Cum Town | Premium | 08/16/2021
[00:00:00] Hello and welcome back to Feminist Podcast,
[00:00:05] Comptown, where you come every week to get a feminist perspective on being in a same-sex
[00:00:11] relationship with your father. That's right. I'm your host, Julia Claire.
[00:00:16] I am Kate Willett. I'm Katie Helper. We actually, Julia's name used to be Katie as well,
[00:00:24] but we had to change it because KKK pretty fun stuff. So we made her do it. Yeah.
[00:00:30] That was actually my username on JDate. I'm not actually kidding though. I don't know if I can
[00:00:36] break her. They're like literally KKK-ed because there's that song because you're Katie. Oh yeah.
[00:00:44] That's pretty problematic. I mean, I didn't realize it unless I was being like subconsciously
[00:00:50] self-loading Jew slash. I think I just really resent online dating and like by jewelry or by
[00:00:58] anything by any tribe. But yeah, it's pretty like subconsciously passive aggressive.
[00:01:04] Did you, did you have sexual intercourse with anyone? Or I didn't mean to actually send
[00:01:08] ever in my life? No, off that app. I didn't know it's actually a center penises or a discussion here.
[00:01:14] Yeah. problematic. I did not have penis penetrating sexual intercourse with anyone I met off of JDate,
[00:01:23] which is probably good because I don't know what kind of
[00:01:26] curated man I would have gotten with the KKK-ed thing. But actually I did get some people who
[00:01:32] didn't notice that. I don't know if I'd remember this song. My grandma used to sing that song.
[00:01:38] Wow. They just cook her your Katie. My grandma was pretty problematic.
[00:01:42] Yeah. Well, I don't think the song is actually problematic.
[00:01:46] Cook Cook Cook Katie. I mean, Katie, that's really, that's actually where you're so wrong.
[00:01:53] I feel like Cook Cook Katie. I mean, it's implicitly making fun of people with a stutter,
[00:01:58] which is extremely. That's okay. I'll on that. That's really ableist. And honestly, Katie,
[00:02:05] I'm just you're off to a really problematic start. And I'm feeling like a little unsafe.
[00:02:14] How can I totally hear that? And I want to honor you and hold the space for you.
[00:02:20] So how can I repair that violence? Is that even a possibility?
[00:02:25] I mean, I really, I don't know. I'm just feeling to myself, I'm feeling really
[00:02:30] gaslit right now because my lived experience of this conversation is that we came together and
[00:02:39] we were supposed to record a podcast. And now this has sort of been hijacked by your guys is like,
[00:02:49] really intense, aggressive energy towards each other. And it's just, yeah, I'm also feeling unsafe.
[00:02:56] I feel like I was trying to speak my truth. And I guess what happens is if you're a woman with
[00:03:02] strong ideas and also like, I didn't really want to go there. But like, I see only Jewish person
[00:03:07] in this group, I feel like I'm getting some kind of problematic, anti-Semitic silencing of me,
[00:03:14] which is deeply grounded in the trope of the loud Jewish woman. So I'm just going to put that out
[00:03:19] there and let you guys like, you know, I'm just, I'm just hoping I'm giving you that I'm,
[00:03:27] I'm leaning into the trust that I have of you guys that you'll actually have you, you, you,
[00:03:32] women that you'll actually like, just consider, you know, like you don't know what you don't know.
[00:03:38] Right. And you know what, I also want to hold space for your claim that, or your
[00:03:45] implication that I'm maybe being anti-Semitic. Yeah, my truth is that you're being anti-Semitic.
[00:03:50] Of course, of course, yes. And you know what, that's some internal work that maybe I have to do
[00:03:56] in my subconscious, maybe some transcendental meditation. I'm not really sure what that means,
[00:04:03] but I will report back. Yeah, just check in. Yeah. Check in and check out.
[00:04:10] Yeah. Okay, I'm going to actually call you both back in right now because as a bisexual woman,
[00:04:16] I'm just really feeling like the analysis of the power dynamic in this situation isn't
[00:04:21] particularly intersectional, you know, and it's just like, there needs to be space for my
[00:04:28] horniness towards other women in this conversation. And this is like really kind of killing that for
[00:04:32] me. Okay, well, as a queer woman who is also sex negative, I think that I'm ultimately the most
[00:04:41] marginalized person in this group. And so, I definitely outside of the context of a concentration camp,
[00:04:47] she would be. But like once we brought in the horizons to the Ashvish. Sure. Yeah. And you know,
[00:04:53] it's game changer. You know what, nobody thinks about that. So, I mean, some of us do because some
[00:04:57] of us like can't help but think about it. We were raised in that. But I definitely would love to
[00:05:02] have the privilege to not imagine that I'm in Auschwitz every minute. You know, for me, it's just like,
[00:05:08] I just feel like no one's really holding space for the fact that it's been a really rough day
[00:05:12] for Italians. I mean, Andrew Cuomo literally came out today, literally, he did it. And he was like,
[00:05:18] I'm not perverted. I'm Italian, you know, and I just, I'm really tired of the stereotype that
[00:05:26] my people are just, you know, eating spaghetti and sex offending. And it's like, this is just,
[00:05:31] you know, this has been a lot. Like I'm just, you know, I'm going to need to like sort of take
[00:05:35] some time to do self care. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You should like take some kind of like deep,
[00:05:43] like marinara sauce, like bath, like where you just kind of like bathe yourself in marinara.
[00:05:50] I mean, kind of like, re-center your culture and reclaim that culture. Okay.
[00:05:55] Marinera sauce. Was that problematic? I thought I was being like really supportive.
[00:05:59] I mean, it is problematic, but it is also a thing that I did with my polycule last week. So,
[00:06:05] maybe people don't know that I knew that. So that's why it was, yeah. Yeah.
[00:06:09] Yeah. I'm allowed to say that. Yeah. Yeah. And in solidarity, I will, I will bathe in the matzo
[00:06:16] ball suit. So that like, because I don't want you to think that I would ever imply something
[00:06:22] for you that I wouldn't also be willing to do to myself before myself or by myself or of myself.
[00:06:29] Okay. Well, we're all, you know, we've established that we're all willing to do the work as everyone
[00:06:34] feeling complete is everyone feeling safe. I'm feeling safe. I'm feeling like this is a space
[00:06:38] where women are supporting women. Okay. Cool. Yeah. I'm supporting women, although like,
[00:06:43] I don't really want to say just that I'm supporting women because it's like, I don't know.
[00:06:48] Women with a Y. That's how I choose. So that's like, by the way, I know it's really old school.
[00:06:53] Yeah. I know. But I'm reclaiming that mostly because I don't like the patriarchal alphabet.
[00:07:00] So I feel like putting a Y in there is actually really disruptive in ways that it doesn't get
[00:07:04] credit for. And in terms of feeling safe, I just want to do a quick body scan for like five seconds.
[00:07:13] What's X. I mean, I'm, you see, like, I wish I could exhale, but unfortunately, as a US,
[00:07:21] which is like a term that I've reclaimed also, we are constantly like, all we want to do is exist
[00:07:29] and like on land that had some people living on there, but they all wanted to leave. Right. And
[00:07:37] all we want to do is feel safe doing that. Like, and we don't feel safe. Like, I feel like there are
[00:07:43] people who would prefer that I didn't, that my people didn't exist on top of their homes. Oh,
[00:07:51] okay. I see where you're going about. I see where you're going with this. And yeah, I assume that
[00:07:57] you were talking about Girl Boss and Chief Israel herself. Yes. Exactly. I'm actually kind of feeling
[00:08:05] like we need to decolonize this conversation. Okay. Okay. Yeah. But like Israel's not cool.
