49:49] America's fine as well.

[00:49:50] He's so fucking goddamn funny.

[00:49:52] He's so funny.

[00:49:53] His whole special is a rack of war.

[00:49:54] Yeah, it's on the same special.

[00:49:55] It's probably the best joke or the best political comedy.

[00:49:58] It really is.

[00:49:59] It's really good.

[00:50:00] No, that special is him.

[00:50:02] It's short.

[00:50:03] It's only like 45 minutes or 40 minutes.

[00:50:05] But it's like he comes out and he's crushing.

[00:50:08] He's just throwing haymakers the whole fucking time.

[00:50:10] There is not a second filler.

[00:50:12] There's no all killer no filler for sure.

[00:50:14] But is that Pimp Chronicles?

[00:50:16] I don't remember.

[00:50:17] He's wearing the green suit.

[00:50:18] Yeah, the green suit.

[00:50:19] I think it is the Pimp Chronicles.

[00:50:20] At what point did he think it was a good idea to make sure

[00:50:22] that he was a manager?

[00:50:23] Yeah, I know.

[00:50:24] I mean, he's insane.

[00:50:25] He made a couple of bad business decisions.

[00:50:26] He made a couple of bad moves.

[00:50:28] And he made a bad decision to fight that child.

[00:50:30] He could beat him up.

[00:50:32] He got slapped by the kid in that target.

[00:50:33] He had those apartments.

[00:50:35] No, he was just like, I forgot, Target is a different guy.

[00:50:38] He has a long rabbit.

[00:50:39] The video of him fighting the kid is so funny because the setting is like at an apartment.

[00:50:45] They're at an apartment.

[00:50:46] No, they're at apartments.

[00:50:47] No, he's in like a playground behind like a school.

[00:50:50] No, it's...

[00:50:51] I'm like...

[00:50:52] Nick's serious in Chinese.

[00:50:54] The serious...

[00:50:55] Is this Japanese?

[00:50:56] And my watch is on Chinese.

[00:50:58] And on the phone, instead of back to English, but the watch is still stuck in Chinese.

[00:51:02] Nice.

[00:51:03] I go to the Apple Store.

[00:51:04] I do.

[00:51:05] I have to make two...

[00:51:06] Because now my phone's doing that fucking thing again where it says downloading messages

[00:51:08] from iCloud and it doesn't turn off.

[00:51:12] Maybe it's because I sent you one picture of my dick and it's...

[00:51:14] It's too long to...

[00:51:15] It's too big.

[00:51:16] It's too small.

[00:51:17] It's not too small.

[00:51:20] He's got too much data.

[00:51:21] The photo is too small.

[00:51:22] No.

[00:51:23] They said he had a penis but it was a child.

[00:51:27] That's not what they said.

[00:51:28] Is that...

[00:51:29] Yeah, a child's penis.

[00:51:31] Yeah, a child's penis.

[00:51:33] A victory for child's penises.

[00:51:35] They're saying my asshole is a victory for child's penis.

[00:51:38] Can I say something else?

[00:51:40] What?

[00:51:41] Even improved, I think too.

[00:51:42] I think you're get...

[00:51:43] You are progressing.

[00:51:44] What helps is...

[00:51:45] I'll think you've plateaued.

[00:51:47] Not using my hands but also watching just interviews.

[00:51:50] Yeah.

[00:51:51] Because there's a difference...

[00:51:52] We said this before between how he sounds in speeches and how he sounds talking to someone.

[00:51:56] I'll get...

[00:51:57] I mean, I actually haven't spent...

[00:51:58] I spent one night doing the work.

[00:52:00] You put more work in.

[00:52:01] I'll put the work in.

[00:52:02] We got a month.

[00:52:03] I owe it to all the beautiful people that have...

[00:52:06] It's nice.

[00:52:07] It's nice doing this kind of year in reflection.

[00:52:09] It's been a good year, folks.

[00:52:12] I mean, it's actually been a terrible year.

[00:52:14] It's probably one of the worst years of my life.

[00:52:16] It's been a good year.

[00:52:17] It's been a good year if you've been able to turn away from it all and just escape into

[00:52:23] bullshit.

[00:52:24] If you have a bullshit work from home job.

[00:52:25] If you have a bullshit work from home job.

[00:52:27] I just personally had a tough thing.

[00:52:30] But in general, our lives are great.

[00:52:34] I know.

[00:52:35] I remember working with my fucking...

[00:52:36] I remember when Adam's...

[00:52:37] Adam's personal thing is he...

