Cum Town | Premium | 12/12/2021
[00:00:00] Hey once again, Adam is late to the oh baby
[00:00:04] He's like my fucking dick and bone and he's managed to do it for the fifth time. I I'm on to I am too late
[00:00:13] Haven't been late to a single one. Well, you're the only one who knows how to work the board
[00:00:17] Yeah, we don't know how to turn the pocket. You know how to doing the thing that
[00:00:21] That you know, you do to your mom or you're like, I don't know how to use a laundry machine
[00:00:25] No, dude. I really don't know how to use the board believe me
[00:00:28] I would love to come in here and do a solo hour podcast. Yeah, you would love that
[00:00:32] It would be funny because of how much it would piss people off a little bit of a bill bird
[00:00:36] If I get if one of the podcast was me solo bill bird about Jill Burr. That's good. Yeah, I got my fucking cock cut off
[00:00:43] I'm my fucking dick off. I you did it now. I'm a I'm a gold-digging hole now fucking convinced me
[00:00:53] Said fuck it. I'll join I'll go ahead fucking I'm trans now
[00:00:57] How long am I gonna hold on to my dick?
[00:01:04] And so what I'm supposed to not be fucking angry anymore old you read pussy honestly
[00:01:08] I would have been a girl years ago, but I thought they weren't allowed to be angry
[00:01:15] Let me in the bathroom not have to piss my dick shot
[00:01:25] Jill I have a question. Yeah, I didn't really think about it. I'm trying to I'm trying to dial the voice in
[00:01:32] Do the does the carpet match the drapes?
[00:01:35] Well Jill's bald. Yeah, Jill. What did you do with your hair? You know wig? Yeah, are you red? Are you redheaded?
[00:01:41] Yeah pussy hair pussy hair is definitely red. Yeah, but just a word crotch. There's the wig
[00:01:49] She's got to get a wig does the wig wig match if you go on this if you're boy
[00:01:55] But if you were bald and you go on girl drugs. Yeah, help your hair grow. No, no you end up looking like a guess who character
[00:02:06] Guess the yeah wigs women get to use wigs in general which is on it's a double standard. Yeah
[00:02:14] Ariana Grande is always wearing we're famous
[00:02:16] It's funny that white men have just gone bald for years and then they get angry and shoot up at school
[00:02:20] Where is black men black women go bald and they're just like now I got the most hair. Yep, exactly
[00:02:25] I'm about to steal. I'm about to fucking steal from black women. That's a time-honored tradition
[00:02:30] That's a thing about us black women make the world takes just like fucking
[00:02:35] Trent Trenton. I would love to see the Trenton of the people
[00:02:40] I would love to see stop was just really long fingernails just slapping his yeah, dude
[00:02:45] I'm gonna get the Oreo weave you see no weave like the what is it?
[00:02:49] It's like an Atlanta. There's like a competition in Atlanta
[00:02:52] And they have awesome hair dudes. Yeah, yeah, I'm gonna get hair like Babs dude
[00:02:57] Who's that? Babs the movie with Hallie Berry. You know their hair. I don't remember that no
[00:03:04] But I've seen a to great movie. It's a great movie too. Yeah anyway, yeah
[00:03:10] Right now. I'm growing out the bald pony and after that. I think I'm gonna go short
[00:03:15] Kind of Tony soprano. Yeah, we're on the sides. Let it be bald up top and after that is the wig era
[00:03:21] Oh, and we still have time we still have plenty of this years. We're talking. Yeah, but it's scripted
[00:03:26] I don't think you're gonna get any more bald than you are now. I will everyone gets bolder when they get older do they?
[00:03:35] Max's theory about male celebrities you said this a million times
[00:03:39] I'm saying as if it's interest you think they all wear like you know what Max told me is that well because he was a
[00:03:45] Male celebrities are bald. I mean he doesn't listen anymore. You can say well. Yeah, we wears a two-way the rug. Yeah
[00:03:54] Yeah, I think if you're very interesting to wear it sometimes and not you know, yeah be great
[00:04:00] It's like driving a convertible high. Yeah, I was I dislike
[00:04:08] I wonder what that could be I think it's oh to catch everyone up
[00:04:13] We were really missing the cabin so we decided to drove back to drive back up
[00:04:17] And we're gonna be spending the Christmas season up here. Christian listen who knows maybe January. Yeah
[00:04:23] At least the gym maybe some of the January bonus episodes
[00:04:26] And maybe you know what maybe black history month. Yeah, that would be if we should take black history month off
[00:04:41] W. E. B. Did really why yeah his childhood home. Yeah, I don't know the past last past the last time
[00:04:48] Yeah, we're by some you have fosha to you a fosha and covered bridges. They love covered bridges
[00:04:54] I think that's a great combination of stuff to fear out. Well, it's weird to have you a fosha because you can't see it over the
[00:04:59] For the cover bridge because it's covered. Yeah, that's how you know that the covered bridges that do they have like
[00:05:05] Aerial sheriffs to check to see if you're getting sucked off. Yeah
[00:05:09] Covered bridge. I want to be walked out into those woods and executed. Yeah, dude
[00:05:14] Why not like Miller's crossing like Miller's crossing. I was thinking more at dawn
[00:05:18] Yeah, I kind of some kind of like military tribunal thing. Yeah, what did you do wrong?
