[00:00:00] okay and we've uh tried to start the podcast twice now yeah yep let's go

[00:00:07] my anxiety about this goddamn computer computer is fucking me up hey man don't

[00:00:13] worry about it forget it's even there uh i can't do it man pretend it's pretend

[00:00:17] like you're having sex it's hard to be a producer dude i know man i want to go

[00:00:20] back to being just you know just the on-air talent yeah yeah man we need a

[00:00:25] producer man though we need either a nerd just proven that we don't need either

[00:00:29] a nerd that we all make fun of uh-huh we already got that we need a girl with

[00:00:33] make tits we don't we don't already have that we have a girl and then we also

[00:00:36] have big goddamnit yep we have a nerd girl we all make fun of

[00:00:41] and then so together it's a paradise so we're actually the producers we

[00:00:45] should be making half the money yeah whatever it's true yeah so take that

[00:00:51] me and i'm each make 50 percent saturday um i'm sure we're all

[00:00:56] we're reacting we're still reeling from the gop memo oh my god i can't believe

[00:01:01] it bomb show yeah the that one guy has read it too oh yeah i read it everyone

[00:01:06] everyone cares about it yeah i love how just out of touch the

[00:01:09] New York Times is with what most people care about yeah who gives a shit about

[00:01:13] this number one thing i mean like who in the who would

[00:01:16] what kind of regular americans when i say regular americans when i say regular

[00:01:20] americans i mean the people that go into starbucks with a gun and demand that

[00:01:23] they write merry christmas they kind of americans we all appreciate in love

[00:01:29] uh who which one show me those guys that give us

[00:01:33] all about this russia emails or whatever it's all like baby boomer

[00:01:38] democrats yeah but that's a lot of people though it's a lot of people it's like

[00:01:41] people thought hilly was cool exactly yeah like

[00:01:45] russia in also though who is gonna memos are one of the

[00:01:49] gayest things of all time yeah who cares about a memo yeah

[00:01:53] you know what i mean it's a from work it's annoying you want somebody to read

[00:01:57] something let's make it a tattoo that's right yes

[00:02:01] on his butt cheeks that's fucking yeah we're gonna we're gonna get a whole

[00:02:05] big back piece on mitch macabre that's right all fucked up right in on his

[00:02:09] fucked up fucked up uh throat dude you just stretch that and write a lot of

[00:02:13] fucking shit on there yeah hillary fucker dimes grim reaper holding the

[00:02:17] that's good the scales of justice yes fucker die

[00:02:21] yeah it's bill cleanse dick on one side of the scale and

[00:02:24] the other side of the scale is a slice of pizza oh oh i see

[00:02:28] the main thing with the memo is that would be a cool memo that's a cool tattoo

[00:02:32] actually i would have that that too the creep

[00:02:35] it's bill cleanse dick and then a slice of pizza on the other one

[00:02:40] that fucking rules man i want that actually

[00:02:44] that's that's what i would read that i would spend a lot of time looking at

[00:02:49] that yeah man oh if the memo means he's gonna

[00:02:54] finally lock her up then i'll pay a second lock her up baby that's that's

[00:02:58] my policy if he's not gonna throw her in jail

[00:03:02] hillary clinton i'm gonna go to a sweet jail would it even matter she'd probably

[00:03:06] go to martha steward jail uh doing it to like play tennis and shit

[00:03:09] we're all gonna go to martha steward jail for

[00:03:11] are we for what tax evasion for zadam insulted the state of israel

[00:03:16] yeah we're fucked man they've been they've been uh destroying our

[00:03:20] subscription that's true it's true it's all your fault

[00:03:23] i'm sorry guys nick from now on every subscription we lose should come out of

[00:03:27] adams pay directly we shouldn't we shouldn't face it

[00:03:29] there's no other way for us to make money the year of making money off crypto just

[00:03:33] ended that's right although if you do believe in the buying the dip theory

[00:03:37] this is this is probably as low as it's going to get

[00:03:39] what is it now um i don't know what bighorns that ripple hit like fucking

[00:03:43] eighty cents again should i buy some i wouldn't dude i i i would wait and see

[00:03:48] what happens i mean i think cryptocurrency is

[00:03:51] fucking dumb it could drop again there might be a

[00:03:53] little bit of interest now but it could drop down back into the 30 cent

[00:03:58] range again i mean the time to make money off if it can't like stabilize

[00:04:02] over a dollar then so a bunch of people just lost money

[00:04:07] then is that what happened no not the people that got in when i fucking

[00:04:11] was talking about it at 30 cents or lower it was a 12 cents when i was telling

[00:04:15] people to buy on the show and then when it shot up to to three or whatever

[00:04:21] three dollars damn anybody who asked i said don't buy it

[00:04:25] should you sell though buy low sold then buy low sell high

[00:04:29] right i mean sell if you you know want to make a profit off of it i do

[00:04:33] yeah well you didn't buy any yeah but now i'm going to a lot of people got

[00:04:36] fleas a lot of people bought cryptocurrency in

[00:04:39] december and now they've lost all their money that's what i meant

[00:04:41] people put all their time in it yeah

[00:04:44] people are dumb idiots yeah that shit is so funny

[00:04:50] dad why can't i go to college because i'm dumb as shit no i take all my

[00:04:54] financial advice from twitter yeah from people being ironic on twitter

[00:04:58] yeah and they're not going to get that money back

[00:05:02] no where did that go how does that add a stock's work

[00:05:05] so it's just gone it's not stocks it's currency well it's not gone it's like

[00:05:09] imagine you it's like purchasing anything else you have like

[00:05:12] property that you write and it's worth this it's worth less it's like if i

[00:05:16] just like if you spent a thousand dollars on a television it's like always going

[00:05:20] to depreciate in value that's true so if you've spent

[00:05:24] you know ten thousand dollars on bitcoin you know it's like worth nine thousand

[00:05:28] dollars i mean you just have x and out of bitcoin nice

[00:05:33] damn bro stocks huh wild shit yep it's not stocks

[00:05:37] yeah i know fuck i should have a caribou i'm so

[00:05:40] fucking stupid i don't know what i'm gonna do with how what do you invest in

[00:05:43] how should what should i invest in

[00:05:45] comtown dude and buy stocks in comtown

[00:05:48] you're just you're already invested you don't offer stocks i have a corporation

[00:05:52] should we should we offer stocks you guys should have a corporation

[00:05:55] i will i'm gonna start big dick enterprises yeah super hardcock

[00:06:00] what's another for enterprises industries yeah

[00:06:04] how is corp global global integration super hard dick services about sex on

[00:06:10] sex on very good sex on gas fuel the tigers

[00:06:18] and the tigers is hard to shoot it so it looks the same as that the regular

[00:06:22] ex-ons tiger but the tail is just a long

[00:06:25] bit but it's coming out of his ass yeah

[00:06:28] coming out of where the tail comes out that's awesome you fuck someone with

[00:06:32] your butt whoa you have a real fucking very long

[00:06:34] dick tail wow and then plus you have a regular dick

[00:06:38] i was in night school like somebody somebody was talking about what if they

[00:06:41] had two dicks and there was this kid who was like

[00:06:44] man i'll because they were talking about having two dicks and this kid was

[00:06:47] imagining he's like oh i thought you were saying like you have one in the

[00:06:50] front one in the back he's like that'll be cool man you

[00:06:53] fuck two chicks at the same time oh yeah like bigadabigada bigadabigada

[00:06:57] that would be cool yeah i remember that bigadabigada

[00:07:06] it was pretty quiet this isn't gigadee it's bigadee

[00:07:08] uh-huh it wasn't pre-family guy i mean family guy

[00:07:11] like premiered in 99 that's a 25 year old yeah God damn

[00:07:16] the

[00:07:18] the shit

[00:07:19] yet did it came on after

[00:07:21] this super bold

[00:07:23] falcons in the broncos no

[00:07:26] that was the first thought that he'd

[00:07:29] then watching and watching the super bowl and then watching family guy after

[00:07:33] the most super bowl

[00:07:34] that's where the first super bowl party that went to

[00:07:36] there is a kid nick

[00:07:38] who was my enemy he fleeced me for Pokemon cards

[00:07:41] he told me

[00:07:43] Japanese cards were worth more than American cards.

[00:07:47] So he just traded me a bunch of shitty Japanese cards.

[00:07:50] Oh yeah.

[00:07:51] For like, I think I had like a,

[00:07:53] a Charizard?

[00:07:54] No, but I wanted a Charizard.

[00:07:55] He told me if you had enough Japanese ones,

[00:07:57] you could someone gives you a Charizard.

[00:07:59] Cause you know everyone wanted that fucking Charizard.

[00:08:01] Yeah.

[00:08:02] And then he just took all my good shit.

[00:08:05] But, and now he's married with a kid and wife

[00:08:07] and he seems very happy.

[00:08:08] Well he owes you money.

[00:08:09] How about a, yeah.

[00:08:10] Charizard, like a Pokemon just made out of shit.

[00:08:13] That's good.

[00:08:14] He's evolved from Chartmander.

[00:08:16] Yeah.

[00:08:17] Yeah.

[00:08:18] And then we'll shoot shit out of there.

[00:08:19] Yeah.

[00:08:20] Instead of fire.

[00:08:21] He breathes shit.

[00:08:22] Yeah.

[00:08:23] He breathes shit.

[00:08:24] Yeah.

[00:08:25] Yeah.

[00:08:26] That's really good.

[00:08:27] And the tip of his tail is, is a dick.

[00:08:30] Yeah.

[00:08:31] But it's covered in shit.

[00:08:32] Yeah, yeah.

[00:08:33] And if it ever is not covered in shit, he dies.

[00:08:35] Yeah.

[00:08:36] Yeah.

[00:08:37] Who's thinking is that what happens to Charizard?

[00:08:39] He's not on fire.

[00:08:40] He's not on fire.

[00:08:41] Yeah, yeah, he dies.

[00:08:42] If he gets wet.

[00:08:43] No, if his tail goes out, if the flame on his tail goes out,

[00:08:46] he dies.

[00:08:47] So if the shit on Chartmander is that cost from speed,

[00:08:51] that's right.

[00:08:52] Yeah.

[00:08:54] I remember that episode of Pokemon

[00:08:55] where Sandra Bullock sucks off Charizard.

[00:08:57] I like the premise of that movie is that if like,

[00:08:59] a bunch of people who have to ride the bus

[00:09:01] or about to die that the police would do anything

[00:09:03] or get a shit out of there.