[00:08:10] Just saying, you know, like, I can send you an Instagram about that. Israel is not actually
[00:08:15] settler. Thank you for calling me in on that. I really appreciate that. Yeah. Oh, my gosh.
[00:08:21] My cats are like, yeah, my cat got super triggered. My cat went to the safe space under the bed.
[00:08:29] And my other cat followed her under there because he's not respecting her boundaries.
[00:08:34] And I've tried to call him in several times. But he's like, no, like he's just like, he's
[00:08:40] toxically masculine. That sounds like that's actually a crime you need to interrupt. Yeah.
[00:08:45] Like, do you need a minute to go under the bed and? Well, I mean, I spend a lot of time under the
[00:08:51] bed. I've already been over there for like 10 hours today hiding from Republicans and stuff.
[00:08:57] Right. And from being, you know, all these guys talking about canceled culture all these
[00:09:04] times. Yeah. Cancel culture. Not real. Not real yuck. I just want to just I just want to say,
[00:09:10] I was this many years old when I learned that Caitlyn, well, it was okay, like being complicit
[00:09:17] in this X crime. Wow. I mean, look, they're Anna, they're cats, but like, I and I'm allergic to
[00:09:24] them. I don't particularly like them, but I just think it's really problematic to kind of
[00:09:28] swipe that under the bed, so to speak. Right. Yeah. I mean, to me, it's like, I don't know,
[00:09:36] I'm struggling with that. So I'm reckoning with this because it's like, you know, am I using my
[00:09:41] human privilege to dictate what they should be doing? Yeah, I would say, I mean, to me,
[00:09:47] it's like, you shouldn't have to be reckoning with this. Is it okay that I'm playing a totally
[00:09:50] passive aggressive person? Is that like throwing everything off? Like an improv? You're not supposed
[00:09:54] to like, we love it. Okay. So like, I wish, well, I'm torn because like, I half admire you for
[00:09:59] struggling with that, but I also think it's kind of like almost pathological that it has to be a
[00:10:05] struggle. Like, why would you even have to wonder? You know, and I'm just saying this like from a
[00:10:09] space of love and support and curiosity, like no judgment. I'm just wondering like where your
[00:10:15] humanity is when you can't tell whether or not you're imposing your human privilege over cats.
[00:10:23] Mm. I'm really, I'm going to have to dissect that. You know, my human privilege runs deep.
[00:10:29] I can't believe you just said dissect because that's like really triggering for animals.
[00:10:33] Yeah, especially the day. Pretty violent. Yeah. Yeah. It's pretty. Yeah. I think that we
[00:10:38] should take a step back and examine our own language and just, you know, make sure that we're not
[00:10:43] inflicting violence on one another with our words. Right. Yeah, I actually, I was thinking about
[00:10:49] canceling myself. Yeah. I mean, don't you, I feel like you should let either julier me cancel you.
[00:10:57] Yeah. Like that would be the solid or a stick thing to do. And honestly, as you know, the person
[00:11:03] who is not Jewish and therefore has more privilege than Katie, I would defer to Katie on whether or
[00:11:09] not she should cancel you because ultimately that's not my place to speak for Jewish women.
[00:11:15] Right. No, I really appreciate that. I really appreciate that. Like
[00:11:18] every now and then you guys are able to like see past your Goyaisha privilege. So I just want
[00:11:24] to like celebrate you for a second. Thank you. And I'm going to just check in with a two second
[00:11:29] body scan. I think we don't need to cancel Kate. Okay. But I do think she's on notice.
[00:11:35] She is on notice and human privilege runs deep. I mean, it's like in everything that I do,
[00:11:41] I can literally never get rid of it. I'm just, there's just layers and layers and layers of
[00:11:46] this that I could spend my entire life working through. And I would still
[00:11:52] you know, there's still a few entitled, I think to, you know, to being, for example,
[00:11:57] the one who sleeps in the bed and you know, eats at the table, you know, just like my cats are just,
[00:12:02] you know, beneath me or whatever. So I mean, I'm just, I'm reckoning with this. I'm really
[00:12:06] reckoning with this. It's hard. This is a really important conversation. And I'm so glad that
[00:12:12] we're getting it on, on the air, because there's, there are so many people who just need to hear
[00:12:18] this. We are, you know, as, you know, I do want to acknowledge that all three of us are white and
[00:12:24] therefore on stolen land, on stolen land. And therefore we have privilege, we will not be inviting
[00:12:32] anyone else to comment on that. But, but we do want to acknowledge that we are white women on
[00:12:37] stolen land. Thank you. White hyphen Jewish, right. Ashkenazek, not like Mizrahi, which really, I have
[00:12:46] to claim my white Jewish, you know, I've not claimed sorry for be it for me to claim it. I have to
[00:12:50] acknowledge it. Yeah. I'm gonna go with white hyphen Italian, because you know, my, my ancestors,
[00:12:59] they were white, but also very trashy. So yeah. I'm just, I'm just gonna stick with white, because
[00:13:09] you're tall. I understand. I'm tall. You're good looking. You know, thank you so much. I really
[00:13:13] appreciate that. I'm sorry for objectifying you. You know, I mean, I find that like, yeah,
[00:13:17] no, let me, we're trying to space you. Oh, thank you so much. I know that, you know, as a society,
[00:13:23] well, Kate, thank you for saying that you think that I'm good looking, but we have to acknowledge
[00:13:27] as a society, we prioritize, you know, white Eurocentric features, which I have. I kind of feel like
[00:13:35] you're being homophobic towards me. Okay. Yeah. Like that's like really, oh, right. That's true.
[00:13:41] My lived experience is like, I find you attractive. And you know, I'm so sad too, because you're a
[00:13:49] woman. Like that's not, you're not allowed. Like it's almost as if this toxic masculinity
[00:13:55] should be relegated to the male gaze realm. Yeah. And gaze of course, not gaze and straits.
[00:14:01] I just still feel bad that my one cat is looking at my other cat with the male gaze under the
[00:14:05] bat right now. Well, maybe, I mean, are you maybe like denying the other cast agency? Like maybe
[00:14:11] there is like gender, you know, role play like they're being subversive. That's true. My cats are
[00:14:17] doing BDSM. Oh my God, you guys all understand. I'm so sorry for cake shaming you. And they are,
[00:14:23] as far as I know, brother and sister. So we have to hold the space for that incestuous
[00:14:31] relationship. Yeah. Because you know, on the, you know, coming back around to,
[00:14:38] is it okay? Is it okay to be in the same sex relationship with your father? Yeah, exactly.
[00:14:46] I can be in the same sex relationship with your dad. Right. You know what I'm saying?
[00:14:51] Mm hmm. Like in fact, I sometimes I that's how I identify. Like I some days I wake up and I'm like,
[00:14:59] I am a man dating Kate Willett's father. Right. That's how I identify. Like, I actually think
[00:15:05] that that might be that might be going on with my dad. I don't know. Yeah. Well, I mean, there's
[00:15:10] some there's yeah, there's some of called trust and yeah, you know, like, like, um, you know,
[00:15:17] crisis daddy Andrew Cuomo says, you know, I am a Jew. I am a Muslim. I am gay. I am black.
[00:15:27] I'm a woman. It's just sex and horror reproductive freedom. This is upsetting because, you know,
[00:15:32] this was like a, you know, this was like a, this was like a hard day for me seeing someone cancel
[00:15:40] gay Muslim man. Andrew, I know. It's a hard day for everyone. I mean, as he is a Jew, he's a woman.
[00:15:46] So it's hard to adhere to a woman seeking to control her body. That's right. That's what it is. Yeah.