[00:05:27] When I tortured and yeah, you always forget about the you always forget about the my friends in the bush. Yeah, I
[00:05:34] Make sense. They always forgetting about the Geneva Convention
[00:05:38] Did you need a connect invention? That sounds like a hot bitch. Yeah, it's where we go get a fucking sexy girl named Geneva
[00:05:44] That's a sucker dude. Yeah, why don't you Geneva's and you just show up? They all suck your cock
[00:05:48] They're all named Geneva. They're all named Geneva. They're like they're like sick European girls. You know, yeah
[00:05:55] You gotta get a new wire Adam should I switch it right now? There's one right behind you
[00:06:04] Do what a better wire. Yeah, there's one right there. Oh, yeah, you know why that's like that
[00:06:09] What it's my fault. Yeah, you know, you get smooches you broke it
[00:06:14] I you do hold the water the my do your bend that you bend it you literally my head. Well, see that I'm plugging plug it back in
[00:06:25] There we go perfect perfect Wow that fixed it completely what do we know? It's not cracking anymore
[00:06:37] There he is. Yeah, we'll switch it on the next episode
[00:06:40] So guys on Wednesday before this up Adams Mike was gonna be worth good. Yeah, I
[00:06:47] Love that we continue to do them out of order
[00:06:50] I'm gonna drive the show into the ground. It's gonna continue to lose money
[00:06:53] And then we're gonna have to sell Adam's mic to keep the show going. Oh, yeah
[00:06:56] We're gonna have to start selling come-town experiences. Yeah, like come to come to fucking
[00:07:00] Yeah, here's the cabin. I'm gonna have to start turning tricks for for you guys. You're gonna have to yeah
[00:07:05] We're gonna have to start watching basketball with people. Yeah, we're gonna have to start watching Little Man
[00:07:09] It's like come do cocaine with us. Yeah face time us wall
[00:07:20] It's wild cuz you know Howard Stern makes a hundred million hundred like sixty million dollars a year to do a show
[00:07:26] It's like why would you why would you not retire? I don't understand dude if I had one million dollars
[00:07:33] I would never work again. I won't move to Baltimore. That would be the end work
[00:07:36] Yeah, and I would just have a good time
[00:07:38] I think five would have to be the number for me. Yeah, I mean whatever
[00:07:40] I guess that do the math but that's five will give you enough that you can you know, you're you know
[00:07:47] Any day money in case anything happens. Yeah, if I could just get a house
[00:07:52] That's the truth, but if I get if I could if I could pay a house off cash if I get a little place in the story, man
[00:07:59] I'm good to go and that could probably probably close to that. I'm close
[00:08:02] But I mean I could buy an apartment, but it's like I want a house dude. Yeah, I've talked about it
[00:08:06] I want my driveway. I want to be a fucking immigrant that peers. Well, here's what we do
[00:08:11] Yeah, we're gonna I guess I shouldn't say this on the premium because then the people who listen to premium will hear it, but
[00:08:17] Yeah, just whisper. Yeah, just say it quite what we'll do is I'll
[00:08:25] Increase the the membership fee on patreon from five dollars to
[00:08:29] It's about 50,000 down. Yeah, like 11 to 99 on the 31st. Yeah, we'll collect I
[00:08:37] Can't do the math in my hand, but what a nice amount nice amount money
[00:08:40] Yeah, and it'll be too late for all we'll take the money out before they can reverse the bank
[00:08:45] It will be a Mexico will be a ghost by then. Yeah, we'll ball buy houses in Astoria. Yeah, good luck finding us in Queens
[00:08:51] Yeah, impossible. Good luck finding a guy that looks like me picking me out of a Queens haste at yeah, and me and flushing
[00:08:57] China now you check we know you'll be fluent when I get the eyelids you'll have the surgery
[00:09:02] You have the reverse Korean surgery. Yeah, how they all trying to try to look like pop. See that's the thing if they can do that
[00:09:07] Mm-hmm. Why can't you do the opposite? Yeah, it's a good point and there's way more than us. Mm-hmm. So we're the minority. Yes, sir
[00:09:15] Right. Yes, sir ski. They are we're being oppressed
[00:09:19] Yeah, and I'm about to buy at about the can't think cold I'm about to press my dick into the mouth of a k-pop
[00:09:27] Starlit the n-word and wordy report the n-wordy report. Mm-hmm. That's good Tom Cruise
[00:09:34] It's those those twins and they have a little ping pong ball and it says the n-word. Yeah, he has to stop people from saying it in the future
[00:09:40] Yes to arrest them before they say it just Nick over and over again. Yeah, he keeps popping over. I swear I wasn't gonna say
[00:09:52] Premeditated a guy's coming home. You don't see these very much anymore
[00:09:57] He finds his wife having sex with a black gentleman
[00:10:01] But or Nick just at the at the board. Yeah, the mic it is hand
[00:10:16] The n-word police coming to get me you have to get your eyes taken out and wordity report
[00:10:21] I never finished that movie. I'm so good. What happens is Tom Cruise is the bad guy or something? No Tom Cruise is the hero of the
[00:10:29] Yeah, I thought that was a twist. He's a pre-caught
[00:10:31] Some was kidnapped in years before pre-crime the twist is what's the name Chris plumber is the bad guy. Yeah
[00:10:38] Wow spoiler for the Chris plumber. I thought it was maximum. Oh, it's the same guy in my mind
[00:10:43] Even though one's not American. It's funny cuz that is such a good movie
[00:10:47] That also has like just a glaring like it's did that whole like
[00:10:55] Like that's like the fucking turn and he's like I never said she drowned it. Oh damn
[00:11:03] It's like Scooby-doo play from the 20s with literally yeah, but the rest of the movie's great
[00:11:09] Yeah, that's like the mast avenger does it again
[00:11:12] Yeah, just in terms of him John like getting someone on a note on like a wire in terms of just the the art and the
[00:11:19] Futurism to the thing it's still like it feels very current. It's a 20 year old movie
[00:11:25] Yeah, and it's weird because it's like it's not like that movie is like you know
[00:11:29] You watch Blade Runner and it still feels contemporary because everything like the stuff now like all that cyberpunk bullshit
[00:11:36] All this is copying Blade right right right. Yeah, I mean it's my advertising right blade runner
[00:11:43] Like the hologram ads. Yeah, yeah, but every but I know you said ads already existed
[00:11:48] I mean, but you know well all my only point is this minority report like still looks good
[00:11:51] It still looks like you know if you wanted to make a new thing about the future
[00:11:55] If you want to make a movie about the future right none of this like I mean you look at like time cop
[00:11:58] And it's like 1994 and he's driving like a shoe box. Yeah, yeah, and he's got a mullet again
[00:12:03] That's the best part about time cop. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
[00:12:05] They're like yeah mullets are out in 1990 before years from now. That shit's coming back. Yeah, yeah, yeah
[00:12:10] Well, they would be right about 2020 or 2022. What is it? Mullet's never really came back. I guess maybe it's just not the way
[00:12:17] It's not you know like fucking like you don't have like a uncle Jesse on TV
[00:12:21] I don't know man go to fucking North Carolina bait high school baseball or Bushwick
[00:12:26] But that's fucking ironic. That's not like, you know, yeah, but always starts that way if Ryan C. Cress at a mullet in good morning
[00:12:33] I see I see what you're saying. I'm Ryan C. Cress. I'm a mullet
[00:12:43] Anyway, it's nice nice to be back in the cabin have a little
[00:12:50] Deluxe bacon breakfast sandwich. Yeah, how are the sandwiches boys? They're good. I didn't really make a sandwich
[00:12:56] I kind of just 18 ingredients separate respect. Wow, what's that shit called the constructed? Yeah, it is
[00:13:04] Both a post-modern saying I had a lot of bacon
[00:13:06] Uh-huh. I let my hair down on cabin week bacon egg and cheese
[00:13:14] Yeah, now I'm feeling good. I'm feeling I got that coffee
[00:13:18] Coffee plus the sluggishness of bacon. Yeah, I don't like that feeling dude
[00:13:22] I love having to persevere through either weed or horrible food with a stimulant
[00:13:28] That's funny that it's weird because like I just feel disgusted like I'm having a good time
[00:13:32] But I feel disguised as we get here. I feel disgust of course because I know it's coming
[00:13:35] Yeah, only time I felt good so far as my hidden that ice cold shower this first
[00:13:41] Get out you just fucking you feel you look like a victim. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. No, I look I love trudging through the slog
[00:13:47] I feel like a soldier. Yeah, I do fighting against my I do but I need it on the outside
[00:13:51] Right on the inside. I can't no, it's I love it the internal struggle. Yeah, I love the strife. Mm-hmm
[00:13:58] Although I'm do we have kind of a yin yang sort of I think we do yeah
[00:14:01] I think we do and Adam. This is the most you've eaten probably and it's kind of that is sort of how the universe works
[00:14:07] Do I'm sort of like a black hole and you're like like the big bang?
