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Bonus 30 - Race Cum

Cum Town | Premium | 04/03/2017

[00:00:00] Okay, this is round two. I fucked up or Adam fucked up. Yeah, Adam fucked up and didn't put
[00:00:07] We had to get a different SD card and the thing about SD cards is you got to put the tiny one in the big one
[00:00:14] I thought it was like two different sizes. No, they dock
[00:00:17] It's like it's like gay guys. Yeah, it's like gay guys cool
[00:00:21] That's what they do. They dock they dock each other which you know, they already do
[00:00:26] I think it's kind of fucked up the technology uses gendered terms
[00:00:30] To describe like male and female so did that check right and the guy got fired and then she ended up getting fired
[00:00:38] I have no idea what you're talking about, but yes, that sounds exactly like something that it was like they come here
[00:00:44] Joke about dongles. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I remember that you gotta you gotta come up on these mics. Oh, sorry
[00:00:49] Yeah, yeah, she made up
[00:00:51] She got mad like and I can't remember what her fucking title was it was unbelievably annoying though
[00:00:57] They named the title mom of the internet. Yeah, it was like something like Paul monitor of something
[00:01:02] And like what the fuck do you do? Yeah, like why are you here? I don't they always have like chief tech dreamer?
[00:01:08] Like babe, yeah, no, it's some shit like that. It was a name like that. Yeah. Yeah, what do you imagine here?
[00:01:13] It's so funny when businesses try to make like work fun and
[00:01:17] And they just make fun suck the worst job I ever had was like at the tech startup
[00:01:23] He plays I worked for three months where everyone's just playing FIFA and I was like the new guy there
[00:01:28] And I was like can I play next game and they're like we don't have enough controllers
[00:01:32] I was like what is this third grade really all over again?
[00:01:36] I'm like be bullied for being at the fun office. That's like a little brother bullying too
[00:01:40] That's why I told my younger brother when I was played in Tendo that was also the name of the business was third grade solution
[00:01:47] By the way, did we okay, so this is car medsker also?
[00:01:50] Yeah, this is also a race where's episode? Oh, yeah, sorry
[00:01:53] I forget when we we fucked up and and didn't record like four and a half minutes of
[00:01:58] What this podcast we talked for four gold? Yeah, it was great. Is it race town or come wars? This is it's race come
[00:02:07] Yeah, well, they're all different flavors black comp
[00:02:10] Yeah, yeah
[00:02:12] Yeah, this is a dual episode because me and Kurt are both in town
[00:02:15] And then I guess we both have to figure out a way to do both podcasts
[00:02:20] So hey if you're paying for the premium episodes both podcasts guess what you just got fucked over
[00:02:27] Yeah, this is like when you know what happened to me like a month ago. I started watching all of the newer segull movies
[00:02:34] Yeah, they're good. They're the best of all of them. They're incredible
[00:02:38] Well, I started like two months ago. I was like I'm gonna watch every single I started trying that with Van Dammit didn't work out to
[00:02:44] Well, I did that years ago actually to revisit van dams newer work. No, not well JCVD is good
[00:02:51] That's a good movie right right now. I know but yeah, it's like, you know direct to video action
[00:02:55] Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh wait. Hold on. I saw one that was kind of good with him versus Orlando
[00:03:00] Mmm fucking Orlando Jones from Orlando Jones from Matt TV
[00:03:05] The make seven of yours guy. Yeah, no way. It was not bad. It was really not bad. I was the bad guy. Mm-hmm and
[00:03:13] I sat through it
[00:03:15] It was not bad movie. Yeah, what it's called, but those guys like a park park ranger ex
[00:03:21] Marine and then this gangster comes to kill him because he got the guy's brother killed. Yeah, and then van Dammit comes to a
[00:03:28] I don't know. I don't know what he does. He drugs mugler, but yeah, it's just like a lot of woods fighting and cool shit
[00:03:33] Yeah, well like Seagal started doing direct a video in the 90s and now he's doing like direct to Romania
[00:03:39] Yeah, like if you want to buy like physical media copies of Seagal's movies
[00:03:44] It has to happen in like the same place that a teenager is being sex trafficked. Yeah in the dark
[00:03:49] Yeah, they're like snuff films at this point pretty much dude. I mean somebody should kill him
[00:03:56] He does nothing because he's 64 years old and he's morbidly obese 64. Yeah
[00:04:02] Yeah, dude when above the law came out like his first his first movie he was like 34 35 years old and that was that was like
[00:04:11] 1987 or some shit
[00:04:13] Well, he was a stunt coordinator. It was a stunt coordinator
[00:04:17] He's like a guy that did martial arts lived in Japan for a while came to the United States started wearing pajamas exclusively
[00:04:23] Yeah, well, he was like coordinating fights and some agents some like coked up 80s agent like found Seagal
[00:04:29] He's like I'm gonna make this guy a star Steven Seagal. Yeah, and when did he fucking the mob get in get their hooks in
[00:04:36] him that it enforced him to make out for justice
[00:04:39] Above the law those are the good ones. Those are the those are the early shitty ones. He says the mob made him make
[00:04:45] Um, I don't I'm not familiar with that good. They work on it good
[00:04:49] Don't worry fucking slugs that guy in the gut who's yelling at him where he parked his car
[00:04:53] And he just gives me a dead shot and his fucking stomach. Yeah, it looks awesome
[00:04:57] Well, there's I mean his whole thing was that he never like his like cuz he does a keto or whatever
[00:05:03] Yeah, so his whole thing is like not actually moving much
[00:05:07] That's a great idea. Yeah, and when he was like, you know 34 and still kind of in shape
[00:05:12] It like looked impressive, but now he won't get out of a chair. You know people have to like come to me
[00:05:18] No, it's a martial art. You can do seated. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, but
[00:05:22] The only reason I brought that up is is like I got into the later
[00:05:27] So goal is we call on the show the goatee era segull so anything where he has a goatee
[00:05:32] Which is he's got a goatee now is a goatee any exclusively speaks like a black person. Yeah
[00:05:37] Well, that started with glimmer man in like old jasmine
[00:05:39] 96 he did a movie with Damon Wayne's and for whatever reason he went from being Chinese to being like a pan
[00:05:46] Africanist like Creole guy
[00:05:48] Yeah, and you know, you know, he's like listen up baby bird
[00:05:53] I'm gonna tell you how to get out of this game, you know, and it was like this bizarre transition
[00:05:58] And now that's just his voice in every movie. That's amazing
[00:06:02] Yeah, but any of the newer ones so I started watching them
[00:06:05] But I was paying for all of them and I talked about him on the show and literally I think it was because of me
[00:06:11] The very next week they were all free on Netflix
[00:06:13] It was the come town bump. Yeah, the chop of boys went in on it
[00:06:18] Yeah, so if you if you are paying for this on race wars in come town, you're being segulled
[00:06:24] That's the second biggest pop culture
[00:06:28] Accomplishment we've had since they just announced we did it. We were riffing on the beauty and the beast
[00:06:36] Movie on how Gaston's friend is a gay guy. Mm-hmm. Why is that a big thing? I keep seeing that well
[00:06:43] They just announced that's that's come town
[00:06:46] Mm-hmm someone at the ears was listening to come town you guys said it first we were doing we did it as a bit
[00:06:52] And then they just announced
[00:06:54] It was gay and then that movie came out and they were doing publicity for the movie
[00:06:58] I love this story too because like they were doing publicity for the story and the director was like oh
[00:07:02] LaFou is definitely gay and then a bunch of theaters in the south were like
[00:07:07] Smoothies canceled. We're not showing it here and they're like, it's not that gay
[00:07:11] Yeah, why would you I mean what a weird thing to fucking throw out for kids?