[00:15:51] And nobody can prevent him from identifying that way. No. And he's a woman seeking to control
[00:15:56] other women's bodies and cupping their breasts. Right. You know, that's like, whereas I actually
[00:16:02] really feel for him, because I think a lot of people mistakenly cast that as sexual harassment
[00:16:06] as opposed to a kind of like, I'm going to go old school again, but almost like my body,
[00:16:11] my choice, our bodies ourselves kind of orientation where it's really much more about owning the
[00:16:19] feminine space that is your own body when you're Andrew Cuomo. Yes. Yeah. That's true. Right. I
[00:16:25] think like, I've been wanting to say this for so long and no one else will go there. Right.
[00:16:29] Even though I think it's honestly, I think for some people, it's very, it's like on the tip of
[00:16:34] their psyches, for other people, they're just too like their their view of the world is too gender.
[00:16:42] But I think that if we all look back and took a step and kind of like stepped outside of the
[00:16:47] patriarchal cis normative lens, we would see that what Cuomo was doing was actually pretty
[00:16:55] beautiful. I mean, it was like, it was really, it was a rejection of so many paradigms.
[00:17:03] Yeah. I mean, to me, the whole thing that I feel like this discussion about Andrew Cuomo
[00:17:08] has missed is like, you know, there are so many men out there that are, you know, grabbing boobs
[00:17:16] and butts and all of them are culturally appropriating Italians. You know, yeah, I don't think that
[00:17:25] Andrew Cuomo, like, I mean, he's just, you know, he's, he's living his truth. Yeah. Well, you know,
[00:17:31] as the least ethnic woman in, in this, this triad, I, I do have a different lived experience in
[00:17:41] which no one in my family has ever even hugged. So I find any touch to be violent and violence.
[00:17:50] Yeah. Right. But I mean, I feel like you're actually in that you're less than dating Andrew
[00:17:54] Cuomo than you are your own kind of Christo puritanical, sanitized family structure in which
[00:18:05] intimacy is so frowned on. I almost feel like you were calling yourself out and normal normalizing
[00:18:12] Andrew Cuomo. And I'm reckoning with that and reveling because I don't actually know where
[00:18:18] I come down on that. I'm gonna have to like check in later about this, but I'm getting like all
[00:18:24] sorts of feelings in my body that are just, there's something that's like just not okay with that.
[00:18:29] Okay. But, but at the same time, when I look at it through like a Combahee River collective gaze,
[00:18:37] there's something really redemptive. Redemptive. Okay. That totally makes sense. Right. I'm not
[00:18:43] lying. It makes sense. I don't know that I would ever normalize the way that Italians,
[00:18:50] Italian Americans, um, express affection and intimacy, but, um, but you know what, that could
[00:18:57] be subconsciously saying something. I was gonna say you'd never consciously normalize it, right?
[00:19:01] That's that you're almost actually proving my thesis because that would be kind of like
[00:19:07] definitionally impossible. Right. So the very premise of my of my thesis is that it would be
[00:19:12] subconscious. And yeah, I mean, to me, like my whole thing with Italians, like, if I think about
[00:19:18] the reason that Italians face so much hate in our culture, you know, it's because they're always
[00:19:23] like making the spaghetti and like, you know, eats in the pizza. And it's like, yeah. Okay.
[00:19:29] That is, you know, it's people are just really like so quick to body shame anyone for eating
[00:19:36] carbohydrates. And I think that we need to normalize carbohydrates again. You know,
[00:19:43] yeah. How could we do that though? Like I feel like it's so that it's almost like
[00:19:46] imagine a world without racism. Like what would that even look like?
[00:19:49] Um, maybe we would all be eating the pizza or making the spaghetti. Yeah. So I mean,
[00:19:56] I'm also calling into question my own, um, complicity in anti-Italian violence because I've
[00:20:03] been eating pizza and pasta my entire life. And is that like cultural appropriation? Should I
[00:20:08] seek an okay from the Italian Americans in my life? Or is that turning you guys into a monolith?
[00:20:14] Like, I don't know how to repair the damage I've done because my consumption of pizza and pasta has
[00:20:19] been pretty. I mean, it just speaks to the non-Italian privilege I have that I have never
[00:20:24] been thought about how problematic it was. Yeah. I mean, the thing about like, um, you know,
[00:20:30] like everyone is kind of, um, not, you know, not aware enough of their Italian privilege. It's like,
[00:20:35] you know, people just go around, um, you know, reading books and stuff. It'll be non-Italian
[00:20:42] privilege. Yeah, non-Italian privilege. People just go around like doing things that like,
[00:20:46] you know, Italians can never do like, like reading books and like, um, you know,
[00:20:53] like more cerebral thing. Yeah. Like my week. And I like, like, is that, I don't want to say
[00:20:57] anything about Italians not being cerebral. Yeah. I mean, is that what you were saying? Yeah. It's
[00:21:02] like, you know, like as Italians, okay, like, you know, we're not, um, you know, we're not able to,
[00:21:08] to do things like, um, like we can't put together furniture. Yeah. That's not a stereotype. That's
[00:21:14] my lived truth. Okay. Um, uh, yes. I don't want to, I want to hold space for this conversation because
[00:21:23] it's so vital to our understanding of each other. Um, but on this topic of, um, you know, Italian
[00:21:32] Americans who have been just unjustly vilified. I do think that we have to discuss, um, you know,
[00:21:41] girl boss in chief Nancy Pelosi. Well, I just want to,
[00:21:44] I'm a bit, I'm a fan before we get into Nancy Pelosi for a minute. I do just want to, you know,
[00:21:49] complete this conversation really quick. Um, that I would say,
[00:21:53] Can you thread the needle? Yeah. I'll thread the needle because like, I feel like a lot of the
[00:21:57] reason that people feel all right, making fun of Italian Americans is because we kiss our relatives
[00:22:05] right on the mouth. And, um, ultimately we live in a culture where, um, most people are not
[00:22:14] bringing awareness to the topic of being gay with your dad, which is why we do this podcast.
[00:22:20] Right. You know, everyone loves to kink shame. And, yeah. Yeah. And you know what that stops here
[00:22:26] today. And now, yeah, we celebrate all love, including same sex relationships with your father.
[00:22:35] Yeah. Rob, because that has really been excluded from the discourse. I mean, I don't know. You can,
[00:22:41] yeah, I don't think you can call yourself intersectional and, um, kind of gloss over
[00:22:47] the, uh, those kinds of relationships. I mean, actually, I ultimately, you know,
[00:22:52] I think that we'll see a future, um, where potentially everyone is in a same sex relationship with
[00:22:58] their father. That's right. With your father. I, I'm like, I'm sorry. I'm really attached to the
[00:23:02] idea of it being with your father, but not just because of my own personal. That's like my personal
[00:23:07] live trauma, my intergenerational trauma. Yeah. It's like how I feel about, um, you know,
[00:23:13] being in a relationship with, um, your mom, you know, right? Yeah. I was going to say, I mean,
[00:23:18] that's fair. That's fair. Honestly, if I'm going to be able to, like, if I'm going to interrogate, um,
[00:23:23] that on your end with your dad, then I have to actually, you know, I have to walk the walk. I
[00:23:29] can't just talk it's off. Yeah. It's like, you know, I think one thing that never really gets
[00:23:34] discussed, um, in comedy, um, you know, like, obviously, you know, people are bringing a lot of
[00:23:40] new consciousness to, um, you know, the various ways in which, um, comedy can be a tool of the
[00:23:46] oppressor. Um, but yeah, we have people just dropping your mom jokes all the time. You know,
[00:23:54] I fucked your mom, your mom was so I'm actually dropped your mom last night, which is fine. Yeah.
[00:23:59] Yeah. Well, I mean, the thing is, the mom joke is what's wrong with having sex with your mom.
