TAFS | Premium | 07/18/2022
[00:00:11] Every motherfucking time baby you know what time it is.
[00:00:18] America's number one talk radio show soon to be live late night show.
[00:00:23] And when we said late night that's just because there's no genre that can really define what we're going for here.
[00:00:40] The hardest working man in show business.
[00:00:53] They call him the taint of entertainment.
[00:00:55] Hello everybody and welcome to the Adam Friedland Show.
[00:01:01] Orda hi Ben David Netanyahu Mullen production.
[00:01:09] Ladies and gentlemen this is kind of uncomfortable.
[00:01:11] You're seeing me become what I am to become.
[00:01:17] You're the only man who believed in me.
[00:01:19] You're not even going to believe in results.
[00:01:22] You know but I can see results from a million miles away.
[00:01:25] You know you could have given me a fish.
[00:01:40] I don't know what you're talking about.
[00:01:45] They used to be a job in the Wild West.
[00:01:47] You know there's a retard that walked around with a stick.
[00:01:49] You go to somebody's property and be like yep there's water somewhere around here.
[00:01:58] And the pay for that would be you get a slave.
[00:02:08] I'll take one of your little syrup bottle girls you got there.
[00:02:11] Take up back to my shack that I attached to the back of the train.
[00:02:21] I'm really excited about the show today.
[00:02:32] We really wanted to spend time on this.
[00:02:34] The last one we forgot that the show is supposed to have a topic.
[00:02:39] And so this one we wanted to make sure that we started.
[00:02:44] You know make sure that we stick to the doing a topic format.
[00:02:52] And this is what maybe you guys can suggest because I'm not sure.
[00:02:58] We introduced the topic and then we go into the monologue.
[00:03:04] Because the monologue is more like a fun.
[00:03:05] But the introduction feels like a monologue right?
[00:03:12] There's not many jokes there because there was guys.
[00:03:16] Hopefully you're listening to this at patreon.com slash com town.
[00:03:22] For some reason it wouldn't let me change any of the Patreon.
[00:03:27] So I got to email somebody over there and figure out why I couldn't do that.
[00:03:30] But if you're listening on Patreon you may have noticed there was an argument between in the Patreon comments on the last one between a man that was complaining that we're not saying the N word enough.
[00:03:44] And then another guy who was upset that that guy wasn't getting abortions.
[00:03:57] But look when you're in show business the audience is king.
[00:04:01] First the king is the host of the show.
[00:04:31] There's a huge fight to threaten and kill each other.
[00:04:42] You're going to have to sign up to see the comments themselves.
[00:05:01] A disappointed man named Matt who works at the Subaru factory.
[00:05:05] Apparently works for the damn Japanese.
[00:05:07] I guess I feel bad about saying that but he.
[00:05:15] He was saying I work at the Subaru factory.
[00:05:19] There's nothing you can do about it to the other guy.
[00:05:44] And it's they don't the audience doesn't see that I consider myself like an artist.
[00:05:55] I he's his art is the art of the abortion.
[00:06:03] I guess I'm two in the weeds with this.
[00:06:06] My takeaway is that what they're both asking for in different ways is they want the show
[00:06:14] One man wants the show to be more right wing and kind of xenophobic and just sort of out
[00:06:19] in the open say hey, we need to do genocide.
[00:06:25] We need to make the world a wider place for guys to build super-ruse.
[00:06:35] And another guy he's saying you got a he's mad at me.
[00:06:37] He was like, you know, I don't understand how his response to a guy being racist is that
[00:06:43] He was he's insisted on abortions and then he's also upset at me.
[00:06:52] And the kings are telling me I don't want to put the kangs.
[00:06:54] I don't want to put a maybe that's the name of the well that's the guy that's his racist
[00:07:02] I don't want to I don't want to be big in ourselves up.
[00:07:07] But the fact that we in snow, big in please big in I'm going to big in.
[00:07:13] The fact that we inspired a healthy couple of big ends big in it and and selves see and
[00:07:22] He wants you to go farther than the and but that's as far as what's up as a businessman
[00:07:32] So we want to inspire that type of intellectual discourse in the comments and on the show.
[00:07:38] And if you think about like the old debates like the William F. Buckley James Baldwin,
[00:07:43] that is the format of the new hunt and freelance show.
[00:07:46] That's basically what we're bringing to the table.
[00:07:48] That's what I was getting to is that is that both of these because the other guy he's mad.
[00:07:53] He said, you know, he's like he said he's disappointed.
[00:07:55] You know, maybe I'll pull up the comment here.
[00:08:01] You know, every criticism of the show I take the heart because this is I put I put more
[00:08:21] He said he was disappointed in me because it's it's it's I got it.
[00:08:28] I have to either denounce this stuff or.
[00:08:40] Yeah, the initial Nick has been a real lefty.
[00:08:43] I'm going to say this word for like four episodes in a row.
[00:08:48] I understand that they always are, but it's usually less annoying.
[00:09:01] You know, and then a man named named him and David get into it for a while.
[00:09:09] Yeah, they go they go back and forth for what looks like probably an entire shift at
[00:09:19] And and and I said, anyways, did you guys enjoy the new episode or no?
[00:09:29] Honestly, it's pretty much a letdown without sounding gay.
[00:09:34] I would like some honesty, not the dissolved remains of emotional barriers you use to hide
[00:09:39] your actual ideals to be an entertainer.
[00:09:43] I've known you for a fucking decade or whatever.
[00:09:50] I turned a little racist, idiot, cool in parentheses cooler with you guys.
[00:09:55] And I want something more than a hangout sesh.
[00:09:59] Despite what these gay eight year olds say, you're not the bodhisattva.
[00:10:07] I mean, this is it's it's I have trouble parsing any of these words, but the crux of it, and
[00:10:18] Because I'm not I'm not arguing with this guy.
[00:10:21] He says, I want something more than a hangout sesh. And the other guy wants more racism.
[00:10:28] And exactly what you're saying is that the new show has got to be well, here's the thing.
[00:10:33] We got to not necessarily race him, but we should be the ones are, you know, we should
[00:10:38] We should have a guy works in a super factory.
[00:10:41] And he's like, you're you're just some New York Jew that doesn't know shit.
[00:10:49] And then but guess who we also have as a guest, Muhammad Ali, and that's pretty good.
[00:10:54] It's like the black man is, you know, or maybe I don't know another Jewish guy or something,
[00:11:00] But the point is is that everybody's in a suit.
[00:11:05] So that that makes it, you know, it'll be people aren't talking to each other in this
[00:11:12] And if we're inspiring that kind of a debate, you know, it's it's painful to see.
[00:11:16] It's painful to see how people are hurting.
[00:11:18] And the big question is who's doing that?