[00:52:39] Alex stopped kissing you on the lips, your friend Alex.

[00:52:42] Oh, I thought he found out that he was using the wrong side of the ruler.

[00:52:45] Oh, yeah, that is true.

[00:52:47] That's...

[00:52:48] He turned out I was starting at 12.

[00:52:51] Oh, I thought he was using the centimeters part.

[00:52:55] Oh, no, the ruler I thought I was thinking was four inches.

[00:52:58] Yeah, I thought it was 11 inches because I was starting at 12.

[00:53:01] He just...

[00:53:02] He had the ruler backwards.

[00:53:04] I like that too.

[00:53:05] That's funny.

[00:53:06] It is funny.

[00:53:07] It's a bit about math.

[00:53:08] Yeah.

[00:53:09] That's all.

[00:53:10] I plan on going to school.

[00:53:11] And it's got a visual element.

[00:53:12] And getting kids to enjoy math by showing them all the funny ways you can call your friends

[00:53:15] gay with a rule.

[00:53:16] Yeah, yeah.

[00:53:17] Or a protractor.

[00:53:18] Oh, yeah.

[00:53:19] Yeah.

[00:53:20] You're getting a hug.

[00:53:21] You're doing something with the wrong angle to be straight.

[00:53:25] Protractor.

[00:53:26] We used to have to measure your dick with a sundial.

[00:53:30] That's how we knew what time it was.

[00:53:31] You'd pull your cock out and put it on your son's face.

[00:53:39] Your son would make something like that.

[00:53:48] I'm not sure how it worked.

[00:53:49] I don't know exactly what it was, but they called that a sundial.

[00:53:56] That's where a son comes from.

[00:53:58] And dial is because he would dial the police afterwards.

[00:54:01] Sometimes you've got to give your son the Egyptian goggles.

[00:54:05] What's it called?

[00:54:06] The Arabian goggles.

[00:54:07] Arabian goggles.

[00:54:08] That's what Tommy taught me.

[00:54:10] That's right.

[00:54:11] Tommy, Georgie.

[00:54:12] My friend, my friend, T. Lawrence.

[00:54:14] He brought it back.

[00:54:16] T. Lawrence invented my friend T. Lawrence.

[00:54:18] He went over there and he brought it back and he showed me all the stuff he learned in

[00:54:22] Arabia.

[00:54:23] It's true.

[00:54:24] We were roommates in college.

[00:54:26] And I showed him the sundial and he said, check this thing out.

[00:54:29] I learned it from the Shah.

[00:54:31] And I said, this doesn't feel like goggles.

[00:54:35] That's right.

[00:54:36] Then they called me the stuttering dick sunken.

[00:54:46] The Delaware dick sunken stuttering.

[00:54:48] Everybody loved getting their dick sucked by me because I had a stutter.

[00:54:53] One more week and we can't do these jokes anymore because they're illegal.

[00:54:58] That's true.

[00:54:59] Freedom of speech just cancels.

[00:55:00] Yeah, maybe two more weeks.

[00:55:03] Yeah.

[00:55:04] It's freedom of speech.

[00:55:05] Freedom of speech will never be illegal.

[00:55:06] Just get to a point where it's thoroughly pointless, where it doesn't matter.

[00:55:11] You know?

[00:55:12] Yeah, I guess.

[00:55:13] I don't fucking.

[00:55:14] I think we're probably already there.

[00:55:17] You can say whatever you want.

[00:55:18] Right.

[00:55:19] And there aren't any real consequences.

[00:55:20] Yeah, unless you have like a fucking, unless you work for like NBC or whatever.

[00:55:25] Well, then what?

[00:55:26] You get fired?

[00:55:27] You're fired.

[00:55:28] You're gonna get fired anyways.

[00:55:30] That's a great point.

[00:55:31] Yeah.

[00:55:32] That's a great fucking point.

[00:55:33] Uh huh.

[00:55:34] The only person that suffered for free had that has their freedom of speech taken away

[00:55:37] was basically Shane.

[00:55:39] He didn't get to be honest at now.

[00:55:41] Yeah.

[00:55:42] That was fucking, you know, my man should be.

[00:55:46] He should have been, he should have been Joe Biden.

[00:55:49] Shane could have been Joe Biden, dude.

[00:55:50] He could have been.

[00:55:51] Yeah.

[00:55:52] He could have done it.

[00:55:53] He probably would have done it well.

[00:55:54] Yeah.

[00:55:55] Yeah.

[00:55:56] I'm fucking gay.