[00:09:04] Yeah.

[00:09:05] Yeah.

[00:09:06] Yeah.

[00:09:07] This is what we call a freebie boy.

[00:09:09] Wow.

[00:09:10] Yeah.

[00:09:11] Maybe they should figure that out themselves.

[00:09:14] You know, that's not my problem.

[00:09:15] Now if it was a limousine, maybe we do some then.

[00:09:20] That's a cool movie.

[00:09:21] How about a limousine that's going to explode?

[00:09:24] That actually is a cool movie.

[00:09:25] Unless the world's most important millionaire stops getting

[00:09:28] this dick sucked.

[00:09:29] Exactly.

[00:09:30] Because in the back it'd just be a fun party.

[00:09:32] The driver would have to deal with it.

[00:09:33] That'd be cool.

[00:09:34] Yeah.

[00:09:35] Speed 3 dick.

[00:09:36] Yeah.

[00:09:37] Yeah.

[00:09:38] If you stop sucking my dick.

[00:09:41] I'll explode.

[00:09:42] Is there a certain speed they have to keep going?

[00:09:46] Yeah, I guess.

[00:09:48] That's pretty cool.

[00:09:49] Yeah.

[00:09:50] That would probably be tough on your neck.

[00:09:52] For a girl to suck a dick for two hours a week.

[00:09:54] For like two hours.

[00:09:55] Yeah, yeah.

[00:09:56] I guess at a certain point she could open her mouth and just

[00:09:58] Keanu could pump.

[00:09:59] They could take a take.

[00:10:00] Well it doesn't have to be a girl.

[00:10:01] I don't know why you would look.

[00:10:02] It's a matter of life or death.

[00:10:03] You're right.

[00:10:04] I wouldn't trust something dumb.

[00:10:05] You want something to move like a strong?

[00:10:07] Yeah.

[00:10:08] I want a man to get the job done like a Gary Busy type.

[00:10:11] That's right.

[00:10:12] You know.

[00:10:13] Wouldn't his teeth hinder his cocksucking abilities?

[00:10:16] No.

[00:10:17] They would assist.

[00:10:18] Interesting.

[00:10:19] Because you also, you gotta make sure you're not enjoying it.

[00:10:22] You don't want to bust.

[00:10:23] Boy, you don't want to be gay.

[00:10:25] Right, right, right.

[00:10:27] So, Gary Busy's teeth make him feel bad.

[00:10:30] Oh, interesting.

[00:10:31] He's skinning off a little part of your cock every single time.

[00:10:33] Yeah.

[00:10:34] And it feels bad.

[00:10:35] Oh, see your cock needs to survive with it.

[00:10:36] But then what if, can you stay hard though?

[00:10:39] What do you mean?

[00:10:40] If your dick hurts.

[00:10:41] I don't know.

[00:10:42] Gary Busy, for now what we were talking about.

[00:10:44] You can stay hard.

[00:10:45] You're getting your dick sucked.

[00:10:46] Yeah, but by Gary Busy with his big ass chompers.

[00:10:49] Obviously, you've never been molested.

[00:10:51] Oh, you stay hard?

[00:10:54] No, dude.

[00:10:55] Oh, man.

[00:10:56] Fucking Blake has the funniest story.

[00:10:57] I don't want to like, dox him or whatever.

[00:11:00] Sure, sure.

[00:11:01] My friend Blake, who I've mentioned on the show, multiple times is very easy to find out

[00:11:04] who he is.

[00:11:05] He was molested and the guy molested him.

[00:11:09] Was just, yeah, was like hovering over him on the couch, crying and he couldn't get his

[00:11:13] dick hard and he was like apologizing.

[00:11:15] Oh, no, dude.

[00:11:17] Imagine being that guy.

[00:11:20] You're fucking a child.

[00:11:21] But you can't get hard and you're sad.

[00:11:25] That is the fucking worst guy of all time.

[00:11:28] Oh my God.

[00:11:29] Normally this kind of thing doesn't happen to me.

[00:11:32] Yeah.

[00:11:33] Here's a couple extra legos.

[00:11:34] I was going to give him to you as a warning not to fucking tell your parents, but this

[00:11:40] time.

[00:11:41] I swear to God, if you tell anyone I can't get hard.

[00:11:43] Don't tell any of the other sexy little boys in your class, I can't get hard.

[00:11:49] I don't want my name getting ruined.

[00:11:52] Damn, that's a brutal one.

[00:11:54] But the guys that molested you, they were always hard, Nick.

[00:11:56] I was not molested.

[00:11:57] You were sucked off.

[00:11:58] That's right.

[00:11:59] Not molested.

[00:12:00] Adam, how about you?

[00:12:01] I was not molested, but Nick definitely was.

[00:12:03] Not molested.

[00:12:04] Fuck.

[00:12:05] I would say he's a survivor.

[00:12:10] Have you ever been even close?

[00:12:11] Has there been a weird situation?

[00:12:13] As a child, were you like, because some kids like fuck other kids and shit like that?

[00:12:17] Yeah, yeah.

[00:12:18] My cousin used to like try to fuck me.

[00:12:19] Nice.

[00:12:20] We were kids.

[00:12:21] Nice.

[00:12:22] How old is your cousin?

[00:12:23] We were like, he's maybe six months later.

[00:12:24] Oh, right, right, right.

[00:12:25] We've talked about this.

[00:12:26] Yeah.

[00:12:27] I was trying to play like, yeah, I'm the princess and you're Mario.

[00:12:30] Right.

[00:12:31] I remember this.

[00:12:32] I remember playing games.

[00:12:34] Yeah, yeah.

[00:12:35] You don't know what you're doing.

[00:12:36] And you had a blonde wig.

[00:12:37] No, he didn't put a wig.

[00:12:38] He put a blonde wig in a pink dress on and he was holding his asshole open.

[00:12:42] And he was like, there's a mushroom in here, Adam.

[00:12:44] It's weird.

[00:12:45] Yeah.

[00:12:46] Yeah, kids like love showing each other their penis.

[00:12:48] I used to be like a flasher kid.

[00:12:51] Really?

[00:12:52] Yeah.

[00:12:53] See, I feel like I missed out on all that.

[00:12:54] Everyone looked at little pussies and showed their little dick and I was too scared to

[00:12:59] get in the mix.

[00:13:00] Well, I think I said this on the podcast before, but I used to like, my parents used to put

[00:13:03] me to bed and they'd have dinner parties.

[00:13:06] Right, right, right.

[00:13:07] Yeah, show your penis.

[00:13:08] Right, right, right.

[00:13:09] And you'd show your penis, all the dinner guests.

[00:13:12] All the adults, yeah.

[00:13:14] They thought it was hilarious.

[00:13:15] Yeah.

[00:13:16] Sounds like a real dinner for scoundrels.

[00:13:17] Pretty sure that's what that movie is about.

[00:13:20] It's like, what Farrow brings a bunch of child pornography with dinner with Jason Bate

[00:13:26] in his house.

[00:13:32] Just a bunch of guys struggling to get hard to fuck kids.

[00:13:35] We watch the first 10 minutes of Daddy's home.

[00:13:38] Yeah.

[00:13:39] Mark Wohlberg.

[00:13:40] That gets to come down to see a little approval.

[00:13:41] Yeah.

[00:13:42] I got to check it out.

[00:13:43] Based on the first 10 minutes, it had one genuinely very good laugh.

[00:13:45] Nice.

[00:13:46] Involving Wilfaire, losing his ability to have children from having the dentist x-ray fall

[00:13:52] down on his penis.

[00:13:54] That's a good bit.

[00:13:55] I bet Wil made some good faces when I was happening.

[00:13:58] No, he was like, this kind of feels weird.

[00:14:00] Are you getting everything?

[00:14:02] I've been running through Dragon Ball Super, not Z. It's after Z.

[00:14:08] Oh, Dragon Ball.

[00:14:10] Yes.

[00:14:11] Dragon Ball Super.

[00:14:12] No, there's nothing after Z.

[00:14:14] That's the last latter.

[00:14:15] No, bro.

[00:14:16] Dragon Ball Super.

[00:14:17] No, after Z is one.

[00:14:19] No, they fight in a big tournament for then whoever loses their universe gets erased.

[00:14:24] So everyone has their own universe.

[00:14:26] Yep.

[00:14:27] Sounds kind of brutal.

[00:14:28] It's pretty cool.

[00:14:29] Yeah, but I'm back to my childhood, man.

[00:14:33] Watching Dragon Ball Z.

[00:14:34] I smoked a joint last night.

[00:14:35] Nice.

[00:14:36] Yeah.

[00:14:37] To the face.

[00:14:38] I rolled a joint and then smoked it.

[00:14:39] Yeah.

[00:14:40] I called the Time Life.

[00:14:41] I was watching an infomercial for some like 10 CD collection.

[00:14:44] Oh, yes.

[00:14:45] Those are still pumping?

[00:14:46] There.

[00:14:47] They still out there.

[00:14:48] And they got this thing.

[00:14:49] They got a testimonial in there.

[00:14:50] It's first of all, it's all just like middle-aged, like black couples.

[00:14:53] You know, entrepreneurs.

[00:14:54] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:14:55] Entrepreneurs couples.

[00:14:56] It's the music we fell in love.

[00:14:58] And yeah, there's like they're holding each other.

[00:15:00] Both like, you know, the man's always wearing like a sort of like a fluorescent purple

[00:15:04] button down.

[00:15:05] Yeah, I do.

[00:15:07] And there's a small guy.

[00:15:08] This is one guy that goes in the whole thing's hosted by Pee Bo Bryson.

[00:15:11] It's the only guy goes, he's like, man, I was actually listening to it.

[00:15:16] And I was on the phone with one of my friends, my friend called.

[00:15:19] And he's like, man, what is that in the background?

[00:15:21] What radio station is that?

[00:15:22] And I was like, man, that ain't no radio station.

[00:15:26] You know, how, but your friend was like paying attention from multiple songs.

[00:15:31] You're calling.

[00:15:32] You're calling it half hour.

[00:15:34] Your friends just blown away that you would have the ability to choose what music you

[00:15:39] listen to.

[00:15:42] Your friends from before the era of like home recording.

[00:15:46] You have access to.

[00:15:48] Is that man?

[00:15:49] It's called a compact disc.

[00:15:52] C O N P A A C T.

[00:15:57] D I C S. God damn salute to anyone who's still buying CDs.

