Cum Town | Premium | 03/06/2022
[00:00:12] 12 penis all just in here having a nice casual morning watching matlock having a little tostitos cheese dip breakfast
[00:00:20] Dude that case so ruffles barbecue that case so it takes me. It's like a fucking time portal dude. I'm just like
[00:00:26] I'm transported to the more acrossman recreation center
[00:00:32] In southeast Baltimore having my fucking life is going to the YMCA to eat some cheese
[00:00:38] Just having my like eighth birthday there like my parents
[00:00:42] There was a point where they just kind of like you can only do so many real good birthdays, right?
[00:00:47] You can only do so many chucky cheeses so many when I was a baby
[00:00:51] I had my third birthday at McDonald's and then we had chucky cheese at some point
[00:00:56] But when I was growing up I called the play area and McDonald's the birthday room forever
[00:01:01] Yeah, I thought that that was the first thing I ever saw of course birthday. No, that makes sense
[00:01:05] I thought it was just for birthdays. Yeah, I had a couple early birthdays at Mickey D's and then
[00:01:11] But then our rec center just had a little back room where you would they would let you skate do you bring your own?
[00:01:16] Okay, it's now. Yeah, by the way nice smells great smells good. Yeah, dude. We walked in here
[00:01:21] It was fucking clean. There isn't even a hint dream lot. Yeah, well the litter box is broken
[00:01:26] I had to fix it. I figured really that was a problem dude that litter box rules
[00:01:30] I bought the same one for my brother. Yeah
[00:01:32] Fuck it sick. It does fuck up the problem. I have with that is I got it and
[00:01:37] Then I signed up for like like the it pairs with your phone
[00:01:41] Mm-hmm, but it's like I'm locked out of the account and I called them. I'm like how the fuck do I band from there to basically
[00:01:55] The N words box David who did that didn't some author do that. Yeah
[00:02:05] Some world one documentary used to come on TV and they had a dog named
[00:02:08] Well, you know, yeah, I'm not gonna say it. I will spell it. But it was all you won't you won't spell it
[00:02:16] Nick it's a quote. It's a joke. No, no, don't fucking embolden him. Yeah
[00:02:31] That was it was that one time you tried to spell it in Morse code with the beeps. That's pretty good
[00:02:36] I have a shortcut on my phone. I literally good
[00:02:43] Wind talkers where they got Native Americans to do the codes in World War two. I have not they were saying that the whole
[00:02:50] They had Native Americans are dropping it. They're dropping it in Cherokee, you know, they have their own name
[00:02:56] No, they figured out that the Nazis couldn't hack because like they were such
[00:03:00] Specific specific small languages. Oh, so they got like for code. Yeah, they got like Navajos to like yeah
[00:03:11] No, it's that one guy that one actor who plays all the Native Americans. Yeah, who I don't know about these codes
[00:03:17] I probably Mexican the codes are mestizo his name is like like Adam Sands
[00:03:23] Yeah, he doesn't have Adam Sandler. Yeah Adam Sands. Oh, do we do we do Bob?
[00:03:31] Double he Adam sands a man's penis with his dry tongue. Do you do that Adam? No, but they'd like his name
[00:03:39] You sand the man's penis. Oh, it's I'm not I don't speak for every Adam
[00:03:45] It's not fair. I wouldn't expect the same with you guys. I speak for every stop rose you do I
[00:03:51] Speak for stop rose Niarchos who was dating Paris Hilton for a while. Okay. I speak for what does he have to say for himself? He says
[00:04:01] He says fuck you Adam. Yeah, well, he says the pussy was mid
[00:04:07] Paris mm-hmm. I find that to be the case for many skinny blonde girls. I have to admit
[00:04:12] Um, yeah, oh I guess somebody has I didn't even know
[00:04:27] Yeah, you getting cables really good for us, man
[00:04:31] Yeah, cuz I don't even know we're watching matlock on the no, it's true
[00:04:35] It's like you remember when we were talking another episode about how you just go to the movies and you just see whatever is there
[00:04:42] Yeah, you know, it's like that's what having cable with yeah, you just watch what's
[00:04:47] What's there? I have watched a couple movies. We should what I want
[00:04:50] I watch you favorite uncross your legs as long as you're gonna be in my house. What do you mean?
[00:04:54] Just don't sit like that you do have a particularly gay leg cross. Yeah, what is this?
[00:04:59] This is kindergarten. No, I first great. I would even want to dignify with first great
[00:05:06] Takes you's on the dick cabbage. Yeah. Yeah, you do think you're sitting like you're about to make a point about it
[00:05:12] Until I would how dangerous it integration is gonna be no
[00:05:18] I'm on the good side of that. Okay. What is this? I think it's a weird head show. They're like they have very bad
[00:05:26] Disease who's that this is clearly a commercial for like a child's hospital
[00:05:31] This is that husband Adam and that's you stuff. That's not me. This is you guys you and Adam actually you guys doing your
[00:05:38] Your and you know what you're the gay one. We haven't done a basketball podcast for years checkmate
[00:05:43] Well, yeah, you were children when you were doing it, but you know
[00:05:46] We're so young. Yeah, you were inside your hairline stuff. Yeah, I was so thick. We were so young Stan Van Gundy was coaching the Orlando magic still
[00:05:59] Huh or the other Shriners the Shriners who the fuck are the Shriners?
[00:06:07] Free masons, but they were hats like them. I don't get it. What's that right? Hey GGO F a GGO
[00:06:18] That's a fun and then tea at the end and let's add a tea now and then let's bed we're adding the tea at the end
[00:06:28] Oh faggot I got faggot you can't have two G's
[00:06:39] Yes, you could you just split the numbers in between I
[00:06:43] Guess technically is correct. No, hold on you couldn't though. It wouldn't be smart
[00:06:49] It would make things did more difficult. Are you challenging my knowledge of data sets? Yes, actually I am
[00:06:54] You only need five numbers. No, here's the thing. I'm not even challenging your data of your knowledge of anything
[00:07:00] I'm challenging six six. I'm challenging that you don't know what you you're talking about
[00:07:06] 85% of the time, but you say it with confidence and 15%
[00:07:10] 50% you really know what you're talking about. I'll give you that okay, so what's today? I
[00:07:15] Don't fucking know what just tell me what today is today today today a week Monday Monday. How many days in the week are there?