[00:07:15] We're like who gives a shit. I guess we're kids gay though
[00:07:18] Maybe they like having a gay candle opera is the candle opera? No, it's not the candle opera
[00:07:22] It's the guy that's Gaston's friend is a minor carter
[00:07:26] Gaston's like a like the bully guy. Yeah, the candle is French. So he's culturally gay
[00:07:32] Yeah, he's not the same. Yeah, he's literally flaming. Yeah
[00:07:37] There you go, baby, but that just gets us pussy
[00:07:40] The
[00:07:42] Clock funny that clock character in the new movie and like instead of a clock face with numbers on it just says cock
[00:07:49] For each one of the numbers. So it's always time. I remember it always say that's the hiding of penises everywhere
[00:07:54] The 90s. Yeah, it's funny that they got mad that there was a gay character in this movie about a woman fucking an animal
[00:08:05] Is the right of it. It's literally beastie. I want some
[00:08:10] The reality you want gay shit getting thrown in yeah, I like a specific thing and my children like a specific
[00:08:15] Yeah, well anyway, we it's our official stance
[00:08:18] We take full credit for the fact that they made Josh Gads character in the beauty and the beast gay
[00:08:24] Has he beauty in the beastie ality? No one's gay
[00:08:27] Has there ever been I'm sure there's there's got to be like I feel like I've seen it
[00:08:31] But like a meme or like a web comic where one of the beasts servants turns into like a flashlight
[00:08:38] It gets because they're all like an animate objects around the house like one of them had to turn into
[00:08:44] some kind of
[00:08:45] You know, it's a mansion. There's no way a guy with a mansion isn't gonna have a couple but plugs
[00:08:52] Yeah, yeah, or something that he comes on. That's true. Yeah, he's there alone. I mean he's jacking off
[00:08:58] Yeah until Bell shows up until
[00:09:02] Yeah, I've seen there've been a lot of pornos made out of beauty in the beast because it was around before the Disney thing even yeah
[00:09:09] There's some great. I think they handle the story better and a lot of them. Yeah, why?
[00:09:14] Well, there's this one the guy the one guy who was like I guess the Gaston friend
[00:09:19] had a Brooklyn a thick Brooklyn accent
[00:09:23] And he was fucking this the princess. He goes I saw yeah, I saw Prince's getting fucked by a dwarf in the forest this way
[00:09:29] This is better more memorable lines. Yeah, I want to see I was a David Mamet. I think who wrote that
[00:09:39] Every line the way writes it
[00:09:41] Yeah Glenn Harry Glenn Glenn. Yeah, I got not the best cock on that one
[00:09:52] American buff fuck American Buffalo but fuck a low. Yeah sure. Yeah, he's like a buffalo head man
[00:10:00] That's what the beast is. Yeah, I kind of yeah. Oh, yeah, he's like a wildebeast. Yeah
[00:10:05] Yeah, I can feel what kind of beast he was. Yeah, what kind of beast?
[00:10:10] That's a good bit. I was sure I would I would love to be in the beast
[00:10:14] I want to watch a beauty in the beast porn where the dad gets fucked by his weird invention
[00:10:21] That weird car invent like remember the dad's like a shitty inventor. Yeah, he makes like a steampunk car. Yeah
[00:10:27] Steam powered car which he seems like he would be more of a danger to the community than the beast would he definitely had a
[00:10:34] Series of fucking machines in the basement. Mm-hmm. You know just dildos
[00:10:39] Yeah, you know him on a bicycle with a dildo coming in out of his ass. Yeah, I'm sure you know that uh
[00:10:46] The cartoon porn is illegal in Canada cartoon porn. Why I guess if there's like if it looks like there's children in it
[00:10:54] Oh, cuz kids like cartoons
[00:10:56] Well, I don't know about that any I don't know Canada's laws, but I'm assuming that it's basically communist Russia
[00:11:02] How are they enforce that though? I mean they really they don't have like anime with like the tentacles and shit
[00:11:08] Well, the way I found out about it is because a couple years ago way. Yeah, right the literal hard eyes are dry down
[00:11:14] Well a guy went a guy tried to smuggle
[00:11:18] Simpsons porn into Canada and he got caught
[00:11:23] Hey, that's just sounds like a Canadian crime that you'd be doing hard time. Yeah. Yeah, I tried to smuggle Simpsons
[00:11:29] Poor you like well, I love how like, you know the way pedophiles get treated in American prisons like this guy's a fucking chomo
[00:11:35] Let's fuck him up and then in Canadian prison. It's like, you know, hey this guy wants to fuck Bard a
[00:11:41] We should rape this guy that wants to fuck this crab apple
[00:11:47] The only reference I were the only
[00:11:50] Media that I've ever conceived with Canadian prisons in his trailer trailer park boys, and it looks awesome. That's a great show
[00:11:57] It's chill you talk with a show. I've watched it. No, I have been told to watch a lot of times
[00:12:01] Yeah, they love jail. You just smoke weed and just hang out smoke dope hang out play hockey
[00:12:08] Yeah, they're like I hope I don't get out this week because we have the finals. Yeah, they just love jail
[00:12:12] They're like Canadian trailer trash. Yeah, it's incredible. Yeah, what hoses are supposed to be
[00:12:19] Well, the term hoses in Indiana people
[00:12:22] No hoses hoses in Canada take off hoser, and that's like old, you know, that's because they would siphon gas
[00:12:30] Oh, yeah, that's prominently featured in the show
[00:12:33] Yeah, that's a hoser they set up there on they have an episode where they set up their own gas station in the trailer park
[00:12:38] And it's just barrels of gas that they made there like two like lackeys suck out of cars
[00:12:44] And then they get arrested eventually the like the lackeys are in court and they're both like on like chemotherapy
[00:12:53] Because they've sucked too much gas out of cars you ever see the movie motorama
[00:12:58] No, what is that? It's this bizarre movie and I'm I think it was written by the guy that wrote after hours, which is great
[00:13:05] I know that is either. It's it's a Scorsese movie. It's about like a guy goes out on a date
[00:13:11] And then he just says this like weird. No, I thought you were talking about the ambulance
[00:13:15] Who's an after hours? Wait a minute. Maybe I do know that. I don't remember the name of the actor. I know
[00:13:22] Was that posh?
[00:13:23] What's his name to do that wrote taxi driver?
[00:13:26] No, I mean I the only two movies
[00:13:29] I know that he's written her after hours in motorama. I think it's the same guy
[00:13:33] Motorama is this bizarre movie about like it's like a dystopian future
[00:13:37] And there's this like ten-year-old boy that's trying to collect all these it's like McDonald's monopoly all these like cards that spell out
[00:13:43] Motorama
[00:13:44] Yeah, I remember that yeah, and he's got like a Mustang and he's like driving around the desert and shit
[00:13:48] They used to play that and cherry 2000 on TV all the time. Oh, yeah, sure
[00:13:54] Yeah, yeah, yeah who played cherry? I don't remember who played cherry, but it was um oh
[00:14:00] Fuck the the hunter is
[00:14:03] He has to hire a bounty hunt god damn it dude. I'm like I'm brain dead as far as
[00:14:10] Who's it this is embarrassing? Yeah, cuz normally in New York we get all the movie facts, right? That's true. It's a place in your 2000
[00:14:19] No, it should though. I love like the movies that completely got it wrong
[00:14:23] Like they guessed way too early. Yeah, I mean give themselves enough time
[00:14:27] Yeah, but you know, I mean they did get people do fucks ex robots
[00:14:31] That's true creepy dude the way they look now. Do you see those new Japanese ones coming out?