[00:24:03] Nothing, you know, like love is love is love is love. Yeah. Yeah. I have like 12 bumper stickers.
[00:24:10] Let's say that. And honestly, I do feel like the, I do feel that the LGBT plus community has become,
[00:24:17] you know, the LGBT community, D standing for your dad, your dad. Right. Well, I do.
[00:24:24] You II right. And I do feel that the reason why, you know, the D is not a household name yet is
[00:24:31] just because, um, of the like really corporate and sometimes violent, um, infrastructure that the
[00:24:38] community bill has subscribed to over the years. Yeah. You know, who doesn't want you to be gay
[00:24:47] with your dad capital one? Right. That's right. Yeah. Who does want you to be gay with your dad?
[00:24:53] We do. We do. That's why we started a podcast about having a same sex relationship with your
[00:24:58] father. Yeah. It's time to normalize it. It's time to stop the case today. Yeah. Yeah. Um,
[00:25:05] all right. So we want to move on to the Nancy Pelosi's top girl boss moments.
[00:25:10] Yes. I think that sounds really, it sounds so good. Um, sounds really juicy. So Julia, what's
[00:25:16] your faith? Okay. There are so many because she is like, of course, the queen of shade and
[00:25:23] she's just done so many like incredible girl boss, um, just acts of defiance. Like the time where she
[00:25:32] said, um, this is just one of them. The time where she said that the Democratic party should welcome
[00:25:40] people who are anti choice. Um, I think that was a girl boss moment, um, to actually like reclaim
[00:25:48] the idea of women not having ownership over their body. Um, I think that was really brave.
[00:25:54] Okay. And yet simultaneously be inclusive of women who do have ownership of their bodies.
[00:26:01] You know, right? Well, I'm just actually, as I'm saying this, I'm just like so uncomfortable
[00:26:05] with the word ownership. I feel like that is like, yeah, it's really like,
[00:26:09] it's like, I'm in a way, right? Yeah. No, I feel like it just only okay to use
[00:26:16] in a same sex relationship with your dad. Yeah. Yes. Right. I mean, I, I don't think an
[00:26:21] interracial same sex relationship with your dad though, um, lends itself to that. Like,
[00:26:26] I think we have to be really conscious and aware of that. And I think it speaks to like a strong
[00:26:31] white privilege, um, that exists among, um, same sex, dad on child relationship. So we can't look
[00:26:39] at gender without looking at race. And if you do that, you're, of course, not truly intersectional.
[00:26:44] And I feel like if Kimberly crunch, I'll work here, she'd be really, um, triggered. And we, we,
[00:26:52] I mean, she's not here and she's being gaslit because like you don't need to be here to be
[00:26:57] gaslit. We, you know, like, oh my God, we've got a true falls. Yeah. It's true. It falls. And no one
[00:27:02] hears it doesn't make a sound. Well, what we, we don't know that. But what we do know is that if
[00:27:06] you gaslight someone, they're not here, they are gaslit. Yeah. And if I, if I think about it,
[00:27:11] really by saying that you have to be physically present or at least in communications to be
[00:27:16] gaslit, I mean, that's a form of gay keeping. So yeah, and ableism. Yes. I mean, I, I think it's
[00:27:22] actually interesting that you didn't see right away that it was ableist. Um, I think you may want
[00:27:26] to like just reflect on that and see what that, what that brings up for you because you may find
[00:27:31] out a lot about yourself. Um, but yeah, gay keeping too. Um, ableist, gay keeping, which is actually
[00:27:38] a very hard thing to do. I learned a hard way. Oh, well, not everyone is physically able to
[00:27:46] gatekeep and we need to make space for that. And you know what? I want to say, I want to say,
[00:27:53] Kate and Nudgers, Kate and Nudgers. Yeah. Katie, Katie, I just want to thank you for calling me in
[00:28:00] on the language that I didn't realize I was using that was problematic. And, um, you know, again,
[00:28:07] that is my, that is my, my privilege. Uh, blindness as a just, uh, plain old white woman, uh,
[00:28:15] white comma parentheses, nothing. Okay, but when you call yourself a plain old white woman,
[00:28:20] okay, that is, um, ageism old blinds. We're doing some more ableist language. Yeah. And plain,
[00:28:26] it's like you're not acknowledging your hot privilege. Oh my gosh. Also, there's like the planes and
[00:28:31] like native Americans and that's also like stolen land. We are on stolen land, which includes planes.
[00:28:37] So I'm just again, like I'm really, you know, it's, it's a hard, it's a fine line to walk because I
[00:28:44] want to congratulate and I want to like salute your guys's efforts, but I also don't want to be
[00:28:52] complicit. Um, and I don't want to cater to, um, assumptions. So I'm just really
[00:28:58] reckoning with that. And so if I look checked out, um, that's what it is. So, you know, sometimes I,
[00:29:06] I, I may need to like go for a walk. And, uh, sometimes people are like, why aren't you in front of your
[00:29:12] mic and camera doing a podcast? And they don't realize that they're actually being really ableist
[00:29:16] because that's the way I have to let off steam. Sometimes I have to walk around and like,
[00:29:22] I, you know, like chocolate sometimes is like required for me to feel better. So
[00:29:28] I actually, I feel like really naked and exposed right now. I'm sorry. I don't know if that was too
[00:29:32] much. I actually really love when people are vulnerable, you know? Okay, great. I needed to hear
[00:29:38] that girl boss, Brenna Brown, you know, she's like, really been so inspirational to me. Like that is,
[00:29:43] I mean, ever since I like found her work, I've just been crying at all times, um, in front of
[00:29:48] everyone. Because if you're, if you're not crying, you're not paying attention. Yeah, exactly. So true.
[00:29:54] I mean, except if you're mad, then sometimes it's okay to not be crying, yeah, when you're
[00:29:59] outraged or even out like yeah, if you're yelling, um, yeah, then that that's okay. Unless the person
[00:30:06] that you're yelling at is not a straight white man. Um, that's it's only okay. Yeah, yeah. In which
[00:30:12] case you should be yelling at yourself. I mean, really, are we living at an age though where, I mean,
[00:30:17] in terms of like, um, yelling, you know, I'm like, I've been operating like it's only cool to yell
[00:30:23] at straight white guys, but are you know, are we kind of like, um, are we missing something? Like,
[00:30:28] is it time to examine as a culture of whether we should be yelling it more white women, just white
[00:30:34] women? Yeah, I don't know. These are the really tough questions. Yeah. No, I mean, I think the
[00:30:38] Karen, Karen, the Karenocracy has really complicated that and it actually, it calls on all of us to
[00:30:45] really check our, our white privilege. And be yelling at all times. Yeah. Yeah. If you're not
[00:30:52] yelling, uh, you're not paying attention. And if you're not yelling at white women,
[00:30:56] you're not paying attention. And you're complicit. You're complicit. Your style, your silence is
[00:31:02] complicit. If you are a white man, yelling, if you're a cis white man and you're yelling at a white
[00:31:08] woman, then that is. And it could be a care. It's violence, unless it's a Karen intervention. Yeah.
[00:31:15] And you are like bearing witness to someone else who's being Karen, in which case you're
[00:31:19] actually being an ally. Yeah. And in which case, you're not yelling is violence. Wow. Yeah.
[00:31:25] I think Katie, this is why I find our conversations so valuable.
[00:31:30] We can be amazing. Valuable and thrilling. Again, I just you, um, open my eyes just,
[00:31:36] just so many things. Off there go using, we're go using using
[00:31:40] using, you know, we're, we're everyone, we all struggle and we're not born with this vocabulary.