[00:16:07] Truly the fucking weird little in the middle.

[00:16:10] I called them.

[00:16:11] I called like, I was high as shit and like, what was it for?

[00:16:14] Like the oldies or something?

[00:16:15] No, no, it was like they were like, hi, how can I help?

[00:16:17] There's like some woman.

[00:16:18] She's like, hi, how can I help you?

[00:16:19] And I was like, well, she was like, can I get your full name?

[00:16:21] I'm like, well, I don't know if I want to buy anything yet.

[00:16:24] I was like, can you tell me, I'm like watching this thing with Pivo Bryson and it's got 10

[00:16:28] CDs and this is 144 songs.

[00:16:31] She's like, okay.

[00:16:32] And she like knew I was already like immediately.

[00:16:34] She knew I was fucking with it.

[00:16:35] Yeah, I bet you that's 40 like 80 percent of the songs.

[00:16:38] And I was like, can you tell me what songs are on the album so I can just make a Spotify

[00:16:44] for those?

[00:16:45] She was like, no, if you want to know what songs are on there, you can purchase the CDs.

[00:16:50] I'm like, yeah, I don't want to know if I want to spend $200 on that.

[00:16:54] That's how much they cost.

[00:16:56] I was like, that's like, that's a lot of money.

[00:16:58] She's like, well, that's why we have like a monthly payment plan.

[00:17:00] I'm like, well, yeah, obviously I can finance the CDs.

[00:17:04] What a fucking she was like, I know what you're doing.

[00:17:08] She's like, if you can't help, if you if there's nothing else you need, I'm going to have

[00:17:13] to move on.

[00:17:14] You should have given her fake credit card.

[00:17:17] She hung up on me.

[00:17:18] She was like, this is the worst prank call ever.

[00:17:21] I don't know what I'm making.

[00:17:23] Dude, they're just praying on poor old black people.

[00:17:27] Yeah, right.

[00:17:28] For that one.

[00:17:29] How you doing?

[00:17:30] My name is Shariis and I'd like to place a little 2 AM order for the 10 CD collection.

[00:17:37] I'm on my lunch break right now.

[00:17:39] That's what I call when I go home and go to sleep.

[00:17:45] They're all different types of lunch breaks.

[00:17:48] Oh, fuck man.

[00:17:51] My name is Eunice and I would like to place an order for the 35 CD collection, the death

[00:17:58] left with anthology.

[00:18:00] Oh, yeah.

[00:18:02] No, I don't want the Pibo, Bryson stuff.

[00:18:04] I'm more into like the heavy metal kind of psycho stuff because I'm crazy.

[00:18:09] I love the joke and I want to kill myself.

[00:18:15] Hell yeah, dude.

[00:18:17] I want that lady wearing fucking jinkos and like...

[00:18:19] I was laughing yesterday about like a pastor, you know, who had just seen Dark Knight and

[00:18:25] then he's like giving a sermon the next day.

[00:18:27] He's like, friends, I'll tell you that last night went to see the film, The Dark Knight,

[00:18:33] the second of the Christopher Nolan Batman movies and at first I was alarmed by the Joker

[00:18:38] character.

[00:18:39] But then I came to realize that the Joker character represents our Lord and Savior Jesus.

[00:18:44] And I thought more about him and how much we can learn from the Joker in our own personal

[00:18:52] lives and approaching things with such a more of a was so serious mentality.

[00:18:58] I'm like the pastor that's like, you know, wearing Joker makeup.

[00:19:05] He's like, I just identify with him.

[00:19:10] You know, and I know a lot of you who have been in this congregation for a while are

[00:19:13] thinking like houses different from your nightmare before Christmas.

[00:19:18] When you told us all that you were the pumpkin king Jackson.

[00:19:24] Oh hell yeah, dude.

[00:19:27] Just goth pass.

[00:19:28] Just say, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:19:29] A hot topic old ass man.

[00:19:32] Every new thing he just hops on board with.

[00:19:35] What are some other...

[00:19:38] My key prey on a my chemical romance face?

[00:19:41] Yeah.

[00:19:42] You know, serve your serve your country.

[00:19:44] Serve your family.

[00:19:45] Serve God.

[00:19:46] Bazinga.

[00:19:47] All of you were laughing because I'm different, but I'm laughing because you're all the same.

[00:19:58] You know, as we say our prayers before bed at night, dear Lord, thank you for all that

[00:20:03] you've blessed me with and my family and please protect me from the clowns so they don't

[00:20:07] eat me while I'm asleep.

[00:20:10] I'd like to thank the original Penguin of Doom himself, Mr. Jesus H. Frost.

[00:20:19] Fuck there was one I can't remember about voices in his in their head.

[00:20:22] Oh yeah.

[00:20:23] What is it?

[00:20:24] Oh yeah.

[00:20:25] It's a really good one.

[00:20:27] That was a really good time for a non-normal.

[00:20:28] Yeah, something like that.

[00:20:31] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:20:32] Say I'm normal.

[00:20:33] That's what it is.

[00:20:34] Something like that.

[00:20:35] Something like that.

[00:20:36] I remember my friends used to shoplift for a long time.

[00:20:39] I was from Hot Topic and they would try and sell to the white kids, but they didn't

[00:20:49] know my friend Paul of an African American gentleman.

[00:20:53] He didn't know what bands he was getting.

[00:20:55] So sometimes they were just butt-cheek bands.

[00:20:58] They weren't good.

[00:20:59] But then other times he came through with fucking a little bussab-eth.

[00:21:03] Nah, nah, nah, dude.

[00:21:04] This was during my long hair, taking guitar lessons.

[00:21:08] Classic rock days.

[00:21:09] Oh yeah.

[00:21:10] This is when I was fucking playing the beginning.

[00:21:12] Did you have guitar lessons?

[00:21:13] Oh yeah.

[00:21:14] I took guitar lessons.

[00:21:15] No, not at all.

[00:21:16] Two, my fingers are too fat and I lack the discipline.

[00:21:19] Yeah, we should jam sometimes, dude.

[00:21:21] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:21:22] Me and my brothers could play...

[00:21:23] So it's like the Ska Band back together.

[00:21:25] We do.

[00:21:26] We do.

[00:21:27] We do.

[00:21:28] We do.

[00:21:29] We do.

[00:21:30] We do.

[00:21:31] We do.

[00:21:32] We do.

[00:21:33] We do.

[00:21:34] We do.

[00:21:35] We do.

[00:21:36] We do.

[00:21:37] We do.

[00:21:38] We do.

[00:21:39] I just listen to one song.

[00:21:40] Do you know what?

[00:21:42] My new thing is ditch the Ska, get into spa.

[00:21:45] You know.

[00:21:46] Okay.

[00:21:47] The more mighty, mighty boss tones.

[00:21:48] Let's put those rocks on our back.

[00:21:49] That's good.

[00:21:50] Let's get some smooth skinned Asian woman to place rocks on her back.

[00:21:55] Take those fucking vans, check her board, slip on, throw in the fucking trash.

[00:21:58] Get off me a garbage.

[00:21:59] Get some paper fucking flip flops.

[00:22:01] Get them a mud mask.

[00:22:02] That's right.

[00:22:03] Get a goddamn mud mask.

[00:22:07] You know what?

[00:22:08] Press section.

[00:22:09] No fucking thank you.

[00:22:11] More like section of my cock getting jerked off.

[00:22:14] During a happy ending.

[00:22:15] I used to.

[00:22:16] I used to be really into Ska.

[00:22:19] My first concert was Ska.

[00:22:21] What was it?

[00:22:22] The Bonefish.

[00:22:23] It was the Aquabats.

[00:22:24] The Aquabats is that Ska?

[00:22:25] Yeah.

[00:22:26] Uh, it was the band Travis Barker used to be in before he went to Blinkwood.

[00:22:30] I didn't know he had a band before that.

[00:22:32] Yeah.

[00:22:33] They like wore like costumes like superheroes.

[00:22:35] It was pretty gay.

[00:22:36] Yeah, yeah, yeah, that sucks.

[00:22:38] Yeah.

[00:22:39] We were describing Sucks My Dick.

[00:22:40] They sang songs about like pizza parties.

[00:22:43] Oh, this was a pizza gate band.

[00:22:46] Yeah.

[00:22:47] That was kind of a pizza gate.

[00:22:48] Oh, did you see that New York Times article about Brock Pierce, one of the guys from that

[00:22:56] company that you watched Open Secret, right?

[00:22:58] Yeah, yeah.

[00:22:59] So Brock Pierce went to the

[00:23:02] Pico and like is starting a company like a crypto.

[00:23:06] He's like, how about you?

[00:23:07] Oh, Brock Pierce is the Mighty Ducks kid, right?

[00:23:09] Yeah.

[00:23:10] Yeah.

[00:23:11] And starting some company that they called like Portopia, like Bizballa, Puerto Rico,

[00:23:14] like P-U-R-E.

[00:23:15] Mm-hmm.

[00:23:16] And then somebody told them that that translates in Latin to eternal boy paradise.

[00:23:21] That's incredible.

[00:23:22] And he's like a pedophile.

[00:23:24] He's like, that is so good.

[00:23:27] Yeah.

[00:23:28] Admittedly, you know, he was really good.

[00:23:32] He was raped in, you know.

[00:23:33] That rules.

[00:23:34] Yeah.

[00:23:35] Sexed in.

[00:23:36] Sexed in.

[00:23:37] Well, that fucking rule.

[00:23:38] Man of the cloth.

[00:23:39] Yeah.

[00:23:40] He's sexed in it.

[00:23:42] God damn that fucking rules.

[00:23:44] Wait, so what does the company do?

[00:23:46] It fucks boys?

[00:23:47] Yeah, it's all like crypto related.

[00:23:49] Now he's he's creating a community where like everything is done with crypto and all

[00:23:53] contracts are public and.

[00:23:54] Wow.

[00:23:55] What a great time to do that.

[00:23:57] Yeah.

[00:23:58] My friend that I've brought up a bunch of times.

[00:24:00] The picture of the picture of him in the article is like he's dressed like Willy Wonka.

[00:24:04] He's just like all.

[00:24:05] He's just like every single one of Johnny Depp's characters.

[00:24:08] Oh, yeah.

[00:24:09] Long Ranger fucking.

[00:24:10] Oh, I forgot.

[00:24:11] He was Tonto in that.

[00:24:12] Yeah.

[00:24:13] Look at the feathers.

[00:24:14] Yeah.

[00:24:15] Yeah.