[00:07:22] What the fuck is this what is one out of seven percentage wise
[00:07:32] 15% of the week and it's and you agree that 15% of the time. That's not how percentages work motherfucker
[00:07:39] I'm 100% that's not it at all bitch. Look at this faggot doing the math
[00:07:43] It's just sounded that you confused me with how fast you said 15% it's roughly 15%
[00:07:54] It's 105 isn't it for 14.2 105 would be seven times whatever the fuck
[00:08:01] My point is is that a hundred percent of the time you see me no you're not first of all in fact
[00:08:17] That actually the probability is that I don't see your bitch as mr. B on your smart day
[00:08:23] Even if it worked that way which it doesn't work that way
[00:08:27] If it did I don't ever see you on your smart day and you're always by your own
[00:08:32] definitions you described the percentage in which I'm correct as a function of time
[00:08:40] 15% what is the days of the week that's time that's not no see now we're
[00:08:45] We're squarely in the 85% right now where you have no fucking idea what you're saying
[00:08:50] But you're trying to sound confident about it. I think I think you're confusing the percentage of time
[00:08:55] I'm being wrong with your body fat that's not true at all. I'm not 85% and
[00:09:02] That would be way too much fat even for a very fat man
[00:09:06] It is funny that like all you have to be is 25
[00:09:10] But you have to be a quarter body fat percentage to be people are like this person is they're fat
[00:09:15] That is just a fat person. Yeah, but definition. That's mostly fat. Yeah, right. That's a great point man
[00:09:21] I'm mostly not fat. Mm-hmm. I guess 25% that takes into account organs and bones and
[00:09:27] The all the water and blood and fucking pubes pubes the more pubes you have the less
[00:09:33] 25% is a lot then the less body fat percentage you have really
[00:09:42] I it's I've quite it. Well if the small penis makes the bush look big. I believe that's a native American
[00:09:48] That's your that's from Danny Sands this small penis make the bush that was Danny says like what does it mean?
[00:09:56] What does he mean by his ass this penis?
[00:09:59] This is a small penis the allies be talking about
[00:10:04] This is crazy. Did they hook those Cherokees up afterwards at least?
[00:10:10] Like they got a medal or something. I don't fucking know they get a big house casino or casino
[00:10:15] I don't know I then the movie really didn't cover there after the war life because we fucked most of the and I'm not gonna
[00:10:23] Say we because I'm a I'm obviously of yeah to Sam I've had those in here
[00:10:27] Only one of us was my family wasn't here. What are you talking about in World War two? Oh in World War two. Yeah, yeah
[00:10:36] I thought you mentioned my grandfather in the air when did your fan when was the first my grandfather was the
[00:10:45] 1890 and actually they came over on the gay flower. Yeah, yeah
[00:10:50] And they actually landed on Plymouth cock and they actually all sucked it
[00:10:58] That was the way they waited till the country got gay
[00:11:05] I wouldn't be here, huh? They were gay well they had to had to procreate to fucking to for the farm
[00:11:10] Nick get a family came over when the Statue of Liberty was a man people are sort of the pinnacle of
[00:11:16] Human evolution of the breeding because that's when the species terminates right if you if you're genetically pretty disposed to be gay
[00:11:23] It's because they're like okay. We're done. We're done everything's learn how to dance have a good time perfectly design the interior of the
[00:11:30] Stream now right right that makes sense
[00:11:32] But what you're forgetting is that they had they were homesteaders
[00:11:35] I'm not forgetting anything and so the lesbians and the gay guys would fuck each other only to make children to be in the fields and
[00:11:43] Some people would have the gay jeans some wouldn't and you
[00:11:48] Absolutely you did actually you have the gay gene
[00:11:53] 50 and it would have it's kind of on the same 15
[00:11:55] We're talking about shamous Mullen or what a famous maul was gay as hell. Yeah. Yeah
[00:12:01] She was okay. Well, he he was actually pissed off the potato fam and stopped him from bring all these potatoes in his ass
[00:12:14] Technically you are responsible for pedophilia
[00:12:17] No, the James that's a byproduct of philosophy
[00:12:20] She was the guys are in there thinking all day. They're gonna want to blow off some steam. Okay, shame is Mullen
[00:12:27] He he was supposed to be a boat on your team, but what go ahead? But then he he sailed it around the horn of South
[00:12:34] South America because the horn was cock-shaped and then he landed in the Castro District, San Francisco
[00:12:40] Interesting the Chinese and okay. Yeah, that's interesting. That's when it all started
[00:12:47] Mmm Castro is actually a it's an Irish word. I didn't know that's an old Irish word
[00:12:51] I didn't know that I thought it was just the fact that they put the potatoes in their ashes
[00:12:55] Yeah, well, that's what that was the impetus of getting the Castro movement was putting potatoes in one's eyes interesting
[00:13:06] Which one he pointed I will hear no more he was pointing at his himself and he was pointing at my nuts
[00:13:14] A lot of people assumed he pointed Adam and me
[00:13:17] I think he was actually pointing at himself and then he pointed at my nuts the curtains open in here more
[00:13:21] It's nice with the one is nice nice during the day to have light in your apartment. Mm-hmm
[00:13:26] Well, I just supplement vitamin D and I turn all lights up. Yeah, you don't need light. Yeah
[00:13:31] Do you get a tan from vitamin D? I know you get a tan from like the you're
[00:13:36] Melon and reacting to UV or something could you take pills to get a tan? I don't think so that'll be awesome
[00:13:43] You can't change your skin color with certain medications. Like if you take like like colloidal
[00:13:47] So yeah, what's that a bunch of people are doing that shit during Y2K, right? There's a bunch of people fucking looking like Smurfs
[00:13:53] Yeah, that's pretty funny is it just your face or your whole skin
[00:14:01] Thanks, I don't think blue is a very attractive color. I'll be racist. You're wearing a blue shirt right now
[00:14:06] I'm talking about skin. Oh, yeah, because it's also it's like that weird
[00:14:09] You it's like a fucked up looking blue. It's not like a yeah, it's not like a bright blue. Yeah. Yeah, it's gray. It's gray
[00:14:16] Like I like I've I've said it on the show a lot
[00:14:20] I've definitely jacked off to alien type pornography where a woman is painted bright green
[00:14:26] Oh, yeah, and not V blue. That's a gorgeous and I would love to fuck someone that's body painted Navi blue the fifth element
[00:14:34] Yeah, well, I wasn't really that attracted to her even though she could sing
[00:14:42] No the blue bitch that sings at the end. Oh, so what so what's the premise to that movie?