[00:11:20] Who would entertainment is actually asking any of these questions?
[00:11:29] You know, we did for six years, we put on this this charade a charade a charade a charade
[00:11:39] It's just a character I do and I'm just in blackface pretending to be charade, charade
[00:11:55] Listen, for six years, we did whatever that was.
[00:11:59] And then we came out of it and Nick and I looked at this country and looked at where
[00:12:02] we were at then and looked at where we're at now.
[00:12:05] And we're doing this because this is a this is kind of like what we feel like we have
[00:12:09] a social obligation to pivot in this direction.
[00:12:15] So the point is, is that we're doing it and we're doing that by having show topics.
[00:12:20] I think that the show, the top of the show, we go right into the what would you like?
[00:12:37] We have we have some famous musicians who are also here we go making music for us.
[00:12:48] Here's some good like this will be this would be good to start off the.
[00:12:53] Some of these they're doing these these these weird ads now.
[00:13:17] The news is the most important thing in the entire world.
[00:13:42] Many many have considered the news to be the modern world's Jesus Christ and newscasters
[00:13:56] Get the gods who birth Jesus themselves by creating the news.
[00:14:16] Do you have your watch at your the newsroom?
[00:14:23] What's like the next thing he's going to turn into like just this gay dick sucking?
[00:14:27] I would love to see him do a show about rodeos.
[00:14:39] That doesn't have like an Aaron Sorkin vibe.
[00:14:47] We need like the way no one in the real world would talk that way.
[00:14:53] We need him to get to we need him to do the Adam Friedland show.
[00:14:56] We need Sorkin and we need to get him on mushrooms and cocaine again.
[00:15:18] We got a whole thing prepared so you can go ahead and read it.
[00:15:20] This week hackers from the website 4chan have leaked new pictures, videos and messages
[00:15:24] from an iCloud account purportedly belonging to Hunter Biden.
[00:15:28] While the content itself is new, its substance is old news for anyone familiar with Hunter.
[00:15:36] People contact with his niece, his ass.
[00:15:39] And worst of all, a few more crumbs on the paper trail that could lead to evidence of
[00:15:43] a criminally significant level of influence peddling, potentially implicating his father's
[00:15:50] And despite a media frenzy on the right, and even some apologetic attention from left-wing
[00:15:54] mainstream news, the Biden administration and family at large remain silent on the issue.
[00:16:01] And it begs the question, should they respond?
[00:16:05] To what extent does the old adage family comes first extend?
[00:16:10] When New York Governor Cuomo was outed as a touchy Italian rapist, his brother Chris,
[00:16:15] himself now a disgraced rapist former CNN host, refused to cover the controversy in detail
[00:16:21] on his show citing a conflict of interest.
[00:16:24] Later we would find out that he had been more involved in his brother's defense than previously
[00:16:29] And while this fraternal, Omerita might seem at first glance like some kind of Goomba cosplay
[00:16:37] as mafia types, even Tucker Carlson, the Cuomo brothers number one enemy, acknowledge that
[00:16:43] family does indeed come first, and it speaks to Chris' moral character that he put everything
[00:16:48] on the line to protect his older womanly frail brother.
[00:16:53] But when it comes to protecting family, how far is too far?
[00:17:01] Is it troubling and fascinating questions?
[00:17:05] And let me remind you, for me, it's just a passing disinterested hypothetical.
[00:17:27] as a celebrity talk show host and political commentator with a responsibility to the public,
[00:17:51] I have to embrace honesty and integrity as first principles, but I myself have a mentally
[00:17:59] I often wonder to what degree I have to answer for him, not just in line at McDonald's when
[00:18:04] he touches the woman, but publicly here on the show.
[00:18:11] What happens when he smashes another frog with a crowball?
[00:18:27] And to be quite honest, my first instinct is to say he's my cousin, and it's nobody's
[00:18:32] goddamn business what he does with his penis, regardless of how big it is.
[00:18:38] And I can't help but look at Hunter Biden smoking crack nude in a sensory deprivation
[00:18:44] tank and see something of my poor mentally challenged cousin in me.
[00:18:49] And I see myself in the tired eyes of the president as he dodges yet another question
[00:18:56] Today on the Adam Friedland Show, loyalty or corruption, when it comes to family and public
[00:19:10] Ladies and gentlemen, the Adam Friedland Show, monologue.
[00:19:45] I think let's give this a little bit more.
[00:20:05] She's in the spy who fucked my fat black titties.
[00:20:11] That scene was quite a lot of people don't know that that's what they called it in Belgium
[00:20:14] because the rest of the movie was racist.
[00:20:18] All the other powers in the black bitch.
[00:20:23] They edited out all of they edited out all of the gold member.
[00:20:32] Which they love being racist to brown people in Belgium.
[00:20:45] I said, that's what I love about the POC thing.
[00:20:54] You know, if I had to remember all the bad shit that happened.
[00:21:00] I mean, I got a lunch with with with with Jeffrey Casenberg with the gold amir.
[00:21:11] I got a I got a business lunch with with Ariel.
[00:21:24] Well, you kind of put them all you kind of round them all up and put them in a little
[00:21:29] And send them off the I feel bad for you.
[00:21:31] That's why Nick, I don't want to I don't want to flex on you, but you have to impart something
[00:21:36] I call the atom system, which is, you know, one fact about everything.
[00:21:47] You know, King Leopold, very similar to the King from the comment section.
[00:21:56] Um, you know, they both want to rape the Congo.
[00:22:04] I will tell you maybe I'll tell you later, but they heard you like I went outside.
[00:22:08] I saw a black guy playing a bongo outside.
[00:22:12] And it's like, I don't know if I would be doing that.
[00:22:20] There's a lot of instruments Latin people play bongo.
[00:22:22] I'm not sure if you listened to Gloria Estefan and the Miami sound machine.
[00:22:25] I think I think they have plenty of hand-based drumming.
[00:22:29] After they released the GameCube accessory that was a pair of bongo the Donkey Kong plays.
[00:22:35] I think that was the sunset of bongo's.
[00:22:37] Anyway, you know, if you go to the monologue, if you ran the world, perhaps, but you know
[00:22:45] If I rolled the world, yeah, you'd be able to put bongo's outside.
[00:22:50] All right. And can we get some beeps for the news?
[00:22:55] All right. So that's the meanwhile, while we've been doing all the serious stuff at the beginning,
[00:23:06] the warm-up comic will have worked with the audience.
[00:23:23] Yeah. We got to make peace. I don't know if we could get it.
[00:23:25] We I know. If we got him on the show, it would be a must-ee TV.
[00:23:28] Yeah. If it would be incredible. It would be great.
[00:23:31] It would be so nice. Can we get Louis J. Gomez to broker peace?