[00:14:37] They got that uncanny valley horror face really almost human, but also horribly not human at the same time
[00:14:44] Oh like a regular Japanese person
[00:14:47] Very similar to an actual Japanese woman. It looks yeah, it looks it's just so grossing as imagine like I
[00:14:55] Mean that's the first use for when they get this perfected is fucking yeah
[00:15:00] I mean it's kind of the unspoken rule of robotics. I was all with this. Yeah. Yeah
[00:15:04] Yeah, well it's sort of like when the 3d printers came out everyone's you know at the mics that week everyone's first
[00:15:10] Observation is like well, they're gonna make a pussy and they're gonna make a gun like this like the first two things you do
[00:15:15] Yeah, and it was true. That's what I did. I thought I'd serve at trying to do that open mic bed at UCB
[00:15:20] No, I went to open mic at UCB and I got like just scribbled out a couple of ideas
[00:15:26] Yeah, and I had I was like talking about 3d printers
[00:15:29] Yeah, and I wasn't familiar with like the culture of UCB at the time
[00:15:33] Yeah, and so like I was doing anything about like yeah
[00:15:36] They got these 3d printers now and like you can print out like a fucking 3d pussy
[00:15:42] Right you can literally if you get a 3d printer you can fuck whenever you want right and they also
[00:15:48] They have you can print a gun with a 3d printer. Yeah, which means you could just print a gun and fuck whenever you want
[00:15:54] It was like a rape joke and it just zero like staring daggers at me
[00:15:59] It's one of the shows where the hosts have another microphone and they're like no
[00:16:03] Yeah, yeah, the fun. I'm like it was just a rape joke. I'm sorry
[00:16:10] But you can't really print a pussy on it. I'm getting hung up on that. Yeah, I print a pussy
[00:16:15] Well, it was a clunky way to get to that my rape joke
[00:16:19] Well worth the time. Yeah
[00:16:21] Yeah
[00:16:23] Yeah, I'm sure you can't print a fucking
[00:16:26] $7,000 degree from from improv clown university
[00:16:31] How much is degree in gender studies cost versus at UCB? Yeah, yeah, it's a comparable
[00:16:38] When you're yeah OT level 5 I think yes when they tell you about Z new
[00:16:44] Find out delclosas
[00:16:46] Who's the Tom Cruise of UCB?
[00:16:50] It's Matt Walsh. I don't know the Tom Cruise
[00:16:55] Yeah, as we've to do to make it an analogous comparison. Oh, you know who it is
[00:17:00] Scientology it's flow from the progressive commercials. That's probably true. She's a UCB person actually
[00:17:07] She went to the same high school as Mr. Lewis Jacob is
[00:17:12] He went to high school of flow. Yeah, he was telling me that he has a big inferiority complex that he wants to be the most
[00:17:19] Famous guy from his high school. What is his high school?
[00:17:21] But but then there's this fucking flow chick and Lewis went to a genius arts high school
[00:17:26] Yeah, millions of great. I don't know where where's he from like some oh shit from like upstate New York
[00:17:35] Yeah, he's from like the I don't know like Rockland. I thought he was from nowhere and everywhere
[00:17:39] Yeah, he's just a road flow went to Puerto Rico high
[00:17:44] Nice for progressive. I still get rattle snakes
[00:17:48] I think a great douchey names to drop this job. I wish I thought of flow for progressive. Yeah, but there's yeah
[00:17:54] There's one like progressive commercial where she's like there's some sort of grid with her playing like 12 different characters
[00:18:02] And it was clear that she was like I have to have one at where I do my characters like I've been yeah
[00:18:08] It was like such a UCB move like shit. Yeah, there's one who was like the clumps where she was like her whole family
[00:18:13] So yeah, I maybe it's that yeah, it was like it was like what they made fun of in that movie with Jack
[00:18:20] What jungle is a tropic thunder when they were making a wrap-up? Yeah, Jack Black
[00:18:26] Fat man Tropic Thunder is like one of the best comedy movies what it give me Justin throw I know it's insane
[00:18:32] It's very weird. Yeah, he wrote that no shit. Yeah, he did isn't that weird. Yeah
[00:18:38] It's also really weird that what's his name?
[00:18:40] Coogans in it for like nothing. Yeah exploded in the beginning. He plays. Oh, yeah
[00:18:45] Yeah, yeah, and then he gets blown up and like right at the beginning. Yeah, but I mean like how
[00:18:50] Well done the blackface shit was in that movie so good and it's like there's a lot of stuff
[00:18:56] I think there's still no award for best blackface
[00:18:59] I think that was probably an Academy Award up until like 1997 wait was Robert
[00:19:04] You're nominated for best support. I think he was nominated for best supporting. Oh really for the blackface
[00:19:09] No, maybe I'm making this up. I don't know we can look at up right now. Yeah
[00:19:14] Yeah, because you can't do blackface in any context
[00:19:17] Like even if you're making fun of blackface. That's kind of funny though. How they I mean it did like
[00:19:23] There was a good fucking joke. Yeah comes out in a wheelchair like let's do this. Mm-hmm. Well, it's like it's
[00:19:29] It's funny because there's a lot of stuff I look at from even five years ago that I'm like you couldn't make this now
[00:19:35] But I feel like Tropic Thunder would get away with it. You think a soul man remake is good. Yeah
[00:19:41] How did soul man? He got he got an Oscar nomination
[00:19:45] 2009 there's your Oscar for blackface. Yeah, yeah, I guess the movie came out 2008. Yeah, I was I was looking at pictures of
[00:19:54] men's bodybuilding competitions the other day and
[00:19:57] And
[00:19:58] They do the spray tanning, you know
[00:20:01] They like spray tan before the competition because of the darker you are like that it brings out the yeah
[00:20:06] this because the light captures or whatever the shadows and shit and
[00:20:11] That's like I don't understand why that's okay, but blackface isn't is to do like black body
[00:20:18] But they're not trying to say that they're black with it
[00:20:21] Yeah, but even if you weren't trying to say that you're black if you just put black man
[00:20:24] The whole problem is you try to say you're trying to say you're black. That's the whole issue. No if you accidentally let's say
[00:20:30] Like you were making stovetop popcorn and there was some kind of horrific accident
[00:20:35] And you just blackened your whole face and you ran out of your apartment
[00:20:38] You're like I need help your career would be over
[00:20:40] That's so sad a lot of like those meth lab explosions that guys are forever in blackface. Yeah. Yeah, this is this
[00:20:47] I'm sorry. This is really funny the second thing that came up when I searched Robert Downey Junior Academy Award blackface
[00:20:54] Was that the next year at the Oscars Billy Crystal was hosting and he faced serious black backlash for going in blackface?
[00:21:02] That's right. He played an old jazz man
[00:21:05] Sammy Davis, dude. Yeah, well no Sammy Davis is a fucking good
[00:21:10] But I'm never doing like a jazz man for like Hurricane Katrina. Mm-hmm. That was insane. Yeah
[00:21:17] I have a damn a doo-ba-dabbo. Well, he actually played Kanye in that video with Mike Myers. Oh, yeah
[00:21:23] Yeah, it was actually just Billy Crystal. Billy Chris was like a blackface
[00:21:28] George Bosh doesn't care about us
[00:21:34] Lord yeah, I was the Billy Chris L'Kami special with like Christopher Guest is in it and he plays of Sammy Davis
[00:21:41] And he doesn't really great. Oh really he looks like I'm any fucking sounds exactly like him. I
[00:21:47] Think we need to move beyond being offended by blackface folks. Yeah, well, that's why I voted for Trump. Yeah
[00:21:55] It's gonna you know, you see there was like I don't know if it was real or not
[00:21:59] But people were tweeting a screen cap from like a white house email today that said that Trump declares
[00:22:06] April
[00:22:08] National sexual assault awareness, but if you go to whiteouts.gov
[00:22:12] There's no mention of it
[00:22:13] So I'm thinking it's a hoax and I'm thinking like how fucking funny would it be if Sean Spicer has to clarify and say no
[00:22:20] It's not sexual assault awareness month. Why is that guy like that the way his fuck the way he fucking delivers a line?