[00:14:14] With this bug is in perfect balance. Yeah, I put out as much
[00:14:19] Energy as you like to fucking suck off. Yeah, right?
[00:14:22] I'm like a big hard energy cock and you're a big gay guy who sucks the cock. No, I'm a black hole
[00:14:27] I think I think you're an in a nigga your ass your a black what I was generous to you saying that you're a super
[00:14:34] No, I think you and you were correct and Adam. No, you know what you are is your gas job
[00:14:39] You're a big big fan of big energy fucking smell you're sucking it
[00:14:43] You're you're a black black hole being hard because just a big fat fucking ball of gas
[00:14:48] There's no day you're gay and penetrating worry gay guy storms going on the bar sucking me off the well
[00:14:57] I have I'm a giant energy cock piece of shit
[00:15:00] Big gay black hole and you're saying a mouth safe like a mouth of a little pencil thin mustache and you're sucking I'm Darth Vader
[00:15:13] You're fucking job of the hunt yeah, and Adam there's some fucking
[00:15:20] To make his way into Star War water he's water and he's he's sitting there
[00:15:24] He's sitting there fucking trying to calculate whose side he should take now you're blaming me for this fight that you got in
[00:15:31] In a matter of 30 seconds. It seems like you guys were getting great. Well, that's the thing about the universe for a second
[00:15:36] It's in bounds and then explosion. I'm sorry for calling you a
[00:15:40] Stop wrote it on a piece of paper and trick you saying and he no I think you know I have to read everything that's in front
[00:15:46] I don't know. I haven't I don't really listen to come down, but that might be the first time you've ever
[00:15:50] No, I'm sorry for calling you a oh, I thought just saying I think this is something
[00:16:04] You're outside the hall of gosh, you're like I'm doing a remembrance. Yeah
[00:16:07] I was going for everyone. I'm saying it's gonna take so long before anti-Semitism is allowed to just be funny again the way
[00:16:15] Anti-Italianism is fun. No, yeah, well, it's gonna take until Jews stop, you know having control
[00:16:22] No, it's it's there's got to be like zero
[00:16:26] credibility to the statements that anti-Semitism in America is a problem right because the second you get
[00:16:31] Not in our lifetime. We're done. Yeah for the rest of our lives now
[00:16:34] There was that guy that shot up that synagogue in Pittsburgh. That's yeah, that's what I'm saying. Yeah
[00:16:39] That's what I'm saying in our lifetime. We're fucked. Yeah, I know it'll never be good that guy really ruined the part
[00:16:45] ruined a great thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, cuz it's like and that almost happened with Italians with 9-11
[00:16:50] Which if you did the numbers that probably belongs to them because of the firefighters
[00:16:55] Yeah, the amount of people in there that are like yeah, Michael vagina. I'm a fucking the count manager
[00:17:03] You think sure yeah, you probably a lot of yeah, yeah, all the first
[00:17:06] You know what it's probably one of those like it's the amount of Italians and lack of Jews
[00:17:09] Yeah, well because why because the tech got a
[00:17:12] Called out that they got a low is a fact a fact. Yeah, it's less tricky. It's a lesson one. Yeah, 2001. Yeah
[00:17:20] 2001 and we had we had that's why I had a red razor during 9-11
[00:17:24] Oh, you heard the AIDS razor. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, I was pumped. I had a Motorola star tack. I think I had a
[00:17:31] I had a no Kia with snake on it. You had the brick had the brick. That's a classic
[00:17:36] That was my high school phone. I had a hand me down star tack that I held on to until like
[00:17:42] 2009 yeah, I had I didn't have a smartphone late
[00:17:46] You're the only person that had one later than me that I knew but I had leg of I had I loved the fucking
[00:17:55] So you're fucking I always wanted to go I tried to go back, but it's hard to find them. I'm gonna go Luddite at some point
[00:18:04] Even when I come back to this not this cabin, but this area by a house. Yeah live up here. I would love to just live up here
[00:18:11] You have to you have to open some kind of gay shop and then people in the town have to know you
[00:18:15] Yeah, problem. Yeah, yeah me and my husband are gonna open a turquoise jewelry store. Mm-hmm
[00:18:21] That'd be awesome, but we're gonna move to like New Mexico what I want is just a haunted place
[00:18:26] You know just wearing like colonial clothes and just fucking like being a window when somebody drives past a house
[00:18:31] Oh to be the town and then they stop and then drive back. I'm gone. Right. That's awesome. Yeah, you're like maybe we can buy this place
[00:19:06] Of course they are very superstitious Latin people believe in ghosts not the way Latin people do
[00:19:13] But they Greek people do a lot of like they're very superstitious thought up like the sign of the cross
[00:19:18] There isn't that much ghost stuff in the culture though. That's a great question. Yeah
[00:19:23] And they believe they're scared of the occult
[00:19:27] Okay, like old people that's like ghosts adjacent like when the day remember that song dance with the devil
[00:19:34] And dance with the dough. Do you remember that song? Yeah, it was swept Europe when we were
[00:19:39] That was a big that was a big Euro just fine. This one actually
[00:19:43] That the Greek church came out against it. They said it was good
[00:19:48] They said they said it was spreading Satanism. Yeah, that's that's weird that there was like this like I guess
[00:19:54] It's like the Mortal Kombat song when it was like that was like something that European people would dance to yeah
[00:20:11] I would love to get raw dog don't leak a nose to this I
[00:21:11] Dig 5, feel the fire. Dig 6, pick up your weapons and fight.
[00:21:52] This is the first time I've ever seen a game.
[00:22:10] So the bishop and shit, the archbishop was like, you can't play this.
[00:22:17] What the fuck is that? I've never heard that in my life.
[00:22:22] This fucking tore the club up in Greece in 2000.
[00:22:32] When I was like a fat 12 year old, I was just like,
[00:22:42] As I was saying, from the little steelings,
[00:22:47] you have to get a shitty Turkey sandwich instead of
[00:22:55] How dare they charge $9 and think that you're going to use a self checkout.
[00:23:01] Dude, I bought 15 dollars for a muscle milk.