[00:55:57] I'm fucking gay.

[00:55:58] I'm the president of fucking gay.

[00:55:59] I'm from fucking Delaware and I'm gay.

[00:56:02] Yeah.

[00:56:03] I've been like this year, he would have been fine probably.

[00:56:06] Do you think things will chill out?

[00:56:07] I don't know.

[00:56:08] I think they will.

[00:56:09] Yeah.

[00:56:10] Yeah.

[00:56:11] I think Trump.

[00:56:12] I'm fucking no.

[00:56:13] Trump probably stressed everyone else.

[00:56:14] It's because it's stressing.

[00:56:15] I remember in like 2012, 2013, it seemed to get like kind of like, you know, online,

[00:56:20] things were going in the direction that they're in now.

[00:56:22] And it's like, well, it's probably there's going to be like a fascist that gets elected

[00:56:26] and then none of this shit will matter anymore.

[00:56:28] Yeah.

[00:56:29] And then it mattered even more.

[00:56:31] Yeah.

[00:56:32] Oh, true.

[00:56:33] I guess it was the only thing they you could pretend have control over when Trump was

[00:56:38] fucking elected.

[00:56:39] We were like, well, the one that said retard gets to be on TV.

[00:56:43] Yeah.

[00:56:44] That's how we'll fucking show control or show some hole.

[00:56:51] You know what I'm saying?

[00:56:52] Pull your ass cheeks open.

[00:56:55] Show your asshole.

[00:56:56] Yeah.

[00:56:57] We're going to be allowed to do that again when Biden's.

[00:56:59] I hope it's time to show hole again.

[00:57:01] We're going to let people show hole.

[00:57:03] We're going to have a TV shape channels.

[00:57:05] Nothing but pictures of your cock and your asshole.

[00:57:10] Your own cock.

[00:57:11] You got your own asshole on a TV network.

[00:57:14] Wow.

[00:57:15] That's awesome.

[00:57:16] The elusive Joe Biden.

[00:57:18] Joe Biden.

[00:57:19] You're getting there, bud.

[00:57:20] Sorry.

[00:57:21] I just was worried that I didn't put the ice cream in the freezer, but I don't know

[00:57:24] what else.

[00:57:25] Did you?

[00:57:26] Where else would I put it?

[00:57:27] Here's the thing.

[00:57:28] If that were the case, you drive down the street and get more ice cream.

[00:57:32] That's true.

[00:57:33] Is it open 24 hours?

[00:57:34] I got a car and I got a gun.

[00:57:36] That's true.

[00:57:37] They're going to open up.

[00:57:40] Yeah.

[00:57:41] I hope they're open.

[00:57:43] Skip stop by ski masking a gun and something.

[00:57:45] Yeah.

[00:57:46] Go to stewards.

[00:57:47] Get us some fucking ice cream saw.

[00:57:48] Just a fat guy.

[00:57:49] Robbing.

[00:57:50] You'd have to have your pants pulled down so your ass is hanging out on the street.

[00:57:54] I'm going to have to have a crack for shoes.

[00:57:59] Just the most fat crime of all time.

[00:58:00] You're like, no, I don't want any money to get a price cream.

[00:58:02] All 31 flavors.

[00:58:04] Put them all in the bag.

[00:58:06] I'll give them a fuck about your money.

[00:58:10] I want your fucking muddy buddies and I want your fucking ice cream.

[00:58:14] And what's that thing fucking on the roller?

[00:58:17] Give me whatever the fuck kind of weird pretzel dog that is.

[00:58:20] I wish I liked ice cream more.

[00:58:23] Oh, dude, ice cream rocks.

[00:58:25] Yeah, it does.

[00:58:26] You know, I didn't get it.

[00:58:27] I've said it before.

[00:58:28] I'm not going to repeat myself.

[00:58:29] Yeah.

[00:58:30] Unless it's an impression that I continue doing over and over again.

[00:58:32] It doesn't ever get any better.

[00:58:34] Yeah, don't.

[00:58:35] Yeah, just don't say this is whatever the story is.

[00:58:38] Yeah.

[00:58:39] About not, I don't even remember.

[00:58:40] I didn't get an ice cream until I was 22, 22.

[00:58:44] That's right.

[00:58:45] Yeah.

[00:58:46] I can't believe that.

[00:58:47] Not have an ice cream as a kid.

[00:58:48] Yeah, but I had a roommate who would eat ice cream sandwiches.

[00:58:51] And I was like, what the fuck are you doing?

[00:58:54] Right.