[00:22:27] Yeah, I was so I saw what's your name doing the impression of him first?
[00:22:31] Dorothy. Yeah. Yeah, and then when I saw him like oh my god
[00:22:35] I think because every time he goes out before the press he's literally been yelled at for 40 minutes by the president of the United States
[00:22:43] Yeah, he's all pinchy face. Yeah. Yeah, you said that mm-hmm. He looks like he's just been crying a lot of this
[00:22:49] Well, you know, he was the Easter bunny in the bush
[00:22:53] He was the official Easter bunny of the White House. That was his last White House job
[00:22:58] Was he would dress up like the Easter bunny? That's all he did was that?
[00:23:02] Yeah, I don't think he didn't he wasn't involved in that administration beyond that
[00:23:06] I'm not checking that at all, but that's what I choose to yeah
[00:23:09] Interpret from the city like how an Easter bunny would be to me. Yeah
[00:23:14] Well, hopefully they send him out in the Easter Bunny costume to explain that it is officially not sexual assault awareness month
[00:23:21] Donald Trump can't stress enough that you shouldn't be aware of sexual assault
[00:23:25] Shouldn't every month be that yeah, I got in a big argument
[00:23:28] I went to Mexico with some friends a few weeks ago for a bachelor party
[00:23:32] I got a big argument with my friend about came on her like a bitch
[00:23:36] What's right?
[00:23:37] On her like a bit so you know the grabber by the pussy recording right so my like
[00:23:43] Grabber by the pussy became like the
[00:23:45] That was the jam that was the pull quote, you know, that was the hit right yeah, but I thought that
[00:23:51] He said I came on her like a bitch like he like approached her
[00:23:55] So I got a big argument on to her I came on to her like a bitch
[00:24:00] What does that doesn't make any it doesn't make any sense so I got in an argument with my friend where?
[00:24:07] Clearly to me he's saying like she's a bitch, right? Yeah, but my friend was of the opinion that he was calling himself a bitch
[00:24:16] Which doesn't really think that it's why would he ever call himself a bitch
[00:24:20] I've made the point on the show before but I really like if you listen to that whole tape
[00:24:25] It sounds like Trump has no fucking idea what he's talking about no, it's not trying to sound cool
[00:24:32] 40-year-old
[00:24:37] I can't imagine a situation where he hasn't like every situation where he fucks a woman
[00:24:43] I imagine it like a debut taunt ball where he comes down the stairs with his penis out and then the woman that they've sex traffic
[00:24:50] It's right yeah, basically. I just like I thought like oh, he doesn't even know what sex is like
[00:24:56] He's just been fucking their navel this old. Yeah. Yeah. He has no idea. Oh, of course
[00:25:00] Yeah, no one would tell him that he's not doing it the wrong way. Yeah. Yeah, of course, then you rub but
[00:25:06] Yeah, yeah, I came she came everybody came it was terrific. Yeah, I rub butts with beautiful women every day
[00:25:13] Yeah, yeah, he's like those women that like like I didn't have an orgasm until I was 35 years old
[00:25:19] He's gonna have like an awakening
[00:25:21] I got a shot to massage and I had no idea. I thought it was just peeing the whole time
[00:25:26] Yeah, you remember I you know I didn't realize until adulthood, but like I mean you this might be I don't know
[00:25:33] This is probably you might be just too old for this
[00:25:35] But Brookstone always had a rule like workstone in the mall where like you couldn't be you Adam you know about this you couldn't be
[00:25:42] Under 18 and to use the massage share why they say all it'll stunt your growth
[00:25:49] But all the everything that they say all it'll stunt your growth. It just means like a child might accidentally come
[00:25:55] How could it start your growth it is impossible? Yeah, but that's what they would tell you
[00:26:00] They didn't want kids sitting in the massage share because it might make them come it would
[00:26:04] Maybe but okay kids don't really come do they?
[00:26:08] I'm a few best in no did you use to jerk off before yeah, I started jacking off when I was like yeah, I
[00:26:15] Started yeah, I started jerking off before I can come and you came or no
[00:26:20] It's you but you have a way more intense orgasm. Yeah, then there's actually a completion then actually coming
[00:26:27] Yeah, but this is what my love is talking about exactly. Yeah, you know I
[00:26:32] Never even occurred to me. Do that. Yeah
[00:26:34] Yeah, I was a I was a late bloomer. So a lot of my friends were
[00:26:38] We're blasting on your face. No my face. Yeah, you believe it. Yeah, yeah, right? That was determined. No, let's get the late bloomer
[00:26:48] Let's show him what a fucking underdeveloped flower. He is oh god. Yeah, tell me about it
[00:26:55] Boys about to be 30 this weekend when I was in when I was in junior high
[00:26:58] My friend told this retarded kid that if you have hair on around your dick
[00:27:02] It means you have leprosy and you're gonna die. Oh wow and the retarded kid was like
[00:27:07] No, it doesn't
[00:27:09] Like it's normal. It's not it's not a problem
[00:27:13] And he was just bullying this retarded kid for having cubes who was doing this this kid
[00:27:18] I knew it does one of your UCB characters. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm the guy that police retarded kid about
[00:27:25] This is my SNL video. Yeah
[00:27:28] There hasn't been a rape controversy in a while. I don't think well give it time. Yeah
[00:27:34] Well, there was Jamie kill scene. Oh, right the kill scene thing and then next one's Matt McGory
[00:27:40] You know, it's any day now that his victims are gonna crawl out of the shadows
[00:27:44] Mm-hmm gory's an actor from orange is the new black. Yeah. Yeah, but he's like determined to become
[00:27:51] The biggest woke guy was to work well
[00:27:55] He tweets weird shit like didn't he have that one where he's reading that like feminist book and he's like
[00:28:00] I'm gonna jack off to this or something. He was like no, but he was like intimating that he was like
[00:28:05] Like that there was a sexual element. I mean he gets he gets pretty fucking close to being like it's hot when women are feminist
[00:28:13] Oh, he's I barely pay attention. He's done some unspeakable things. Let's be honest. Yeah, it's it's only a matter of time
[00:28:20] Hit no the thing that I remember is that him and his dad got
[00:28:25] matching female reproductive system tattoos on their arms
[00:28:30] Because he makes more money than his dad and he's life. I guess so yeah, I guess so you know as a sweet life
[00:28:37] Justin Bieber's dad Justin Bieber's dad rules. Yeah, I wish he was my dad. Yeah, he rules
[00:28:44] He's just trying to hang yeah. Yeah, he's a fun. He's a funny
[00:28:48] He's like he's like sort of Canadian white trash. It's like a monster energy kind of dude
[00:28:54] That should have been yeah, that should have been a plot on on on trailer park boys
[00:28:59] Ricky should have had a son that that was a virtue. Yeah, like an internet sensation and then usher gave him a career
[00:29:06] Oh, dude. I look at this thing of Matt McGorry talking about the power dynamics of his on-screen relationship
[00:29:13] I think that was not cool. Do you think about his kid? He's like scolding his character?