[00:24:16] He's dressed like dad.

[00:24:17] He's dressed like Jack.

[00:24:18] What's his face?

[00:24:19] Rip skeleton.

[00:24:20] Jack Sparrow.

[00:24:21] Jack Sparrow.

[00:24:22] Yeah.

[00:24:23] Jack Skeleton.

[00:24:24] Yeah.

[00:24:25] Jack Skeleton.

[00:24:26] I've recently seen the movie Pirates of the Caribbean.

[00:24:30] And I know you're saying Pastor Douglas, is that you?

[00:24:35] Well, no, I'm Captain Jack Sparrow.

[00:24:36] Now you would think the Lord would frown on our makeup and the top hat.

[00:24:43] I find it to be quite comfortable.

[00:24:49] Watch so serious.

[00:24:51] What was your scob band that you went to?

[00:24:53] I was the first of my sons.

[00:24:54] It wasn't my decision, it was my friend's birthday.

[00:24:57] Nice.

[00:24:58] Yeah.

[00:24:59] My friend's 13th birthday.

[00:25:00] And then I saw my second concert was the scob concert for the span of toasters who

[00:25:04] were like legends.

[00:25:05] They were like older guys.

[00:25:06] Nice.

[00:25:07] And I saw a teacher of mine wearing like a full of food.

[00:25:09] Oh.

[00:25:10] Pandora like skanking.

[00:25:11] No.

[00:25:12] Yeah.

[00:25:13] That sucks.

[00:25:14] I thought it was pretty cool at some time.

[00:25:15] You thought he was a cool teacher?

[00:25:16] Yeah.

[00:25:17] He was Mormon.

[00:25:18] You know.

[00:25:19] He's probably a pedophile.

[00:25:20] He probably was.

[00:25:21] He made me play.

[00:25:22] He was a shine on the young boys who just want to see.

[00:25:24] A grown man skank.

[00:25:26] What's skanking exactly?

[00:25:27] He said dumb dance.

[00:25:28] It's a dance that you just got.

[00:25:30] Let's go.

[00:25:31] Do they throw their hands and feed you through your leg?

[00:25:33] It's like throw your leg.

[00:25:35] You kick your leg.

[00:25:36] Yeah.

[00:25:37] It's like a kind of a candy.

[00:25:38] I think I've seen Ian do it.

[00:25:39] Yeah.

[00:25:40] Ian was in a scob band.

[00:25:41] Of course we've talked about this.

[00:25:42] Sock full of penis.

[00:25:43] Ian's a fucking loser.

[00:25:50] Sock full of penis, baby.

[00:25:56] Dude a fucking concert though for your 13th birthday.

[00:25:58] That's going all out.

[00:25:59] Yeah.

[00:26:00] I remember one birthday I took the boys Pete who now lives with me.

[00:26:04] Elders who lives with me.

[00:26:05] A couple other boys.

[00:26:06] We went out and checked out Spice World.

[00:26:08] The movie for my birthday, baby.

[00:26:11] I think I was 10 or 11.

[00:26:12] Yeah.

[00:26:13] I was big in it.

[00:26:14] I thought Spice Girls were for girls at the time.

[00:26:17] Well I had a cousin.

[00:26:18] A girl cousin who kind of set the tastes for the whole.

[00:26:23] I was very into boy bands as a youth.

[00:26:25] Oh I thought that was for gays and girls.

[00:26:28] Well you know there was very melodic music.

[00:26:32] And by the way there's a picture of the Spice Girls going around present day.

[00:26:37] My roommate Joe Statz and I looked at him one night I came home and he had just passed

[00:26:41] out drunk to the music choice Comcast channel for like.

[00:26:45] Yeah like channel 9, 9, 9, 9, or whatever.

[00:26:47] Like baby lullaby.

[00:26:48] He's just all fucked up on the couch and it's like bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla.

[00:26:54] They kind of rocked.

[00:26:55] I bet that is so relaxing.

[00:26:57] Twinkle twinkle little stuff.

[00:27:00] I bet that shit rules dude.

[00:27:02] Yeah.

[00:27:03] It was funny.

[00:27:04] It was a funny sight to see.

[00:27:07] I just fucking.

[00:27:08] Yeah we used to use his Netflix account and it was back when like you just had the queue

[00:27:11] and then you'd have to search for things and then add them to the queue and then you'd

[00:27:15] watch things.

[00:27:16] Yeah I remember that.

[00:27:17] It wasn't where you could like just look through all this shit.

[00:27:19] And one night I got drunk as shit and fucking being Cubis added like every single gay movie.

[00:27:28] And then every movie for babies so like the Barney's learning adventure or movies.

[00:27:34] Just like because you have to go and delete all of those one by one by fucking one.

[00:27:40] So we put like 50 movies on there that just and it destroys your suggested titles and then

[00:27:46] fucking you know it's dad's is like I just love the idea that there's like a gay guy

[00:27:50] and he watches nothing but gay guy movies.

[00:27:54] This stuff for baby.

[00:27:56] Yeah dude.

[00:27:57] I like Barney because he's gay.

[00:28:01] That's the guy from Porta Topia or whatever.

[00:28:02] That's what gay pedophiles did.

[00:28:05] When me and that girl broke up I was like on my sister's door.

[00:28:09] You mean that girl you mean Dasha?

[00:28:11] No Joyce.

[00:28:12] So yeah Dasha broke up.

[00:28:13] We broke up.

[00:28:14] That was on my sleeve.

[00:28:15] I woke up on my sister's door.

[00:28:16] Cause she's dating a guy with a cuter dog.

[00:28:18] That's not true.

[00:28:19] Because your dog.

[00:28:20] Because your dog.

[00:28:21] Because your dog.

[00:28:22] No because your dog stopped working.

[00:28:24] My dog didn't stop working.

[00:28:26] She's dating somebody that is a pet sable.

[00:28:29] That would be cool.

[00:28:30] That would be a little muskrat.

[00:28:31] Fuck.

[00:28:32] No fuck muskrat.

[00:28:33] That guy that's got a whole muskrat then.

[00:28:35] That sounds horrible dude.

[00:28:36] Fuck muskrat.

[00:28:37] That's a 35 muskrat dude.

[00:28:39] Yo fuck that video that rat put wax lips on.

[00:28:41] I don't give a fuck what it is.

[00:28:47] It sucked.

[00:28:48] I got mad at him.

[00:28:49] South American animal do you mean a Puerto Rican rattles?

[00:28:52] No.

[00:28:53] It's technically incorrect cause Puerto Rico is non-South America and snakes aren't animals.

[00:28:58] Snakes are reptiles.

[00:28:59] Snakes are animals.

[00:29:00] No they're reptiles.

[00:29:01] Reptiles are not animals.

[00:29:03] No they're not.

[00:29:04] They're not in the animals.

[00:29:05] Animals are only creatures that lay in.

[00:29:06] Somebody.

[00:29:07] Oh okay.

[00:29:08] That makes sense.

[00:29:09] Someone tried to tell me that it was the term for all leafy greens.

[00:29:16] She was like yeah I'm going to get some lettuce in my armour.

[00:29:20] I was like ugh lettuce.

[00:29:21] She was like well spinach.

[00:29:23] That's not the lettuce.

[00:29:25] That's not lettuce.

[00:29:26] First of all lettuce sucks my dick dude.

[00:29:28] Who the fuck likes it?

[00:29:29] There's no flavour.

[00:29:30] There's no nutrients.

[00:29:31] I like lettuce on a burger.

[00:29:32] Nah dude.

[00:29:33] I like lettuce in a wrap and fill it up.

[00:29:35] No.

[00:29:36] Put spinach in there over lettuce.

[00:29:37] I like a mezcalin you know mix.

[00:29:39] A mezcalin blunt blend.

[00:29:40] Yeah.

[00:29:41] The dark ones.

[00:29:42] A little ruegol every once in a while.

[00:29:43] A little bitterness.

[00:29:44] A little bit of ruegol a little bit of purple joints.

[00:29:46] The purples.

[00:29:47] Yes.

[00:29:48] Red bib lettuce.

[00:29:49] You fuck with bib lettuce.

[00:29:51] Yeah the buttery bib lettuce is good on burgers.

[00:29:55] Buttery bib lettuce.

[00:29:56] What is it called?

[00:29:57] Boston.

[00:29:58] That sounds good dude.

[00:29:59] Butter.

[00:30:00] Some things.

[00:30:01] Fauci beans.

[00:30:02] Beantown.

[00:30:03] I'm going to take a quick break so I can get a coffee because I'm about to pass the fuck

[00:30:07] out and I have spots all night long.

[00:30:09] Nice.

[00:30:10] And we'll be back for the second half of the show.

[00:30:12] There's no ad if you're already getting mad and typing an angry comment about ads being

[00:30:17] on the premium episodes.

[00:30:18] That's not what's happening.

[00:30:20] We're taking regular fucking breaks.

[00:30:22] Yeah suck my nuts.

[00:30:23] We'll be back in a second.

[00:30:24] Bitch.

[00:30:25] I'll tell you to shut up if I have to tell you to shut up.

[00:30:28] Beach.

[00:30:29] Hold on.

[00:30:30] Wait.

[00:30:31] Is this recording?

[00:30:32] Are we recording?

[00:30:33] Nice.

[00:30:34] I would never say shut up to you.

[00:30:37] Hold the fucking mic close to your mouth.

[00:30:39] Sorry.

[00:30:40] Yeah.

[00:30:41] Let's get some levels.

[00:30:42] There's levels.

[00:30:43] Yeah.

[00:30:44] It's working.

[00:30:45] Alright we're good.

[00:30:46] How's your coffee that I made you?

[00:30:47] Shut up.

[00:30:48] Don't tell me to shut up.

[00:30:49] Ah man I love drinking coffee.

[00:30:52] Anyways yeah so yeah we took a break here and we want to tell you about a new plan we

[00:30:57] have so I don't know if you've seen the videos.

[00:31:00] I've seen a couple of like flyers around town that's like you take a number for whatever

[00:31:05] reason but it's like you know we're trying to raise money to send black kids to go see

[00:31:10] black panther.

[00:31:11] So why would you take a number for that?

[00:31:13] Yeah I don't know.

[00:31:14] You call the number and then give them your credit card information.

[00:31:17] Oh okay.

[00:31:18] You just copied the number down from the sun.