[00:31:47] And again, I just want to salute everyone and son salute everyone. Oh my God, Katie,
[00:31:53] son salute. Wow. You're doing cultural appropriation right now. Well, actually,
[00:32:01] I meant so and salute because I'm actually centering the male, same sex dad, the male son relationship.
[00:32:08] So I was talking about some so and but I think it's interesting that you kind of projected your own
[00:32:14] fetishization of the East. I mean, I would really love for you to take a look at Edward Said's
[00:32:21] Orientalism book because I think that like that opus could really help you. Um, because you haven't
[00:32:26] done the work that like Julia or I have done. And I say that I don't know if Julia is read
[00:32:31] Orientalism, but like she's read it. You know what I mean? Like you may not have read it, but you've
[00:32:37] read it. And Kate, I don't mean like, okay, now that I'm saying this, look, I'm actually,
[00:32:42] I have to look at myself because I realized that there's such a, there's so much history of Italian
[00:32:48] as, I mean, you said it yourself. I think I said cerebral, but I was picking up what you were saying.
[00:32:56] And I just realized that like, it is problematic for a Jewish person to ever accuse an Italian
[00:33:01] person of not having read something. So I want to like apologize to you. Thank you. That really
[00:33:07] means a lot to me. I accept your apology. I don't know that I necessarily feel safe, but I do accept
[00:33:17] your apology. I mean, yeah, I want to thank you as a Jew because Jews as, as like, you know,
[00:33:24] before, let's say 1948, the threatening Jew didn't really exist in the collective conscience,
[00:33:31] consciousness, the discourse. So I actually feel like you are saying something really
[00:33:37] subversive by suggesting that an Italian, I mean, you are, you are speaking to both
[00:33:41] and Italian, you are, you are basically blowing up two stereotypes, one of the feeble Jew and the
[00:33:48] book Italian. So I just think that like, it's one of those things where you, once you start dismantling
[00:33:54] one system of privilege, like once you start blowing up one stereotype, you really disrupt the entire
[00:34:00] paradigm. And so you're, you're doing more work than you even realize, like you are, you are challenging
[00:34:06] Italian phobic things and Jewish anti-Semitic things at the same time. Thank you. That's actually,
[00:34:12] you know, that's a big part of my purpose. I really appreciate that. Now I can see that. I mean,
[00:34:16] I mean, like, if you'd asked me about you five minutes ago, I would have said like,
[00:34:20] cancel Kate. Yeah. Ashtag cancel Kate. I actually scripted the tweet. But now that I realize like,
[00:34:26] you're actually, you're kind of, you're, you're just, I don't know, my thing about other things,
[00:34:32] my thing about like, how we're just like saying that we're going to cancel people is it's like,
[00:34:38] canceling isn't a real thing. It's not like cancel culture is not real. It's not real. At the same
[00:34:43] time, we need to do it to everyone. So it's not real. And like, yeah, it's not real. And I think
[00:34:49] we should be like, literally, like, so I just want to like tap into lean into my culture. And as,
[00:34:56] as you guys probably don't know, there is on, you know, Passover. So there would be Xs on the
[00:35:04] non Jewish households. And that's something I really kind of want to lean into. And I don't,
[00:35:09] cancel culture is not real. And and for that reason, I think it's really important to find the home
[00:35:15] addresses of problematic male writers and just put an X in front of their house. Because that,
[00:35:23] I believe if I'm remembering my culture correctly, that's so that the angel of death doesn't stop.
[00:35:29] Bye. So wait, sorry, maybe we put Xs on everyone's house, but the the toxic mal
[00:35:35] my point is, I think we need to prove how if there were cancellation, we wouldn't have to do this,
[00:35:39] but because there's no real cancel culture and there's no accountability. We actually have to do
[00:35:43] that. Yeah, I actually prefer to term accountability culture. Okay, yeah, that's important to me. Yeah,
[00:35:48] let's just use that now on. You know, it's facing consequences for your actions, you know, yes.
[00:35:56] Yeah, I give your money to Sean King women or women identifying Sean King. I mean, I was
[00:36:07] Sean Queen actually, like a year ago, I would have been all up like saying like everyone,
[00:36:12] you know, give your money to Planned Parenthood, but they were not willing to give my cat an abortion.
[00:36:18] This is that they don't like well, was that just because of their like,
[00:36:23] did they just not have the like, were they literally unable to unpack the appropriate toolbox to
[00:36:29] mix metaphors? Like, I think maybe they just didn't have the, the, you know, I mean,
[00:36:35] it was a house to the master's house with his tools. Yeah, I think it was a place to display
[00:36:39] of human privilege. You know, yeah. I mean, and to be fair, even if it wasn't because of that,
[00:36:45] their lack of sensitivity towards that basically is the same thing. So it's either gross and
[00:36:50] sensitivity or it's actually worse than its cataphobia. Yeah. Well, I have to struggle with that as
[00:36:56] someone who's very allergic to them and doesn't find them cute. Wow, I mean, really, yeah,
[00:37:02] that's I'm really glad to hear that you're working on that because I do find that like,
[00:37:06] that language pretty species species. Right. And you know, that's just the kind of thing that
[00:37:13] we're not really about here on the show. Right. And I, this is a show about being in the same
[00:37:18] sex relationship with your father. With your dad. Yeah. Father. Yes. I also, I want to like,
[00:37:22] call myself out because I want you guys to really hold me accountable to this. But I
[00:37:27] credentialize myself because I have such a great relationship with dogs. Wow. And I kind of,
[00:37:33] I'm, you know, I use that to, to almost like justify my troubled dynamic with cats. You know what I'm
[00:37:42] saying? Because I get along with dogs and I sent her dogs and I'm in a really intense relationship
[00:37:47] with a dog, Bodie. That doesn't mean I know the dog experience. And that certainly doesn't mean
[00:37:52] I know the cat experience. In fact, I think that there's some, humans don't realize this, but there's
[00:37:57] a lot of like intra animal divide and conquer stuff. So like my, my, I want being such a dog
[00:38:04] ally actually kind of pits me against cats. Okay. I just, to me, it's like all animals are,
[00:38:12] you know, equal. As long as they're vegan, my cats, they have to be vegan, you know,
[00:38:18] or else what happens? Or else they're doing violence. They're doing violence. And yes,
[00:38:22] are they technically malnourished? Yes. If they're vegan ones. Yeah.
[00:38:29] I mean, but their bodies, their choices. If you're, if you're not malnourished, you're not paying
[00:38:33] attention. That's right. And honestly, if you're not in like a body shaming way, right? If you're not,
[00:38:39] if you're not malnourished. Oh, well, you see, it's like that, like history just has his in there.
[00:38:46] I feel like male nourished. I don't know. Like to me, that feels like a joke that I did not consent
[00:38:53] to. Oh, wow. Yeah. Wow. That was just like, yeah. And I'm okay. I'm a survivor. And I'm going to say
[00:39:01] that we need to stop this right here. And I actually, I need to feel safe. And I think we need to
[00:39:07] return to Nancy Pelosi's top girl boss moments. That's like be grounded. Yeah. I think the body
[00:39:13] keeps the score. Yeah. That's right. We do need to ground ourselves in something right now. And
[00:39:18] I think in Nancy Pelosi's top girl boss moments in Nancy Pelosi's ground ourselves in Nancy Pelosi.
[00:39:22] That's right. Yes. Which I did to both of your mom's eyes to be fair.
[00:39:28] Absolutely. And that which I would say that's sex positive ultimately.