[00:23:10] From basically every airport I go to I love magnets now cuz my aunt my fat little aunt in Greece loves magnets
[00:23:17] My different places of different places in America. She'll never go. She's scared of the plane
[00:23:21] She's afraid of planes. They come to America. All she needs is the man. She's fucking little neurotic
[00:23:28] Bitch she's fucking no, she's cool. She's like my girl. She's out to her. Is she fagging? No, she's straight
[00:23:34] She's straight. I think she might have only ever fucked my fat uncle, which is a shame. That's beautiful. Yeah
[00:23:41] They both they're a nice couple dude. They just got fattish shit together
[00:23:45] She was cuter than him, but he wasn't that ugly as a little guy, but now he's a fucking train wreck
[00:23:50] And they both got fat. It's only fair if both of them get disgusted. They both got this
[00:23:56] Yeah, yeah, although she looks like a chubby little older lady. She's still cute
[00:24:01] But he's like just stuff and he's like he's got like a weird upturned piggy nose
[00:24:05] He's fat as shit, but he knows all the best restaurants in Greece in fact
[00:24:09] August when we go deal when we record where to show it the word for from September October November in August
[00:24:18] If I lived like that if I was just some little pig man in a fishing village with an arranged marriage
[00:24:24] Well, he's in Athens and he chose his wife, but yeah, okay. Yeah, I guess I was listening. Yeah
[00:24:31] Does somebody like that they're like man fucking likes gay. No, he loves his life
[00:24:35] Yeah, well he his life sucks dick now because of austerity that fucking bitch Angela Merkel took my man's yeah
[00:24:41] My man's pension. I swear to God if I ever see he's got he gets 40% of his pen
[00:24:45] They really fucked Greece man seriously. Yeah, he gets 40% of his pension. They used to have an awesome life
[00:24:50] He worked hardest shit. Yeah embezzling at the Greek Bank National Bank for years
[00:24:55] And he they used to they used to have a great life. They would go to like cuz Europe
[00:24:59] It's like every fucking cool cities like an hour flight away. Yeah, they would go to Monaco
[00:25:03] He would go see Champions League match. We're big old and be our cost family
[00:25:07] Mm-hmm him and his boys would just go fucking go to like the away games
[00:25:10] It's just like then just like yeah, the way section the away section is like that's a hard dick move on a champion
[00:25:16] Yeah, some of those guys are in intense. Yeah
[00:25:19] And now they fucking just sit at home complaining about how fucked they are and they are fucked
[00:25:26] Yeah, Greece is really the year is a year is one euro
[00:25:31] That's true, but yeah shots out to them. They know the best fucking restaurants no matter where we go. That's sick
[00:25:37] Yeah, it's nice having fat ass family. That's one time my aunt my uncle was being like particular
[00:25:42] He was like, you know, I had to go I had to go like run an errand. I had to go get euros out or some shit
[00:25:47] Mm-hmm right to change money and he was like, oh, I know a place. He was like, you know what?
[00:25:51] I can take you be ready at 10 a.m. And I'm like, I want to fuck away a cup of gas 10 a.m
[00:25:57] I'll just like oversleep and don't forget about it. Yeah, this cocksucker knocks on my fucking door at 9 30
[00:26:02] Yeah, we go there. It's 20 minutes like so far away from where we live
[00:26:06] Yeah, he drives me there and it's like in the middle of the downtown. I'm like, why the fuck are we doing this and then a surprise birthday party?
[00:26:13] No, we go there and there's like a place with a souvlaki that has a specific tomato sauce that he likes
[00:26:22] He was like four for breads 10 a.m. Yeah, he's just having force of like that
[00:26:28] It was pretty soon. He's like and I only had I only had two and he was like he's like, oh, what are you a fucking faggot?
[00:26:33] I'm like gonna eat two fucking souvlaki. I fucking 10 a.m. Mm-hmm
[00:26:38] But shots at the fact that he meets me to my guy with diabetes and uncle and just drag people around
[00:26:44] Yeah, he loves doing gay shit. Although I am an uncle and I don't I don't have any pretend you you've spent
[00:26:50] Half as much time with my nieces. I have
[00:26:54] Really you've met her only twice I think about that. Yeah, that picture of you that your
[00:26:59] Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. You're like, I don't know. Oh, yeah, I was there too. Yeah, I was there too
[00:27:06] Yeah, but I got a cold. I don't wanna you're like
[00:27:13] I didn't want to get the baby. She's like just take a picture Nick. Yeah, yeah
[00:27:17] Dude, I can't wait to be an uncle. I hope my brother my brother's getting married soon
[00:27:21] I hope he I don't think he's gonna have kids fast cuz they're yeah young
[00:27:24] Yeah, I saw that kid again and she was like crying cuz
[00:27:27] I had a beard and I guess babies don't like yeah
[00:27:30] I don't like it when you look like a kind of a goat a monster. Yeah, babies get scared bit beards for sure good
[00:27:43] Yeah, dude, I can't wait to be a fucking yeah can't wait to take my 11 year old nephew to a whore house. Yep. Yep
[00:27:51] I did tell you that my cousin tried to do that with my little brother. Yeah, my cousin Lael tried to sneak my brother out
[00:27:58] And he was like that comment. He was like we're gonna go get put a guy
[00:28:01] We're gonna go fuck horse and George like looked up to this kid so much. She was like, uh-huh, okay
[00:28:11] And I saw him George's face was like what he was so scared of getting pussy. He's like a little kid
[00:28:17] No, neither was just like and then one time they went they went to like a
[00:28:21] Soccer game he was gonna take I think my brother to a soccer game
[00:28:24] And he was just like he was like all right. We'll meet back at the house
[00:28:28] And my brother was like dude. I don't want to be they got separated
[00:28:31] They're like he just just like meet me at the train station when we back at the house, but I was like
[00:28:35] I don't fuck I'm an Athens. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing
[00:28:37] He just took a taxi home. No, neither didn't get him till 7 a.m. The next day
[00:28:41] He just got drunk his fucking kept getting lost in his own city. He fucking rules, dude. That's awesome
[00:28:47] He fucking rocks. He's dry. He's just you want to talk about drunk driving
[00:28:50] My man my man is fucking blacked out fucking driving a stick around the streets of Athens
[00:28:59] I'm like dude. Why do we go here? He was like he drove we went out drinking. I was like all right
[00:29:03] We'll get a drink and just go home after that. Mm-hmm. He's man just fucking stayed out till 4
[00:29:10] He rules you love it show with this guy and he's literally gonna do the podcast
[00:29:17] Take over you can barely speak English. You'll be awesome. Yeah, I'm barely spoken English. You can forget
[00:29:23] I would love to dude. We just hit your head in a specific place. Yeah, I might get a lobotomy at some point
[00:29:30] You'd be free dude. I probably will that's you know, I'm gonna have part of my brain cut out. Yeah
[00:29:35] Yeah, I got this new thing now that just like shocks you anytime you have a negative thought really in plant. Yeah, holy shit
[00:29:41] It's like you're like that you're like I don't like myself and then just electress your beautiful queen
[00:29:49] Yeah, you're not fat as shit. Yes, or just get like Frankenstein a black woman's brain into my head. Okay
[00:29:56] That would be cool. Yeah, it would be cool. They could finally have the thing of Lord give me the
[00:30:01] Body of a mediocre white man or whatever. Yeah, now we'll see one of those black ladies. I mean like a oh
[00:30:06] I was thinking that more is a social good morning. Mr. Stavro, right?