[00:31:20] Anyway so I don't have the energy to fucking do it but if any one of you wants to go and

[00:31:24] make an inspirational video where you pirate a bunch of pirate torrent the new black panther

[00:31:30] movie yeah just get a screener and then make a bunch of copies and hand out the copies

[00:31:35] for free to black kids because the most important thing is that they see the movie.

[00:31:38] That's right.

[00:31:39] It's not that you know Marvel makes money.

[00:31:41] That's not that's not why there's all this media attention to the black panther movie.

[00:31:46] It's certainly not just a pandering ploy to exploit black history month to make money

[00:31:51] for a movie studio.

[00:31:53] It's just important that these kids get representation.

[00:31:55] Absolutely.

[00:31:56] You know on the big screen so make sure that yeah you you find any way to just get

[00:32:00] the movie to these kids preferably by stealing it.

[00:32:03] Absolutely.

[00:32:04] See I'm not going to steal it because for me going to see the black panther is all about

[00:32:08] what you wear to go see the black panther.

[00:32:10] Oh yeah.

[00:32:11] Yes you got your you got your purple carpet outfit ready.

[00:32:14] I'm going to get my purple carpet outfit.

[00:32:16] Yeah real real right but they do this every time.

[00:32:19] Remember they did this with training day they were like we need to get these black kindergarten.

[00:32:22] Yeah I mean I remember it was big for me as a child when the Willie Wonka movie came

[00:32:43] out and they made us all the fat kids they showed us the part where Augustus glued becomes

[00:32:49] biggest fuck turns into blueberry so that was big for me.

[00:32:52] That's violet or whatever man I don't give a fuck.

[00:32:54] Augustus glued falls in the river whatever man who cares chocolate.

[00:32:57] Hell yeah.

[00:32:58] It works either way.

[00:32:59] I'm eating all of your taste cookies.

[00:33:00] Damn I'm about to get another taste actually.

[00:33:02] I'm jealous.

[00:33:03] I don't know a lot more a nice warm cookie dipped in chocolate or a coffee.

[00:33:08] Coffee.

[00:33:09] You know what I love more than that.

[00:33:10] I feel like I'm in France.

[00:33:11] Is that what they do all day they just eat cookies and dip them in chicken coffee.

[00:33:17] Anyway well as a man who went to France this summer.

[00:33:21] Just we just we blast eggs.

[00:33:24] Just we blast eggs.

[00:33:26] Just we jam a per cookie.

[00:33:29] Jam la pussy.

[00:33:31] Jam la pussy.

[00:33:34] Mmm.

[00:33:35] Madam.

[00:33:36] Montfaire.

[00:33:37] Montfaire.

[00:33:38] Me to two pin wild don't sell Montbouche.

[00:33:42] We win Montgate Freire.

[00:33:45] Madam.

[00:33:47] Eley un faguette.

[00:33:49] You made a long bread.

[00:33:50] A long bread yeah yeah.

[00:33:52] Oh nice thank you.

[00:33:54] Mmm hmm.

[00:33:55] Yeah.

[00:33:56] It's a baguette someone puts in their ass.

[00:33:57] It's a baguette.

[00:33:58] I've said that on the show before.

[00:34:02] Really I think so.

[00:34:03] Nice I mean probably.

[00:34:04] Hey man.

[00:34:05] Sounds like it.

[00:34:06] All I know is that's a good bit whoever did it.

[00:34:09] Yeah.

[00:34:10] Goddamn.

[00:34:11] Man Tate's cookies are so good.

[00:34:12] They really fucking are.

[00:34:13] I haven't had Chris Peterson a while and I figured I might as well Kate.

[00:34:15] I'm not going to be sleeping.

[00:34:16] Yeah.

[00:34:17] Why aren't you sleeping?

[00:34:18] No you know what I'm doing I'm trying to just keep my weight in like a five pound window

[00:34:23] so it's been pretty stable if you can go a little overboard then once it hits again like

[00:34:28] a cup.

[00:34:29] I know that's not how diet is.

[00:34:31] Couple pound little chips.

[00:34:32] It's all water weight anyways you know.

[00:34:33] Yeah but.

[00:34:34] You should go to the Schvitz.

[00:34:36] Let's call this a cheat day.

[00:34:37] Okay.

[00:34:38] I have 17 cookies.

[00:34:39] That's just a cheat day.

[00:34:41] I this might not come as a surprise to many people but.

[00:34:45] You're off the wagon.

[00:34:46] I'm off the wagon.

[00:34:47] You know.

[00:34:48] You want to talk about your medical issue on the show?

[00:34:51] Yeah.

[00:34:52] Yeah.

[00:34:53] Why not?

[00:34:54] I went to I went to go get my fucked up tooth fixed and then I go to the I get an x-ray and

[00:34:58] the fucking dentist is like well we're not dealing with your tooth.

[00:35:01] You got some shit that's fucked up and he points to something like a growth in my jaw

[00:35:05] and he's like you got to go to a fucking surgeon today or tomorrow and I was like Jesus Christ

[00:35:09] I thought I was going to fucking die.

[00:35:11] So I just spent a whole day just fucking panicking.

[00:35:14] I make an appointment to go.

[00:35:16] I can't feel shit.

[00:35:17] I don't know what the fuck it is.

[00:35:18] This feels like a regular.

[00:35:19] It just feels like my yeah.

[00:35:20] Touch the other side of your jaw.

[00:35:21] Feels exactly the same and even he examined it and felt the same but he was freaking out.

[00:35:25] The first dentist was freaking the fuck out so I thought I was going to fucking die dude.

[00:35:28] I thought I was going to get that Roger that fucking Ebert fucked up.

[00:35:32] No jaw face type shit.

[00:35:33] Talk with the computer.

[00:35:34] Talk with the computer.

[00:35:35] Although that would be pretty cool.

[00:35:36] Yeah.

[00:35:37] Just have to stop.

[00:35:38] Suck my day.

[00:35:39] That would be cool actually.

[00:35:40] I ran by writing software.

[00:35:45] But I went to an oral surgeon and he took.

[00:35:48] We should replace Stephen Hawking's machine with the stop button.

[00:35:53] Black holes are gay or they're good or they have big dicks.

[00:35:58] Those are the two.

[00:36:00] Black holes have big dicks.

[00:36:04] And then he sent me to a fucking oral surgeon and he was much less freaked out but I took

[00:36:09] a 3D x-ray and the motherfucker is in Florida on vacation so I'm not going to find out

[00:36:14] if I'm going to die or not for a week.

[00:36:16] So to cope with that I have been eating absolute dog shit.

[00:36:21] I've been getting drunk.

[00:36:22] I've been taking pills.

[00:36:23] I've been damn smoking weed.

[00:36:25] Stop throwing that.

[00:36:26] Where'd they come back and they're like no there's just an Oreo in your cheek.

[00:36:29] You missed.

[00:36:30] There's a series of Mike and Ike's build up.

[00:36:33] Yeah.

[00:36:34] We had Adam were saying though it would be nice if you had some kind of like just easy

[00:36:38] cancer.

[00:36:39] You gotta do chemo or whatever.

[00:36:40] Yeah.

[00:36:41] Like you're going to lose your hair.

[00:36:42] Easy cancer would be great.

[00:36:43] Yeah.

[00:36:44] Because I mean yeah.

[00:36:45] You would have a beautiful hair.

[00:36:46] You would excuse.

[00:36:47] You have an excuse to be bald.

[00:36:48] Well I do.

[00:36:49] I'm not bald but yeah.

[00:36:50] That would be brutal.

[00:36:51] That would be tough.

[00:36:52] That would be the kick in your ass you need to finally like turn your life around.

[00:36:54] I definitely wouldn't turn my life around but an easy cancer would be fine.

[00:36:58] Because you get all this sympathy for having easy cancer.

[00:37:01] Yeah.

[00:37:02] I have a lot of sex from that definitely.

[00:37:03] You know that would be nice I guess.

[00:37:05] You get sucked off.

[00:37:06] I remember one kid in college got like the most the easiest type of cancer and then

[00:37:11] anyone treated him like a he kept calling himself.

[00:37:13] John's John's Hopkins and phone.

[00:37:15] John's Hopkins and phone.

[00:37:16] Yeah.

[00:37:17] There's a non-Hodgkin's which is.

[00:37:18] It's non-John's.

[00:37:19] It's long John's.

[00:37:20] Long John's.

[00:37:21] Long John's.

[00:37:22] Silver is lymphoma.

[00:37:23] Yeah.

[00:37:24] There's regular Hopkins Johns Hopkins.

[00:37:26] Fimloma.

[00:37:27] He had that one.

[00:37:28] And he just kept on he kept saying he was a fucking he kept saying he was a cancer fiber

[00:37:35] but it's like I mean come on bro you have health insurance.

[00:37:38] It's like my.

[00:37:39] It's not that hard.

[00:37:40] Left before the cause calling himself is exactly yeah yeah yeah.

[00:37:45] But yeah I don't know.

[00:37:47] So I'm they're probably gonna have to slice up my fucking job.

[00:37:49] I don't know we'll see what this.

[00:37:51] What is it like on the bone or what?

[00:37:53] Yeah it's some weird fucked up growth on my jaw.

[00:37:56] What does it look like?

[00:37:58] I can't I couldn't tell it's just like two lines on my shit like I didn't I didn't see

[00:38:01] shit.

[00:38:02] And then the dentist was like whoa what the fuck like he wouldn't even.

[00:38:05] Imagine how fucked up it would something would have to look to a dentist take nor my horrible

[00:38:10] front tooth.

[00:38:11] Yeah.

[00:38:12] Do you know what I mean?

[00:38:13] He wouldn't even he wouldn't even look at that shit.

[00:38:14] But the oral surgeon was much less freaked out.

[00:38:17] So you know we'll see how it goes.

[00:38:19] Maybe you broke your jaw eating Korean barbecue.

[00:38:21] Yeah it's true I'm going back for my birthday.

[00:38:23] Do you don't remember you could have broken your jaw at some point just not.

[00:38:27] It's true he said it could have been a fucking he was like did you have any dental stuff

[00:38:30] done I don't remember any of that he said you know.

[00:38:32] Did you ever get punched in the face I've been in a couple fights when I was younger I

[00:38:35] played football I don't know I've got took a lot of fucking hits to the head I have had

[00:38:39] a couple concussive CTE I probably have CTE.

[00:38:42] I'm gonna fucking kill myself and keep my child touching experience.

[00:38:45] Yeah you play football you get to fuck one kid for every football year you play.