[00:14:46] So you know the four elements earth when fire
[00:14:50] Water water, right? So they're telling us the fifth element is pussy from space is space pussy space pussy
[00:14:57] It's the fifth. I'm down. That's with the fifth element. It makes sense the fifth element is pussy from a woman who is
[00:15:08] Then it's so awesome that that pedophile these two two of his movies are about one is just about having sex with a child
[00:15:15] But you give her a week. She's at least an 11, but Leon is just straight up about having
[00:15:22] She's she's going through the encyclopedia really fast and then the fifth element is you want to fuck a kid
[00:15:28] You fuck her within that first three day window exactly
[00:15:30] There's Bruce will's fucker. I don't remember. I think the fifth element was love. Yeah. Oh
[00:15:49] Does she get smart she gets yeah, she cuz she goes through the
[00:15:55] Wikipedia really fast and then and then she gets to war in the double use that she gets really sad
[00:16:01] She didn't know what she she got to rape. She didn't even care but war got her sad. Yeah rape
[00:16:09] Actually a hot moment right she's a weird bug shit from the beginning
[00:16:13] Was weird bug guys and they recreate her from the hands of the bug guy. Oh, I don't even remember. Yeah
[00:16:20] Well, I watched it in the middle of a pandemic
[00:16:22] You hadn't seen it before that I'd never seen it before that. Oh, it's a great movie
[00:16:26] I just give a lot of food they chris Tucker Chris Tucker is real and the inner inner galactic gay space radio host
[00:16:34] Who's just doing a show while walking around. Yeah, you're just doing it with a laugh Mike. It's a really good character
[00:16:42] Gary Oldman kills it too. That's a great movie. I remember a lot of hoteps
[00:16:47] The only thing I knew about the fulfillment because of hoteps being mad about Chris Tucker. Mm-hmm
[00:16:53] For being for acting like that. Exactly. I saw it a lot more in memes about how Hollywood is
[00:16:59] Feminizing the so funny that that movie came out
[00:17:02] But break it where Jeffrey Epstein and Gee Lane Maxa. We're like we got to get this eye a guy on the island
[00:17:12] We need him at little Saint James that is true. He got in because he's cool
[00:17:17] Like he wasn't rich enough to be a pedophile at that level of well
[00:17:21] He was best friends of Michael Jackson, too
[00:17:23] Was he there a good pass Michael Jackson was never on that because they didn't fuck boys in that yeah
[00:17:28] You also had his own island. Yeah, he got amusement park in the middle. They got Cassidy. They not even have an island
[00:17:38] United States just behind the shrub in Burbank. Yeah on a ferris wheel Santa Barbara
[00:17:43] Yeah, by fucking Haley Joel Osman. Yeah
[00:17:47] Or just when he would just fuck the kids in the same hotel their parents were staying at but just make the different wing
[00:17:52] Yeah, the hotel the parents down the other side of the hotel
[00:17:58] That's how you know you had the juice. That's how you know you were famous. Oh, yeah, you're just like yeah
[00:18:04] I don't even I'm not going on the island. What a talent. I'm Michael Jackson. He was a talent
[00:18:11] He was a talent. Are you jealous of that?
[00:18:13] Talent in general Michael Jackson's talent anyone's talent. We're gonna say you're now every single person with any type of talent
[00:18:21] Yes, the Chinese guy that plays that can violin. Yeah, I said that. Yeah, what about red panda?
[00:18:27] Wait, what's the talent for that? You don't know her?
[00:18:30] She does the half-time show animal. No, no red but you know red panda Nick sure. Yeah, of course
[00:18:36] She fucking flips the she flips the Bulls. Oh, yeah, yeah, I like that unicycle. Yeah, she rules
[00:18:43] That's talent. That's honestly that's undeniable talent. Crazy talent. Yeah
[00:18:50] Yeah, would you want to be that town and I'm not saying you would be a pedophile
[00:18:53] But would you want to be so talented that you could be a pedophile no one would get away with it?
[00:19:01] Sure, I mean I wouldn't have to be a pedophile, right? But you would be knowing you you'd be tempted
[00:19:08] Well, I could do anything I can murder a hobo you could oh you could murder a hobo
[00:19:13] We could probably murder hobo right now. We got in the heat of the night coming up. Oh, so nice me TV
[00:19:18] Oh, this just this is just local, huh Jersey me TV me TV
[00:19:22] That's what they should call investigation discover damn an old man named Carol. Yeah, Carol O'Connor Archie bunker
[00:19:29] Really? Yeah, that's his name Carol. Yeah, Carol Archie bunkers name is Carol. Yeah, that's why he's so politically incorrect
[00:19:36] The real guy wasn't at all. He was like a lib. Yeah, he was like me dead
[00:19:41] He's actually in real life. He was actually a fact
[00:19:44] Yeah, I don't why that's and then they'll always be funny for me to say to myself
[00:19:52] It's a fact. Yeah, he was actually a fact
[00:19:57] Did you guys see the fucking thing you come or thing you like commercial for the the like gritty fresh Prince show there may be a
[00:20:08] Was laid out in a series of Arthur chew tweets like six years ago really I bet I hope our boys getting paid
[00:20:16] They are for that. I hope the legend is getting paid
[00:20:20] I'm pissed off because they did fucking see doing I can only imagine he's in a food court somewhere arguing with the Sarku samples
[00:20:28] But how if he keeps the child the toothpick he's allowed to have as many as he wants
[00:20:32] See I would argue that if there's as long as I don't have the toothpick you can't cleant you can't prove
[00:20:39] I'm not a different guy. Yeah, well, you're not an idiot. Thank you. I
[00:20:45] Yeah, cuz right there that's incriminating evidence. You can't go up to the Sarku lady with a toothpick in your hand
[00:20:50] You have to fucking get it get it one go to throw it away go to champ sports
[00:20:59] Five tall teeth five tall things for $20 throw one on different color
[00:21:05] I like to imagine him standing on the subway platform
[00:21:07] Tweeting about something and then a mentally ill homeless black guy coming up and trying to push him in front of the train
[00:21:14] But his hands just go in the Arthur's body like this street
[00:21:26] Yeah, he probably should be like, you know a 98 pound man
[00:21:31] He's Frank Louie CK here getting arrested. Oh, he does look like Louie. Yeah, do you remember Louie from the Chicago airport? Oh
[00:21:44] Know it was Dallas. It was Dallas. There might be the heart. No, Chicago's after you took badibles
[00:21:50] I think it was she wasn't it Dallas didn't we get off what we got off in Chicago?