[00:30:11] Right constantly positive. Yeah, I see like like a secretary whose life is objectively bad
[00:30:17] But just it's having a much better time much better time than anybody once a year you get a cinnabon
[00:30:22] Yep, and it that carries your spirit 12 12 sugars that's in your coffee every morning sweet chariot plays is the donka-chino
[00:30:49] Don't get donuts trying to do that as a commercial. Yeah
[00:30:54] We already got them with the flavor there was some there was like a awesome MLK
[00:30:58] Uh Photoshop, I think might it maybe was Florida State or something where they had like
[00:31:03] MLK put his hands up and they photoshopped it to be like a wide receiver catching a ball with the Florida State hands is awesome. I
[00:31:11] Love with I love hilarious invocations of Martin Luther King who does get enough credit for getting pussy by the way
[00:31:19] Percheting on his wife did that actually happen or the FBI made that up
[00:31:23] I think it did happen and the FBI was also a thing a ball a great man do get pussy on the you have to even Gandhi
[00:31:32] Was doing that shit well he was sleeping with little kids and being like look how good I am
[00:31:42] It'll be like me putting a couple next to my bed
[00:31:45] That's the only thing he did it with was like children in his bed
[00:31:47] It's not like there was no other like you didn't live in a world of temptation aside from that
[00:31:51] Yeah, there's not like he was living in a fucking bar with surrounded by liquor and pornography
[00:31:56] Yeah, which tells you he really wanted to fuck. Oh, yeah, and he did before he really he wanted to so badly
[00:32:04] Then we're all fighting the urge and he's like a normal man wouldn't you put him in the bed with them?
[00:32:13] He's just sitting there all night dreaming of fucking the child he's sleeping next to yeah thinking about it
[00:32:22] You know fellas guy talk we all want to fuck kids, you know just between those fellas
[00:32:28] We all what you know what you have to know your enemy right fight fire with fire
[00:32:33] Yeah, how are you gonna beat the British another pet it's funny that he's a civil right a file versus pedophile
[00:32:38] It's funny that he's a civil rights leader, but he also hated black people did he yeah, that's pretty awesome
[00:32:44] That movie's pretty good Ben Kingsley the Ben Kingsley. Yeah, I've seen that since I was a kid
[00:32:49] Yeah, it is good. He on the record said like and like he lived in I think South Africa for a while
[00:32:54] Yeah, and then you know what he thought he was white and someone called him a coolie on the train and he's like they think I'm fucking
[00:33:06] India to prove that we're better than black people cuz he thought in his mind is the Indian ass mind right
[00:33:13] This is back with when Indian people they didn't want to be black. This is when they want to be white interesting
[00:33:18] You know Gandhi would Gandhi would be sick to his stomach. Yeah to see what late night for Seth Meyers
[00:33:41] The black eyes if they're Indian guys like
[00:33:45] Hold on slick. Yeah, you think I'm a cracker. Yeah
[00:33:49] I'm Indian and then he's black eyes. I guess the same as being a fucking white guy
[00:33:53] Yeah, it's lit your family has 150 million
[00:33:56] You're all doctors and then his dad calls and he's like hello father. Yeah, I would have to make out on
[00:34:02] It's time to go back to a hitting black people. Yeah, but I don't want to I want to be cool like them
[00:34:13] Gandhi would be it would be fucking just
[00:34:17] Couldn't not would not know what to do with today's climate. Oh, yeah
[00:34:21] And more can Gandhi Gandhi would probably be on the Epstein plane if he was around today. Yeah for sure
[00:34:27] Yeah, not fucking but definitely just put me give me 19 massage. Yeah
[00:34:33] Give me our newest massage as Jesus. You would do it misogynist. You would do what Dershowitz claimed to have done
[00:34:39] Yeah, only get a massage. I kept my underwear on the entire time and I did not pay for it
[00:34:46] That is the most important aspect to remember is there was no financial transaction
[00:34:51] That's necessarily precluding the suggestion that it was prostitution
[00:34:54] I had a sensual massage from a child show me the letter of the law
[00:35:06] Frankly we're in the middle of a pandemic and I think we should focus on that everyone needs to everyone mask up everyone has to wear a mask
[00:35:15] And we're not even we're not gonna talk for a second more about what I was doing on that plane why I was there all the time
[00:35:21] Why Malcolm Gladwell Bill Clinton and Bill Gates and a bunch of other guys were also there. Let's all ignore that
[00:35:27] In fact, you could say it's almost perfectly time
[00:35:35] Supposed global pandemic that we now know
[00:35:45] And we're just gonna like like everything else in the last two years just sort of say oh well, you know
[00:35:50] I guess that's just that I guess you know, that's fine
[00:35:52] We'll just we'll pretend to be mad for a week and then the fucking pandemic
[00:35:57] Let live you got a round that's what their songs about yeah, and I it's just funded the thing
[00:36:02] But how oh look we fucked up Afghanistan
[00:36:04] Why don't we pay attention to that for a second? Oh?
[00:36:08] What's this a video of Bill Clinton's dick going into a child?
[00:36:12] Well, I guess I mean Zane Malick hit a bitch
[00:36:22] That's fucking that's wild crazy. So anyway anyways, let's just we'll go ahead and pretend that's a doctored photo James O'Keefe made it
[00:36:32] James O'Keefe has died suddenly by the way
[00:36:35] Yeah, yeah, oh what's this it's document that says the CIA was planning to assassinate Julian Assange
[00:36:43] And then use that as a precedent to kill other journalists
[00:36:47] Because they could deem them terrorists yep
[00:36:52] Well, well, that's uh, we need a booster hold on here. Let's go look at the trending topics on Twitter. Yeah, dude
[00:37:01] Let's check it out. Let's see what the opiate what thing you opiate of the masses is Avengers campus
[00:37:07] Oh, yeah, here's here's what it is. That's the fucked up part is that even they not only did they yes
[00:37:12] It is an opiate of the masses they give you all the shit, but then they took opiate's away from us. That's true
[00:37:17] That's and they made Oxycontin illegal, right?