[00:38:52] Yeah make a wish kid that wants to meet you.

[00:38:54] That's right ain't nothing this world free.

[00:38:56] Yeah I learned that the hard way.

[00:38:58] That would be a great story for America is a story about a man that worked at the Make

[00:39:02] a Wish Foundation that was raping the child.

[00:39:04] I mean isn't that what they said Michael Jackson was doing.

[00:39:06] Yeah he was like fucking cancer kids.

[00:39:08] Oh was it.

[00:39:09] Yeah I don't think he fucked them I think he just slipped in the same bed.

[00:39:13] Bro he sucked those little kids off.

[00:39:15] I don't think he fucked them.

[00:39:16] Yeah but you're basing that on what.

[00:39:19] On do you think on I think that Michael Jackson had a had a arrested development like.

[00:39:28] Shut the fuck up.

[00:39:29] He fucked those kids.

[00:39:30] He fucked those kids.

[00:39:31] I think that he just like snuggling with kids.

[00:39:33] I don't think that's what happens that's what happens when you have a fucked up childhood.

[00:39:36] Of course I don't have a child.

[00:39:37] You just want to snuggle them.

[00:39:38] Of course I love having sex with children.

[00:39:40] I think he wants to.

[00:39:41] But when I say sex I mean playing video games.

[00:39:44] Everybody should love to have this.

[00:39:47] I mean I don't want to say fuck a child.

[00:39:49] To feel the love of a child.

[00:39:52] To feel the loving way a child just sort of embraces you.

[00:39:56] No.

[00:39:57] I'll send you into their mouth.

[00:39:59] You're Michael Jackson didn't fuck kids guy.

[00:40:01] We didn't deserve him and his talents.

[00:40:03] He's a great singer or whatever.

[00:40:05] I'm not making fun of him.

[00:40:06] I'm doing Bruno Giadenna.

[00:40:08] Hey this is Bruno Giadenna here for molesting children.

[00:40:15] I don't think he.

[00:40:17] I don't think he fucked the kids.

[00:40:18] He definitely fucked kids.

[00:40:19] What are you guys saying?

[00:40:20] Is Bruno Giadenna the greatest artist of all?

[00:40:22] I think it's a combination of the two best artists of all.

[00:40:24] I was sitting at the stand last night in the comics of the comics table.

[00:40:27] We're debating whether Bruno Mars was the greatest male artist of like right now.

[00:40:33] Okay.

[00:40:34] And it's like I could not have less of an opinion on.

[00:40:37] Who cares?

[00:40:38] Yeah.

[00:40:39] He makes good music but I mean whatever.

[00:40:40] I don't understand people who give shit about popular music.

[00:40:43] I so don't understand that like weird type of like intellectualizing about popular.

[00:40:49] Right.

[00:40:50] Right.

[00:40:51] I'm like Carly Rae Jepson and stuff.

[00:40:52] Yeah.

[00:40:53] That's big.

[00:40:54] I mean she's good but like Brooklyn guys.

[00:40:56] Yeah.

[00:40:57] That's a big thing.

[00:40:58] It's actually really smart music and it's not about like kissing a boy.

[00:41:05] Kissing a boy.

[00:41:06] I want to kiss you.

[00:41:07] You know.

[00:41:08] Hold my hand.

[00:41:09] But no you're right Nick.

[00:41:10] People are like writing think pieces about that shit and like using much too much too big

[00:41:15] of words to describe songs.

[00:41:16] Big words can suck my dick.

[00:41:18] Absolutely.

[00:41:19] Long record and say that.

[00:41:20] Hell yeah.

[00:41:21] I'm going to do the fullest degree of man word I'm going to fuck your ass up.

[00:41:25] If I see you.

[00:41:26] If there's something your ass out if there's a better not appear if there's any pages.

[00:41:29] If there is a newspaper I read.

[00:41:31] Hell yeah.

[00:41:32] The Garfield gets up to anything lackadaisical.

[00:41:34] Oh yeah.

[00:41:35] My man's getting his shit crossed the fuck off.

[00:41:38] All I know is if there's an O or an A or any B maybe a B that hole in the middle.

[00:41:43] If there's a hole in it.

[00:41:44] If there's yeah in a big word if you have a letter with a hole in it I'm going to fuck

[00:41:49] it.

[00:41:50] I'm saying there are a lot of short words with those but I'm not talking about those.

[00:41:54] I'm talking about big words.

[00:41:56] Yeah.

[00:41:57] You're talking about like if you highfalutin if I see that.

[00:41:59] Let's just think of some long words.

[00:42:01] Highfalutin classic big word.

[00:42:03] That's a big word.

[00:42:04] Say T word high.

[00:42:05] Jux to position.

[00:42:06] Yeah.

[00:42:07] Oh I'm fucking that.

[00:42:08] Oh I'm putting the juxtaposition.

[00:42:10] That's where you like you pull your penis through the jinkos.

[00:42:13] Yeah.

[00:42:14] Unzip the jinkos.

[00:42:16] Leave them on to have sex.

[00:42:18] That's the Jux.

[00:42:19] That's when you can't get a girl's broth and you get her tits over you position.

[00:42:23] This Jux a position.

[00:42:25] You position them to suck.

[00:42:26] Jux the position that's when Jake Bucey fucks a girl.

[00:42:29] That's right.

[00:42:30] I don't know why.

[00:42:32] I don't know either but it feels right.

[00:42:35] Sometimes I just let my mind you know.

[00:42:37] Let it go for a stroll.

[00:42:38] I just do art.

[00:42:39] Yeah bro.

[00:42:40] You don't have to tell me I'm a damn artist myself.

[00:42:42] Yeah.

[00:42:43] Yeah I'm an aspiring artist.

[00:42:45] Yeah you'll get there one day man.

[00:42:47] Thanks bro.

[00:42:48] I was in two of my friend called me and he's like man what are you listening to?

[00:42:51] What radio station is that?

[00:42:52] I was like man it ain't no damn radio station.

[00:42:55] What radio station is that?

[00:42:57] I was like what radio station is that?

[00:42:58] I was like man it ain't no damn radio station.

[00:42:59] What radio station is that?

[00:43:00] In your home in the year 2017.

[00:43:01] Me and my friend we were talking on Bluetooth by the way.

[00:43:06] Yo I was uh there was a I was in a fucking lift or whatever and the guy had was playing

[00:43:10] Migos in his car but he was listening to Pakistani or some shit music in his Bluetooth.

[00:43:16] And I respected that move man.

[00:43:18] That's a hard dick move right there.

[00:43:19] I love that like that African jazz it's some of the African guys listening.

[00:43:23] Yeah the like Ethiopian shit.

[00:43:24] Yeah it's really pretty.

[00:43:25] They got some good shit.

[00:43:27] Yeah I forgot the word for I'm hard music.

[00:43:30] Yeah I'm hard like Adam's like I really like this what is it and the driver's like shut

[00:43:34] up beach.

[00:43:35] Do not ever ask me what I am listening to.

[00:43:38] Guys in DC there were a lot more Ethiopians they'd listen that all the time.

[00:43:43] They got Ethiopia's got some good bangers dude.

[00:43:45] How about beat the offians.

[00:43:47] Mm-hmm.

[00:43:48] I'm from beat the beat the offia.

[00:43:51] Yep.

[00:43:52] It's like Ethiopia bit just but everyone beats off.

[00:43:54] Ethiopia is cool because everyone's uh Rasta right.

[00:43:57] Everyone looks the same.

[00:43:58] Everyone.

[00:43:59] I can tell they all do they all have the same face.

[00:44:01] They do have the same face.

[00:44:02] They are they really do man.

[00:44:06] But that's my thing is here's what I'm saying we've made progress in our society.

[00:44:11] I mean Ethiopia people even are hot as shit and they definitely like 10 of them and you're

[00:44:15] like oh this is just the same bitch over and over and over.

[00:44:17] But that's fine.

[00:44:18] I don't care.

[00:44:19] We can come on.

[00:44:20] The same hostess the same Twinkie looks the same.

[00:44:22] I want to eat every single one.

[00:44:24] Yeah.

[00:44:25] But I think it's progress because our fathers thought all black people looked alike but

[00:44:29] we think all Ethiopians look alike and maybe our sons and daughters.

[00:44:32] And why the Ethiopians all do have like the same exact

[00:44:17] I know but I'm saying I think that's our and they're all slim and tall.

[00:44:38] No I had a fan.

[00:44:39] No no no.

[00:44:40] My roommate Ephraim.

[00:44:41] That was his real name in college he was Ethiopian he was fat as shit and he had a

[00:44:47] sexy Ethiopian girlfriend.

[00:44:48] I was friends with him.

[00:44:49] Salute to Ephraim if you're out there I'm glad you're fucking your sexy girlfriend

[00:44:52] who had the same face as you.

[00:44:53] I bet you if you saw Ephraim again you wouldn't be sure if it was him.

[00:44:57] For sure I wouldn't.

[00:44:58] Yeah it could be any Ethiopian man.

[00:44:59] 100% yeah.

[00:45:01] A richrian too.

[00:45:02] Well yeah they look kind of similar.

[00:45:05] They're richrians right next to each other.

[00:45:07] But I feel like yeah they're a little different little different flavor.

[00:45:11] Yeah and that flavor.

[00:45:13] I was friends with a guy in high school.

[00:45:15] It's kind of you Ethiopian kid who taught me like get it you.

[00:45:19] Yeah I stole his bit for the rest of my life which is like interesting.

[00:45:23] Acting like you're about to kiss a girl on the hand like but then you kiss your own

[00:45:28] hand.

[00:45:29] That's good.

[00:45:30] You stole a guy's bit huh.

[00:45:31] Yeah I stole that.

[00:45:32] Wow maybe that's.

[00:45:33] But he was the first guy I ever saw do that I was like that.

[00:45:36] You see the first guy you ever stole a bit from and then you got addicted to the rush.

[00:45:39] Yeah it felt incredible.

[00:45:40] It's because of him.

[00:45:41] I felt like I was flying.

[00:45:42] That's a good move.

[00:45:46] He probably fucked way more than you though.

[00:45:47] I don't think he fucked much but he did burn me Kanye West the college dropout.

[00:45:53] That's nice of him.

[00:45:54] Which was very nice.

[00:45:55] Maybe he can burn some copies of Black Panther for my.

[00:45:58] They hand him out to children for my brilliant Speak Him Up campaign.

[00:46:04] Speak him up.

[00:46:05] I can add Buster's campaign to really stick at the Marvel.