[00:58:55] Even you're eating ice cream sandwiches.

[00:58:57] And then I just...

[00:58:58] The sandwiches have ham on them.

[00:58:59] Well, I'm like, oh, I guess I can just...

[00:59:00] I'll never heard of them.

[00:59:01] I guess I could just eat an ice cream sandwich if I want.

[00:59:04] Yeah.

[00:59:05] Whatever I want.

[00:59:06] See, that's not what not going to college did to you.

[00:59:08] Because college is the first time you're like, I can eat whatever the fuck I want whenever

[00:59:12] I want to.

[00:59:13] Yeah.

[00:59:14] It feels awesome.

[00:59:15] Yeah, I think it's more it's just like...

[00:59:16] No, that's what I said.

[00:59:18] Oh, okay.

[00:59:19] No, you're fucking gay.

[00:59:20] And that's what I said.

[00:59:21] Yeah.

[00:59:22] You have to learn.

[00:59:23] Thank you.

[00:59:24] I've been enjoying root beer floats recently.

[00:59:26] Respect.

[00:59:27] I've been giving them my coffee.

[00:59:28] Respect.

[00:59:29] That was my thing.

[00:59:30] When I wanted to be fancy, Nick, that...

[00:59:32] Oh, right.

[00:59:33] You didn't eat ice cream.

[00:59:34] As a fack kid, root beer floats is being fancy, dude.

[00:59:37] Oh, yeah.

[00:59:38] I mean, of you, I would...

[00:59:39] No, because milkshakes, none of that shit.

[00:59:41] I never went down that route.

[00:59:42] Wow.

[00:59:43] I got fat off like bread.

[00:59:44] I got fat off like eating, like making stove...

[00:59:48] Stauffer's stove top stuffing.

[00:59:51] And then eating like three boxes.

[00:59:52] You were a savory fat boy.

[00:59:54] I guess, yeah.

[00:59:55] You were in a candy boy.

[00:59:56] Well, I thought it was all healthy.

[00:59:57] Yeah.

[00:59:58] And then I continued to get fat in fat off my...

[00:59:59] I don't know what the fuck's happening.

[01:00:00] I'm eating nine boxes of stuffing.

[01:00:02] Yeah.

[01:00:03] It's stuffing.

[01:00:04] It's a fucking side dish for...

[01:00:08] It's basically salad.

[01:00:09] It's a salad.

[01:00:10] I've eaten an entire bag of croutons and I'm still fat as shit.

[01:00:13] I don't get it.

[01:00:14] I put on 19 shirts and did as many push-ups as I can.

[01:00:18] That's right.

[01:00:19] I just got it.

[01:00:20] I'm overheating.

[01:00:21] Yeah.

[01:00:22] You just got what?

[01:00:23] I just got into the adult root beer float, which is called...

[01:00:28] Ahfogado.

[01:00:29] Oh, an Aflogado.

[01:00:31] Yeah.

[01:00:32] Which is a scoop of vanilla ice cream and then you get an espresso after dinner and then

[01:00:39] you pour the espresso over the ice cream.

[01:00:42] And it's fucking incredible.

[01:00:44] It's so good.

[01:00:45] Oh, I guess.

[01:00:47] I guess I would just rather have ice cream in coffee separately.

[01:00:51] Maybe a little bit of ice cream with my coffee.

[01:00:54] It's like I can't recommend it enough.

[01:00:57] Maybe next time you come over, you'll make me an Aflogado.

[01:01:00] Aflogado.

[01:01:01] I'll make me an Aflogado.

[01:01:02] Aflogado.

[01:01:03] Oh, fuck my ass.

[01:01:04] Aflogado.

[01:01:05] Aflogado.

[01:01:06] Aflogado.

[01:01:07] Aflogado.

[01:01:08] I forgot to put the dick out of my ass.

[01:01:09] Aflogado.

[01:01:10] I forgot to put on a condom.

[01:01:11] Aflogado.

[01:01:12] Oh, oopsie day.

[01:01:13] Aflogado.

[01:01:14] Aflogado.

[01:01:15] Oh, no, no, you are pregnant.

[01:01:18] Prego, prego, prego.

[01:01:20] I forgot to put on a condom.

[01:01:21] I don't know.

[01:01:22] I was second to fucking I was second to fucking I was second to go to school.

[01:01:23] I'll see.

[01:01:24] All right, folks.

[01:01:25] We did it.

[01:01:26] We fucking did it.

[01:01:27] We did it.

[01:01:28] Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum.