[00:23:38] If Louis, like, because he's not about the real-ass podcast, I remember.
[00:23:45] Maybe we'll get that on. Maybe we'll convince Louis to put on some pumps and fish nets.
[00:23:51] And from the waist down, he can be a prostitute.
[00:23:55] Right. You know. And then they're just the black T-shirt up top.
[00:23:59] Yeah. Which, you know, that's how you know he means business.
[00:24:02] Yeah. That's the new Louis. The new Louis.
[00:24:04] He should have come out of, like... He's like a slut from the...
[00:24:07] People were like, oh, great. Louis is trying to come back.
[00:24:10] And then there's clips of him going on stage, and he's just awkwardly, you know, high heels.
[00:24:17] He can't really walk about the world. Fish net stockings.
[00:24:19] Just like a prostitute's thong. And then, yeah, black T-shirt from up top.
[00:24:24] Never addresses it. Cancellation done. There's no chance.
[00:24:28] Maybe I'll produce that. The Louis J.C.K. comeback tour.
[00:24:31] Yeah. That's pretty good. Yeah. Monologue jokes.
[00:24:34] And the warm-up comic kills... He's, you know, he's...
[00:24:38] He's like, okay, folks, are you ready for your host of the show?
[00:24:44] Because they haven't seen the top part. The top part serious.
[00:24:46] I don't want to detract from the news, but I'm just thinking right now.
[00:24:50] We have to name a number that Tom can't say.
[00:24:53] Six million. We don't have those money.
[00:24:56] Oh, I thought you just said name a number.
[00:24:58] No. I have to be like Tom. I'd be like, Tom, Tony. Yeah.
[00:25:02] You know he's already declined. Somebody offered him, like, $10 million to do.
[00:25:06] They didn't have $10 million. And it has to be a reasonable amount.
[00:25:13] Tom was like, some old agaric actually offered me $10 million.
[00:25:17] He genuinely... Yes. He genuinely turned down.
[00:25:20] I mean, this is a guy that'll drive the Indiana for $20.
[00:25:25] But he turned down doing... We have to get him. Yeah.
[00:25:28] We have to get him. And we're not... We'll eat nice. We'll be so nice.
[00:25:32] Let's go. We love him. Let's hit the monologue jokes.
[00:25:34] All right. And then I'll see... I'll get one of the PAs to drive to his parents' house and knock on the door.
[00:25:39] Okay. That's a good idea. One of the unpaid interns. Okay.
[00:25:43] And now the news, folks. President Biden... Sorry.
[00:25:46] President Biden recently returned from a trip to Israel in Palestine, or as he calls it, itchy and scratchy stand.
[00:25:58] The six day trip to the Middle East began... Sorry, that went just a quick feedback.
[00:26:02] I would try to marry Israel in Palestine, itchy and scratchy stand, so tonally they sound the same.
[00:26:09] President Biden recently returned from a trip to Israel in Palestine, or as he referred to it, itchy and scratchy stand.
[00:26:15] Yeah, that's better. That's why you're the king, man.
[00:26:20] Huh? That's why you're the kingmaker, man. That's why you're the game master.
[00:26:23] You should have seen Kimmel before I got my hands on him.
[00:26:28] That guy would walk out on stage, both shoes on the wrong foot.
[00:26:33] And he'd be like, women dumb bitch. Yeah.
[00:26:39] I was like, Jimmy, this isn't the man with Down syndrome show anymore.
[00:26:42] That was the name of the show in Belgium. They couldn't really...
[00:26:47] Because they don't have gender in Belgium. It's true.
[00:26:55] Yeah, retarded people. It's normal people. Women over there are called retarded people.
[00:27:01] It must get so confusing when a guy has a mental handicap.
[00:27:08] They go cuckoo for clocks over there when that happens.
[00:27:12] All right. The president went to sound... Oh, no. I'm skipping.
[00:27:16] The six day trip of the Middle East began in Israel, where Biden promised the Israeli people
[00:27:21] that the Holocaust is the only thing he will never forget.
[00:27:31] I'm just going to call a minute, but I rejected it.
[00:27:36] The president then went to Saudi Arabia and appealed to the Saudi leaders to increase oil production,
[00:27:41] explaining that as an Irish person, he has a lot in common with the Saudis.
[00:27:46] After all, both nations harbor partisan terrorists, engage in oppressive misogyny,
[00:27:51] and have a dumb outfit that looks like it belongs on a cereal box.
[00:28:01] Okay, well, crushing the monologue today, dude.
[00:28:05] Ivana Trump passed away this week after falling down a flight of stairs,
[00:28:09] which are the only steps that Trump has ever taken to make the world a better place.
[00:28:19] It's good that she's dead. I think that's the thing.
[00:28:26] Yeah, it's okay for us to take that take.
[00:28:30] Say, hi, I would have pushed her my damn self.
[00:28:32] It sounds like she fucked around, and then she found out.
[00:28:35] I said, where were these stairs in 2016?
[00:28:39] They're an escalator. That's Trump was smart.
[00:28:42] You know who we need to have a big public ticker tape parade for major...
[00:28:48] The German shepherd that Fox Jill Biden and the stairs that killed Ivana Trump.
[00:29:02] And we could put him in the back of a limousine driven by...
[00:29:06] I don't know, one of these fucking Lib freaks.
[00:29:11] You know, George Sakai, he can drive the limousine.
[00:29:25] Yeah. Since hundreds killed in a five mile per hour collision.
[00:29:43] You know, in Belgium, they would call him a woman.
[00:29:54] Yeah. I run a Trump passed away this week after falling down a flight of stairs,
[00:29:58] which are the only steps a Trump has ever taken to make the world a better place.
[00:30:12] I'm crying, but I'm going to do it over here where no one can see.
[00:30:36] Are you sure that's the song and not the...
[00:30:41] I know, but are you sure that's the song you want and not a different...
[00:30:49] Are you sure you don't want candle in the wind?
[00:30:58] When he finds out RBG is dead, tiny dancers playing...
[00:31:01] It's not tiny dancers from the RBG video.
[00:31:08] All right. Now you know what we're talking about.
[00:31:10] All right. Well, after being unprofessional.
[00:31:12] Do you want diversion from the almost famous soundtrack?
[00:31:14] That might be them singing on the plane, which I think is...
[00:31:21] When asked for comment, the former president said...
[00:31:26] I think there's a joke missing in here.
[00:31:32] When asked for comment, the former president said...
[00:31:37] I didn't know that. You're just telling me that for the first time.
[00:31:40] I'm actually sad to hear that. I'm actually sad.
[00:31:49] This guy can't walk up a flight of stairs if...
[00:31:59] I said you're going to end up like sleepy Joe.
[00:32:30] That was kind of admittedly made a little mid.