[00:21:54] Then we took a flight to black cop killing a white guy that kind of that's like one of a hot teacher fucks a boy
[00:21:59] You know, yeah, well, it's sort of the technicality of everyone's like come on. Yeah, that that made that kids life
[00:22:11] It would it would be you do feel like black cops should get one every once in a while
[00:22:17] They should get the killer one. It feels a bad white guy
[00:22:28] For the listener at home what episode numbers
[00:22:36] 1983 it is originally aired you were close February 20th 1990. I was almost a decade season three episode
[00:22:43] Oh, you said 1980 said summer 1980 if you want to see a guy that looks like comedian
[00:22:51] Lewis season three episode 15 season three episode 15 in the heat of the night, and it's currently oh
[00:22:57] You almost grabbed a titty. That's him is Lucy K
[00:23:10] How much beating off have you done in front of a woman
[00:23:14] Pre or post-lily because post-lily I kind of got my started doing it. Oh, you started as an homage
[00:23:19] Yeah, I didn't know that's what real comics comics do I
[00:23:33] That's awesome. Oh shit this bitch is about so so right now the Louie character is trying to rape a woman
[00:23:44] She's away from the nice. She's further. She's getting frying pan. I think oh hell yeah Flintstone stop
[00:23:50] Sire and that's heavy his bitch ass up and he's still in his feet damn heavy cast iron
[00:23:55] Now he oh she's fucking his ass up with the cast iron and let's just oh, it's like sorry. I'm not a skinny skateboard guy
[00:24:06] Yeah, then mom's got some sneaky big tits in this show. I think oh one year later. Wow. Wow
[00:24:17] That just goes right back to the kitchen scene. Yeah, it's still raining
[00:24:28] Dude Carol Carol Carol's not a good name for men
[00:24:33] No, I'm gonna let's all girl names used to be boy. That's a woman can't even come up with
[00:24:46] Like I'm Stephanie and some guys like alright, I guess I'll be Hank
[00:24:52] Shannon is the best goes both ways name. We were talking about Shannon Sharp a little earlier, but it's a great name
[00:24:58] Leslie some of the best men of all time. I've been named Leslie Nielsen. Who's the other one
[00:25:03] Lou Ellen Leslie Leslie well in his letter. He's Frazier the
[00:25:12] Benito Mussolini's middle name is Andrea for real. Yeah, well under there. That's Kelsey. Oh, it's Andrea
[00:25:20] Kelsey grammar one of the best guys. I'll see is good Richard Tiffany gear. That's his real name
[00:25:24] I swear to God Tiffany, you know what Tiffany would be awesome
[00:25:33] Dick Tiffany Richard Tiffany Richard Tiffany
[00:25:39] Then he leans over at the pet go and it goes time for breakfast
[00:25:43] To do you think he put a trail of feed up to his ass. Yeah, yeah, I'm 12 crumb
[00:26:00] And he put the mouse in a little tube that makes a lot of that's efficient
[00:26:03] And then pull the tube out and the doors would seal and see this is another
[00:26:10] Vampires house like a like a mummies grave. Yeah
[00:26:16] And you see that naked like that's part of the 15% putting things in your ass
[00:26:20] You know exactly what you're talking about. I'm free. What are you talking about? The 15% of stuff?
[00:26:24] You know the 15% of stuff. You know Adam. You know what I'm getting at here. Oh, yeah, I do. Thank you
[00:26:31] Things like we got a couple. Yeah, I do. No, we don't yeah, we have a couple of truthtellers supreme truthtellers. Thank you
[00:26:37] Well one supreme and one sort of I just feel good to be involved
[00:26:45] My this dude is a really awesome chip. Yeah, here's where they really if this happened. I think I could die happy
[00:26:47] Here's where they really if this happened. I think I could die happy. Okay, let's hear it. Ostito scoops lime
[00:26:54] Yeah, make those they don't they sound I would guess they make those I would think so but I've never seen one
[00:27:00] You've never seen one in the wild. You know, I'll yield you on this
[00:27:04] No, if you're at toastedos you're listening just send send us over a bag
[00:27:09] Yes, send us over a bag. We could pick up toastedos as a sponsor. That would be great. That would be so awesome
[00:27:17] Shit now I want some toasted. Yeah, they got him
[00:27:22] No, take a little riff break for a second. Do you some chips? Yeah, I'm coming in next
[00:27:27] A little too close to the Sun on that uh, hint you guys can do the rest of it. Hold on
[00:27:35] No, it's my turn for two we made a do their own. No, that was great. Yeah, they got him at Sam's Club
[00:27:41] Tostitos lime they're on the Sam's Club comm website. Are you sure you fucking kidding me scoops hint of lime?
[00:27:46] Well, that's it. I'm gonna fucking off myself now now you have nothing. Okay. Let's read the reviews on Sam's Club comm
[00:27:52] Scoops love the hint of lime scoops, but they are so hard to find how about scoops
[00:28:00] And it's a question mark and then there's one chip in every bag where you have to use a magnifying glass
[00:28:06] Which is a little bit of child pornography printed on the middle
[00:28:10] They're like yeah, we're not gonna you're fired
[00:28:12] Okay, another review stop. This is also supporting you. It is about damn time. Thank you
[00:28:27] Yeah, so just but you know, I know we have some supply supply chain issues with Biden, but uh, yeah
[00:28:37] I think we need to get those going I agree
[00:28:42] That those are awesome suck guys chain. Yep. Mm-hmm. How about it's any chain that's Adams wearing around his neck
[00:28:53] Pull him by it and he asked a sucker dicks. Yeah, it's kind of like a it's a family curse
[00:28:58] I do tune into Tucker Carlson tonight to see what he has to say about the supply chain the supply chain
[00:29:04] Where's everything gone? Perhaps up a gay man's ass in California
[00:29:10] Perhaps the governor of California is keeping all the supplies in his ass. Oh wait
[00:29:15] He can't because he's using it for gay sex
[00:29:19] It's pretty good to Tucker honestly, that's a solid talk. Yeah, all you have to say is what is going on. Yeah, what's happening here?
[00:29:26] What's going on? What's that? What's that? I love happened? What is this?