[00:39:33] It's so, yeah. And I would really invite you guys to not deprive your mothers of their sexual
[00:39:39] agency. Yeah. I mean, at the same time, you know, like, we're not the driving mothers of our sexual
[00:39:45] of their sexual agency. But at the same time, like, this is a podcast that centers the experience
[00:39:50] of being in a same sex relationship with your father. You know, sometimes we can't talk about
[00:39:54] everything at the same time. There's only so much time. Right. It's okay. You know, we're all
[00:39:59] like there is a role approaching your mom jokes, right? Yeah. And not of your dad. So we are,
[00:40:04] this is reparations in a way. Yeah. Oh, wow. Okay. I don't even know how to go there. Wow. Wow.
[00:40:11] Well, yeah. I mean, that's why it's like when you have what sometimes I don't mean to sound like
[00:40:15] cisgender, like cisphobe, cis cis normative. But I do feel like having like three women together,
[00:40:23] like unlocks a lot of there's like a lot of untapped chakra that comes from three, the power of three.
[00:40:29] I mean, this is ultimately just a community of women supporting women by canceling each other.
[00:40:35] Yeah, that's right. And that's why we love it. We love it. Holding each other accountable.
[00:40:39] Oh, yes. Holding each other accountable. They want us to say canceling. But yeah,
[00:40:42] that's really an attempt. That's all it is. No. All right. Nancy Pelosi.
[00:40:48] No, that's a woman that I never want to face consequences. I mean, and she doesn't
[00:40:53] because no, she doesn't. And that is a slay that she never faces consequences for her actions.
[00:41:04] One of them that I loved personally, I thought it was so funny when she called the Green Deal,
[00:41:10] the Green Dream or whatever. Yeah. I mean, and just to clarify, like,
[00:41:16] or whatever is not Julia editorializing, it's actually, she's called it the Green Dream or whatever.
[00:41:21] And quote, yeah. My only problem of that is that I will agree that that was an absolute
[00:41:28] slave for Nancy Pelosi. But, you know, was she who were the victims? Who were the victims?
[00:41:35] Ultimately. Yeah, I mean, to me, it's like, was she
[00:41:40] no, what's she throwing shade to a woman of color? You know, should we be celebrating this?
[00:41:44] A couple of men of color, a whole squad. It was squad. Right. Yeah. She was squat.
[00:41:48] Right. And on their space, right. On Stonewall Land. But at the same time,
[00:41:53] it's confusing because she was also throwing shade to add Markey, who is a white man.
[00:41:59] Right. That's this white man. Yeah. That's this white man. Yeah.
[00:42:01] And who's transitioned, by the way, he transitioned because he was not always progressive. He was
[00:42:06] a much more centrist, but he now progressive identifies. And I mean, you know, it's a little late in his
[00:42:12] career, but like, who am I? We can't hold people. That's a ridiculous thing to say because there's
[00:42:17] so much pressure to be centrist. And like these days, younger people, like, will come out as
[00:42:23] progressive, younger and younger. And that's great. It's like really controversial. And we need to
[00:42:27] hold the space for that. But who are we to judge people? Not everyone is as like, it was raised
[00:42:34] by accepting families and things have changed and he's older. So I just want to like, welcome him.
[00:42:39] Yeah. I do, of course, want to hold space for our assist white male ally, Ed Markey.
[00:42:46] Right. Non-b- politically non-binary. He's not allowed to define himself as an ally.
[00:42:51] But we can define him as a girl. Yeah. But yes, ultimately, Nancy Pelosi was
[00:42:58] throwing shade at him as well. Looking, you know, snatched while doing it, I'm sure.
[00:43:08] Also, I love to win she the time, the numerous times when she said that she
[00:43:13] is not a fan of Medicare for all and never then things that will never happen.
[00:43:20] Yeah. Can I just ask a question for everyone who's out there and a fan for
[00:43:23] Medicare for all? Is that going to end racism? Wow. That is such a good point.
[00:43:30] Yeah. It's not going to end racism. So like, why bother? So why? Yeah.
[00:43:36] I mean, if it's not going to end racism, then Medicare for all is actually
[00:43:43] tacitly racist. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I would almost say overtly racist. I mean,
[00:43:47] somewhere between tacit and overt. We can't just be giving cis white men medical care. No.
[00:43:55] Right. I mean, that's what and ultimately, when you do things based on class, what you're doing is,
[00:44:00] you know, whether it's Medicare for all minimum wage, we all know that, you know,
[00:44:05] most minimum wage earners are straight white men of significant means. So that's right.
[00:44:11] When we, you know, unless you're like, micro targeting and like micro threading that needle,
[00:44:18] you're really not going to be challenging any systemic oppression.
[00:44:24] So right. Anyway, I'm sorry. I totally disrupted that. Like, if I were straight white
[00:44:30] male, you would totally want to cancel me for that interruption. But I think that maybe like,
[00:44:34] I'm really appreciating that you are holding the space for my taking the space as a Jewish woman.
[00:44:39] I mean, as a Jewish woman, it's really like, you know, I'm just trying to live laugh, love,
[00:44:45] and listen, you know, you now Jewish identify. I said Jewish. No, you are like, you are like,
[00:44:51] I just like, you are a Jewish woman. I'm trying to live laugh, love, and listen to you, you know.
[00:44:58] I say, okay. So, okay, I'm going to go ahead.
[00:45:04] You should get your girl, by the way, get your girl, Joy Behar, who is not Jewish and
[00:45:08] engages in cultural appropriation. She's Italian. And yeah, that's really, we're not happy about
[00:45:13] that. She I had no this is really in you face. She's in you face. She wears you face. Yeah.
[00:45:19] This is not a really shocking to me. I had no idea. I'm not. I mean, and honestly, this is,
[00:45:27] this is my problem that I haven't been really keeping up with the discourse of the view.
[00:45:33] And I had no idea that Joy Behar was not a chosen woman. And that is really problematic
[00:45:42] for both her and for me. And that shows what I need to work on. Right. Right. That you weren't
[00:45:50] attuned to that. I'm going to go ahead and say that my favorite
[00:45:54] advocacy girl, boss moment was when Pelosi said to Donald Trump, that the wall
[00:46:02] is like a manhood thing for him as if manhood could ever be associated with him. Because, you know,
[00:46:09] when I think of the way that undocumented people are treated in this country, I immediately go to
[00:46:17] like toxic masculinity. You know, I mean, that is the problem. Yes. And that's why she's the queen
[00:46:24] of shade, because she just looks at a really complex issue. And instead of making a complex
[00:46:30] analysis, she just does the only person. Yeah, totally. Which actually literally this every time
[00:46:38] you do that. Yeah, exactly. The wall is eroded. I mean, I'm undocumented people come in. I don't
[00:46:43] think so. Yeah. Hmm. Just saying, right. Well, oh, sorry. I have my own, but keep going because
[00:46:51] I'm just like, I feel really invited, called in to share my own. No, what is your
[00:46:59] advice? I don't know. You bet. Please tell us. Well, I really, yeah, maybe we can cut some of
[00:47:05] these in, by the way, the audio, because that would be just like so good to like bear witness
[00:47:10] to what she said. Let's do it. So yes. Yeah. I listen to it every morning when I rise and
[00:47:15] grind. Also, it's like trigger warning. We are going to hear it's like one queen references another
[00:47:22] queen. And also, of course, we haven't even unpacked the monarchist implications of that.
[00:47:28] That terminology. Okay. But, you know, we'll do that. There's only so much we can do on show.
[00:47:34] Ten states, as I said, on Friday, I started their early voting the day that we lost Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
[00:47:42] But to be clear, you're not taking any arrows out of your quiver. You're not ruling anything out.
[00:47:49] Good morning. Sunday morning. We have a responsibility. We take notes to protect and defend the
[00:47:57] constitution of the United States. It's an amazing moment because what she's doing is she's
[00:48:03] literally interrupting and disrupting the male voice, not just the male gaze, but the male voice.