[00:32:40] It's one of the best moments of American culture in the last 20 years.
[00:32:47] Whether you agree with her or not, I'm actually sad.
[00:33:13] Do you hate stepping out of the shower into a puddle of filthy bacteria?
[00:33:18] A woman they got for this commercial is disgusting feet.
[00:33:29] Oh, so a tiny dancer was just playing somewhere.
[00:33:32] He was walking off stage at a rally and he had tiny dancers one of the songs.
[00:33:39] That's what makes it truly a beautiful one.
[00:33:41] Yeah. He comes up and he's got his finger behind his ear.
[00:33:57] I just, you'll tell me enough for the first time.
[00:34:08] Whether you agreed or not, she was an amazing woman.
[00:34:13] You know, I haven't seen the C-SPAN video.
[00:34:14] I thought, I was always under the impression that somebody just added it.
[00:34:21] It was a truly once in a lifetime beautiful moment.
[00:34:35] See, look, the problem with this is we're going to just be BTFO'd by Trump on a real show.
[00:34:42] We don't want people catching wind to the fact that this show is dog shit and it's not funny.
[00:35:00] Baby, one more time singer, Brittany Spears, took to Instagram this week to say she'd rather
[00:35:06] hang out with homeless people than people in Hollywood.
[00:35:09] When asked for comment, one homeless man said, if she wants to hang out with us, she's going
[00:35:14] to have to suck dick and eat ass like the rest of us.
[00:35:23] He then added, well, if she's going to be around, at least now we can tell people that the smell
[00:35:41] A TikToker who sent the city of Raleigh, North Carolina into a panic last year after a deadly
[00:35:47] zebra cobra snake escaped from his care is now asking for forgiveness.
[00:35:52] If he needs help apologizing for letting his snake loose, maybe he should ask disgrace CNN
[00:36:06] You should make it clear we're making fun of him for masturbating.
[00:36:12] Yes, snake kind of implies that he has a big dick.
[00:36:15] Yeah, snake, it sounds like an anaconda.
[00:36:17] He took his penis out and it was small.
[00:36:27] An African-American soprano pulled out of the Italian opera because Verona Amphitheater
[00:36:34] Of course, the very existence of an African-American soprano is heartbreaking news to fans of the
[00:36:46] Canadian PM Justin Trudeau's new haircut has drawn comparison to Jim Carrey's dumb and
[00:36:59] And some of his old Halloween photos draw...
[00:37:05] And some of his old Halloween photos have drawn comparison to Jim Crow's classic comedy
[00:37:15] We'll figure it out so you can actually say the words and I'll get better with the button.
[00:37:31] I've been doing that with the new hires.
[00:37:35] Yeah, all the set builders have been doing it.
[00:37:37] I'm like, I get them on camera and I say, you know, you gotta say it.
[00:37:41] And that's how we know we can work together.
[00:37:47] It's like that box in Dune or the little wooded area in Star Wars.
[00:38:08] You know how you can have your opinions?
[00:38:09] I mean, like this show is about opinions.
[00:38:12] Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau's new haircut is drawn in comparison to Jim Carrey's
[00:38:17] And some of his old Halloween photos have drawn comparisons to Jim Crow's class of comedy
[00:38:27] Maybe if something's too hot, I'll let you pitch it.
[00:38:30] Yeah, I'll be like, this is a Nick one.
[00:38:32] You know, I mean, just imagine for and then imagine a movie.
[00:38:49] Yeah, just Jeff, Jeff Daniels in a bathroom in Blackface having diarrhea and this.
[00:38:55] And fucking the girl is like, are you okay in there?
[00:39:01] He's like, dude, Lloyd, the toilet doesn't work.
[00:39:05] You know, and it's just it's just dumb and dumber, but they're in.
[00:39:15] A tourist in Greece survived 18 hours at sea by clinging to a football lost by boys on the
[00:39:23] Yeah, something like yeah, it's like some of the ways to like a castaway thing.
[00:39:31] Yeah, that was that was a little clumsy.
[00:39:35] Torson Greece survived 18 hours at sea by clinging on to a football lost by boys on the beach.
[00:39:41] Uh, yeah, something like yeah, it's like some of the way to do like a castaway thing.
[00:39:53] Like the whole ordeal is reminiscent of the movie castaway.
[00:39:59] Especially considering that like Tom Hanks, this man is probably a notorious pedophile.
[00:40:07] Listen guys, you're going to get the punch up on the show.
[00:40:12] These are still the test episodes, but I tell you what, the offer is in.
[00:40:20] I had to send a lot of financial information.
[00:40:24] We just bought three vintage French camera lenses from the Ukraine.
[00:40:31] Likely from a man trying to buy bullets.
[00:40:38] We're giving them bullets so that they can all end up on the black market.
[00:40:48] Listen, we bought camera lenses from the Azov battalion.
[00:41:01] People are not going to hype it up to you guys.
[00:41:03] You guys are going to have your mind blown.
[00:41:05] You're going to have to suffer through a couple more weeks of audio stuff.
[00:41:27] This one I don't think we really landed on anything.
[00:41:32] So if you guys, yeah, maybe we'll just talk it out with you guys.
[00:41:37] They've got a new number starting on July 16th.
[00:41:42] So if you remember 911, they got 988 now.
[00:41:52] It took that like, well, so now we're bumping up people that want to kill themselves.
[00:41:58] Well, I think it's kind of indicative of where we're at.
[00:42:02] And then what are the other 911, the classic, obviously.
[00:42:19] 311 is like, am I allowed to park in front of this guy's house?
[00:42:26] There's one that's like, call before you dig.
[00:42:31] There's one that's a number that's like, you got to call it before you dig a hole.
[00:42:36] If you want to pool, you have to call the number.
[00:42:41] What if there's a guy that doesn't, he doesn't understand and he calls the call before you
[00:42:52] And they're like, you can't, you can't do it.
[00:42:55] And they're like, because you'll hit a gas line.
[00:42:57] He's like, well, but I was going to bury mice.
[00:43:07] So nine eight eight, why are they, why are they venture away from the one one?
[00:43:12] You know, I always felt that they should just take the cops off nine one one.
[00:43:17] Who should be one should just be fire and ambulance.
[00:43:23] What if someone's being too loud at the movies?
[00:43:38] One eight hundred blackface clown in honor of George to tie who called the police on Clarence Thomas last week.
[00:43:49] Clarence Thomas is trying to steal my car.
[00:43:58] I think Clarence Thomas shop lifted from the cinnabon at the local mall.
[00:44:21] And I'm concerned that Clarence is committed.
[00:44:24] He's passing counterfeit twenty dollar bills.
[00:44:34] Not to be confused with homosexual Chinese actor George to Kai.
[00:44:52] I'm calling the police on George to Kai.