[00:29:30] Conserve your lips off my penis. Yeah, stop rubbing your mustache on my balls. I'm being bent over and fucked in my ass
[00:29:37] What is going on? What's going on? Why is my asshole doing that? Why is it accepting it so readily?
[00:29:51] When did this become the thing I dream about when I close my eyes at night sex has changed a lot
[00:29:58] 40 years ago it involved a man putting his erect penis into a woman, but now I'm getting bent over and fucked in my ass
[00:30:07] What is going on? What's happening and why do I like it so much? Yeah?
[00:30:14] What is happening illegal aliens pouring across the border and into my ass
[00:30:20] Pouring across the border like come is pouring out of my asshole after I've been cream-pied the Democratic Party today announced that they think I'm cute
[00:30:36] You guys all have the same voice Anderson Cooper sounds that's true Anderson's more blase
[00:30:42] He's more like a little bored. He's got a little gay boredom to gay boredom. Yeah
[00:30:46] You have to impress mom you have to impress me my mother was a Vanderbilt
[00:30:51] Conservatives are making the argument that gay sex has changed, but to me it feels exactly the same
[00:31:04] There's no way a rich family like that doesn't molest and now the 18 carol for the rape minute
[00:31:09] I feel scud and her shit. She's just a little of a hurricane for some reason
[00:31:20] In the outer banks of stop sign just flew into my pussy
[00:31:26] Would you say that Donald Trump sent the stop sign is it perhaps from more a logo?
[00:31:30] I can't tell you but if it if it did happen that way. I'm having a great time
[00:31:39] I'm having a great time a grand old Tom Anderson. I wish you a great time
[00:31:44] Anderson you look cute enough to be my girlfriend
[00:31:46] Where do you get your haircut Anderson is anyone ever told you we look like identical to?
[00:32:00] So Vanderbilt that's Vanderbilt. They did railroads, right?
[00:32:05] Yeah, Cornelius got that money all the way back to railroads Cornelius Vanderbilt University the fucking boilermakers
[00:32:11] They had so much money they used to have parties where everyone got like a little like a silver
[00:32:17] Like mini shovel and they give you like a little thing of sand and you dig out like emeralds and rubies
[00:32:23] Whoa and precious gemstones as your party. That was your party gift. Yeah, pretty cool. Fuck
[00:32:29] Do you think they were doing any kind of weird like you know never go to a cavern?
[00:32:37] I've never been to I don't know if I've been to lire. I've been to one. I just remember as a kid going
[00:32:43] Mm-hmm, and they had like a sieve. Mm-hmm where you could collect like rocks or whatever. Yeah, I
[00:32:49] Saw I saw a white I saw a big big old white trash mother
[00:32:59] In line to the Lou Ray taverns. I still remember his name is Austin Austin Austin
[00:33:04] Oh, dude the Vanderbilt Mazel Austin get over here. I'll stand Boston come here now
[00:33:12] Desecrate the body of Anderson Cooper's relatives the Vanderbilt Mazeliam is in Staten Island. Oh, yes
[00:33:19] And you doorp Staten Island the Moravian I believe that the city from the Mario game. That's you donk. Oh damn
[00:33:26] New Donk City. Yeah, I think he got his star that game was awesome. I never played it
[00:33:32] But I might Mario I have if you want I might do I'm about to get into gaming fuck it fuck doing stuff
[00:33:37] Dude the switch is awesome. I've been working. Oh, yeah, cuz it's like it's low stakes
[00:33:42] You don't have to get fucking really involved in anything you put it on it's for babies for babies
[00:33:47] You play with your hands. You could also get a controller if you want one. Yeah, you could also use the game cube controller
[00:33:53] Which is sick. Yeah with the fucking I want a PlayStation 5 but only because I
[00:33:58] Want a PlayStation yeah, I have it and I play it like once I'll never I will never turn that shit on
[00:34:08] Status symbol. Yeah like that red dead redemption to I could get into that but it's like it's just such a fucking like
[00:34:15] Well, it's not an investment. It's I guess it's just it it plays well with your
[00:34:20] Depression but if you get if once you get into something it's like
[00:34:23] Mmm. Yeah, I was just locked when I got COVID. I beat miles more Alice Spider-Man. It was pretty cool
[00:34:32] I think what's the name Cornelius Vanderbilt, mm-hmm. He got his start because he
[00:34:38] He stole his dad's boat and then just started ferrying people like when he was like 11
[00:34:43] Oh, he was doing between a Staten Island and Manhattan really yeah, and then he became like the richest
[00:34:49] You became insanely wealthy just doing just doing uber boat uber basically doing boat uber holy fuck
[00:34:55] Let's see. Let's see what corny that's where he started and this is a
[00:35:06] Worked his way into leadership positions in the inland water trade and invested in the rapidly growing railroad industry
[00:35:12] Dude, I wish we still had trains going everywhere, dude. Yeah, bro. It's fucked up
[00:35:17] That shit looks cool when you watch a movie from like the 1800s set in the 1800s
[00:35:22] Back with shameless maulin was landing on Plymouth cock
[00:35:27] The gayest man in Ireland, oh, I'm gonna go suck some pain is I want to go suck some pain is in yarq city
[00:35:34] I remember arriving in New York Greenwich Village
[00:35:39] He's where I went right to stone wall I
[00:35:41] I sucked off Marsha between the twinks the gossips
[00:35:47] This isn't what it was like in county Cork
[00:35:51] Who says three different skanks fest now? I don't fucking know. We're gonna have it
[00:35:56] We're gonna get post corona. We're gonna get a monthly skanks fest. Yeah Vegas. Mm-hmm. I'm doing Southeast Asia
[00:36:02] Skanks I'm doing touch skank fest Thailand. There are a lot of yeah
[00:36:05] They have like skanks fest Budapest. Yeah, there are a lot of American expats who live alone in Southeast Asia
[00:36:14] Who are really into really big the gas the gas digital
[00:36:23] Yeah, they love bye guys over there a lot of Taiwanese type of expat Thailand patriot expatriates are
[00:36:31] Are sex criminals love? Oh, I'm not saying that we're not making any accusations
[00:36:38] We're just saying that they live alone and live alone their expatriate single men single in their 30s to 60s
[00:36:47] They're really they're really in the real last part. Yes, they love they they follow the fight game with
[00:37:01] The fuck is they show you doesn't like what is being what are their line-ups? They have now today
[00:37:05] What is what's what are they they have a show called by guys with Ian and Zach do they yeah?