[00:29:18] Perf having a fair like you just watch a show you fucking yeah
[00:29:23] I love that people are you see this controversy with the the think's underwear company? No
[00:29:30] Yeah, it's like it's they marketed themselves as like a feminist underwear company
[00:29:35] I saw that it's underwear that you can just have your period directly into it. They've had some subway. Yeah, what do you call it?
[00:29:40] They're called thinks because they make you smarter. I don't know explain this to me again
[00:29:46] I'm sorry
[00:29:47] It was a this company is like under a lot of fire
[00:29:50] There's like it's this underwear company called things and they look a female CEO and they branded themselves as like a feminist
[00:29:57] company and
[00:29:58] They made underwear that you could just have your period directly into which I guess has some application for like
[00:30:05] People that can't get access to tampons or whatever like maybe I heard of people using fucking diva cups and shit
[00:30:13] Yeah, that's another option
[00:30:14] I mean I guess there if if you're like prone to like you can get like toxic toxic plasmosis and shit from tampon
[00:30:20] So it is like a cool that they invented something like yeah, I mean it's one of them things
[00:30:25] I'm like I don't have an opinion about your fucking you know, you know, put it down. I got no opinions
[00:30:30] Well, I mean I take it from the like if I
[00:30:33] Oh look three nights out of the week. I go to bed without brushing my teeth
[00:30:37] You know, I shave my face once a week
[00:30:41] If I had to deal with like blood leaking out of my dick once a month. I that would be you don't
[00:30:51] Then it would be like
[00:30:53] That I would be annoyed that I had to do anything about it
[00:30:56] But this is the thing because there's so many but you know
[00:30:59] I haven't I I will say I heard a million to say this before like only came comic talk about a period
[00:31:05] That fucking like for sure. Yeah comics. Yeah. Yeah, so I mean I know there's somebody who's like oh
[00:31:11] Like but I it's like I don't care. It's I hate when somebody is bravely. Yeah, right a diva cup
[00:31:17] Literally a cunt cup. Yeah, there's what they mean by that. Well, my problem isn't with the underwear
[00:31:22] I mean I don't give a shit about the controversy with the controversy is that to see the female CEO was like sexually harassing or
[00:31:28] Subordinates and like telling them like sex
[00:31:32] Yeah, and she was just this like Don Draper piece of shit and like
[00:31:37] like giving people like two weeks for maternity leave and
[00:31:40] Fucking like, you know, just a scumbat like any other CEO
[00:31:46] Any company that has any initiative or anything. Yeah, he's repulsive. Yeah
[00:31:51] Well, like there's no need to take a stand here. God damn corporation. You got nothing to do with this. Yeah
[00:31:59] That's how I feel well, yeah, I mean I that's why corporations should just be evil, you know like Monsanto
[00:32:06] Mm-hmm. That's why I'm on the same as a fucker. You that told me that the hells angels are really into eating girls out while they have
[00:32:13] Yeah, period's well there are in the eating all kinds of pussy. Have you ever seen the chart of like different wings?
[00:32:19] You can get yeah, yeah, yeah the green wing the cribs and wings
[00:32:23] Yeah, well the crimson wings is for you. Oh, I want to see on her. Yeah yellow wings china most of them are race-based
[00:32:29] That's there's what's green. It's that one is if she has like an infection. I might be fucking it out
[00:32:35] But there's the there's a green one and there's a purple one and one of them is like if she's dead
[00:32:41] Which is that's pretty intense to eat a girl's pussy
[00:32:44] Which I what is the point of what it's if she's dead
[00:32:49] I saw a chart one time with all of them on there where on the internet
[00:32:54] You know at that when I was using the computer at the house angels motor side. I was I was in the East Village
[00:33:00] I was in the East Village a few weeks ago. Yeah by a patty mojo
[00:33:05] And I was walking down the street some fucking Hills angel guy comes out of like I guess they have a clubhouse down
[00:33:11] Oh, yeah, they do yeah, you haven't seen it and he like comes out and he like is like you fucking spit here, bro
[00:33:17] I was like, I didn't fucking spit. I was like on the phone
[00:33:21] He's like he's like, I'll fuck a kick your ass if I find out you were spitting
[00:33:27] What just like all right from the singapore chapter of the hell's a yeah, I guess so he would have came
[00:33:33] Are you fucking blast-fuming out here?
[00:33:35] Did you use the Lord's name in vain bro, dude? I had like woke sing a breeze like spit somewhere visible that
[00:33:42] Maybe he saw someone on some sort of security camera spit. I didn't fuck a spit
[00:33:49] Oh, you were maybe you were outside the club. I was outside the club on the phone
[00:33:53] Oh, oh, so you were in front of their motor. I was in front of their motorcycle club. Yeah, and he's any thought I was spitting
[00:34:00] Oh, and I was like this is still a thing
[00:34:02] Well, I'm kind of upset you didn't get beat up by bikers. It would have been cool if I got
[00:34:07] I have a I'm a getting beat up by bikers story that happened to me the sugar
[00:34:11] I don't know like Jim not hell's angels so lower tier bikers law biting
[00:34:17] 99% or yeah, right outside of like you know beating people up outside of comedy shows
[00:34:23] Why they beat you up because I was making fun of sugar ray the band sugar ray
[00:34:27] Well, okay mark regret elaborate on that I was saying like, you know, we were me and my friend
[00:34:32] We're making fun of sugar ray one of the bikers comes over. He's like, oh, you know sugar is actually badass, dude
[00:34:38] If I like mark regret that dudes a fucking badass and I'm like no
[00:34:42] He's not you know and he goes why saw a video where someone said sugar gay and then he like threatened to kill the guy
[00:34:48] I'm like yeah, that makes him like a fucking insecure piece
[00:34:51] Mark McGrath I've heard him talk about sugar rays like yeah, it's a piece of shit like yeah
[00:34:58] He's like I don't I didn't have a job. I'm fuck this. Yeah, he doesn't like any of the music. Oh, that's cool
[00:35:05] Entertainment reporter mark McGrath from the e-channel
[00:35:09] Yeah, he's like a fucking entertainment tonight kind of be great if I was talking shit on the e-channel
[00:35:14] It's what set off the bikers, dude. You don't like fucking
[00:35:17] Fander Plumb probably badass channel
[00:35:22] Yo, dude say that again about the lifetime movie channel GG. How do you fuck you up?
[00:35:29] It's so weird as you did a you did a set after you did gotta beat up by like coming out of my mouth
[00:35:36] I went in and did a fun a fun after you actually did get your ass kicked by Mark
[00:35:41] This mark of a graphic is fancy on badass right now. Yeah, that's that's badass, dude
[00:35:46] Um
[00:35:47] Okay, all right fair point
[00:35:52] The whole time he was he was throwing punches and he was like, I just want to fly
[00:36:08] That like they'll kick you yeah, I got street I got cat called the other night
[00:36:12] By some some hoodlum by like a thug. Yeah, some dog hood guy
[00:36:19] Yeah, gangster fag from Rogan. No, no, you know, yeah, but he had it. He was called gangster fags a rapper. What was he from?