[00:44:56] Maybe you want to maybe we could do that.
[00:44:57] That could be the sketch after the model.
[00:45:00] We could George to Kai at home calling the police.
[00:45:16] Bring me my antique bathtub bedside and bathtub use only antique rotary phone that I use to make homosexual phone calls to young men.
[00:45:38] Carrying skittles and he's eleven years old.
[00:45:45] With a toy gun and he stole sugar pillows.
[00:45:50] And it's none other than Supreme Court justice.
[00:45:55] And I think you better go check him out.
[00:46:02] Oh we got one more monologue joke here.
[00:46:05] Experts explain why a Nordic meal plan packed full of berries, trout and dark leafy vegetables is likely the key to healthy living.
[00:46:14] Well the Nordic diet is the latest fad.
[00:46:17] Of course the crown jewel of all European weight loss diets remains the Holocaust Jew diet.
[00:46:27] With a steady diet of some buttons you smuggled into the prison in your ass.
[00:46:37] Women all over Hollywood are doing the Holocaust Jew diet.
[00:46:41] I love that they took sexy photos of the prisoners.
[00:46:49] I think that those were when they liberated the camps and they were like this is how bad it was.
[00:46:53] Oh so the GIs were like let's take some sexy photos.
[00:47:08] And the super guy he's got to be loving this.
[00:47:33] So we have a segue joke that I didn't actually include in the doc.
[00:47:39] The segue joke is about we mentioned it a couple of weeks ago but there's an ongoing legal dispute.
[00:47:58] You ever see the suicide pods that that guy makes?
[00:48:20] It's a machine you can order and you like wheel it out to like the edge of a cliff or something.
[00:48:24] And it just like it just blast you with nitrogen gas.
[00:48:27] So you suffocate essentially but I guess nitrogen like prevents like the panic response you have when your CO2 levels are raised too much in your blood.
[00:48:37] It's like hitting a nice cold fat in the lot.
[00:48:49] You just like lose consciousness or whatever.
[00:48:51] But I want one of those but there was like you know it's like oh I want you know it's just some old bitch that's got like ovarian cancer.
[00:48:59] I want to be in the woods in the Pacific Northwest looking out looking out at Puget Sound as I pass.
[00:49:43] We're way behind schedule because we're just finishing the monologue now and we're at 50 minutes.
[00:49:47] We got to figure out a way to tighten this up so that this part we're done with this part of the show.
[00:49:52] Kim will film this monologue in about 45 seconds.
[00:50:02] We'll pull up Kim will from well it's the weekend.
[00:50:05] But he said Anthony Anderson on all last week.
[00:50:09] He did a hilarious bit about not getting an Emmy for Blackish.
[00:50:20] I think white murder shows and they accused him of being the blackish was number one suspect.
[00:50:33] And I called her up and I said what if after that I know it's too late.
[00:50:36] The show's already filmed and this went straight to voicemail anyways.
[00:50:40] And I you know I said what if it's who called the police on Blackish is George to Kai.
[00:50:52] No she didn't think it went to voicemail.
[00:50:56] I got real drunk at a party a couple years ago and I was just like you fucking **** you people
[00:51:16] I had a white cloth and I didn't know how powerful they were.
[00:51:24] Well that's kind of how I saved myself at the everyone was looking at me at the end.
[00:51:42] I stood up in the middle of the Oscars and I said what is this?
[00:51:49] A ******* self-suck party for a bunch of **** bastards that **** made up the holocaust
[00:51:57] And now you're doing your own genocide.
[00:51:58] You're doing a genocide in **** Palestine and you're killing these people.
[00:51:59] And then you know, it's just you could hear a pin shot and I look around and go, uh, Mel
[00:52:09] Gibson anyone and then just standing ovation.
[00:52:22] Billy Crystal was like, I wish I could have saw that.
[00:52:26] Well, how are we talking about Billy Crystal?
[00:52:29] He came out of his whole thing that year.
[00:52:31] He's like, yeah, have you ever seen the movie?
[00:53:00] Ricky Martin says no way Jose to his nephew that is accusing him of incestuous rape.
[00:53:05] The Puerto Rican denies molesting his brother son by saying, now we've all heard of living
[00:53:18] The Puerto Rican start denies molesting his brother son saying now we've all heard of living
[00:53:22] a Vita that's Loca, but that would be a little too Loca too far.
[00:53:34] Wasn't that the seed name of the sequel?
[00:53:44] I don't know why I thought it was Flintstones to living.
[00:54:05] You said that during the rant at the Oscars.
[00:54:08] You're like, what about Flintstones too?
[00:54:11] Oh, it's because well, a couple of toys make a movie that can't win any fucking awards.
[00:54:22] And now the whole world wants a railroad.
[00:54:36] Damon, John, sold Fubu to a Jewish guy.
[00:54:45] So technically I should be allowed to wear that.
[00:54:51] You're allowed to wear whatever you want.
[00:54:53] So anyway, so that's the last joke on the monologue.
[00:54:56] That would be crazy if we finally got to a place where you weren't allowed to wear.
[00:55:04] If that was cultural appropriations, we're fucking Fubu.
[00:55:07] I mean, you think that's it's just a badass look.
[00:55:13] It'd be crazy to go back in time and explain to somebody where we ended up now.
[00:55:19] Oh, no, not Nick and Adam, but we as a society.
[00:55:24] Imagine a bizarro freak upside down world.
[00:55:29] They imagine a type of imagine a topsy turvy upside down world where a black people are
[00:55:41] They're not so distant and not so far away place.
[00:55:46] In a creepy future known as the Twilight Zone.
[00:55:51] Well, one man, a staple in this community, a police officer, noble and proud, tries to
[00:56:01] stop a career criminal from passing a $20 counterfeit bill and he pays the ultimate price
[00:56:16] I mean, it does feel like we're living in that.
[00:56:26] You know, I was watching CNN today and some bitch said as an ally of the, she said, I
[00:56:31] consider myself an ally of the LGBT community.
[00:56:35] But even I, you know, I don't really understand what the point is in saying pregnant people.
[00:56:49] I mean, the woke mob is going to come for that.
[00:56:54] So we need to get into the show here because we are way behind schedule.
[00:57:01] So then we'll go to the desk and talk Chinese Garamol bit.
[00:57:06] We go to the desk and you know, I forgot about it.
[00:57:11] So you walk, you walk to the desk and I figured, well, like we'll do an Allen thing where after
[00:57:16] So you're like Ricky Martin's a faggot, huh?
[00:57:18] And then, you know, then we got you like.
[00:57:28] We're doing an Allen style where you're bad at dancing.
[00:57:30] You're just some like, you're a billionaire lesbian is decked out in Cole's gear.
[00:57:36] Maybe that's my aesthetic for the show.