[00:37:10] Then what do they talk about pussy and sucking dick and eating pussy mostly?
[00:37:16] There's not enough of podcasts about sex and dating
[00:37:21] There should be more podcasts about Anderson Cooper. Yeah, and and Eugene Carroll
[00:37:28] There should be more podcast about a single nine minute interview
[00:37:34] Maybe every every three weeks stuck in my fucking head
[00:37:39] That was from you said would you say that 2018 the president? I'm not sure I mean just to be clear that that fits the
[00:37:49] Definition of rape well Anderson you have to understand burgdorff Goodman is a magical place
[00:37:57] Anderson burgdorff coming you go in and the salesman treat you like your Marie Antoinette
[00:38:01] I've never I've never felt so alive in my life when I was being shoved into that dressing room
[00:38:10] You know this is Donald Trump in the 1990s
[00:38:26] Have a roller skating birthday party Adam yes, I did yeah, yeah, Crystal Palace skating center
[00:38:33] Do they have a cruising USA machine? Oh, yeah, oh yeah? Oh, yeah
[00:38:38] They had the they had the arcade they have them the poor kids had to rent roller skates
[00:38:43] But you know the cool you had roller skates. I know the cool kids fucking brought their own blades
[00:38:47] You had your own blades. I got my own boy. I was a renter dude. I
[00:38:51] Didn't have the I didn't have the legacy your parents didn't love you
[00:38:54] I didn't have the liquid capital to own. Oh man. I remember they did
[00:39:04] It's like they played like a nice song and you have to hold hands and I my dad was out there and
[00:39:14] Roller-blader. Yeah, I would skate. I didn't have blades. I brought my own
[00:39:19] I don't remember going to a roller skating rink once for my cousins like
[00:39:23] Fifth birthday or something to skateland. No, it was somewhere in Virginia. Oh and I
[00:39:30] I don't remember even skate. I think I was like I did I can't do that
[00:39:34] You didn't even know how to play. Do you didn't skate in your like neighborhood with your friends? Roller skate? No roller-blad
[00:39:40] You're like a decade my parents got like the blades from Costco, you know
[00:39:45] They didn't get the they didn't get the like fancy. They didn't get the grind kind
[00:39:50] You couldn't be seen blading. I didn't have K2's. No way, dude. We play fucking roller hockey on our block
[00:39:55] Yeah, I never got into roll that my mom had roller blades that I would use when I was like 11 or 12 briefly
[00:40:03] Yeah, and I never got into roller-blader. Your mom was on that blade lifestyle, dude. No, she didn't use it either
[00:40:07] They were just why'd she have him? She was a gay guy
[00:40:14] In the Mullen tradition the way they populated the girls
[00:40:19] I don't understand why anything like cuz bikes the bike is the pinnacle
[00:40:27] I remember you know it was really fun one time there was a this girl that stole her dad's like like fucked up prescription glasses
[00:40:37] And I don't know like what the prescription was but you put the glasses on and you looked down on the ground and felt like you were like 30 feet in the air
[00:40:43] Oh, hell yeah, I mean just put him on a rider bike
[00:40:48] Simulating drunk driving which would become your favorite past time of your 20s pretending
[00:40:53] To be high later in life. I did that was my cousin when we got dark side of the moon
[00:40:58] We like pretended we were we turned all the lights off. Yeah, pretend
[00:41:03] Huddled up together pretend to be strong. That was a different cause that albums about an Asian guys like anger problem. Yeah
[00:41:12] You think I'm so docile and good at math. I'm actually pieced
[00:41:17] I got a dark side. I'm bad at math and I'm bad at math and I thought like a mexico
[00:41:25] Yeah, this is a really good character. I'm Filipino. So yeah, that's kind of actually Filipino
[00:41:32] That's that's a little bit like a little bit kind of mexico. I feel like Nick was talking more Chinese guy. Yeah, dark side of the moon
[00:41:43] When's the first time I pretended to be high? I used to I used to like think like I can't wait to be high when I'm older
[00:41:52] I used to think it was like it's gonna be so cool. What was the first time you sparked up, bro
[00:41:59] Yeah, I remember it was my with my friend David
[00:42:03] the like pool by his parents house vegas in vegas
[00:42:08] And uh, he twisted up he grabbed he ripped a bunch of grass out of the floor and then he twisted that up
[00:42:16] And they made me hit it and I started coughing. It was like this is tastes like chemicals is disgusting
[00:42:20] He's like do you feel high? I was like, I don't know and there's wait. How do I grasp?
[00:42:24] She's like, ha ha pussy. That was grass, you know, he played right trick to you
[00:42:28] But then later on we did actually smoke weed. How old were you?
[00:42:33] 13 12 nice. Yeah middle school. So oh, yeah
[00:42:37] The J's the J's like getting started on the green first before the booze
[00:42:43] Yeah, that's true. The first kid I knew who was smoking weed was like a 12 year old Jewish kid
[00:42:47] Yeah, I don't know why but who we went to the green. I got to say I did see some some anti-Semitism jumped out
[00:42:54] With my family when he invited me to his birthday party
[00:43:00] They were just kind of like criticizing the spread because we were poor too, but when it was a party
[00:43:04] You go you got to eat this kid had like, you know his mom baked like a fucking, you know
[00:43:14] Box cake with like shitty frosting that was like his birth. It was like a like a square little cake
[00:43:20] There's like 12 kids. There's not a shake. Yeah, there's like two pizzas and like one bag of chips bullshit
[00:43:30] I do maybe I'm maybe I'm thinking back and putting anti-Semitism under her, but she was just like well, you know
[00:43:38] He's and it's like never mind the fact that all my other friends were also Jewish and had sick parties
[00:43:43] But I think the problem was this kid's mom looked at the she looked the most Jewish I've ever seen in my life
[00:43:51] So it was kind of like it did fit the stereotype, but truly one of the most bullshit parties. I've ever been to in my life
[00:43:57] And I'm gonna blame anti-Semitism for it. I blame the oldest
[00:44:08] And that's what and you know what I was just like pissed off and like a fat child. I was like, you know what maybe Jews are cheap
[00:44:16] Look at look at Eugene Carroll's ex-husband
[00:44:28] Miami vice television show he is hot, but anyway, so you and David sparked up anyway that kid
[00:44:34] Yeah, I spoke with David I spoke with David's the kid that's like just at 12 13 will be forever be the funniest person I've ever met right right and then he had to
[00:44:43] He had to go to a different school for being bad
[00:44:49] Common by your name situation between Adam and this guy. Yeah, we called each other by them and the parents found out in their life
[00:44:55] We've got to do something about this Adam's asshole has been disfered him's getting fucked in his ass
[00:45:01] 13 years old he can't still be wearing diapers
[00:45:05] We spent all our money on roller blades and diapers
[00:45:12] Nothing is friend ravage him repeatedly ravage him. I said to him. What are you?