[00:36:28] Las Vegas really yeah, Joe Rogan got a tape and they were playing it on uh, there's YouTube Patrice listen to to it with them
[00:36:35] But it produces cracking up because it's like it's hitting mid-westerners in their deepest fears like he's gay and he's fucking
[00:36:43] Gangster. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he's your son home
[00:36:47] Well, that's kind of the final level of masculinity. I mean, that's why that shit so prevalent in jail and gay
[00:36:52] Yeah, right is to be a prison rapist. There's nothing more masculine than just butt sex
[00:36:58] Yeah, um, well not that it's at you like well fine. You're a pussy now. Yeah, honey pussy. Well, I guess you're gonna have to be pussy
[00:37:05] Yeah, yeah, not getting pussy. That's pretty much what it is
[00:37:08] I found a YouTube video a couple years ago and they got deleted it since I showed it to cubist back when we were living together
[00:37:14] And I forget how I found it, but it's just like kind of like heavy said black dude
[00:37:18] And he's like doing a vlog and he's like um, I just got out of jail
[00:37:22] I was in jail for the last like, you know eight months or whatever and county's like this is a story
[00:37:27] You know, this is a jail story
[00:37:29] I don't know if it was real or not, but it's made it sound pretty fucking convincing and he's like uh
[00:37:33] Yeah, and so I was uh, you know, I was in county lock up and it's like this white boy came in and you know, uh
[00:37:40] You know, he was kind of pretty or whatever
[00:37:42] So I caught him in the shower one day and you know, I I reached around I grabbed his penis and it was cute
[00:37:48] You know, he had like a cute penis or whatever and uh, you know, he didn't really feel comfortable with that
[00:37:53] But maybe about a week later. He was I saw him sleeping on his bunk
[00:37:57] But he was sleeping on his side. So what we do I got a razor blade
[00:38:01] And I slit down the back of his his boxes
[00:38:04] So you can peek at the booty hole and I would you know, I would just take peek set it while he was sleeping and then two weeks later
[00:38:10] I raped him and wow
[00:38:13] And he goes and that guy well his name was uh tom
[00:38:17] Henderson that's what I raped. Uh, I raped his white boy tom Henderson and he's like just taller than story on
[00:38:24] Yeah, yeah, and I mean I guess we got deleted or something, but it was fucking
[00:38:28] You know, yeah, yeah, yeah
[00:38:34] Oh my god, yeah
[00:38:37] Shit goddamn. Yeah, I know where he says you have a cute little penis. Yeah, that's a little extra. Yeah, I know
[00:38:43] Imagine getting out of jail to find out you're a youtube star
[00:38:49] YouTube star tom tom wow that's fucking the notch a lot that I saw one like that where it was a guy
[00:38:55] It was like a white guy was in the crips. Mm-hmm. Uh-huh. Um and they and these other two black guys are crips
[00:39:02] Like well, whatever he's a crips were accepting him
[00:39:04] But then like I don't know where the white guy was from what's what shitty m&m part of you know, the midwest
[00:39:10] But he put he drew something satanic
[00:39:13] On the wall or something something idiotic and then they couldn't watch basketball the whole the whole level because this guy's fucking satanic drawing
[00:39:20] Yeah, so they're all mad
[00:39:22] And these guys knew he this dude head wrote put the shit up
[00:39:27] So he was like you let us fuck you because they didn't like him the whole time. Yeah, I think I saw this there were bloods not crips
[00:39:33] Lides ex policies of the crips. Yeah. Yeah
[00:39:37] Yeah, we wouldn't want to but smurch them on race or slash com no
[00:39:41] I learned how to do a crip walk very very deeply still. I think the bloods have their own dance
[00:39:47] They do the blood balance. Yeah, which is the same thing is they're very similar dance
[00:39:51] Yeah, yeah, which is weird because you think that would be the best way to keep white people out of your gang is by having a special dance
[00:39:59] Yeah, but then but that guy
[00:40:01] Still managed to learn it and get in the gang and bring all of his dumb fucking Judas priest iconography and ruin the basketball game for everybody
[00:40:11] I mean, that's like I don't think prison rape is right. But if you
[00:40:15] Well, the interview the guy you got raped was like, I think it's fine, you know, my girlfriend does know
[00:40:20] Why are you being interviewed about it? Yeah, because I was in that documentary turned out
[00:40:25] That's what it was. Yeah. Yeah, when they were rated by Danny Trejo. Oh damn
[00:40:29] Which when he was still like kind of figuring out what kind of post career he wanted to have yeah lift driver
[00:40:36] Was talking to stop like about places to go in LA
[00:40:39] He's like yeah
[00:40:40] You got to go to the top of the there's a building in downtown that they have a slide on the side of the building
[00:40:45] And stops like adam you trying to do this like I don't like no. I don't want to go to a slide slide
[00:40:51] Yeah, it's like really high up and he's like yeah
[00:40:53] You also got to get like a burrito or a taco at Danny Trejo's place that was like one of the
[00:40:59] It's sounds like adam you trying to get a daddy trejo. I was like this is bad advice
[00:41:04] He's not telling us anything good to do. Mm-hmm. This guy is clearly not, you know, whatever
[00:41:10] But it's funny that he told us to get Danny Trejo tacos
[00:41:13] Maybe they're good dicks out for her armbay fame. Yeah
[00:41:18] He's got a cool backstory. You know about trejo. What is it? Did he rape a white point named Johnny Henderson?
[00:41:22] He did yeah, tom handerson and then that's uh, that's the plot of uh machete too
[00:41:29] Um no he like uh, you know, he was like a criminal or whatever
[00:41:33] But he used to have like rob convenience stores with a fucking grenade
[00:41:37] Oh, yeah, I heard this. Yeah. Yeah
[00:41:39] Yeah
[00:41:41] How long did he get away with that?
[00:41:43] He was in prison for a long fucking time
[00:41:45] He was actually like the like some I don't know like middleweight or uh, uh, uh, like
[00:41:51] Like saying quinton like boxing champion. Oh, okay. Yeah
[00:41:55] Uh
[00:41:56] So I mean, you know
[00:41:58] He didn't have an acting career until he got out
[00:42:01] He was in prison with uh eddy bunker from reservoir dogs
[00:42:06] Which one is eddy bunker again eddy bunker is like mr.
[00:42:10] White maybe the guy that's hardly can't tell it's mr.