[00:46:09] Suck our dicks Marvel.

[00:46:10] Yeah.

[00:46:11] Is that even a Marvel movie?

[00:46:12] Yeah it is I think.

[00:46:14] How about this?

[00:46:15] Carvel movies.

[00:46:16] Oh fuck I'm already on board.

[00:46:17] Wow stop.

[00:46:18] I want to know what's up with that little whale dude.

[00:46:20] Give me the back story and the whale from Carvel.

[00:46:22] They think they're a whale?

[00:46:24] Yeah.

[00:46:25] Maybe we see the whale from that story from the Bible where the guy goes in the whale.

[00:46:28] Maybe.

[00:46:29] Yeah.

[00:46:30] Maybe.

[00:46:31] And then somebody fucks his wife or something while he's gone.

[00:46:32] Do you think he beat off in that inside?

[00:46:34] For sure.

[00:46:35] That's the way.

[00:46:36] That was a tongue.

[00:46:37] I was three four times a day.

[00:46:38] I was a whale and somebody was like just nodding and inside of me.

[00:46:42] Just staying there.

[00:46:44] Yeah.

[00:46:45] Damn dude.

[00:46:46] He's shitting in there.

[00:46:47] He's shitting and pissing and nodding.

[00:46:49] Did he have a candle in there or something?

[00:46:51] Probably.

[00:46:52] He's just inside of a dark whale.

[00:46:53] We could probably see through the blow hole.

[00:46:55] Oh it's like a skylight.

[00:46:57] Just skylight.

[00:46:58] Nice.

[00:46:59] Nice.

[00:47:00] You never you fuck though.

[00:47:01] What was Jonas whole thing God was testing him?

[00:47:03] Yeah it's always a test with that guy.

[00:47:05] Fucking God.

[00:47:06] I would be so fucking pissed.

[00:47:07] He's directed no whale.

[00:47:08] Darianarian off to me.

[00:47:10] Yeah I thought so.

[00:47:11] Yeah.

[00:47:12] Yeah.

[00:47:13] Well the one with Russell Crowe.

[00:47:14] Yeah we're just wearing jeans the whole time.

[00:47:15] We're Noah Noah knows karate.

[00:47:16] He's just karate.

[00:47:17] He's just karate.

[00:47:18] He's just karate.

[00:47:19] He's just karate.

[00:47:20] He's just karate.

[00:47:21] That fucking rocks.

[00:47:22] That's very funny.

[00:47:23] I remember I was doing a bit about it when it came out.

[00:47:24] That rocks my cock.

[00:47:25] Yeah.

[00:47:26] Russell Crowe.

[00:47:27] Yeah.

[00:47:28] How about Bustle Crowe?

[00:47:29] Bustle Crowe.

[00:47:30] Oh you not entertained?

[00:47:32] He's just covered in cop.

[00:47:34] He's just ziggos.

[00:47:35] He becomes the world's most famous gladiator.

[00:47:38] He goes out there and he just busts his nuts.

[00:47:41] Oh yes that's his fishing.

[00:47:43] Maximus Nudius.

[00:47:44] Father is going to a slain son.

[00:47:49] Husband to a murdered one.

[00:47:51] Maximus Nudius.

[00:47:52] Hardicius.

[00:47:53] I know I will have hardiculous.

[00:47:55] Oh you're not getting brained?

[00:47:58] That's good.

[00:48:00] Thanks man.

[00:48:01] It's like Nick the other night but I didn't tell you stop.

[00:48:06] I went to the Apple store and it was like pandemonium.

[00:48:10] Why?

[00:48:11] Because everyone was trying to get a new battery for their phone because of that like live

[00:48:16] section lawsuit.

[00:48:17] Yes yes of course.

[00:48:18] I was there and then there was a girl crying because she lost all this shit on her computer

[00:48:22] and it was just very intense.

[00:48:24] And there was like this fucking Willy Wonka like aesthetic hipster guy.

[00:48:28] Yeah like wearing like a velvet blazer and like stupid curly mustache.

[00:48:33] That was just being a complete obnoxious.

[00:48:36] He was like saying like oh yeah I can wait.

[00:48:39] Yeah I got all the time in the world.

[00:48:41] He was like one of those guys.

[00:48:42] But then I was like really stressed out.

[00:48:44] Which by the way he does.

[00:48:45] Yeah yeah he has nothing to do.

[00:48:46] His parents paid for everything.

[00:48:48] His groom is mustache.

[00:48:51] Yeah but the funniest part of it was that you know they have those classes at the Apple store.

[00:48:56] Oh yeah we learn how to like use pages or whatever the Bitchess software.

[00:49:00] This lady was like man the Bitchess software makes this podcast possible.

[00:49:04] Yeah thank you Apple.

[00:49:05] And viewers like you.

[00:49:07] And viewers at home like you.

[00:49:09] So like the viewers at home like you.

[00:49:12] They're like lesbian kind of.

[00:49:15] Thanks to all the viewers.

[00:49:17] Genius Bart teacher lady was like alright we're going to learn how to do sketching on your

[00:49:23] iPad Pro.

[00:49:24] So if anyone wants an iPad Pro Apple pencil they're in the front and there's like this

[00:49:29] black lady who's clearly been there all day just to hang out.

[00:49:32] And she's like oh yeah I think I want to have one of them.

[00:49:35] Let me get one of them.

[00:49:36] Awesome.

[00:49:37] Yeah she's like takes all the classes.

[00:49:38] Why'd you do like gay guy voice for the black lady.

[00:49:41] No that's perfect.

[00:49:43] That's perfect.

[00:49:44] What are you doing right now?

[00:49:45] Oh this voice.

[00:49:46] Yeah whoa you're nailing it.

[00:49:48] That's the gayest voice I've ever heard in my life dude.

[00:49:51] Yeah it is.

[00:49:52] Nick isn't that incredible.

[00:49:53] Yeah let me get one of them apple pans.

[00:49:55] No no you lost it there.

[00:49:57] Try it again.

[00:49:58] Whoa there it is.

[00:50:00] Okay perfect.

[00:50:03] Let me get one and say it.

[00:50:04] You want me to do it again?

[00:50:06] You're doing it right now just say.

[00:50:07] Do you believe in my natural love?

[00:50:10] Still pretty gay.

[00:50:11] Okay go ahead.

[00:50:12] Yeah what's happening.

[00:50:15] I was like laughing at that story about Rose McGowan and that trans woman that got on

[00:50:19] it.

[00:50:20] What happened?

[00:50:21] You know what?

[00:50:22] I was like I'm in an event and fucking this trans woman comes out and she's like let's

[00:50:27] talk about what you said on X so and so podcast a year ago and you said that trans people

[00:50:33] aren't really they don't have the same experiences as women so that they shouldn't speak on

[00:50:39] women's issues or whatever and Rose McGowan's like that's not what I said and she's like

[00:50:45] yes it is what you said and she's like trans people are killed way more than women were

[00:50:50] raped way more than cis women she's like she's like it's harder to be a trans woman than a

[00:50:55] cis woman and Rose McGowan is like we have the same struggle but like you know we need

[00:50:59] to you know talk about you know this and she's like well what are you doing for trans woman

[00:51:04] and she's like what are you doing for real women or whatever.

[00:51:06] She's like real or not like that yeah and then they're like in a shouting match and then

[00:51:10] the trans woman is like dragged out by security while she's like cis hat white feminism screaming

[00:51:19] oh my god but this is all happening at like a Barnes and Noble so imagine you're just

[00:51:24] there to get your like retarded old uncle like a king of all right right right right

[00:51:29] and you're like yeah I'm looking for I don't like the Da Vinci code or something and it's

[00:51:34] just these two insane people screaming at each other and the fucking you know the show

[00:51:41] and tell area of Barnes and Noble.

[00:51:43] Damn dude it turned out everyone's dragging Rose McGowan for that and then it turned

[00:51:50] out that the trans woman when she was a man and when she was 18 got in trouble for a little

[00:51:56] rape a ducce onnie molesting a lot of 13 year old girls.

[00:52:01] Interesting so yeah everyone's like dragged shout out to that that come town fan that

[00:52:08] yelled at Rose McGowan.

[00:52:10] Thanks a lot.

[00:52:11] I mean odds are yeah to the patreon subscriber that got into it with Rose McGowan we appreciate

[00:52:20] I mean but that is like right like what's the term is turf right if you trans exclusionary

[00:52:26] radical family right so if you say that not to be confused with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle

[00:52:31] or Surfin Turf which is you say the steak or lamb chop getting periods and like being

[00:52:38] by a lot of people female gives you a different experience than someone that is.

[00:52:43] Turf's are hot dude.

[00:52:44] It's the hottest kind of woman.

[00:52:46] Yeah I feel like they got long necks.

[00:52:48] If you say they're different things then you're called a turf right which is a bad.

[00:52:52] I don't think turf surf feminists that lay eggs yeah and they can't regulate their

[00:52:56] own body temperatures.

[00:52:57] They have to lay in the sun out of the lake.

[00:53:03] What happened with that black lady at the Apple store?

[00:53:06] No Adam is just selling a shirt at a black lady wanting to use an iPad and he thought it

[00:53:09] was very fun.

[00:53:10] No no.

[00:53:11] They had a black woman but we would be trying to learn during black history.

[00:53:16] That's so fucked up dude.

[00:53:17] Adam day one of black history month time to go black shames.

[00:53:20] Yes and then there's some colorful some colorful ass sisters trying to go to the Apple store

[00:53:25] to get her learning did.

[00:53:27] Yeah.

[00:53:28] This fucking racist white man.

[00:53:31] Back ass me oh ass motherfucking white boy.

[00:53:34] Back ass fucking.

[00:53:36] Yes anyway the lady was leading her on a tutorial for drawing David Bowie on the eye.

[00:53:42] And like she was just responding to literally every instruction.

[00:53:45] She's like oh here's how you do some shading.

[00:53:46] She's like oh I like that.

[00:53:48] I like that.

[00:53:49] Yeah.

[00:53:50] Yeah you can just tell that.

[00:53:51] Yeah what a dumb bitch having a good time.

[00:53:53] I thought it was what a fucking what a idiot.

[00:53:57] She sounds stupid man.

[00:53:58] I wasn't calling her.

[00:54:00] That's fine.

[00:54:01] Yeah I agree she is stupid.

[00:54:02] I'm not going to get any more stories.

[00:54:04] Don't come out.