[00:45:24] Are you aging carol being interviewed by Anderson Cooper
[00:45:31] What was he carol's thing like what does she do? Oh, she was a journalist. Yeah, oh, she's a writer
[00:45:37] She's yeah, she's like fucking she's been around for like 200. Look at Tom cello's hair. How is that possible? He's awesome, dude
[00:45:48] He's like fucking that's a good look. He's older than Eugene Carroll. Yeah, he looks awesome
[00:45:52] You think he's wearing a wig or you think he's just blessed a lot of people wonder how I keep my hair
[00:45:57] I'm a lot of people also wonder why I can't remember what I sound like
[00:46:07] You're accusing Tom Selleck of rape just kidding
[00:46:14] I'm Jimmy JJ Walker. This is my house to work my wall of good times memorabilia
[00:46:20] God damn that is the most hilarious green screen I've ever seen it's green is bouncing off his bald ass head
[00:46:26] Yeah, this is my living room where I have a picture of myself
[00:46:31] Allion which feels racist two other pictures of myself just a sad weird African
[00:46:52] That's it's funny that Trump said to Eugene after me, baby. You're gonna be ruined for anyone else Jesus
[00:47:02] What to wait? Did he rape her or did he they fucker? What's going on here? Which I think
[00:47:08] The official takeaway in my mind was yes, but she also thought it was sexy
[00:47:16] I don't like right because that's what I'd say away from the answer they think I
[00:47:22] Don't think people think rape is sexy. They think of the sexual fantasies
[00:47:31] So I don't you've seen it more than us Nick. What do you think did he rape her? No, no, I mean they definitely fucked right?
[00:47:41] No, you mean you went into a dressing room with the guy you were flooring with a guy on the street
[00:47:44] You went into a department store you decided to both try on lingerie in the dressing
[00:47:50] He tried on lingerie too. Yeah, she was like, you know, he was like why don't you try this on?
[00:47:55] She's like, well, you try it on he's like all right and then they went into the dressing room together
[00:47:59] And then he started like making out with her and he went in lingerie in lingerie Donald Trump was in a full
[00:48:07] And then he said after this you're gonna be ruined this is so funny if you Google Eugene Kelly
[00:48:13] But you know, it's like people also search for each up Kelly. You mean Carol. Yeah, and people also search for it
[00:48:20] It's like her ex husband. How about Eugene Carol O'Connor Donald Trump and then and he's Kevin Neeland Kevin Neeland
[00:48:27] I don't know. Did he fucker also? I get it. I told you for the last time it was sexy
[00:48:40] I'm not throwing it in it. I got an interview with Anderson Cooper tomorrow
[00:48:51] Come on, Archie if you don't speak up, he's gonna go rape other people. I
[00:48:56] Was in Burghoff Goodman for the last time mead head. I wasn't right. I was trying on lingerie. It was an attack
[00:49:17] I feel like I'm being raped right now in my own house
[00:49:32] Well, how you doing mr. Bunker all Lionel come in here. You probably know something about rape
[00:49:38] You've probably done a couple of rapes yourself. Usually you're going to an alley and use a gun, right? Oh, that's right
[00:49:47] It's like winking at Michael come on Lionel don't egg him on
[00:49:56] If he's gonna rape somebody's he's using a gun in a mask
[00:49:59] It's not dressed up like a French maid in the Burghoff Goodman locker room
[00:50:08] That season 3 episode 2 Archie gets raped by Donald Trump
[00:50:13] You Jean Carol look where where did they live in all the family Queens Queens
[00:50:39] But you have to understand who Donald Trump was then Shakespearean
[00:50:51] Yeah, that's a really good episode yeah, I remember that they taught them in my history of television class
[00:50:58] That was the most important episode of all the family
[00:51:04] Sockin dick is the professor walking in is a huge auditorium and he's like tostidos chips no speaking of scoops with lime
[00:51:13] By the way, I'm sorry. I wasn't really paying attention when you were
[00:51:18] Doing that great research. Yeah, what's up? So you can't find them right? Can you try and buy them now?