[00:42:14] Not mr. Brown. It's mr. Like blue or some shit. Yeah. Yeah. He's he's I know he's talking about you know
[00:42:20] mustache. Yeah mustache. Yeah
[00:42:22] That's the mr. blues if you eat a girl out with hypothermia. Yeah. Yeah, uh, that's how you got the name
[00:42:27] That's what all the name that's a
[00:42:30] Uh, I don't know but he his story is nuts because he
[00:42:33] Um like back in the day back when he was like an la criminal
[00:42:38] You know in like the fucking 60s or whatever his thing was he would like design robberies
[00:42:43] Oh, I don't and then sell the robberies like the plans
[00:42:47] With the problem. Yeah, I guess I mean enough. I don't know what he actually went to get the fuck out of here
[00:42:53] Really? Oh, yeah, isn't that cool? That's a fuck. Oh, I talked to uh, steve bishami about uh, reservoir dogs
[00:43:00] because uh chris pen
[00:43:02] Is it chris pen? rip. Yeah, yeah, the better of the two
[00:43:06] Yeah, chris pen was like mean to him because he was like getting into character because gank's okay
[00:43:11] Because don't like each other
[00:43:12] So he'd be like really like mean to my and he said like after it was over and by the way steve
[00:43:17] Bishami didn't know he didn't tell him this until after he had already been bullied
[00:43:21] Because I think it's I know you know because I like Joe but now it can be cool
[00:43:25] And he's like and then when he was nice to me it was worse than when he was mean
[00:43:28] Yeah
[00:43:32] Yeah, there's uh the movie uh king of comedy
[00:43:36] Yeah, of course. Um, so like I love that movie. Just so good. Santa bernhardt's finest work. Yeah
[00:43:42] She's insane. I remember I read that uh
[00:43:46] That fucking uh jerry luis like you know because
[00:43:50] uh
[00:43:52] De Niro was like a serious method actor and score says he took his shit real seriously
[00:43:58] To get jerry luis to be angry enough in the role right they were just like calling him kike and stuff
[00:44:05] Really? I hate his back pills
[00:44:07] Did does he have back problems? Yeah, he was like a opiate the height of his backfill addictions when he made the d the clam cried
[00:44:13] Really? I don't realize it was that what you don't really shit
[00:44:16] I know yeah, yeah, I talked about it because patin owns it
[00:44:20] I guess pat and oswalt oh really because it there
[00:44:23] I thought like he said he would never release it and then like this year he said library congress just got a copy and they're gonna release it in like
[00:44:30] 10 years or something the library congress is like I am counting the days because those seeing them act that that
[00:44:38] Movie out is unbelievable. I mean
[00:44:40] What an unbelievably stupid story. I just I can't imagine any way I wouldn't be disappointed by it
[00:44:45] It's like how people fucking recommend the room to me all the time and I've never seen it
[00:44:49] It's so fucking hysterical. Do I used to oh when uh ugly americans came out
[00:44:53] They had me to a promo where I introduced the room and his theater and the guy uh george
[00:45:00] Fucking wants his last name. I just want to say george glass, but it's george gross
[00:45:05] He he contacted tommy and got tommy to bring i'm friends with the with the guy who plays uh oh high mark
[00:45:10] Yeah, yeah, because I think they're making that movie out of his out of mark. Yeah out of uh Greg's is sterile
[00:45:16] Yes, the sterile lives out here
[00:45:17] So he's a really cool guy and the guy who gets his dick sucked on the couch
[00:45:21] That's like that crazy. That dude doesn't like tommy at all, but we made a fake room
[00:45:27] Like we made this fake like preview that we got the the bad guy christ from the wire like the
[00:45:32] Him to be the money denny guy chris are
[00:45:36] We got yeah, and then we got uh
[00:45:38] Harrison greenbound to be denny
[00:45:41] And jay was the girl lisa and I was uh him. I was uh fucking tommy. Yeah, I was
[00:45:47] Incredible and uh it really looked like fucking
[00:45:51] It was called room part two the room because yeah
[00:45:54] And we've and we had to sneak tommy out of the theater
[00:45:58] I karen and my friend here could jesse dress up like whores and distract him because he would have flipped out if he had seen that
[00:46:03] We made this parody with people from the room, but the sterile wouldn't be in it because he was still tight with him
[00:46:08] He's like, yeah, I'll be so upset. I just can't well never guys come out right
[00:46:12] The disaster artist james traco. Yeah, so starry's books really interesting if you watch it. I hear it's like laugh out loud funny
[00:46:19] Like I don't know the laugh. No the book like I don't often laugh from books. Oh, yeah
[00:46:24] He's never met a person like this guy in his life. Yeah, yeah, um
[00:46:28] It but but tommy was always like not he doesn't disappoint like he's not he's exactly
[00:46:34] What the fuck you think he is from the movies?
[00:46:36] A maniac so my friend got the well actually he got it advanced, but now it's on hulu the neighbors
[00:46:43] Which was his follow-up to yeah, george showed me that that was his sitcom. It is a nightmare
[00:46:48] It's a nightmare george sent him five letters to get him to bring the room. Okay
[00:46:53] Uh because he wanted to show it in new york t's NYU kids. Mm-hmm
[00:46:57] And it was like a big thing
[00:46:58] It was awesome to see it
[00:46:59] They had a band that played when they'd go over the bridge in the beginning. Oh shit
[00:47:03] Because I went I didn't want to go I was like yeah, and it was almost like rocky horror picture shell kind of shit of like
[00:47:09] Interactive night, but it was funny. It was fun, but then it was like the room's pretty much over. It was like yeah
[00:47:13] What says is they I can't participate in shit. It's just like I did
[00:47:17] Fuck yeah, I swear to god. I got so into it
[00:47:20] There's a scene where mark if mark has a beard the whole movie and then he just shows up without a yeah with no beard
[00:47:27] And people grow their beards out and then go to the bathroom and shave their beards like come back
[00:47:32] I can't imagine a universe in which I would enjoy
[00:47:35] Participating I couldn't either but I saw it. It's like the best because it's never boring. It's like when easy make a movie
[00:47:41] That's not boring. It's yeah, I mean eat I guess the sex scenes maybe get a little get a little intense
[00:47:48] There's so great that he insists on his ass
[00:47:52] He like we see know the mind behind making this movie. It's just it's so fascinating
[00:47:58] Oh, yeah, the propaganda about himself. He wrote into this movie. Oh, yeah
[00:48:02] I mean, I'm I want to watch it again because I haven't seen it so yeah, it's it uh it ruined my ability to evaluate art
[00:48:10] there's a um
[00:48:12] We were like we were at work. We were briefly like there was like talk of doing like a
[00:48:18] Like something on hacking so we were going through the Sony emails
[00:48:21] And I found this email that someone sent to Amy Pascal at the head of Sony. Yeah, it's like he's like this is my screenplay
[00:48:29] You know, um like I hope you like it. I'm trying to get this made into a movie
[00:48:34] You know, so it's a crazy person sending it. Yeah, and the screenplay is called
[00:48:38] Oh fuck. It's like uh the only man left on earth
[00:48:43] And the plot is like an astronaut. There's a virus that wipes out all men
[00:48:47] Except for one astronaut who was in space when the virus happens and then he comes back and
[00:48:52] He's irresistible to the women
[00:48:55] And they can't like you know, he couldn't get a date before the virus happened, but now he's
[00:48:59] uh having to beat off
[00:49:01] Tens and nines left and right and I fucking I like I read the you it's all scrambled because the email
[00:49:08] It's a formatted fucked up. Yeah, but I read some of it. I emailed the guy and I'm like, can I please have the full script?
[00:49:13] I read some of it and it's fucking amazing. Yeah, and he was like, yeah, I'll get he's like I'm out of town
[00:49:18] But I'll get it to you. So I'm waiting on on that screenplay dude
[00:49:22] I can't wait. Yeah, I used to like but I'm sure I would get bored with that within like the first 20 minutes
[00:49:28] I'd say in fact, I'm already bored now that I've told other people about it
[00:49:31] That's amazing man. That's like I've often dreamed of that happening
[00:49:35] You know what being the actual is all the men. Yeah, well
[00:49:39] What's funny is like it seems like the dumb is bullshit in the world, but it's also like that would be a successful movie
[00:49:46] Yeah, why like why why wouldn't that fucking work?