[00:48:08] And good morning, Sunday morning. A lot of people thought that was kind of like incoherent. But what
[00:48:14] that really was is a really deeply feminist kind of Virginia, Wolfian, use of language, a rejection
[00:48:23] of the patriarchal linear narrative, a kind of postmodern, you know, free association, nonlinear
[00:48:35] disruption. Good morning, Sunday morning. You know, she's like challenging just the very
[00:48:41] very chronological, logical normative narrative that we hear usually, like just good morning.
[00:48:48] But good morning, Sunday morning is she's actually it's a tribute to Virginia Wolf and Emily Dickinson.
[00:48:54] Oh, wow. Near near rhyme and flat rhyme. Oh, beautiful. That's so wonderful.
[00:48:59] Yeah, I mean, my only problem with Nancy Pelosi is that she's not the literal president.
[00:49:06] If she was the president, oh my God, I mean, everything would be so amazing. We would be,
[00:49:13] you know, there would be no problems anymore. There would be, first of all, I mean,
[00:49:16] it goes with that thing. There would be no racism. There would be no sexism.
[00:49:21] sexism, right? Italians would feel free. Italians would finally feel free.
[00:49:25] First time. Yeah, we would be eaten our spaghetti.
[00:49:29] Right. Like without feeling. Yeah, without feeling executed.
[00:49:33] Because you guys do do that, but you just feel in threat. You feel unsafe when you do that.
[00:49:37] I know, yeah, I the only person that I love more than Nancy Pelosi is
[00:49:48] it's today we have to celebrate a very, very special person. Because do you guys know what
[00:49:55] do you guys know what this anniversary is that we're celebrating?
[00:50:00] I don't want to. I would rather give you the space to tell us that.
[00:50:04] Okay, today is the three year and two month anniversary of the greatest comedy special of all time.
[00:50:15] Nanette. Oh my God. Oh, wait, one second before, sorry, before we, I just want to, like,
[00:50:20] if we could hold the space for like literally one minute, I just want to also give Nancy Pelosi
[00:50:26] like, slay queen cred for when she clapped, I don't know, like probably the most disruptive
[00:50:32] feminist. It was like the closest thing that we've seen to direct action that any elected
[00:50:38] speaker of the house has ever done. When she did know we were doing that.
[00:50:42] When she, I mean, you say weird little clap because I think that some of the misogyny that's
[00:50:47] rampant in our society has rubbed off on you. That's true. I would say that clap of liberation
[00:50:52] and defiance. That was basically the 21st century equivalent of chaining yourself to a fence,
[00:51:00] to protest segregation or putting yourselves together in front of like, you know, a nuclear
[00:51:09] stockpile, basically just right in front of the A bomb. What she did there, which, you know,
[00:51:18] what's funny is that if you're not kind of like, if you're not woke, if you're asleep at the wheel,
[00:51:24] if you will, you'd look at that clap and just be like, oh, Nancy Pelosi is just like co-signing
[00:51:29] Donald Trump. But like, if you look closer and you do the work that so many of our feminist
[00:51:34] sisters have done, you see almost immediately that her clapping is actually disruptive.
[00:51:40] And she's clapping back. She's clapping back at Donald Trump.
[00:51:45] Wow. Yeah. Yeah. She is so married. I mean clapping first, I think is violence. That's why I always
[00:51:51] snap. Right. But clap, right. Yeah. I mean, I was okay. It was a little ableist that she did anything
[00:51:57] that makes a sound. I prefer when people just wave their hands. Then I preferred the snapping
[00:52:03] and then the clapping. But within the very like confines of the auto-audio normative
[00:52:12] structure in which we find ourselves, she's not going to reinvent the wheel. So I just thought
[00:52:17] the clap back was like, she, when she, you know, similarly, every time you clap that way at Trump,
[00:52:23] a, an undocumented woman is freed. That's right. And child is freed from a cage.
[00:52:31] And the same thing happened when Nancy Pelosi, when she ripped up the speech. Yes. And then also,
[00:52:38] just when she wore that wool coat and sunglasses. Yes. Yeah. That was, you know, it's that it's,
[00:52:44] that's true. It's MLK is that I have a dream speech. It's MLK is, it is. I have a dream speech.
[00:52:50] I have, it's like, I have a dream coat. Yeah. I have a dream sunglasses. I have a dream pair of
[00:52:55] sunglasses. I totally agree. And I was, I almost feel like it's almost like Malcolm. Well, yeah,
[00:53:01] but you're right. And then the ripping of the speech is like Malcolm X level.
[00:53:07] Anti-racist discourse, like almost, um, send, Kendi, even Kendi. Yeah.
[00:53:14] Or like my personal favorite, Robin Zanz. Robin DeAngelo.
[00:53:16] Yeah. I mean, she is, she and Robin D, I mean, I don't want, I hope you, I'm glad you said that.
[00:53:23] I didn't want to make the kind of white woman. To send her white woman. Yeah.
[00:53:26] Well, no, that's kind of inevitable when we're talking about our slay queens. It just happens
[00:53:31] to be, you know, Nancy and Hillary, but, um, I didn't want to go to the, like, Italian, all
[00:53:36] Italians are the same. So I'm, I want to thank you for stepping in there and, and mentioning
[00:53:42] DeAngelo, not the singer. All right. Well, can we, um, can we honor this anniversary now?
[00:53:48] Yeah. Sorry. I'm really sorry. Yeah. Uh, it's just like, I don't know, like, I just feel like it's
[00:53:55] been three years and two months since comedy was recognized. In basically.
[00:54:01] Oh, I thought it. I thought it was like stopped. Well, it's interesting.
[00:54:06] It's different people. Yeah. Like have different, you know, that's the power of, right?
[00:54:10] No, it's like she invented a new form of standup comedy. She's played an old
[00:54:18] farm and gave birth to another one. And she did. And you know how she did it?
[00:54:28] Wrote a full hour of material and then removed all of the jokes.
[00:54:35] Wow. And that is revolutionary. I mean, to me, like centering jokes in comedy, you know,
[00:54:45] phallic a little bit. It's very phallic. Um, it's, um, it's able to, like,
[00:54:51] literally, yeah, Italians who are not funny, you know, right? Yeah. Right. Yeah. Right.
[00:54:55] Who loud. I mean, cause right Italians, right. You shouldn't have to be funny to get staged on.
[00:55:00] Right. You can just be loud. No, you wish Hannah Gatsby were here right now. Like,
[00:55:05] I, yeah, I just would you give her like an honorary bowl of spaghetti and I would
[00:55:11] elect Hannah Gatsby, the president of the United States and Italy. Yes.
[00:55:17] The United, I would elect Hannah Gatsby, the president of the United States of Italy.
[00:55:22] And a little, when you could, I mean, look, I think like start, think global at local.
[00:55:26] I mean, I think we could definitely get like a street named after her in little Italy.
[00:55:30] No, Nancy Pelosi slash Hannah Gatsby 2024. Yeah. That was like very, like, that was so
[00:55:38] female of me. Um, no, that's not the right. That was so problematic of me. You know,
[00:55:44] how like Pantene, like, like despite its capitalist nature as a hair shampoo company,
[00:55:49] like they really did cause us, they like paused and causes to notice the propensity of women to
[00:55:56] apologize. And right there, what I was doing was I was like, I was being the accommodating self
[00:56:03] of facing not, I was not standing. I was not claiming my time. Yeah, reclaiming my time.