[00:57:40] I think you should just get like rhinestones studded Allen clothes.
[00:57:48] So you make it all your way over the chair.
[00:57:54] And then all the, all the, all the big old girls in the audience, they're all clapping
[00:58:00] And then we got a sketch we're doing which we'll just cut right to the schedule and
[00:58:08] I'm here reporting live at a local hospital where doctors are concerned that a new COVID
[00:58:21] And then, and then we go into one of the rooms and there's an elderly black man in the bed
[00:58:33] And you know, they're like, we spoke with one man who's displaying.
[00:58:41] The doctors are saying, and they're like, he came in last night and, you know, he's,
[00:58:48] And we suspect it's one of the new COVID variants and like, can you tell us a bit about what
[00:58:54] Like, man, I just, I can't stop thinking about pussy.
[00:58:59] I'll just, man, I'll just can't stop thinking about pussy.
[00:59:04] And they're like, they're saying that he can't stop thinking.
[00:59:08] And it's a horrifying new symptom of the Omocron, the Omocron mutation.
[00:59:17] The Omocron Delta, the Delta 88, the Osmobile Delta 88 variant.
[00:59:22] Of the of the Omocron, the Omocron violent.
[00:59:26] Let's go back to the only punchline in this sketch real quick.
[00:59:38] I just want to go home and see my family.
[01:00:04] So the best piece is like, you know how like Conan used to just sit there and he would
[01:00:06] have like, he would go through like local like news, like kind of like like a like a
[01:00:15] I think Leno would do typos in the news.
[01:00:18] But Conan would do Conan would have fun.
[01:00:20] One of the funniest things I ever saw in my life that had one.
[01:00:24] They would just go through advertisements and newspapers.
[01:00:28] But there was one for reading glasses and it just said, impress your friends by pretending
[01:00:37] And yeah, when I was a young boy and that really hit that one hit hard.
[01:00:44] Something about somebody like people pretending they know how to read.
[01:00:51] It's a huge influence on my comedy now.
[01:00:52] People really it became cool to shit on Jay.
[01:00:55] My comedy now, which is just Ray racist.
[01:00:59] You saw him bliddling the illiterate and you're like, who else?
[01:01:10] So and then we do the desk piece and desk piece.
[01:01:11] I initially wanted to do an I kind of put it on a Twitter to gauge people's feelings.
[01:01:15] We do like say examples of shrink flation because I don't know if you've seen that.
[01:01:32] So inflation is I think maybe the next episode when we talk about inflation.
[01:01:40] What the fuck is we have to talk about that?
[01:01:43] Shrinkflation is where things become more expensive, but then they also make the, you
[01:01:49] So it's like we would have like here's some examples and we open a bag of chips and there's
[01:02:01] So like, you know, like, like a Swedish fish and there's just like Ikea hardware in the
[01:02:11] Like those wooden dowels that break immediately.
[01:02:21] If basically any model, look at this guy, hang them.
[01:02:22] So basically any Walker, Texas, Ranger.
[01:02:27] Any, any joke you can always just bail into like, where the hell do they get this thing?
[01:02:39] Well, I want to do that, but for the desk piece this week, I was going to say we do, you
[01:02:44] know, because the topic is is families, families blood thicker than water.
[01:02:50] Well, you say a lot of people think hunter Biden might be the worst relative.
[01:02:54] But there's actually a lot of presidential relatives that everybody remembers.
[01:03:04] famous drunken retard Billy Carter who if crack were around today or back then, I'm sure
[01:03:14] I'm sure Billy Carter would have been illegally obtaining a gun and taking pictures of himself,
[01:03:18] naked in bed with his 11 year old niece and there would be screen caps of him texting
[01:03:27] You know, but there's actually way more president, William Howard Taft.
[01:03:31] A lot of people remember him for being a big fat funny fat.
[01:03:37] But he actually had a brother who was emaciated.
[01:03:42] He had a skinny little, little gay, weenie brother.
[01:03:56] I mean, photoshop, William Howard Taft, small, small and be like, yeah, his brother.
[01:04:06] Who back then did the only drug available, which was bull semen.
[01:04:10] That was the only thing you could get high off was fermented bull semen.
[01:04:14] And you had to go, you know, get it yourself from a farm.
[01:04:25] I was going to spend time thinking about it.
[01:04:27] But like, you know, listen, we're giving people a preview of what the show is going to be.
[01:04:35] He was the one famously killed, dragged out and killed.
[01:04:44] But he actually, he had a brother in law who's a skinny little weasily kind of gay guy.
[01:05:01] You know, because they, the Roman offs, they've got it coming.
[01:05:06] People love it when royals get knocked down a peg, you know.
[01:05:09] They sounded like they were roaming off of their lane.
[01:05:18] We'll have more dancing there at that point.
[01:05:21] Who are some other funny, funny, uh, presidents brothers?
[01:05:31] Sam Kinison was Eskimo brothers with Bill Clinton.
[01:05:35] If you know that, but there's a famous story of the two of them, uh, basically like,
[01:05:40] the drugging and raping a 14 or 15 year old girl together in Arkansas back when he was
[01:05:46] Well, that's a, he got his start kind of.
[01:06:01] Here's a rancor.com 10 presidential siblings who embarrassed POTUS.
[01:06:14] He's the corrupt younger brother of president Ulysses S. Grant.
[01:06:16] He's rumored to have been a pretty shady guy who's always looking to make a quick buck
[01:06:21] He was an emaciated skinny little weasel guy.
[01:06:42] I love that he's like, he's the, he's basically as African as you can be.
[01:07:03] Billy Carter really had such an amazing look.
[01:07:10] I'm not going to, I forget what the hold on.
[01:07:17] He launched his own beer and then killed himself.
[01:08:03] Like the guy to be an embarrassing guy, but you're still, you've got a powdered wig.
[01:08:07] Yeah, you're still like, like in those days, you'd be like a buckle and powdered wig.
[01:08:13] You're like, I think I'm going to go down to the farm and fuck a sheep.
[01:08:20] I've fancied a queerness to my affect in a way that has humiliated my brother, who has
[01:08:33] He's dedicated his life to public service, whereas I am but a jester of the pubs.
[01:08:42] I've gone, I've gone and embarrassed my brother again by sodomizing yet another sheep during
[01:08:53] I've, all of our sisters have been killed.
[01:08:57] I blamed it on them and said they've put a curse.
[01:09:03] A ponx on our home that caused me to make love, make the beast with two backs of the town
[01:09:11] sheep, yet again in the town square after I've had just thimble too many of the divine
[01:09:20] Brother of John Quincy Charles Adams was a victim of alcoholism.
[01:09:24] Charles, the child of Abigail and John Adams was described as somewhat self-destructive.