[00:37:20] Which is the only nice thing corporations have done for a better
[00:37:25] Oxycod the Sacklers are heroes in a hundred years. Yeah, literally in a hundred years people are gonna look back and say
[00:37:31] Fucking they were martyr. They deserve it. Well, they weren't they got everything they wanted they got everything
[00:37:43] And that's the sad you only think they made a clean opiate that's fucking almost as strong as heroin
[00:37:48] Mm-hmm. You could just go get Oxycod. There's no fucking fentanyl crisis if you're just getting prescription pills, sir
[00:37:54] And now it's like ruin your life. Yeah, but if you feel feel good
[00:37:57] I'm way down CIA knew we were gonna fucking they knew the Afghanistan was up and they hated us for it
[00:38:02] Mm-hmm for taking away their poppy fields taking the other part other killing now
[00:38:06] They're killing all of us and their ability to get pussy from little boys by putting fentanyl and everything not even the opiates
[00:38:12] Even if you're a businessman you can't do your smokes who snorts starts Christmas
[00:38:17] Even if you're a businessman who's trying to do six episodes of a podcast in one day
[00:38:22] We got a little pick me up at episode three. We got to think about it. You're scared. Yeah
[00:38:27] Is the CIA trying to kill us? Oh fuck yeah fight
[00:38:42] Suck my penis that's it dude. You know what? That's a good. This is your penis speaking
[00:38:46] I'm gonna start thinking about all the like supernatural shit Greek people
[00:38:50] Because I don't think there's that much I guess they believe they used to believe in gods that fucked the people
[00:38:57] Up to their mountain right right yeah, that's kind of magic, but now it's a very Greek Orthodox
[00:39:02] I mean now it's an Orthodox country. I mean super Greek Orthodox. There's no other type as soon as my hair goes gray
[00:39:08] I'm dressing like a bromin senator. Okay, Togas all the time. I love it. I'm going Cicero
[00:39:16] They would have different colored togas, too. I think Julie Julius Caesar would do purple
[00:39:21] Yeah, and he would get real he would fuck pussy and get fucked by guys. Yeah, I didn't know that my brother
[00:39:28] My brother's a history buff. He let me know. Yeah, I thought you said that people thought you should only get fucked if you're that's Roman
[00:39:35] I have nothing to do with the guys who stole our whole swag
[00:39:38] That was the TV show Rome never seen room Augustus is constantly sucking or well now
[00:39:46] You know what he is a show Caesar Caesar has this as epilepsy
[00:39:50] Sure Caesar has epilepsy and Augustus has to like take him into a closet to hide his epilepsy from people
[00:39:56] So he sucks was cocked and more Augustus is like
[00:40:02] Like is like he goes tells his mom and she's like what were you doing in the closet with you're getting cheeky with you like implying
[00:40:08] There are sons sucking her brother's dick
[00:40:12] I've been watched that show in a while. Yeah, that's awesome. She used to get it and she'd get like dicked down by like
[00:40:16] Soled Holly Walker in that show. Yeah, dude. You should watch that show. It's really good. Okay, a lot of a lot of titties
[00:40:22] I haven't seen it for like a decade either. I love it. It's great. You know, I think maybe my old roommate Josh
[00:40:28] Remember in the Baltimore house for his me George and Josh. You never made it there Adam. You're already in New York
[00:40:35] Josh watched a couple I think he watched a couple episodes of room. So I caught bits and pieces
[00:40:40] Yeah, that's it's like it's it's like cinemax or something like trash. No
[00:40:45] Between BBC and HBO. Oh, maybe I'm thinking about a trash your show. What's they're gonna Spartacus
[00:40:51] I am thinking of Spartacus. Yeah, I am thinking Spartacus. Yeah, you saw there was a you saw a lot of big cock in Spartacus
[00:40:57] Sorry, his was kind of just gay porn is yeah. Yeah, straight porn a little bit too
[00:41:04] Just pour there's it's kind of gay. Oh dear God
[00:41:15] That's my favorite part of the show is a we started playing songs for about 10 minutes
[00:41:19] Yeah, and then look at porn on that was Google a different actresses breasts
[00:41:24] Every fucking three episodes which it's like it starts off ironic because it's like oh this is what this would be funny
[00:41:30] Do they old man would do yeah, but now I just love it now. I'm a gay old man. Yeah
[00:41:36] Titties do you love to get a little suckle on these yeah?
[00:41:40] She gets fucked a lot in that show and she's fuck a lady in that show too, and she's um
[00:41:46] Caesar's mom or who is she? She's her sister. They actually hired me as a fucking coordinator really yeah to make sure that it was like
[00:41:56] Did we're like high period appropriate? We're like hiking boots and a headset and I have sex with all the women on the show
[00:42:01] Yeah, and they're having sex knee pads and stuff you're watching those sex scene and you're like he should be much
[00:42:06] Close she should be shoved all the way in how would his penis even fit?
[00:42:10] He's got to be all the way close to her bunch each to for it to work okay cut all right
[00:42:14] I everyone back to one and you can we just get her back blown out real quick. Yeah
[00:42:23] Okay, I you're you're fucking for four straight minutes, but no one has to pause and suck your dick to get it hard again
[00:42:33] No real person has sex like that and most Roman soldiers would leave the sandals on mm-hmm to get grip to get grip to get
[00:42:44] Yeah, the Air Force ones of antiquity those sand those fucking gladiator sandals. I gotta try that one time
[00:42:52] Fuck with shoes on yeah, but naked with a pair of
[00:42:56] But I have been you'll sweat up in the moment and he socks push down. Yeah fresh white sneakers white knee socks push down fucking
[00:43:06] That's awesome in a locker room. I've never tried those like all pornography in the 1980s
[00:43:11] Lock her there was a lot of lock on a shitty exercise equipment. Yeah, cuz cuz I think everyone was jacking off to like Jane Fonda
[00:43:21] Mercials that's really so many infomercials that you were basically get half jacking off to you'd have to jack off to that
[00:43:27] And so they figured let's just go the whole way smart. We can go the whole way
[00:43:32] Yeah, there's a show you my day. There was like a fitness thing going on. There's that that Olivia Newton John song
[00:43:42] Honestly leg warmer thing going on I like that and I would like I have jacked off to a couple
[00:43:48] Girl like there's just girls in there like workout clothes is fucking hot
[00:43:52] Pop, you know, it's great a big pair of titties. They come out of a exercise, bro. Yeah. Oh my god
[00:43:58] It's like a fucking magic. Yeah nice oopsie days when they pop out of a fucking sports, bro. Mm-hmm. I'm like
[00:44:08] I'm like let me fuck your fucking policy you fucking bitch
[00:44:13] Anytime I see a tit come out. I have the bill and Ted electric guitar come on
[00:44:24] Every time I see a titty. This always makes me I like imagine I think I've said it before but like the
[00:44:30] X-Men's name. It's like you imagine Cyclops shooting a laser beam into your hands. No, it's like like like a
[00:44:35] Like a human body like spinning kind of in the danger room. Yeah, and then its gender is being changed by lasers
[00:44:53] Dude just don't worry next episode. Yeah, we'll get them. We'll get back next episode
[00:44:57] Which is the website you already heard on Wednesday folks. Yeah work
[00:45:01] I like they were committed to shooting these really or according to these really I don't I can't believe you broke another yet another
[00:45:07] Cable you I didn't break it then why is it always your microphone? It is true. It's not true to stop spike funniest
[00:45:19] There's a natural unbelievable I say there's a natural redundancy
[00:45:25] And it requires some sort of reinvestment
[00:45:29] On you you fucking fucking sing like I didn't blame you
[00:45:34] I just said that I do used to have a bad chord reflexively blamed me. It wasn't a blame
[00:45:39] It was just like yeah equipment goes bad, you know
[00:45:46] Buying it you could have said that you didn't have to immediately point to me and say no you did that about all new shit
[00:45:52] Because the microphones were all dented up and the cords were broken and I said to you
[00:45:56] It's like hey at the end, you know don't ban them. I guess near the connectors
[00:46:00] Because someone told me that might do it and also don't drop the microphone on the ground
[00:46:03] I don't do that you did drop it one time the first time you did like it was funny
[00:46:07] It was fun because you look at your phone you have you do rest everything on your lap
[00:46:11] And you just get up and drop shit all over the ground. I will admit you did that just fine look
[00:46:15] I don't have any respect for your apartment your thing so I get it. It's fine. Yes, that is you that is kind of the climate
[00:46:20] You foster Nick. Yeah, no, it's I get it like I don't give a shit you leave trash all over my apartment all the time
[00:46:25] I don't care because I will in kind come to your apartment and eat everything in your fridge and smoke a pipe and you
[00:46:33] But if you're like if you're like all my apartments fucked up because there's pipe smoke everywhere
[00:46:37] I'll be like you goddamn right there. You're right. I'm not gonna say stop did it. That's true
[00:46:43] That is true. Maybe it's actually that wasn't what I was maybe it's maybe it's fat air that he breathed out
[00:46:48] So I don't know about that part maybe it's smoke from a deep fryer that he was fucking coughing. Are you serious? Yeah?