[00:54:05] Don't come out my fucking socialist ass podcast and tell racist ass stories like that.

[00:54:10] Yeah this is about Terphs.

[00:54:11] I thought it was cute.

[00:54:12] This is about Terphs.

[00:54:13] This is a turf only podcast.

[00:54:15] No are we turf?

[00:54:16] I don't know.

[00:54:17] What's turf?

[00:54:18] I don't know.

[00:54:19] What's turf?

[00:54:20] Maybe turf.

[00:54:21] You're an explosion area of trans people.

[00:54:22] Well I just think that they're different things.

[00:54:23] Why can't being a trans woman be different than being a cis woman.

[00:54:27] It's going to be great when the chappo the chappo Reddit thread.

[00:54:30] Is Adam Friedland turning into Ben Shapiro?

[00:54:32] Yo speaking of which have you seen Ben Shapiro's sisters titties?

[00:54:37] No.

[00:54:38] Oh my god.

[00:54:39] Y'all talk.

[00:54:40] Oh wait no I have seen them.

[00:54:41] Yes.

[00:54:42] No she's got that big bose.

[00:54:43] Yes.

[00:54:44] Someone.

[00:54:45] Oh yes.

[00:54:46] Someone.

[00:54:47] Yeah.

[00:54:48] They were on a redish guy like Lara Croft hit.

[00:54:49] They're unbelievable dude.

[00:54:50] They fucking yeah.

[00:54:51] What's huge girls there are a lot of Jewish girls with like the tiny boys and huge.

[00:54:54] Then big matzatitties.

[00:54:55] Yeah.

[00:54:56] It's weird.

[00:54:57] I remember at camp when girls would come back the next summer and be like.

[00:55:00] I'm going to just had the fuck.

[00:55:03] Had the fucking Yonkers out.

[00:55:04] It looked like yeah.

[00:55:05] Had the honkers the big titties.

[00:55:07] It looks like you know whatever their dentist father spent $20,000 but they were just real.

[00:55:13] Oh that rules.

[00:55:14] Yeah.

[00:55:15] Do you see a fat pair of Jew titties when you're a little kid?

[00:55:17] Yeah I lost my virginity some dubbedees.

[00:55:19] dubbedees.

[00:55:20] She got them reduced and I saw her in New York City with her husband.

[00:55:24] She was like a fucking Goldman like banker.

[00:55:27] Oh nice.

[00:55:28] Yeah.

[00:55:29] Her tits were smaller and I was like well I guess I won.

[00:55:32] Got her when the getting was good baby.

[00:55:33] I can't even see that.

[00:55:35] You fucked her when she was 14.

[00:55:36] I didn't see that.

[00:55:37] No I mean we were like 17 or something.

[00:55:38] Nice.

[00:55:39] He never got to see him in their glory huh.

[00:55:41] Yeah what a fucking loser.

[00:55:42] Yeah dude nice.

[00:55:43] But she also did have a rhinoplasty too.

[00:55:46] Fuck yeah.

[00:55:47] I got that big schnoz those big titties.

[00:55:49] Big schnoz big titties.

[00:55:50] I take big schnoz big tees over little schnoz little titties.

[00:55:52] I guess it's all over that big titties.

[00:55:54] Yeah but it's like everyone's got a cross to bear man.

[00:55:58] It's like you're being selfish.

[00:55:59] You're being selfish.

[00:56:00] You're being big balls.

[00:56:01] It is not going to have big balls.

[00:56:03] Of course it is but it's great.

[00:56:04] But girls love them dude.

[00:56:06] Like I said I've been told they have cool balls quite often.

[00:56:10] So that's I don't ever have my balls reduced.

[00:56:13] Wait show me Ben Shapiro's sister's seat.

[00:56:15] He's pulling them up right now man.

[00:56:17] Have some patience.

[00:56:18] Keep filling time.

[00:56:19] Like the pro.

[00:56:20] I'm saying that Ben Shapiro is a radical feminist.

[00:56:22] Yeah what you're saying is you agree 90% of the time with what Ben Shapiro has to say.

[00:56:26] No I don't.

[00:56:27] Yes you do.

[00:56:29] How could you say that Bruce that Kaelin Jenner who is a Republican rich white girl.

[00:56:35] Oh yeah.

[00:56:36] You have to bring.

[00:56:37] Yeah yes yes.

[00:56:38] They're unbelievable.

[00:56:39] God.

[00:56:40] Good God.

[00:56:41] Is that really his sister?

[00:56:43] Yeah it's his sister.

[00:56:44] How old is she?

[00:56:45] God damn.

[00:56:46] Her face looks like a bitch.

[00:56:47] Oh that's a cock between her titties.

[00:56:49] Is that a cock?

[00:56:50] Yeah.

[00:56:51] Wait let me see.

[00:56:52] Damn I would love.

[00:56:53] Why are you fucking?

[00:56:54] Let me see.

[00:56:55] You don't have a camera?

[00:56:56] You don't have sex with that lady in her big ass titties.

[00:56:58] No patience for your fucking horniness dude.

[00:57:00] Look I'm approaching this in a very clinical sort of medicinal way.

[00:57:06] Let me see them.

[00:57:08] No.

[00:57:09] Come on dude.

[00:57:10] Look them up on your own damn phone dude.

[00:57:11] I don't want your sweaty.

[00:57:12] But you have them pulled up.

[00:57:13] Your sweaty hands all over my beautiful iPhone 10.

[00:57:15] I won't.

[00:57:16] I made you.

[00:57:18] I made you my $1,200 self.

[00:57:20] Oh yeah can I say something funny when Stav is on the group text telling us that he

[00:57:25] might have cancer of the mouth.

[00:57:28] I was like oh my god dude I hope you're okay.

[00:57:31] And then Nick replies.

[00:57:32] Anyway guys yeah don't get the iPhone X.

[00:57:35] My screen is fucked.

[00:57:37] I've only had it for me.

[00:57:40] It's guffed up.

[00:57:42] I'm dying.

[00:57:43] I won't stop.

[00:57:44] I wanted to get the iPhone 10.

[00:57:47] I'm looking out of the way.

[00:57:49] If you guys are thinking about getting the iPhone X my screen is fucked dude.

[00:57:53] Yeah I was like alright I'm just gonna fucking keep eating chocolate bars.

[00:57:56] Yeah at that point.

[00:57:57] I was like.

[00:57:58] I'm gonna get a little ice cream sandwich.

[00:58:01] Damn I really it really is as soon as I'm stressed it's over dude it's game over.

[00:58:06] Yeah but if you find out that you don't have cancer you know like you know.

[00:58:10] Newly sawn life dude.

[00:58:13] Yeah I'll probably start yeah I'll probably start doing different kinds of drugs to get

[00:58:16] me on the right path.

[00:58:18] Back on the good drug.

[00:58:20] Like on Addys no more you know appetite.

[00:58:24] I'm gonna stop having sex.

[00:58:25] Addys.

[00:58:26] Just a pinch.

[00:58:27] That's what I do that's what I do.

[00:58:30] Yeah.

[00:58:31] Because I feel Addy I'm like I'm calling people that I knew 10 years ago and telling them

[00:58:35] I still think about it.

[00:58:36] I get like really emotional and stuff.

[00:58:38] I don't get emotional.

[00:58:39] On that yeah I just get very if I have a coffee and an Adderall forget about it.

[00:58:43] I'm gonna work hard to shift for two hours of the actress crash.

[00:58:46] I'm so tired dude.

[00:58:47] It's gonna be awful.

[00:58:49] Addys your spots.

[00:58:50] How many spots are you doing?

[00:58:51] Just two but I'm like I'm beat.

[00:58:53] I don't know the coffee doesn't work anymore.

[00:58:56] You want Adderall dude?

[00:58:57] No I can't take that shit.

[00:59:00] You want to suck my cock?

[00:59:01] No that'll fucking bring you a cancer will suck you dick.

[00:59:04] I'm not a grain of that.

[00:59:06] Nick said it was his idea.

[00:59:07] First of all I'm gonna stop being friends if you have cancer.

[00:59:10] I'm a fit fan dude.

[00:59:11] I'm a crossfit guy.

[00:59:13] I don't hang out with sick people.

[00:59:17] All of my friends are strong and fit and we're never gonna die.

[00:59:21] Because we spent $300 a month at the gym.

[00:59:26] Your shit is like 300 bucks right?

[00:59:27] It's 200.

[00:59:28] That's so stupid.

[00:59:29] It's so expensive but like I figure this way because it's like a block away from my apartment.

[00:59:34] I was you do go all the time.

[00:59:36] Yeah the old the old place I was going I would take a cab.

[00:59:39] I was brutal.

[00:59:40] Yeah.

[00:59:41] You should take a fucking train to go to the gym dude.

[00:59:43] It's crazy.

[00:59:44] Yeah you're just not gonna go to the gym.

[00:59:45] And that is the come town wisdom for today's episode.

[00:59:50] You can't take a train to the gym.

[00:59:53] And for more of these brilliant insights stay tuned to come town radio to only something.

[01:00:02] Is that even that's not even funny.

[01:00:09] You're pretending like the show is closing strong.

[01:00:11] No no it's funny that you blew it that hard.

[01:00:14] Damn there's been sisters.

[01:00:16] Now you're looking up to dude I'm horny for big titties.

[01:00:19] I'm on record is that.

[01:00:21] You also checked that shit out.

[01:00:22] I've never said I'm not.

[01:00:23] Yeah if you're in the New York area please come caroline.

[01:00:27] Oh yeah.

[01:00:28] Broadway February 15 10 p.m. tickets are $15 online 20 at the door.

[01:00:32] So get them online now.

[01:00:34] Trying to sell out if we sell out we get the club.

[01:00:37] That's right.

[01:00:38] We're turning it into Adams.

[01:00:40] Adams place.

[01:00:41] We named it after our girls.

[01:00:43] No we're going to name it.

[01:00:46] Graces for every girl.

[01:00:48] Graces.

[01:00:49] Grace the secretary.

[01:00:50] That's you dude.

[01:00:51] Okay.

[01:00:52] A show called Grace anatomy.

[01:00:53] Let's make sure Adam with a pussy.

[01:00:55] It's an arrow pointing to the pussy and it says the pussy.

[01:00:59] Is it going to be big and fat?

[01:01:03] Yeah.

[01:01:04] All right.

[01:01:05] Goodbye.

[01:01:06] Join the fans

[01:01:29] and stay patient.

[01:01:32] You