[01:09:30] He was not abandoned, has previously been betrayed by the media, but when he was sent
[01:09:33] overseas to the ages nine of his father, he panicked the process, believed his mother
[01:09:36] and poorly remained homesick for months after he arrived.
[01:09:39] He was rebellious and expelled from Harvard.
[01:09:45] In the 1799, John Adams renounced Charles, calling him a mere rake, block of blood and
[01:09:57] William Johnson, that's Andrew Johnson's brother.
[01:10:01] Yeah, that would have, that would have really killed.
[01:10:02] We could have gone to that and that would have been fun.
[01:10:05] These are the kind of things where as soon as we got that studio and once my touring
[01:10:08] drives up and I got a little bit more time, you know, to, I'm telling you, once we get
[01:10:14] that, I don't give a fuck out much money we lose.
[01:10:17] We got a studio, a little production office.
[01:10:22] Look, when you start making money, you blow it on PlayStation or like track suits or dumb
[01:10:28] jewelry or replacement tooth or, you know, like just dumb shit, they're dumping.
[01:10:35] And then you're like, no, I got to blow it on project.
[01:10:39] We are going to spend all of our money on this.
[01:10:44] And we are potentially going to alienate our audience.
[01:10:54] There's a rise and there deserves to be a fall.
[01:10:57] This is the second half of Boogie Nights after Coke.
[01:10:59] Oh, I just had this other sketch idea where one of the property brothers is gay and the
[01:11:04] other covers from by being gay also, even though he's straight.
[01:11:08] Because that's on the topic of like, you know, how far do you go for family?
[01:11:17] So if it turns out that only Jonathan Scott is a homo, right, the other one's like, I'll
[01:11:28] So the first guest obviously is going to be your retarded cousin.
[01:11:37] Coming to this stage, ladies and gentlemen, Adam's retarded cousin.
[01:11:50] It's exploitive and I kind of want to keep my personal life out of the show at this point
[01:11:58] Oh, you're just bringing this guy, this poor guy up on stage.
[01:12:07] It was pretty funny though when he said to me that the BLM riots were happening outside
[01:12:14] I said, did you look at it out through, you know, through your window?
[01:12:17] And he said, no, he was watching on TV.
[01:12:33] Oh, well, I thought that's kind of, that's what gave this episode a personal flair.
[01:12:55] I mean, we can have on Ricky Martin's nephew.
[01:12:58] Who was embarrassing him by accusing him of rape of ancestral on-station.
[01:13:05] And we sort of, that's the hunter Biden of the Ricky Martin La Familia.
[01:13:11] And then we have, you know, bring him out on stage and then, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah,
[01:13:14] dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah,
[01:13:17] You know, he's doing, he's hamming it up for the audience.
[01:13:24] We'll say Eduardo, would you say that Ricky Martin went to Viva Rock Vegas in your asshole?
[01:13:33] And then, yeah, and then he's like, yeah, this is very funny.
[01:13:40] Ricky Martin is in a homosexual relationship with his own nephew.
[01:13:51] What else in the family is saying that this nephew is a, is, like, has mental problems
[01:13:58] Well, next week, the show topic is going to be mental illness.
[01:14:02] Does that, does being mentally ill preclude you from producing one of the greatest talk
[01:14:08] And we're going to have Ricky Martin's nephew on to discuss his mental illness.
[01:14:14] And is it possible to be both mentally ill and a victim?
[01:14:21] It's either Ricky Martin molested this kid and beat him up, or he's crazy.
[01:14:32] Going back to the presidential siblings thing, the Kennedy sister that they had lobotomized
[01:14:38] Well, I was going to say we should have Rosemary Clooney on.
[01:15:06] We'll have her on for our musical guest tonight on the Adam Friedland show, Rosemary Clooney
[01:15:13] Usually you're all such small-accested women like this.
[01:15:16] Why am I getting targeted ads for some-
[01:15:18] Honestly, now that we have the show, you have to pay $10.
[01:15:30] The native dances and the charming song.
[01:15:39] So you're saying that was an Irish woman?
[01:15:44] Back in the day, there would be like one Jewish guy in 1870 that wrote every popular
[01:15:55] It's like three Jewish guys in like the industrial age.
[01:16:02] They were like, how about- there's one where it's the twisting and the shouting.
[01:16:06] How about the colored guy who's twisting and shouting?
[01:16:17] Well, how about we do another song with, yeah.
[01:16:25] We'll write the same song over and over again.
[01:16:27] So I've Rosemary Clooney on because she was, I think she was a bit of a boozer.
[01:16:39] And then we segue to the end of the show, our final thought.
[01:16:44] And so this one, this episode, maybe not particularly funny, but we got the format.
[01:16:51] Listen, this is what people are excited about.
[01:16:57] I was also saying maybe we could have Don Swayze on, but I don't know if he's embarrassing
[01:17:09] I don't think he's famous for being a loser.
[01:17:13] He's just known as being Don Swayze's brother or Patrick Swayze's brother.
[01:17:25] He looks like a guy doing a Patrick Swayze impression.
[01:17:27] He looks like, he looks like there's, there's one guy that works, that one guy that works
[01:17:36] at Caroline's, he kind of looks like him.
[01:17:43] I don't know if he works at Caroline's.
[01:17:58] He doesn't look like anything like Don Swayze.
[01:18:10] So the final thought, and this is where, this is your time to shine.
[01:18:22] And this is where, you know, we have to imagine that if we had done this for real, your retarded
[01:18:31] I would have had to do it for the audience.
[01:18:33] He would have tried to touch Rosemary Colleen.
[01:18:39] It's more of a Jewish like Kyle's cousin.
[01:18:45] And then I want to touch Rosemary Colleen.
[01:18:55] Did you ever meet the guy that wrote a mombo Italian?
[01:19:03] God, even just doing that voice makes me feel like I'm in a fucking gas chain.
[01:19:22] He's two Jewish to function in normal society.
[01:19:44] So yeah, so the final thought I speaks directly to camera is kind of a.
[01:19:48] How is it that flat screens are sold on backmarket in 1951?
[01:19:54] I'm just going to sit here and watch that part.
[01:19:58] What I got to watch two fucking goddamn ads now.
[01:20:10] That kid over there is my cousin from the East Coast.
[01:20:11] He's having a really hard time right now.
[01:20:12] So I'm going to offer you $40 to not rip on him.
[01:20:14] 40 bucks, but you can't make fun of him at all.
[01:20:21] And you especially can't say anything about Jews.
[01:20:22] Oh Jesus, why did you just cut off my bars?
[01:20:25] All you have to do is keep your mouth shut and you've got 40 bucks.
[01:20:29] You can go ahead and do the final thought.
[01:20:32] I'm just going to want to listen to this.