[00:47:10] Stick a fucking day. I'm a good you want to fucking X-men the most rogue hey, that's it. Yeah, it's good. We're fucking kind of questions
[00:47:17] It's right. It's rogue. It's really in fact
[00:47:19] I here's the fantasy you fuck rogue and then you take your time
[00:47:22] You know like a monkey picks bugs out of another monkey's hair selecting
[00:47:26] Specifically the gray strands to hold on to while face fucking that's so you don't have any brown hairs
[00:47:45] Missionary but then it like worse and it's a guy
[00:47:48] Dustin Hoffman and he's like well Adams like what the fuck and then the legs break and they wrap around them and then the dick
[00:47:53] Loops around and starts fucking out. Oh wow, and he's like oh I hate this. He's just coming curried
[00:47:59] Yes, I'm all over my body's betraying me. I'm being betrayed by my body as I'm raped
[00:48:05] It's gonna make it good. Yeah, just hold the hold it here, bro. Yeah
[00:48:11] No, I did that before and it cut out. You got to hold it tight
[00:48:14] You got to stop breaking the equipment. I didn't break it. I just stop breaking the equipment man. It's fucking we got another court
[00:48:21] It's good, but then we we're gonna have guests and we're about to have some guests
[00:48:24] Maybe we need some masking tape on her or something. Oh Adam just needs to not break the equipment
[00:48:33] I wonder if I have some when elders can bring it with in I think I might have a
[00:48:37] Yeah, well, he's got it. He's tied it around the leg chair
[00:48:44] Five people at once we never theoretically do six we could do six. Yeah, I have one extra mic from
[00:48:51] When we did true, none I brought it with me like you in your bag
[00:48:54] Yeah, my bank, but I don't have an XLR the thing is there's no there's only four headphones spots
[00:48:58] Whatever dude the guests wouldn't have headphones or I could take them. I don't you know, I could go natural
[00:49:03] Yeah, I'm a professional, but you wouldn't be able to hear the beeps
[00:49:09] But I have a better imagination than everyone here. So that's true
[00:49:14] I live in a world of whimsy so I could put fill in the blanks pretty good imagination
[00:49:19] It's just you do it's just it's you know, we both have good imagination
[00:49:22] It's a dark it's a dark forest mines a happy you have a magical go
[00:49:27] I have a magical cute little yeah. Yeah, it's Candyland in my head. Yeah. Yeah again the yin and the yang
[00:49:33] I'm the big space dick here the gay Nick has Halloween. How are you the way you've just you've distorted?
[00:49:40] My very generous and diplomatic space analogy
[00:49:49] Very Adam like in your behavior. Oh how now you've gone too far
[00:49:54] You're brain your brain is is Candyland Nick's brain is you know, I love the ween town
[00:50:00] My I love the way the mic just cuts out on yeah
[00:50:04] My brain is a is a loop of me receiving the Academy Award for best actress
[00:50:13] Yeah, it's a bunch of compliments and so people have paid you starting at like age four to now
[00:50:17] I watching that on a loop every compliment of every time
[00:50:22] No, it is it really is him even if it was anything about meeting Scarlett Johansson and then he's going well five with you
[00:50:29] Yeah, yeah, this is you got it. You're doing you got a fucking holding it in you got a big no you weren't you stop
[00:50:34] Yes, I was and that's when the problem started
[00:50:37] You got to hold the time. I think it's them the courts. We need yeah, we got to hold it in though
[00:50:43] This happens to me sometimes sometimes you go to a shitty show and the mic is like this
[00:50:47] Yeah, you have to make sure it stays in yeah
[00:50:50] Think of it as your dick fucking think of yourself as a piece of shit. Mm-hmm. We're up to my
[00:50:59] The Christmas poo it's me tally on the towel
[00:51:04] That's an awesome character. Yeah, it's funny. I don't even know how I don't remember how that started that care
[00:51:09] I think it was magical or something. Yeah, I don't know. What are we gonna do today guys?
[00:51:13] We're gonna have a nice day. We're gonna go to the movies. What do you want to do you want to go to that steakhouse?
[00:51:19] Buddy boys steak. What ever it's called. I don't know bogs. Where do you want to take our special visitors bogeys?
[00:51:25] Think of something like that. Yeah, there's that donut guy that emailed me. Yeah, we could go get farther. Yeah, is it? Yeah
[00:51:33] That's a that's like how far well thanks to the donut guy that emailed well, maybe on the way home
[00:51:40] We go how far is it it's in beacon New York? Oh beacons for us. Oh, that's basically back home
[00:51:46] Yeah, it's like between here and back home. Yeah, it's like an hour. It's cute though. I would like it's a huge town
[00:51:51] Yeah, I like taking that bridge over there's a bare-bound bridge. It's nice
[00:51:55] Ben O'Brien always wants to talk talks about beacon. He says he wants to live there. Yeah
[00:52:00] I'm trying to get him to move to New York Hudson Valley. Times are great. I love that shit. Yeah
[00:52:04] Yeah, I would love to just you can have a family move up the Hudson Valley
[00:52:07] But I know I could make it like a year into that before I killed myself
[00:52:12] That's the real shame. That's yeah, who knows man. You might shift. No
[00:52:16] Get that lobotomy if I get the lobotomy. Yeah, or maybe not a fool. Can you get a partial lobotomy? Mm-hmm
[00:52:23] The thing is I just need to wait until society catches up and you can trans into being like a like a skeleton or something
[00:52:30] You know what I mean? Yeah a specter. We've talked about that. You want to be a you want to be a poisonous
[00:52:34] Get this gas. Yeah, you want to be a you want to be a rude mist. Yeah
[00:52:39] It's sort of seeps in and out of places
[00:52:42] And people just feel like uncomfortable. It's like a yeah, damn. It gets yeah. It's gates colder. You're a little sticky. Yeah
[00:52:50] You see things out of the corner of your eyes. Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah
[00:52:56] Unfortunately, you're you're fucking trapped in your mortal coil. Damn. I think we're I think we're not far from
[00:53:05] I saw a sign maybe I'm making this up in my head, but I thought the sign said world's longest
[00:53:12] Okay, what are we supposed to do that information? You know, we should ride on it. We should cold
[00:53:16] We should put Adam on the zip line and then we can pull our dicks out
[00:53:20] And be at the end of the zip line. Yeah, you have hard and he's asked first and or maybe his mouth first
[00:53:26] Yeah, and he asked to watch because he knows what's coming. It's you can't stop it. Can't stop the
[00:53:32] I was thinking about that. I was imagining James Bond strapped down on a table face down
[00:53:38] And a villain being like well, you're about to meet your end miss stop on yeah
[00:53:43] And then there's like a guy attached to a machine on the ceiling and he's because dick is hard and he's lowering
[00:53:49] Yeah, it's slowly being lowered. That'd be awesome towards his ass
[00:53:54] He's like, oh, I gotta have to figure it out. I'm the guys dick is so lubed up. It's gonna slip right in