[00:56:10] I wasn't claiming my space on stolen land. That's probably why. So shout out to myself for not doing
[00:56:16] that part. But I, I needed to reclaim something because I needed to demand that she be the president
[00:56:23] of the United States of Italy. And what I did there is I just, I went straight to the compromise,
[00:56:28] which is like, so how many women do that? I mean, actually, Nancy, Hannah, Kamala, three-way ticket
[00:56:37] to have to like nerve, like what, what would like a non problematic heaven, non re appropriate
[00:56:44] Nirvana Bay, like three tickets to paradise. That's also like, but it's just like, I want to
[00:56:51] live in a world where like Hannah, Nancy, Kamala, or president, like just think about it, like
[00:56:59] Kamala comes, she arrests all the men. Okay, which is like amazing for then for Nancy Pelosi,
[00:57:07] claps back. Wait, I just want, okay. Yeah. And then we all sit down and digest the greatest
[00:57:12] comedy of all time. That's right. Yeah. But Julia, I heard you like, I heard you're like,
[00:57:17] you were trying to speak up and you were like sandwiched between two louder ethnic women.
[00:57:22] So what were you going to say that Kamala was going to arrest the men for? You know, for
[00:57:30] carrying less than one ounce of marijuana on their person. I thought you were going to say for
[00:57:37] like not taking their kids to school, which is something else that we should really son salute,
[00:57:42] literally son, son and daughter salute Kamala for because her truancy, you know, while while
[00:57:49] some people think that it's problematic to arrest people for not bringing their kid to school one
[00:57:54] day and it's criminalizing poverty, that is something that I think it's easy to say when you're a
[00:58:00] straight white man, and it's a lot harder to see when you're not. Yeah, which is why there are no
[00:58:06] progressive women of color in the world. Yeah, this is wrong. Yeah, there are none. And I really
[00:58:13] do think that people who, you know, accuse Kamala of perpetuating the standard of criminalizing
[00:58:21] poverty need to check their privilege. Yeah, totally. Because they're actually, yeah,
[00:58:28] the biggest criminals. Well, I'm sorry. No, no, no, no, I, I see the floor to you. I just wish
[00:58:34] to yield your time here. I'll reclaim your time. Thank you. Yeah, I wish I'll reclaim your time
[00:58:39] to say I wish I'm actually, I'm I yield my time to Hannah Gatsby and Kimberly Crenshaw and neither
[00:58:45] of whom is here, but yet they're both here. Yeah. On stolen line. Hello. Oh my god.
[00:58:52] Are you there God? Are you there God? It's me Kate and Kate. God, I heard my name. Oh my gosh.
[00:59:00] Were you talking about how I revolutionized stand up comedy? We were we were saying that. That is
[00:59:06] so amazing. Thank you so much for everything that you did to end sexism by having a Netflix special.
[00:59:13] Oh, thank you. You know, you don't need jokes in a special. That's what everyone thinks, but you don't.
[00:59:21] Yeah, you just need to talk about pick up so and then go. Oh, wow. I mean, it's just like,
[00:59:29] you know, I normally I would say that it is violence to mention the name of either of those men,
[00:59:35] especially without a trigger warning, but like I just, you know, I mean, from you queen anything.
[00:59:41] Anything. Yeah, from you queen. Is it is the term queen to gendered? I think I apologize.
[00:59:46] It is a little gendered for my taste, but.
[00:59:50] Queen. That's queen and king. That's better. Yeah.
[00:59:54] Yeah. I mean, I just want to thank you. I can't see you, but from your voice, I think I want to
[00:59:59] thank you for like introducing American audiences to crocodiles. I think that's really important.
[01:00:09] Hannah, okay. So if we elected you the president, what would you what would be like your first
[01:00:14] stuff that you did? Okay. Well, first of all, self-deprecating humor would be completely illegal because
[01:00:24] I love making speech illegal. That's like my favorite thing.
[01:00:28] It's self-deprecation. It's just self-humiliation.
[01:00:34] And it's actually quite violent. But the thing is that a lot of people don't,
[01:00:40] don't see it like that. And that in and of itself is a privilege.
[01:00:48] Wow. I never really thought about. I'm going to put the privilege of laughing at something.
[01:00:54] Wow. I'm going to never do that again. I just want to push back on that a little bit on two
[01:00:58] counts. One is that as an Ashkenazic woman, Ashkenazis are statistically the most self-deprecating.
[01:01:05] So you're just going to want to maybe like examine that a little bit and unpack that.
[01:01:09] Also, I think that's kink shaming because the suggestion is that violence is never
[01:01:18] basically it's a ratio of Jews and BDSM participants. It's a ratio of BDSM culture
[01:01:24] and or Jewish culture, Ashkenazic, not Mizrahi. And of course, I shouldn't say those things like
[01:01:30] they're mutually exclusive because there's a rich BDSM Ashkenazic culture. So it is basically,
[01:01:35] I just want to invite you to interrogate whether you agree with me that it's problematic on those
[01:01:41] two counts. And as a Jewish woman, I can't speak for BDSM, but I can say I'm ambivalent BDS.
[01:01:52] Okay. Well, that's another issue. I just want to unpack there. I just want to remind you that I
[01:02:00] may I'm a lesbian woman from Tasmania. And that basically makes me a white Aboriginal.
[01:02:10] So I would invite you to check your own privilege. But I will, of course, internalize everything
[01:02:23] that you just said. Thank you. I really appreciate that. That is so beautiful,
[01:02:27] Hannah. You just really like have showed me like a whole new way of like opening
[01:02:33] to my own growth and like leveling up, you know, like I just, I wish that like you could be the
[01:02:40] president and then I could also get therapy from you. Not to ask you for free emotional labor.
[01:02:46] Oh, yeah, that's really I'm glad you tracked yourself on that K because I was about to intervene
[01:02:50] and disrupt that. Yeah. I feel like you're saying you're opening up your own growth. I feel like
[01:02:54] I'm growing to my own openings. Yeah, I might, you know, I've been spending this whole summer
[01:03:00] centering my openings. Yeah. Yeah. I've been opening my center. Yeah. My chakra. Yeah. It's
[01:03:07] interesting how that works out. Yeah. Well, ladies, this conversation feels a bit phallic
[01:03:14] in nature. So I'm going to, I'm going to skid at all. Okay. But Hannah, all right. So let me push
[01:03:22] back on this by, you know, calling us push back after she said it was phallic. That's let me,
[01:03:27] I don't want to penetrate that too deep. Oh, sorry. Well, I just feel like, but you know,
[01:03:32] words are just fine. I'm buying the, you know, the phallic language is not welcome in this
[01:03:40] feminist space. Aren't we potentially being turfy? Hannah, have you thought about that?
[01:03:46] You know, right. I, I haven't. And it's really something that I need some perspective on.
[01:03:56] And I guess we'll have to go read some, some theory, some, not the, you know,
[01:04:06] social is kind, but the good kind. Massage. So I do have a question for you, you know,
[01:04:13] given the subject matter of this podcast and your outstanding advocacy for, you know,
[01:04:19] the LGBT community for literally every single member of it, like we're, where do you fall on
[01:04:27] having a same sex relationship with your father? Can you know, how can we support and celebrate
[01:04:35] being, you know, as some might more colloquial say colloquially say being gay with your dad?
[01:04:40] Oh, okay. Being gay with your dad is something that I've never given much thought to. And that's
[01:04:48] really my own. Yeah. That's my privilege. I want to acknowledge that. But I think ultimately,
[01:05:00] we just have to support each other. That's really all I'm going to say about that.
[01:05:14] Wow. That's really beautiful. I feel like you didn't. Thank you. That. Yeah. Thank you.
[01:05:19] I was like, it was just really moved by that. Yeah. That's how I
[01:05:24] and I've really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really
[01:05:30] appreciate it. I love watching, you know, I'm crying at the same time. I mean, it's like, if you're not
[01:05:32] crying, you're not paying attention. That's right. I