[00:49:49] Yeah, the movies were the guy because that's what Tommy was those that the movies like
[00:49:53] He's such a great guy constantly betrayed by those. He loves. Oh, yeah, exactly
[00:49:57] And his beautiful younger friend mark who's so much younger and more beautiful than him
[00:50:02] And he's obsessed like he thinks like 20 something is like the perfect age
[00:50:07] But it's in the book about his weird youth obsession
[00:50:10] Um, and then what's the fucking line that he couldn't get right? You're taking me apart. Lisa. You're tearing me apart
[00:50:15] Lisa saying taking me apart. Yeah
[00:50:18] And um the dude and we had a thing like that where I kept saying taking me apart
[00:50:22] Oh, the guy gets gets the blowjob told me well, I'm seeing they go
[00:50:26] He couldn't say tearing me apart like it took forever because he kept saying you're taking me apart
[00:50:30] And he said just to watch a mean man melt down so much like he hates him
[00:50:35] Yeah, what the fuck is that guy's name the one who's lost his i've heard me
[00:50:39] Because I lost me underwears
[00:50:40] He's just in it for two scenes and then sort of disappears into the fabric of the universe
[00:50:46] Well, he was in our preview. He hated timing
[00:50:48] Greg likes him still
[00:50:50] I because Tommy is like in one of those you could tell if you were his friend like
[00:50:55] And and Greg beat would tell us she's like oh yeah, Tom says he got a lot of stuff to tell me tonight finally
[00:50:59] Yeah, like he would tell him secret parts of his personal history and shit
[00:51:03] Yeah
[00:51:04] Like it would be like big revelations because you my theory was he was immortal like he had an indeterminate accent and like that highlander
[00:51:11] And he was old but like weirdly musculate
[00:51:14] Well when phil was working
[00:51:16] Uh like summer internship when we were in college and like for a management company
[00:51:21] He told us we were obsessed with the room and he told his boss like what if we like sell
[00:51:25] We knew that Tommy Tommy was so said he had a television show but no one had seen it
[00:51:31] And he's like well, let's sell it to adult swim or something like that. It's really bad
[00:51:35] Um, but he had a voicemail on his old cell phone from tommy. Oh, they go forever
[00:51:41] Which we coveted and then he fucking lost i'm like so it's one of the
[00:51:46] One of the things i'm like most upset about yeah, they go on forever
[00:51:50] He was four different phone numbers to like reach i had i had an old flip phone and the only like one of the four things i had
[00:51:57] On it was a picture of
[00:51:59] When i worked at game stop my boss had shit his pants at work one day and i took a picture of the back of his pants with shit all over
[00:52:06] And i like i just couldn't save the picture because when i transferred phones
[00:52:10] Oh, what a disaster how do you come now?
[00:52:14] Uh don't don't anymore to memories i guess i haven't come
[00:52:18] Yeah, yeah, why stop i stopped coming once i hit puberty i just
[00:52:24] Beat off i have benjamin button prostate it's called
[00:52:29] That's what i call my penis my ball breeze and puberty
[00:52:34] Hey, how long do we go because i gotta get here man. Yeah another three man. I mean we could cut it off now
[00:52:38] You have another three minutes. Yeah, that's i have to go to
[00:52:41] San Monica my cousin lives there and i haven't seen him this whole time been in LA
[00:52:46] They just take me to the airport tomorrow you've got to come so yeah, you gotta fuck your cousin
[00:52:51] I gotta go fuck my cousin. I haven't fucked my cousin forever. Yeah. Yeah, all right. Well, uh, yeah
[00:52:57] Well, yeah, we could i mean oh i gotta try to get Greg on race wars man
[00:53:03] I'm glad you're mind to me i kept when the movie comes out i'll get him great sister come on come town
[00:53:08] Yeah, uh, he's a fucking coolest guy man. He really is nice dude. Is he cool? I like him a lot. Yeah
[00:53:13] That movie is gonna be good. I hear it like people are people are happy
[00:53:17] I sure think i'll play because frank almost kind of when he gets old is gonna be that he's gonna be tommy
[00:53:23] I think tommy got raped by cops and like fucking bulgari or something
[00:53:27] Is that where he acts on?
[00:53:28] He won't say where he's from does he have a cop accent?
[00:53:30] No, he he won't say where he's from he'll only say that he is an american now
[00:53:34] Yeah, is he talks like that because he clenches his ass with every word where's van namfra?
[00:53:39] No, jim mussel brussels mussel from brussels there's brussels in belgium. You know how he made his fortune?
[00:53:47] tommy what the cheesecake place importing
[00:53:51] Fancy dresses i thought well he owns that cheesecake place where they're always eating
[00:53:56] That's his place. Yeah, he owns that place
[00:54:00] Nick you should watch the room i know i'm making all this i've shown you the making of the movie
[00:54:04] So they have all these balcony scenes, okay, which a great view of simps. Just go there's all blue screen
[00:54:09] Yeah, they then put up blue screens because he's like i don't want this she i should watch the movie
[00:54:14] Only so i have something to talk about on podcast in the last 20 minutes
[00:54:18] They shot the movie just started formats for no apparent reason
[00:54:21] where the two formats like uh
[00:54:24] fuck
[00:54:25] Magic eye and it's like somewhere you like no one he's gonna do something never done before
[00:54:29] They're like no, but just technically there would be no reason to do this
[00:54:31] Yeah, um and then he also fucking uh
[00:54:35] It's it's kind of my dream to be him though
[00:54:37] I want to just be exploited for being a fucking moron and then just check out
[00:54:41] No, you see that's where you're wrong. He's not like the guy from windy city heat who's like a
[00:54:46] Kind of more of a victim. Yeah, like that was more of an la meanness thing
[00:54:50] Even if it was kind of yeah, but that guy isn't idiot, but
[00:54:54] Well, there's always a meanness everything is is the master here. He's not like it's it's outside her art
[00:55:00] It's like there's this band the shags
[00:55:03] Yeah, where these three girls that grew up in the woods in like new hamster
[00:55:06] And like I think their dad was like the head of a christian cult
[00:55:09] But he gave them instruments gave them like guitars and bass and drums
[00:55:14] But they like were so isolated from society. They just like invented their own music
[00:55:19] It's like insane. No, it's bad. I mean, but it's like sort of interesting and it's maybe at points kind of good
[00:55:24] They're called the shags the shags they had to invent their own music like that twin language jody foster
[00:55:29] Oh, yeah, yeah, like on some they're complete outside. I mean, they're they're like isolated from
[00:55:34] Influence and I think Tommy's like that. I think he's such a he's such a psychopath. I mean he's he's well
[00:55:40] Yeah, it's such a nice but he's influenced by everything and that's like you could tell he also
[00:55:46] The green screen does my fair point. They already have this view they put up these giant blue screens
[00:55:51] And then put the same view that they have
[00:55:53] Without the blue screens and they show you're putting up. You're like, why are you doing that?
[00:55:57] Yeah, I mean you watch it. It looks really fake and not as good as if you just did but he's like it's not gonna look fucking cheap
[00:56:03] So he fucking spent extra money to make it look cheaper because he was that crazy. Yeah, well, I don't buy that it's like
[00:56:10] It there is like a laughing at an idiot aspect there. Oh, it's not as cruel, but I mean, that's no hold on
[00:56:17] Which I don't have a problem with by the way, you understand it was never meant to be a comedy like yeah
[00:56:21] He said it was Tennessee Williams. He said he fancied himself the new Tennessee Williams. Yeah, that's the crazy thing about the neighbors
[00:56:28] David's that is so I see how you get this damn cross happen to see the billboard
[00:56:33] It's like that because he paid for this billboard. That's very expensive like on sunset or something
[00:56:37] He saw it and it was he couldn't believe he ever saw anything like it. I mean you see it you'll get it
[00:56:42] The actual guys are like a kind of a prick, but they all it's funny man
[00:56:46] He's such a fucking weirdo. He it's like he deserves it and also he got richer from it
[00:56:52] But once he realized people were laughing at it
[00:56:54] He then was like oh it was a comedy the whole time then he marketed as a dark comedy
[00:56:59] So if you see the preview once he found out it was fun
[00:57:01] It's like a best friend betrayed all this at the end they oh it's a comedy
[00:57:07] I do the same thing with comedy where I try to be funny and then people don't think it's funny
[00:57:11] I'm like actually I was intentionally being a six-
[00:57:14] It was supposed to be racist
[00:57:17] Comedy is what's known as art outsider. All right. Yeah
[00:57:22] Nick used to sleep outside. Yeah, exactly. Well, yeah, I guess we're out of time if you guys get a jet
[00:57:28] Roll yeah, okay. Well, thanks. All right. That's what are you calling in race? Come yeah
[00:57:33] I think it's um something later not come wars