[01:01:29] My dicks hard.

[01:01:30] I'm going to crack it in the third.

[01:01:31] I'm going to crack it in the third.

[01:01:32] Black cherry claw.

[01:01:33] I'm about to drink.

[01:01:34] I'm about to smoke four joints at the same time.

[01:01:35] It is November 18th.

[01:01:36] And we have gotten through the holiday season.

[01:01:39] That's right.

[01:01:40] Yeah.

[01:01:41] Oh, baby.

[01:01:42] Merry Christmas and happy Christmas.

[01:01:43] Happy Hanukkah.

[01:01:44] Happy New Year.

[01:01:45] Happy New Year.

[01:01:46] Happy New Year.

[01:01:47] Happy.

[01:01:48] I thank you guys so much.

[01:01:49] Hope you had a nice holidays.

[01:01:50] We'll be back next week for the first episode.

[01:01:53] It's going to be such a hilarious difference.

[01:01:55] It's so funny.

[01:01:56] Also, we will have completely forgotten how to do it.

[01:01:59] We've been talking about how Biden's going to be the president to be so funny if Trump

[01:02:03] actually steals the election.

[01:02:05] That would be funny.

[01:02:06] That'd be great.

[01:02:07] Right now, from where we're sitting right now.

[01:02:08] I think it would make the more interesting probably.

[01:02:10] Stav's going to be 100 pounds lighter.

[01:02:12] Dude, I'm going to be in Stav's.

[01:02:13] I was going to be like jokes.

[01:02:15] What do you mean, jokes?

[01:02:18] I'm going to be married.

[01:02:19] I'm not going to care about getting a perfect joke.

[01:02:21] I'm going to be fat.

[01:02:22] I'm going to be a perfect Joe Biden impression and no ability to do jokes with it.

[01:02:25] Yeah.

[01:02:26] Like I just spent a lot of time having lunch.

[01:02:28] What did you guys learn in pizzas, Joe?

[01:02:31] How have you guys, what have you been doing?

[01:02:34] Fucks ass.

[01:02:35] And that'll be it.

[01:02:37] That's awesome.

[01:02:38] Yeah.

[01:02:39] Very similar to how it is now.

[01:02:40] Yeah, I guess not to talk about it.

[01:02:41] It'll have not improved in any way you should perform.

[01:02:44] Yeah.

[01:02:45] In fact, there will be no way to discern any kind of difference between this episode and

[01:02:49] the next one.

[01:02:50] Probably.

[01:02:51] Yeah.

[01:02:52] Probably.

[01:02:53] These could be exactly the same.

[01:02:54] Well, happy New Year's.

[01:02:55] Thank you.

[01:02:56] We'll all be happy to have you over here.

[01:02:57] I love all you guys.

[01:02:58] We won't be speaking to us.

[01:03:00] This has been nice.

[01:03:01] It's been really nice.

[01:03:02] It's been really nice.

[01:03:03] I would recommend to everyone who listens to the show.

[01:03:05] You know, if you lost your job because of Corona, maybe you loved one.

[01:03:08] Things are kind of fucked up.

[01:03:10] Let's go get an Airbnb in the world.

[01:03:13] Pretty expensive house in the woods.

[01:03:16] You just want to call.

[01:03:17] A bunch of episodes of your podcast, your friends spend probably $600 on groceries.

[01:03:23] Every day, basically.

[01:03:24] We're eating through about $300 a day.

[01:03:26] Yeah.

[01:03:27] And that's how you quarantine the right way.

[01:03:30] And if you're not doing that, the virus is your fault.

[01:03:34] It's your personal fault.

[01:03:36] If you had to go to work, if you went to work, you're a bitch.

[01:03:39] Did you left the house to go see somebody because you can't afford a TV or Netflix?

[01:03:45] Then you're the reason that we're locking down again.

[01:03:47] So I hope you're happy.

[01:03:48] Anyways, off to my HBO Max subscription that's connected to my Dick Sucking machine.

[01:03:55] My $82,000 Dick Sucking machine that injects me with heroin while I wipe my ass with money

[01:04:01] and still.

[01:04:02] Yeah, let's get addicted to dangerous drug in the next month.

[01:04:06] We're about to do some drugs right now.

[01:04:08] Yeah.

[01:04:09] I can't wait to get fucked up to celebrate.

[01:04:12] Yeah.

[01:04:13] All right, take care.

[01:04:14] Love you guys.

[01:04:15] Stay healthy and safe, America.

[01:04:17] Good luck to you.