[00:51:24] They're on the stamps club comm website, so I
[00:51:30] Couldn't tell you what other places have them, but you know we can look it up
[00:51:38] I just vacuumed the floor so I spilled salsa and I instinctively started stuffing it into my shoes
[00:51:47] That's the problem dude, yeah, I'll never be clean. That's a problem of a lifetime of being a bad kid
[00:51:52] When you become the adult you still treat your own things like they're your parents
[00:52:01] So I can dig in fucking ass fuck my ass and call me
[00:52:17] Gay ass family is filmed in front of a live studio audience. All right, so I'm gonna look up tostidos lime
[00:52:25] Tostido scoops it's hint of lime scoops hint of lime. Yeah
[00:52:31] Scoops and we're gonna see if I can get them online
[00:52:39] What are the other buttons your press and stuff mostly that I'm scrolling
[00:52:48] But you could just get you just get hit I see a lot of hit the lime
[00:52:55] You don't see any hit the lime scoops. Yeah, you know I might be getting back into the restaurant style chips
[00:53:01] I like that the big guys the big guys black guys restaurant style so I can feel like I'm out to the family somewhere
[00:53:07] That feels nice. I said it would be my apartment
[00:53:09] Right watching all in the family and then repeating everything they say except but I'm gay
[00:53:17] tweet some woman says can y'all please make lime flavored scoops K
[00:53:22] Thanks, right could y'all and then tostido's replies we produce tostido scoops
[00:53:27] Intive lime for a limited time the snack is currently enjoying retirement, but we'll be sure
[00:53:32] Fuck that to share your interest with fuck that bullshit dude. Thanks for being a tostido snack doing this like
[00:53:40] You know put it on the fucking shelves you cock
[00:53:42] Every snack companies does this like you could have had a bad bitch. I hate that they do it all the time. I hate that
[00:53:50] Maybe it's your fucking marketing you guys if you're listening
[00:53:53] Let's let's do a tweet campaigns our friends. Thank you once these hint of lime scoops. Let's get it going
[00:53:59] Let's get a trending. Let's get it going
[00:54:01] Let's let tostido's know that we are watching
[00:54:05] You know the world is watching if you catch my drift tostido's
[00:54:14] And you better do them in a couple weeks
[00:54:17] In a couple yeah, we want to do I super buy the Super Bowl by Super Bowl Sunday
[00:54:23] Otherwise that we will otherwise we will we will blow up the soup
[00:54:33] If I don't get hit a lamb chips, I wouldn't be at that stadium on Super Bowl Sunday
[00:54:38] Oh, I'll put it that way. I just want to let all the Jewish people know
[00:54:44] Every if you're Jewish oh Jews called out of the Super Bowl that day Jewish and you have Super Bowl tickets
[00:54:59] Suck the cock damn dude that guy just looks like even fatter. I'm too bunker
[00:55:03] It looks like it's all that's what all men look like until 1990. That's what Anderson or Tucker Carlson wants to go back to you hit 40
[00:55:15] What happened you used to be able to sit on anyone's lap and ordered Santa go
[00:55:21] Democrats will tell you that the North Pole melted because of climate change
[00:55:24] Which we all know is a fake homosexual conspiracy cooked up by Jews and Latinos
[00:55:34] Yeah, we'll see too much Jew Jewish Latino intermixing that's right because we spend a we spend so much time killing one another right
[00:55:43] You know we don't know what we in Miami. We don't know what we're possible. We're capable of the battleground of Miami
[00:55:48] We're just my jamming beef AOC took a break from scolding people about communism and wearing a mask to wipe her pussy in a public
[00:56:07] Don't believe me just well that's the Bruno bars. Don't believe me. Just watch moment of the week
[00:56:16] Well, how do you know anyone who's half Jewish half Latino? Yeah, you do well. I know Latin Jews
[00:56:26] Oh like one parents like yeah, I do yes, I know for I have a friend of the girl
[00:56:31] She hop whose dad is Jewish his mom's Cuban crazy hot
[00:56:39] Well, I don't think any guys are hot I'm only into chicks. No, you think a lot of guys
[00:56:43] Every single chick too. You think a lot of guys are hot. They don't hot anymore
[00:56:52] Used to look at any guy walking down the street and my dick would get hard guys used to be hot
[00:57:05] Yeah, man, I'm really you shouldn't fucking we should be executive producer and showrunner I would love that
[00:57:12] That would be so good. I would fucking love it because then it's like all the people that hate me
[00:57:17] I'll be like see I told you he's spreading fascist propaganda. Let me watch this show
[00:57:23] It's just like Garfield the cat is a fact
[00:57:29] Was a guy yeah gay much. Mm-hmm. Can you believe it?
[00:57:33] Nirmal was the first. Yeah, fem boy, California population has decreased
[00:57:39] 25% over the last year where are they going perhaps the bathroom?
[00:57:42] We go live now to take another look at AOC's pussy. It's wipes it
[00:57:49] They truly are obsessed with AOC. Well, she's hot. Yeah, she's big tits. Yeah, that's all it takes and I will say that is
[00:57:57] It's funny though cuz she's like she does do that. She does that thing where she's like anyone that criticizes me
[00:58:02] Just he's like wants to fuck me or something. Yeah, she does see what she's like literally the opposite. I
[00:58:08] Don't give a fuck what she does. Right, you know like fucking
[00:58:13] Crying and before voting present at the you know to send rockets to
[00:58:19] Israel or whatever Israel. I don't give a fuck. Yeah, you know if it had been Adam that had done it
[00:58:24] I've been like that piece of shit. Mm-hmm, but you got a nice pair you got a nice heavy parallel
[00:58:28] But I'm just you're not you don't know her. I'm quietly undressing a static image of her with like a with like a
[00:58:36] Computer yes, yes, yes, yes the clothes just come off click they kind of click on magnetic
[00:58:44] The clothes off of her and then writing my girlfriend
[00:58:51] And Microsoft paid should I go find that fat ginger that she's dating and fuck him up and be like I want dibs on the pussy
[00:58:59] Who Matt is Matt dating AOC. Yeah, Matt Christmas. I didn't know that. Yeah, he's our friend. We can't beat him up
[00:59:05] You're right if it was any other motherfucker's any other guy. I'm cracking my knuckles and I'm going
[00:59:15] No, but it'll sound like no I got something Michael Winslow used to do that. Yeah to make
[00:59:21] Weapon noises that guy sort of is like the pussy Jeff Bezos if you think about it Michael wins
[00:59:26] No, no the fucking AOC's boyfriend. Oh, huh? The ginger guy
[00:59:30] Mm-hmm, because you know you look at Jeff Bezos and you like to hear about like oh, he built he bought himself a
[00:59:36] Lamborghini rocket ship, right? I don't want to fucking hear about this guy or whatever now if let's say money
[00:59:42] Didn't exist and there was just like like getting
[00:59:47] Acquiring power and then also nice piece of ass nice piece of pussy pie. That's the guy where you like this motherfucker
[00:59:54] Because it's not only I mean she is attracted right she's also just a fucking converse one. Yeah, you know
[01:00:01] And what does he do you like fucking I think he was just getting top when she was tending bar
[01:00:05] Yeah, he doesn't do shit. He's like fucking does like Funko pop unboxing videos
[01:00:13] You know for him good for one of them. Mm-hmm. Yeah
[01:00:17] One of them one of those soy boy motherfuckers got some actual one of them made it out there
[01:00:22] Yeah, yeah, cuz there were so many guys got enough red at gold
[01:00:25] There's so many guys like that that were like this is my end they got some suspenders and a little like flat cap
[01:00:30] And they went to the DSA meetings. Yep. They're like this is how
[01:00:34] This is how I prove because it's not you know, you don't have to just be like yes, mommy
[01:00:39] You're right about right the wage gap. You can be like oh the workers
[01:00:46] And it didn't work. Yeah, but acting for one guy that guy and for those you guys find something else
[01:00:52] It's over the one guy did it. There ain't another AOC coming anytime soon pal
[01:00:58] Yeah, and you're certainly not gonna fuck her if there is you know so getting you thing and that concludes this episode of come town