[00:54:00] Yeah, and fast it's gonna hurt big time. Yeah
[00:54:04] 007 if we find out you're gay you're out of the
[00:54:08] You're the only it's straight man. You have to go back to the army
[00:54:14] To be a spy you become a regular British
[00:54:18] Become a regular British guy. They kind of really I think I don't believe that gays existed before the British military
[00:54:26] Ancient Greece broke him on. Yeah, although that wasn't gay
[00:54:29] We were pan that was exactly those were they were sucking and fucking yeah, they were people that they had normal gender roles
[00:54:34] But you know you have a yeah, you got a little fun. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you philosophize with the boys all day
[00:54:39] Maybe you got a military they invented like all of all of spying and all that that's all just gossip. It's being gay
[00:54:46] Yeah, it's extreme homosexuality right they've taken caddiness to like the burger level the bus dashes and shit and yeah
[00:54:53] Yeah, yeah, the cost guys is yeah, you're right being a spy is one of the gays things of all time. I should yeah
[00:54:59] Yeah, you should be one is that what you're about to say? I should look into it
[00:55:04] I'd love to be an East Berlin. It is gossip. You're right gossiping and East Berlin. Mm-hmm. I think the rush
[00:55:11] Here's what I heard I heard something about the rush
[00:55:16] Yeah, going to art gallery spying on people. Yeah, look at this guy
[00:55:19] gay guy, yeah, yeah, who's what's his name? Kitchener Kitchener first or all Kitchener. He was he invented gay sex in the British military
[00:55:33] You're not kidding. I'm not kidding. What do you mean he invented gay sex? He was he's a British used the British field marshal that invented gay sex
[00:55:41] Oh, it's his name during the bare water. Kitchener. Yeah, Kitchener. Oh nice. Paulie Walker. We're still up. Nevermind. Fuck Kitchener Paul Walker
[00:55:51] Paulie Walker with the biggest balloons
[00:56:05] Let's see what this you want to do Kitchener bug. You know what else is you know what else they invented in that war
[00:56:09] We're cruising in Kitchener, Ontario gay cruising calm. Yep
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[00:56:40] I didn't know Kitchener was a town. Oh glory holes in Kitchener. We got a lot of up Kitchener hero and that finally we get to this guy
[00:56:51] So he literally was the gay guy all the time. Go ahead Nick. Can you can we read? Can we hear a little something about him?
[00:56:57] Um, yeah, he died under mysterious circumstances, which means he was killed by his boyfriend
[00:57:14] I searched his book there's a book about him
[00:57:22] That's awesome. They also in that war invented the British invented concentration camps
[00:57:27] Really so they did gay shit in concentration. Yeah, they were seeing a movie breaker, Moran. Well, that's crazy because Hitler then
[00:57:39] Inventions and turned it against the other. Have you seen breaker?
[00:57:42] Concentration camps now great breaker, Moran. Yeah, sounds cool. Damn. I gotta rewatch that
[00:57:49] Lord Kitchener British Secretary of War for the early part of the First World War was lifelong confirmed bachelor. Yeah, see I'm telling you this guy
[00:57:55] Was this code would this have made his personal life the subject or scrutiny the time would it affect his career?
[00:58:01] This is from Mike Dash three years ago Kitchener sexual I remain to contest the topic for the simple reason that we don't have shut up
[00:58:12] A BBC TV documentary first transmitted in about 19 argue that K was gay
[00:58:16] The LGBT actor was Peter Tachil suggested the Kitchener met his death
[00:58:20] In the arms of his aid to camp Oswald fits Fitzgerald
[00:58:26] Uh a man dismissed contemptuously by ask with the prime minister as Kitchener's familiar
[00:58:34] And ask with by the way, that's one of the gays names I've ever heard sounds a lot like ask kiss
[00:58:39] Um and studies such as world war hero had a platonic love for soldiers and boys. Oh, yeah, real platonic
[00:58:46] Yeah, but this that's about field martial Montgomery who was the he was so Monte yeah, money was uh
[00:58:54] He's like their eyes in hammer. I guess yeah
[00:58:57] The full Monte by his official biographer
[00:59:03] Nigel Nigel man. What you know how to say Nigel. No, I don't
[00:59:07] I was thinking about the carriage from wild dorm berries Nigel
[00:59:13] You've met that's not even a thing. You've never seen the show you listen to it
[00:59:18] You've heard them say Nigel. You've only read about the only read the screenplays. I've only read the yet
[00:59:31] Um such arguments ignore either ignore that fact that Kitchener is known to have come close to proposing marriage to her me on her mindy baker
[00:59:38] Don't forget homosexual ality was outlawed from 1885
[00:59:42] I've subsequently died of typhoid at 18
[00:59:46] So he was brokenhearted. He couldn't go back to women. Yeah. Yeah. He loved her too much
[00:59:52] He that's the perfect cover story for you guys
[00:59:55] For gay guy. I only loved one woman. Yeah, I died. Yeah
[01:00:00] Well, here are the facts most usually advanced here we go kitchener was notoriously and hugely vain
[01:00:04] Yeah obsessed with personal appearance. Yes. He was bored and irritated by most women and had difficulty in remembering their names
[01:00:12] Okay, that's not that's all of us so far. It's not a feminine appreciation for fine porcelain
[01:00:17] Which he collected with unusual avidity. Yeah. He was like this old queen. Yeah
[01:00:27] Indicore such as an obsession with inspecting place settings for dinner and taking immense pains to ensure that no glass or vase
[01:00:33] And no knife fork or spoon was a fraction of an inch out of position his pet dog was a deci it was a poodle
[01:00:41] He installed four pairs of sculptures of young boys in the gardens of his home
[01:00:47] He was famed for his oriental obsession with secrecy and destroyed most of his private papers by tipping them into the ocean during a seavoyage
[01:00:55] Oh, so his fucking diary is about how much he loved cock. Yeah
[01:00:58] The famous feud between Kitchener and Lord Corzon the viceroy of India was a battle of wills between a homosexual
[01:01:06] Curzon and a homosexual with a streak of sadism
[01:01:10] Wow, they're perfect. Yeah, the times corresponding to peaking was told by a British officer who had served with Kitchener in the egypt
[01:01:16] That'd be a fun day like most yeah, officers in the egyptian army
[01:01:23] I think we could workshop the name. Yeah, I do think it has legs the fags starring josh broll in his Kitchener
[01:01:45] Viceroy kuzan, I don't know here's here's the yekuzan here's the
[01:01:49] Uh, here there was a letter that accused him of having gay sex with boys
[01:01:54] And he said here's his response. What a horrible thing this has been about mcdonald
[01:02:00] He had who was a guy who had to testify. I expect he went quite mad
[01:02:06] Did you hear anything of the sorts before about him? I never did
[01:02:10] That was hardly the reaction of a man affected by a similar section full. Oh that guy was gay whatever. I don't fucking care that he's gay
[01:02:20] Okay, stay tuned for the josh brollin movie