[01:20:43] You know, I thought that same jacket you're wearing at Bosco for $29.95.
[01:20:47] I'm just wondering how I'm going to give it off.
[01:20:53] He texts me when there are sales going on.
[01:20:59] This is what the show would have been, dude.
[01:21:09] I don't know if I've said this on the show.
[01:21:10] I've definitely said it at Funny Malls, but...
[01:21:12] In the same way that Hunter Biden has...
[01:21:15] He used to get kicked out at the Kraken prostitutes.
[01:21:16] Your cousin's addicted to being Jewish.
[01:21:18] He used to bike to the mall and daily and then get kicked out of the Apple Store because
[01:21:25] he was following patrons around and saying, that's not the right technology.
[01:21:30] And they were like, you don't work here.
[01:21:38] I saw that same jacket at Bosco for $29.95.
[01:21:43] He texts me and he's like, Brooks Brothers is having that annual event.
[01:21:51] And then, you know, he's embarrassing you.
[01:21:55] I saw him at my mother's funeral and then at my grandmother's funeral before that.
[01:22:02] That would have been a perfect guess for the Hunter Biden episode.
[01:22:07] Yeah, we'd have to fly him out, put him up at the Plaza Hotel.
[01:22:15] But think about how much cheaper it is to take the bus.
[01:22:18] I think he'd miss his parents a little.
[01:22:24] You know, have him come out, teach him how to dance.
[01:22:28] You know, listen, so for the final thought, final thought, we're going to wrap it up.
[01:22:39] But does that make family less important?
[01:22:41] You certainly can't choose your family now that it's illegal to have an abortion.
[01:22:49] But if you're a bitch, you definitely can't choose your family.
[01:22:55] So you get Supreme Court delivered a devastating blow to bitches this week after blackface
[01:23:03] cloud and Clarence Thomas after trying to slip a counterfeit $20 bill to a Walgreens
[01:23:09] employee removed women's rights to choose.
[01:23:14] And the police said nothing because the damn black lives matter movement.
[01:23:18] Anyway, if only we could have to mere rice back and put Clarence Thomas in his place.
[01:23:31] Thank you, everyone, for your condolences.
[01:23:46] And he was not my fascist Japanese boyfriend.
[01:23:56] No matter if you don't talk to them ever again in their life or still you're.
[01:24:00] The big divide in American culture is either you like Shinzo Abe or you like Mishima.
[01:24:28] You like one type of gay little weird Japanese guy.
[01:24:33] You got to pick stones or beetles Takai or Mishima.
[01:24:40] Even if you don't talk to them ever again, they're still your family.
[01:24:44] But when push comes to shove, when bad things happen, they're the people you want around.
[01:24:54] I tell you, push came to shove on the stairs in Ivanka Trump's house.
[01:25:04] Ivanka is the daughter who I do more than.
[01:25:09] Yeah, a lot of people say, oh Donald Trump fucks his daughter.
[01:25:11] And it's like, well, the name is so close.
[01:25:17] That's why I'll never name my son after me.
[01:25:45] As the American family dissolves, Americans and Americans feel less included in a community.
[01:25:57] We see a rise in many other problems like mass shootings and the decline of the amount
[01:26:02] of sex that young people are having these days.
[01:26:05] People don't feel like they're part of communities.
[01:26:06] And that's because they don't feel like they're part of families.
[01:26:09] Because of course, family is the first community that you join.
[01:26:13] So today on The Adam Friedland Show, I want to tell our listeners to keep your family
[01:26:17] close, even if they drive you crazy, even if they fly to South Africa to see your 91-year-old
[01:26:22] grandmother and then to get power of attorney over her bank account, you got to keep them
[01:26:29] Because that's still your family, even if they're trying to steal whatever's left.
[01:26:38] But he's not on that side of the family.
[01:26:40] And no one's actually done that in my family.
[01:26:43] But theoretically, were they to do that to my 91-year-old grandmother would be pretty
[01:26:47] hurtful to the rest of the people on our side.
[01:26:48] Do you think at some point in your family history, some of them told the German authorities
[01:26:53] or someone else was so that they could secure inheritance or...
[01:27:00] Basically, it'd be like, well, you know, what was out of the way?
[01:27:04] The answer is that everyone that's in my family got out before and everyone who didn't
[01:27:10] If they snitched, they didn't do it that well.
[01:27:15] But everyone that I descend from escaped.
[01:27:19] So the final thought with this one is what?
[01:27:24] The final thought is that the American family, as we see it erode, as people kick their family
[01:27:34] members, kick the people that they share blood with out of their lives, and community therefore
[01:27:43] To our listeners, if you have problems...
[01:27:46] Ultimately, we want you to end on an opinion as to whether or not Joe Biden should have
[01:27:50] to answer for Hunter Biden being a gun-toting pedophile, crack smoking allegedly.
[01:28:11] I think maybe we could play the Fast and the Furious, Paul Walker.
[01:28:18] It's been a long time without you, my friend.
[01:28:24] Your cousin's like, I live my life a quarter at a time.
[01:28:35] In future episodes, maybe we should start with figuring out the final thought and where
[01:28:39] The final thought, we need copy for it.
[01:28:41] But I think structurally it's coming together.
[01:28:44] And I hope it's interesting to the people that are listening, even if they're upset
[01:28:47] and make for being a lib now, that's the pivot that we're taking.
[01:28:50] Dude, as long as you're talking to an amateur abortionist.
[01:28:56] So basically, we're going to navigate the political spectrum like a laser room and an
[01:29:03] You know, just kind of weave our way constantly turning and twisting, contorting ourselves
[01:29:09] until we get to that precious jewel right in the middle.
[01:29:22] Whatever the, all this true crime, whatever that true crime bullshit is.
[01:29:29] We're going to steal your audience by murdering an actual woman on this show.
[01:29:36] And that is going to be must see television.
[01:29:39] We're going to get an actual, we're going to murder a woman somewhere in the back rooms
[01:29:47] And spend the entire series figuring out where she's, where she was killed.
[01:29:52] And the exact details of her sexual demise.
[01:30:01] So if you're, if you're a guy, you got a woman in your life.
[01:30:05] And she's always hated a certain show, a podcast of a certain name.
[01:30:09] You can tell her that there's a different one now.
[01:30:17] And it's not the old kind of show about rape.
[01:30:20] We just laugh about somebody getting raped.
[01:30:27] We're going to try to get a true crime podcast about something that's already happening.
[01:30:33] We can consume true crime rape the way like a trucker eats beef jerky.
[01:30:40] It's just like a big bag of like dried out disgusting.
[01:30:48] They just consume mindlessly just sucking on this like sodium rich shit that constricts
[01:30:56] Maybe, maybe that's the topic for the next week is rape.